ღ Week To Remember ღ
by Lolly4Holly
Summary: Nick is married to Starla, stuck in an unhappy marriage of 3yrs. They're not really a match made in heaven and Nick's cheated on her plenty of times. Greg is hopelessly in love with Nick, stuck in the friend zone. COMPLETE! Written from Greg's POV
1. Chapter 1

**Week To Remember**

**Author: Lolly4Holly / No Beta this time**

**I used to write stories from a single persons point of view all the time. This is one I wrote a while ago. I'm changing the whole storyline and adding more chapters, but I thought you'd like to read the first chapter to tell me if its any good.**

_**Summary: Set shortly after 'Grave Danger', towards the beginning of Season Six. Nick is married to Starla (Made up character), stuck in an unhappy marriage of three years. He married her shortly after 'Stalker', not wanting to be alone anymore. They're not really a match made in heaven and Nick's cheated on her plenty of times. Greg is in love with Nick, stuck in the middle as Nick always goes to him for help on his marriage.**_

**Rating: M – For language, sex and nudity.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own CSI, or any of it's characters.**

**Written from Greg Sander's Point Of View!!!**

* * *

**Chapter One:**

_Kill me now_! I thought as the pounding persisted. I blinked a couple times, turning to the clock beside my bed. At first glance all I saw was a blur of green. I rubbed my eyes, taking another look. _Nine o'clock in the morning. Who pounds on the door at nine in the morning when I got home at seven after the longest shift ever?_ And still the pounding continued.

I threw back the covers, willing my limbs awake as I stumbled from the bed, grabbing the edge of the bedside table to support myself so I didn't go crashing into the ground. I gave my legs a moment then sleepily shuffled off down the hall, guided by the pounding of my front door. Only one person I know that beats down my door like that.

"Ouch! Shit!" I hobbled back realising I had just stubbed my toe on the edge of the kitchen counter. "Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!" I hopped, feeling tears in my eyes from the pain. I hopped on my left foot, leaning against the wall to look at my bright red little toe. "Ow!" I winced, gently placing it back down on the ground. I hopped in agony towards the door before the angry Texan broke through. "Jeez, hang on. I'm coming." I shouted, wincing in agony. I pulled the door open with the chain on, peering through to look at him. And sure enough it was Nick Stokes.

"What?" I snapped at him, sleepily rubbing my eyes.

"Lemme in." He insisted.

"Nick! I'm tired; I really can't handle one of your emotional melt downs right now."

"Emotional melt downs?" He snapped right back then slammed his fist angrily into my door, almost snapping the chain from it. "Lemme in or I'll break your fuckin' door down."

"Hang on." I groaned, pushing the door shut to take it off the chain. I leant my head against the door, really not wanting to see Nick right now, but if I left him in the hall any longer he'd break down my door and the neighbours would not be pleased.

I slid the chain from the lock, Nick heard it and opened the door, barging straight in, heading for the kitchen. "Come in why don't you." I said sarcastically, pushing the door shut then staggering over to the sofa to inspect my toe.

Nick returned with a beer, dropping onto the couch beside me. His eyes were swollen and bloodshot and he already smelt like he had drank his fair share of alcohol. "She threw me out." He simply said, throwing back his beer so half was gone with one swig.

"Really? Again . . . how tragic. You know where the blankets are..." I went to stand up, but he grabbed my wrist pulling me back down.

"What the fuck was that Greg?" He shouted at me.

"Whaddya want me to say Nick? You had it coming."

"No I didn't. What the fuck did I do?"

"You mean who." I corrected. "Nick I've been saying it since you married her. You and Scarla..."

"Starla." He corrected.

"That's what I said. You and STAR-la, aren't right for each other. You've slept with half the police force, some of the lab crew, even Kristie Hopkins..."

"Don't bring that up again!"

"It's the truth Nick. You've been together five years, married three, loyal one. That's the truth. Now goodnight." I went to climb to my feet again but he pulled me back down.

"Greg, she didn't throw me out coz of another screw."

"Why'd she throw you out then?" I groaned, thinking I knew the answer already, but he wasn't going to let me sleep unless he got it off his chest.

"I had another nightmare. She said she couldn't put up with it anymore. She threatened to terminate the pregnancy unless I left."

"She threw you out coz you had a nightmare?" I asked surprised. Nick nodded, polishing off his beer then going back to the fridge for another. "That's fucked up."

"Tell me about it. My parents are really psyched for this baby too..."

"Whoa, whoa." I climbed to my feet looking at him shocked. "Did you say Starlas pregnant?"

"Yeah." He nodded at me as if I was stupid.

"Since when?" I shouted, stuffing my hands on my hips.

"I didn't tell you that?" He asked looking at me. I shook my head feeling hurt. "She's only like 6 weeks or somethin' . . . my parents are really psyched. It'll be their tenth grandchild. How could she say that so casually?" Nick asked me. I shrugged thinking how my mother was complaining she hadn't even got one grandchild from me yet. I dropped heavily to the couch, watching Nick downing his second beer.

Nick dropped back down beside me, staring up at the clock as he gulped down his beer. "I'm sorry I woke you G." He apologised. "Is your toe okay?"

"Yep, the blinding pain soon turned to a numbing one." I chuckled getting a smile out of him. "So you wonna stay on the couch again?"

"If you don't mind." I hobbled to my feet, fetching the usual blanket, tossing it towards Nick. "Night G."

"Night." I smiled, stumbling back down the hall to my room. I left the door slightly open in case Nick had a nightmare so I'd be able to hear him better. Since we rescued him from that coffin he hasn't been sleeping well, waking up in a sweat thinking he's back in that coffin again.

I threw myself onto the bed, pulling the covers back around me, trying to get back to sleep. I had only left the bed for a moment, but already the sheets were cold. Sometimes I hate Las Vegas, scorching hot weather throughout the day then freezing cold nights only to wake up sweating buckets again.

It was ridiculous!

About an hour later I heard shuffling from the living room. I rolled to my side, watching the gap in the door, wondering if I should go see if he was okay. Then I heard a loud thumb.

I threw back the covers, hustling down the hall to see Nick had decided to bury his fist into my wall. "What did you do?" I immediately snapped, making him jump as he didn't know I was in the room. I rushed to his side, looking at the missing hand inside my wall.

"Sorry about your wall."

"Damn the wall. You could have hit an electrical cable or something." I shouted, trying to find a way to carefully pull his hand from the wall, but it was very firmly imbedded. "Did it make you feel better?" I asked getting a smile from him.

"A little." He nodded. I rolled my eyes at him, ducking under his arm so my back was just inches from his chest, carefully pulling his fist from the wall. "Ow!" He winced. I held his hand looking at the blood across his knuckles. "Sorry I woke you . . . again." I grabbed some paper towels from the kitchen, gently placing them over his bloody knuckles.

"I wasn't asleep that time." I pulled him towards the sink, fetching the first aid kit from underneath. "Does it hurt?"

"Thankfully I can't feel much." He smirked, leaning his back against the counter beside the sink. I carefully washed his hand under the tap, cleaning it with some disinfectant then carefully wrapped a bandage around it. Nick watched me the whole time, flinching as I wrapped the bandage around, carefully fastening it with some tape.

"How's that?"

"Okay I guess . . . thanks G." I nodded looking up into his deep dark chocolate brown eyes. He gave me a half smile then walked back over to the sofa, slumping his head in his hands. I dumped the bloody tissues in the bin then leant against the breakfast counter watching Nick.

I grabbed two beers from the fridge, offering one to the emotional wreck that had been crashing on my sofa every fortnight since the lab explosion. I'd like to think he came here for me, but really it was because Warrick was living with his girlfriend who he's now married to so Nick needed another single guy to crash in on unannounced.

He took the beer from my hands, watching me drop to the sofa beside him. "You can go back to bed if you like?" He said leaning back on the sofa beside me.

"Nope, I'm good here. So spill already. I'm all ears."

He started stammering at first, talking about Scarla, _I mean Starla_ then came the tears, slurred speech, onto the baby he doesn't really want because of the woman he's with; even though he desperately wants to be a father someday, but with the right girl. Then came the blubbering, more slurred speech. I opened the scotch bottle trying to get him to go to sleep, but the more he drank, the more he talked.

The complete opposite of me.

I woke up a few hours later, softly rubbing my eyes open to see Nick fast asleep and snoring right beside me. I stretched out, giving out a wide yawn realising I had been awoken by a phone. I reached across the table for Nick's phone, seeing 'Starlas' name flashing across the screen. I looked between Nick and the phone, letting it go to voicemail as I didn't know how much Nick had slept so he'd probably be a little out of it and not in the right state of mind to talk to her.

Just as I was about to move, Nick suddenly slid down the sofa back, dropping his head to my thigh. _Darn it. _I carefully shifted my weight, trying not to disturb him as I slid out from under him. I gently lowered his head to the sofa then stumbled back, tripping over my coffee table to crash on the ground behind it. "Ooo, Ow." I winced, landing on my backside on the hard wood floor. I leant up on my elbows then saw Nick staring at me. "Hi." I awkwardly smiled.

"How much did you drink?" He immediately asked. I shrugged, climbing to my feet, rubbing my elbows from the throbbing pain. "You okay?"

"I'm fine." I nodded nervously, making my way to the kitchen to put on some coffee. I watched as Nick rubbed his eyes, stretching out his muscles. _Should I tell him Scarla called? Or should I let him have a good morning first? _I couldn't make up my mind so I decided not to tell him, to let him find out himself as I had dropped the phone by the coffee table when I fell over.

"Hey G." He walked into the kitchen running a hand through his hair. "Mind if I use your shower?"

"No, go ahead. You know where it is." He smiled at me then walked off up the hall. I waited until I heard the water going then retrieved the phone from the floor to listen to the message Scarla had left him. _Damn it, I mean Starla. _I rolled my eyes, pressing the phone to my ear as I watched the bathroom to make sure I wasn't noticed. There's nothing the Texan hates more than invasion of his personal privacy. Since his stalker Nigel Crane he had become very paranoid.

I hit play to listen to the message. "_Nick its me. We need to talk. I didn't mean what I said last night. We really need to talk though. Call me as soon as you get this and you better not be sleeping around." _I bit my lip thinking about deleting it. If Nick went back to her he'd take her back in a second then three days or less he'd be back on my sofa sobbing his heart out again, making me promise not to tell anyone and it really wasn't healthy for him considering what he had been through this past year.

_Shit! _I tossed the phone to the sofa, pretending to be reading through old post as Nick remerged from the shower with a towel wrapped around his waist, dripping wet torso and water running from his hair down his facial features.

I started to wonder if he ever did this at Warrick's place. He didn't seem to notice me just headed straight for the kitchen to fish two coffee cups from the top cupboard to pour out some of my famous blue Hawaiian coffee that everybody loves. I make a note not to leave it unattended in the break-room too long as it tends to disappear within seconds. They all go crazy for my coffee.

"Nick." I blurted. He spun round to look at me curiously. I wasn't sure what my first question was going to be, but I just had to ask because it was really killing me not knowing. I walked towards the kitchen, leaning against the opposite counter. "Do you really want this baby?"

Nick stopped what he was doing, placing his thumps inside his towel as if it was a belt. "I . . . I don't know." He stammered out.

"Don't bite my head off for talking about this. I know you were drunk . . . but you said you wanted a baby with someone you actually loved. Do you love Scarla?"

Nick immediately smiled as I called her Scarla again. I call her that because at their wedding when it was Nick's turn to say his vows to her he said Scarla instead of Starla, erupting laughter from everyone except his bride and her parents. Nick couldn't finish his vows because he was laughing so hard.

"Starla yah mean? I don't know G . . . the truth is." He looked me in the eyes a moment. "The truth is I've never been in love G . . . I don't know what it feels like. I like Starla . . . sometimes, but I've never . . . never loved her."

"Never?" I asked shocked. "Then why'd you marry her?" Nick shrugged shaking his head at me. "Then why are you wasting your life away with her?"

He did his usual grunt, shrug then turned to pour out the coffee, placing the warm mug in my hands then walked off to the bathroom to get dressed. He emerged fifteen minutes later fully clothed placing his empty mug in the dishwasher, collecting his things from the sofa along with his phone then turned to look at me.

"See yah later G." He waved, heading out the door. As soon as the door clicked shut I made my way to my bedroom, dropping sleepily to the mattress. I've never known anyone like Nick in my whole life. He's intolerable, how can someone breeze through their 'okay' life, living in denial so he won't hurt anyone's feelings. _Doesn't he want to be happy?_

I placed my coffee on the side, grabbing my phone to call Grissom for a day off. Lucky for me I had saved up on a lot of vacation time and I was up to my eyes in overtime making Ecklie want to keep me out of the office.

I finally crawled into my bedding, finally able to get some decent sleep.

* * *

_No! Please No! _I groaned hearing a loud banging echoing through my apartment. My head was already splitting from the hangover. _Damn you Nick! _I rolled out from under the warm covers, heading towards the front door, being careful not to stub my toe this time. I yanked open the door to see Nick stood there again with a box in his hands.

"Oh you shouldn't have." I said sarcastically.

"This is my stuff. The bitch threw me out . . . again!" He shouted, pushing past me to place the box of his things on my coffee table. I looked up at the clock seeing I slept an entire day. "I can't believe I sold my place so I could move in with her. And why didn't you tell me she called?" He shouted at me pointing an accusing finger at me.

"I'm sor-ry Nick." I said sarcastically again in an annoyed tone. "I worked a triple shift then had one hour's sleep last night, before you showed up pounding on my door. I then had to listen to a sloppy drunk rambling about his fucked up life all night as well as the first aid. I currently have a fucking hangover and now you're here again . . . so it must have slipped my mind." I shouted, surprising him.

"Why the fuck are you yellin' at me?" He shouted angrily.

"Because..." I ran my fingers through my hair looking up at him. "I'm sorry."

"You better be. I just had to put up with Starla yellin' at me..."

"Well maybe you deserved it." I shouted, pissing him off even more. "Do you ever think about anyone but yourself Nick? You may be the guy with the biggest heart on our team, but you're a real asshole outside of work." I said then stormed off down the hall to my bedroom, throwing myself onto my bed to bury myself under the covers.

As soon as I hit the mattress I started to regret shouting at him like that. He is a hot headed Texan after all and my heads softer then a wall. I nervously watched the door expecting him to come bursting through it any second with an angry look on his face, but instead I heard the light click of my front door. _Opps. _I sat up hoping it was just the door closing and Nick was still here, but there was no movement or sounds coming from outside my bedroom door so he must have really left. _Maybe that wasn't such a good idea. _I scolded myself. The last thing Nick needed was to be shouted at by a cranky hang over victim.

"God I'm so stupid!" I shouted, throwing myself back to the pillows.

"You're not stupid." I sat up startled to see Nick stood in the doorway. He pushed it open wider to look at me. "Sorry I shouted at you . . . woke you up and gave you a hangover." He apologised, leaning against the doorframe. "This is the reason why I stopped goin' to Warrick's."

"He got fed up with hangovers?"

"No . . . it was ruinin' our friendship. I take my anger out on everyone around me. I'm sorry Greg." He folded his arms across his chest, looking down at the ground. "I'll get out of your way..."

"No wait." He looked up to meet my eyes. "I'm sorry I shouted at you. I get cranky when I'm hung over. You can stay as long as you like."

"Are you sure G?"

_No! _"Yep, I'm sure." _You idiot. _I scolded myself. "I might even consider buying a bed for the guestroom so you can stay in there." _Now you're asking him to move in with you? Why don't you ask him to jump into bed while you're at it?_

"You don't have to do that G."

"No its okay. You can stay as long as you like." _What would your mother say Gregory? _I scolded myself again. "So whaddya say?"

"Okay . . . but I'll buy the bed and I'll fix that hole in your wall. I wonna pay my way too, I'm not a charity case."

"Sure, name your price."

"You want me to tell you how much I'll pay for rent?" He asked surprised. I thought about it a moment then nodded. "You're crazy Greg." He chuckled shaking his head at me. "How much rent do yah pay for this place? I'll pay half and we'll split the utilities."

I quickly calculated it in my head. "That works out to about eight hundred a month then."

"Seriously?"

"That too high? How about three hundred?" I suggested. Nick laughed again shaking his head.

"I'll pay nine hundred, how's that." I looked at him wide eyed. "Okay that's a deal, now I'll go get you a hangover remedy. You have aspirin right?"

"Cupboard beside sink." He nodded heading down the hall to retrieve it. _Oh Crap! _I dropped back to my pillow realising what I had just done. At twenty-nine, I still hadn't learnt my lesson by allowing guys I had crushes on to move in with me. Especially straight guys! What was I thinking letting Nick move in here with me. He had no idea I was bisexual nor would he want to know about my life style. I was lucky the guys or girls I brought back with me never wanted to stay over, just in case he did come calling round one day.

"Here you go." I jumped as he placed the coffee and aspirin down on my bedside table as I hadn't even realised he was in my room again.

"Thanks." I smiled, pulling the covers over my body so he couldn't see my semi-hard on.

"Thanks for lettin' me stay here G. It really means a lot to me."

"You're welcome." I reached for my keys by the clock, taking off the spare set.

"You keep your spare set with your other set?" He asked curiously as I dropped them to his hand.

"I have been told that's stupid." I chuckled. "But I have a spare set at my parent's house, somewhere in the kitchen and with my neighbour."

"Oh." He smiled. "Okay, well I'm goin' to have lunch with my dad. Will I see you at work?"

"No I booked the day off."

"Okay, catch yah later then." He smiled again, heading out my bedroom door. I sighed heavily, dropping back to my pillow. I had always been jealous of Nick and Starla, mostly Starla because she got to have the Texan beauty. He wasn't just a one night stand or a good time. He was the one I had fallen in love with since day one. I've been hopelessly in love with him since I saw him at a conference in LA almost ten years ago. He was twenty-three and I was eighteen, fresh out of Highschool and I picked forensic science as my major, all because of him. He probably doesn't remember me from back then but as soon as I looked into his eyes, I knew I loved him. Then to my surprise here I am ten years later still in love with him and _still _haven't told him.

Warrick however knew I swung both ways. He caught me out with one of my boyfriends when I first joined the lab. It's kinda hard to cover up the fact you're at least partly gay when you've got your tongue down a guy's throat and his hands resting on your crotch _talk about incriminating evidence, _especially as it was my first week in Vegas and Warrick thought I was a little weird from day one. I've never been more embarrassed in my life. But he never told anyone which is really cool of him. I suppose the real question is 'What was Warrick doing in a gay bar?' I never thought to ask though; I was too wound up with my own embarrassment.

"Hey Greg!" _Shit! What's he still doing here?_

"Yeah?"

"There's a Ryan guy here to see you."

_Double Shit!!! _I scrambled out of bed, rushing down the hall to see Ryan stood in the doorway wearing a fishnet tank top and tight jeans. Nick gave me an awkward smile then walked off out the door heading out to the elevator. I waited for the doors to close before I turned to Ryan.

"Wow, he's a step up from your usual type." Ryan chuckled.

"Hands off." I warned him. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, I was in the neighbourhood, realised I hadn't stopped by in a while." His eyes twinkled at me; I knew instantly what he wanted. "C'mon Greg, whaddya say?"

"Not today Ryan. I'm really not in the mood."

"C'mon Greg . . . I'll make it worth your while." He smiled at me.

"Fine." I groaned, opening the door wider.

"Cute, I love the whole hair fairy look you got going." He chuckled, smoothing his fingers through my hair as he stepped through the door. Unlike Nick he was fair haired, slim build and only wanted to screw (A lot like Nick actually). But Ryan never wanted to talk to me.

Ryan grabbed my arm pulling me off to my bedroom, kicking the door shut with his foot then pushed me back to my bed while he stripped. I really wasn't in the mood right now, but Ryan continued completely ignoring my feelings . . . as usual. He climbed on top of me, invading my mouth with his bitter tongue as he slipped his hand beneath my boxers. "Not in the mood Greg?" He asked disappointed.

"Sorry . . . I'm tired."

"Big guy been wearing you out?"

"He's straight. We're not together." I assured him.

"Um hmm." He smirked, stripping me of my t-shirt, scoring his tongue down my chest then below my boxer's waistband. "Fuck sake Greg, what's up with you?" He shouted angrily.

"You can still do it."

"With you as flat as a pancake? You know I like you to cum on me!" He shouted. "What's up with you?"

"Nothing, I'm not in the mood. Maybe you should go?" I suggested, pushing him off me.

"Fucking little shit." He spat at me, grabbing his clothing from the floor. I rolled my eyes, dropping back to my pillow as the front door slammed. _He's such a drama queen! _I groaned angrily.

I was already in a mood now he made it worse.

* * *

**Please Review, let me know what you think :D**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two:**

"You are such a jerk Nick!"

"You kicked me out, now you're yellin' at me coz I stayed out all night?"

"Yes!" Starla shouted back. I rolled my eyes, standing less than ten feet away from the arguing couple. It had been going on for . . . 45 minutes encounting; I rolled my eyes at my watch. Nick dragged me out of bed on my day off to come and get the rest of his stuff with him. Why I had to come is beyond me. My ego was still bruised from Ryan calling me a 'fucking little shit.' Granted it wasn't the worst name he's called me over the years, but it still hurts my ego.

"You arrogant bastard!" Starlas muffled voice suddenly screamed. I blinked my eyes a few times, realising I must have spaced out as they had moved the argument upstairs, I hadn't even noticed they had left I was so tired. I leant against a doorframe behind me, listening to the shouting and banging upstairs. This really wasn't the right environment to bring a child into, but I wasn't about to speak up or I'd be pulled into it . . . again!

I walked through the downstairs of the house, realising I hadn't been invited over here in a while, they seemed to have decorated again and there were more family photos everywhere. Some of them I recognised as Nick's family, the others must have been Starlas. I recognised her mother and sisters from the wedding; she seemed to have lots of nieces and nephews too. Not like my house, there's only pictures of me.

I jumped hearing a loud crash from upstairs, along with more shouting voices. I dropped heavily onto the couch, relaxing back against the soft cushions. I could sleep here forever, it was so much comfier then my battered old couch. In some ways this was the perfect family home. "You're such a Pig Nick!" _Minus the inhabitants of it. _I rolled my eyes glancing at one of their wedding pictures on the wall. They looked _almost_ happy. In no way the perfect couple though.

Starla works in the Victim's Service department; he cleans up victims crime scenes. Starla hates sports; Nick loves his A&M team. Starla slept with Warrick, Nick's best friend and he doesn't know it and Nick slept with her best friend Tracy; three days after they returned from their honeymoon.

Now that I think of it, they're more alike than I thought.

"That's it, go back to one of your whores, I'm sure they'd be happy to take you in." Starla shouted, following Nick back down the stairs.

"I didn't see anybody. You kicked me out so I slept on Greg's couch." Nick shouted back.

"Is that true?" Starla shouted over at me.

"Yes." I jumped off the couch, patting the cushions back to life again. "He stayed on my couch all night . . . although technically he was working all night at the lab, so he was on my sofa all day. Not that's he's a lazy..."

"Greg." Nick did the throat slit signal to me, telling me to shut up. I nodded pretending to zip my lips shut. "I didn't sleep with anybody Star, you gotta believe me. You kicked me out, so I went over to my buddy Greg's apartment and he let me sleep on his couch. That's all."

"That's all? Is that supposed to make me feel better?" She shrieked at him. "Just get out, I will send you the divorce papers."

"What? Divorce papers? Are you outta your mind? Why would you say that?" Nick shouted. I saw it coming, but clearly he didn't.

"Nick . . . this marriage isn't going to work. I'm getting rid of the baby."

"You can't!"

"I've made up my mind Nick." She folded her arms across her chest, giving him a blank stare. "I don't wonna bring up a baby with you."

"You selfish stuck up..."

"Look at the time." I shouted cutting him off. "Lunch time, who's up for pizza? My treat?" Nick and Starla stared at me with raised eyebrows and wide eyes, making me very nervous. "Well . . . I'll be in the car." I turned towards the door, heading out towards the car before I blushed bright red in front of them. It wasn't until I reached the car that I remembered I came with Nick and he had the keys.

I dropped to the pavement, hugging my knees to my chest. I hated listening to arguments. It reminded me of when I was a kid, listening to my parents constantly arguing all the time. My dad was constantly out at work, my mother thought he was cheating on her and they were always arguing. It drove me crazy. I couldn't wait to leave for college.

"You're such a pig!" Starlas voice shouted from the house. I looked round seeing they had moved the argument to the front porch. I would suggest marriage counselling, but they'd probably bite my head off for that. Nick threw a box of his stuff into the back of his truck then opened the driver's side door.

"We'll talk about this later." He shouted at Starla.

"We won't need to because I'm still sending you the divorce papers."

"Greg, get in the car." Nick shouted at me. I climbed to my feet walking round to the passenger side door. "You're crazy Star."

"Well you're a fucking man-whore." She retorted, storming off into the house.

"I think my marriage is definitely over." Nick said climbing into the car.

"Really? Coz I am not sensing that." I joked getting an evil scowl from him. I decided to keep my mouth shut, pulling my seatbelt on for the drive back to my apartment.

"She's a cold stuck up Bitch!" Nick suddenly shouted. "Why would she do that?" Nick looked at me confused when I didn't speak. "Greg, you can talk now."

I unzipped my lips making him smile, rolling his eyes at me. "Which part?"

"Terminating the pregnancy for starters."

"Well Nicky, don't bite my head off, but I don't think that's the right kind of environment for a child to grow up into." I shrank in my seat from the Texan's sinister glare. I zipped my lips shut again, staring out the window as he drove us home.

* * *

"Greg." I jumped looking round at Nick stood behind me. He was wearing running shorts and a white t-shirt with a v line of sweat from his neckline. I pulled the I-Pod buds out of my ears, placing my book down on the coffee table.

"What?" Nick pointed towards the door. I watched open eyed as Ryan walked in. "Oh." Nick walked off down the hall to the bathroom leaving me with Ryan.

"Don't look too happy to see me Greg." He said sarcastically, walking towards me to sit on the coffee table. "Reading up on old classics?" He asked looking at the book.

"What do you want?" I groaned, leaning back against the sofa cushions.

"You know what I want Greg." His baby blue eyes twinkled at me. I tapped my fingers on the arm of the chair, looking up at him, listening to the shower water down the hall. I bit my lip thinking a moment then nodded.

"Not here though." I huffed. He smiled, grabbing my wrist, pulling me to my feet. I grabbed my keys and coat on the way out, being pulled into the elevator with him. "Why me?" I asked curiously as the doors closed.

"Why you what?"

"Why of all the guys you've been with . . . why me?" I asked again. He looked at me and smiled wider.

"Because you're special Greg. You're gorgeous, funny . . . and unique."

"How come you only want me for sex then?" I asked, stepping out of the elevator at the bottom floor.

"Because boyfriends never works out. I've had too many, and it never works out. C'mon, we'll go to my place." He led me out to his car, driving back to his place in silence. The whole way there I was constantly thinking about Nick in his running shorts. I loved the view of him when he came back from his run, course he didn't notice though. He's completely clueless.

Ryan pulled me up the stairs once we arrived at his place. This time, he didn't take me to the couch, nor the bed, but off towards the kitchen, grabbing a beer each from his fridge. He placed the beer in my hand, watching my surprised reaction. "What?"

"Nothing." I shrugged. "Five years of knowing you and not once have you offered me a beer."

"Oh. Well do you want it?" I flipped the lid off with my thumb, taking a large mouthful. He smiled then kicked off his shoes and coat, walking off to the bedroom. His apartment was open plan, when you're on the bed you can see the entire apartment. The only door is off to the bathroom, which he rarely ever lets me use, unless I'm really desperate.

"So . . . what did you wonna do?" I asked, walking towards the bed where he was sat watching me. He patted the bed beside him seductively. I walked slowly towards him, watching him set his beer down on the nightstand. The mood was already set, the lamps were on low, covers turned down with a couple pillows propped up at the end of the bed, along with some condoms and lube very deliberately displayed upon the nightstand.

Ryan pulled me closer by my belt loops, setting my beer down beside his. He crawled back across the bed, pulling me towards the middle of the bed with him. "Are you ready?" He purred against my neck, softly nipping and sucking.

"Yes." I gasped. He rolled our bodies so I was underneath him, lifting my shirt, tossing it over his shoulder. His hands explored my bare chest, reaching my belt as he joined our lips for one of his bitter rough kisses; teeth roughly scraping against my lower lip then nails digging into my hips as he ground our hips together.

"Close your eyes." He whispered against my ear. I did as instructed, hearing his clothing hit the floor then his coarse chunky fingers slipping my jeans and boxers from my legs. He works in an office so I don't know why he lets his skin get so flaky and rough. It feels like being touched with sandpaper.

Ryan straddled my thighs with his own nakedness, running his rough digits across my skin. With my eyes closed I could almost imagine it was Nick on top of me. I felt his mouth on my neck, chest, stomach, arms, thighs then groin. I kept my eyes firmly closed, arching my chest slowly up and down off the mattress. Each gentle lick kicking my body into overdrive, I had to fight for my control that little bit longer as the feeling of pure ecstasy tingled through my body, speeding up with his motions. My whole body warmed, silently vibrating as I came in his throat.

I heard the familiar spit in the waist basket then the swish of beer in his mouth, before he placed a kiss to my jaw line, softly nibbling on my lower lip.

"He'll never love you like I do Greg." He rasped as the lube's plastic cap popped open in his hands.

"Who?" I snapped my eyes open to look up at him.

"Nick Stokes . . . he'll never love you like I do." He repeated.

"He doesn't love me."

"Yeah right." He laughed sarcastically. "Didn't you see how hurt he looked when I walked in?"

"He's not gay though."

"Doesn't have to be gay to see you." Ryan whispered in my ear.

"Wait." I placed my hands on his shoulders, pushing him away. "I don't wonna do this."

"Oh C'mon Greg." He moaned, frowning at me angrily. "I'm being all nice to you and shit then you bail before we even get started."

"You're faking being nice to me?"

"No." He badly lied. "What did I say wrong this time? Maybe we should just have a no talking rule during sex?" He suggested, trying to force himself on top of me again.

"No." I scrambled off the bed fetching my clothing. "How about a no sex rule?"

"Greg!" He moaned, crawling to the edge of the bed. "What is your problem? I didn't force you into this. You wanted this."

"Maybe so . . . but I don't want you." I pulled my jeans on fastening them around my waist.

"What's wrong with me?" He squealed like a girl. "I always give you want you want, and it is what you want Greg. I never force you into this. C'mon, I'll do anything you want . . . just don't go." He pleaded with his baby blue eyes.

"What do you mean he'll never love me like you do? You love me?" I asked surprised. He sat on the bed, biting his lower lip then shrugged. "That's nice."

"Wait! Don't go." He ran after me, stopping me from leaving his apartment. "I like you Greg. I told you before; I'm not looking for a relationship."

"I am . . . why did you say it if you didn't mean it then?" I probed, folding my arms across my chest.

"Okay . . . I guess I do kinda love you. When I'm looking for some fun, I only ever go for you now."

"That supposed to make me feel better?"

"I guess not . . . see this is why I'm not looking for a boyfriend. It's too much work." He huffed, gripping handfuls of his blonde hair. "Why do you always come over when I ask you then?"

"Because..." I bit my lip trying to think of an answer, but I really didn't have one.

"See, you're using me just as much as I'm using you." He pointed out. I walked back towards his sofa, dropping heavily to the cushions. "Are you okay Greg?"

"Uh huh." I nodded, without looking up at him.

"You really love Nick don't you?"

"I do . . . I have, for a long time." I slumped my head in my hands, running my fingers through the spikes in my hair. I heard Ryan rustling around in the kitchen; I looked up seeing he was wearing sweat pants now, fishing out a tub of ice-cream from the freezer. "What are you doing?"

"All you need is ice-cream." He shouted.

"Ice-cream?" I asked confused. He walked back towards me, handing me a spoon then opened the tub of cookie dough ice-cream, placing it in my hands. He sat down beside me, putting his feet up on the coffee table.

"Go on, eat it. It makes you feel slightly better." He smiled at me. I looked at him then stuck a spoonful of ice-cream in my mouth. "Why don't you tell Nick how you feel?"

"He's getting a divorce, baby on the way and I have no idea how he feels about me. I don't wonna lose him as a friend." Ryan folded his arms across his chest, leaning back against the pillows. "Were you burned by one of your boyfriends? Is that why you don't want a relationship?" I continued to prob.

"There's a reason gay marriage isn't legal Greg, it doesn't work. Guys are all jerks, my sisters were right."

"Is that it? You were gonna get married?" I asked. He glared at me then took the tub of ice-cream from my hands, taking a mouthful himself. "You were?"

"Yes okay . . . it doesn't work out. Trust me, I'm older and wiser then you, I know this stuff."

"So who was he?"

Ryan glared at me, giving out another heavy sigh. "You're so annoying Greg." He rubbed his eyes then turned to look at me. "His name was Luke, we lived together as roommates for a while . . . then we got closer, both of us were pretending to be hetro, much like you and Nick. Then we kissed, things picked up from there . . . we were gonna get hitched, but he left me for his ex-girlfriend, who he's now married to with four kids. There, happy now?" He asked me then climbed to his feet to grab his beer. "Same thing will happen to you Greg." He shouted from the fridge.

"Nick might be different." I hoped. "How long did you know Luke for?"

"Before we kissed?" He dropped onto the couch beside me again. "About three years."

"I've known Nick for five years. Do you think he really likes me?"

"You should see the looks he gives me whenever I come over." Ryan smiled at me. "Does he at least know you're bisexual?" I shook my head. "You might wonna tell him, unless he already knows. I'm sure if he knows you're into guys . . . he might feel more comfortable to tell you about him . . . if he is gay."

"Five years and this is the longest conversation we've ever had." I laughed.

"Don't get too used to it . . . you know I hate this touchy feely crap. I mean this in the nicest possible way Greg . . . but you're a lotta work. You don't want me to be your boyfriend do you? That's not why we're..."

"No . . . as much as I like you Ryan, I like Nick much more." I smirked, patting him on the shoulder.

"That's a relief." He slumped back against the sofa, glancing at the clock above the television screen. "We'll do this for twenty more minutes then we get to do something I wonna do."

"Done." I agreed with a wide grin. "Do you think I'm a jerk for using you?"

"I use you too, but you're in love with Nick using me. So yes, you're a jerk."

"So are you." I retorted, shoving another mouthful of ice-cream in my mouth.

"Why am I a jerk?"

"If you don't get your way you always call me names..."

"Like what?" He shouted at me.

"Loser, prick, little shit, bastard..."

"Okay." He cut me off. "I may have said a few of those to you, but you are annoying. You're worse than chicks. I'm sorry Greg, you're looking for a relationship and I'm looking for sex, we're not a match. I'd only end up breaking your heart."

"I know." I dropped the ice-cream tub to the coffee table. "But you're the only one in this city, or my life that I can actually talk about this stuff."

"Great." He sighed sarcastically. "Maybe you should find a girl to talk to, they're better with their feelings, better than me anyway."

"Bare with me here." I turned to face him on the couch. "You have an insight into the gay world." He frowned at me curiously. "Be honest with me. Do you want me because you like my personality, or my body?"

"Mostly . . . if I'm bein 100 percent honest with you . . . I'd say your body."

"So you don't like my personality at all?"

"Well you're kinda bitchy . . . it'd be just like having a girlfriend to date you. No offence."

"None taken." I leant back against the sofa beside him, taking another swig of my beer.

"You're not gonna cry are you?" He asked biting his lip.

"No. I asked for your honesty. I wonna go home though."

"What about me?" He protested. "I listened, I did the talking thing. You can't just leave me."

"I'm gonna need a few more beers in me." I polished off the one in my hand then grabbed the one from him.

"Sex with me can't be that horrible."

"I meant to drown out the thoughts that you don't actually like me."

"I like you Greg . . . I'm just not in love with you." I pulled him to his feet, heading off to the bedroom where I finished off the other two beers left on the side.

"Are you sure about this Greg?" He asked. I nodded handing him back the lube and condom. "Now I feel like I'm taking advantage of you."

"Tough having a conscious huh?" I chuckled. "Don't worry, I want this too."

* * *

I stumbled through the front door, clicking the door shut behind me then leant against the door, closing my eyes. "You know I used to do that when I was a teenager." I snapped my eyes open to see Nick sat on the sofa. "It doesn't work as well in your apartment since the front rooms right by the door." He chuckled.

"Used to do what?" I asked, chucking my keys on the side.

"Stay out all night then show up in the mornin' like that." He chuckled again, climbing to his feet. "You look exhausted Greg and you stink of booze."

"Really?" I sniffed myself feeling my head pounding.

"Maybe Warrick and I are wrong about you. You do know how to let loose." He chuckled, walking round to the kitchen. "You want a coffee or just the aspirin."

"Both." I stumbled towards the sofa, dropping heavily to the cushions. Nick soon returned with a coffee and aspirin in hand. "Thank you." I half smiled, chuckling back the aspirin with a sip of the coffee. "Nick . . . do you like me?" I groggily asked.

"Like you? How?" He asked frowning at me.

"Me, do you like my personality?"

"Yeah . . . why?" He asked still looking at me funny.

"Apparently people don't like me . . . they only like me for my figure," I put the coffee to my lips, trying not to reveal too much information.

"I like your personality G. I think you're funny . . . smart, the lab wouldn't be the same without you." He smiled at me warmly. "You didn't sleep with whoever said they didn't like you for you did you?" I sheepishly nodded. "Way to bruise the ego G."

"Why do you sleep with so many women?" I suddenly blurted, unable to stop myself.

"How can you tell I have?" He asked looking at his clothes.

"So you have?" I asked. He nodded still checking his clothes. "There's a bite mark on your collar bone." I pointed out making him blush. "You say you want to work on your marriage, but you're still sleeping around?"

"I thought you hated Starla?"

I nodded. "I do, but I also believe in loyalty. Hypothetically speaking here, if I was dating you and found out you were screwing around with all these other women, I'd dump you in a second."

"Okay. That was brutal." Nick leant back on the sofa, folding his arms across his chest. "When's the last time you were in a loyal relationship then G?"

"When I first moved here . . . for about 5 months."

"That's the longest relationship you've had?" He asked surprised.

"No, I dated . . . one person for a whole year in college. You can't count Starla anyway; you slept with her best friend after your honeymoon."

"I told you to take that to your grave." He laughed, poking me in the side.

"And I will." I set down my coffee, giving him a cheeky smile. "Along with every other dirty little secret of Nick Stokes, seriously I have enough to write a book now." I teased.

"You wouldn't dare."

"Who says I haven't already started?" I giggled, climbing to my feet. Nick tried to grab my wrist, chasing me as I ran round the other side of the couch. "You should read it, it's pretty riveting stuff." I teased with a wider grin. "For instance your girlfriend in college that called your manhood Snoopy." Nick jumped over the back of the sofa trying to grab me, but I wriggled away, putting the round dining table between us. "Or even that you wear briefs because you like the feeling." I chuckled, watching a wide grin spread across his face. As he moved round one side of the table, trying to catch me, I moved round the other, keeping us apart. "I especially love the chapter where your Highschool girlfriend made you wear her pink panties."

"I really regret tellin' you all that stuff." While he was round the back of the table, I ran back towards the couch. Nick caught me, crashing our bodies to the couch, lying face to face with him on top of me. "You promised me you'd never tell anyone."

"I haven't." I beamed a smile up at him. "You can trust me Nicky." I loved the feeling of Nick's strong body on top of me. He didn't seem to notice how long he was staring into my eyes until the phone rang. He awkwardly climbed off me, answering the phone.

"Stokes . . . Mrs Sanders . . . he's right here." Nick handed the phone over to me then walked off to the kitchen. I watched him trying to avoid eye contact with me then pressed the phone to my ear.

"Hello?"

* * *

**Please Review, let me know what you think :D**

** A/N: I don't usually like writing stories from first person point of view. Greg's parents in this one are very different from my other stories and I made Greg a little bit more wild too. A ****CUTE little teasing moment between the boys here too.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three:**

The lube coated tip of a finger slipped inside of me ever so gently, making me gasp instantly. "Yeah, you like that?" His voice rasped against my ear, a pleased smirk in his voice.

"Yes." I gasped, arching up off the mattress. "Take it slower." I instructed, he nodded doing as I said, watching me gasping again and again in gratification. He softly pressed butterfly kisses to my chest, slowly adding a second finger.

"Can I do it now?"

"You're really not a patient guy are you?" I glared at him. "If you don't care about your partners pleasure then no wonder you can't keep a boyfriend."

"Hey I can keep a boyfriend . . . I just don't one want." I glared up at him angrily. "Okay, I'm sorry. I'll keep going." He gave me a soft smile then added a third finger, making me gasp louder.

After a few more moments I gave him a nod. "Okay now . . . but don't force it." He nodded grabbing the condom from the bed beside me. He tore the packet open with his teeth; rolling it up his hardened length then rubbed enough lube on, lining up with me. He slowly eased himself inside, gently rocking his hips to go deeper. He softly growled as my body enveloped him perfectly, his hands gripping my hips slightly.

His moans and growls made me shudder slightly; feeling him deeper inside of me warmed my body head to toe with excitement. I felt something different, rather than before when his aim was to get in - get off - get out. He had more passion for his movements this time around. He still wasn't perfect, he still couldn't love me and he still wasn't Nick. Right here I realised I'm such a hypocrite. I've been getting down on Nick for settling with his relationship with Starla, while I'm doing the exact same thing with Ryan. I'm not in love with him, I'm settling.

"You know this isn't very good for my self esteem when the guy I'm screwing spaces out." Ryan said, looking down at me annoyed.

"Sorry . . . I was thinking. Keep going. I'll pay attention this time."

"Forget it." Ryan pulled out of me, collapsing on the bed beside me. "Other than me boring you to death, it was okay right?"

"Much better." I smiled at him.

"Why won't you tell Nick you love him?" He asked curiously, rolling to his side to look at me.

"I don't think now's the right time to tell him."

"But everything you've told me about him, it's pretty obvious he wants you. I think he's very deeply closeted with padlocks on the door. He probably doesn't even realise that he loves you."

"You really think so?" Ryan gave me a firm nod. I glanced up at the time then back at Ryan. "Aren't you gonna kick me out?"

"Right, I was thinking about it." He chuckled making me smile. "Do you have plans with Nick?" I shook my head. "Awesome, pizza it is." He went to climb off the bed, but rolled back to me, pressing a kiss to my forehead.

"What was that for?" I asked surprised.

"I don't know." He shrugged climbing off the bed to pull some boxers on then went to grab the phone. I leant up on my elbows watching him curiously. He wasn't pretending to be nice to me anymore, he really _was_ being nice. Before he'd of never let me stay on the bed while he ordered us some breakfast, it used to be a pat on the back, 'thank you very much' then kicked out the door while he showered.

Ryan ordered our pizza then returned to the bed beside me. "So you keep coming over here straight after work huh?" He asked me curiously. "You must really like the things I do to yah?"

"Do you not want me to come over?"

"I don't mind." He smiled, crawling back towards the pillows to prop himself up. "I love seeing you every morning before I go to work."

I quickly rolled over to face him. "You're not falling in love with me are you?"

"Relax Babe; I just respect you more..."

"You didn't before?" I asked shocked.

"Sure I did," He nervously gulped. "I just thought of you as a sex toy before . . . but now you're kinda like a friend."

"No wonder you can't keep a boyfriend." I groaned, reaching for my clothes.

"God I'm such a fucking loser! I can't say anything right! Greg please don't go. I'm not falling for yah; I just like having you around." He crawled across the bed, taking my hands in his. "I don't have any gay friends; you're the first guy I can actually talk to about this stuff. You should know by now I have verbal diarrhoea. I didn't mean anything by it okay? Please stay babe."

I looked up into his sparkling baby blue eyes then nodded. He smiled then propped up the other pillows for me to lean against. If I ever did somehow get Nick to fall in love with me, my relationship with Ryan would really complicate things.

_What have I got myself into?_

* * *

I walked the long way home, kicking up the dirt with my feet in the brisk morning air. Straight after shift I went round to Ryan's place without telling Nick. I wondered if he even noticed or cared, _maybe he's just banging another slut in his bedroom. Yeah right he's trying to work on his marriage! _How does he expect his marriage to work out when he's still sleeping with other women? They only split for three days and he already bedded four women.

I stepped into the elevator, leaning sleepily against the wall as I rode all the way up to my floor. _Maybe he's a sex addict? Or just really depressed._ As the doors slid open I caught a glimpse of Nick kissing a redheaded babe with really long legs. _Leaning towards the sex addict theory._ I held the elevator for her, watching a deer in headlights expression form on Nick's face as he saw me exiting the elevator. _Did he not expect me home? I live here too you sex craze manic!_

"Mornin' Greg." He smiled as I stepped through the door.

"Why are you so happy?" I groaned dropping heavily to the sofa, flipping through the post on the coffee table. I put my feet up on the sofa, giving out a wide yawn. I was completely exhausted after a long shift then slightly better sex with Ryan this time that didn't leave me sore. I looked up realising Nick was staring at me. "What?"

"Are you mad at me Greg? You haven't talked to me in days." Nick lifted my feet off the sofa so he could sit down. "Did I drink all your coffee or somethin'?"

"Nope." I tossed the post onto the coffee table looking up at Nick through my long lashes.

"Then why are yah givin' me the cold shoulder G? What'd I do to you to deserve this?"

_Turned my apartment into a sex shelter? _"Nothing . . . I'm not giving you the cold shoulder . . . I'm just tired." I smiled at him, leaning against the back of the sofa. "So did you get the divorce papers through yet?" Nick shook his head. "Do you think you'll ever get back together?"

"I don't think so G."

"Do you want to?" I asked curiously. Nick shook his head again. "So you're going back to dating whores?"

"She wasn't a whore." Nick defended.

_Her skirt was three inches long and her double D chest was hanging out for all the world to see! _"You don't know her name do you?" I chuckled. Nick smiled shaking his head at me again. "She squeal when she popped?"

"No, she was a quiet one." Nick smirked. "How come you know everythin' about my dates, but you never tell me anythin' about yours?"

I shook my head then sighed heavily. "Ask away."

"Who have you been seein' lately?" He leant on his elbow against the back of the sofa looking at me. I nervously bit my bottom lip, looking right back into his eyes. "You embarrassed to tell me?"

"No . . . how do you know I've been seeing someone?"

"Because we leave work at the same time, but you don't come home for another hour or two. You must be seein' someone, and you're never hungry so you must eat with them too."

"Disadvantages of living with a CSI." I smirked at him with a wide grin. "I'm not exactly . . . seeing someone. They're not looking for a boyfriend either."

Nick raised his eyebrows at me. "So what? You're screw buddies or somethin'?"

"I guess." He continued to stare at me wide eyed. "Do I have something on my face?" Nick shook his head, awkwardly looking round at the room. I smiled to myself watching his cheeks flushing a slight pink shade. "Something wrong with that then?"

"No, I never thought you as the type to have a screw buddy. You're not in love with them are you?" I shook my head. "Things could get complicated with a screw buddy G. I had this one girl in college," I rolled my eyes at him, _another one of Nick Stoke's conquests._ Seriously he has a girl for every situation. "We were screw buddies then she fell in love with me, I had to break her heart coz I didn't love her back, I just wanted her for the sex then we couldn't see each other anymore, because things got so complicated between us."

"I'm not in love with them . . . and I'm not sure they know how to love."

He stared at me a moment then looked up at the clock. "Well I'm gonna go to bed . . . Night Greg."

_Is that jealously I sense there Mr Stokes? _"Good night Nicky." He smiled at me then climbed off the sofa, walking down the hall to his room. As his door clicked shut I leant back against the sofa with a wide grin on my face. Even though nothing was going right and I was afraid Ryan was falling for me, I couldn't help but smile at the fact Nick bails when I mention love.

* * *

"So how is it living with Greg?" Sara asked Nick, unaware I was in the room.

"It's nice livin' with a guy, after livin' with Starla for 3 years it's actually a relief. He doesn't care if I leave the toilet seat up, towel on the bathroom floor and he cooks with no complainin'." Nick chuckled; still unaware I was at the door behind him.

"Perfect setup." Sara chuckled. "Think you'll make an honest man out of him?"

"Cute." He frowned at her sarcastically. "Do you know who Greg's seein'?"

"Greg's seeing someone?" Sara asked with a smile on her face as she could see me.

"Yep, and he's bein' all secretive about it."

"Not jealous are you Nick?" Sara laughed.

"No." He blushed. "Why would I be jealous? You're the one that should be jealous, that boy loved you since the moment he saw you and you wouldn't give him the time of day. Bet you're regrettin' it now he's taken, huh?"

"I'm not regretting it and I'm not jealous." She smiled at him.

"Jealous about what?" I asked, making Nick jump.

"Greg." He smiled surprised. "We were just talkin' about the case." He nervously spoke, walking round the table to look at the evidence on it. I gave Sara a smile, joining them round the table as we went over what we had collected so far.

* * *

I knocked on Ryan's door again, anxiously waiting for him to answer. As soon as he opened the door, I gave him a wide smile. "I've got it." Ryan looked at me wide eyed with confusion. "I know how to make Nick admit he loves me." I said walking into his apartment.

"Nice to see you too." He said sarcastically, kicking his door shut then dropping to his couch. "So . . . what's this master plan genius?"

"I make a secret date with him. Valentine's day is coming up, when he goes wherever I pick and sees me . . . he'll know."

"Okay Greg, I've tried to be supportive, but I'm gonna have to tell you the truth. That plan is so dumb babe, it'll never work."

"Why not?" I asked surprised.

"If he goes on this secret date you pick and sees you, he'll think it's a joke or something." I dropped to the sofa beside him, putting my feet up on the coffee table. "Greg, why don't you try asking him how he feels, instead of doing it in huge steps?"

"But that would be too easy." I chuckled. "What if he rejects me then our friendships ruined?"

"What about us? We had sex first then the friendship later."

"Nick's an old fashioned boy. You don't like him do you?" Ryan shrugged not really giving me an answer. "Sometimes he gives me hints that he might like me then the next minute he's telling me about his latest conquests and I just wonna kick him out. I can't believe I live with a total man-ho sometimes. He has no respect for these women he's screwing, he doesn't even like them . . . yet they line up at the door to screw him."

"He notes enviously."

"Shut up." I scowled poking him in the side.

"You're just a little green eyed monster, Babe." He chuckled. "You know every day I let you come over here and talk about Nick constantly, and it doesn't bother me as much as it should coz I enjoy your company."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome . . . now can I go back to sleep. You may just be getting off shift, but this is my bedtime and it's a Saturday."

"Sure, do you want me to go?" Ryan climbed to his feet then shook his head, taking me by the hand off to the bedroom. He tossed my jacket onto the chair by his bed then ran his hands beneath the fabric of my t-shirt. He joined our lips for a heated bitter kiss, collapsing our bodies together onto the bed.

"Ouch." I winced. "You almost threw out my back."

"Sorry . . . lemme see."

"No." I firmly held my t-shirt down, staying face to face with him.

"Why don't you ever let me see your back?" He asked sounding annoyed.

"Because it looks horrible." He popped my jeans open, pulling them down to my knees, pushing them the rest of the way with his foot.

"Let me be the judge of that." He rasped against my neck, softly nipping at the skin.

"You don't really wonna see them."

"Let me see them." He climbed off me, pulling my t-shirt off my head then watched me reluctantly roll over. "Holy Shit!" He lay down beside me, tracing one with a chubby digit. "Do they hurt?"

"No . . . not any more anyway."

"How longs it been?"

"Nearly 2 years."

He ran his hand down my back, staring at the scars that patterned my back. "Maybe you don't have the perfect figure after all." He joked; I rolled over frowning at him. "I was kidding babe. They don't look so bad. You're still gorgeous Greg." He slid my boxers off, straddling my thighs again. Then joined our lips, holding my arms down with a firm grip as he slid his tongue deeper into my mouth. He rolled our bodies again so I was on top then reached for the lube, slipping his fingers inside of me while I was sat on his hips. "You like that babe?"

"Yes." I gasped.

"Now ride me." Ryan ordered. He withdrew his fingers and lifted me, rolling a condom up his length. He slicked himself up then lifted me up, lining me up with his shaft. I slid down his hardened member, taking his full length inside of me.

I braced myself with my hands on Ryan's chest as he began to thrust into me, sending jolts of electricity up my spine. Ryan held my hips as I rocked on his shaft slowly beginning to build up speed.

I could tell by Ryan's expression that he couldn't take the slow pace any longer; he rolled me onto my back without losing his seat in my narrow passage. I was flexible enough to raise my knees to my chest, gaining him full access. He was driving hard now, pounding into me, sweat dripping from his hair, tracing a shining path over his pale faced skin, continuing to thrust until his body shook with excitement.

We both came together, shaking as the boil of ecstasy washed over us.

Ryan rolled off me, arching his chest up and down off the bed heavily breathing, trying to come down from his high. I lay flat against the bed, feeling exhausted. Ryan crawled back on his elbows towards the pillows. I weakly rolled off the bed, gathering my clothes from the floor.

"You can't come over tomorrow, my mom's visiting." Ryan shouted after me. "I'll see you Monday if you want."

"Okay." I grabbed my coat off the chair then walked off out the apartment, heading home for some sleep again.

* * *

I silently stepped through the front door, hearing heavy breathing coming from down the hall. I tossed my keys onto the side, kicking my shoes off in the hall as I tip toed towards my bedroom. At first it sounded like noises of pleasure, but then I heard desperate cries of 'no' and 'help me'. I pushed Nick's door open, seeing him thrashing about in the sheets in a panic. I couldn't just leave him to his terror; I had to wake him up.

"Nicky, Nicky." I softly shook him, trying to hold his flailing arms down. "Nicky! Nicky!" I shouted louder, but still no response. I knelt on the empty side of his bed, giving him another shake. "Nick! Nick! Wake Up!" Nick's eyes snapped open; he reached out for me like I was an intruder then realised it was me. He panted heavily looking round the room while his body trembled, sweat dripping from his forehead, scoring a line down his perfectly tanned face.

"Nicky you okay?" I whispered softly. Nick nodded, putting his forearm across his eyes. I watched his breathing beginning to slow and his arms calming from their trembling.

"What are you doin' in here?" He removed his arm from his eyes to look up at me.

"I heard you screaming."

"Shit!" He wiped the dampness from his face then looked up at me again. "Sorry I woke you."

"No, it's okay, I just got in." I went to crawl off the bed, but Nick grabbed my wrist holding me in place.

"Wait! Can you stay a minute?" He asked in a vulnerable child like voice with big puppy dog eyes. _How could I turn that down?_ I nodded sitting back on the bed beside him. It was weird to see Nick so vulnerable; he was always so strong and brave. He walked out of the hospital on his own two feet, returning to his life like nothing had happened right after we rescued him.

I admired him for that.

Nick's body still quivered from the terror his dream had put him in, more than anything I wanted to hug him, but I didn't think he'd be comfortable with it since he was topless in bed. A single tear rolled down his cheek as he stared up at the ceiling, trying to calm his breathing. "It's okay Nicky." I whispered softly, lying on the bed beside him with a few inches between us. "You're okay now Nicky." He nodded covering his hands over his eyes, wiping the tears that threatened to fall. "Let's take your mind of it. Do you have plans for tomorrow?"

"Day off . . . you're workin' right?" He panted heavily in a vulnerable voice.

I nodded. "Yep, you planning on doing anything for your day off?"

"Not really. I might do the laundry if you have anythin'?"

"Sure, I'll leave it out before I go."

He gave me a soft smile as his breathing returned to normal. "Thanks Greg."

"You're welcome." I watched Nick getting into a comfier position again. "Don't go away okay?" He asked in a sweet vulnerable voice, looking back at me.

"I won't." He gave me a smile then softly began to close his eyes, trying to get back to sleep again. I couldn't help but stare at the amazing sleeping form before me. He looked so peaceful and beautiful and he wanted me to stay. _Can't think too much into it though_, he's in a vulnerable state after all. I told myself not to fall asleep as it would be weird if we woke up together, especially as I roll and move a lot when I sleep, but my eyelids felt so heavy and Nick was already softly snoozing beside me. Before I knew it I drifted off into dreamland, desperately trying to keep my eyes open, but they stayed glued shut.

* * *

I opened my eyes looking around the room, realising I was in the wrong room. I stretched out then looked down at the arm draped around my waist. I bit my lip turning to the sleeping form beside me. _Oh Shit! _He was lying on his side, right up against my body with his face very close to my shoulder, I could smell his musky breath and it really wasn't helping matters. I carefully tried to lift the arm off my waist, without waking Nick, but as I tried to move Nick began to softly stir. This was my biggest fantasy to wake up in his arms, but this was extremely inappropriate and completely the wrong time.

I lifted his arm again, easing myself off the bed then placed his arm back on the empty space, I tried to scramble off the bed without disturbing him, but as Nick gave out a soft moan, rolling to his back I fell to my knees, crashing heavily to the floor.

"Ouch, Shit!" I winced angrily as Nick's floors were hardwood.

"Greg? You okay?" Nick crawled to the edge of the bed looking down at me.

"I'm fine." I awkwardly smiled. "Sorry, I fell asleep. So did my legs." I chuckled making him smile.

"You didn't break anythin' did you?" I shook my head, climbing to my feet, stumbling slightly as my dead legs hit the floor.

"I'm fine, you want coffee, I can go get us some coffee..."

"G, breathe for me." Nick smiled sitting on the edge of his bed.

"I'm breathing." I smiled, stuffing my hands on my hips.

Nick's smile spread wider. "I'm not gonna hit cha for doin' somethin' I asked Greg."

"Okay." I sighed in relief.

"Thanks for stayin' with me. In that coffin I was alone . . . it helps havin' someone with me."

"You're welcome. Don't worry, I won't tell anyone." I smirked with a wink.

"Good, I won't tell anyone you suck your thumb either." Nick smirked back.

"I do not." I protested, thinking I hadn't sucked my thumb for years, _like since college._

"Yeah you do." He laughed. "I woke up a couple of hours ago and you were suckin' your thumb." I blushed with embarrassment. "Relax, I'm not gonna tell anyone. You know tons of secrets about me anyway." _I just figured out another secret too_, if he woke up a few hours ago, why didn't he wake me to get me off his bed and why did I wake up with him lying right beside me at the edge of the bed with his arm draped across my waist?

The plot thickens...

Or maybe he just rolls when he sleeps too. _That sucks! _Either way, I couldn't stop thinking about it all day at work. Then back at the apartment, every time I looked at him, I tried to study his expression, trying to tell if he truly felt anything more than friendship for me.

"Hey G, I'm goin' out for the night so don't wait up." He called from the kitchen.

"Where are you going?" I asked curiously, clicking the TV off.

"I'm takin' Starla out for dinner." He smiled, pulling his jacket on.

"What?" I asked completely shocked. "Why?"

"She's my wife..."

"Wife that's giving you a divorce." I remarked at him. I suddenly realised I sounded a little jealous so I kept my mouth shut. _Shit! I hate it when Ryan's right._

"She's had a change of heart. I'm not movin' back in with her G, I'm not stupid, but she wanted to talk." He smiled at me, grabbing his keys off the table. "I'll see yah later." He winked.

"Bye." I groaned. _Great! _I sighed heavily, throwing the remote angrily. _I don't think Nick has any real feelings for me_, it's not like he slept with me anyway, so I don't know why I'm so attached. _I'm pathetic. _Nick's a straight ladies man, there's no chance in hell he'd ever want to be with me. Like Ryan said, _I'm too much work._

* * *

**Please Review, I hope you're enjoying it.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four:**

"Oh Nick!" I groaned covering my eyes as he pulled the curtains open, allowing the sunshine to pour into the room hurting my eyes.

"C'mon G, get up. You said you'd meet your mom half an hour ago; she's been callin' non-stop thinkin' somethin' awful happened to you." He shook me again. "Greg c'mon."

"That was today?" I asked rubbing my eyes open.

"Yeah G, you made plans the other day. C'mon get up!" I leant up on my elbows giving out a wide yawn. Nick smiled looking at me.

"What?"

"Little visit from the hair fairy there G." He chuckled, ruffling my messed hair softly. I dropped back to my pillow, rubbing the sleep from my eyes again. "Greg, don't go back to sleep." He poked my chest through my pyjama top making me giggle. "You ticklish G?" He laughed continuing to poke me as I squirmed.

"Stop it." I giggled pushing his hands away. _Why does he persist on touching me when I'm in bed?_

"You gonna get up then G?" He chuckled, threatening to poke me again.

"I'm getting up." I sat up, running my fingers through my hair. "So how'd it go with Scarla?"

"Star-la." Nick chuckled. "She's keepin' the baby. She wanted to discuss the custody rights; her father wants to include it in the divorce papers."

"You want custody rights over an unborn fetus?" I asked shocked. "Planning your kids future before it's even born?"

"Don't most parents do that?"

"Most parents plan colleges or prep schools, not custody rights." I corrected.

"Maybe my kid can go the same place his uncle Greg went." He smiled at me. "Do all Stanford boys wear those blazers?" He grinned wider.

"You remember that?" I asked embarrassed. At the forensic conference ten years ago my mother made me wear a blazer to make a good impression. I shook Nick's hand while I wearing it and he seemed to notice me a little bit more than the others.

"Like I'd forget." He chuckled. "You were actin' like I was your hero or somethin'."

"You were living my dream." I beamed a smile up at him. I was acting all weird around him because I was a nineteen year old horny teen, just discovering my sexuality and he was by far the hottest guy I had ever seen. "I still can't believe we ended up working together though."

"I know, small world after all." He chuckled then tapped his watch. "C'mon your mom will be waitin'."

"Make sure you take a paternity test before you sign anything." I warned him, climbing off my bed.

"You think she cheated on me?" He asked shocked.

"Well you cheated on her . . . so don't act so surprised. Have you ever had a loyal relationship Nicky?" I asked grabbing some clean clothes from my closet. He leant against my door frame with his arms folded across his chest.

"Yes . . . but you really don't have time to talk because you have to go before your mom calls again. C'mon get a move on, you should know to never keep a lady waitin'."

"Like I'm gonna take datin' advice from you." I remarked pulling my pyjama top off in front of him.

"That was a little harsh."

"Well I wouldn't go to a monk for sex advice either." Nick stared at my bare torso, biting his bottom lip. "What?" I grinned. The look on his face was absolutely _priceless!_

"Nothin' . . . I'll see yah later then." He turned to walk out the door, clicking it shut behind him. _Okay that was a little harsh. _I threw myself back onto the bed, covering my hands over my eyes. "Greg! Don't go back to sleep!" He shouted from the front room.

"I'm not . . . I fell." I badly lied hearing him snickering. I sat up removing my pyjama bottoms; quickly getting dressed then gave my hair a quick comb over, walking off towards the kitchen to see Nick reading through the newspaper. "So do you think you and Scarla were brought together because you're both as disloyal as each other?"

"Stop talkin' and go." He ordered with a smirk. "I'd never keep my mother waitin' this long."

"Course not coz you're a ladies' man." I smirked.

"You might be too if you actually showed up on time for stuff." He rolled the newspaper swatting me over the head. "If you're not gone in less than 30 seconds, I'll have to drag you there myself." He chuckled. I pulled my converse trainers on then grabbed my coat. "Lucky you're only meetin' your mother." He smirked looking at my outfit.

"What you don't like the look?" I grinned.

"Your hairs all messed, you're wearing a t-shirt that looks like it was dragged through paint and your jeans are all ripped."

"That's my fashion, bogan." I chuckled.

"Did you just call me bogan?" He asked confused.

"Yeah, it means someone who lacks knowledge about culture, fashion and the modern world."

"You think you're so smart Sanders." He laughed going to hit me with the newspaper again, but I ducked out the way. "Go on, get out you little shit, you don't wonna keep your mommy waitin' any longer."

"Aw wonna catch up on your nap time grandpa?" I teased.

"You asked for it." He rolled up the newspaper trying to swat me over the head again. I laughed pushing him back then managed to escape out the door. "I'll get you when you get back Sanders." He shouted through the door.

"Make sure you take your Viagra first grandpa." I teased then legged it towards the elevator, quickly pushing the doors close button as he came running towards me. "Too slow!" I chuckled as the doors slid shut. _Anyone who saw us would think we were boyfriends. _I grinned to myself, leaning against the wall of the elevator. It's so fun to wind him up, _and he doesn't even know I'm flirting with him._

* * *

I snapped my phone shut, cancelling another call from my mother as I was right outside the restaurant where we were supposed to meet. I walked through the crowd of people waiting for a table, spotting her sitting in a booth by herself with a worried look on her face. I walked towards her, stopping in my tracks as I saw Ryan sat with an older woman. I was hoping she was his mother, (not that I was jealous) but they looked nothing alike. She had long curly brown hair, while he had short blonde wavy hair.

"Gregory." My mother shouted, frantically waving her hands around so I'd see her. Ryan looked over as he heard my name called. I went to make a quick exit bumping straight into a waiter, crashing plates of seafood to the ground, alerting the whole restaurants attention.

"Greg, are you okay?" I looked up to see Ryan helping me to my feet.

"Who are you? That's my son." My mother asked the strange man helping me to my feet.

"Well I-I know Greg." He nervously stammered.

"How?" The woman he was with shouted, stuffing her hands on her hips. _Talk about awkward moments!_

"Um..." Ryan looked nervously between me and the woman behind him. "He's a friend . . . Mom can I talk to you alone for a minute. Nice to see you Greg." He smiled. I waved watching Ryan ushering his mother out of the restaurant then turned round to my mother.

"You're nearly an hour late Gregory." She scolded checking her watch.

"I was asleep . . . sorry! What was the big emergency to have lunch anyway?"

"Well I have a hairdressing appointment in a few minutes. So I'll just tell you up front." I looked at her waiting for the answer. "Your father and I are getting back together."

"What? Why?" I asked completely shocked.

"You know most children would be happy their parents are getting back together." She chuckled.

"But you've been separated since I was fourteen and officially divorced for eight years now."

"Oh that's the other thing. We're getting married again." She pulled an envelope from her purse, placing it in my hands. "I'll talk to you about it later. That's your invite with a plus one." She pecked a kiss to my cheek giving me a wide smile. "See you later sweetheart." I watched her walk off out the restaurant, leaving me with the angry waiter.

I gave him a half smile then flicked a prawn from my shirt sleeve. _Here I thought we were going to eat lunch, not wear it._

"Greg!" I spun round to see Ryan waving to me. I stepped over the mashed up plates of food on the floor, following Ryan out the restaurant.

"That's your mother then?"

"Yeah." Ryan sheepishly nodded. "She's going home now . . . you busy?" I looked at my watch thinking if I went back to the apartment now, Nick would think I bailed on my mother, and I needed to give him time to think about how he was acting around me lately. _Maybe with enough time to think he'll realise I'm being deliberately cute around him, so he'll realise he likes me. _"Greg?" Ryan tapped me on the shoulder.

"Not busy." I shook my head. He grinned wider leading me off towards his car.

* * *

"I thought you said your mom knew you were gay?" I shouted from my position on the sofa.

"She did, she took me to conversion therapy. She thought it worked so I can't have her meeting the guys I'm screwing." Ryan dropped beside me, handing me one of the beers in his hands. "Ever since I came out to her she's hated me. So I agreed to go to this stupid conversion therapy, check into P-FOX every month, pretending it cured me and I still get to go home for Christmas and thanksgiving with my family."

"That sucks; I thought your loved ones are supposed to accept you for who you are?"

"In fairy tales Greg." He chuckled. "That's also why I didn't let her meet your mother, because I knew as soon as she saw you, she'd figure it out."

"Why?"

"Coz you're exactly my type." He grinned at me, sliding his hand down my thigh. "And no offence, but you do look like a bit of a flamer..."

"Am not." I protested, removing his hand from my thigh.

"Are too." He laughed.

"Am not."

"I mean it in a good way babe. But my mother would be able to tell instantly . . . then she'd make me go to conversion therapy again. I hated it the first time round, I can't go through it again."

"So what? You're supposed to stay away from all men?"

"According to her, yes. And I knew your mom didn't know about you. So I couldn't risk them meeting."

"Thank you for that."

"You're welcome." He smiled clinking his beer to mine. "So that's the infamous Carrie Sanders, huh?"

"Yep." I leant back on the sofa, taking another swig of my beer.

Ryan slid his hand across my thigh again, nipping at my neck with his mouth. "What's up babe?"

"Nothing." I placed my beer on the coffee table then folded my arms across my chest. "My parents are getting married again." I huffed.

"Again?" He asked, sliding his other hand down my chest.

"They've been divorced for eight years. They never got on when they were together before." Ryan reached for the envelope beside me, pulling it open.

"They're getting married on Valentine's Day, and you got a plus one." He smirked holding the invite up. "Who you gonna take?"

"You want me to take you?" I asked looking up at him.

"No, I'm busy Valentine's day anyway..."

"Doing what?"

"You're not jealous are you babe?" He chuckled. "You're not my boyfriend, I _can_ see other people."

"Who are you seeing?"

"A guy . . . his names Michael, he's not as cute as you though babe." He smiled, softly kissing my neck. "Don't look at me like that. You know I see other guys."

"I know . . . I'm gonna go." I went to stand up, but he pulled me back onto the couch, straddling my thighs.

"Don't go Greg." He whispered, softly kissing me. He ran his fingers through my hair, deepening his kiss. "You're the only guy I'm seeing that I kiss..."

"But you don't love me and you don't want to be with me." I pouted as his hands continued to explore my body.

"Well neither does Nick." He retorted. "You think Nick's ever gonna give you what you really want?"

"Nick's my best friend."

"You're best friend that you're lying to. He doesn't even know who you're seeing while you see all his tramps walking out the apartment day and night. That's not what best friends do Greg. You tell me everything." He rasped, softly sucking on my lower lip, pushing his tongue into my mouth. He slid a hand under my shirt, caressing my stomach with his coarse fingers, pushing me down so my back was against the sofa.

"But do you ever listen to me?" I asked as whenever I was talking to him his hands were always on my body.

"Of course I do." He captured my lips again, sliding his hand over my crotch.

"You think he'll ever do this to you?" He pushed my t-shirt up my chest, popped open my jeans then slid a hand beneath my boxer's waistband, softly stroking me, making me gasp louder and squirm beneath him. "You like that don't you babe?" He rasped against my neck, biting at the skin. I hated when he did that, he didn't exactly have straight teeth and they were really sharp that he often drew blood.

"No . . . Stop!" I pushed him back, pulling my t-shirt back down.

"What'd I do now?" He groaned sitting on my hips.

"I can't be with someone that doesn't want to be with me."

"Oh Greg, C'mon . . . when did you care? You've always known what I'm like. What's with the sudden change of heart?"

"I have a little thing called self respect." I pushed him off me, scrambling to my feet.

"This was never supposed to be a serious thing Greg. We're just having a little fun, I never realised it meant that much to you."

"It didn't." I zipped my jeans up, fastening the belt around my waist again. "I just thought that we..."

"This isn't anything but sex for me Greg. There was never any we..."

"I get it." I snapped grabbing my coat pulling it on, avoiding eye contact with him. "I just thought you liked me."

"Don't get me wrong . . . I do like you Greg . . . you're just not that special." I clenched my teeth into my bottom lip, walking off towards the door. "You know where I am when you need me Babe!" He shouted after me. _Jerk! _He thinks I'm gonna come running back to him first. I give him a day tops before he's over my place, begging me for sex.

As soon as I hit the street a tear pooled down my face. Over the past few days I had felt like Ryan and I had gotten a little closer, but he was still the same old jerk and I let him hurt me again! Maybe Ryan was right, maybe relationships with two guys don't work out because they're not meant to. I've never got it to work before . . . and I don't know any gay couples that have stayed together, deeply in love.

I'd always just been a fuck, _never anything special. _Even if I did tell Nick . . . _I'd probably just be a fuck to him too!_

* * *

"Greg!" Nick shouted again, knocking on my door. "You've been hibernatin' in there two days straight. What's goin' on?"

"Leave me alone Nick. You're supposed to be at work."

"Yeah I know and you called in sick . . . again! There's nothin' wrong with you though, so what's goin' on?" He stood waiting for an answer. "I'm not leavin' until you open this door Greg." He pounded on the door again. "Greg! Open the freakin' door." I rolled out from under the covers, unlocking the door, before he broke it down, then dove back onto the bed as Nick walked in. I crawled back under the covers as he approached the side of my bed, pulling them up to my bare chest. "Greg, what's wrong with you man?"

"Nothing." I groaned grumpily, pulling the covers over my head.

"Then why aren't you goin' to work?" He pulled the covers away from my face, looking into my eyes. "I'm not goin' anywhere until you tell me what's wrong G." He sat on my bed, waiting for me to speak. "C'mon Greg, I tell you everythin', I trust you. I'd like to think you trust me too."

"I do trust you."

"Then tell me." I looked into his big brown eyes feeling tingles in my stomach. "If you trust me then tell me Greg."

"You don't wonna know my problems Nicky." I groaned.

"Yes I do . . . that's what friends do. We help each other with our problems. Greg I trusted you to lay on my bed with me when I had a nightmare . . . do you not trust me that much?"

I sighed heavily, unable to resist the Texans gorgeous puppy dog eyes. "Nobody wants me."

"What do you mean?" He frowned at me.

"I'm damaged goods, nobody wants me. I'm gonna be alone forever."

"You're only twenty nine Greg."

"Exactly, as soon as I hit thirty my prime years are over."

"You're a little young to have a mid life crisis Greg." He smirked at me, but I didn't smile back. "Did somethin' happen with this sex buddy of yours? Did they tell you all this stuff?" I sighed heavily giving him a slight nod. "I told you things could get complicated."

"You were right, I was wrong. Can we save the I told you so's?"

"Sure . . . so you're master plan is to stay in bed for the rest of your life?"

"Not exactly." I sighed.

"Didn't really think that plan through did yah genius?" He smirked. I rolled my eyes at him, shaking my head. "You know what you need?" He pulled his cell phone from his pocket, flipping through his phonebook.

"I'm not really in the mood for one of your whores for hire." I snatched his phone from his hands snapping it shut.

"You get kicked off the datin' horse you gotta get back on sometime G. The sooner the better. And I don't have whores for hire." He tried to reach for his phone, but I held it away from him with a firm grip.

"How many people have you slept with since Scarla kicked you out?"

"Star-la . . . I don't know." Nick rubbed the back of his neck trying to count. "Not that many." He tried to reach for his phone again, but I held my arm out to the other side of the bed where he'd have to lean over me to get it.

"I don't wonna go out with someone you've had sex with."

"That's nice G."

"I didn't mean it like that." I quickly corrected. "I want a relationship . . . not just a screw. No offence, it might work out for you..."

"You think I don't want a relationship?"

"You destroyed your relationship with Star-la." I retorted.

"Why do we keep havin' the same arguments about our relationships?" He asked with a wide smile on his face. "Warrick never cared what I did..."

"Well Warrick's married to a girl he keeps complaining about too."

"Are you jealous Greg?"

"No! Just you all have someone that loves you and you're throwing it away. I would kill to have someone who truly loves me."

"Is that it? You're down on love?" He asked curiously. "Greg . . . to tell you the truth. I've _never _been in love. I have no idea what it feels like."

"You're missing out on one of the greatest feelings in the world Nicky."

"Really . . . you know what it feels like then?" He probed.

I nodded looking up into his eyes. "When they look at you . . . you feel butterflies in your stomach, warm tingly feelings throughout your body . . . when they talk, your heart pounds on the surface of your chest . . . sometimes it even skips a beat, it's the greatest feeling in the world . . . or my personal favourite, when you look at someone . . . inside it feels like warm butter sliding down hot toast." He stared into my eyes a moment, biting his bottom lip. "Even a familiar smell, it reminds you of them instantly putting a smile on your face..."

"Are you gonna go on describin' it?" He chuckled.

"It's the greatest most beautiful thing in the world." I smiled up at him.

"How many times have you been in love then G?"

"Twice . . . first time wasn't true love though."

"And the second time?" He asked curiously.

"They don't even know how I feel." _And I'm looking right at him!_

Nick looked into my eyes then smiled. "Sara?"

"No." I laughed shaking my head. "I had a crush on Sara, that's different. You've really never experienced love?" Nick shook his head. "I feel sorry for you Nicky; it's the greatest feeling in the world, better then ecstasy." I licked my top lip in slow motion, watching Nick's reaction.

"Okay . . . you comin' into work?" He awkwardly climbed to his feet, heading for my door.

"I guess." I sighed heavily.

"Good enough." He laughed. "I'll see you there then G." Once the door clicked shut I smiled, throwing myself back against the pillows. _For a CSI he wasn't very good at reading people. _I chuckled. I just described my love for him right in front of him and he was completely clueless.

* * *

**Please Review**

**A/N: Not many people use the word Bogan anymore in different countries it means different things. It's a typical sterotype slang name for people who don't keep up with the fashion eg. Mullet hairstyles, old fashion trends and so on....**

**Other names for it might be:**

**England – Chav, Scally or Pikey**

**America – You might call it Whitetrash, Redneck, Hillbilly, Hick and so on....**

**I hope that explains that because my Beta didn't know what it meant either :D**

**Thanks to Tish for beta-ing**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five:**

"C'mon Greg." Nick pulled me by the elbow into the club. "The girls in here are really loose and wild."

"Oh joy." I mumbled rolling my eyes. Somehow he had convinced me to pry myself from my pillow to accompany him to one of his routine club runs for chicks. The way he explained it in the car he made it sound like a drive through for sex.

"What was that?" He asked turning to face me. I shook my head following him through the crowd of half naked dancers. _Do their mothers seriously let them leave the house like that? _Half of them looked like they were barely in their twenties, grabbing each other, rubbing against one another on the dance floor. _Whatever happened to true love? _I stared at the Texan in front of me, possessively dragging me by the elbow towards the bar. He really had no idea how much I loved him, I would jump in front of a bus for him if I had to, and he wants to take me out to pick up girls that just give it away in the most tackiest club I've been to in years.

The dance floor was black tile, being lit up by the rainbow coloured lights overhead. The walls were black, lined with more neon lights that hung low over the dimly lit booths. The booth seats themselves were black leather with black marble tables, decorated with a single faux black rose in a slim vase. The bar was black marble too with silver bar stools all the way along. _This place could really use some colour; that wasn't neon lights. _The bright glow of all the different rainbow colours started to hurt my eyes already.

"C'mon." Nick possessively pulled me towards the bar, ordering us up some drinks from the young bar tender sizing Nick up. _Not that I could blame him, _one look at Nick and you can't help but stare. _He's gorgeous!_

"Somehow this isn't making me feel better." I moaned, dropping to an empty bar stool.

"C'mon Greg, don't be such a grouch." He handed me my drink then looked round at the crowd. I looked at his gorgeous brown eyes scanning the crowd before him. He was like a tiger on the prowl for his unsuspecting prey. _Stop thinking about him. _I urged myself, trying to look away. All this thinking about Nick really wasn't helping my downstairs situation. Luckily I was wearing briefs and tight jeans so it didn't show as much.

"Nick I told you this wouldn't help." I groaned.

"Well its better then you sittin' in your room all the time. C'mon, you _can_ have some fun G."

"This isn't my idea of a good time." I leant on my elbow on the bar, glaring up at him.

"Do you wonna go back and sit in your room?"

"Yes."

"Well tough, you're out now so you might as well try and enjoy the night Greg. You never know, you might meet someone." He tapped me on the shoulder then walked down the bar to a very chesty blonde in a very tight red top, very tight. She clearly had a boob job but she might want to consider a tummy tuck too. _God!!! I'm doing it again! _What's wrong with me? I'm so jealous, I've never been so jealous in my life. _Now she's feeling his bicep. Great!_

"Greg!" A familiar voice startled me, walking towards me plopping down on the stool beside me.

"Ryan." I groaned. "What are you doing here? This is a straight club."

"You think gay guys only hang out at gay clubs?" He smirked. "You're so young its adorable Greg."

"No I meant it's a straight club . . . No jerks allowed." I climbed off the bar stool, heading over to an empty booth, sinking low into the seat, but the asshole decided to follow me.

"So you here with Nick?" He looked round immediately spotting him down the end of the bar with the busty blonde. "Doesn't that really stick the knife in your heart Greg?"

"Like you care."

"Greg just coz I don't wonna be your boyfriend, doesn't mean I don't care about your feelings." He slid his hand across my thigh, sliding closer towards me. "I love those tight jeans you're wearing babe."

"Don't touch me." I pushed his hand off my thigh, climbing out of the booth to grab a full bottle of tequila from the bartender as he walked by. The one person I was trying to get over by staying in my room and Nick brings me out to a club he just happens to be in.

"Greg." He followed me through the crowd, stopping me from walking by pushing me back against the wall. "C'mon, don't be like this babe."

"Would you please stop calling me that!" I shouted angrily at him. "I'm not your babe."

"What should I call you then? Honey?" He nipped at the skin on my neck, pinning my body against the wall with his. "Hot lips?" He rasped, sucking on my lower lip. I turned my head away from his mouth, struggling to push him back.

"Did you come here for the drinks or were you following me?" I asked, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand.

"Following you actually. You can't seriously tell me you don't want me anymore Greg, just because I have a date with Michael."

"No because you're a jerk and I want someone who actually loves me." He looked across the club at Nick, he hadn't even noticed I wasn't there just chatting up as many girls as he could.

"You still haven't told Nick have you?" Ryan asked with a wide grin on his face.

"No . . . not yet."

"You gonna tell him before or after he bangs one of the hussy's?" He chuckled. "Too scared Greg? You know I could always..." He let me go, heading through the crowd towards Nick. I hustled through the crowd after him grabbing his arm then pulled him away towards a quieter part of the club. "If you don't want me to do it, you know what you have to do babe."

"You're going to black mail me into having sex with you now?"

"I never said black mail Greg." His mouth spread into a shit eating grin. "Do you want me to tell Nick you're head over heels for him?"

"Like he'd believe you."

"I'm sure he'd love to know what you get up to in your spare time with me though Greg." He grinned wider.

"You're such a jerk Ryan."

"I'm just getting what I want babe." He winked at me. "C'mon, my cars out back."

_Asshole! _I leant against the wall behind me watching Nick ordering a drink for a brunette girl that just joined him. I couldn't tell him right now and Ryan knew it. _I totally hate my life. _I chugged down a few mouthfuls of the tequila bottle in my hands then looked at Ryan stood beside me with a smug grin on his face.

"So what'll it be Greg?"

"I totally hate you, you know that?"

"I'm not in this for love Greg." He smirked.

"Fine." I sighed heavily looking over at Nick.

"Good choice." He smiled, pulling me towards the door by the forearm. I felt like I was going to be sick as he led me through the parking lot to his car. I could feel tears pressuring themselves to the surface as he pushed me down on the back seat, climbing on top of me.

* * *

Nick finally came home after four long hours. He looked surprised to see me sat on the couch, surprise which immediately turned to concern. "Are you okay Greg?" He sat on the coffee table in front of me, looking into my eyes. "Where did you go?"

"For a walk." I slurred, rubbing my eyes. I was surprised he even noticed I was gone as his tongue was shoved down big boob's throat half the night.

"How much did you drink?" He clicked the light on looking at my face. "Have you been cryin'?"

"No!" I belly laughed from the booze. "Did you have fun?" I asked trying to change the subject before I started crying again, I didn't want to appear weak in front of him.

"Was okay . . . what's up with you?"

"Nothing." I groaned, resting my head back against the sofa cushions.

"Then why are you sat in the dark . . . alone?"

"Because it doesn't have the same effect if I sit with people in the light." I joked making him smile. "Which one did you go home with then?"

"Almost the brunette."

"Almost?"

"She passed out." He chuckled. "Call me old fashioned, but I don't have sex with unconscious girls."

"You didn't catch her name?"

"Susanne or somethin'." He shrugged. I rolled my eyes at him, _so predictable. _"What about you?"

"I had a nice conversation with Dorris at the grocery store."

"The nosy clerk?"

"Exactly."

"What are you doin' buyin' groceries at midnight?" I lifted the bottle of tequila from between the sofa cushions. "Oh, gettin' drunk isn't gonna make you feel better Greg."

"It does trust me . . . and it numbs the pain a little." _Mostly the pain of Ryan using me and black mailing me. _I can't believe how low he's sunk. If I was as low as him I'd black mail him right back. My mother always said I'm too nice. "What are you staring at?"

"Nothin'." Nick looked deep into my eyes, as though he was looking directly into my soul. "You look so lost . . . what's wrong with you Greg?"

"Nothing." I insisted.

"There's somethin' wrong G..."

"No there's not."

"Greg, I know you . . . your eyes always tell your emotion."

"What are they telling you now then?"

He looked it my eyes with his, staring right into my soul. "You're troubled . . . scared even."

"How come you never look at me when you talk to me?" I suddenly blurted as he looked down to talk.

He rubbed the back of his neck, looking up into my eyes again. "I don't?"

I shook my head. "Do you not like looking at me?"

"Sorry, I don't realise I'm doin' it." He watched concerned as I took another large mouthful of tequila. "Gimme the bottle Greg."

"I still have half left." I pushed his hand away trying to chug the rest.

"Exactly." Nick leant over me, prying the bottle from my hands then twisted the cap in place. "C'mon, let's get you off to bed."

"I'm fine here."

"Bed's much comfier." Nick smirked, sliding his hands under my armpits to lift me from the sofa, practically dragging me down the hall to my room. He gently set me down on my bed as I couldn't stand then pulled my shoes off, setting them down beside the bed.

"I told you going out wouldn't make me feel better." I slurred. "Especially coz you ditched me."

"I'm sorry; I shouldn't have ditched you..."

"Damn right."

"I thought you said you didn't love this sex buddy of yours." He asked. "Is that why you're so down?"

"No . . . I don't love them." I sleepily crawled back on my elbows towards the pillows. "I definitely don't." I mumbled.

"Then why are you so torn up about this Greg?" He asked curiously.

"Coz now he's black mailing me." I groggily explained.

"He?" Nick asked surprised.

"She." I corrected, almost rolling off the bed but Nick managed to catch me, rolling me to the middle of my bed.

"Why's _she _black mailin' you?"

"I should really stop talking to people." I slurred, rubbing my eyes as the tears threatened to spill.

"You couldn't stop talkin' if you tried." Nick smiled softly, pulling the covers over me. By this point I could see about three of him stood over my bed. "I bet I could ask you anythin' right now." Nick sat on the edge of my bed, looking down into my eyes.

"No way, I'm a sealed vault." I slurred, beginning to feel sleepy.

"What do you think of my shirt?"

"It's a really horrible couple, but anything looks good on you."

"Uh huh, sealed vault huh?" He smirked at me. I heard his muffled voice as my eyelids heavily fell, forcing themselves down over my eyes. I couldn't really make out any more words he was saying, until they sounded closer, like right against my ear. "Who could break your heart Greg?" I felt his hand resting softly on my forehead as I fell asleep.

* * *

"Oh." Nick winced, watching me stumbling into the kitchen. "Usual hang over remedy?" He poured me a cup of my coffee, handing it over.

"Thanks." I used the kitchen counter to support my weight as he fished out some aspirin from the bottle for me. "What happened last night?"

"What do you remember?"

"Not a lot."

Nick chuckled shaking his head. "Well you got pretty hammered G." I threw back the aspirin with some coffee then went to sit on the couch. I ran through my mind, trying to go over what I said to him last night. I couldn't remember anything though.

Nick sat on the coffee table with his coffee mug in hands.

"What?" I asked nervously as he was staring at me.

"Why's this buddy of yours black mailin' you?"

"Shit! I told you that?"

"You mentioned it." He nodded. "So who are they and what are the black mailin' you with?"

"It's kinda private . . . something that makes my life that little bit more worse."

"What is it?" He probed.

"You don't understand the meaning of the word 'private' do you?" I chuckled. Nick shook his head giving me a frown. "Don't worry, I didn't kill anyone, it's not that private." I assured him.

"Okay . . . what exactly are they black mailin' you into doin' G?"

"Nothing." I sighed heavily.

"Why were you so upset last night?"

"I'm an emotional drunk."

"Okay." He sighed into his coffee mug.

"Okay? You never just say okay."

"Do you want me to continue askin' you?" He grinned at me. I shook my head. He was trying to use some weird reverse psychology on me. My mother always did it to me when I was younger. "Then accept my answer. If you don't wonna tell me . . . I understand."

"Good." I smiled back.

"I'm goin' apartment huntin' today." My eyes widened slightly, _I didn't know he wanted to move out._ "You wonna come?"

"Will you buy me breakfast?" I asked, beaming a wide smile up at him.

"Sure." He smiled back. "Go get dressed then, I'll take yah to I-HOP." I scrambled to my feet, jumping over the back of the sofa, heading off down the hall to my room to get changed. "You even get excited over I-HOP?" He chuckled after me.

"I love pancakes!" I shouted from my closet.

* * *

"Okay, I just want you to know we accept anyone of any race, gender, religion . . . or sexual orientation." The realtor smiled looking at me and Nick. _She thought we were gay._

"So..." I looked at Nick trying a joke. "Whaddya think about this place _honey_?"

Nick looked at me a moment, smiling back. "I don't know _muffin_, maybe we should look around more." The realtor nodded then walked away to give us some time to look around. _He called me muffin. _I sighed heavenly, having to bite my lip to suppress an excited dorky laugh.

"I prefer this one." I smiled to Nick walking round the large open planned apartment. "The first ones seemed more cramped . . . but this one's more open planned..."

"That's why they call it open planned G." Nick smirked at me, his nose buried in all the little booklets the realtor gave him.

"The walls and ceilings are really pale in this one . . . but a bit of paint." I ran my finger across the white wash wall. "Maybe green or blue and it would really suit you Nick."

"We've only looked at three so far G." He chuckled. "And this ones the most expensive." He said flipping through the brochure. I grabbed them from his hands, tossing them over my shoulder. "What'd you do that for?" He asked shocked as they scattered across the hardwood floor.

"You're supposed to look at apartments, not the booklets Nicky. You've had your nose in the books the whole time. You're not gonna live in them . . . you're gonna live in this place." I grabbed him by the wrist, pulling him to the middle of the apartment floor. "Look at this place Nicky. Look there's ceiling fans, massive windows, not that we get to appreciate the sun very much, but I'm sure you could buy some big curtains to close over them . . . and look at the skylight."

"There's a skylight?" He looked up seeing the large window in the ceiling, looking up at the clear blue above us. "Wow."

"See... didn't have that in the booklets did it?"

"It was probably on the next page." He smirked at me.

"You don't read a manual to experience a rollercoaster Nicky. You have to look at things." I dragged him to one of the windows, pointing to the view of the beautiful city outside. "Touch them." I raised his hand to the wall, running his fingertips across the coarse pattern through the centre of the wall.

"You are a so much better sales person." He chuckled, looking into my eyes.

"Can you see yourself living here?" I looked up at him, watching his eyes scanning across the apartment floor. I realised I was still holding his hand, quickly letting go and walking across the hardwood floor towards the kitchen.

Nick followed me towards the kitchen, watching me looking around in all the cupboards. "What are you doin' G?" He chuckled.

"Gotta know if there's enough space. This cupboard would be perfect for storing your blue Hawaiian coffee. The coffee mugs can go here . . . and look at this one." I pulled open the cupboard showing him the plate racks inside. "Oh and these little spice wheels." I spun it with my fingers. "You can hide those little whisky bottles in the back, so if you ever find yourself entertaining the most boring broad ever . . . you can secretly indulge yourself." I cheekily grinned round at him.

"I hope you don't drink when you're cookin' for me." He chuckled.

"No . . . I don't have a spice wheel."

"Oh nice!" He laughed.

"I meant . . . you don't bore me so I don't need to drink." I chuckled closing the cupboard. "So do yah like it?"

"It's okay." He sighed, looking round at the windows in the kitchen area. "I don't really like open planned apartments though."

I laughed rolling my eyes at him. "Next apartment then?"

"You don't mind doin' this with me G, do you?" He asked.

"No." I shook my head, secretly thinking 'yes' as I didn't want him to leave my apartment. "You're still welcome to stay at mine for as long as you like." I added.

"Thanks Greg."

"You're welcome." I shoved my hands in my jeans pockets, walking off towards the front door towards the realtor again.

"So what'd you think of it?" She asked us both.

"I think we're gonna keep lookin' . . . right honey?" He smirked looking at me. I nodded trying not to laugh then followed Nick down the stairs, heading out to his truck. "So where to now G?" I climbed into the truck, grabbing the newspaper to cross off the apartment we just looked at. The next one was addressed in Ryan's building so I quickly crossed that one off before Nick noticed.

"Here's one . . . a penthouse apartment with luxurious living space, professionally decorated with top quality furnishing . . . there's even a huge master bedroom with a sun terrace, master bath with Jacuzzi and walk in shower." I looked up to see a wide smile on Nick's face. "What?"

"Nothin'." He chuckled, shaking his head. "What's the address?" I held up the paper to him, pulling my seatbelt on as we drove off towards it.

* * *

"You know this place seemed better when you were describin' it." Nick smirked, pointing out the cracks in the bathroom tile.

"You should try the bed." I dropped onto the bed, hearing the loud squeaks of the mattress springs beneath me. "That's the sound of over sexed souls." I giggled, giving it another bounce.

"I'll be right at home huh?" Nick laughed walking into the bedroom.

"No, this place isn't really you." I sat up on the bed looking around. "Unless you're a porn star in your spare time . . . you'll never fit in here."

"Thanks." He laughed, folding his arms across his chest watching me.

"I meant that as a compliment." I climbed up off the bed, walking towards the closet to pull open the door. On the back of the door hung a large mirror, reflecting the sunlight from the window behind me. I also noticed Nick staring at me, stood in the corner of the room. _Good thing I wore my tight jeans._

"So... what do you think?" The realtor asked returning to the room. I pushed the closet door shut then looked round at Nick.

"Um... I'm gonna think about it. C'mon G." The realtor handed Nick a card then watched us walking out together.

"So next one?" I asked leaning against the side of Nick's truck with my hands in my pockets.

"Nah." He opened up his sunglasses, pushing them over his gorgeous eyes. _He looked like a movie star in those glasses._

"Nah? You done for the day?"

Nick nodded looking around then looked into my eyes. "You know, I kinda like havin' a roommate . . . if you still want me to be..."

"Definitely." I said as a wide grin spread across my face.

"You can kick me out whenever you like."

"Keep up the I-HOP breakfast runs and I might just keep you around." I grinned, climbing into his truck.

"You're on." He smiled back, climbing in beside me. "But you have to put up with my hick tunes." He smirked, slotting a CD in then selecting a specific track.

"What's this one called?" I asked curiously, wondering if he was trying to send me a subtle message in his own little way.

"Forever by John Michael Montgomery."

_I guess I'm just a little bit scared,  
I guess I'm not as strong as I thought;  
When I see you lying there,  
I worry about losing you.  
I used to think of only me,  
but that was long ago  
Now I find it hard to conceive,  
life without you . . .  
Baby I don't want to be the one to face this life  
all alone at the end of the day, when the sun goes down;  
I want you right here in my arms . . . forever.  
Every little smile, every move you make  
It's like a dagger to my heart took my breath away,  
all I ask is that you be mine forever . . . forever._

* * *

**Poor Greg's down on love.**

**Please Review, I hope you like it. Thanks so much for your comments so far :D**

**Thanks to Tish for helping me Beta.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six:**

"Do you want to know the sex?" The doctor asked Starla. She shook her head looking up at me awkwardly. She was wearing a paper hospital gown with her legs split open at the end of the table, a male doctor sat between them. _I'd feel awkward too!_

She came round to our apartment, originally looking for Nick, but found me instead. Apparently Nick had completely forgotten they were seeing the gynaecologist today; somehow I got dragged to the doctor's office with her, looking at _their_ baby up on the monitor.

I didn't tell Starla that Nick was out on a date with a woman though; she'd yell at me then Nick would yell at me for telling her too. _So like an idiot! _I agreed to go with her.

Everyone in the waiting room thought we were a couple, asking if we thought of names yet. _I thought of Narla for a girl and Stick for a boy! Yes I just combined their names together. Aren't I clever? _Starla didn't think so, but I got one mother-to-be laughing her ass off.

The nurse especially gave me a funny look when she saw no wedding ring on my finger. _It's the 21__st__ Century lady! Not everyone is married when they have babies now. _Not that we're together! _That's a horrible thought!_

I then had to wait while Starla got changed into her hospital gown, where one nurse commented 'I never let my husband see me naked either.' _Eww! Starla naked! _That's totally gross and an image I really didn't need. _What kind of friend is forced to imagine their friend's wife naked? _I already had to look at the inside of her cervix and uterus, _which was awkward enough. _I doubt even Nick's seen all that stuff, _and he's married to her!_

"So you kids thought of names yet?" The doctor asked us. _Eww! Now the doctor thinks' we're kids! _And together! We don't even look like we belong together. _You might wonna change professions there pal!_

"We're not together!" Starla hissed at him. "My snot nosed husband couldn't make it. Banging another slut no doubt!" _You're half right, he's on a date with one._

The doctor looked at me, giving me an eyebrow raise and half smile as if to say 'Lucky you!' You dodged that bullet, having a baby with a woman having mood swings this early in her pregnancy is no easy task. What he doesn't know is that this is her usual everyday mood. _One reason I'm glad I'm more into guys. I'll never have to go through this with one of them!_

"How far along is it?" Starla asked the doctor.

"I'd say about eight or nine weeks. You want a picture?" Starla nodded to him, returning her gaze to the monitor. I watched a tear rolling down her cheek as she looked at the blob on the screen. _It didn't even resemble anything that remotely looked like a baby._ But before I knew it she was grabbing for my hand, pulling me closer to comfort her, which is really weird because we never got on. Mostly because I was so envious of her marrying the gorgeous Texan, that and because she found me annoying. _I think most people did (do), but her especially._ But there she was, pulling me closer, almost hugging me as the doctor printed out the picture of her baby. _The picture looked worse than the one on the monitor. I could draw a better picture of a baby then that._

As he handed it over, she sobbed even harder, rustling around in her paper dress on the table.

"There, there." I softly patted her on the shoulder, not knowing why she was getting so emotional over a white blob on a small black screen. _And there it was again. _A picture of her cervix and uterus; right before my eyes. _I'd never get that awful image out of my mind! _This is worse than the time my mother told me all about her pregnancy with me. She showed me all the pictures, along with telling me all the gory details about her vagina tearing and the tremendous pain of crowning. _I'm so glad I'm a boy!_

* * *

"Greg! I got your six messages, what you couldn't wait for me to get back? I told you I was goin' out with Trisha today!" Nick shouted entering our apartment where I was sat on the sofa. I remained silent, holding up an envelope with his name on it. "What's this?" He grabbed it from my hands, sitting down on the coffee table as he pulled it open. "Is this..." He stared down at the little black square with various white lines across it.

"Starla came looking for you. Her doctor's appointment was today."

"Shit! I totally forgot about that . . . so she gave you this?"

"No . . . she made me go with her."

Nick looked up at me with wide eyes. "You? You two hate each other."

"Exactly." I chuckled. "She's eight or nine weeks pregnant . . . and that little speck there." I pointed on the picture. "That's your baby's heartbeat."

"Boy or girl?"

"Scarla didn't wonna know."

"Star-la." He chuckled rolling his eyes. "Wow." He stared at the picture again; I noticed a tear gently rolling down his cheek.

"Are you okay Nicky?"

"Yeah." He nodded looking up at me. "I've always dreamed of havin' a child . . . I thought I'd be happily married when it happened though." He chuckled slightly. "So she really asked you to go with her?" I nodded. "How was it?"

"Well the waiting room was full of fat pregnant chicks, tons of emotional people and screaming baby's, nurses that don't allow their husbands to see them naked and have no sense of humour. Oh and they all had these massively freakish large heads, the babies not the pregnant women or the nurses, although the one behind the desk did have a slightly too large head. Oh yeah and they had huge ears that didn't really look right on their faces, there was this one baby with its eyes really far back in its head, another was wearing this little Minnie mouse outfit and they're just staring at me. There wasn't much to read there either so I had to look round at the pictures on the walls, detailing a woman's vagina, cervix and amniotic sac, along with the baby inside of them. It was really gross. Every time I looked round at the pregnant women, I could imagine that thing growing inside of them. Gave me the creeps like something out of X-Files. You know the only good thing about pregnancy is the breast enlargement..."

"Greg!" Nick shouted cutting me off. "I meant seein' the baby on the monitor." He laughed at me.

"Oh that . . . that was weird. We could hear the heartbeat, it's really fast, but the doctor told us that was normal . . . then Star-la started to cry . . . we spent like an extra twenty minutes talking above her birth plans and everything." I said giving him a wide grin.

"So it was like a day at the theme park for you huh?" He laughed louder. "Did Starla say anythin' about me not bein' there?"

"Yeah, this is her saying this, not me. And I quote 'Tell that fucking asshole he's a friggin' jerk."

"Okay."

"And she called you a snot nosed husband in front of the doctor too."

"Okay. Thanks for goin' G; I'm glad you had fun." He chuckled looking up into my eyes.

"Fun? That place will give me nightmares." I cringed making him laugh harder. "I didn't really have a choice anyway. She really has a temper."

"Tell me about it." Nick scooted over to the sofa beside me, staring at the small square in his hands. "I can't believe I'm gonna be a father."

"You're gonna be a great father Nicky."

"Thanks G." He leant back on the sofa so our shoulders were just touching. "Sorry I shouted at you."

"I'm used to it." I smirked. "So how was your date with Trisha?" _Not that I cared, he only knew her 5 minutes prior to getting her number and arranging a date._

"Was okay . . . nothin' special." He shrugged with a heavy sigh.

"Why do you smell like vomit?" I suddenly noticed, turning up my nose. Nick looked at me with his eyebrows raised then sniffed himself.

"You don't miss a thing do yah CSI Sanders?" He chuckled. "I took her back to her place and she started chuckin' up."

"Not on you?" I cringed, moving away from him slightly.

"No, I gave her a can of sprite and the smell kinda lingered." He shoved me in the side playfully. "You're supposed to be used to these smells CSI Sanders, you smell rottin' corpses every day."

"Yeah, but I don't want them in my living room. You didn't sit on my sofa in your vomit clothes did you?" I climbed to my feet, pulling him up with me, inspecting my couch carefully.

"I didn't get vomit on my clothes." He chuckled. "You're such a neat freak G."

"Am not!" I protested. "I don't organise the knives and forks into different sections of the dishwasher." I retorted back giving him a wide grin.

"It's easier to empty it after."

"And you arranged my CD's, books and movie's into alphabetical order too."

"It's easier to find the one you want."

"Uh huh." I laughed. "You made my couch stink."

"I did not."

"Go shower, you stink." I ushered him away with my hands. Nick laughed rolling his eyes. "You better wash your clothes too."

"You can do that G; you haven't done the laundry lately. Make sure you turn the shirts inside out and clip the socks together so they don't get lost."

"Yes Mr Control Freak." I smirked getting poked in the ribs again.

"You smart ass." He chuckled, pulling his jacket off; tossing it into his bedroom then lifted his shirt off his chest on his way towards the bathroom. "Here." He threw his shirt to me along with his socks. "They don't stink!" He laughed as I cringed. "I'll toss you the rest." He stepped into the bathroom to de-cloth, _luckily! _I wouldn't be able to keep my eyes off him if he did that in front of me too. "Here." He tossed out the rest of his clothes with a towel wrapped around his waist. "Don't use too much soap either."

"Sir no sir." I smirked, heading towards the kitchen. _Greg! Hold it together. _I scolded myself, holding Nick's still warm clothes in my hands. I loaded them into the washing machine, along with the rest of the laundry, clipping his sock pairs together and turning his shirts inside out as requested. _I'm sure he makes me do his laundry, just to torment me! _The Texan's scents lingered in my nostrils as I closed the door. _I love that smell, _unfortunately a little too much though. Luckily he takes the longest showers in the history of guys, so I'd have time to deal with my little rising problem. _Imagining him in the shower though, really isn't helping!_

I spun round hearing a knock at the apartment door. I walked round the breakfast unit, looking through the spy hole at... Ryan! _What does that asshole want? _I reluctantly pulled the door open, watching a shit eating grin spread across his face.

"Hi Greg babe, what's up?"

"I'm not having sex with you again, so you can just forget about it."

"You are unless you what Nick to find out your little secret." He retorted.

"Fine, go tell him." I pushed the front door open wider. "Tell him I'm bisexual and in love with him. Tell him your black mailing me into having sex with you to keep this a secret. We'll see who he sides with shall we?" I shouted at him, feeling my hands starting to tremble, but for the first time I actually felt brave for standing up to him.

Ryan just stood there completely flabbergasted.

"See! Exactly . . . empty threats!" I shouted at him, grabbing for the door to slam it in his face, but he stopped me by grabbing my arms and stepping closer.

"Fine . . . I'll tell your mother you've been screwing guys!"

"You wonna play it like that?" I asked nervously. He nodded looking straight into my eyes. "Then I'll tell yours, you'll be back in conversion therapy before you know it..."

"And Carrie Sanders will lose her innocent little boy!" He shouted making me tremble again.

"You're pathetic!"

"So are you Greg." He shoved me back against the wall, making me wince slightly, pinning me back with his larger body. "You've got more to lose babe." He rasped, holding my forearms tightly against the wall beside me so I couldn't struggle.

"Nick's my best friend. He'll accept me no matter what."

"That's what you think. I lost most of my friends when I told them I was gay..."

"Ever think it might have been because you're an asshole-" He slammed my body into the wall again, smacking my head against it hard. I winced from the painful tingles rushing down my spine, looking up into his cold dark eyes.

"Watch your mouth, you fucking little shit!" He shouted making me tremble even more. I couldn't even move or defend myself; I was so scared, frozen to the spot over what he might do to me next.

Ryan looked down the hall as the shower water had stopped. "Meet me at my place after your shift tomorrow, unless you want everyone to know about you." He forced his lips against mine; pushing his tongue into my mouth then slammed me against the wall again, walking out the door, pulling it shut behind him.

I stayed frozen on the spot, leant against the wall behind me, still trembling slightly. I was so spaced out and shaky that I didn't even notice Nick coming out the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist.

"Greg!" He shouted, waving a hand in front of me. "Are you okay? You're shakin'." I nodded, clenching my teeth into my lower lip.

"I-I'm fine . . . I-I'm just tired." I stepped past him, walking off down the hall to my room.

All the victims I deal with on the job and I can't even help myself when I become one! _I really am pathetic! _I clicked my door shut then dove onto the bed, pulling the covers around me. _There's no way I'm going over there tomorrow. I have to do something!_

I stayed under my covers, curled up in a ball trying to think of something. I reached for my phone, dialling my mother's number, hoping she wouldn't pick up as I really didn't want to tell her what I planned on telling her. I had no idea how she was going to react.

"_Hello?" Damn it! _I groaned.

"Mom . . . I-It's me."

"_Honey!" _She cheered excitedly. "_You forgot to call me yesterday, I was just thinking about calling you to tell you off."_

"Jeez mom it's only February, I've forgotten what? Like twice . . . I can't always call everyday now, I'm almost thirty."

"_Whether you're thirty, forty-five or sixty, I still want to hear from you to know you're alive sweetie. You know how worried I've been since the lab explosion then what with your co-worker being abducted and stuffed inside a coffin. God forbid you ever take up a field position there. I doubt I'll ever be able to sleep at night again."_

I gulped nervously. "Yeah well, you can relax Mom. I'm not going in the field anytime soon, unless they really need my help I'm staying firmly planted in the lab." _Even though I've been in the field just over a year now. _"Mom . . . I really need to tell you something."

"_Of course, anything baby. Bare with me though, I'm just putting the shopping away so I'll put you on speaker."_

"Okay." I heard her rustling around through the shopping bags, wishing I could do this face to face, it might have been a little easier.

"_So what is it sweetie? And thanks for telling me you have a roommate by the way. At first I wondered why a guy kept answering your phone then I realised it's the same guy every time and he's there while you're on shift..."_

"Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you. I have a roommate now." I said sarcastically.

"_That's not funny Gregory. So who is he?"_

"Nick Stokes, he's a swing shift CSI level 3..."

"_Is that a field position?"_

"Yes, he's in the field..."

"_He's not encouraging you to go in the field is he?"_

"No mother. Believe it or not I can actually make decisions all by myself now. At the age of twenty nine I can actually pick out my own clothes for the day and food I want to eat."

"_Don't get cute with me smart ass." _She laughed, rustling some more bags around. "_You're not still eating those noodles and crap are you? I didn't teach you to cook for nothing you know."_

"Well for breakfast I had Nana's waffles, lunch a tuna sandwich and I haven't had dinner yet."

"_Gregory its almost half nine, you have to eat a few hours before you go to bed."_

"But I work night shifts and I've got the day off. I didn't want to mess up my sleeping schedule. Since I woke up at one thirty pm when I had my breakfast then lunch at five pm, I'm not exactly hungry to eat dinner yet." I rolled onto my stomach staring at the clock. I should have known trying to call and tell her one thing would be nearly impossible. I'd end up talking about everything she wanted to know before I even got to tell her what I originally called her for in the first place.

"_Okay, that's all right then." _She sighed in relief. "_Why do you have the day off then?"_

"Because Grissom gave me the day off. We're all over worked on overtime any way since we have less CSI's on the team now, what with Catherine, Warrick and Nick on swing shift..."

"_Who's on the night shift now then?"_

"Sara, Grissom and me..."

"_But you're not in the field."_

I gulped nervously. "I know . . . if you let me finish I was going to tell you Hodges, Henry, Bobby and the rest of the crew are still on night shift too."

"_So they only have two CSI's on nights and three on swing shift? Who on earth would think that was a good idea?"_

"That would be Ecklie. Grissom is trying to get everyone back on night shift. Since Nick's kidnapping he wants us all on the same team again." I rolled onto my back, staring up at the ceiling.

"_Oh okay . . . so what did you want to talk to me about sweetie?"_

_Finally! _I sighed. "Mom . . . I." I stared up at the ceiling, feeling my heart pounding in my chest.

"_Well spit it out Gregory, you're making me nervous. Is everything all right?"_

"No." I groaned, clenching my eyelids shut so my tears wouldn't roll down my cheeks.

"_Baby, what is it? Are you hurt? Is something wrong? I'll be over in a flash..."_

"No mom . . . I'm not hurt. I'm just a big emotional wreck . . . again!"

"_What's wrong baby? I hate hearing you hurting like this; please tell me what's wrong. You can tell me anything."_

"Give me a chance to talk then." I moaned. "I'm so pathetic mom. How can you be proud to call me your son?"

"_I am very proud to be your mother sweetheart. Has someone broken your heart? You always get down like this when they do? Who is it? I'll ring their neck for hurting my beautiful little boy. You always fall for the bad ones Gregory, the ones that break your heart, just like Sara Sidle, but did you listen to me? No, you thought you knew best and she completely rejected __you!"_

"Mother please! I already feel pathetic enough; I don't need you adding to the list!"

"_I'm sorry baby; please tell me what's wrong. I can come over if you like? I can easily free up my evening for you sweetheart."_

"What are you doing this evening then?" I queried.

"_Your fathers taking me out to dinner, but you're far more important than that. I'm grabbing my car keys and I'm off..."_

"No mom . . . you can't cancel on dad." I sat up on my bed, holding the phone to my ear.

"_Sweetheart, if you're down on love, don't give them the satisfaction of your tears. No one who chucks you or breaks your heart deserves you sweetheart. One day you'll meet the right girl, who really loves you for who you are. We all have to go through the shitty dates before we get to the right one. I dated so many jerks before I met your father..."_

"And he cheated on you breaking your heart too."

"_Yes then when I tried to date again I had my spoilt little boy messing it up for me." _She chuckled.

"They weren't good enough for my mommy."

"_Thank you sweetheart. But back to you, if you need someone to cry on I'll be right there."_

"Mom . . . what if I'm not into girls?"

"_Baby it always feels hopeless after you've lost love. It feels like the end of the world, but you will get over it..."_

"No mom . . . I mean." I rolled back to my stomach again, propping myself up on my elbow. "I mean what if I don't like girls?"

"_Oh honey, not all girls are like that, you will find the perfect girl who really..."_

"You really aren't getting where I'm going with this are you mother?" I rolled my eyes. "Mom, I've been attracted to guys and girls since I was thirteen . . . but lately . . . I'm more into guys." I pulled a pillow close to my chest, clutching it tightly. "Mom I'm saying I'm in love with guys . . . do you get that?"

"_Oh baby, I've been waiting for you to finally tell me for years. I have the P-FLAG website bookmarked in my favourites too. I've even been to a couple of meetings, I've never been really sure. So I never asked you, but I've always had my suspicions..."_

"Why didn't you ever ask me? You're always honest with me; more then I want you to be sometimes. Like you're menstrual cycle for example, you really can stop telling me about that..."

"_You're one to talk, Mr Hypocrite!" _She laughed slightly. "_You waited until you were nearly thirty to tell me something I found out years ago. I love you unconditionally honey, you know you can tell me absolutely anything. I'll only give you unconditional love and support for anything..."_

"Even if I were to become a field CSI?"

"_Except that! You can't put me through that much stress sweetie. I almost had a heart attack when you were rushed into hospital from that lab explosion. But back on point, if you really do like boys more than girls, I can accept that sweetheart, I'm not going to disown you over who __you love. How do you know for sure any way sweetheart?"_

"Because I'm completely, one hundred percent in love with a guy and I've never felt like this over a girl."

"_So have you . . . you know, done the deed?"_

"Most mothers wouldn't ask their children that."

"_I don't want details. Just please tell me you used a condom."_

"I've never had sex in my life without the use of a condom mother, so you really can stop asking me now." I assured her.

"_Oh God! You're not sleeping with Nick are you?"_

"No!" _I wish! _"No mom, he's just my roommate . . . although he would be a better choice than the guy I have been sleeping with."

"_Who is he? I'll ring his neck for breaking your heart."_

"I wasn't in love with him mom. He's a total jerk . . . that's sorta why I called you." I sniffed back my tears, clutching the pillow closer to my chest. "Mom, I have to tell you something, but I don't want you to freak out because I'm okay."

"_Anything baby." _My mother took a seat, holding the phone closer to her ear, listening to my panic breathing over the line.

"Okay . . . he's slightly older than me..."

"_How much older?" _She feared.

"He's only thirty six..."

"_Only thirty six? Honey I'm forty five, he's more my age range then yours."_

"Would you please stop cutting me off and listen to me?" I snapped at her.

"_I'll try, but honey, he's nine years younger than me and seven years older than you."_

"I know, I'm not stupid." I scolded her, rolling my eyes. "Can I tell you the rest now?"

"_Oh sure, go on."_

"Thank you . . . I've known him since I moved out here..."

"_You've been with him all this time and you never told me?"_

"No . . . he was a one night stand back then . . . we went to clubs together after that. It's only been more sexual between us for the past two years or so."

"_So you've never been with a guy in a boyfriend situation?"_

"No . . . not really." I sighed. "I'm rejected by both genders . . . no one wants to be with me. I'm the biggest reject in the history of rejects."

"_Sweetie don't say that. You just haven't found the right person yet."_

"I've only had one boyfriend and even he dumped me because I was annoying. Now I'm with the biggest jerk of all and I'm just a sex toy to him."

"_Please tell me he's clean."_

I didn't want to tell her I didn't know, so I stuck to the facts. "We always use a condom . . . but mom, what I really wanted to tell you is . . . I broke up our relationship with him . . . so he's black mailing me into sleeping with him now."

"_Oh honey!" _She shrieked, I heard her sobs over the line, making me cry more too. "_Black mailing you . . . how sweetheart, and please tell me you didn't give in."_

"Only once . . . he said if I don't sleep with him he was going to tell you about me . . . and my friends, along with the person I love."

"_Who is this son of a bitch?" _She shouted angrily. "_Tell me his name."_

"Mom, I'm not seeing him again . . . I'm going to tell everyone myself so he has no power over me." I held the pillow tighter, worrying how this conversation was going to go with Nick.

"_Well who do you love sweetheart? Why are you so scared about people finding out about you?"_

"Mom . . . not everyone accepts people for who they are. If Nick found out I was... he'd probably never speak to me again, let alone my friends at work or even my boss. If he tells them . . . I'll lose everything!"

"_Is that who you love? Nick Stokes?"_She pondered. "_Sweetie I'll still love you. I love you no matter what you do with your life, just please tell me the truth. I can't help you unless I know all the details."_

"Yes." I sobbed. "It's Nick . . . more than anything in the world."

"_Then who's this son of a bitch black mailing you?"_

"You already met him the other day. His names Ryan. Remember at the restaurant, he was with his mother."

"_What's his last name?"_

"Clark . . . Ryan Clark, please don't do anything Mom. I can deal with him myself."

"_But I have to help sweetheart, I can't bare hearing the hurt in your voice..."_

"I will sort it. I can do things myself mom..."

"_But your too nice sweetheart, you get that from me; it doesn't always pay to be nice."_

"Mom I'm sorting it right now. I wanted you to know first. I'm sorry I never told you about me and I hope you're not too disappointed in me."

"_Baby I could never be disappointed in you."_

"I meant over your dream of getting grandchildren."

"_Well there's adoption or surrogacy. Seeing you happy is far more important to me than anything in the world sweetheart. I won't interfere with this Ryan business, but if he lays one hand on you I don't know what I'll do. I'll never forgive myself if I allow you to be used and hurt like this."_

"Thanks mom, I love you."

"_I love you too sweetheart. Just promise me you're not going to have sex with this jerk again."_

"I promise, and I'll tell you if anything changes . . . or if I need someone to cry with again."

"_Do you need a hug too? Because I can be there as soon as I can to give you one."_

"No . . . I'm okay thank you. I just wonna cry myself to sleep now. Do I suck my thumb when I sleep?" I suddenly blurted.

"_Yes sweetie, you don't remember you're pacifier you had until you were twelve?" _She chuckled. "_I spent years trying to pry that thing from you. Why do you ask?"_

"Nick said I suck my thumb."

"_Nick's watched you sleeping?" _She asked shocked.

"Um... that's a long story for another therapy session. I'm gonna get some sleep now. Bye mom, I love you."

"_Don't hang up on..." _I snapped my phone shut quickly, dropping it onto the side then curled up under the sheets, clutching a pillow tightly. I felt slightly better after an emotional draining session with my mother, but I still had to tell everyone else so Ryan had no power over me.

* * *

**Please Review if you liked it :D**

**Thanks to Tish for beta-ing!**

**A/N: Greg's comments about visiting the doctor for the baby scan is almost a direct quote from my friend when he had to take his sister to one. He rambled about all the squicky pictures and freakishly looking babies. lol**

**Next chapters almost done, but its a little angsty for Greg. I'm trying to make it as reader friendly as I can. Just thought I'd warn you now in case you don't want to read it.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven:**

I opened my eyes hearing a loud banging echoing through the apartment. I wondered if it was my mother, angry that I hung up on her. I threw back the covers, stumbling out of bed, using the wall as a support as I shuffled down the hall towards the front door. Without even thinking I pulled it open, looking up to see Ryan stood in the doorway. I went to close it again, but Ryan slammed his hand into the door, pushing past me into the apartment.

"Isn't that the same outfit you wore yesterday?" He walked round to the kitchen, helping himself to a beer from my fridge. "Nick around?"

"I don't know." I pushed the door shut, leaning sleepily against it as I looked up at the time reading seven thirty am; I knew Nick was on call today so he might have been called in to work if it was a busy day. "You here to black mail me again?"

"Only if you refuse me. C'mon." He grabbed me by the hand, pulling me down the hall to my room.

"This is a whole new level of jerk even for you." I struggled against his grip, but he was a lot stronger than me. _Times like these I wish I went to the gym and worked out a little more so I could defend myself. _As he shoved me into the room, I crashed back against my bed, bouncing slightly off the mattress.

"I'm just getting what I want." He set down his beer then climbed on my hips as I tried to get away. "It will only hurt if you struggle Greg." I tried to push him off with my arms, but he took hold of them in a firm grip, pinning them either side of me on the bed.

"Black mailing isn't enough for you? Now you're going for rape?"

"I'm just going for you." He pulled some rope from pocket, sliding me up the bed towards the headboard, as he slid me, the weight on my body was lifted slightly with enough wiggle room to kick him in his junk, pushing him off the bed once my hands were released for him to cup his bashed in balls.

While he was writhing in pain, I used this opportunity to climb off the bed, running out my bedroom door. I ran towards the front door full speed, my head being slammed into the half open door from behind.

I dizzily fell into his arms, watching the door being shut.

"You're gonna pay for that you fucking prick!" He shoved me to the floor, holding my wrists together as he bound them, cutting off the blood supply to my fingers.

"No please." I begged, feeling completely helpless beneath him. "Please don't do this. Please!" He slid his hands down my body, unbuttoning my jeans then slid my jeans and boxers from my legs. I kept asking him to stop as I cried and struggled beneath him, but it only made him laugh harder as he forced himself into me. It felt like I was being ripped apart inside as he forcefully thrusted into me, over and over again.

I screamed and begged in agony for the pain to stop, but it was useless.

I wanted to die!

"Greg! Greg!" I heard a familiar voice shouting, shaking me slightly. "Greg! Wake Up!" I snapped my eyes open, thrashing my arms about trying to get free of the ropes. "Greg, it's just me buddy! It's just a nightmare!" Nick shouted.

I looked down at my wrists, seeing his hands were holding them, not ropes. My entire body was trembling as though electricity was surging through it and my clothes were soaked through with my sweat.

"Hey, it's just a nightmare Greg." Nick said in a much softer tone, pulling my trembling body into his arms. I violently shook against his chest, trying to pace my panic breathing. "Shh, it's okay. It's okay Greg." Nick softly whispered, smoothing his palms up and down my back. "Shh, you're okay."

His soothing voice and soft touch made me relax slightly. My breathing slowly returned to normal and the trembles slowly began to calm down, but my tears however continued to flow, soaking through to the Texan's t-shirt, but he didn't seem to care.

"Shh it's okay, it's okay." He whispered softly, rocking me gently in his arms. I closed my eyes, resting my head against him as he softly soothed me. Feeling his arms around me, his scents around me and his voice soothing me made me feel so much safer.

"Are you okay Greg?" Nick whispered softly, continuing to smooth his palms up and down my back.

"I-I'm okay." I trembled against him, his arms wrapping tightly around my body. He rested his chin on my head making me wince away slightly from where Ryan shoved me into the wall.

"Did I hurt you? Are you okay?" He panicked.

"No I'm fine." As he pulled back slightly he looked at my forearms.

Nick clicked on my bed side light, seeing the purplish bruises on each of my forearms in the shape of hands. "Greg, what happened?" He held one of my arms closer to the light, looking at the bruise pattern.

"I don't know." I lied, pulling my arms away from him, avoiding eye contact with him. I could tell Nick was looking at me suspiciously; he deals with victims all the time on the job. My bruises were an obvious clue to him as I couldn't have done them myself; my reaction to him finding them was an even bigger clue.

Nick gently put his arms around me again, softly smoothing his palms down my back again. "Wonna tell me what you were dreamin' about? It's usually me that has the nightmares." He whispered softly.

"It was nothing . . . just a bad dream."

"It didn't sound like nothin'. I thought someone was attackin' you the way you were screamin'."

"I'm fine..."

"Greg."

"Nicky please, just let it go." I snapped at him. He just nodded, sitting in silence again with me in his arms. I closed my eyes again, relaxing in his arms. His heart was pounding against my ear which was surprisingly soothing, sending me right off to sleep.

* * *

"Hey." Nick smiled at me as I walked into the kitchen. "I didn't know how you preferred your eggs, but my mom used to make this egg bake and it was delicious. I'm not that great at cookin', but it's pretty close." He dished out some of the eggs onto a plate, grabbed a piece of buttered toast off the bread board then handed it over to me. "You want coffee or fresh orange juice?"

"Nick . . . what is all this?" I asked confused, holding the plate of eggs in my hand.

"Breakfast . . . you not hungry? Or do you fancy some pancakes? I can whip up anythin' you fancy."

"Okay Nick, what's going on?"

"Nothin', just makin' you some breakfast, you don't have to eat it if you don't want it."

"I want it." I smiled, eating a fork full of the eggs on my plate; _he really wasn't lying about not being a good cook, these eggs taste like rubber. _I tried not to cringe in front of him as I swallowed down the rubbery tasteless eggs. _Ouch! Was that a piece of shell? _I winced as it scratched down my throat. "Mmm, that's delicious." I lied to not hurt his feelings.

"Thanks."

"Did you break something?"

"No why?"

"My roommate in college made me breakfast and coffee for the first time the day he broke my computer."

Nick smiled shaking his head. "No, I didn't break anythin' I swear." Nick looked at my arms seeing I was wearing a long sleeved t-shirt to cover the bruises up. "So coffee or orange juice?"

"Coffee's fine . . . thank you." I smiled at him, heading over to the dining table with my breakfast. Nick set down a coffee in front of me then went to get his breakfast and coffee, joining me at the table. He was still staring at me suspiciously when he thought I couldn't see him.

"So . . . what are your plans for the rest of the day?" I asked curiously.

"Nothin' really, I'm on call so I might just hang out here for the day. What about you?"

"I'm gonna go see my mom after lunch; she wants to go over some of the preparations for her wedding."

"Oh yeah," Nick chuckled. "She told me all about it when you weren't here. I can't believe you never told me your parents were divorced."

"It never really came up." I defended. "That and you never asked if they were together."

"I have asked about your parents."

"You didn't ask if they were together when you asked though." I smirked at him.

"Is that why you've been so down on me about bringin' a baby into a divorce situation then?"

I nodded taking a sip of my coffee; _at least he didn't screw that up_. "I know what it's like to be caught in the middle of fighting parents . . . it's not nice."

"So how do you feel now they're gettin' married again?" He asked curiously.

"As much as I love my mom and dad . . . they don't really go together all that well. I'm not sure how long they've been secretly seeing each other again, but they've been divorced for eight years . . . I think they might be rushing into this whole marriage thing again . . . but I'm not gonna ruin their happiness."

"I thought it's every kid's dream for their parents to get married?"

"If you still live with your parents, maybe. But not when your childhood was full of their arguing, throwing things, tears from both parties, the one weekend with dad . . . week with mom watching her crying because your dads in bed with another woman." I leant on my elbow, looking up at Nick. "I wished they could have stayed married and got along when I was younger . . . but watching my mom crying nearly every day for years, telling me my dad didn't come home because he was out at work all time . . . I don't want him to break her heart again."

"Would it be better if Starla did get an abortion?"

"I'm pro-choice for the record. It might be better . . . but some couples can make it work. Watching your dad kissing another woman then telling you to keep it a secret from your mom though . . . not such a good idea."

I finished off my breakfast, loading my plate, knife and fork into the dishwasher according to Nick's rules and regulations on dishwasher loading.

Nick leant on his elbow, staring into space in deep thought.

He finally finished his breakfast, walking towards me in the kitchen with his own plate. "So will you be home for dinner?" He asked, loading his own things into the dishwasher.

"What time?"

"You're workin' tonight aren't you?" He asked, leaning against the counter behind him. I nodded leaning against the opposite one. "Around six then?"

"It's a date." I teased, winking at him.

"Hopefully Grissom will be able to get us all back together soon, so we can be workin' at the same times too." As he spoke his phone went off in his pocket. "Stokes . . . okay, I'll be right there." He snapped his phone shut then smiled up at me. "See yah for dinner then G." He winked, running off to his room for his things. "Bye Greg."

"Bye." I shouted after him, smiling to myself as he walked out. The only thing missing was the kiss goodbye and the 'I love you's.'

I suddenly realised I couldn't remember him leaving my room last night. The last thing I remembered was being in his arms as he softly smoothed his palms up and down my back. _Did he fall asleep with me? Or did he creep out after I was asleep? Maybe he stayed with me all night?_

I jumped hearing a knock at the front door.

I walked round the breakfast bar, pulling the door open to see Ryan stood in the doorway, my body immediately tensed up and quivered, recalling my dream from the night before. "What do _you_ want?" I nervously asked.

"You didn't come see me." Before I could close the door, he stepped through it, pushing it shut behind him.

"Why are you doing this to me? What did I ever do to you to deserve this?" I asked, being backed up into the wall where he shoved me yesterday.

"You rejected me . . . I want to feel a connection . . . lately, I only feel it with you. Being inside of you makes me feel alive babe."

"Well I told my mom and she didn't reject me . . . I'm gonna tell Nick and all my friends too, so you can't black mail me into sleeping with you anymore."

"I'm really sorry babe." He said softly, sliding his hands beneath my t-shirt.

"You're not sorry." I pushed his hands away from me, looking up into his eyes. "Saying sorry means you've registered that you did something wrong and you regret it, but _you_ don't, you're just trying to sleep with me again. You couldn't give a toss about me; I'm just sex on a stick to you." I crossed my arms over my chest, avoiding eye contact with him as he continued to stare at me.

"I do realise I've done something wrong and I do regret it babe." He leant closer, sucking on my neck with his lips. I pushed him back, ducking away as his arms tried to grab me, heading towards the living room to put the coffee table between us.

"You don't regret it at all! You're here for sex and that's all." I shouted at him, wishing I had someone or something to defend me.

"I'm here for you Greg." He advanced towards me making me really nervous. I stepped over the coffee table, heading round the back of the couch, he lunged himself over it, grabbing me by the forearms, pushing me into the book shelf. "I am sorry Greg. I can't stop thinking about you." He pulled my closer to him, pressing his lips against mine, forcing his tongue into my mouth as I struggled to pull back from him.

"Please... don't do this." My body trembled even more as he pushed me down onto the sofa, climbing over the back to sit on top of me.

"Why are you shaking? You know I'd never hurt you babe." He slid his hands over the front of my jeans, fiddling with my belt.

"I don't know what you're capable off." I pushed his hands away, only making him advance closer, pressing his knees down on my hands. "Please get off me." I struggled beneath the larger figure on top of me, fearing my dream was actually coming true.

"Greg, I'm not gonna hurt you. Just relax."

"No please." I begged, trying to raise my arms pinned by his knees. "Please don't do this to me." Ryan looked down into my eyes as they started streaming with tears. "Please, please Ryan, please." I begged again, shaking violently now. It was obviously rattling Ryan seeing me so scared of him because he just sat there, looking down at me. "Please get off me."

"Hang on a second. You think I'd actually rape you?"

"I don't know what you're capable of. Please get of me."

"Greg . . . I'm so sorry."

"Just get off me." I pushed him back to the other side of the sofa, falling off; colliding my head with the sharp edge of the coffee table.

"Shit, Greg . . . are you okay?" He got down on the floor beside me, pulling my bloody hand away from my head. "Greg are you..."

"Don't touch me! Get out!" I shouted crawling back across the floor on my elbows, holding my head in agony. Ryan stared at me a moment then walked out the door, slamming it shut behind him.

I panted heavily, crawling back against the wall, looking at the blood on my hand. My body continued to violently shake making it very difficult to breath.

I hugged my knees close to my chest, staring at the door in fear that he was going to come back.

* * *

"Gregory!" My mother shouted through the letter box, banging on the door again while it was on the chain. "Honey please, open the door! I don't believe you have a cold for a second. Let me see you." She demanded.

I sent her a text message saying I was too sick to see her today so I didn't have to leave the apartment at risk of seeing Ryan again.

"Greg, I'll camp outside your door all day if I have to!" She shouted. I clutched my knees closer to my chest as I rocked backwards and forwards on my bed. I knew she wasn't going to give up, but as soon as she saw my head or the bruises she wouldn't leave. "Greg!" She shouted again. "C'mon sweetie . . . if you don't answer me I'll call the police . . . okay I'm dialling!"

I slowly eased myself off the bed, grabbing a baseball cap to pull down over my head. I winced as it rubbed against the cut on my head then slowly made my way off to the front door. "Mom please, I really am sick. I don't want you to catch it." I faked a hoarse cough, in a throaty voice I continued. "We'll do the wedding arrangements another day. I don't want you sick for your own wedding."

"That's a load of horse shit Gregory. You can fake a better cough than that. Open this door now!" She demanded. She pushed it forwards as far as it would go on the chain, trying to look round at me. "C'mon Gregory. I'm not leaving until I see you."

"Okay." I huffed. "Step back." She stepped back so I could close the door, pulling it off the chain.

She immediately barged through, starting at me angrily. "Why are you wearing that hat?" She whipped it off, immediately seeing the cut I had bandaged. "Did that asshole Ryan do this to you?"

"No . . . I fell asleep on the sofa and I hit my head."

"You are such a terrible liar!" She shouted at me. "At least put some effort into it. Why are you trying to hide it from me then? You said you'd be honest if Ryan did anything to you!"

"Mom please! I don't want to talk about this right now." I winced pulling the cap back on then slumped down into one of the dining room chairs.

"Greg, how's anyone supposed to help you if you keep lying to us?"

"I didn't ask for your help!" I shouted at her, dropping my head to the table. "I just want to be left alone."

"Greg sweetie, it kills me to see you like this. Please talk to me baby. I love you and I can't bare to see you hurting like this." She sat on the chair beside me, softly rubbing her hand up and down my back. "C'mon sweetheart . . . talk to me. This isn't your fault sweetheart."

"I let him in . . . I had sex with him all those times even though he treated me like shit, this is completely my fault." I sobbed into my hands.

"No it's not, honey." She started blubbering too. "This isn't your fault baby. He didn't get that far . . . did he?" I shook my head watching her sigh in relief. "Sweetheart, this is one hundred percent his fault. Don't you dare blame yourself! If you do that then I'm as much to blame."

"How are you to blame?"

"I don't know." She sobbed, wiping her eyes with a tissue. "I'm terrible at these situations you know I am. I cried for you when your prom date stood you up..."

"See... I'm such a fucking loser!" I scraped back my chair, storming off to my bedroom where I dove under the cover again, clutching the pillow close to my chest.

She followed me down the hall, appearing in my doorway. "Honey, you're not a loser. None of this is your fault."

"Yes it is! No one will ever want me. I might as well die!"

"Don't you dare say that!" She shouted at me. "I couldn't bare to live if I lost you."

"Please just go away mom." I sobbed into my pillow.

"Greg..."

"Just go!" I shouted. "I don't want you here. Please just go!" I continued to sob. "Go!"

She gulped sniffing back her tears, giving me a slight nod. "You know where I am if you need me sweetheart. I love you."

I heard her walk down the hall, collecting her purse off the table then walking out my apartment. I climbed off my bed, pushing my bedroom door shut, cautiously locking it before I dove back onto the bed, pulling the covers up around my trembling body.

* * *

About three hours later I jumped hearing the front door open. I clutched the pillow in front of me tightly hearing the footsteps on the hard wood floors outside and started to tremble as they approached my door. "Greg?" Nick's voice shouted, lightly knocking on my door. "What's this blood in the front room?" He asked concerned.

"I-I don't know." I choked.

Nick tried for the handle of my door, but it was locked. "What's wrong Greg?"

"Why does anything have to be wrong?" I shouted back, pulling the pillow over my head so I couldn't hear him anymore . . . and I didn't. He must have got bored of trying to get through to me and given up.

I felt pathetic curled up in bed, clutching my pillow tightly as if it was a lifeline. I wanted to get on with my life as though nothing had happened, but I couldn't even bring myself to vacate my bedroom.

I was angry at myself, especially since Nick and I made plans for dinner at six, _and now I ruined it._

"Greg? Are yah hungry buddy?" Nick knocked again an hour later.

"No." My muffled voice called back.

"Are you sure? It's Steak and chips."

"I'm sure."

"Okay, I'll leave yours in the oven in case you change your mind." He shouted, heading back to the kitchen.

I heard his chair scrape back on the floor as he sat down to enjoy his meal by himself, making me feel ten times more guilty.

I looked towards the door with blurred vision from all the tears, trying to convince myself to go out there and eat with him, but I couldn't move a muscle. Even though I was hungry as I only had his eggs he made me this morning, I stayed glued to the bed, curled up in a ball beneath the sheets. Feeling completely pathetic!

"G, you're gonna be late for work!"

"I don't care." I muttered.

"Are you sick G?"

"Yes!" I shouted wanting him to go away.

"Do you want me to get you anythin'?"

"No! Please just go away!"

"C'mon G." I heard him slide down the wall as he sat down on the floor outside my door. "Talk to me Greg . . . I'm tryin' to help you here, but it's a little hard to help when I don't know what's goin' on."

"Nothing's going on. I just want to be left alone. Why does everyone always assume the pathetic geek needs help?" I shouted angrily.

"Do you want me to call Griss for yah?" _Why is he being so nice and understanding? It makes it harder to reject him. _"I'll call him for yah." Nick scrambled to his feet, calling the lab. I heard him explaining to Grissom that I had a cold and wouldn't be coming in tonight, before he returned to my locked door. "He said to take as much time as you need Greg. Now will you tell me what's goin' on? I won't be able to sleep worryin' about you buddy."

"Nothing's wrong!" I shouted clutching handfuls of my hair.

"Greg you haven't been yourself lately, you're locking yourself in your room, having nightmares that have you shaking and screaming for help, bruises on your arms that you don't remember gettin', there's blood in the front room that you claim to not know anythin' about, along with the bloody cotton wool buds in the bathroom . . . and you won't open the door. Will you please tell me what's goin' on or do you want me to give you my professional opinion!" Nick calmly shouted. I could hear the concern in his voice.

"Why the fuck do you care Nick? I'm just a fucking loser!"

"No you're not Greg. You're my best friend and I care about you a lot." He shouted back, emotion seeping into his voice. "Please Greg . . . just open the door." He pleaded in the sweetest voice. I couldn't resist the Texan charm any longer. I climbed off the bed, unlocking the door then slowly pulled it open to see Nick's watery eyes looking back at me.

He didn't say anything just stepped closer, gently pulling me into his arms for a bear hug. I rested me head against his chest, stepping slightly closer as he slid his arms tighter around me. I wrapped my arms around him, crying against his chest. _This is exactly what I needed. _A nice warm hug without all the questions.

After a while our legs began to get tired. Nick steadily guided us towards my bed. He lay me down first then laid down beside me, wrapping his arms around me again. He lay flat on his back with me on my side in his arms, resting my head on his chest.

Neither of us spoke, just lay in one another's arms, slowly falling asleep.

* * *

**Please Review if you enjoyed it :D**

**Thanks to Tish for beat-ing, but I did some tweeking afterwards so there might be a few mistakes. I was actually crying to write this, so I'm very sorry if it makes you cry too.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight:**

I slowly eased my eyelids open, gently allowing the sunlight streaming in through the window to enter my eyes. I smelt the strong scents of Nick Stokes nearby, realising that my pillow was in fact Nick. I nervously bit my lip, looking up towards his eyes seeing they were firmly shut and he was softly snoozing. He looked so peaceful and _Gorgeous_, while he was sleeping. _Like an angel!_ No straight best friend in the world (or my world anyway) hugs their roommate while he's in tears, falling asleep with him in his arms. Maybe this is Nick's subtle way of saying he likes me. _Can't think too much into it though. Maybe he's just being nice?_

I tried to ease off his chest slightly, but his arms were wrapped tightly around my waist, holding me in place against his chest. As I tried to move he tightened his grip, pulling me closer. _Not that I was complaining!_ I leant back against his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart against my ear. Every beat was like heaven to me. I closed my eyes again, treasuring this moment. It was the greatest feeling in the world to be pressed up against his chest, listening to his soft snoring and the soft pitter pat of his heartbeat. _Even if we were just friends. I'd treasure this moment forever..._

Nick's phone suddenly started going off in his pocket. The noise startled him awake, he stretched his arms out slightly, but he didn't freak that I was lying on his chest still. He gave out a grunt as he shifted on the bed, yawning widely as he rubbed his sleepy eyes open. I kept my eyes closed, still resting against his warm body.

Nick lifted me slightly, digging inside his jeans pocket to retrieve his ringing cell phone, snapping it open to hold it up to his ear. "_Stokes."_ He whispered as he thought I was still asleep because I was too much of a chicken to face him. "_Yep . . . Okay Cath . . . I'll be right there."_ Nick quietly snapped his phone shut, carefully lifting me off of him to the bed beside him.

I subtly fluttered my eyes open to look up at him sleepily.

"_Hey, shh . . . it's just me."_ Nick whispered, putting his finger to his lips. "_I gotta go to work . . . go back to sleep G." _He gently lifted my arm from his waist placing it at my side on the bed. "_I'll call you later okay." _He eased himself off the bed, walking out my room, closing the door behind him. _Call me later? Does this mean we're dating and I don't know about it . . . or is he just a concerned friend? _Well he didn't give me a kiss goodbye so that leans more to the friend thing. _Unless he's worried about morning breath? God I'm so confused! Why did he have to wake up with me? Couldn't he have just snuck out like he did the other day? It would make things so much easier! Maybe I should ask him when he calls me?_

I sat up in bed listening to the front door shutting behind him. He has a date tonight with some broad he met, so I'm sure that would send me a clear message_. If he goes on the date, it was a friend thing, if not then he's totally in love with me. _I smiled to myself slightly then pulled the covers up around me that still smelt of Nick, trying to get some more sleep.

_Crap! Now I need the bathroom! _I glanced up at my closed bedroom door, wondering how much longer I could hold it. _I'm shaking again! I hate you Ryan! I can't even go to the bathroom without shaking with fear._

I fidgeted on the bed trying to hold it in as long as I could, but it really wasn't helping. _C'mon Greg, get a hold of yourself! The front doors locked the bathrooms just down the hall. You can do this or are you really that pathetic?_

"I'm not pathetic." I crawled towards the end of the bed, staring at the door to my room. The bathroom is just a few paces down the hall and it has a lock itself, but it still seemed so far away. What was I going to do if I got hungry? _The kitchens even further in the opposite direction!_

"I can do this." I climbed off the bed, hesitantly walking towards my bedroom door as though it was a gateway to hell. I took the door handle in a firm grip, feeling bitter trembles rushing up my arm as it made contact with the cold handle. _I'll run down the hall, slam the bathroom door shut and lock it! Perfectly safe. _I tried to assure myself.

I took in a few deep breaths then slowly started to turn the door handle. I pulled it towards me, feeling a chilly sweep of air brushing against my body as I threw it open. I glanced down the hall towards the front door, fearfully taking my first step out into the hall. I gulped hard, feeling as though I just swallowed my tongue then took off running for the bathroom, throwing the door shut behind me, locking it then leaning against it panting heavily.

"Pathetic!" I sighed deeply. I flipped up the toilet seat, finally relieving myself then turned to the mirror to see a path of dried blood down the side of my face. Nick obviously hadn't seen it as I was lying on that side of my head when I was on my stomach against him.

I brushed my teeth then triply checked the bathroom door was locked before I turned on the shower, shedding my sweat drenched clothing to the floor, climbing cautiously in to the shower. I winced as the water brushed down my head, making contact with the deep gash in my forehead from the impact of the coffee table. _I'm surprised Nick didn't ask about it. _Every few seconds I found myself fretfully looking round the side of the shower curtain to check I was still alone and the door was still locked.

I glanced back round the shower curtain then slid down the shower wall to sit on the cold tiled floor, letting the water flow down over my vulnerable flesh. _I can't believe how low I've sunk. _I'm terrified of everything now. All it took was for Ryan to sit on me, holding me down, threatening to have sex with me and _I'm a nervous wreck! _My dream was actually far worse than the real thing. My dream made him out to be a monster, raping me and tearing me apart inside, right there in my own front room. In real life he got scared before he even got started and actually left.

"I'm so screwed up." I sobbed, clasping my hands around my knees, pulling them closer to my chest. I stayed sat in that same position for what seemed like forever. The warm water eventually turned cold, making me shiver as the icy cold drips poured down over my exposed flesh. Instead of turning it off like most logical people would do; I stayed right there, clutching my knees tightly as I shivered constantly, chattering my teeth together so hard I thought my teeth were going to shatter.

"Greg?" Nick's voice called through the apartment. I wanted to call out to him, but I was so cold I couldn't even speak. "Greg?" Nick knocked on the bathroom door a few times, listening to the water trickling from the shower. "Greg . . . are you okay?" I heard him knocking again, but I still couldn't move. "G if you don't answer me I'm gonna have to come in!" Nick shouted. _I really regret telling him where I hid the master key. _But knowing Nick he wanted to come in to check I was alive. Working this job really takes a toll on your life. You start fearing the worse all the time.

"Greg!" Nick shouted again, knocking on the door. "I'm comin' in okay buddy?" _Great! He's gonna see the wuss hiding out in the shower too scared to turn off the freezing cold shower water. _I was shivering so hard I couldn't even feel my arm and leg muscles now.

"Greg." Nick voice sounded louder. He must be in the bathroom by now. "Greg, you okay?"

"Y-Yeah." I shivered, from behind the curtain.

"Greg, how long you been in there?"

"I-I don't k-know." Nick slowly pulled the curtain to the side, looking at me hunched in a ball, trembling from the cold. He turned the water off then grabbed a towel from the linen closet beside the shower.

"C'mon G, you're gonna catch hypothermia or somethin'."

"I-In Veg-gas?" I shivered.

"It could happen." Nick wrapped the warm towel around my shoulders, lifting me to my feet. He wrapped the towel around me tighter then slid down the wall with me in his arms, gently rubbing my arms to warm me up. He softly rested his warm head against mine, trying to warm me up still as my teeth chattered. "God, you're like an ice cube." The cold drips from my hair slid down his face, dripping to his shirt. "You okay Greg?" He softly whispered.

"W-Why are y-you he-re?" I shivered.

"You're welcome." He smirked, continuing to rub my body so I could feel my limbs again. "I'm on my lunch break. I wanted to see if you had eaten yet." I shook my head against his shoulder. "Thought so. Lucky I did come back for lunch."

"W-Why are y-you hel-helping . . . m-me?" I chattered.

"Because I'm your friend." He pulled me closer, circling his arms around me, warming my body with his own. "C'mon let's get you into bed with some warm clothes." Nick helped me to my feet, walking me down the hall to my bedroom with the towel still wrapped around me. Nick helped me with my boxers (_I didn't really want him t0),_ but he did. He didn't look though, prefect gentlemen.

He got out some of my clean pyjamas, helping me with the trousers then pulled the shirt over my arms, carefully buttoning it up down my front. Every time his warm fingers touched my cold flesh, I quivered slightly.

"I'll go get you a nice hot cup of coffee." Nick lifted the sheets on my bed, allowing me to crawl under then carefully tucked them around me. He disappeared out the door, returning a few minutes later with a steaming hot mug of my favourite coffee. "I can call Cath and ask for the day..."

"N-No Nicky . . . t-that's okay." I interrupted. "I-I'll be fine." I took the mug from his hands, leaning back against the headboard with it between both my hands, trying to warm myself up. Nick sat on the edge of my bed watching me a moment. By his expression I could tell he was desperate to ask me something, but maybe too afraid to. "S-Shouldn't you g-ge-et back to work?"

"You still need me." He said so simply, looking into my eyes.

"I-I can take care of my-myself Nicky."

"Didn't say you couldn't." He smiled at me. "But you still haven't eaten..."

"I-I'm not hu-hungry." I curled my legs up tighter, trying to keep myself warm against the small mug of coffee.

"Greg . . . you know I'm gonna need to know what's goin' on eventually."

"Not-Nothing's going on." I sheepishly answered, bringing the coffee to my lips.

"Yeah because people sit in showers until they freeze to death all the time over nothin'." He said sarcastically. "Greg please just tell me what's goin' on with you. You're completely not yourself..."

"I-I am." I protested even though I wasn't.

"Since when does Greg Sanders stay in bed all the time, lies to me . . . and freezes himself almost to death in the shower?" He asked me up front. "You don't wonna tell me . . . that's fine, I'm a patient man. I'll call you later to check on you..."

"I-I'm not a ch-charity case, N-Nicky." I chattered.

"I know you're not." Nick climbed off my bed looking at me concerned. "I'll call you later G. Make sure you drink that." He pointed to my coffee, heading out my bedroom door, clicking it shut behind him.

* * *

I woke up a few hours later to the sound of my phone vibrating against the wooden cabinet beside my bed. I scrambled over to the other side of my bed, reaching for my phone. I looked at the caller ID, rejecting the call as I saw Ryan's name flash across the screen.

Even seeing his name flashing across the screen of my phone made me shudder with fear. I scrambled off the bed, locking my bedroom door then dove back under the covers, sitting against the headboard with my knees pulled close to my chest. I started rocking backwards and forwards slightly as my phone started vibrating again. I practically jumped out of my skin as there was a knock at the front door. I knew Nick had his keys and I wasn't expecting anyone. I squeezed my eyes tightly shut, panting heavily as the knocking persisted. I clamped my hands over my ears, blocking out all the sounds around me.

"Greg!" A familiar voice shouted. I jumped from where I was laying, realising I must have fallen asleep again. "Greg it's me, open up buddy!" Nick shouted again. I crawled towards the edge of the bed, flattening my hair slightly as I went to open the door.

Nick peered through the gap as I slowly opened the door, allowing him to enter. He was holding take away boxes of pancakes in his hands, right from I-Hop, my favourite diner. He stepped inside, watching me close and lock the door again behind him, but he didn't say anything just sat on the edge of my bed with the pancake boxes in his hands.

"Are you done with work?" I asked crawling onto the bed to sit against the headboard again.

"Yeah." He handed over a box for me, still watching me curiously. "Have you been in bed this whole time?" I nodded shovelling some pancakes into my mouth. "You didn't need the bathroom?"

"I _can_ go to the bathroom Nicky." I scowled him. "I'm not a child."

"I didn't say you were." He said defensively. "I called you, you must have been sleepin'." He looked at my phone on the bedside table that was shattered to pieces as I had slammed the base of the lamp down on it several times to stop it from ringing. "Or maybe it was out of service." He smirked. "Greg you can tell me anythin' . . . you know that right?"

"There's nothing to talk about."

"I mean if you do . . . you ever want to talk to me. You can tell me anythin' at all." He said softly then returned to eating his pancakes.

I sat watching him for a few minutes, before I finally spoke up. "I hit it on the table."

"What?" He looked round at me confused.

"The blood in the living room . . . it's from my head . . . I hit it on the table." He looked at my head, setting down his pancakes on the bedside table. He slowly advanced towards me, carefully peeling the bandage I had placed over the deep cut. I winced slightly as the bandage tugged at my skin, but he had such an angelic touch that I barely felt it.

Nick examined the cut carefully then looked into my eyes. "Do you want me to clean it up for you?" I nodded slightly looking back into his big soulful eyes. Everything he does makes me love him even more.

Nick climbed off the bed, unlocking my door then reclosing it behind him. A few seconds later he came back with the first aid kit, locking the door behind him as he walked over to my bed. I finished off the last of my pancakes, setting the empty pancake box down beside me then scooted down the bed slightly to lay down on the pillows. Nick sat down beside me, looking down into my eyes as he softly dabbed an alcoholic wipe across my forehead.

"Ow." I winced slightly.

"Sorry." I gave him a soft smile, looking up into his gorgeous chocolate brown eyes as he studied my face. He softly pressed a fresh bandage to my head then returned my smile. "How does that feel?"

"Better . . . thank you, Nicky."

"You're welcome." He cleaned up the wipes and things, tossing them into the trashcan beside my bed then looked back round at me. "So how did you end up hittin' your head then G?" He queried. I slowly sat up against the headboard again, pulling my knees close to my chest, hugging them tightly.

Nick kept looking at me concerned, but he didn't say anything, just cleared the first aid box up, setting it down on the floor beside the bed.

"Okay G . . . I'm gonna be right across the hall . . . if you need me, or have a nightmare just come right in, okay?" I looked up at him nodding. He smiled softly then took his pancakes with him out the door back to his bedroom. I rested my head against my knees, closing my eyes. I wished I could be brave and tell him the truth, but I couldn't. I couldn't even leave my bedroom I was so scared.

* * *

I woke up a couple of hours later from another nightmare, sweating and shaking like crazy. I tried to steady my panic breathing, taking slow deep breaths, but that just made me feel very light headed. As per Nick's instructions I climbed out of bed slowly, approaching my door with a trembling hand. I took a deep breath then walked across the hall, lightly tapping on his door in case he was asleep.

"Yeah?" He shouted wide awake. I slowly opened the door seeing him sat in bed reading through some magazines on his bed; Lots of wildlife and national geographic ones as he's a fan of wild animals and things. Everyone at work thinks he watches too much television, but they don't know how much he reads on all this stuff.

He looked up at me then smiled. "Hey." He swept back the covers beside him, indicating for me to join him. I cautiously climbed onto his bed, being pulled into his arms right against his chest. "You wonna tell me about it yet?" He asked softly. I shook my head with my trembling body pressed right against his. "Okay." He whispered softly, continuing to read through his magazines with me in his arms. _This was definitely more than friends. A lot more!_

After a few minutes of watching him flipping through the magazines and listening to his steady breathing, I finally decided to tell him. "Okay Nicky . . . I have to tell you something."

Nick set down his magazine, inching down the bed slightly so he was level with me against the pillows. Suddenly I felt really nervous again and I couldn't say what I wanted to as I looked into his eyes. I took in a few choppy breaths, trying to find my words, but I completely froze up, unable to speak.

I sat up on his bed, clutching my knees close to my chest, resting my head on my knees as my body started to tremble again. Nick sat up in front of me, softly placing his hands on my knees as I raised my head to look at him.

"Greg, you can tell me anythin'. Nothin' will change the way I feel about you." He softly spoke. _How does he feel about me? _I queried myself, looking up into his big brown eyes. _Well he lets me in his bed for starters and he cuddles me, a few nights in a row now._

_Now or Never._

"Nicky . . . I-I'm . . . I'm bisexual." I looked into his eyes seeing he didn't change the way he looked at me at all. "This guy . . . I was seeing." I gulped nervously, looking back into his eyes. "He's a complete jerk."

After a long pause Nick finally spoke. "Greg . . . do you think I'm gonna change the way I look at you because you're bisexual?"

"I don't know. You're not . . . so I guess not." Nick shook his head looking into my eyes.

"Greg . . . I'm not old fashioned, or close minded." He leant back slightly, looking down at the bruises on my forearms. "So this jerk . . . did he do this to you?"

I nodded taking in a few nervous deep breaths, resting my head against my knees again so I didn't have to look him in the eyes. "Remember I said I was being black mailed."

"Yeah."

"I broke it off with him, so he was black mailing me into having sex with him. When I refused he tried to..." My breath caught in my throat as I struggled to speak. Nick just sat silently, patiently waiting. "I'm so pathetic." I sobbed into my knees.

"No you're not Greg." I felt the bed shift slightly as Nick inched towards me, softly smoothing a palm up and down my back. "Greg you're not pathetic. None of this is your fault."

"It is . . . you weren't there." I sobbed harder. Nick pulled me against his chest, wrapping his arms tighter around me.

"Greg . . . it's not your fault. It's this jerks fault, whoever did this to you . . . it's their fault not yours." He whispered softly, gently rocking my trembling body in his arms. "You wonna tell me who did do this to you?" I shook my head. "Greg, why are you protectin' him? What if he comes back and I don't know who he is?" Nick tried to reason with me. "At least tell me what he looks like so I don't let him in."

"Y-You . . . you met him." I nervously stammered.

"Who?"

"That guy Ryan." I looked up into Nick's eyes as they widened with surprise.

"The guy I let in here the other day?" He asked shocked. "He wasn't hurtin' you then was he?"

"Only emotionally." I muttered. "Don't blame yourself Nicky. It's my fault."

"No Greg it's not your fault. It's not your fault at all." He pulled me back into his arms, softly smoothing his palms up and down my back again. "Greg . . . do you wonna talk about it?" I shook my head without looking up at him. "Greg, I kinda know how you feel."

"How?" I sobbed.

"I've never told anyone this before." I heard Nick taking in a few choppy breaths. "When I was a kid . . . around nine I think . . . we had this last minute babysitter . . . I never met her before . . . she seemed really nice." I looked up into Nick's eyes, looking at the tears threatening to spill. "She did things to me . . . things I didn't understand at the time . . . I remember bein' underneath her . . . feelin' completely helpless . . . just like you I closed myself off."

"I'm not helpless." I snapped at him, even though I did feel helpless.

"I didn't say you were G." Nick looked into my eyes, softly biting his bottom lip. "The point is . . . I remember afterwards . . . I sat alone in my room, in the dark . . . watchin' the door . . . hopin' she wasn't gonna come back . . . I did it for weeks . . . no one even noticed." I rested my chin on my knees, realising I was doing the exact same thing as him, only I had him looking out for me. "Greg, you can't let this jerk make you into a helpless victim . . . I did . . . I spent the better part of my childhood coped up inside . . . you can't let this ruin your life Greg."

"You really never told that to anyone before?" I asked, wiping the tears from my eyes.

"Catherine . . . not all the details though."

"So that's why you're being so understanding and nice to me?"

"No, that you get for free. I'm your friend Greg . . . I can tell when somethin's wrong with yah." He lay back down on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. "I know how it feels to be victimised Greg . . . I was tryin' to give you the help and support I didn't have . . . but you can't blame yourself for a second."

"Aren't you freaked?"

"That what?" Nick asked confused, looking up at me.

"That he was a guy?"

Nick shook his head leaning up on his elbows. "Greg, I'm not old fashioned. I always thought you might be bisexual . . . I accept people for who they are. I'm not gonna act differently around you _just_ because your bisexual."

"And you're cool with that?"

"Why would it bother me?" Nick asked, giving me a slight smile. "You're still the same old Greg Sanders. Whether you shave all your hair off, change your look, date Orlando Bloom." We both chuckled slightly. "You're still the same Greg . . . that's why you can't let this jerk scare you from continuing the rest of your life . . . you can't be too scared to live Greg, you've gotta start blamin' him instead of yourself . . . the Greg Sanders I know wouldn't let this over power him. You didn't stay coped up inside after the lab explosion did yah?" I shook my head. "And your always helpin' me whenever I have one of my nightmares . . . I miss that Greg." I rested my head back on my knees trying to think. _If Nick was doing this because he knows what it's like to be victimised, that means he wasn't doing it because he really likes me._

"You can talk to me whenever you want Greg. I won't pressure you."

"Thank you." I whispered softly, looking into his eyes. "I mean really thank you . . . so much Nicky."

"You're welcome. You wonna tell me this jerk's last name?" I shook my head. "You don't wonna get him off the streets."

"I don't want people to know."

"Greg it's nothin' to be ashamed of." He sat up again to look in my eyes. "No one's gonna judge you for bein' victimised."

"No . . . I don't wonna bother them with this."

"Bother them? Greg it's not your fault."

"It kind of is..."

"No Greg, don't think that. That's what I kept thinkin' when I was a kid. I thought it was all my fault. It took me years to get over it. It's not your fault." Nick looked into my eyes giving me a soft shoulder squeeze. "We don't have to tell them okay. But wouldn't you feel better if this guy was off the streets . . . where he couldn't hurt you or anyone else ever again? Don't you want justice for what he did..."

"He didn't get that far . . . he bailed when I bleeding."

"Well he coulda left you to die G. That's no excuse for what he did. He was still gonna try right?" I nodded slightly. "Just tell me his last name. I won't tell anyone I swear . . . not unless you want me to."

"His names Ryan Clark." I muttered.

"And it's that guy I let in the other day when I came back from runnin'?" I nodded again. "Okay . . . do you want me to get you anythin'?"

"I'm not helpless."

"Didn't say you were Greg." Nick said defensively, leaning back against the headboard again. "Did you want a coffee . . . or are you still hungry? I know you can get it yourself, but since I'm gettin' up anyway."

"No I'm fine . . . thank you." He smiled to me then climbed off the bed heading out his bedroom. He returned a few minutes later with a coffee in hand, setting it down on his bedside table as he climbed back into bed.

"Don't you have a date tonight?" I remembered.

"Nah, I cancelled." _Sign number one he sees me more than a friend._ "I was gonna go over and see Starla, she wants to talk more about the baby. Hopefully she's not beggin' to have me back again. I did get this waitresses number today though." He grinned, presenting the evidence from his pocket. Same old Nick! _He wasn't doing it because he loves me. He was doing it because he saw me as a helpless victim._

"Hey, where are you goin'?" He asked as I climbed off the bed.

"That coffee smells too good. I'm gonna get myself one."

"See there's my Greg." He smiled at me proudly watching me walk out the room. I didn't even shake this time as I walked off towards the kitchen, pouring myself a mug of coffee then returning to Nick's room.

* * *

**Please Review. This chapter was orginally two chapters long, but I thought it made Greg seem a little bit helpless and pathetic so I shortened it slightly. Even my beta agrees this version is better then the orignal so I hope you like it :D**

**Thanks to Tish for beta-ing**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine:**

I turned the key in the door, almost falling through it, but I managed to grab the handle going down, slowing my crash slightly as I stumbled to my knees. I staggered to my feet, trying to push the door shut as quietly as I could, but my efforts were useless as Warrick and Nick were both sat on the sofa, glaring at me open mouthed.

"Greg? Are you..."

"Drunk?" I cut Warrick off with drunken a giggle. "I only had..." I held the door handle tightly beginning to sway with dizziness. "Three or Four."

"Three or Four what?" Nick asked, walking towards me to support me in case I fell face first into the floor.

"Bottles." I crashed into his body, feeling the world spinning around me. "Just a little though." He stood me up right, looking into my eyes.

"Jeez Greg, bottles of beer or wine?" I scratched my head trying to remember, but instead I just shrugged with another drunken giggle.

I felt limp again, literally falling into his arms this time. I spaced out a little after that, vaguely remembering being carried down the hall to my room. Nick removed my coat and shoes, placing a cold cloth on my forehead.

I suddenly felt a tight pain in my stomach as though my insides were going to turn inside out. "Wait . . . I'm gonna..."

"Throw up?" Nick asked. I managed to nod slightly as he helped me off the bed towards the bathroom. He kicked up the toilet seat for me, kneeling me down in front of it then disappeared out the door returning with a can of Pepsi. My throat burned as I vomited up three full rounds, including a few dry heaves that always scare me because it feels like your insides are going to tear apart.

Nick sat with me; softly smoothing his palm up and down my back then handed over the can of Pepsi.

"Thanks." I managed to choke out. "Where's Warrick?" I asked taking a swig of the Pepsi then held the cold can to my thumping forehead.

"He went home." Nick watched me wince as I leant back against the wall, holding the can to the other side of my head. "Are you okay?"

I nodded trying to keep my mouth shut. I have a habit of over talking about anything when I'm drunk and sometimes I don't even realise it. Nick sat against the wall beside me, listening to my breathing beginning to steady.

"So was it bottles of beer or wine Greg?" He asked curiously. I looked at him giving him are shrug. "Your first night out since . . . and you get completely hammered. Why didn't you want me to come with you?"

"I don't need a babysitter Nicky." I groaned, taking a swig of the Pepsi to clear my throat.

"I never said you did G. Maybe I just wanted to go with you." Nick grabbed the can as I almost dropped it, setting it down on the floor between us. "So where did you go?"

"Bar." I slurred, rubbing my eyes.

"Did you meet anyone?" He looked at my lips seeing I was keeping them tightly shut. "Are you afraid to talk to me drunk G?" He chuckled.

"No." I slurred, nodding my head.

He laughed, leaning right back against the wall beside me. "Did you go alone or with friends?"

"What's with the fifty questions?" I asked then winced holding my head. "Ow."

"You okay?"

"My head." I pointed.

Nick nodded at me as if I was insane. "It's called a hangover Greg." He chuckled at me. "I suppose you forgot to eat too?" I nodded taking another swig of the Pepsi beside me. "We should get you off to bed then. You wonna shower first, you're a sloppy vomiter." He chuckled looking at my clothes.

I managed to nod slightly then the next thing I knew he's pulling me to my feet, turning the shower water on, to get it warmed up. "Need some help?" He asked as I wobbled towards the sink, setting the can of Pepsi down.

"No . . . I can . . . I can." I struggled with my t-shirt trying to lift it over my head.

"Here . . . lemme help you." Nick stepped towards me, taking the rim of my t-shirt in his hands, slowly pulling it up over my head. He then worked open the belt of my jeans, popping open my flies. This was every one of my fantasies rolled into one, and he had no idea.

Nick slipped off my jeans, supporting me as I stepped out of them then went for my boxers, the last piece of clothing.

"I can take it from here." I said holding my hands over my boxers, keeping them in place. He gave me a smile then took a step back. "Can I have a little privacy?" I asked, bumping into the edge of the sink, almost toppling over.

"Greg you can barely stand. I don't want you to crack your head open too." I stuck my thumbs in the rim of my boxers looking at him. "Are you shy G?" He smiled at me.

"No!" I protested, blushing bright red. "Could you at least turn around?" He reluctantly turned around so I could whip my boxers off, heading into the shower. _Maybe that should be a sign he might like me. _Maybe that's just wishful thinking. _I've got to get over him!_

"I'll grab yah some clean clothes G." He called out, heading into my bedroom.

I barely remember my shower, next thing I know I'm waking up in my bed in boxers, clean boxers that is, lying in the centre of my bed. I looked around the room then started to feel my head pounding again. _Ugh... I hate hangovers!!! _That's the one part of drinking I hate, but I never learn my lesson.

"Hey Greg!" Nick's voice sounded through the door. I pulled the covers over my lower half then flattened my hair slightly. "You awake G?"

"I'm up." I called back. He opened the door holding a coffee mug and a bottle of aspirin. "Thanks."

"How's the head?"

"Okay." He handed me the coffee, taking two pills from the aspirin bottle. I smiled to him throwing back the pills with some coffee. "So um . . . Nick, how did I get from the shower to the bed?" I awkwardly asked.

"Oh, you passed out. So I carried you." He sat on the edge of my bed, watching me drinking my coffee.

"Oh." I answered, sure I was blushing.

"I didn't look I swear." He promised me with a wide smile.

"That's what Sara said right before she looked." I chuckled, watching him blushing.

"When did Sara see you naked?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" I teased him, making him blush brighter as he looked at my bare chest.

"You are still comin' into work today, right?" He awkwardly asked as he climbed to his feet, trying to change the subject.

"I guess." I shrugged.

"Good enough." He laughed, making a quick exit out my door. I smile wider at his hasty exit. It was so easy to mess with him because he was completely clueless of how I felt about him.

* * *

"Greg! Welcome back, heard you were sick." Sara shouted, walking towards me in the hallway of the lab.

"Yeah, I'm all better now. Miss me?" _Despite the hangover so please don't shout again!_

"Course." She chuckled, ruffling my hair, _Ouch! Don't touch the head. _I winced away from her hand giving her a half smile. "The labs never the same without cha here Greg." I ducked out of her grasp, flattening my hair again. I hated it when she did that, she treated me like her baby brother. _Not that I minded of course, I'd gladly have Sara as my big sister. _I just didn't like the hair ruffling; _it takes me ages to achieve this style_.

"You heading for the breakroom?" She asked me.

"Yep." She linked arms with me, heading in that direction. Nick had convinced me to come into work today, all day yesterday actually; he wouldn't shut up about it, so here I am. Apparently Grissom had news for us all, hopefully it was an extended vacation or something, but he asked Catherine, Warrick and Nick to come in too.

Sara and I walked into the breakroom where everyone was already waiting, _except for Grissom! _He's always late, even for meetings he planned. I sat down on the sofa between Sara and Nick, watching the seconds hand on the clock ticking around as everyone talked amongst themselves. Though I could hear the chatter, I couldn't make out the words, but their speech was soothing. I had been hiding out in my apartment for over a week in the silence, only going out with Nick occasionally to the grocery store as he was trying to help getting me out of the house. It was nice to be back around people with their noisy chatter filling the silence.

"Man where is Grissom?" Nick suddenly shouted, making me wince from my slight hangover. "He's over..." Nick checked his watch. "Twenty minutes late and he yells at us for bein' late."

"Relax Nicky. He'll be here." Catherine groaned, checking her watch. "I was a better supervisor then this." She muttered under her breath. Nick groaned, folding his arms across his chest as he fidgeted on the sofa beside me.

Grissom finally walked through the breakroom door a further ten minutes later, with assignment slips in his hands. "Sara and Warrick . . . missing child." He announced handing a slip to Warrick. He glanced over at the rest of us sat on the sofa. "Nick and Greg . . . possible body dump." Nick took the slip from his hands reading the address. "And Catherine you're with me."

"Whoa, hold on Gil!" Catherine climbed to her feet, looking at him confused. "We're all back on nightshift together?"

"Yeah . . . you didn't get the memo?" He asked her, peering over the top of his glasses at her.

"So we're all back on nightshift as of _now_? Do you really think I'm that incapable of running a team? It wasn't my fault Nicky got kidnapped." She shouted at him angrily.

"No one's blaming you Catherine. I thought you'd be happy we're all on the same team again."

"Oh perfect!" She shouted sarcastically, snatching the slip from his hands then storming off out the breakroom.

Grissom turned to the rest of us, waiting for us to speak. "Are the rest of you okay with this?"

"We're Cool." Warrick nodded. "C'mon Sara." He said waving the slip around in his hands. Sara tapped me on the knee then jumped up from the sofa, following Warrick out the break room.

"And are you guys are okay with it?" Grissom asked Nick and I still sat on the sofa together.

"Yep, we're cool with this." Nick smiled to him, climbing to his feet. "C'mon G, I'm drivin'." He said looking round at me then walked off out the breakroom past Grissom.

"Good to have you back Greg." Grissom smiled, tapping me on the shoulder as I walked by.

"Thanks." I shoved my hands deep into my pockets, following after Nick towards the locker room. We grabbed our vests and kits then walked off down to the garage to his car.

Nick completely ignored me as he started to drive off. Usually he'd be fiddling with the radio at this point, but he left it off, for a very awkward moment of silence. _Deadly silence that I absolutely hate._

"So when's Scarlas next doctor's appointment?" I asked, trying to end the silence.

"Dunno," was his reply. I tapped my fingers on my knee, trying to stop my awkward habit of overtalking before it started, but I couldn't hold in the chatter any longer.

"So you cancelled your date and invited Warrick over yesterday?"

"Uh huh."

"I thought you were really looking forward to going out with Linda?"

"Lilah." He corrected, without looking at me still. _Great! What have I done this time?_

"Are you going out tonight?"

"Nah." He stopped the truck on the side of the road, near where the call out had come from, climbing out his truck in record time. I've been on the receiving end of Nick's icy cold moods before, but this one was pure torture. _What could I have possibly done?_

Unfortunately Grissom had paired us together on a _possible _dead body out in the middle of nowhere. Near the Lake to be more precise and as it was only a _possible _dead body tip. It was just the two of us without any officers around. Completely bogus tip and waste of our time. I say bogus tip because we've been looking for three hours and it's only getting colder. Especially the tension between Nick and me, it was so cold it was icy. He hadn't talked to me once. I didn't know if it was because I said something to him while I was drunk yesterday. Or he was pissed at me about something else. _He seemed fine when we left for work._

"Got anythin'?" He shouted over to me.

"No!" I shouted back.

"This is total BS. There's nothin' here!" Nick shouted, dropping to sit on a log. I clicked my flashlight off, walking towards him, trying to think of something to say. "Why couldn't we get the missin' child case or somethin'? We always get the bull shit assignments!"

"Nick..."

"I can't believe you Sanders. You call me your best friend, but you're keepin' secrets from me."

"Okay." _Crap! What did I say to him? _I shoved my hands in my pockets, taking a few steps closer to him. "Nick, what exactly did I keep from you?" I asked confused.

"Well think of the one things you're keepin' from me smart ass."

"Did I say something to you last night? Because I don't remember it." I involuntary shivered as a cold tremor shuddered down my spine. "Nick whatever it is . . . you're gonna have to tell me. It might not even be true."

"Greg . . . how could you lie to me all this time!" He shouted looking up at me.

"About what?" I asked completely confused.

"Well what are you keepin' from me G? I tell you everythin'."

"Um... I don't know . . . I've never told you I'm scared of spiders. I've never told you I wanted to be a fireman when I was a kid. I never told you I wore braces in Highschool. I never told you my first time with a woman was at the bunny ranch. I never told you my first time with a guy was after prom." I looked at his eyes slowly widening. "Was it any of them?"

"No. You told me you didn't go to prom."

"I didn't . . . he came over mine after." I slumped down against a large tree nearby, looking out at the lake.

"What else haven't you told me?" Nick queried.

"I'm not into bondage." Nick's face erupted into a smile. "Can't think of anything else." I lied, looking at his expression. "What did I say to you? Was it last night? You know I ramble when I'm drunk." Nick dropped his head in his hands, avoiding eye contact with me. "Okay there is one more thing." He looked up at me, waiting for me to speak. "I never told you . . . I never told you I loved you." His eyes grew wider. _Damn it. I really just said that._ That obviously wasn't it! Nick stared at me a moment in disbelief. "That wasn't what your mad at me about was it?" Nick shook his head, dropping his head to his knees. "Okay if it wasn't that then what was it?"

"You mean you real..." He looked up at me again curiously. "You love me?"

I sheepishly nodded avoiding eye contact with him. "I know that puts a big strain on our friendship . . . I wasn't expecting you to love me back if that's what your worried about. I'm fine with just being friends." I looked up at him; he looked as though he was going to be sick. "Nick, say something please."

"You're an asshole Greg, you know that?" He snapped, climbing to his feet. He ran his fingers through his hair, anxiously looking around at the lake. "I gotta..." He stopped mid-sentence and starting walking away.

I watched him disappearing under the moonlit sky. _If that wasn't it then what could it have possibly been?_

"Story of my life." I mumbled, leaning back against the tree. "Holy Shit!" I crawled away from the tree seeing the body stuffed up the tree looking down at me. "Nick! Nick!" I shouted after him but he had completely vanished. "Fine." I huffed, pulling my brand new cell phone from my pocket calling Brass myself.

Brass showed up with David within a few minutes, finding me in no time. I had to photograph and document the scene myself as Nick was still walking off somewhere. _Probably ran back to the apartment to move all his stuff out before his disgusting roommate got home._

"Sanders, where's Nick?" Brass shouted over at me. I shrugged, seeing if I could spot him in any of the directions, but it was too dark to see.

* * *

"Hey Greg." Sara smiled walking into the breakroom. She poured herself a coffee then looked at the blank stare on my face. "Greg, what's up with you?"

"I just told my best friend I love him and no one's seen him since." Sara walked towards me, sitting down on the coffee table in front of me.

"Who?" She asked curiously.

"See that's what I love about you. You didn't even register the fact that I said _him _you just ask who he is." I chuckled slightly, leaning back against the sofa cushions.

"Well . . . who is he?" She asked again, taking a sip of her coffee.

"Nick."

"You told him you loved him and now he's missing?" I sheepishly nodded. Sara placed on hand on my knee looking into my eyes. "You really love him?"

"Yes." I muttered.

"Then why didn't you go after him?"

"He could snap me like a twig. I've already got a few holes in my walls from his anger strikes."

"Nick wouldn't hurt you Greg. Maybe he just needed some time to think?"

"Four hours?" I asked looking up at the clock. "He's probably booking his tickets to the other side of the world, or moving all his stuff out of my apartment."

"Why would he do that?"

"Because he looked like he was going to throw up when I told him." I dropped my head into my hands, running my fingers through my hair. "I'm so stupid. I should really learn to keep my mouth shut."

"You wouldn't be Greg if you did." Sara told me, shifting onto the sofa beside me, putting her arm around my shoulders. "You just told him straight up front?" I nodded. "Well I think you should wait for him to cool down before you talk to him again." We both looked up as someone walked in, loudly clearing their throat. "Grissom." Sara smiled in surprise, removing her arm from my shoulder. "Greg was just... upset about something."

I looked up at the jealous rage look in Grissom's eyes then the awkward attempt of Sara, trying cover her tracks. _Holy Shit! Grissom and Sara? Together? No way!_

"I'll talk to you later Greg." Sara patted me on the knee, walking out the room past her fuming partner. I've never seen Grissom look at me with such green eyes of envy before. Then it hit me. This morning I told Nick that Sara had seen me naked. He was acting really strange and cold towards me after that! _Oh No! He thinks I've sex with Sara . . . and he's totally jealous!!! He does love me, that's why he freaked. Shit, I have to go find him._

I ran through the halls of the lab, hoping that Nick was back. I reached the garage lab seeing Nick printing a driver's side door. I took a deep breath then walked inside, startling him as the door clicked shut behind me. "Hi." I smiled to him. He looked away from me, continuing what he was doing. "Nick, you can't ignore me forever . . . well you could try, but I'll probably get on your nerves."

"Look Greg, I've..." He started but stopped mid sentence, still not able to look at me directly. He climbed to his feet, tossing some fingerprint strips onto the table behind him. "See the thing is..." He started again, slowly taking a few steps closer to me. "Although I like you Greg . . . I just don't like you, in that way. You get what I mean?"

"I guess, but you didn't even know I loved you when you were mad at me before. So what were you mad at me about? Was it about Sara seeing me naked?" Nick looked away from me, turning back to the car. "It wasn't in a sexual way, Nicky. We had to be showered down and disinfected at a crime scene from this flesh eating mould stuff."

"You're a scientist and you say 'mould stuff?" He chuckled slightly, looking round at me slightly relieved. "Greg it's not that..."

"But that's what you were mad at me about before though right?"

"No." He badly lied, dropping to the driver's seat of the car, printing the steering wheel.

"Then what was it? I say lots of things Nicky; I can barely remember half of the things I say, so you have to give me a hint or a slight clue."

"Look it doesn't matter okay. Can we please just drop it?" He asked, staring at me out of the front window of the car. "I'm really sorry Greg . . . I'm just not into guys. I'm sorry. Can we just drop it?" I nodded, leaning back against the wall behind me. _I never get used to rejection, you'd think with all the practice I've had it would be easier each time it happened._

"I told you if you don't feel the same way, I'd never bring it up again. And I won't." I added.

"Okay, thank you. Now can we get back to work?"

"Sure."

* * *

**Please Review.**

**Slightly shorter then the other chapters, but the next ones much longer and almost finished!**

**Poor Greg! Did you catch onto Nick's jealously when he thought Greg had been with Sara? What's gonna happen next? Got a few more exciting chapters for you still to come. I hope your still enjoying the story.**

**Thanks to Tish for beta-ing**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten:**

I got home first at the end of our never ending shift, clearing up the place a little then playing the messages on the answer machine from my mother before I jumped in the shower. I couldn't believe that conversation with Nick actually happened today; I held back my tears until now. I finally told him how I felt after all this time and he completely rejected me. Deep down I always knew it was going to happen like this, but it still came as such a shock to me. My body involuntary trembled under the gentle spray of the shower. I slid down the tiled wall and hugged my knees close to my chest as I cried into my knees.

_At least now I know._

Nick came home about two hours later. I was sat on the sofa in my pyjamas with a pot of ice-cream, watching TV when he walked in. He didn't say 'hello' like he usually does, let alone look at me just jumped straight in the shower then spent over an hour in his bedroom before he walked out to the sofa where I was laying, standing over me.

I looked up at him nervously. "What's up?" He dropped to the coffee table in front of me, looking into my eyes.

"Greg, I didn't mean to hurt your feelin's."

"You didn't." I huffed, licking the melted ice-cream for the spoon. "I won't bring it up again." I assured him.

"Greg whether we bring it up again or not, you're always goin' to be thinkin' about it and lookin' at me differently coz I'm the jerk that broke your heart..."

"This heart break was actually easier than the rest. I swear I won't ever bring it up again. I'm not expecting anything from you. If you're not into guys or . . . me, it doesn't matter. You'll still be my friend." He stared at me a moment then grabbed the remote from my lap to mute the TV.

"Okay that was a total lie." He shifted slightly closer, looking into my eyes.

"What was a total lie?" I asked confused.

"Okay . . . usually when I talk to girls about this sorta stuff, it's so much easier. I feel comfortable around them..."

"You don't feel comfortable around me?" I asked shifting slightly to sit cross legged on the sofa.

"No, it's not that. I . . . I just feel awkward. It was a total lie that I told you I'm not into guys."

"You mean you do?"

"Sometimes . . . yes. But Greg..."

"How can you only like guys sometimes?" I asked frowning at him.

"I don't know!" He almost shouted at me.

"How could you lie to _me_ like that? You're always shouting at me for being so dishonest, how could you lie to me like that?" I retorted.

"Because it's a really awkward thing to bring up in conversation." He explained, rubbing the back of his neck. "With girls it works, but guys . . . I just feel awkward, like it's not right."

"Awkward how?"

"Greg . . . I've never been with a guy before. I mean _never_. Never kissed or touched another guy even though I've been attracted to them so I was a teenager." He explained. "I've wanted to go out with guys . . . but I always feel awkward before I even . . . it just doesn't work okay. I'm into guys . . . I've even thought about you a couple of times."

"You have?" _Yes! My suspicions were absolutely right!_

"Okay please shut a second." He pleaded seeing me get excited. "I'm tryin' to explain my biggest secret here to you and it's really hard when you keep talkin'."

"Sorry, go ahead."

"Okay." He took a deep breath looking me in the eyes. "I'm attracted to guys, but I lean more towards girls. They're easier..."

"Just because you can get into their pants quicker?"

"Greg, could you please just shut up for five freakin' minutes!" He shouted. I nodded, playfully zipping my lips together then tossed a key over my shoulder. Nick's mouth spread into a wide grin as he rolled his eyes at me. "You're crazy, you know that G?" I nodded again keeping my lips tightly clamped shut. "Okay . . . If you let me finish, I meant they're easier as in, you don't get hassled for bein' with a girl coz it's completely normal and natural. I'm sorry, I can't be what you need Greg."

"Why not because I'm not a girl? That's a total bullshit excuse Nick, that's just like saying you won't date Sara because she has brown eyes."

"This is a little more complicated than your eye colour Greg."

"So you're happy going through your life with endless one night stands and a failed marriage on your record?"

"Greg..."

"Are you really happy with your life as it is Nicky?"

"Greg, just shut up!" He pleaded again. I clamped my lips shut, leaning back against the sofa cushions. "Greg I'm sayin' I can't. Bein' with guys is _very_ different from bein' with girls. Even if I do like you . . . I can't be with you Greg, not in that way. I can't be what you need." Nick clicked the volume back on the TV for me then walked off towards the kitchen to grab himself a coffee before I could speak again.

I climbed to my feet deciding not to give up just yet, setting the ice-cream tub down on the table. "Nicky, how can you give up on something you've never tried?" I asked leaning against the counter as he started to boil the kettle. "If you've never been with a guy then how can you be so quick to turn it down?"

"Greg, do you realise how much we'll be hassled at work?"

"Who's gonna know Nicky?" I asked, biting my lower lip slightly. "We don't have to tell anyone, it can just be between us."

"Greg, No. I can't . . . I just can't okay." He pushed past me grabbing a beer from the fridge then walked off to his room down the hall. I watched him go, anxiously gripping the counter behind me.

I walked back into the front room, throwing myself back onto the sofa cushions, trying to think. Nick really was a very heavily closeted gay man. He didn't say there was anything specifically wrong with being gay; he was just worried about being hassled by the guys at work. Since Warrick found out about me, he's never treated me differently. _Maybe I should tell Nick that? Or maybe he'll just be mad that Warrick knew about me before he did._

A few hours later I fell asleep on the sofa in front of the TV. Nick returned to the fridge to grab something to eat, startling me awake. "Sorry." He muttered, walking towards me. "Didn't mean to wake you."

"That's okay." I stretched out, sitting up to look at the time. "Don't you have a date?"

"I cancelled." _Again? He's always cancelling his dates now. _Nick sat down on the coffee table in front of me, watching me rubbing my eyes awake. "What are your plans today G?"

"Why?" I asked curiously, wondering if I was still dreaming.

"Well remember you said I could paint my room since I'm goin' to be livin' here a while?" I nodded wondering how drunk he was. "Why not today? You wonna help?"

"Is this your way of trying to make me feel better?"

"Kinda." He nodded. "Is it workin'?" I nodded giving him a smile. "Good, go get changed, I don't fancy walkin' round the store with a guy in pyjamas." He joked climbing to his feet.

I jumped to my feet, walking off down the hall to my room. I'm definitely awake and he's acting like nothing happened. In some ways . . . _that's worse!_

* * *

In the store I leant against the trolley, watching a married couple arguing over what colour to paint the kitchen. Even though they were arguing, the love was clearly there. I wanted that so badly. _Someone to love me for who I am._

"Hey, which colour do you think?" Nick asked, appearing with a pot of dark blue in one hand and dark green in the other.

"You might wonna consider getting out of the darks there cowboy." I suggested. "Don't you see enough darkness in your life?"

"So what I should get a white or yellow?" He asked cringing.

"Yuk . . . no way." I chuckled, rolling my eyes at him. Nick followed me towards some shelves stacked in slightly lighter coloured paint tins. "See this is more your style." I held up a lighter blue, watching his expression. "What?" I asked as he stared at me blankly.

"Nothin' . . . you recon this is the colour for me then?"

"Definitely."

"Now we need paint brushes and things." Nick took hold of the trolley, leading the way.

I shoved my hands in my pockets following him. This was as close as I was ever going to get to Nick. It made my chest ache with a pain I've never felt before, _and I didn't like it._

* * *

When we got back to the apartment, we sat down in front of the TV with our burritos we bought, eating together in silence.

"Okay, so you wonna paint the room now? We've got the day off tonight so we can sleep in then?" Nick suggested once he finished his second burrito.

"Sure." He grabbed the rubbish from my lap, taking it off to the kitchen to wash his hands.

"You wonna change your clothes first G?" He suggested.

"Okay." I climbed off the sofa heading to my room to change into some old clothes. Nick sat a moment longer then went to his room, moving his things out into the hall then covered his furniture and things with plastic sheets.

I wore an old pair of ripped jeans and a white t-shirt, watching Nick from the doorway as he stuck masking tape around the plugs and light switches. _He's such a perfectionist. _Each piece of tape had to be perfectly aligned before we could start.

He opened the tin of blue paint, handing me a tray and a roller. I watched as he skilfully poured me a small amount then handed it over. I flashed him a grin as I whirled around, starting on the wall opposite his bed. I could feel his eyes watching me, but I tried to concentrate on the wall knowing if I didn't do it right the _perfectionist_ might bite my head off.

He put some of his hick music on while we painted opposite walls in complete silence. Not the first thing most people do together after getting proof that the other one love's them, but Nick was a heavily closeted gay man with hundreds of bolts across his door after all, and completely in denial about it. He's probably convinced himself he's completely straight, even though he told me he's thought about being with guys since he was a teenager, _and me. I can't believe the man of my dreams has really thought about me in a sexual way. It's a dream come true . . . almost._

We stopped for some beers when two out of the four walls were done, sitting on the edge of Nick's plastic covered bed. "How come yours looks neater then my side?" I asked, turning to face him.

"Because you went in all directions, you're meant to go in straight vertical lines." Nick chuckled, nudging me with his elbow.

"Sor-ry Mr Perfectionist." I laughed, nudging him back.

"C'mon, let's get the other half done so we can do a second coat." He finished off his beer, pulling me to my feet. I dizzily bumped into him watching him smile. "Three beers and already your dizzy." He laughed. "Lightweight."

"I have a smaller body then you. It takes less alcohol to affect me." I explained, grabbing my paint tray again. "And I'm a Nordic Californian boy, you're a Texan jock."

"That's your explanation, huh?" He smirked. "Just make sure you paint the walls Einstein." He chuckled, returning to his paint tray to start on the wall behind me.

I turned sideways slightly to see Nick staring at me. He turned back to the wall, pretending he wasn't looking, continuing to paint again. I decided to mess with him a little as the alcohol was fuelling me now. First I fanned my face, pretending it was really hot in here. Nick noticed me straight away. He watched as I pulled my t-shirt up over my head, tossing it to his bed so it wouldn't get paint on it. I continued painting topless, occasionally looking sideways to see Nick gaping at me. I couldn't tell if he was looking at my figure, or the scars, even though he's seen them before. _But I loved his lustful gaze._

I purposely slicked my roller up with too much paint so a drip would drop to my chest as I lifted it. I caught Nick watching the glob of blue paint sliding down my flat chest towards my navel. I noticed he even had to bite his bottom lip, _probably to keep from moaning._ I slid my finger through the glob by my navel, wiping it to the edge of the tray then continued painting. He was obviously hard from the large bulge forming in the front of his tight jeans he always wears. I could see the discomfort in his eyes as he shifted his hips on the spot.

"I'm gonna go get another beer." Nick anxiously announced, heading out the room. I tried to hold in a laugh as he practically legged it out of the room. He returned a few minutes later, avoiding eye contact with me as he continued painting his side of the wall, chugging back his beer.

Once all the walls were painted, we stopped to play some X-box games while we waited for it to dry to add the second coat. Nick and I sat side by side on the sofa, chugging back beers as we raced each other on 'Need for Speed.'

"No!" Nick shouted, nudging me, trying to distract me as I overtook him. I laughed pushing him back, beating him to the finishing line.

"Yes!" I cheered victoriously. "You have to say it now." I laughed poking him in the chest.

"I never agreed I would."

"Yes you did." I laughed tickling him. "You promised me you'd say it if I won three times in a row!"

He rolled his eyes, huffing loudly. "Greg . . . you are The Master." He reluctantly said, pulling my hands away from his chest. "One more round?" He requested.

"Done, I am so going to beat you again!"

"Not on your best day Sanders." He laughed, starting up another match. He grabbed his beer off the table, chugging back the rest then leant back against the cushions of the sofa, right beside me.

Halfway through the race he started nudging me again, trying to distract me. I moved my controller out of his reach, concentrating on the race, overtaking him again, heading straight for the finish line. Nick tried to reach for my controller again, trying to make me crash, but I held it up over my head as he pushed me down onto the couch.

"You can't beat me Nicky." I laughed as he tickled me, crossing the finish line and winning again. "Yesss!" I cheered, looking up at him with a smug grin.

"That's so not fair." Nick pouted, still with his hands on my chest, holding me down on the sofa. "One more round?"

"I'm gonna beat you again Nicky, we'll be here all night." I chuckled.

"We'll swap cars this time, you drive mine." Nick restarted the race, handing me his controller. I handed over mine, sitting back on the sofa, ready for the race. Nick was desperately trying to control the car I made, steering it through the track. I knew his car was slightly slowly so I used the shortcuts, crashing into obstructions for Nick to crash into. "Hey, you cheated!" Nick protested in an almost childlike voice.

"It's not my fault they put these things in the game." I laughed, speeding towards the finish line. Nick tried to nudge me, distracting me again. I pushed him down onto the sofa, leaning across him to distract him. Nick rolled our bodies; we crashed to the carpet below with me underneath him, both staring at the television screen trying to beat the other.

"Yes!" Nick cheered, crossing the finish line. He sat up on my hips, laughing victoriously. "I told you I was gonna beat you!"

"What was that like one in five times? I'm still The Master." I declared, laughing. I placed the controller on the floor beside me, leaning up on my elbows, looking at Nick. His lips suddenly advanced closer to mine, completely surprising me. I opened my mouth more, allowing Nick's tongue to caress my own. Unlike Ryan's bitter tasting kiss, Nick tasted sweet. His warm tongue glided in my mouth, softly sucking on my lips. _It was the perfect kiss. The dream kiss! The kiss everyone searches for their whole lives . . . and I had finally found it._

Nick looked into my eyes, his lips just inches from mine. "Sorry." He panted, climbing off me, to sit on the edge of the sofa. I wanted to speak, but I completely froze up, laying on the floor still.

Nick sat a moment thinking, he suddenly climbed to his feet, grabbing his coat. I lay there just letting him walk right out of the apartment door.

I quickly scrambled to my feet, running after him. Unfortunately for me he went down in the elevator, the doors closed as I reached them, we're on the eighth floor and I had a few too many beers in me. I had to take the stairs down, running as fast as I could, using the rail to support myself in case I fell over then burst through the door at the bottom, seeing the empty elevator doors just reclosing. I frantically searched the lobby, seeing Nick was already on his way out the front door.

I ran after him, round to the parking lot, managing to wedge myself between his car door before he managed to close it. "Nicky..." I panted heavily. "Please... can we... talk about this?" I breathlessly asked.

"Greg, please step back." He simply said, avoiding eye contact with me.

"Please... Nicky, can we... just talk about... this a second?" I wheezed.

"No, I need some space. Back Up!" He demanded again. "Greg, please . . . don't make me push you."

"Nicky... why won't you just... talk to me? You kissed me!"

"Greg, I have to go! Would you just get out of the fuckin' way!" He yelled, clutching handfuls of his hair.

"Nicky you can't drive. You've had too much to drink." I simply explained. Nick rested his head on the steering wheel, panting heavily as he realised I was right. "I can't let you drive out of here Nick." I watched him a moment then saw a tear rolling gently down his cheek. "Nicky, what's wrong?"

"I don't want this to happen. I've fought so hard. I can't let it happen." He sobbed.

"Fought so hard to what?" I asked the emotional drunk.

"I don't want you, I don't!" He held his head in his hands, sobbing quietly.

"Why did you kiss me then?" I asked.

"Because I wanted to." He started to tremble slightly. This was it, finally it. Nick had taken a step out of that sealed vault of his and his world was shattering to pieces around him.

"You wanted to kiss me?"

"Yes." He blubbered, looking up at me with his puffy red eyes and tear stroked cheeks. "I'm sorry." He wept softly. "I can't be what you need Greg . . . I'm not gay." _The kiss says otherwise!_

"Nicky, you don't have to be gay to like me."

"But I don't wonna be gay." I looked at him in awe. I've never seen Nick look so vulnerable before.

"Nicky your still you..."

"I just kissed my best friend though." He sobbed, clutching his head.

"Nick, being gay isn't a choice. It's who you are. It's nothing to be ashamed off."

"If that's true then why did you hide it from me?" He asked.

"I wasn't so much ashamed . . . I was just keeping my sexuality secret. Just like husbands and wives do, playing around with dominatrix stuff behind closed doors." He half smiled, looking out at me. "Nicky you can't choose to be gay . . . you just are or you aren't."

"But I haven't given into it . . . ever . . . until today."

"You were still gay before, even if you never kissed or touched a guy."

"How can I know for sure though?"

"Only you know the answer to that Nick. Would you prefer to kiss me again or Starla?" Nick rested his head back on the steering wheel. His facial expression said it all, but I still didn't get an answer. "Do you regret kissing me?" I asked shoving my hands in my pockets. He wiped his eyes, looking up at me then shook his head. "And how did it feel? Did it feel wrong?" Nick shook his head again, sniffing back his tears. "How can something that felt so good be something so terrible then?"

"I don't know." He whimpered softly. "My family would kill me if they found out I did that."

"They'd probably kill you if they found out you destroyed your marriage with Scarla too."

"Star-la." Nick corrected, chuckling softly. "I still haven't told them about the divorce either."

"Nick . . . your parents don't have to know. Do you tell them who else you've kissed or tell them all about the sex with all those girls."

"No."

"Exactly . . . so you don't exactly have to tell them this."

"Greg . . . I can't be with you."

"I'm not asking you to be. You kissed me." I reminded him. "C'mon Nicky . . . come back inside." I took a step back, watching him shakily step out of his truck, pushing the door shut then locking it behind him.

"I really kissed you didn't I?" He asked in drunken daze.

"Yeah you did." I smiled slightly. "C'mon, we gotta do a second coat of paint."

"Okay . . . I need another beer." He muttered, rubbing his eyes. I helped him back into the apartment building. We both leant against the elevator wall as the lift took us back up to our floor, neither one of us looking at each other for the whole ride up.

When we returned to the apartment, Nick grabbed two beers, handing me one of them then dropped to the sofa, chugging back his beer, looking on at the television screen still replaying his victory lap.

I leant against the breakfast counter watching him. I couldn't believe he actually kissed me. Now he doesn't want to be with me because he doesn't want to be gay. _A very lame excuse, but I'd accept it_.

"Wonna paint the second layer now?" Nick asked, finishing his beer within seconds to grab another, probably trying to scrub away the taste of me from inside him. I nodded following him back down the hall to his room.

Nick set his beer down on the cabinet. He sat on the edge of his bed, looking up at me stood in his doorway. "What?" I asked, self consciously folding my arms across my chest.

"I probably made this ten times harder for you by kissin' you." Nick said softly.

"I'll chalk it up to the beers you drank." I stepped into the room, going for the paint pot to fill my tray back up. As I stood up again, I felt his presence behind me. I felt his hand linger across my back, his warm breath on my neck. "Nicky don't." I turned around to push him back slightly. "Don't touch me unless you mean it." I pleaded. I didn't know if I could handle him breaking my heart over this. A kiss I could almost let go of, but physical contact was a little harder to forget.

"Do you really love me Greg?" He whispered softly.

"I really do." I nodded. Nick took the paint tray from my hands, setting it down on one of the plastic covered cabinets.

"No one's ever loved me before Greg." He stuffed his hands in his pockets, scanning his eyes across me.

"Well I do . . . I have for a while. I'm not asking you to be with me Nick . . . I just have to know . . . if you really don't want me." Nick stood in silence, only his eyes were moving across my figure, back towards my eyes.

"I've never been so confused in my entire life."

"Why confused?"

"Because on the one hand . . . I want to touch you." He said looking into my eyes with his, making me melt. "But on the other . . . I don't want to."

"Touch me where?" I asked.

"Greg I can't."

"What's your reason not to?" I took a step closer, taking his left hand in mine, placing it at my hip. "What's your reason not to keep touching me Nicky?" I rasped, looking up into his eyes.

"If I touch you . . . I'll be gay."

"You're gay no matter what you do Nick. You were born that way." I smiled softly. I took his limp right hand, running it under the rim of my t-shirt to softly caress my smooth stomach. "What's your excuse now?" I rasped against his lips.

"I'm drunk."

"You're not that drunk." I let go of his hands, looking up into his eyes. "You can make the decision yourself to go any further." He slowly slid his right hand up slightly, lifting my t-shirt to reveal my bare chest. He stared at the blue stained mark on my chest, from the paint glob that ran down me earlier.

I could tell he was still nervous, watching his lower lip quivering slightly. His fingertips brushed the sides of my chest, leaving faint blue marks, from the paint transfer of the tray he touched. He sank his mouth to my neck, softly kissing and sucking. He gently pushed me back against the wall, colliding my warm flesh with the cold layer of paint.

"See, doesn't feel so bad, huh?" I asked. Nick shook his head, sliding his hands under my t-shirt to lift it up over my head. My skin hummed with excitement as he feathered his fingertips down the centre of my chest, tracing the slight curves of my muscles.

"No . . . not so bad." He took a step back, removing his fingers from my chest. "I want to kiss you." He nervously spoke.

"Go ahead." I rasped. Nick took a step closer, placing his left hand on my shoulder as he softly pressed our lips together. He panted his warm breath across my lips before he started kissing me passionately. His hand on my bare shoulder, moved up towards my neck to cup my cheek in his strong hand.

"No . . . I can't." He pulled back slightly, resting his forehead against mine.

"What's your excuse?" I asked looking into his eyes as he continued to pant his sweet seductive breath across my lips.

"I feel dizzy."

I smiled against his lips. "You wonna move to the bed so you don't fall over?"

"Okay." Nick slid his hands down my arms to lace his fingers with mine. He took a few steps back towards the bed, pulling his own t-shirt off, tossing it over his shoulder. I'd seen him topless before, but never this close. He was even more gorgeous then I ever could have imagined. Especially when he pressed his chest against mine, pawing his fingers through my hair as he joined our lips for our third kiss.

"I don't want to..." He nervously spoke, pulling apart.

"We don't have to do that." I assured him. "There are others things we can do." I whispered softly. I slowly lowered my tattered jeans to the floor stepping out of them, pushing them across the floor with my foot.

Watching me remove my jeans made Nick do the same with his. He guided me towards his plastic covered mattress; carefully pushing me back then crawled on beside me, trailing his blue fingertips from my thigh to my neck where he rejoined our lips once again.

Nick slowly broke the kiss, looking into my eyes. "I can touch you anywhere, right?" I nodded watching his blue coated his fingers trailing down my chest leaving a trail to the waistband of my boxers. I loved his new found confidence as he explored my body with his blue fingers, marking my chest with kisses then brushing his fingertips gently across the wet area. He circled his tongue around one of my nipples, softly biting the nub then looked me in the eyes. "I love your flat chest G." He rasped.

"Yeah? Finally in a relationship where you have bigger boobs then your partner." I teased him.

"They're not boobs Sanders, they're pecks." He corrected with a wide grin. He leant on his elbow, looking at my chest and neck covered in a faint blue trail of paint.

"What do you want to do to me now?" I asked him, rolling to my side to face him.

"I don't know." He anxiously bit his lip, looking around the room in a paranoid stance. "Greg, I can't do this."

"Stop." I held him in place on the bed before he ran for the door again. "What are you so afraid of Nick? No one will know." I whispered softly.

"I'll know."

"Nick, do you want to be miserable the rest of your life?"

"Greg, please just stop."

"I didn't force you to do anything Nicky. You touched me out of your own freewill..."

"It was wrong." He scrambled off the bed, clutching his head in his hands. I remained on the bed hoping he'd change his mind.

"Here." I reached for his paint tray, grabbing the paint brush, placing it in his hands. "If you don't want to touch me yourself . . . that's fine. Use this." He looked at the paint brush in his hands then watched me lay back on the bed with my eyes closed. I figured the less eye contact the easier it would be for him, and I was right. Within a few seconds I felt the soft bristles of the paint brush, tickling their way up my leg towards my thigh. I gave out a soft moan, curling my fists into balls at my sides as the cold blue paint stuck to my skin. I felt the mattress shift slightly as he eased himself back on, caressing the brush across my stomach.

I gasped under the touch, arching my chest towards it. He continued across my chest, erupting a few more soft moans and gasps from my lips. I felt his fingertips across my navel again, desperately fighting for control over my body. I kept my eyes closed, feeling his mouth against mine, kissing me softly. His tongue danced with mine, softly nibbling on my lips as he deepened another kiss, sucking my tongue into his mouth.

He trailed the paint brush across my chest again, making me shiver slightly. I had never felt like this with anyone in bed before and all he was doing was brushing a paintbrush across my body along with the gentle brush of his finger tips now and then.

As his confidence started to increase, he worked a trail of kisses across my exposed body then returned to my lips, sucking my tongue into his mouth again. I loved the pure sweet taste of him, and he was such an amazing kisser, sending tingles of ecstasy throughout my body.

"Open your eyes." He whispered softly. I did as instructed, looking up into his big brown lustful eyes. "Do you want to touch me?" He asked, swirling a fingertip around my navel. I nodded then watched as he lay back on the bed beside me, getting into a comfy position.

I slowly rolled to my side to face him. He gave me a nod to let me know he was ready. I kissed his forehead, eyelids, nose, slowly moving down to his cheeks, lips and chin, kissing a trail across his jaw line, watching his eyes fluttering and gentle moans escaping his throat.

I licked and kissed a line to his nipple, gently blowing on the cold saliva trail, making him shiver slightly. He gave out another moan as my mouth closed over his nipple, gently sucking it until the nub rose under my tongue. I scoured my tongue across his broad chest to do the same to the other one. Never had I been in bed with a man that really took care of his body before.

Nick whimpered, arching his chest up as my tongue swirled down the middle his chest, circling his navel then stopping at the rim of his boxers. I kissed a line up the centre of his chest again, returning to his mouth, engaging in a lusty deep kiss as I slipped my hand below his waist for the first time to hold his hip. He moaned softly, arching his chest up towards mine.

"Greg . . . stop." He gasped, curling his fists into balls at his sides. I brought my mouth to his ear, gently nibbling on his lobe.

"What do you want me to do, Nicky?" I whispered softly. His body shuddered slightly as I lay flat on top of him, our hardened erections gently brushing. Nick clenched his eyes shut a moment, biting his bottom lip as he tried to control himself.

"Get off me." He opened his eyes to look up at me. I climbed off him, sitting on the bed beside him. "I'm sorry Greg." He whimpered apologetically, covering his hands over his eyes. It wasn't until I heard him sniffle that I realised he was crying.

"Nicky, what's wrong?" I lay on my side, watching him.

"My chest hurts."

"Why?"

"Because I want you . . . but I can't allow myself to have you." He explained, wiping the tears from his eyes to look up at me. "I have this achin' pain inside of me every time I turn you down."

"There's a simple cure." I smiled softly.

"What's that then Einstein?"

"Don't turn me down." I smiled wider.

He smiled back, wiping the tears from his face again. "I feel sleepy." Nick leant up on his elbows, looking around the room, before returning his gaze to me. "Greg could you . . . could you lie with me?"

"Sure." I nodded. He wrapped his arms around my body, pulling me against his own. I rested my head on his shoulder, circling my arm around his chest.

"Thanks Greg." He whispered softly, pressing a kiss to my forehead.

* * *

**Please Review**

**I watched Jurassic Park, The Lost World and Jurassic Park 3 adjusting this. So if I mentioned dinosaurs anyway I'm sorry lol. No Beta this time, I wanted to get the chapter to you as soon as I could. I hope you enjoy it. This is like the fourth version of this chapter and I think its the best one of the story so far.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven:**

I twitched my eyes open, smelling the deep fragrances of coffee wafting up my nostrils. The first blink everything was blurred. I blinked a second time to see a coffee mug floating across my head. I turned my head slightly to see Nick lying on his side, wearing nothing but sweat pants. "Hi." I mumbled sleepily.

"Hi." He said back, smiling widely at me.

"I thought you would be running from the hills by now." I stretched slightly on the plastic sheet beneath me, feeling my sweaty skin sticking against it.

"I thought about it." Nick confessed. "But when I saw you beside me suckin' your thumb, I wanted to stay." He smiled softly.

"I do not suck my thumb." I protested.

Nick broke into a wider grin, giggling softly. "Yeah you do, and you look adorable." He snickered. "I made you a coffee." I leant up on my elbows, taking it from his hands.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome." Nick climbed to his feet, grabbing his coffee off the side. He sat on the window ledge opposite me, slowly sipping his coffee. After a long moments silence, Nick finally spoke up again, looking down into his coffee mug. "Look Greg . . . we have to talk."

"I know." I huffed, knowing what was coming. It was a speech I've heard millions of times, but I never get used to hearing. I sat up straight on the edge of the mattress, watching him trying to find his words. "Is this the part where you tell me you're not looking for a relationship right now; I was just there when you needed somebody and we really shouldn't make a big thing of it?"

"No, that's not what I was goin' to say." Nick shook his head, looking up at me. "Not by a long shot."

I looked up at him with wide eyes of surprise. "It's not?"

"No." Nick set down his coffee on the side, crawling back onto the bed beside me, trailing a smooth fingertip from the rim of my boxers to the centre of my chest. "I was gonna say . . . I'm sorry for rejectin' you."

"You are?" Nick smiled softly giving me a nod. "So you remember all of it?"

"Yep . . . I remember . . . but we didn't." Nick lowered his voice to a whisper. "You... we didn't um..."

"Have sex?" I chuckled that he couldn't say it. "No we didn't."

Nick sighed in relief. "I just mean if we did. I'd want to remember . . . not because I wouldn't want to." He bit his lip looking at me. "And I can't believe I just said that." He rolled onto his back to face the ceiling.

I sipped my coffee silently, watching him trying to think. "So whaddya say we get the second coat of this room painted?" I suggested to help him through the awkwardness.

"Even though half of it's on your body?" He chuckled. "I thought I woke up next to a smurf this mornin'." He giggled, rolling to face me.

"All I'm missing is the hat." I grinned at him as I was wearing white boxers. "Did you want breakfast first?" Nick looked at me, softly biting his bottom lip, waiting with baited breath. I desperately wanted to kiss him again to taste his sweet seductive lips, but I didn't want to rush him into it. I was just glad that he didn't run screaming from the room when he woke up next me.

"Breakfast sounds good." He nodded.

"I can make us some of my Nana Olaf's waffles." I sat up on the bed, going to climb to my feet when he grabbed my wrist, pulling me back towards him. I held my coffee mug steady, trying not burn either one of us or spill a drop of the glorious liquid. _That sounds completely pathetic, but I love my coffee!_

Nick slowly pressed his lips to mine, softly licking the inside of my mouth to tease my lips open more. _Mmmm... On second thought. I love my coffee taste right from Nick's tongue!_

Nick slid one hand down my bare side, towards my hip while the other cupped my cheek, kissing me passionately.

"Ouch." I yelped, pulling back as the hot coffee poured down my arm.

"Shit! Sorry, are you okay?" Nick grabbed his t-shirt drying the scolding hot liquid from my arm.

"No, that's half a cup of coffee I'll never get back." I moaned making him laugh.

"How's the arm then genius?"

"That's fine." _Besides my ego being bruised. Our first morning kiss . . . Late afternoon kiss technically and I spill coffee all over us. _"So... Nana Olaf's waffles?"

"Sure, why not." He smiled, giving me a quick peck on the lips as he climbed to his feet. I sighed a deep breath of pure happiness, watching him standing up. The muscles in his back flexed luxuriously in all the right places. "Greg, you're gonna spill your coffee again." Doh! _Note to self, don't hold a coffee when looking at the man of my dreams._

I straightened the coffee mug, giving him a wide grin as I climbed to my feet. "I'm gonna check my messages." He signalled, holding up his phone. I nodded walking out his room towards mine. I grabbed some sweat pants from my room, snapping them in place then retreated to the kitchen to dab my arm with some cold water to stop the throbbing, while Nick checked his phone messages, probably from Starla. Five minutes as Nick's _possible boyfriend _and the ex is already getting in the way. _At least he'll be mine for the rest of the day! _I smiled happily beginning to clean up the beer bottles across the counter that Nick had cleared out of his bedroom. _I don't remember drinking all of these. I think most of them were Nick's, maybe that's why he was so confident yesterday. _Besides the momentary freak outs that is. _And now I'm making my boyfriend breakfast!_

_Yesss! _I broke into a goofy grin as I got what I needed from the fridge, kicking it shut with my foot, when the phone suddenly started to ring. I pressed the phone to my ear against my shoulder, while I started to make our breakfast. "Hello?"

"_Hello sweetheart, only me." _My mother's voice sang through the phone. "_Just calling to check in with you..."_

"As I forgot yesterday. I know, I'm sorry. I'm still alive and safe and still not working in the field or seeing Ryan anytime soon." I assured her as those are her constant questions whenever she rings me lately. _You'd think at the age of 29 I wouldn't have to update my mother daily on my life._ I'm going to have to find a way to tell her that I actually took up a field position soon though. It's not a very easy thing to break to your mother, _especially when it's my mother._

"_Okay sweetheart. Next time you could tell me without the attitude though!" _She scolded me. "_Do you have a date for the wedding yet? Because Marion and Jason are bringing their daughter Hannah with them, you remember Hannah, right?"_

"No mom, I don't remember Hannah and I have no idea who Marion and Jason are." _She always assumes I know her friends by name. She has millions of them and she seriously expects me to remember their names?_

"_You know the one with the poodle that ate your hamster."_

"Oh . . . her!" _Yes I remember her. Nine years old I'm finally allowed a pet. The first day I get my hamster, my dear mother invites a 'friend' over to play. A friend I didn't even know at the time. The bitch ended up bringing her poodle and it ate my damn hamster. I didn't even have time to name the little ball of fluff and I was never allowed a pet again! _"Mom, I haven't seen her for years. And you know how much I hate blind dates."

"_You've got to let this grudge against her go Gregory. It's not her fault her dog ate your hamster."_

"No, but she didn't exactly apologise either. And as I recall she was a very large girl, no thanks mom, I can pick my own dates."

"_Yeah and look where that got you!" _I leant back against the counter, hearing the anger in her voice. "_I'm sorry sweetheart. I didn't mean that . . . but I'm so worried about you. You've been so down on love the past few years, since your little incident..."_

"My little incident? It was a lab explosion!"

"_Yes and that shit for brains bimbo tried to kill you..."_

"She didn't try to kill me." I looked up as Nick emerged from his bedroom, making his way towards the kitchen to wash out his coffee mug. "And she's not a shit for brains bimbo mom." Nick looked at me funny as I said that.

"_She is, she tried to kill you with her stupid mistake and you would have never seen your 27__th__ birthday!"_

"Well I did so would you just drop it?" I poured the waffle mixture into the waffle iron, turning it on. "They're taking every precaution to ensure that there's not another lab explosion." Nick leant against the counter watching me. "I'll talk to you later mom."

"_But honey, you need to bring a date to the wedding. Hannah's not so bad. She has a law degree you know."_

"Have you seen her lately then?"

"_No, but Marion showed me a picture the other day . . . she's not that big sweetheart."_

"What's your version of not that big? Bridget Jones or Professor Klump?" Nick gave me another frown.

"_I'd say slightly bigger then Bridget Jones."_

"No thank you. Goodbye Mom." I hung up the phone then looked at Nick's confused gaze. "Mom trying to set me up on a blind date." I explained.

"Oh, I know how that feels." He chuckled slightly. _I thought it was maybe a little too soon in our relationship to ask Nick to be my plus one to the wedding. If we are even in a relationship at the moment? I never thought to ask, which is odd because usually I can't stop talking!_

I served up our waffles with another cup of coffee, sitting right beside Nick on the sofa with our feet up on the coffee table. We watched the most boring daytime television to ever feature in complete silence as we ate.

"Mmm, these are delicious G." Nick smacked his lips as he finished off the last bite.

"You can thank Nana Olaf for teaching me how to cook that." I grinned back.

"Are your Nana and Papa Olaf still alive G?" Nick asked curiously, turning slightly on the sofa to look me in the eyes. "You're always talkin' about them."

"No." I shook my head looking down at my hands. "My Papa Olaf passed when I left for college, my Nana a couple of months after. They really couldn't live without each other."

We both sat in a moment of silence, listening to the commercials on the television.

"Okay Greg." Nick set down his plate, turning completely to face me on the sofa as he turned off the TV. "You were right yesterday when you said livin' an okay life wasn't good enough. I do want more from my life . . . but I've worked so hard on my career and tryin' to appear as a straight man that I actually haven't been carin' about my own happiness."

"So what are you gonna do about it?" I asked curiously, hoping I was somewhere in this plan of his.

"I don't know yet. All I know is that I can't stop thinkin' about you since you woke me from that nightmare then you laid in bed beside me coz I asked you to. I've been thinkin' about your for years . . . but it didn't really hit me until then." He blushed.

"Thinking about me in what way?" I queried, setting down my plate to sit cross legged facing him. Nick tensed up into his protective shell again, nervously biting his lip. "Don't worry . . . you don't have to tell me."

"I want to be able to though. I mean deep down . . . you're the only one I want." My pulse skyrocketed through the roof. _I've always wanted someone to say that to me._ "But I don't know if I can be what you want Greg . . . or even how. The sex stuff and the physical stuff . . . I don't know if I could ever get used to that, it still really freaks me out to think about it." _But he has thought about it._

"I won't rush you Nicky . . . as I said before; I'm looking for a relationship not a screw. People only ever see me as a sex toy; it might be nice to actually be with someone who wants to be with me for my company." I told him, looking down at my hands in my lap again. "And for the record, sex with you isn't at the top of my list."

"One of the ladies tell you I was terrible?" He managed to joke.

"No." I chuckled. "I want to be in a relationship with you Nick, snuggling on the couch, hand holding, spooning in bed . . . that sorta stuff. I've never had that before . . . so we won't do anything you're not comfortable with."

"Okay." Nick sighed again with relief. "I want all of that stuff you said too. I may have been round the block, but the ladies only want me for sex or my body. Starla hated my jokes, my love of football, seems like half our relationship she was naggin' me to change my personality. And she didn't even like my friends. I just have one condition though, I know it's gonna sound a little harsh . . . but I can't let anyone know about me, especially not my family or Warrick. They wouldn't understand."

"I think Warrick might be a little more understanding then you think." I half smiled. "That's fine by me anyway. I only just came out to my mom, I don't know if she told my dad yet . . . and no one really knows about me at work. So that's fine with me."

"It's not that I'm ashamed Greg." He rushed to clarify.

"I know what you're going through Nick. I may have been out slightly longer then you . . . but I know how it feels. My first make out session with a guy I threw up three times, it might have been because his god awful breath though." He laughed at me shaking his head. "You actually took your first gay kiss better than me." Nick blushed, leaning back against the sofa cushions to avoid eye contact with me. "So out of curiosity Nicky." Nick looked round at me again. "Are you more attracted to guys or girls?"

"I don't know." Nick placed his hands on his knees, sighing heavily. "I guess... well I've never really been with a guy, but growin' up . . . you know since puberty, I've only ever really thought about guys." Nick anxiously bit his lip. "I've been with girls . . . but there's nothin' really there . . . you know what I mean?"

"Yep," I nodded. "Except with me I've been attracted to girls and guys since puberty. I've never really been in a proper relationship with guys though. It's hard to find guys that want a relationship, the only place you can really find gay guys for sure is a gay bar and all they want is sex. None of them ever want a relationship."

"So... out of curiosity . . . for me," Nick half smiled. "How many guys have you . . . been with?"

"I can count them on one hand." I held up three fingers, watching his reaction. "I bet you can't even count all the women you've been with on all your fingers and toes." I smirked.

"Okay . . . I deserved that." He chuckled. "So you like girls and guys? But you love me?" I nodded watching his cheeks blush brightly red again. "Why do you love me Greg?"

"Because you're you Nicky, you're my best friend . . . you don't treat me like a complete dork and you actually like my company, or at least I think you do..."

"I do." He smiled at me. _Calm down Greg. _I tried to control myself from squealing excitedly.

"Good. I like you for who you are, what you say, the way you talk, your personality, your body." I grinned making him blush. "Not only are you my best friend, but you're the only person I've ever fallen in love with."

Nick sighed heavily, chomping on his lower lip. "It feels so weird to be so inexperienced in somethin'." He chuckled softly. "It's like goin' through my first time again at the age of 33."

"It's not really that much different. You've had backdoor sex with girls before right?" Nick awkwardly nodded. "It's basically the same then, not that I'm expecting sex to be our first activity together." Nick blushed an even brighter shade of red. "You know there's plenty of other stuff we can try first."

"Okay, can we talk about somethin' else now?" He pleaded with puppy dog eyes. _So adorable!_

"Did you wonna finish painting or..." I grabbed the X-box controller that had been stuffed under the coffee table. "You wonna get beat by The Master again?" I chuckled playfully wiggling my eyebrows at him.

"You're goin' down Sanders." Nick crawled across the floor to turn the console and television back on, returning to the sofa beside me.

"Wonna bet?" I teased.

"What do you wonna bet?" He asked, turning to look at me.

"If I win . . . you have to do something I really want."

"I don't think we should bet sex into the pot." Nick nervously bit his lip.

"Who said I wanted sex? For all you know it could be a kiss." I grinned at him.

"Okay done, if I win you have to do somethin' I want." He grinned back. We shook hands sealing the deal then selected our cars and the race track, starting up the first match. We started playfully nudging each other again as we approached the end of the track. I slid my fingers down the bareness of Nick's chest causing him to flinch slightly and I won again.

"Yesss!"

"You cheated." He protested with a giggling laughter.

"You used all the short cuts." I laughed back, poking him in the side. "Now where's my prize?" I asked licking my lips looking at his parted lips. He nervously poked his tongue out to wet his lips then leant over my crossed legs to kiss me softly with his waffle tainted breath. He kissed me until he was out of breath, panting across my lips then started kissing me again. His kiss was like pure ecstasy. _I was in heaven!_

"There... how's that?" He panted.

"I think we shoulda added these prizes years ago." I smiled against his lips.

"Yeah, but we played with Warrick back then." Nick laughed. "I think I'd be a little jealous if I saw you French kissin' him."

"Are you the jealous type Nicky?"

"Definitely." He rasped, softly sucking my lower lip as he looked into my eyes. "This feels incredibly weird, but normal."

"Feels perfect to me."

"Another round? I'm so gonna beat you this time Sanders." He chortled, moving back to the sofa in front of me.

"That's what you think, Stokes!" I laughed. "I've got a left nipple waiting to be sucked." I teased him, watching the adorable blush on his face. Nick uncomfortably leant back against the sofa as the race started. I watched him intensely biting his tongue as he was trying to concentrate on winning the race. I decided to be a bit of a reckless driver this time around, allowing him to win by mere seconds.

"Yesss!" Nick cheered then looked round at my smiling face.

"What is it you wish of me?" I rasped, playfully wiggling my eyebrows.

"This." Nick set down his controller then assaulted the tender bareness of my chest with his fingers. I giggled and squirmed, turning into desperate girl squeals of gasps and begging trying to get him to stop. "Because you keep teasin' me, Sanders!" He laughed continuing his assault of my exposed skin.

"No... Stop... Pleaseeee..." I giggled, trying to stop his hands. Nick finally stopped, watching me panting with bright red cheeks and a wide smile on my face.

"Another round?" He asked with a wide grin.

"Sure. I won't _let_ you win this time."

"You didn't let me win, I won fair and square." He protested.

"Really?" I chuckled getting poked in the ribs again. "Maybe I wanted you to win to see what you wanted me to do?"

"I'll prove it, I'll win again then you'll pay Sanders." He laughed restarting the game.

"That's what you think." I teased him.

I won the next round, watching the poor little puppy dog expression wipe across Nick's face. "Time for my big prize." I grinned, inching closer to him, slowly straddling his thighs. Nick anxiously bit his lip, watching what I was doing. "Don't look so nervous Nicky."

"But I am nervous Greg. I've never acted on my sexuality, let alone admitted to it . . . besides to you that is."

"Just relax." I whispered, brushing my lips across his ear, softly nibbling on his lobe.

"Whoa Greg," Nick stopped my hand as it slid south of his waist. "I can't allow you to do that." Even though I felt his body hardening beneath me, I stopped.

"Why not?" I asked softly kissing his very masculine jaw line.

"I-I... er... I..." He sweetly stammered. "I can't think of a good enough reason." He chuckled slightly with embarrassment. "Just please stop a second." I sat back on his thighs, doing as requested. "Greg . . . I really like you . . . but I don't know if I can . . . you know, be what you need. You know the romance stuff."

"The 'romance stuff' gets easier the more you try it, Nicky. I never even though you'd ever kiss me, but you did." I smiled looking at him. "You do want to be with me don't you?" I insecurely asked.

"I do, I defiantly do . . . but, can we just please take it slow . . . real slow, like snail's pace?" He requested sweetly.

"Done, I want you to feel comfortable with me Nick."

"I do . . . sort of. You just have to give me some time to adjust. Here." Nick scooted himself back against the arm of the chair, turning me in his arms to sit with my back against his bare chest. "This feels more comfortable." He whispered against my ear, making me shiver then dispensed a soft kiss to my neck. "Whaddya say two more rounds then we get on with the paintin'?"

"You're on, prepare to be beaten Stokes." I chuckled.

He wrapped his arms around my waist, resting his controller on my lap. I leant right back against his chest, feeling his heart beat against me and his warm breath across my neck making it very difficult to concentrate.

I managed to overtake Nick in the last leg of the track, when he suddenly started to assault my exposed stomach with his fingers again. I giggled, squirming against his chest as I tried to keep control of my car, trying to win the race. "No... Stop..." I shrieked, continuing to squirm.

"Yesss!" Nick laughed as I totalled my car. "I win!" He shouted victoriously.

"You cheated."

"Yeah but you still get the prize." Nick tilted my head back across his shoulder, gently caressing my lips with his own. As he broke apart I licked my lips, savouring the sweetness of Nick's lips. "See... I'm just gettin' used to that." He panted across my lips.

"Well for a beginner you're very experienced." I grinned.

"I'll take that as a compliment." He smiled softly. "You're an amazin' kisser yourself there G. And I have never seen you speechless before." He chuckled.

"Doesn't happen very often, but this is the very first time a kiss felt so fantastic."

"Couldn't agree with you more."

* * *

**Please Review**

**Nick's trying his best to accept Greg without breaking his heart. I hope you're not too bored with the slow pace.**

**Thanks to Tish for beta-ing**


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve:**

"Greg!" Nick shouted from my bedroom door. I slowly opened my eyes, yawning widely. "Greg, c'mon man, get up!" I choked on something in my mouth realising it was my thumb. _Huh?! I guess I do suck my thumb. _I pulled my thumb out of my mouth, sitting up slightly to look at Nick at the foot of my bed. He was already fully dressed and showered. He must have climbed out of bed with me and got ready by himself. _At least he's still talking to me. Maybe he didn't freak out too bad waking up next to me._ "C'mon get up, we gotta go to work." He shouted again, tapping his watch.

"Okay." I slightly nodded then felt really dizzy and sleepy again. "Five minutes, okay?" I muttered, rolling back under the covers reclosing my eyes.

"Greg, C'mon." Nick walked closer to the side of my bed, shaking me softly. "We can't be late. Griss said it's a busy night tonight."

"I'm still sleepy though." I mumbled, pulling the covers back to my chin.

"Greg, you gotta shower coz you're still covered in paint and you haven't eaten since our breakfast yesterday." Nick shook me again, trying to pull the covers down from my chin. "C'mon G, wake up buddy." He sat down on the edge of the bed, shaking me slightly.

"I'm not a morning person." I groaned, easing my eyes open to look up at him.

"I noticed." He chuckled, tickling my stomach through my pyjamas. "C'mon get up. I'll make you some breakfast while you jump in the shower and fix your hair."

"Do I get a cup of coffee too?"

"Only if you're out of bed in the next ten seconds, I might even throw in a kiss." He teased. I immediately sat up, sweeping back the covers watching a wide grin spread across Nick's face. "Knew I could tempt you." He chortled, pressing his lips to mine, softly sucking and licking in all the right places, reminding me what his luxurious kisses were like. Unfortunately he pulled back too soon though. "Go on shower, I'll make you a coffee and some pancakes." He said, quickly heading out the bedroom door.

I climbed off the bed slowly, stumbling down the hall to the bathroom to start scrubbing the paint from my body. In the shower I looked at all the blue marks across my stomach and chest, remembering Nick's exploration of my body the first night. He was so adorable and insecure at the same time. Something I've never experienced in Nick before. Last night however he only agreed to sleep in my room, in my bed with me because of the paint fumes in his room. He did cuddle up to me though, so I guess he's trying to get used to the idea of having a boyfriend. We were both fully clothed too which I'm sure helped him relax more. I wanted to make this process for him as easy as I could, but at the same time I'm worried that my heart will be broken somewhere down the line. Either he'll want to remain in his closet forever; convincing everyone around him he's still straight or once he's locked that door behind him he's going to realise I'm not the best catch there is in the gay world and he's going to experiment with other men until he finds the one perfect for him! _God I hope that doesn't happen. _Even thinking about it brought tears to my eyes.

I emerged from the shower a few minutes later, wrapping a towel around my waist as I dried my hair by the sink, spiking my bleached streaks up with my hair gel when I noticed Nick at the open door watching me. He must have opened it while the hair dryer was on, because it was definitely closed before then and I have a habit of not locking bathroom doors. _My mother's fault, scarred for life because of her. Try not to think about it._ "What?" I asked Nick as he was staring at me. _He's probably changing his mind right this very second. Damn, I wish I had gone to the gym more!_

"You take forever to do your hair." He chuckled, walking in to lean against the sink beside me.

"You don't like it?" I asked, sticking up the last bleached spike on my head.

"I love it." He smiled at me. "Makes you look truly unique." I noticed he wasn't looking at my hair when he said it though; he was looking at my bare dripping wet chest. _Unique, huh? Is that good or bad?_

He ran his eyes across my bare chest again, working his way up to my eyes. "What?" I smiled at him, feeling as though he was having total eye sex with my body right now.

"Nothin'," He sighed heavily, looking down at the ground. "I just . . . I can't believe yesterday happened." He muttered, shoving his hands into his pockets.

"Which part?"

"All the teasin' and kissin' . . . it's like bein' a teenager again." He chuckled softly. "You know I've wanted to be able to touch you for years, now you're finally my boyfriend, and I'm too scared to touch you. I feel pathetic."

_Yesss! I'm classed as a boyfriend! Woohoo!!! Just relax, restrain lower body parts . . . dim the grin . . . and breathe. _"Don't be scared . . . you're not pathetic Nicky." I washed the gel from my fingers, looking up into Nick's eyes. "It's bound to take you a while to get used to touching me. It's like starting the whole dating experience again, except I have the same parts as you." I tried to explain. "Like you said, it's like being a teenager again. Coming out isn't easy Nicky. I'm not going to force you to touch me or be with me if you really don't want to be."

"I want to be . . . I just don't know how."

"You'll know. Hiding in a closet to appear normal like every other kid for years . . . it's gonna take time before you can truly step out and lock it behind you."

"You really are smarter than me, aren't yah G?" He chuckled.

"No, I talked to my therapist about it. He gave me tons of information. He said gay or bisexual people, before they come out are called 'closeted' because they put walls up around their sexuality. Not allowing themselves to access those feelings so they can appear what they think of as normal like everyone else around them. Many identify their sexuality as a disorder, thinking there's something wrong with them . . . but there's nothing wrong with you Nicky. It's not going to be easy . . . but I'll help you as much as I can."

"You offerin' to be my therapist?" He smirked.

"Think I'm up to the task." I smiled at him. "Do you still see your therapist since the coffin?" I asked curiously.

"Yeah . . . but if I talk to him, won't he report back to Ecklie or Grissom."

"The sessions are confidential Nicky. Your PEAP councillor has to report back to Grissom and Ecklie on your mental state. Your therapist however doesn't have to."

"See you're so much smarter than me." He smiled, stepping closer to kiss my lips softly. He looked into my eyes, caressing his thumb across my chin. "I really do want to be with you Greg." He whispered softly. "C'mon, your pancakes are gettin' cold if you're done with your hair?" He smirked.

"Yep, now I just need to pick out my outfit." I teased.

"No wonder you're always late." He chuckled. "Maybe with me as your boyfriend you'll start bein' on time to work."

"You really think so?" I giggled softly. "I think I'll stay in bed longer with you in there." I teased, watching his face flush bright red. "Relax, I'm kidding . . . sorta." I grinned stepping past him to go and get dressed.

* * *

Nick and I leant against the wall of the elevator, watching the numbers counting up to the lab floor. "I don't know if I can do this." Nick suddenly panicked, reaching for the stop button.

I stopped him, pulling his hands back from the buttons. "They're not gonna know Nicky. Just be your usual ladies man self. No one will know anything. Trust me." I tried to assure him. Nick looked into my eyes then nodded giving me a half smile.

"I trust you Greg." He looked back to the doors as they slid open to the lab floor. "I'll see you later."

"Bye." I let him off first, meeting Sara in the hall while he went to sign in. "Hey Sara." As I started talking to her I saw the jealously in Grissom's eyes again. _He's so obvious!_

Grissom handed us our assignments, giving me an evil scowl. He and Catherine head out to the first crime scene with Brass, while I had to stay in the lab and help Wendy with the backlog until they needed my help to process out in the field. _I only just get out of the lab then Grissom stuffs me back in here to keep me away from his woman._ At least I get to watch Nick as he's in Archie's lab across the hall, going through some security footage. _Mmm, he is soooo gorgeous!_

"Greg, you're supposed to be helping me . . . not day dreaming!" Wendy scolded me.

"I was helping. I can't concentrate without music in here. Seriously you should..."

"We're not putting music on!" She said sternly. I rolled my eyes at her, heading for my locker to dig out my I-Pod so I could concentrate. Wendy kept giving me an evil glare as I danced around the lab, getting the DNA evidence processed.

"Grissom!" Wendy shouted as he walked past in the hall. "Please get Greg out of the lab. He's driving me crazy." Grissom looked over at me as I gave him an innocent grin.

"Greg, come with me." Grissom ordered. I threw my lab coat over a chair, following Grissom down the hall. "Greg, I've got a trash run with your name on it." He stopped at his office doorway, handing me the slip in his hands. "Bag everything useful, check for blood and trace in all the skips round the back of the hotel, and if you don't find anything there . . . check the city dump."

I frowned at him looking at the slip. "What are you looking for?"

"Towels . . . they weren't in the laundry, cleaning cart or the room. We suspect they were thrown out. Have fun." He shut his office door in my face, leaving me to look at the slip in my hands. I hadn't been out in the field by myself since I took up the CSI field position. _And why did it have to be a trash run? I wanted it to be something cool like a breaking and entering or a murder. Instead my first times going to be digging through dumpsters!_

* * *

Four long hours later I finally found the towels in the very last trash can. _Next time I'm working __back to front! _I returned to the lab with my evidence, watching smug grin's spread across Grissom and Catherine's faces. "How long until I'm not classed as the rookie anymore?" I asked them curiously.

"You'll be the rookie until someone else joins the team." Catherine smirked.

"I thought I was through with this CSI hazing phase though?"

"Get used to it Greg, what did you find?" Grissom asked, folding his arms across his chest.

"Pizza boxes, Chinese food cartons, condoms, various other food packets, dog food, babies diapers..."

"Related to the case, Greg!" He scowled.

I grinned grabbing the relevant box. "Hotel room towels, covered in blood and..." I lifted the evidence bag with the gun, handing it over. "One Smith and Wesson, no bullets."

"Nice work Greg, now you can help process it . . . after you take a shower." He added, stepping past me. Catherine gave me a wide grin, tapping me on the shoulder as she stepped past.

I sighed heavily then walked off towards the locker room where Nick was sat on the bench tying his shoes. "Hi." He smiled at me then cringed as he caught my scent.

"It's a mixture of dog food and babies diapers." I explained. "You should be used to it anyway."

"I am . . . just not that strong." He teased. "I'll see you later. Make sure you shower." He smirked, pulling his vest on then grabbing his kit. I smiled to him, watching him leave. It was good that he was actually talking to me; I thought for sure once we got back to work he was going to completely ignore me, trying to forget everything that happened over the last two days.

* * *

I stuck my finger into the ice-cream tub, sliding it across my tongue, loudly smacking my lips together watching Nick's eyes widening, his tongue slowly poking out of his mouth and the tight uncomfortableness forming in the front of his jeans as he fidgeted from his position on the couch over the other side of the break room. I tried to hold in a cheeky grin as I tormented him again with another lick, watching his teeth anxiously sink into his lower lip, trying to suppress a moan. _I really shouldn't be torturing him, but no one's ever looked at me with such a lustful look in their eyes before. And my god does he have gorgeous eyes! _The way he looks like you, you feel like the only person in the world, special enough to be looked at with those big brown soulful eyes.

"Nicky, you still here?" Catherine shouted, startling him out of his daydream as she checked her watch, walking into the breakroom. "I told you to get the autopsy results like twenty minutes ago."

"Right, I-I was just . . . on my way." He nervously stammered, climbing to his feet, avoiding eye contact with me and Catherine as he hustled out the room as fast as he could.

"Greg." Catherine smiled, pouring herself a coffee. "You've got blue paint behind your ear." She noticed.

"I have?" I gasped, trying not to blush. I thought I managed to clean all the paint off. "Well we were painting Nick's room yesterday."

"You were painting Nick's room, together?" She asked frowning at me.

"He lives at my apartment since he split with Starla." I rushed to explain, trying not to get too nervous. "So I said he could make the room his own . . . so we painted it."

"Huh." She smiled, looking at the paint behind my ear again, it probably looked like finger marks, _talk about incriminating evidence_. I remembered Nick had blue paint on his fingers when he was kissing me. _I can't wait to taste those sweet lips again! _"There's some more on your neck too." She added with a snicker, heading out the breakroom with her cup of _my coffee _in hand.

I scrambled to my feet, dropping the empty ice-cream tub on the side as I made my way down the hall to the men's room to see this paint on my neck.

I pulled the shirt collar down slightly to see four finger strips of paint across my neck in the mirror. I smiled remembering the kiss Nick gave me with his paint covered fingers then struggled to try and clean it off before anyone else noticed it, making the skin very red and sore as I scrubbed and scratched at the paint. _At least it's not a love bite! _That would be even harder to explain, _but I do recall one of those on my chest. _I raised my t-shirt slightly to reveal the teeth marks around my left nipple. _A perfect love bite from my new boyfriend! I could definitely get used to this._

"Greg!" Warrick shouted from the door, snapping me out of my daze. I quickly dropped my t-shirt back in place to look round at Warrick. He gave me a slight grin then waved around a slip. "Griss wants you to meet him here. Bring your kit."

"Okay." I grabbed the slip from him as I ducked out the door, reading it was the same address he sent me to before. _I didn't miss anything. I was triply carefully and I bagged all the evidence correctly too._

* * *

"Ah, Greg. You're here." Grissom looked at me with that evil smirk. He and Catherine were stood beside the trash shoot, outside the victim's hotel room. _Oh Great! Another CSI hazing technique. _"We need you to climb down here and collect a condom that's stuck about halfway down."

"You called me here to collect a condom out of a shoot that you could have collected in the time it took me to get here?" Grissom and Catherine both nodded, holding up the harness to lower me down. "Did I mention I'm claustrophobic?"

"Since when?" Catherine laughed.

"I'm scared of heights too." I added, trying to get them to change their minds.

"You'll be fine." Grissom smiled, instructing me to come closer so they could strap me in.

"Why me? Catherine's smaller than me." I pointed out.

"You never send a lady down a trash shoot Greg." Grissom scolded me. "You'll be perfectly fine. We used a mini cam, it's half way down, stuck in one of the joins of the tube." I raised my arms as they strapped the harness around my waist. "It could be a vital piece of evidence Greg. All the condoms you collected didn't have our vic's DNA on them. This one might well be our smoking gun."

"Just remember to bag it with the semen still inside." Catherine chuckled, handing me a flashlight, tweezers and an evidence bag. I shoved the tweezers and bag into my pockets, clicking on the flashlight. Grissom held open the trash shoot door, while I climbed inside, being carefully lowered down the vial smelling trash shoot, _and I just had another shower as well! _I tried to breathe through my mouth from the god awful smells down there then spotted a condom, wedged in one of the gaps just past my feet.

"Little more!" I shouted up. They lowered me a little more until I was eye level with it. _Sometimes I really hate this job! _"Okay, Stop!" I shouted back, pulling the tweezers from my pocket to bag the evidence. _I don't see why Catherine couldn't have done this! _They pulled me back up with smug grins on their faces. "You need me to dig around in anymore dirt?" I asked sarcastically, un-strapping my waist from the harness.

"Nope, that'll be all Greg. Can you get this back to the lab and tell Wendy to process it A S A P!" Grissom instructed. "Oh and take a shower." They both turned up their noses at me, walking off with a shit eating grins plastered across their faces. _God they think they're a real riot! It's like being back in the schoolyard again with bullies; they always pick on the little one._

* * *

When I finally got home at the end of the never ending shift, _(where I had to shower three times too!)_ I crashed back on the sofa, immediately closing my eyes. I prayed for someone new to join the team so they'd stop picking on me to do all their dirty work. That's what I love about Nick. He's never treated me differently. To the others in the lab I was the goofy, weird lab tech, now that I'm in the field I'm their little slave that gets the bullshit assignments and the tasks that they really don't want do and none of them respect me as a CSI. I'm just a big joke to them, but Nick... he always treats me with respect, he even inspired me to go into the field. Even though he's been through some serious shit himself, like being held at gun point, not once but twice, stalked, accused of murder, buried alive and thrown from a second story window. He's still so strong, _he's my hero!_

I woke up feeling warm lips being pressed against mine. I fluttered my eyes open to see Nick knelt down beside me. "I've been waitin' to do that all day." He whispered softly, brushing his fingertips through my hair.

"Really, all day?" I grinned widely at him as I stretched out.

"Yes . . . ever since you tormented me with that ice-cream stunt." He smirked, poking me in the ribs. "I couldn't concentrate after that."

"I don't know what you're talking about." I grinned innocently.

"I'll bet." He closed the distance between us, softly kissing my lips again. "You're a tease Sanders." He gave me a second sweet tender kiss, gently caressing my tongue with his own.

"I'm only a tease if you don't follow through." I locked my hands around his neck, pulling him closer as he initiated a third kiss, sending tingles of bliss through my body.

"I can't stay Greg." He whispered pulling back slightly.

"Where are you going?"

"Starlas doctor's appointment is in half an hour. I wanted to grab somethin' to eat before I go."

"Did you want me to make you anything?"

"No, I can get somethin', besides you're tired." He kissed me on the forehead then climbed to his feet, heading off towards the kitchen to grab the left over burritos from the fridge. He poured himself a glass of water then sat down at the dining table with his food. He took a bite then looked over at me. "Hey, have we got any hot sauce?"

"There's some Cholula in the fridge." Nick nodded going to grab it. "Hey Nick?" Nick looked up at me from his burrito. "What are you doing for Valentine's day?"

"Nothin' really. Why did you have somethin' planned?" I shook my head, walking over to the table to sit on the empty chair opposite him.

"It's my parents wedding. They want me to bring a date."

"You want to bring me?" He asked surprised.

"No . . . you don't have to. I was merely suggesting it."

"Greg, don't get me wrong . . . I'd love to go with you . . . but it's, kinda a little soon." He nervously stammered as though he was trying his best not to hurt my feelings.

"I know, just forget it. I just wanted to ask." I went to climb to my feet but Nick grabbed for my wrist across the table, pulling me back towards him.

"Look Greg . . . I want to, I really want to . . . but I just can't."

"Don't worry about it." I smiled at him. "Not like I'm not used to being alone on Valentine's Day."

"Hey, you're not alone anymore." Nick pulled me onto his lap, joining our lips as he slid his hands slowly up my back.

"Mmm . . . you taste like hot sauce." I grinned, licking my lips.

"Promise me you won't hook up with anyone at this weddin' though."

"Like I could!" I laughed at the statement.

"I don't know, I think you're gorgeous." He rasped, trailing his fingers down the side of my face. "The ladies better keep their hands off you, coz your mine."

"I love how possessive you are."

"Good." He smiled. "Now you need to get yourself off to bed, you barely got any sleep yesterday and you look as though you're gonna drop. I'll see you later." He finished off his burrito, kissing my cheek then lifted me from his lap.

"You sleeping in my room again or do you think the paint fumes have cleared from yours?" I asked, shoving my hands into my pockets. Nick bit his lip a moment trying to think.

"Well if you want . . . I'd like to sleep in yours." He smiled slightly as his cheeks flushed red. "But if you don't want me to..."

"I do." I cut him off.

"Okay then." Nick nervously cleared his throat, heading for the kitchen. "I'll see you later." He pulled his jacket back on, heading out the front door. I spun on my heels, heading for my bedroom when the front door opened again. Nick walked back towards me, cupping my face in his hands as he kissed me softly. "Sorry," He panted across my lips. "Forgot the kiss goodbye."

"I'll let it slid this time, since you came back." I smiled back.

"Bye." He pressed another kiss to my lips then walked off heading for the front door again. I waved him goodbye then crashed back on my bed with a wide grin on my face.

* * *

**Please Review, this one took a little longer to write. But I think I got it just the way I want it to go now. Thanks so much for all your lovely reviews. I'm glad your enjoying this story. I've done a lot of research on 'closeted men' from pysch reports and things on how Nick might react to coming out. So I hope you like the slow pace of his coming out :D**

**Thanks to Tish for beta-ing**


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen:**

I drowsily blinked my eyes open a few times, feeling a warm body pressed against mine. I tried to stretch out but my arms and legs were pinned down. I looked down slightly to see Nick's head resting on my chest; _I love his gorgeous head of hair, the way it smells and the way it feels when we kiss_. His strong legs were pinning mine to the bed, while his gorgeous muscular body was over mine. I could feel his heartbeat against my stomach and his soft snoring against my chest. _I could wake up like this forever . . . except for the dead arm! Ouch, I gotta move, can't feel it, ow, ow, ow..._

_Ouch. _I struggled to move from under him, carefully trying to lift him without disturbing him. I managed to move my left arm slightly to rub my eyes then continued to try and squirm free from the slumbering body on top of me, _without waking him up._

_Too late! _Nick began to shift his weight slightly, moaning softly as he began to stir awake. _Please don't freak! _I panicked as the slumbering body came to life. He rubbed his eyes then ran a hand through his hair as he looked up at me.

"Sorry." He yawned widely. "I roll sometimes." He explained, rolling off me to the empty space beside me. "Are you okay?"

"Uh huh," I felt my arm coming back to life as the blood began to pump through it once again. "Don't worry about it." Nick sat up straight, running his fingers through his hair as he avoided eye contact with me. "Are you okay Nicky, your shaking."

"No . . . I'm fine." He lay back down on the bed beside me, breathing heavily.

"Is it me? Waking up next to me? Or on top of me?" I corrected insecurely.

"No." He shook his head as he turned to look at me. "No it's not you G. I had another bad dream is all."

"Are you okay?" He nodded reaching for my hand to hold. He laced his fingers tightly with mine, staring up at the ceiling. "Do you wonna talk about it?" Nick shook his head, remaining silent. _Something I wasn't very good at! _"Do you want me to get you a coffee or anything? Glass of water . . . or your pills?"

"No." He smiled round at me. "I'm fine . . . I am startin' to like wakin' up next to you though."

"Because of my overtalking?" I grinned at him.

"No, I've never had someone _happy_ to wake up to before." He turned completely on his side to look at me. "You don't freak out if I've had a nightmare, or yell at me for layin' on you." He chuckled slightly.

"I probably couldn't yell with you crushing me." I teased.

"You need to put some more meat on you boy." He teased back, tickling my tummy. I giggled and squirmed under his touch as he looked into my eyes with deep lust. "Maybe next time you should lay on top so I don't crush you." I smiled widely, looking at the sparkle in his eyes. He rolled slightly closer to me, so his body was pressed up again mine, looking at my lips as he slowly advanced closer.

I felt tingles rush through my body, a warm swirly feeling in my stomach and my toes beginning to curl already as he approached me with baited breath, pressing his sweet soft lips to mine then gliding his moist tongue delicately into my mouth. With each gentle lick, suck and caress of his skilful tongue, I was one step closer to heaven. I closed my eyes as he put a little more muscle behind the kiss, something I had never experienced before from a single kiss. Pure bliss surged through my body, actually causing my eyes to water. He broke a moment for a gasp of air, before he started again, bravely sliding one of his hands beneath my pyjama top to caress my flat chest.

"Mmm." He moaned softly, slowly pulling back, panting him warm musky breath across my lips as he kept his hand beneath my top. "Good Mornin' G."

"Good morning." I smiled back, licking my lips so I could taste him. "What did I do to deserve a kiss like that?"

"Like I need a reason to kiss you?" He grinned, gently locking our lips together again. I involuntary shivered as his warm hand slid across my chest. He pulled back again to look into my eyes. "I could kiss you forever G." He rasped, sliding his hand down to grip my hip.

"What happened to my uptight Texan?" I asked, not that I minded his sudden change in attitude.

"Well comin' home to you after spendin' an hour with Starla was like heaven. Starla drives me crazy, but you... I'm crazy about."

"Really? I thought I'd drive you crazy too."

"I love your craziness." _That's almost an 'I love you', Relax Greg, don't over think it! _He softly kissed my lips again, moving his body closer to mine so our legs were tangle together. He slid his hands down to my waist. "No." He suddenly grunted, pulling back.

"What? What's wrong?" I asked completely confused.

"I'm sorry. I can't go that far." He rolled off me onto the bed beside me. "It's not you." He covered his hands over his eyes as he breathed heavily.

"I wouldn't want you to go that far anyway Nicky." I rolled to my side to look at him. "You can touch me without going that far."

"It's just me . . . I don't trust myself." He turned his head to look into my eyes. "That didn't last long did it?" He chuckled.

"I know, ever considered a career in acting?" I teased. "I don't want to be with you for sex anyway, not that it's not equally important. My previous relationships they only ever wanted me around for sex then kicked me out. I want a real relationship with you."

"I want that too." He agreed. "I want you around for more than just sex." He suddenly flushed bright red. "Can we please talk about somethin' else now?" He practically whimpered.

"How'd it go with the doctor yesterday?" I asked trying to change the subject for him.

"Okay . . . you weren't kiddin' about the waitin' room." He chuckled. "Starlas gettin' really big now and I heard the baby's heartbeat."

"Yeah, how'd you feel?"

"Not how I expected." He rolled onto his side to look into my eyes again. "You know I've always dreamt of bein' a father. I used to imagine havin' kids of my own. I never imagined it like this though..."

"Separated you mean?" He sheepishly nodded. "Nicky, maybe now isn't the best time for us to be together. I don't want you to take on too much at once."

"But I want to be with you Greg." Nick laced his hand with mine, looking deep into my eyes. "You're the only thing I'm sure of right now."

"I just worry that when the baby comes . . . you won't want to be with me anymore."

"I'm not gonna break your heart Greg, I kissed you remember." He smiled softly. "It's not gonna be easy . . . I'm gonna be a part time father, accordin' to my sister the divorce papers say I can still be a part of the child's life, only on weekends though and their challenging my mental state from all the crap I've been through. If I don't pass, it'll be one weekend a month . . . tops."

"Ouch."

"I know . . . but you and me." He smiled, softly smoothing his hand up my chest. "You and me, I'm hopin' will be constant. Thank you for bein' patient with me."

"You're welcome." I smiled, loving the new confidence he'd found today as he crawled closer to kiss me passionately, moving his hands down to grip my hips again. "One hour with Starla yesterday must have really done the trick." I giggled.

"Well with her I was miserable . . . you make me happy. I want to feel more comfortable to be with you. That and I talked to my therapist like you said." I opened my eyes slightly wider, watching him talking excitedly about his session. "He gave me a bunch of information too, just like you did. My therapist was completely clueless about me too. He told me you can't choose to be gay, but you can choose to come out of the closet. Hour long emotional drainin' session really did the trick. I'm not sayin' I'll be comfortable enough to have sex with you just yet, not that I would because we've only been dating 3 days now..."

"I thought over talking was my nervous trait?" I teased.

Nick laughed shaking his head. "All I'm sayin' is... I really want to be with you Greg. I'll do whatever it takes to prove it to you."

"You don't have to prove anything to me Nicky. You have to be comfortable in your own skin too yah know."

"I know . . . I'll get there." Nick looked up at the time. "Oh, I gotta get up."

"Where are you going?" I asked curiously, seeing the time was almost 4pm, we still had four hours until we had to go to work, so he couldn't be heading in early.

"I'm meetin' my sister in town." He scrambled off the bed, heading straight out the door to the bathroom.

"When did you get in?" I shouted after him.

"About eleven." He called back then appeared in the doorway with his t-shirt off and a toothbrush in his mouth. "What are you gonna do till you have to go to work?"

"What day is it?" I asked leaning up on my elbows.

"Thursday." He reminded me.

I bit my lip as I looked round at the time. "Shit!" I kicked myself inwardly, quickly scrambling off the bed.

"What?"

"I was supposed to meet my mom at half three." I scrambled over to the closet, fetching some clothes.

"You wonna shower first?" He asked me. I shook my head pulling of my pyjama top and bottoms, pulling a sweatshirt down over my head. "You're not gonna shower to see you mother?"

"I showered four times yesterday Nicky." I chuckled, flattening my hair as I pushed back the hood of my sweatshirt. "I'm sure my mother won't care." I grinned at him, dropping onto the edge of the bed as I pulled some sweatpants and socks on. He watched me the whole time with a lustful look in his eye. I jumped to my feet, tightening a watch around my wrist. "See yah later." I went to step past him when he stepped in front of me frowning. "What?"

"I don't get a kiss goodbye?" He pouted. I smiled stepping closer to kiss his minty fresh lips.

"Bye." I smiled breaking apart.

"Bye G, have fun with yah mom." I nodded pulling on some sneakers then making my out the front door with him watching me the whole time. _I can't believe I have a boyfriend!_

* * *

I casually walked towards my mother leant against the back of a park bench, giving her a wide grin. "Finally pried yourself out of bed sweetheart?" She asked in a sarcastic tone.

"I'm right on time," I lied looking at my watch. "You said 4:30 right?"

"I said 3:30 and you know it." She laughed, trying to slap me round the head, but I ducked out the way just in time. "You could have at least combed your hair honey."

"It's my style." I covered. "So what did you wonna see me about anyway?"

"Suit fitting." She linked arms with me, heading off towards the shops.

"What do you mean by suit fitting?"

"I know for a fact you don't own any suits Gregory, my wedding's coming up and I'm not having you show up in rainbow hippie colours..."

"I do not dress like a hippie." I snipped at her feeling offended.

"Course not honey." She said sarcastically, leading me into a smart suit store. As we entered I noticed a very posh black suit with a blue and gold stripped tie. _Mmm, wouldn't Nick look good in that one? _"Here go honey." I looked over to see her holding up a slightly less elegant suit with a red bow tie. "C'mon, go try it on."

"I don't see why I have to; you clearly know my sizes off by heart now." I remarked, taking the suit from her to check. _Yep! That's creepy. She hasn't bought me clothes since college and she still knows my exact sizes!_

I reluctantly walked off to a changing room, changing into the perfect fit suit. I fiddled with the shirt buttons, tucking it into the trousers, feeling very awkward. _I don't do smart!_ I wrapped the bow tie under my shirt collar, struggling to tie it. I had never tied a bow tie in my life, _how do people do these things? Cross, over, under... No! That's all wrong?!_

"Damn it!" I draped the two ends down again, looking in the mirror in front of me. _Okay cross the longer over the shorter end. Tie a knot, over, under... Grhhh! How do you do these things? C'mon Greg! You're supposed to be a genius! A genius that can't tie a simple bow tie!_

"Everything okay in there honey?"

"Perfect." I mumbled, starting again. _Cross the loops, over, under, tie a knot... Oh great, that looks worse! _I looked up to see my mother had swept the curtain aside, giving me a smug grin.

"Having some trouble there Einstein?" She teased then pulled me closer by the bowtie ends, skilfully knotting it together in five seconds flat. _How does she do that? She's a girl, not like she ever wears them. _"There we go . . . Oh honey." She gasped. "Don't you look handsome?" _Here __it comes. _She stepped forwards checking the length of the shirt and jacket sleeves then the trouser leg length then the sticking her thumbs down my belt to check how loose or tight it was.

"Mom stop!" I pushed her hands away, making sure no one was looking. "I'm not a kid anymore."

"I'm checking it fits baby."

"Couldn't you just ask me? It fits fine." I told her, pushing her hands away.

"Fine." She huffed. "So... did you come out to Nick?"

"Yes." I mumbled as she continued checking the clothes.

"And, how'd he take it?" She asked curiously.

"Are you prying mother?"

"I just wonna know." She said defensively. "You never tell me anything anymore."

"Actually . . . he kissed me." She looked at me wide eyed.

"He kissed you? You said he was straight. Was he drunk?"

"A little . . . but he classes me as a boyfriend." I grinned at her.

"Oh sweetie, don't get your hopes up..."

"Why do you think it's gonna fail so soon? Am I really that annoying?" She shook her head taking a step back to looking at the suit.

"No . . . I just know how quickly you fall for people baby. I can't bare to see you broken hearted again."

"Like you?" I retorted.

"I know you think this is a little soon sweetheart. But I've been so lonely lately, what with you gone and your grandparents dying . . . your father and I still love each other honey. I wouldn't marry him again if I didn't."

"You've only been separated for eight years and fighting for fifteen . . . how long have you been seeing each other this time around?" I asked curiously.

"About a year." She dropped onto one of the chairs, sighing heavily.

"Why didn't you tell me? You tell me everything mom. More then I'd like you to most of the time. My best friend Nick has been in a loveless marriage for three years and he's finally escaping. You held it together for 21 years before you finally divorced him. But you were both so miserable."

"I don't expect you to understand honey. But we do love each other."

"You did before, but you still tore each other apart." I countered.

"It's going to be different this time."

"Why? Because I'm not there?" I asked the question that had been pressing on my mind for years. "Do you think your marriage will work better without me there?"

"No honey, you were never the reason."

"So how's it different?" I asked, desperately waiting for an answer.

"Just trust me sweetheart . . . you were never the reason." She climbed to her feet, drying her eyes with a tissue. "I have to go. You should really wear briefs with that suit honey." _Oh God! _I whimpered, she's done it again. She has a record of embarrassing me no matter what we're doing and her record still stands. "I love you sweetheart." She pressed a kiss to my cheek then stepped out of the changing stall. "I'll see you later honey."

"Bye." I watched her hustle off out the store then dropped onto the chair she was sat on, looking up at myself in the mirror. She still didn't technically answer my question. _Was I the reason for their divorce? Is that why they're so sure it will work this time?_

* * *

I walked back through the apartment, seeing bags of Nick's stuff stacked in the hall. _Oh No! _I clutched my head as I stepped over a box towards his bedroom door. I looked around Nick's room seeing him sat on the floor with his head in his hands. "Nicky, what's wrong?" I stumbled over a pair of his discarded jeans on the floor, dropping to the floor in front of him. "Nicky, what's going on?"

"I can't stay here." He muttered, covering his face with his hands. As he spoke it was obvious that he was crying.

"Why not? What's happened?"

"I just can't be here Greg!" He snapped at me.

"Did something happen with your sister?" I looked at Nick concerned as I saw his hands trembling. "Nicky, talk to me please."

"She kept askin' about Starla, sayin' how disappointed everyone back home would be when they found out. What if they find out that I'm..." He glanced up at me. "I can't be here with you Greg."

"Fine." I huffed.

"What?" He asked shocked.

"I said I wouldn't push you and I won't. You can't be with me because you're too afraid to disappoint your family . . . then go ahead."

"Just like that?" He asked looking up into my eyes.

"It's what you wonna hear isn't it? I give up trying to get people to love me. You either do or you don't."

"I do . . . but I just can't be with you."

"Don't then." I muttered, trying to hold back my tears. "I'll just forget everything that happened between us . . . even your promise not to break my heart, just remember you kissed me." I climbed to my feet. "The choice is completely up to you." I sniffed back my tears, looking into his eyes. "Who are you more concerned with? Me, after you promised you wouldn't break my heart? Or disappointing your family, who you barely talk to outside of holidays?" I walked towards the door, looking over my shoulder at him. I hoped he would change his mind as I walked across the hall to my room. As soon as I hit the bed, my tears started flowing. I clutched a pillow close to my chest to muffle the sounds of me crying. I just couldn't hold it in any longer. _My parents are getting married again and I'm losing my boyfriend of 3 days!!!_

I clutched the pillow tighter as my tears pooled down my face. Suddenly I felt an arm wrap round my waist from behind me, spooning me tightly. I rolled over to see Nick laying beside me. He wrapped his arms around me tightly, pulling me against his tight embrace. "I'm sorry." He whispered, holding me tight. "Of course I choose you." He reassured me.

"You do?"

"I do." He cupped my face in my hands, kissing me with a hungry fire. "I love you Greg."

* * *

**Please Review, I had tears in my eyes writing this last part. I hope you like it :D**


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen:**

I opened my eyes slowly, greeted by Nick's smiling face looking down at me. He was laying right beside me, with his body pressed right up against mine, leaning on his elbow beside my head to look down into my eyes. "Hi." He softly whispered.

"Hi." I stretched out, glancing at the clock beside the bed. "Shouldn't we be going to work?" I asked, yawning widely as I rubbed my eyes that were still sore from my tears.

"I called in sick, told Griss we both caught the same cold." Nick rolled onto his back, wrapping his arms around me tighter, pulling me right against his chest. "I'm sorry . . . I know I've said it dozens of times . . . I never wonna be the cause of your tears again." He kissed my eyelids softly, burying his face against mine. "I'm so sorry Greg."

"I forgive you." I repositioned myself against his chest to listen to his soothing heartbeat. "If it helps any, I was already upset _before_ I walked through the front door."

"Why?" He asked, his voice swamped with concern. "Tell me G." He whispered softly, circling his fingertips softly across my forearm.

"My mom thinks her marriage is going to work better this time around because I'm not there."

"Did she actually say that?"

"No, but they were miserable together my whole childhood . . . now they suddenly think it's going to work . . . because I'm out of the picture." I snuggled closer to him, burying my face in his neck, smelling his deep musky scents. "I don't remember them ever really being happy together. My dad didn't leave until I was 14, but he was always away on business trips before then."

"I'm sure you're not the reason G." He clutched me tightly, pressing a warm kiss to my forehead. "Sometimes people enter marriages for the wrong reasons . . . havin' kids together can increase the stress between them . . . but it wasn't because of you."

"You've never even met them Nicky." I smiled slightly, looking up into his eyes.

"No, but I talk to your mom a lot . . . she loves you so much Greg, there's no way you were the reason." He cuddled me tightly, smoothing his hands softly up and down my back. "When did your parents marry the first time around?"

"Twenty nine years ago." Nick looked down at me surprised. "Yep, they married when my mom found out she was pregnant."

"That's another set up to a bad marriage. Not everyone can make it work if they get married because they got pregnant. It brings too much stress to the relationship with a newborn baby."

After a moments silence I asked the question that had been on my mind for years. "Why did you marry Starla then?"

"Coz she asked me to . . . and my parents were pressurin' me to get married." He explained, looking into my eyes. "I thought I could learn to love her too. I kinda liked her as a friend when we first started goin' out . . . I guess coz she reminded me of my sister Kayla and I missed home . . . but she turned out to be _really_ annoyin'." He chuckled.

"So why are you with me?" I asked inquisitively wanting to find out if I was another one of Nick Stoke's settles.

"I'm with you because I want to be." He smiled, hugging me closer. "Starla made the first moves on me . . . but you . . . I want to be with you . . . I kissed you, remember? I never make the first moves on anyone." He admitted. "I kissed you because I really wanted to be with you."

"Here I thought you just wanted to know if my lips really did make you see stars?" I teased.

"Well they did." He grinned back. "I loved that kiss . . . it's been runnin' through my mind since."

"Did you really mean what you said earlier?" I asked, leaning up on my elbow to look deep into his gorgeous dark brown eyes.

"What did I say?"

"You know . . . the L word?"

"That _love_ word?" He grinned at me raising his eyebrows. "You mean when I said that I love you?" I nodded watching a sparkle in his gorgeous brown eyes as he kissed me passionately. "I meant it. I love you Greg." He whispered, caressing his thumb across my chin. "I've never said that and meant it to anyone before."

_Oh My God! He loves me and he means it. Contain your excitement Greg, slow deep breaths, don't cry or squeal with exhilaration, steady the heartbeat. _I took a deep breath, smiling widely as I looked into his eyes. "You know technically . . . we haven't had a first date yet." I stated, swirling my fingertip across the exposed skin on his chest.

"I thought our first date was playin' computer games together?" He rasped, licking his lips. "What were you plannin' for our second date, G?" He asked curiously.

"Well we've got the rest of the day off, huh?"

"Yep . . . why, what did you wonna do?"

"Well . . . I wanted to take a shower first; I got tagged as I walked out the suit store."

"I thought you smelled different." He chuckled, smelling my again.

"Do you like it?" The fragrance I got tagged with smelled like wild fruit or something. _I certainly didn't like it._

"Not really." Nick shook his head. "It doesn't smell like you."

"Shower it is then." I winked, kissing his lips softly as I rolled off the bed. "Maybe we could watch a movie together later, snuggling on the couch?" I suggested, walking to the foot of the bed.

"Sounds good to me G."

"Cool, I can make us some burritos too." I added, heading for the door.

"Hey Greg... do you er... do you mind if I... if I..." He nervously stammered. "Do you mind if I..." He stopped talking again as he looked up into my eyes. "Doesn't matter." He mumbled softly.

"What were you gonna ask me?" I walked round to the side of the bed where he was laying, dropping to the edge.

"Doesn't matter." He repeated, retreating into his embarrassment again.

I took hold of his hand, lacing my fingers with his as I looked into his eyes. "Ask me, Nicky."

"Don't worry about it." He shook his head, looking down at our laced hands a moment. "It doesn't matter." He sat up, pressing a tender kiss to my lips then climbed off the bed over me. "I'll go unpack my stuff."

"You can leave some of your things in here . . . if you want. I can make some room in my closet or some of the draws?" I suggested. Nick thought about it a moment then nodded, giving me a wide smile. "Cool, I'm gonna go take a shower." I smiled to him then climbed off the bed, heading down the hall to the bathroom. I left the door slightly open, pulling my sweatshirt off as I stood in front of the mirror to shave and brush my teeth as I didn't have time to earlier.

_Ow! _I winced as I cut myself shaving _again!!!_ I looked up to see Nick laughing at me from the open doorway. "What?" I asked turning to face him.

"Who taught you how to shave?" He chuckled walking in, looking at the little pieces of toilet paper stuck to my chin.

"My mother." I muttered embarrassed. "She made me practice with a balloon covered in shaving cream. If I popped the balloon I wasn't allowed to do it myself."

"And did you?" He asked a wide grin on his face as he stepped closer.

"That's information I will not disclose." I smiled awkwardly at him, returning to trying to shave.

"C'mere." He took the razor from my hands, turning me in his arms. "Don't want you shreddin' your gorgeous face anymore." He snickered. "Didn't you ever ask your dad?" He asked, delicately shaving my jaw line for me.

"No . . . did you?"

"My brother taught me how to shave. My dad didn't talk to us much about the whole puberty stages."

"What about your mom?" Nick shook his head. "Lucky you!" I smirked. "I woulda preferred my dad to talk to me about it. But he never really wanted a relationship with me."

Nick looked into my eyes a moment, softly gliding the razor across my jaw line. "Just shave with the grain G, don't force it though . . . I don't want you bleedin' to death." He smiled softly as he rinsed the razor in the warm water left in the sink.

"Do you know how to tie a bow tie too?" Nick nodded giving me a confused look. "You can teach me that too then. I have to learn in less than a week, I don't wonna have to ask my mom for that too." I chuckled.

"You've never tied a bow tie?" I shook my head. "Lucky you, we had to wear them for special occasions, family gatherin's, thanksgivin', Christmas even birthdays. We had to wear ties every Sunday for church too."

"See I never had to wear posh clothes to any of that stuff. If I ever wore a tie I had to wear a clip on, not the elastic ones. My mom worried I'd strangle myself."

He smiled shaking his head at me. "There go . . . all done." He smiled at me, admiring his handy work. I washed the rest of the foam from my face with cold water, grabbing a towel to dry my face then turned back to Nick.

He leant forwards, softly kissing my freshly shaven jaw line. "Perfect." He rasped. I leant back against the sink as he pressed our lips together, giving me a series of sweet tender kisses, slowly moving across my jaw again towards my neck and chest. I gripped the sink behind me, trying to keep my hands from exploring his body as he was still very nervy about physical contact with me. "Greg..." He whispered softly, looking into my eyes with his parted lips.

"Yeah?"

"What I was gonna ask you before . . . but I wussed out." He nervously cleared his throat, sliding his hands down my arms to lace his fingers with mine. "Would you mind if I..." He stopped again, turning to look at the shower. "If I er... joined you?"

My heart soared through the roof. I bit my lip to keep it from trembling, tightening my grip around his hands. "Course you can." I managed to reply in a barely audible whisper. Nick slipped his hands around my waist, pulling me closer as he slid his tongue into my mouth again.

I slid my hands down his back, un-tucking the shirt from his jeans with one swift tug. Nick didn't flinch or stop me so I started with the buttons down the front, sweeping the shirt off his broad shoulders, dropping it to the floor behind him. My fingers found their way to his belt, fiddling with the clasp as he smoothed his hands down my body. I carefully slid the zipper down of his jeans, looking into his eyes as he allowed me to open them completely, sliding his jeans down to the floor.

Nick sucked in a breath, stepping out of his jeans, sliding them back across the floor with his foot. He slid my sweatpants down my legs then walked us towards the open shower curtain. I tugged down my boxers first, pulling off my socks then stepped into the shower, watching Nick going through things in his mind. He stared into my eyes a moment, trying to gain some self confidence before he tugged off his own boxers, hesitantly taking a step into the shower in front of me, pulling the shower curtain across as I fiddled with the knobs, setting the temperature.

We both stood completely still as the water poured down around us, coating our bodies in steadily warming drips of water. I reached for his hands with mine, lacing our fingers togethers. Feeling he needed a little more encouragement, I raised his hands to my chest, placing his fingers against the smooth surface of my skin. Nick gasped for a breath as I slid his hand across my chest to feel my heart pounding against the surface. The touch felt incredibly innocent, but made my whole body hum with excitement, sending the blood rushing to my lower extremities.

It took a few more moments for Nick to settle from his shakiness and nervousness. He took a tiny step closer to me, sliding his hands down my sides, being cautious not to go past my hips. Nick slowly brought our mouths together, starting with a slow tender kiss as he looked into my eyes. He gasped as our bodies slightly touched, _but he didn't freak out._ He stepped slightly closer again as he upped the intense affectionate sloppy kisses, under the warm spray of the shower water. He moaned against my lips as I stepped closer, pressing our equally aroused bodies together for the first time.

Nick closed his eyes, panting heavily as he started to lose control of his body. I pawed my fingers through his silky dripping wet hair, breathing across his parted lips as his body started to quake, with our hips gently brushing. He whimpered softly, clutching me closer.

"Just let go Nicky." I whispered softly against his ear. Nick did just that, moaning as the intense ecstasy feeling surged through his body. _A feeling I remembered well from my first time with a guy. _I couldn't hold on any longer either. Nick slid his hands around my back to hold me tighter just as my orgasm was on the verge of escaping. I shuddered against his body as I began to see stars, biting my lip to keep from moaning too loudly. _I didn't want to scare him away, right when we were getting to the good stuff._

We stayed pressed together for what seemed like an eternity as the water poured down around us. I wanted to stay right there with Nick against me for the rest of my life. I was completely at peace, feeling as though I was in heaven, feeling his heartbeat and gentle breathing against me was just _too perfect!_

Nick climbed out the shower shortly after, he kissed me as he stepped out, pulling a towel around his waist then walked off down the hall, so I figured he must have been okay. _I hope he's __okay!_

I sighed heavily, leaning back against the shower wall. My knees were beginning to feel weak; I gripped the shower rail behind me, closing my eyes as the warm water poured down around me. _I think I just fell a little bit more in love with Nick!_

* * *

Once I got out the shower, I lay down on the bed on my side, watching Nick in the walk in closet, carefully hanging all his shirts so they wouldn't crease. I couldn't help but smile as my closeted boyfriend was stood in a closet while I was laying on the bed in my boxer shorts. "What are you smilin' at?" Nick asked, grinning as he looked round at me.

"Nothing." I rolled onto my back, trying to stop my grin, but it was almost impossible. Nick climbed onto the bed beside me, leaning over me, smiling as he looked down into my eyes.

"What are you smilin' at G?"

"You." He cupped my face in his hands, kissing me passionately. An ear to ear grin spread across his face as we pulled apart. "So everything's okay?" I asked as he was a little quiet after our shower together earlier.

"Perfect." He rasped. "If life with you is even half as hot as that shower . . . I definitely wonna stick around for it." My heart soared through the roof for the thousandth time. _Nick Stokes was definitely a keeper!_ "That is, if you'll have me?" He asked.

"I might just have to keep you around to keep me from shredding my face." I teased. He smiled again, admiring his handiwork as he softly kissed my jaw line again.

"Oh, as for bow tie." Nick climbed off the bed, heading back into the closet, digging out a bow tie. "You gotta get practisin', G." He pulled me to my feet, whirling me round so I was in front of the mirror, draping the bow tie around my neck. He stood behind me with his hands around my chest as he skilfully tied the bow tie. "See that?" He smiled at his handiwork then undid it so he could instruct me. "See this ends slightly longer?" I nodded. "You cross the longer end over the shorter end, like so." He demonstrated. "Then tie a knot with the longer end leadin' . . . hold the longer end with your thumb and forefinger, holdin' it up . . . point your middle finger down towards the bow then with your other hand..." He demonstrated it to me with his, knotting the tie into a perfect bow then gently tightened it. "See . . . think you can do it?" He undid the bow again then moved his hands down to my waist, watching me in the mirror.

I struggled at first, _having the hot Texan's breath against my bare shoulder really wasn't helping me concentrate either. _I managed to tie something that looked _nothing like what he tied_, erupting a slight snicker from Nick. "Not bad for a first try." He smiled, pulling it apart again. "Here, try it again." He took my hands in his, directing my hands in tying the bow tie knot.

"You make it look so easy." I giggled.

"Well I have been tyin' them longer then you G." He chuckled. "You just need some more practice." He slid the bow tie undone again, watching me in the mirror as I struggled to tie it again. "I'm gonna miss you G." He whispered softly, his lips against my ear.

"You can't last without me for four days?" I asked, feeling my heart pounding as I pulled the bow together, _terribly!_

"Well I've gotten really attached to you the past few days. We've gone from close friends, roommates, best friends then to almost lovers in a matter of weeks. Who'd have thought Starla throwin' me out the house turned out to be a blessin'." He smiled widely at me, circling his arms tighter around my waist. "I never thought I'd end up this close to you." He whispered, resting his chin on my shoulder.

"Me either . . . and I cannot tie this freakin' thing!" I laughed, pulling the bow tie apart.

"You just need more practice." He laughed. "You can call me anytime if you need help . . . or just wonna talk to me."

"Don't worry Nicky, I'll miss you too." I turned in his arms to face him. "I'll call you lots; you'll probably get sick of me."

"I doubt it." He smiled against my lips. "It'll be so quiet around here without cha."

"I'm not going off to war, Nicky." I chuckled slightly. "It's four days; I'll be back before yah know it. You're not gonna go back to girls once I'm gone though are you?" I insecurely asked.

"No way . . . what about you? You're not gonna meet up with anyone?"

I shook my head, giving him a smile. "Nope . . . I'm all yours." I rasped, looking at the sparkle in his eyes. "Finally committing to a relationship, are yah scared Mr Stokes?" I teased.

"I _can_ commit to a relationship Greg," He chuckled. "I just never wanted to before you."

"I'll take that as a compliment."

"You should." He softly kissed me, caressing my chin with his thumb. "I'm gonna finish un-packin', you keep practisin'."

I nodded then sat on the edge of the bed, fiddling with the bow tie again as Nick returned to the closet. "You know if you change your mind . . . coming with me I mean . . . you don't have to come as my date necessarily . . . and my parents will be gone off to Maui for their honeymoon, so I'll be home alone for one day, if you wanted to..." I rambled, looking up at him.

"Sure . . . I'll think about it." He nodded. _That's an almost yes!!!_

"So did you still want those burritos?"

"Definitely." I smiled climbing to my feet, grabbing some jeans and a t-shirt off the end of my bed, pulling them on as I made my way down the hall to the kitchen. I felt closer to Nick than ever before. This is what I always dreamed relationships were like, now I finally got to experience it _and I'm loving every second! I wouldn't want to rush this feeling for the world!_

Nick finished unpacking his stuff again, circling his arms around my waist from behind me as I was cooking. "Mmm, that smells good." He rasped against my ear. "I squared away all my stuff, kept some things in my bedroom, just in case. You sure you don't mind my stuff in your wardrobe?"

"Nope . . . that's _our_ wardrobe now anyway." I corrected.

"Mmm, I love beef and bean burritos."

"I know." I smiled round at him, savouring a kiss. "That's why I'm making em."

"Thank you G." He grabbed two beers from the fridge, setting one for me down on the side. "You know when it's just the two of us, I feel like we could actually be a real couple."

"You wonna go into hibernation the rest of our lives?" I teased.

"No smart ass." He laughed, poking me in the side. "How would we pay for food and stuff?"

"We could sell sea shells by the sea shore." I joked, getting poked in the side again. "You know I've always wanted to be a rock singer."

"You?" He asked shocked.

"Think I'm terrible at singing?"

"I've never heard yah sing, so I wouldn't know." He laughed, leaning against the counter beside me.

"What about a surfing instructor? We could move down to the beach, our own little private shack?" I suggested.

"I don't know how to surf."

"I can, I haven't done it in years, but it's easy." I grinned round at him.

"I would love to see that." He winked, raising his beer to his lips. "You think you could really leave the job behind though G?"

"Probably, if I had enough of an incentive." I smiled looking up at him.

"I kinda like my job . . . not the murders part obviously . . . the helpin' people and solvin' puzzles side of it though, definitely."

"But are we really making any difference? The crime rate never goes down and we put ourselves in mortal danger every day." I added.

"I think we're makin' a difference. All the people we've put behind bars . . . the worlds a slightly better place with em off the streets."

"But it's not getting better though." I took a swig of my beer, looking up into his eyes. "What if one of us dies on the job? Like Holly did, would you change your mind then?"

"Depends who it was."

"Brass?" I asked.

"Might do."

"What about Grissom?"

"That would give me more of a reason." He nodded.

"Hodges?" I asked watching his face break into a smile. "What about me?"

He looked at me a moment then laced his hand with mine. "I don't think I could live without you. I'd not only give up on the job . . . but life too."

"No one's ever cared about me that much."

"I do." He pressed a kiss to my cheek then gave me a wide grin. "I'm gonna see what's on TV." I nodded watching him walk over to the couch then continued preparing our burritos. "Have you ever watched day time TV? It really sucks." Nick called from the couch.

"Well technically it's 2am." I snickered looking at the time. "I doubt they put anything on TV because people are supposed to be in bed."

"Not us though." He laughed. "What movie did you wonna watch?" He shouted, heading over to the alphabetised DVD collection against the wall.

"Completely up to you." I called back, serving the burritos onto two plates. I walked into the front room, setting the plates down on the coffee table.

"Thank you." Nick smiled, climbing over the couch to wrap his hands around my waist. "I'll make us dinner next time, anythin' you fancy... that I can cook." He added with a laugh as he dropped onto the couch.

"You don't have to do that Nicky." I picked up his plate to hand it to him, being pulled onto his lap. I held the plate steady as he locked our lips, engaging in another luscious Nick Stokes kiss. _Mmmm!!!_

"I want to . . . Thank you." He smiled, taking the plate from my hands. "For this . . . and earlier." He smiled wider.

"You're welcome. What movie did you wonna watch?"

"What new films have you got?" He asked, gazing lovingly into my eyes.

"I just recently bought Assault on Precinct 13 with Laurence Fishburne." I climbed over the sofa to look through the rest. _Brokeback Mountain, but I think that's a little extreme for our first movie date. _"Fun with Dick and Jane?" I asked holding up the case. Nick looked at it then nodded. "You haven't seen it have you?"

"Nope, but I love anythin' with Jim Carrey, he's hilarious." Nick smiled, digging into the burrito I made him. I sighed heavenly, setting up the disc in the player then returning to the couch where Nick pulled me against him into his loving open arms. I grabbed my plate, leaning back against the pillows beside him with our feet up on the table as we dug into the delicious meal. _I'm so glad my mom taught me how to cook. It's really paid off._

Once we finished our burritos, we set our plates down on the table. Nick sat against the end of the sofa with his feet up on the table with me resting against his chest, his arms wrapped tightly around my chest while my legs were up on the rest of the couch. _A perfect movie snuggle!_ We laughed at all the same parts, snuggling up closer to each other the whole way through. _It was a dream come true!_

"Hey G..."

"Yeah?" I looked up into his eyes, seeing he was a little nervous about asking whatever he was going to ask me.

"Out of curiosity . . . are you . . . you know in bed . . . are you a giver or receiver?"

"Receiver, or bottom . . . I've never topped anyone, not even a woman." He nodded, still looking into my eyes as though he wanted to ask me a few more questions. "You can ask me anything Nicky, when I first started seeing guys I was constantly asking questions."

"That's what I did with my brother, asked him loads of questions about girls. He made me watch porn and stuff."

"Well I won't necessarily make you do that." I chuckled. "You're bound to have questions for this huge life changing event, so don't be nervous . . . just ask."

"Okay . . . so if we _were_ to..."

"Have sex? If you wanted to . . . I'd imagine you'd be the top. It doesn't mean you're more masculine or that I'm more feminine like most people think. I just prefer it that way round. Although I've never given, so I wouldn't know for sure."

"Okay." His cheeks flushed red again as he nodded.

"I'd imagine you'd be a versatile top too."

"What's that?"

"Shared dominance in the relationship while you prefer to be the top in bed. Much like when we're out in the field."

"How do you know for sure though?"

"Experimentation." I grinned up at him. "Do you enjoy anal sex with the ladies?" He awkwardly nodded. "So you know you like topping, you might want to try bottoming once, just to see what it's like, it doesn't hurt as much as you'd think . . . first time for sure, but after that it feels natural."

"Okay." He awkwardly nodded again.

"But you are a bit of a control freak." I teased. "You might not like to be dominated."

He nodded in agreement. "And you? You like it?"

"I like being dominated, none of that squicky S&M stuff though."

"We all suspected as much." He laughed. "What about the liquid latex fetish of yours?"

"That . . . is not as bad as it sounds." I giggled. "I've never actually used it though. But I do like to be possessed."

"Okay . . . thanks for clearin' that up."

"That's okay. Anything else you wanted to know?"

"No, no . . . I'm good for now. I never thought Greg Sanders would be coachin' me on sex though." He laughed.

"You ashamed of being coached on sex by the little lab rat?" I snickered.

"Not so much ashamed . . . I feel a little out of place. I've been the confident one in my relationships since I first started datin' . . . now I'm startin' from scratch again and my partner knows all the ins and outs . . . it just feels a little weird."

"It's not _that_ much different. Sure I have a penis and lack of breasts . . . but the relationship stuff is still pretty much the same. You can still be the confident one Nicky. I'm not one of these guys that dives straight into sex, throwing romance out the window. I like to snuggle, be wined and dined . . . and I love to talk." I chuckled.

"Yeah I kinda noticed that last one. So anythin' else I should know about you?"

"Umm... I don't do cross dressing, I'm not into drag, I don't have any piercings or tattoos and I'm self conscious about my scars . . . oh and rimming is a definite no, no for me and I have a fetish for men in uniforms . . . never women though. I'm clean too." I added. "So you don't have to worry about catching anything and we're tested on the job all the time." Nick smiled widely, licking his lips. "What?"

"Nothin' . . . bein' with you is so surreal, I keep thinkin' I'm gonna wake up from this dream world and I'd be so angry and disappointed that I never got this close to you. You're the most amazin' person I've ever met and you never cease to amaze me."

"Thank you."

"No thank you Greg, I wouldn't ever wonna change a thing about you . . . I love you, just as you are." Nick smiled; looking down at me then saw me wipe my eye with the back of my hand. "You're not cryin' are you G? It was meant to make you happy."

"No I am, really happy." I smiled, wiping my other eye as the happy tears slid down my cheeks. "No one's ever said anything like that to me before." I sniffed hard, turning in his arms so we were face to face. "I guess there's no mistaking who the girl is in the relationship, huh?"

"You're allowed to cry G, but I promised I wouldn't make you cry again. Now I feel awful."

"Don't, this is a happy teary Greg. I thought I was gonna be alone forever, that no one was ever gonna be able to love me or tolerate me . . . I love everything about you too Nicky."

"Good." He rasped, pressing our lips together for a slow sensual kiss. "Oh . . . and you know what you said. That you're all mine?" I nodded. "I'm all yours too."

* * *

**Please Review**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter, their first interractions and everything. Nick is starting to enjoy his lifestyle with Greg, but he's still a little hesitant. I hope you liked the scenes where Nick was teching Greg how to shave and tie a bow-tie, I really enjoyed writing them.**

**Thanks to Tish for beta-ing**

**Thanks so much for all your lovely reviews! I love reading them, they really make my day. Thanks to 'DeliciousSin', 'AllyKat001', 'katwinchester', 'janet1982' & 'MelsieR' for all your feedback :D**


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen:**

"Mornin'." Nick smiled as I opened my eyes; he was resting against the pillow beside me, watching me sleeping.

"Morning." I yawned, stretching out. "Are you going into work today?"

"Yep, you got the day off, doncha?" I nodded, looking up into his eyes. "Is your flight tomorrow?"

"Yep, just before noon."

"I'm gonna miss you G." I watched his face spread into an adorable smile as he ran his eyes across me.

"What are you grinning at?" I asked.

"You . . . you look cute as hell with your hair all messed up." He teased, ruffling his hand softly through my hair. "That's the first time I've ever told you I think your cute."

"It is." I beamed a wide grin up at him. "You really think I'm cute?"

"Definitely, why do you think every time I see that adorable smile of yours I break into a smile too? I've been thinkin' you're cute for years . . . I just never told you." Bursting into a wider grin, I licked my lips, looking up into his eyes as he advanced closer to me, softly kissing my lips. "You know I used to listen to my sisters go all head over heels for their boyfriends when we were kids, I never knew what all the fuss was about, but I've never fallen for anyone before you. I felt like I was missin' out on somethin' big."

"You were . . . I told you how great love feels."

"You did. I shoulda listened to yah genius, huh?" Nick broke into an ecstatic smile, inching closer towards me to softly kiss my lips again as he slid a hand down my side. "I used to think I'd never find out what love felt like, now that I'm with you, I never wonna let go of it . . . or you." He rasped against my lips, kissing me hungrily. He pulled me closer towards him, smoothly sliding his hands down my pyjamas to caress my body. "Do you wonna sleep a little more, or you wonna join me in the shower?"

"You enjoyed it that much, huh?" I grinned widely, playfully biting his lower lip as he slipped his tongue into my mouth again. He nodded pulling back slightly.

"I definitely enjoyed it." Nick whispered against my ear, pulling my hips right against his. He moaned softly against my mouth as our hardened bodies brushed together. "So whaddya say G, wonna shower with me?"

"I'd love to take a shower with you." Nick immediately swept back the covers off our bodies, pulling me to my feet in his arms. "Someone's eager." I giggled against his parted lips as he guided our bodies off to the bathroom.

"Your fault for bein' so damn sexy, Sanders." He slid his hands beneath my pyjama top, gasping against my mouth. "It feels like a lifetime ago that I was too afraid to touch you." He whispered, softly sucking on my neck as he started to unbutton my pyjama shirt.

"I'm glad you feel more comfortable with me." I pulled his t-shirt up from the rim, lifting it over his head as he guided our bodies back towards the shower.

"I do, I've never felt this comfortable with anyone this fast." He admitted, sliding my shirt off my shoulders then dipping his hands beneath my pyjama bottoms. "It doesn't feel weird to touch you anymore, I feel like I've been gay my whole life."

I grinned at his adorableness. "Technically you have been gay your whole life Nicky, you just never gave into it until now." I chuckled.

"Oh." He chuckled softly, sliding his own pyjama bottoms down with mine. "Thank you for bein' patient with me . . . and helpin' me." He took hold of the waist band of my boxers, bravely sliding them down my legs as I stepped out of them.

"You're welcome." I smiled; doing the same with his then stepped into the shower with him. Nick pulled the curtain across as I fiddled with the temperature of the water. Once the water was pouring down over our bodies, Nick started kissing me hungrily again.

"Mmmm, I love kissin' you." He rasped against my lips, softly gliding his tongue across my lower lip.

"Good, coz I love your kisses." I smiled back. Nick closed his mouth over mine, making me see stars already just from a kiss. He feathered his fingertips down my chest, pulling my body closer against his. I could tell he was eager to experience the same pleasure he had yesterday _and who was I to deny him that?_ Only this time he was slightly more confident, exploring my body with his fingertips. His lips found my neck, kissing and marking, making me melt under the touch. He sucked gently between kisses, licking and lightly nibbling, pulling my hips closer to his, grinding them together.

Nick momentarily stopped his kisses, pulling back to moan softly. He stood still, letting his eyes wander over my body. "I love your body Greg." He whispered against my ear, sliding his hands down the ridges in my back.

"Even my scars?" I asked as his hands lingered over them.

"Even your scars." He nodded, turning me slightly so he could get a better look. "I've never seen them this close before." His fingers delicately smoothed down the largest one as his eyes wandered across my back. "Do they hurt?" I shook my head, loving the feel of his soft fingertips sliding down my back. "I can't believe you almost died Greg." His voice choked up. He lowered his mouth to one of my scars, softly kissing it, making me fall in love with him even more. I turned in his arms, wiping the water from my eyes to see the expression on his face more clearly. "You're so beautiful Greg." He whispered softly, smoothing his fingertips through my hair.

"You don't think their disgusting or make me look like a monster?" He shook his head, turning me in his arms again to softly coat the monstrous looking scars in delicate butterfly kisses. Nick came up for air, licking a hot line towards my neck as he slid his slippery wet hands down my body to hold my hips. He turned to face me again, scouring his tongue down my chest, taking one of my nipples in his mouth, gently licking and sucking before he moved to the other. I moaned under the angelic touch, leaning back against the shower wall as he bit down lightly over my left nipple, erupting a strangled moan from my lips. I reached my hands out to touch him, but he took my hands, placing them back at my sides as he explored my chest with his tongue. He let his left hand drift down my thigh, gently feathering his fingertips towards the inside of my leg, closing his mouth over mine once again.

As I looked into his eyes I could clearly see the love shining in his delicious chocolaty brown eyes. He curved his hands from my shoulders down to my hips, pulling my body closer to his once again, smoothing his palms around to my back. He held me tightly against his own body so I could feel his heartbeat and breathing against my own chest, making me feel as though I was in heaven. "I could stay like this forever." He whispered, softly nibbling my earlobe.

"I was just thinking the same thing." I beamed a smile at him, capturing his lips for a slow passionate kiss. His hands gradually drifted down my back, caressing the curves of my ass, it was the first time he had actually allowed his hands to drift south of my waist. "Did you take that last step out of your closet there cowboy?" I asked with a wide smile on my face.

"Possibly . . . I had an amazin' dream about you." He rasped, kissing me while he curved his hands down my body once again. "That and you were makin' some funny noises beside me last night." He snickered.

"What kinda noises?" I asked, gritting my teeth together.

"Hot as hell." He rasped, grinding his body against my hips. I stood perfectly still, allowing him to explore my body with his hands. It wasn't long before his body started to shudder against mine; he moaned my name against my lips, kissing me hungrily as I too came against him. I felt my knees start to weaken as I collapsed completely against his body, being held in his strong arms.

We stayed under the water in each other's arms for a further few minutes until the water started to get cold. We climbed out the shower, drying each other off with the warm towels, once again engaging in an affectionate hungry kiss before Nick had to dash off to get ready for work.

I pulled some fresh boxers on, climbing back on the bed, watching Nick getting ready for work. He pulled a blue shirt over his broad golden shoulders, turning to face the mirror as he buttoned it up, hiding his luxurious chest beneath the fabric. He then pulled a pair of his impossibly tight jeans on that really did wonders for his perfectly formed ass and strong thighs.

Nick turned to face me looking at my wide grin. "Are you undressin' me with your eyes G?"

"Might be." I grinned wider.

"Well don't, you're gonna make me late." He laughed, leaning across the bed to kiss me. "If you undress me with your eyes, I'll be forced to do it for you."

"No complaining here." I deviously giggled, pulling his body closer to mine. He closed his mouth over mine, caressing my sides with his hands.

"Greg, I can't stay." He complained, but I captured his lips again, ignoring his protest. "G C'mon, I gotta go." He whispered pulling apart again. "I'll call you later." He kissed me again then climbed off the bed to straighten his shirt out.

"Hey Nicky." I called after him. I waited until he looked round at me to speak. "I love you."

"I love you too Greg." He smiled back, making a warm swirling feeling form in my stomach. He grabbed his belt, putting it through the loops of his jeans then grabbed his jacket and shoes, one more quick kiss and he was off out the door. "Bye!" He shouted.

"Bye." I pulled the covers over myself again, dozing off to sleep for a little longer before I had to go to the grocery store and start to pack for my vacation to California for my parents wedding. Something I really wasn't looking forward to and I was really going to miss Nick too.

* * *

I eventually got up a few hours later, pulling some sweat pants on as I made my way towards the kitchen to grab some food. I made myself a coffee, leaning against the counter as I waited for the water to boil. I then looked around for something to eat, finding one slice of bread, tiniest bit of butter and one slice of cold pizza left in the fridge. _I really have to go shopping. _I groaned looking round at the time. It was only eight o'clock in the morning; I'm usually working around this time, not just getting out of bed.

I finished off my coffee then grabbed a t-shirt from the laundry pile, pulling it over my head as I grabbed Nick's shopping list left out on the side. Under the list he even wrote '_I love you G'_, with a little smiley face, immediately bringing a wide smile to my face. _My boyfriends so romantic! _I shoved the list into my pocket, grabbing my sneakers and keys as I made my way out the door towards the elevator.

On the car drive there I received a text message from Nick.

_Got to work double shift. I love you! See you later G._

I pulled up into the Wal-Mart car park, texting a message back to him.

_Okay! I love you too Nicky. Just gone grocery shopping._

I shoved my phone in my pocket, locking the car as I got out, checking I still had the list in my pocket. I grabbed a trolley, walking round the store, making sure I grabbed everything Nick asked for. Coming towards the end of my shopping spree, I walked towards the last aisle to get my hair gel, stopping in my tracks as I saw Ryan stocking up on his condoms and lubricant. I ducked at the end of the aisle, losing my footing as I toppled through a tall display of canned tomatoes. _Ouch! _I crashed through the cans, toppling over to my knees and elbows, drawing more attention to myself. _As usual! _My mother did used to say I was like a bull in a china shop. _I guess she was right._

"Greg!" Ryan's voice shouted, he reached out for my hands to help me up, but I crawled out of his reach, helping myself up. "Look Greg, I've been meaning to call you. I'm really sorry, you know, about what happened."

"Whatever." I mumbled, rubbing my elbows as I winced in pain from my sore knees.

"Greg please, just gimme a chance." He asked stepping closer towards me.

"No." I pulled away from him before he could touch me, quickly wheeling my trolley away to the checkout, _without my hair gel!_ It wasn't until I got back to my car that I realised how much I was shaking, just from a face to face interaction with the asshole.

"Greg!" He shouted, running towards me. I went for the driver's door, trying to get away before he reached me. "Greg Stop!" He demanded, grabbing me by the arms. "Please Greg; just let me talk to you!"

"I don't want to talk you!" I shouted, trying to pull away from him, but as always he was that little bit stronger than me.

"Look Greg, I'm really sorry about what happened."

"Yeah right." I fumed at him angrily. "You couldn't give a toss about me..."

"But I do, that's why I wanted to talk to you."

"Why didn't you try and talk to me then instead of waiting to bump into me at the grocery store?" I shouted, shoving him away from me. "You're not sorry at all..."

"But I am! If you would just listen to me!" He shoved me angrily, hitting me in the chest hard with both fists, causing me to fall back against the side of my car. "I am sorry you little shit!"

"Yeah, really sounds it." I mumbled, rubbing my chest.

"I'm sorry I tried to force you."

"Whatever . . . apology NOT accepted. Leave me alone!" I pulled my car door open, starting up the car and driving off back home as quick as I could.

* * *

"Greg!" Nick shouted entering the apartment. "I got your messages, you sounded scared shitl..." He stopped talking as he reached the kitchen seeing me sat on the counter holding one ice pack to my knee and another to my elbow. "What happened?" He asked walking in.

"You didn't have to rush home Nicky."

"I did coz you sounded scared shitless. What happened?" Nick stood in front of me peeling back the ice pack from my knee to inspect the injury.

"Oh this . . . this is nothing . . . I fell through a display of canned tomatoes." Nick looked at me with his eyebrows raised. "That's not what I called you about."

"What or who were you duckin' out of the way from then?"

I looked into his eyes then sighed heavily. "Ryan."

"Did he see you?"

I looked into Nick's gorgeous eyes, wondering if I should tell him or not. "No." I decided to lie. "He was down the condom aisle."

"What were you doin' down there?" Nick asked curiously.

"Hair gel." I pointed to my hair making him smile. "I didn't get any though, I'm all out now." I pouted. Nick placed his hands on my thighs, leaning closer to capture my lips softly.

"You're safe Greg; he can't hurt cha . . . not again." He whispered softly, resting his forehead against mine.

"Did I really sound that scared?"

Nick nodded, brushing his fingertips across my jaw line. "You sounded like you were hyperventilating."

"Sorry . . . were you busy?"

"Never too busy for you G." He gently pulled the ice pack from my elbow, tenderly kissing the bruised muscle along with my exposed knee. "How does it feel?"

"Better." Nick smiled, licking his lips as he sank closer to me, sucking my tongue into his mouth, gently caressing it with his own. _I love his kisses. They're to die for!_

"Mmmm, I love comin' home to you." He smiled against my lips, sliding me closer to the edge of the counter.

"Are you all done with work?" I asked, placing my hands on his shoulders.

"Yep, but I gotta meet Starla in twenty minutes. I wanted to come back and check on you first." He cupped my face in his hands, kissing me passionately, only breaking for a few seconds at a time for air.

Nick slowly pulled back, panting heavily, resting his forehead against mine again. He slid his hands down my shoulders and sides to rest at my hips. "I'm sorry . . . I have to go, you know how pissy Starla gets."

"It's okay." I smiled. "Will I see you later?"

"What times your flight?"

I looked at the clock on the wall. "Eleven . . . less than three hours."

"I'll be back before then." Nick smiled, softly pressing his lips to mine again. "Do you want me to get you your hair gel?"

"Make sure you buy the right one." I warned him.

"I will." He chuckled. "I wouldn't mess with your hair products." He teased, rubbing our noses together. "I really am gonna miss yah G."

"My offer still stands..."

"Greg, you know I can't..."

"Not as my date, just as a friend." I added. He anxiously bit his lip, looking into my eyes. "Forget I ever said anything." I backtracked, grabbing the ice pack again to hold to my still throbbing elbow.

"I'll be back later, with more kisses and hair gel." He smirked, kissing my lips once again. He went to leave but pulled me into his arms for a warm bear hug. "I can't believe how much I miss you already." He chuckled against my ear. I winced slightly from my sore chest being pressed up against his. _Ryan hits surprisingly hard for someone who doesn't work out_. "What's wrong?" Nick asked pulling back, setting me back on the counter.

"Nothing, I'm fine." I shook my head, picking up the ice pack holding it to my elbow. "You better go."

"Have you packed yet?" I shook my head. "You better get to it then Greg; you're leavin' in less than three hours."

"I'm going now." I jumped off the kitchen counter, setting the ice pack's down on the side as I folded my trouser leg back down.

"Okay, I'll see you in a bit." He kissed me again then made his way off out the front door. Once he was gone I lifted my t-shirt slightly to look at the fist shaped bruises on my chest. "Knew you were hidin' somethin'." Nick's voice startled me. I looked up at him shocked, letting my t-shirt fall back into place. "He did see you didn't he?"

"Kind of." I sheepishly nodded.

"Lemme see." Nick asked, stepping closer to me. I placed my hands at my sides, allowing him to lift my t-shirt, examining the bruises. "Why didn't you tell me Greg?"

"I didn't want you to worry."

"Of course I'm gonna worry G, did he hit you?"

"Shoved me . . . to be more accurate." Nick softly ran his fingertips across my chest. "Aren't you gonna be late to meet Starla."

"Who cares," He shrugged, pulling my t-shirt slightly higher. "Where does this guy Ryan live?"

"I can't tell you that."

"Why not?" He asked, looking into my eyes.

"Coz I don't want you to do something stupid!"

"Greg he freakin' hurt you again and I'm just supposed to stand back and let it happen? What if next time he does somethin' worse?" He tried to reason with me. "Just tell me where he lives."

"Nicky you're no good to me behind bars."

"I'm not gonna kill him, lord knows he deserves it. I'm just gonna talk to him." Nick let go of my t-shirt, waiting for my answer. "C'mon Greg, where does he live?"

"I can't tell you Nicky."

Nick huffed loudly, folding his arms across his chest. He looked around the room then had a sudden idea. "What's his second name again?" He walked over to the coffee table, pulling out the phone book from underneath it, letting his fingers do the walking. "Clark wasn't it?" He asked, scanning through the phonebook.

"Nicky, you can't do anything."

"I'm just gonna talk to him." Nick found his address, writing it down on the palm of his hand. He made his way towards the door, but I got in his way, stopping him from leaving.

"Nicky, I really appreciate you doing this for me, but I can't let you go."

"Yes you can Greg; you can't let this asshole do this to you again!"

"Fine!" I huffed. "But I'm going with you."

"Fine by me." I stepped aside, allowing him to open the door, following after him towards the elevators. "You really should be packin' though." He advised as the elevator doors closed.

"I'm sure I left some stuff over my mom's house anyway and she always buys me new stuff when I visit." I smiled over at him.

The car drive over was deadly silent. I was worried Nick was going to completely lose it and end up beating Ryan to a bloody pulp. _Not that he didn't deserve it! _But Nick didn't deserve jail.

Once we arrived I reluctantly followed Nick up the stairs, towards the door of Ryan's apartment. I can't even count the amount of times I've knocked on this door then been thrown right out after a sinful act of sex.

Nick dragged me towards the door, pounding hard with his fist. "Maybe we should go?" I suggested in a low whisper. Nick shot a look at me, waiting for Ryan to answer the door. He pounded again with a tense clenched fist, gritting his teeth as he impatiently waited. "Maybe he's not home?" _Spoke too soon!_ Ryan opened the door, looking completely shocked to see me and Nick at his door.

"Greg? What are you..." He looked between me and Nick, completely confused. "What are you doing here?"

"I'll tell you what we're doin' here. You think it's fun to hit people? Beat people up? Make em scared of you? You like makin' people into victims, huh?" Nick shouted, getting angrier with each statement, even starting to make me jump.

"I don't know what Greg told you..." Ryan started, but Nick stepped through the door, shoving him up against the wall.

"Greg didn't have to tell me anythin' you son of a bitch! There's a word for people like you, it's pathetic! You make people do what you want with your fists! You're weak!" Nick shouted, holding handfuls of Ryan's shirt while he continued to intimidate him, forcing him up against the wall.

"Look who's talking, Greg couldn't fight his own battles so he had to bring you along? How pathetic does that make him?" Ryan retorted, staring right back into the increasingly angry Texan. _Bad idea Ryan!_

Nick shook him angrily, slamming him back against the wall. "Greg." Nick said in a much calmer tone as he turned towards me. "Can you wait outside a second?" I looked at him a moment, not sure if I trusted him to be alone with Ryan, thinking he was going to kill him or something, but I nodded, reluctantly turning to leave.

I stopped at the staircase, trying to listen to their muffled voices. I could hear Nick talking _almost_, from the sounds of it he was intimidating Ryan, warning him to never come near me again. I heard a loud thump, someone writhing in pain then more loud shouts. I anxiously waited for Nick by the stairs door. Hoping he wasn't the one that got hit.

Suddenly I heard the crash of some furniture, shouts of pain, followed by a deadly silence.

I swallowed hard, clenching my fists at my sides as I watched a shadow coming towards me down the hall...

* * *

**Please Review**

**Took a little longer to write, couldn't get the last part the way I wanted it to go, but I think this is the best version. Hope you like it!**

**Thanks to Tish for beta-ing**


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen:**

The shadow gradually approached with slow broad steps. I backed up against the wall behind me, too fearful to move. _Did Nicky get hit? Was I about to get my ass kicked too? Or did Nick get one over Ryan? _I gulped hard, hearing the heavy pounding of my heart in my throat as the footsteps drew nearer and nearer. I involuntary started to shiver from the fear; goosebumps started to form all up my arms and the hairs on the back of my neck stood on end.

The figure slowly rounded the corner into my line of sight...

"Nicky." I gasped in relief. "Wh-What happened?"

"Ryan's got somethin' he wants to say to you. C'mon." Nick reached out for my hand, taking it in his own. I walked back with him towards Ryan's apartment door, seeing Ryan's coffee table broken as though someone had been pushed through it. Ryan was perched on the arm of the sofa with blood gushing from his nose. "Well?" Nick boomed at him angrily. "Don't you have somethin' you wonna say to Greg?"

"Greg..." He choked, looking at Nick apprehensively. "I-I'm so sorry for what I did to you . . . For everything I did to you . . . I'm so very sorry . . . I don't want you to forgive me . . . but I'll never bother you again. I swear it." He added looking at Nick. _Wow! That sounded like he really is sorry . . . for once._

I looked up at Nick wide eyed with surprise, gently squeezing his hand tighter with mine. For the first time in my life I felt protected, like someone actually cared for me and he was standing right next to me. _So what if he had beaten Ryan up when I asked him not to. I love him!!! _I wanted to hug him right there, but I thought I'd wait until we're alone.

"Say goodbye to Ryan, G."

"Goodbye Ryan!" I waved with a wide smile on my face. Nick pulled the door shut with a loud bang, still holding my hand as he led us off towards the stairs. I stopped him as we reached the door down, throwing my arms around him to hug him tightly. "Thank you Nicky." I whispered against his neck.

"You're welcome. He won't be brothering you again." He whispered back, pressing a kiss to my cheek as he smoothed his hands up and down my back.

"Did you hit him?" I asked pulling back slightly. Nick bit his lip, nodding faintly. "That's awesome!" I burst into a wide grin, looking up at my hero. "I would have loved to have seen that."

"I wanted to beat him to a bloody pulp for what he did to you. But he gave up too quick." He snickered.

"I'm glad you didn't. As much as Ryan deserves it . . . you don't deserve prison."

He smiled; pressing a moist gentle kiss to my lips. "I'll always protect you G, no matter the consequences." He whispered softly, brushing his fingers through my hair. "I love you."

"I love you too Nicky." He smiled wider, lacing his fingers with mine as he led the way down the stairs, back to his truck in the parking garage.

I never felt happier to be leaving Ryan's apartment, before I was a disposal wash rag to him, using me then tossing me out the door, now I had a loving boyfriend who was willing to defend me against the jerk, making me feel whole. I no longer needed Ryan to make me feel alive, because now I had Nick and I was really living.

* * *

Nick drove back to our apartment building, giving me a passionate smooch in the truck right outside. "What was that for?" I asked, breathlessly pulling apart.

"I really felt like your boyfriend there, defendin' yah!" He smiled, caressing the side of my face with his hand. "Listen I gotta go see Starla for this stupid baby thing. I'll grab your hair gel on the way back too . . . you go pack. You got less than two hours now." He reminded me, checking the clock in his truck.

"Okay. If Starla yells at you, you can totally blame me."

"She's not my number one priority anymore G." He smiled, capturing my lips for another tender kiss. "You are." He whispered softly. "I'll be back as soon as I can."

"Okay." I pushed the car door open, steadily climbing out. I turned back to look into his eyes, feeling his love as looked back at me. "Thank you again for doing that for me Nicky . . . I really love you."

"You're welcome . . . I really love you too." He smiled wider. I closed the door, waving him off then walked into the apartment building heading up to my floor.

I immediately started packing my things into my suitcase, folding my shirts, t-shirts and trousers carefully then set my suitcase down in the front room while I anxiously waited for Nick to return. I wanted to kiss and hug him as much as I could before I left for California. I still wanted him to come with me, but I couldn't force him, he was still just getting used to me. _I was just happy to finally have a boyfriend at last!_

Before I knew it I dozed off to sleep, dreaming of Nick's intimate touch.

* * *

"Greg!" Nick shouted, startling me awake. "God I yelled your name like five times." He chuckled, sitting on the coffee table in front of where I was laying. "Got your hair gel." He smiled, holding out the tub. "Did you pack?" I sleepily pointed over to my suitcase, rubbing my eyes awake. "Greg you gotta wake up buddy. Your flight leaves soon." He softly brushed his fingers through my hair, looking into my eyes. "C'mon Greg."

"I am awake." I sleepily mumbled. Nick tickled my exposed stomach, waking me up properly as I giggled and squirmed beneath him.

"You are now." He smirked. "I got you your hair gel." He told me again.

"Thank you." I yawned.

"You're welcome." He rested his chin on his hand, watching me stretching out on the sofa.

"How was Scarla?" I asked.

"Star-la?" He smirked.

"That's what I said."

"She was a bit pissy that I was late, but I didn't care." He mumbled.

"Get a new picture of the baby?" He nodded, pulling it out his pocket to show me. He didn't seem all too happy about it though. "What's up Nicky?" I asked, yawning again as I sat up to face him.

"Nothin' . . . I was just thinkin'." He smiled softly, placing his hands on my knees, licking his lower lip as he looked up into my eyes.

"Thinking about what?"

"Do you wonna..." He awkwardly looked up at me, trying to think of a way to say whatever he was going to tell me.

After a long moments silence, I spoke up. "Fool around?" I suggested. His adorable blushing smile gave it all away. "I'd love to." I set the picture down on the coffee table beside him, climbing to my feet, grabbing his hands as I stood up, pulling him off towards the bedroom.

"W-Wait." Nick pulled against me, stopping us from advancing towards the bedroom. "I-I don't wonna, you know have..." Nick awkwardly tried to explain.

"We don't have to have sex Nicky; there are other things we can do that's just as fun." I licked my top lip in slow motion, teasing him as I looked into his eyes. "C'mon . . . I'll prove it."

"Okay." He nodded, putting his trust in me.

I proceeded towards the bedroom with him in tow, kicking my shoes off then climbed onto the bed, lying on my back across the middle. Nick removed his coat and shoes, crawling on top of me. He straddled my thighs, watching as I pulled my t-shirt off my head, throwing it over my shoulder. His eyes immediately caught sight of my bruised chest, but that didn't stop him from removing his own shirt, gently pressing his chest up against mine so I could feel his heart beat and breathing against my own.

I smoothly ran my hand across the front of his jeans, beginning to feel his body hardening under the touch. I fiddled with his belt, popping his jeans open then slid them off his waist, cupping the globes of his arse through his boxers in both hands as I pulled his hips closer to mine. He moaned softly from the intimate touch then slid his hands beneath my sweat pants, pulling them all the way off my legs. I in turn slipped his boxers off, closing my hand over the end of his hard on.

Nick gasped under the touch, throwing his head back; trying to control himself as he gently bit his teeth into his lower lip.

"It's very simple Nicky." I whispered, softly capturing his lips with mine as I slid my boxers off too so we were both now completely naked. "Just give what you like to receive." I took his left hand with my right, guiding him toward my own erection. "Don't be scared." I whispered against his parted lips, slowly beginning to pump my hand up his erect shaft. Nick let out a strangled moan before he started to do the same to me, kissing me hungrily with each thrust of our fists while our unoccupied hands pawed through one another's hair.

Nick slid his tongue deeper into my mouth, drawing the tip of his tongue along the roof of my mouth, making me start to quiver with excitement. His hand began to pump faster along my body as his moans increased against my lips. Our sweat coated bodies ground against each other, increasing the intense heavenly bliss between us. Nick started to buck his hips towards me, sucking my tongue into his mouth as his body began to shudder.

"Oh my God!" Nick moaned louder, releasing his warm seed into my hand and across my stomach a few seconds later. I continued kissing and massaging him until his body started to calm from the desperate moans and shudders of pure bliss. It wasn't long before I too came in his hand, moaning his name from the expert handling. _You seriously wouldn't believe this was his first time jacking off another man. _He was an expert, no accidental scratches or rough handling, just the perfect professional handling that left me seeing stars.

I crawled back across the bed slightly, grabbing some tissues from the box of Kleenex beside my bed to clean us both off. Nick collapsed back on the bed beside me while I cleaned the warm seed off his stomach and hand, tossing the tissues into the trash can beside my bed. Nick lay perfectly still a moment with his eyes closed, panting heavily as he came down from his high. _I was in heaven right now._ I was hoping he was too, desperately hoping that he wasn't about to freak out over what we just did, but I patiently waited for him to calm down first.

After what seemed like an endless moment, he opened his eyes and turned to face me on the bed with a wide grin plastered across his face. "Wow!" He gasped heavenly. "That was even better than my dream."

"So that's what you dreamed about." I grinned back at him. He nodded pressing his lips to mine, softly smoothing a hand down the front of my chest.

"I never imagined it to be that hot though." He rasped against my lips.

"Is that maybe something you'd want to do with me again sometime?" I asked, licking his upper lip softly.

"Definitely." He rasped, taking custody of my lips with his own again as his hands caressed the exposed skin of my sides. "I really don't want you to go now." He so cutely pouted as he broke apart.

"I'll be back before yah know it." I captured his pouting lip for a sweet seductive kiss, leaving him wanting more as I scrambled off the bed to collect my clothes, quickly getting dressed again.

"What am I gonna do Greg?"

"Without me?" I asked turning to face him as I pulled my t-shirt over my head. Nick scooted over to the other side of the bed, grabbing my hands, pulling me onto his lap.

"About my life, I mean . . . I'm havin' a baby with my soon to be ex-wife, I'm gonna become a father and I have a boyfriend." He looked up into my eyes, softly brushing his fingertips across my jaw line. "A boyfriend who I'm fallin' in love with a little more every day. What the hell am I gonna do?" I looked at him confused, wondering how I was going to answer that question.

"You're not changing your mind about us are you?" I insecurely asked.

"No." He shook his head. "No chance in Hell!" He assured me, wrapping his hands around my body. "You're the only thing I'm sure of Greg. Gettin' a divorce though, I'm down with that part. But becomin' a father . . . to a baby with a woman I can't stand." He clutched his head in his hands, trying to think straight. "I don't want this baby G. I shoulda agreed with her when she was gettin' an abortion."

"I thought you wanted to become a father?"

"Not to a baby with a woman I don't love."

"Even after seeing it on the monitor?" I queried.

"You don't understand Greg, when I see that baby on the monitor; all I can think is that I'm completely screwed. That baby means, even if I divorce Starla, I'm still bound to her for life." He groaned, dropping back to the mattress with me still sat on his naked hips. "How the hell do I get myself into these messes?" He mumbled.

"Well you coulda used a condom." I teased; he looked up at me frowning. "Kidding."

"This is no laughin' matter though G."

I swung my leg over him so I was straddling his hips, looking down into his eyes. "Do you really not want this baby?" He looked back at me, shaking his head. "Well you haven't signed anything yet, so there's still time to back out. Starlas not even _that_ pregnant at the moment either, you never know you might change your mind once you see that baby start to grow its arms and legs, looking more baby-like." I suggested.

"But think about it G . . . if I have a kid . . . won't that put a strain between you and me? How many gay fathers do you know?" He asked me.

I thought about it a moment. "None . . . but that doesn't mean there aren't any out there. You just don't hear about them as often." I explained.

"What about the strain between us? Would you be able to put up with someone else's kid gettin' in the way of you and me? Especially weekends, they're the only day we really get off in a week when we're not packed with work, but I won't be able to spend what little time I actually have off with you coz I'll have to spend time with my kid."

"You really know how to make an argument, doncha?" I chuckled slightly.

"That wasn't an answer G." Nick leant up on his elbows, looking into my eyes. "Could you deal with a part time relationship with me after the babies born?"

"Well we don't know what's gonna happen Nicky, nine months from now . . . anything could happen."

"It's more like seven and a half months." Nick corrected.

"Still a long time though. You don't know what's gonna happen in the next seven and a half months..."

"You don't think we'll still be together?" He asked shocked. "Do you not think we'll last?"

"I don't know . . . anything can happen in seven and a half months Nick. I could get hit by a bus, you could get shot, Starla might even lose the baby or you might decide against the gay life you could have with me." I explained. "You can't make me decide this for you. What if ten years from now you see Starla with some other guy and your kid; calling this stranger their daddy? How would you feel knowing you're really that kid's dad and you missed out on all of that because of me?" I asked. "I couldn't put you through that. You'll have to decide for yourself."

"You really are good with the talkin' aren't yah G?" He chuckled slightly. "When Starla and I had problems we just brushed it under the carpet, pretendin' they weren't there." He slid his hands up my sides, pulling me closer against his body. "I want my life to be with you. That's the only thing I'm sure of right now. I mean you are sittin' on top of me when I'm stark naked." He chuckled nervously, looking up at me. "I've never allowed anyone to do that before. Not even women. It makes me feel really vulnerable. But not with you . . . I trust you completely."

"I'm glad you trust me . . . I trust you too." I smiled down at him. "I feel privileged to be your first too."

"You're my first everythin' G." He admitted. "If we had more time I'd even want to try sex with you." He smiled, blushing with embarrassment. "And I can't believe I just said that." He blushed brighter, looking up at the ceiling.

"We'll save it for when I get back." I winked down at him. "That way you'll have more time to adjust."

"You don't want to?"

"Oh I do, trust me. I'd love to take all seven inches of you Nicholas Stokes." I teased, trailing my fingertips across his bare chest making him blush a much brighter shade of red. "But I'm not gonna give it up as quick as the women do that you're used to." I softly kissed his lips then climbed off him, continuing to pack anything else I needed for my trip to California as time was beginning to run out.

Nick quickly got dressed; handing me my hair gel as I rechecked my suitcase then pulled me into his arms for a bone crushing hug as if I was going off to war or something. "I'm gonna miss you G. Call me when you..."

"As soon as I land." I promised. "I'll miss you too. I'll see you in four days though." I tightened my arms around him, breathing in his strong masculine scents.

"Okay c'mon, we better get you off to the airport then before yah miss your flight." He chuckled slightly, smoothing his palms up and down my back. "I love yah G."

"I love you too." He closed his mouth over mine, kissing me passionately, holding my hips right against his.

"C'mon then . . . let's go or I'll never let you leave." He chuckled, stepping back to pick up my suitcase for me. "Got everythin' you need?"

"Minus one thing I _want_ . . . yeah!" I nodded, shoving my hands into my pockets. He gave me a half smile then pulled the front door open, ushering me out.

I never wanted the journey to the airport to end. Nick turned to look at me every chance he could get. I was hoping he'd change his mind and want to come with me, but he remained silent. We finally had to part ways, giving each other a look of despair.

"I'll see you in a few days G." He smiled. I could easily tell he was trying to hold back his tears as he bit his lip, shoving his hands deep into his pockets.

"Bye Nicky . . . call you later." I winked, licking my lips, trying to taste our last kiss. He did the same with his lips, giving me a wink too. I waved to him, heading through the last gate towards my plane. I could feel my heart pounding inside of me as I left the person I loved most in the world behind me.

I walked through the plane, sitting down at my seat by the window, staring out at the terminal, spotting Nick looking back at me from one of the large windows. I waved as the plane started to take off, feeling my lower lip starting to tremble as Las Vegas airport shrank into the distance, making it's journey off towards California.

* * *

**Please Review.**

**Sorry it's slightly shorter than the other chapters, but I didn't want to drag it out too much. Hope you liked it :D**

**What's Nick going to do without Greg for Four whole days? Keep reading to find out. Thanks so much for all your reviews, I love reading them and they make me want to write more and more for you :D**


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen:**

"Greg honey! Wake up! Breakfasts ready!" My mother's voice shouted up the stairs. I rolled over in the big empty bed, searching for the warmth of Nick's body beside me, but he wasn't there. I sat up, shielding my eyes from the sunlight pouring in through the big windows in my room. It felt weird to be up while the early morning sun was streaming in through the windows, even weirder waking up without Nick at my side. "Gregory!" My mother shouted again.

"I'm coming!" I shouted back. I threw back the covers, pulling on my dressing gown as I sleepily made my way down the stairs, smelling the scents of pancakes and bacon wafting towards me. I continued through to the kitchen, seeing the table set up with syrups and things along with my mother setting down a large stacks of waffles, pancakes, a plate of bacon, large bowl of scrambled eggs and some toast. "Wow, you know I'm not that hungry Mom."

"Nonsense Gregory, get your butt over here and eat." She insisted, indicating to the empty seat. I huffed loudly so she'd hear me, sitting myself down in the empty seat. "Don't be so mopey sweetheart."

"I'm not a morning person." I mumbled, watching as she stacked heaps of food onto my empty plate. "Mom I think that's enough."

"You need some pancakes." She stacked some pancakes onto my plate then poured heaps of golden coloured syrup all over them. "There we go . . . eat up." She smiled, gently patting me on the back.

"Where are you going?" I asked confused as she wasn't sitting down with me and there was no way I could eat all of this by myself.

"I've got bridesmaids dresses to check over, last minute catering arrangements, as it turns out we have three vegans coming to this wedding and they waited until now to tell me. Can you do me a favour today sweetie?" She asked, pulling her jacket on as she checked through her purse. "Can you go to this address," She pulled a posit note from her purse, handing it over to me. "And tell them we need four hundred and twelve chairs."

"Four hundred and twelve?" I asked shocked. "You seriously know that many people?"

"That's how many RSVPS' we got back, so yeah and I left a few open ones for the maybes. Oh, and can you go over to your cousin Becca's; you know where she lives right? Anyway, can you help her with the seating arrangements and things?"

I nodded shoving some pancakes into my mouth. "How many is a few maybes?" I asked curiously.

"Only four, one for my aunt Bessie if her cat get's the all clear she'll be coming along, one for your cousin Emma as she's been very busy with college lately and she doesn't know if she'll get her work done on time. One for your uncle Vincent in case he falls into one of his drunken comas again and forgets about the wedding and one for your blind date." She slyly winked at me.

"Huh?" I asked choking on the pancakes in my mouth. "Blind date? You haven't set me up with someone have you?" I asked annoyed.

"Yes I have and _he _is very nice." She smiled at me, wrapping a scarf around her neck.

"You set me up with a guy?" I asked shocked. "Why would you do that?"

"Don't worry, he's gay too..."

"So?" I hissed at her. "Doesn't mean you have to set me up with him, I have a boyfriend!"

"Yes, but honestly sweetheart, how long is it going to last for?"

_What a bitch! _I thought to myself. "Mom, I'm not going on a blind date with a guy!"

"Yes you are. He's a very nice guy." She smiled then kissed me on the head, ruffling my hair softly. "Don't forget, four hundred and twelve chairs sweetheart."

"Mom!" I groaned as she walked off out the door, completely ignoring me. _Great! As if this wedding couldn't get any worse. Now my mother's set me up with a guy!_

I angrily shovelled some of the pancakes into my mouth before I head off upstairs to take a shower. I've only been showering with Nick the past few days; I missed his warm masculine body being pressed up against mine as the water poured down over our bodies. It felt so lonely stood by myself and this shower stall was even larger than the one I had in my apartment.

I climbed out the shower, wrapping a towel around my waist as I stood in front of the sink to shave the way Nick taught me. _I still managed to draw blood three times, but that's better than my record of twelve times. _I just didn't have the angelic touch like Nick.

I crashed back on my bed after, still feeling sleepy from the time change over. I rolled to my stomach to look at the clock. Nick should be just getting off his shift by now. _Maybe I should call him? _I reached for my phone, rolling to my back as I thought about calling him. I talked to him for a whole hour last night before he went into work, _maybe he doesn't want to talk to me right now? Maybe he just wants to get some sleep? _I don't wonna appear too needy. _Even though technically I am. _I woke up craving him, craved him even more in the shower, now I can't stop thinking about him. _I'm completely addicted to him!_

I snapped open my phone, scrolling through my pictures, finding one I took of Nick and Sara before we were even together, when we all went out for drinks together. I stared at Nick's smile for what seemed like a lifetime, getting completely lost in his eyes. _Maybe I should call him? Just to hear his voice? _I looked at the clock thinking about it a moment then tossed my phone on the side cabinet, pulling on some jeans and a t-shirt.

As I began to style my hair I stared at my phone in the mirrors reflection, feeling pathetic again as I was considering to call him again. _I can't call him yet, at least not for another hour. Maybe I should wait for him to call first? _I nodded to myself to that idea then scrambled across the bed, shoving my phone in my pocket then pulled my sneakers on, heading back downstairs.

I grabbed the posit note with the address I left on the table, along with the rental car keys, heading out the front door to place the stupid chairs order. _There's no way in hell this guy blind date of mine is sitting next to me though! He can sit on the floor for all I care._

* * *

After the visit to the chairs store where the manager assumed I was gay, _he started hitting on me right there, _but I so don't go for the beer belly bald head look, _even if I didn't have a boyfriend already_. The whole time there I was self consciously looking down at my outfit. _I didn't look gay at all! _I don't know why I was so worried anyway, _but having old guys with bigger stomachs then pregnant women, hitting on me really freaks me out._

Straight after I headed in the other direction, pulling up in the driveway of my cousin Becca's house. She's about nine years older than me and she always used to tease me when we were younger because I was so much smarter than her. I hadn't seen her since my college graduation party and even then she picked on me for being a geek. My mom used to tell me she was just jealous of me, but Becca's now married to her Highschool sweetheart with god knows how many kids, family dog, four cars, a very large house and she doesn't work for a living because hubby brings in all the money. _How could she be jealous of me? I'd kill to have her life!_

I reluctantly walked up the paved driveway towards the towering front door, taking a few deep breaths before I extended my right hand, knocking on the solid wooden door that looked just as good as the day they installed it. I glanced through a side window spotting a large television set with surround sound and more DVD's then you could possibly watch if you sat in front of the TV for a whole year, watching them one after the other. _Lucky Bitch. _I shoved my hands into my pockets as I heard her voice calling back to her children, making her way towards the door.

"Greg!" She smiled happily with her kids crowded around her feet. Last I heard she only had six, they seem to have multiplied. "Wow it's so good to see yah!"

"Hi Becca." I awkwardly smiled. I felt a little undressed. Becca was wearing a smart fitted suit and the children were all dressed in their Sunday bests and there's me stood in ripped jeans a crazy colourful t-shirt with spiked hair. _Who are these people? It's not even a Sunday!_

"My Mom said you needed my help with something?"

"Sure, come in honey." She ushered me through the door, shunning the children off towards the garden. "Ouch!" Becca winced in agony as she tripped on something. "Shit! Benny! Pick up your freaking skateboard!" She shouted angrily out the back door. _Okay, maybe they weren't as well mannered as I originally thought._ A small boy ran through the house, picking up the skateboard from his mothers feet, running back outside with his brothers and sisters. "So how you been Greg?" She asked, heading into the kitchen where a baby was sat in a high chair with food all around its face, c_ompletely unalike the other children, but I suppose it's difficult to keep a baby as neat as new pin._

"Um... Okay I guess." I shrugged, shoving my hands deep into my jeans pockets.

"I heard about that lab explosion. That must have been really scary, huh? You were right in the centre of it weren't you?"

"Unfortunately." I nodded. _Let's bring that up as often as possible!_

"So I heard your gay now." I froze against the counter. My jaw dropped and eyes grew wider. _I am so gonna kill my mother! Why the hell would she tell Becca?_

"H-How did you hear that?" I asked nervously.

Becca burst out laughing. "Please Greg! Your mother tells everyone everything. So what made you decide you're gay?" I rolled my eyes at her. _She's still stupid! Nothing's changed._

"I didn't _decide_ to be gay . . . and I'm not gay anyway, I'm bisexual." I corrected annoyed.

"What's the difference?" She asked, grabbing a cloth to wipe the spilled baby food off the counter.

"Well gay guys only go for guys; bisexual guys go for both girls and guys."

"Really?" She asked turning her nose up at me. "So you like guys that dress as girls?"

"What? No! Is this what you needed me for or can I go?"

"So you like girls that dress as guys?" _Oh my god is she kidding me?_

"No, I don't like anyone dressed as anyone. I'm attracted to both guys and girls." She looked at me wide eyed with confusion. _How can someone her age not know what that means?_

"So... do you like girls with hairy legs and stuff? Or men that are more feminine?" I groaned heavily, slapping my hand into my forehead in frustration. "Sorry, I don't understand."

"Okay let's say... here." I grabbed a magazine off her counter that had a man and a woman pictured on the front page. "See gay guys would think this guy right here is attractive, they wouldn't even look at the woman. But bisexual guys like myself would think both the man and the woman are attractive. Do you get it?"

She looked at me confused still, chomping on her bottom lip as her mild brain tried to figure out what I was talking about. "How is that not into cross-dressing?" She asked.

"Oh just forget it!" I groaned, dropping the magazine to the side.

"Okay." She huffed, lifting the baby from the high chair. "Can you hold Tony a sec while I go get Madison from her room?"

"How many kids you got?" I asked curiously, taking the gooey covered baby in my hands.

"Only nine." She said so simply. O_nly nine kids? Jeez, how does she keep track of them all? _She wiped down the babies sticky hands before she walked off out the room and up the stairs. I held the baby away from my t-shirt as its clothes were covered in an icky sticky fluid and I didn't really fancy getting whatever it was on my t-shirt. _Even if the baby was smiling so sweetly at me. No exceptions!_

"Hi Greg!" A young man waved as he walked towards the fridge. _Crap, he knows my name, but I have no clue who he is? He's far too young to be Becca's husband and I think her husband had a huge mole on his chin, so it can't be him. Maybe he's Becca's eldest, that would make him... I have no idea what his name is! _He was dressed differently from the other kids; he looked like a younger taller version of me. _But his ears were definitely bigger than mine and he was wearing a baseball cap over his head so I couldn't see what his hair was like._

"Hi." I smiled back, acting friendly.

"I'm Liam." He laughed at me, taking the baby from my hands. "I've seen your picture."

"Oh right, Liam." Her first born that I held for two whole minutes at my graduation and he threw up all over my uniform. _Luckily I don't hold grudges though! _"Wow, so how old are you now?"

"I'm Seventeen." He smiled, setting the baby down in a play pen. "So you back home for your parents wedding?"

"Unfortunately, yeah!" I nodded.

"I heard you work in a crime lab, DNA specialist or something?" I nodded again. "Wow, I wonna work in forensics, but in the field, not the lab. Don't you ever get coped up in there?"

"Well actually . . . if you promise not to tell my mother, I do work in the field." I grinned at him. _Suddenly feeling stupid as I'm nearly thirty years old and still hiding things from my mother._ "I got too coped up in the lab so I took the field test, best job I ever got."

"Wow! That's even better. So is it really as exciting as TV shows make it?" He asked, intrigued to hear more.

"Yeah." I lied slightly as Grissom told me at a conference not to reveal all the messy details to new recruits; it tends to scare them off. "There's a lot of work involved and it does take up a lot of your life . . . but it's definitely worth it, especially knowing that you're saving people's lives."

"What are you pestering Greg about?" Becca scolded her son. "You didn't put any ideas into his head did yah Greg?" I innocently shook my head as Liam gave me the _don't say anything _signal, putting his finger to his lips. Becca clearly doesn't want her eldest to work the same job as me so I kept my mouth shut. "Greg, you need to write a speech too."

"Speech? I hate speeches." I moaned. "Why me?"

"Because you're their only son and your father wants you to." She smirked at me, sitting Madison a small little girl in pigtails down at the table.

"Do you happen to know who my mom's setting me up with?" I asked Becca. She tapped her nose giving me a sly smile. "I thought weddings are supposed to focus on the bride and groom, not their son!" I moaned, sitting down on a spare stool. Liam grabbed a beer from the fridge, popping it open then slid it along the counter towards me. "Thanks." He nodded giving me a wide smile.

"The blind date is a surprise for you though Greg." Becca smiled. "Your mom just wants you to be happy." She grabbed a thick book off the side cabinet, sitting down in front of me with it. "I need your help with the seating arrangements. How's you calligraphy skills?" She asked, handing me a pen and some little name cards.

"This is what you need my help with?"

"Yeah, I've done about a hundred or so, but apparently there's something like four hundred people coming, I'm busy with the kids while my husband's away on business and I'm planning just about everything else for this wedding, so I'd really appreciate it if you help out." She smiled at me. "Please Greg?"

"Can I help?" Liam asked, looking over his mothers shoulder.

"No!" She hissed round at him.

"But I could help." He pleaded. "Greg can't write out all three hundred names by himself." He continued to plead with his big puppy dog eyes.

"Okay fine!" She huffed. "But do it neatly. And Liam, spell people's names correctly. You can use your father's office, show Greg the way." She instructed. Liam nodded, lifting the big book off the counter then leading me through the house that was cluttered with toys everywhere, off towards an office that looked completely professional, with no toys to be seen inside as if it was a child free zone.

"Wow . . . so what is it your dad does?" I asked Liam, looking round at all the pictures with my beer in hand.

"Sales consultant for computer software." Liam cleared a space on the desk, handing me a pen, instructing me to sit on the bigger leather chair behind the desk while he sat on one of the smaller ones in front of it.

"Do you get to see your dad much?" I asked curiously. Liam shook his head, taking half the list to start writing out some of the guest's names. "I know the feeling." I dropped down into the big leather chair, clicking the pen on in my hand, getting to work on the other half of the list, talking to Liam about forensics.

About two hours later my hand began to cramp up. Liam's hand must have felt the same because he stopped to stretch his fingers out a few times. "Hey Greg?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I tell you something, that you promise to never tell my mom or dad?" He asked. I looked at him a moment, wondering if he was about to confess a murder to me or something.

"Um... sure. I promise."

"I heard that you're gay..."

"Bisexual." I corrected. "Has my mother told everyone?" I hissed angrily.

"I overheard my mom on the phone." He looked round at the office door then leant closer towards me. "My point is . . . I think I'm gay. I can't tell my mom or my dad, he would be so disappointed in me."

"Why would he be disappointed in you?" I asked curiously.

"Coz he wants me to play college football, I haven't even told him I got cut from the Highschool team yet."

"How do you know you're gay for sure?" I enquired. "Have you ever been with a guy?" He looked up at me then nodded slightly. "Have you been with a girl too?"

Liam shook his head. "I never get on with girls . . . I don't really find them that attractive either. I prefer guys. Does that make me gay?" He whispered much quieter.

"Sure signs that you might be." I nodded, picking up my pen again to continue writing names on the little cards. "What have you done with guys?"

"Anything really . . . not sex though." He quickly clarified. "I'm still a virgin to both girls and guys."

"That's good. You saving yourself for someone special?" I queried.

"I don't know . . . I just don't really trust anyone right now. Not even my boyfriend."

"I wish I'd waited for someone special." I admitted.

"So when did you know that you were bisexual?" He asked curiously.

"When Jake Tillman kissed me." I smiled looking up at him.

"Who was Jake Tillman?"

"I was tutoring him for chemistry at my house then he made this comment saying there was chemistry between us, next thing I know he was kissing me." I grinned widely remembering the rush of excitement I felt when Jake kissed me. _It was nice to finally be able to share that with someone as I had never told anyone before. _"Even though I felt something for him, I still had a crush on Zoe Hendricks, the cutest girl in school. She was kind of a book geek, but so was I."

"Was he your boyfriend after that?" Liam queried. I shook my head. "Why not?"

"He was a quarter back, I was a geek. He treated me like dirt on school grounds, but as soon as we got back to mine he was all over me." I explained, finishing off another card where the G's in Peggy looked like F's. _Opps, luckily Aunt Peggy is blind she won't see I spelt her name as Peffy._

"My boyfriends on the wrestling team." Liam told me. "He never wants me around at school either." I looked up at Liam noticing he was very similar to me. A tall slender figure and young boyish good looks, he even wore similar clothes to me and he was good at science. Another thing is he lets people walk all over him, _just like me!_

"It's not always easy for people to come out of their closets Liam. My current boyfriend keeps the relationship stuff behind closed doors, we can't even grocery shop together at the moment." _Except that kiss in the car the other day, that was very open and in public, anyone could have been looking._ _God I miss Nick and he still hasn't called!_

"You have a boyfriend now?" He asked, looking up at me from his cards.

"Yep, been going out almost a week now." I smiled widely. "And I'm hoping he might be the one."

"After a week?" He asked surprised.

"I've known him for five years. We were best friends before we took our relationship one step further."

"That's cool." He smiled widely. "I hope I meet someone who loves me."

"You will . . . eventually. I'm not gonna lie to yah, you're probably gonna date some jerks and assholes that rip your still beating heart from your chest every chance they get, but one day you'll find your prince charming." _Maybe I shoulda toned that down a little?_

"Thanks Greg." He smirked.

"You're welcome . . . my hand hurts."

"Mine too." Liam laughed, clenching his fist repeatedly to stretch out his hand muscles a little to take the pressure off. "Wonna go play my x-box for a while?" He suggested.

"Sure." I nodded, even though it wouldn't be anywhere near as fun as playing with Nick.

"I got Halo 2 for Christmas."

"Ooo." I smiled widely. "You're definitely on."

We snuck up through the house past Becca as she was on the phone in the kitchen. We crept up the stair case towards Liam's bedroom at the end of the hall. He ushered me to sit down on the bed while he closed the door then set up the game. While he was loading it up I looked at the stacks of DVD's, CD's and computer games, realising that we have exactly the same tastes. _This kid is so like me it's a little scary. There's meant to be no one like me in the world! Now I'm not unique! _I chuckled to myself at the stupidity of that statement. _He can't be exactly like me._

* * *

"Gregory? Is that you?" My mother shouted as soon as I walked through the door.

"It's me." I shouted, stepping into the kitchen, trying to show her my anger to see if she'd catch on.

"Where have you been all day?" She asked from her position at the table where she was folding lots of napkins up in different ways each time.

"Calligraphy . . . what are you doing?"

"I don't know which one I prefer. Do you like the swan, the lily or the rose... I hope not coz this one took me forever to fold and it still doesn't look like the picture. Or do you like this one, that's called a bishops hat?" She asked holding it up.

"Why doncha just fold them in half, save you loads of time and it looks neat." I smirked, grabbing a beer from her fridge.

"That's not funny Gregory." She scolded me. "Seriously though, which one do you like better?"

"Which one was the easiest one to fold?" I asked, sitting down in a seat opposite her as I opened my beer.

"The lily I suppose." She pointed. "Should I go with that one?" I nodded taking a swig of my beer. "So did you have fun with Becca today?"

"Not really, with her anyway, but with Liam yeah." I nodded. _Damn it, my anger tactic completely failed! I'll just have to confront her about it._

"Really, whaddya do?" She asked, tossing aside the other napkins so she could start folding lilies.

"Calligraphy, played a little x-box. And thanks so much for telling everyone I'm gay by the way. Whaddya go and do that for? Even the people at the damn chairs company knew about me." I shouted at her angrily.

"I only told a few people honey. It's nothing to be ashamed of. I didn't tell the chairs company either, so you can't blame me for that." She pointed out calmly.

"It is something to be ashamed of when you're trying to explain to _the_ biggest dumbo that bisexual doesn't necessarily mean I like women with hairy legs or men that dress as girls. I spent all day trying to explain it to her and I got sicked up on by a baby and a dog!" I shouted furiously, climbing to my feet. "And I'm not writing or doing a speech and I'm certainly not going with this blind date you've set me up with."

"Mark is a very nice man. He's 38 years old, brown hair, brown eyes, slightly taller than you and he works in publishing."

"So! I have a boyfriend; I'm not going with him."

"Yes you are Gregory and I don't like you talking to me in this tone of voice."

"Well you shouldn't have told everyone I'm gay! I'm not gay, I'm bisexual and I don't want everyone knowing about it!" I stormed off up the staircase, stomping my feet angrily to show her how frustrated I was with her.

I kicked off my sneakers as I hit my room, slamming the door shut then set my beer down on the side before throwing myself onto the bed. _How could she betray my trust like that and tell everyone anyway? I told her because I trusted her, but now she's probably gone and blabbed it to everyone that's attending this stupid wedding of theirs. _I pulled my phone out my pocket to check my messages, but I didn't have any. _Wasn't Nick missing me? What's he been doing? He said he'll call me lots but he hasn't called me once! _He's probably too busy moving out of my apartment so he can go back to his straight lifestyle that he's used to. Either that or he's trying other guys that actually have muscles.

I looked at my phone, thinking about calling him, but I decided to wait a little longer as I was in a mood and he should be sleeping right now. It was just three hours before he had to head into work so he was probably fast asleep, _not thinking about me in any way!_

Just as I was changing my mind about calling Nick, my phone suddenly started to ring. I snapped it open with a wide grin on my face. "Hey Nicky."

"_Hi." _Nick's sexy Texan drawl rasped through the phone, pulling at my heart strings, immediately snapping me out of my bad mood too.

"So... what's up, you missing me?"

"_I am actually." _He sighed heavily. "_I thought I'd be able to get on without you..."_

"Oh thanks." I interrupted, rolling to my stomach.

"_No I didn't mean it like that. This is really hard for me Greg. I want you . . . but I can't do __anythin' about it."_

"Why not?" I asked. "I thought you were past the scared to touch me phase?"

"_No it's not that . . . mostly it's because." _He paused a moment clicking his tongue as he tried to think of an explanation. "_Because..." _Nick sighed heavily again. "_Coz you're in California!"_

"Is that your only reason?" I chuckled.

"_For now it's the only one I can think of." _Nick laughed at himself. "_I can't stop thinkin' about you now you're gone. I wanted to give you time to settle before I called you."_

"Oh." _That explains that then. _"So what are you doing awake at this time anyway?" I asked curiously. "Shouldn't you be sleeping?"

"_I can't sleep . . . I've been tryin' for ages but it's really difficult without you here."_

"You're still sleeping in my bed?" I asked surprised. I thought for sure he'd go back to his room that we just painted as soon as I was gone.

"_Yeah, your beds comfier than mine." _He chuckled softly. "_That and it still smells of you."_

"Do you want me to come back?" I queried, hoping the answer was yes at that would give me another reason to leave this god forsaken place.

"_No Greg, your parents weddin's is more important."_

"Not right now it's not." I mumbled, rolling onto my back. "My mom's gone and told my cousin I'm gay, along with who knows who else and she's set me up on a blind date for the wedding."

"_Who?"_

"I don't know. That's why they call em blind dates Nicky." I giggled softly.

"_I know that G. Girl or guy though?"_

"Guy." I whispered softly. "I'm not going with him though, so don't worry. You're the only guy for me Nicky."

"_Why did your mom tell your cousin about you? I thought you asked her not to tell anyone?"_

"Yeah I did, but she's a backstabbing bitch. If she pisses me off anymore I'm not even gonna bother attending her stupid wedding."

"_Aww Greg, you gotta be there to support your mom and dad though."_

"Do I hafta?" I groaned.

"_Yes G, just ignore her. And if anyone gives you shit, you just point em to me." _He told me, making me feel ten times better already.

I heard him yawning over the phone so I decided to let him go even though I wanted to talk to him some more. "Nicky you should go back to sleep, you're gonna be really tired for work otherwise . . . I love you Nicky, don't get shot at work and don't shoot anybody unless you have to."

"_I won't G." _He laughed. "_I love you too Greg. I'll call yah when I get off shift."_

"Okay . . . bye."

"_Bye." _He replied. I waited for him to hang up first before I snapped my phone shut, setting it down on the side. I lay back against the pillows on my bed, smiling to myself as my heart continued to pound in my chest just from the sound of Nick's voice.

"Greg!" My mother shouted, knocking on the door cutting through my moment of peace and quiet.

"What?" I groaned back.

"Are you still mad at me?"

"Very." I replied. "I don't want to hear an apology if that's what your here for. I told you my biggest secret in confidence and you blab it to everyone!"

"I'm sorry. I didn't think it was that bigger deal and I didn't blab it to everyone honey, only Becca."

"Not that bigger deal?" I almost shrieked at her, clutching handfuls of my hair. "You even got your facts wrong when you blabbed it. I'm not one hundred percent gay, I'm bisexual. I don't fall for people based on gender alone."

"I'm sorry sweetheart, I didn't know."

"Not sorry enough." I mumbled, burying my head between the cushions on my bed. "Becca is the biggest blabber mouth in the family, you basically just set my secret out on a ticking time bomb ready to explode any second!"

"Don't be so dramatic. Becca is like a sister to you. She's not gonna tell anyone." She tried to calm me down. "How about I bake yah some cookies? I'll make your favourite." She suggested trying to buy me off, but it wasn't working this time. _This wasn't a cookie solving solution._

"Mom I have to face all these people in two days! They're all gonna be pointing and looking at me saying 'that's the bride and grooms queer son', out of all the secrets I've told you over the years, this is the one you decide to blab?"

"I didn't mean to. Becca won't tell anyone, I've sworn her to secrecy . . . I'm just proud of you sweetheart."

"I don't want to talk to you right now."

"You'll feel silly about this when everyone is fine around you, because Becca wouldn't do that to you."

"No I won't, because you still betrayed me." I mumbled, trying to hold back my tears. I didn't want to cry over this, but they were threatening to spill any second. "Please go away mom!"

"Okay. I didn't mean to honey. I just wanted you to know I'm proud of you no matter what you do. I love you sweetheart." She finally turned back to the stairs to walk away. I clutched the pillow in front of me wishing it was Nick hugging me. _I can't believe my own mother would betray my confidence like that. That's the last time I trust her!_

* * *

**I managed to get this finished and checked before I went off to bed, since I only gave you a short last chapter I thought you deserved another longer one so I don't keep you hanging for too long :D Thanks for all your reviews. I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

**Please Review**

**~ Holly**


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter Eighteen:**

"Gregory! Stand up straight." My mother scolded me.

"This is straight." I mumbled, folding my arms across my chest as she fiddled with the belt buckle around my waist.

"I think this one goes better with the trousers. You're going to be the only one wearing a belt, how can you lose weight so quick?"

"I didn't lose any weight."

"You did, these trousers fit when you first tried them on back in Vegas." She retorted, going for another belt on the table.

"Maybe they sent the wrong ones over?" I suggested.

"Gregory, I don't appreciate all the cold shoulder crap you've been giving me today."

"You shouldn't have told Becca my secret."

"I already apologised to you honey. What more can I do?"

"Grovel?" I suggested, making her glare at me angrily. She pulled the belt out of my trousers as she tried another one. "Why did you tell her anyway?"

"Gregory, I'm very sorry! Becca won't tell anyone, I swear to you. If she does . . . then you can call me a bitch all you like."

"Can I call you one right now?" I asked.

She looked up at me smiling. "Just the once then." She said softly. I looked at her eyes, trying to prepare myself to say it, but I couldn't say it to her face while she was expecting it. "See, you're too nice honey." She chuckled. "There, I think that one goes and it's barely noticeable." She smiled proudly. "Honey, I'm very sorry. I swear, I'll never betray your confidence again." She pulled me into a bone crushing hug. "Do you forgive me?"

I sighed heavily, wrapping my arms around her too. "I forgive you."

"Thank you darling. Now I must go." She said pulling back. "I've got to go and meet your father for lunch; you'll find yourself something, right?" I nodded watching her grabbing her purse. "And don't just throw that suit anywhere young man. Hang it up neatly." She warned me, shaking her finger at me. "Oh and don't forget it's the rehearsal dinner tonight. I'll need you prompt and ready by 5pm please."

"Okay, I promise." I smiled. She smiled back, pecking me on the cheek then headed off out the front door.

I hung the suit up as neatly as I could, crashing back on my bed upstairs.

I grabbed my phone off the side to see if I had any messages from Nick, but no such luck. He hadn't called me either like he said he would and technically speaking he had been home for three hours. I know this because Sara called to talk to me and she told me when the hunky Texan left work to go and get some sleep. _Maybe he was too tired and he just forgot to call me?_

Instead of drowning in my sorrows I decided to do some CSI work on this so called Mark blind date of mine.

I rummaged around through my mother's draws in her study, finally finding her address book. I flipped through to M first. Unfortunately she wasn't a person who alphabetised her friends by their first name, so I had to check every single page individually. It's amazing how many people she knows under the letter D. It took me nearly an hour to get through the Denton's, Doyle's, Drake's, Dustin's, Davidson's, Detwiler's... and so on. _I swear half of these she just made up so it looks as though she has more friends!_

By lunch time I was just getting past the letter K when my phone started to ring. I blindly reached for it on my bedside table, snapping it open without looking who it was. "Hello?" I sighed heavily.

"_Greg." _I dropped the address book to the floor, completely losing my place.

"Ryan? What the hell do you want?" I asked shocked to be hearing his voice.

"_What you gonna get your boyfriend to beat me up again? He's nowhere near you."_

"How do you know where I am?" I asked beginning to tremble, feeling like one of those blonde victims at the beginning of horror movies, when they answer the phone thinking it's their boyfriend but really it's some psycho killer.

"_You showed me the wedding invitation Greg. Nick didn't come with you did he?"_

"He's coming down for the actual wedding actually." I lied. "He had too much work to do so he couldn't take the whole week off." Ryan laughed from the other end. "What do you want anyway?"

"_I'm outside." _I snapped my phone shut, tossing it aside, feeling a cold tremble running up my spine. _Yep exactly like those damn horror movies, _but I'm not gonna be stupid and go look if he's really out there.

_Shit! Yes I am._

I jumped off the chair I was sat on, carefully peering round into the kitchen at the large doors opening out into the garden.

_He definitely wasn't out there._

I ran towards the doors, checking they were all locked then made my way through towards the front room to check those doors. I crawled across the floor below the line of sight from the windows to check the doors feeling ridiculous. He was probably just messing with me, just to scare me _and it was working!_

"Gregory! What on earth are you doing crawling across the floor?" My mother's voice startled me.

"Me?" I awkwardly looked around at the floor looking up at her. "I-I er . . . I lost a contact lens."

"You don't wear contact lenses."

"Oh yeah." I laughed at myself, climbing to my feet. "What are you doing here anyway?" I asked trying to change the subject so she wouldn't commit me just yet.

"I just got back from lunch, I'm meeting Becca in town for my dress fitting but I forgot my phone." She indicated waving it around. "Why don't you go out or something? You'll go mad stuck in here all day. Don't forget about the rehearsal dinner though, two hours." She warned me.

"Yes, I will...I mean I won't forget." I nodded, trying not to laugh at myself. "I will be there, at 5 sharp, don't worry about me." I kissed her on the cheek, running back to the study to retrieve my thrown cell phone.

I found it under the desk, shoving it back into my pocket.

I don't know why I fell for his stupid trick. He clearly wasn't outside or my mother would have seen him. He was just trying to rattle me and it wasn't working, no sir. "Ah!" I yelped seeing my mother stood in the study doorway.

"You scream like a girl." She chuckled to herself.

"Don't sneak up on people like that! You coulda given me a heart attack."

"You're a little young for heart attacks Gregory." She snickered. "I just came to check on you. You're acting a little strange sweetheart."

"Have yah met me?" I asked sarcastically. "I'm fine mom; you better go before you miss him, I mean her. Becca will be waiting for you."

"I will." She chuckled. "I'll see you later sweetheart, don't forget to dress smartly."

"I always dress smartly." She looked at the ripped jeans and colourful t-shirt I was wearing. "For important events." I corrected. "I'll be there; neat as a new pin I swear." I smiled at her.

She looked at me strangely as she walked out. I'd look at me strangely too. _Why the hell was I so scared of Ryan? He wasn't exactly the scary villain type._

I slumped back into the large leather chair behind the desk, reclining back to a comfier position as I tried to calm myself down. If I was ever going to get rid of Ryan, I'd have to stand up to him myself. Getting Nick to handle him all the time wasn't going to help me out any. Even if he was protecting me, he just made me appear weak.

I jumped again as my phone went off. _You're pathetic Greg. _I scolded myself. I pulled my phone out my pocket to see Nick's name flashing across the screen this time.

"H-Hello?" I choked out.

"_Hey G, it's me. You okay?"_

"Oh yeah, I'm good." I nodded to myself. I wasn't about to let Nick know how pathetic I was. "How are you?"

"_I miss you, but I'm okay. I just told Starla I don't want the baby with her."_

"How'd she take it?"

"_She called me a fuckin' ass hole and she tore up the divorce papers I signed."_

"Bitch." I reclined forwards, resting my elbows on the desk. "So whatcha gonna do now?"

"_I'm gonna get my sister to draw up some divorce papers instead, she told me I'm not legally bound to be this baby's father. She even suggested takin' a paternity test when it's born."_

"Are you sure about your decision though Nicky? What if when you hold your child for the first time, you change your mind? Holding your little baby girl or boy in your hands, feeling their little heart beat, their tiny fingers curled around your thumb? What if you..."

"_My minds made up Greg, so stop tryin' to persuade me. I thought you'd be the one who wanted me not to have this baby."_

"This has nothing to do with me Nicky. This has to do with your child. You said yourself that you always dreamed of being a father. Well with me you can't . . . but Starla and your baby, you have a chance at a somewhat normal life."

"_Are you sayin' you don't wonna be with me?"_

"Of course not..."

"_Then why the fuck are you sayin' all this? You think life with me won't be normal?" _He shouted angrily.

"No, that's not what I meant." I slapped myself in the head, taking a few deep breaths. "All I meant is . . . I just want you to do what's best for you Nicky. I would give anything to be with you. But I don't wonna come between you and your dream of becoming a father." I leant back on the chair, listening to Nick's breathing over the line. I was about to say something else when he suddenly snapped.

"_What do I have to do to prove to you that I want to be with you Greg?"_

"You don't hafta _do _anything Nick. You don't _have_ to prove anything to me at all. I just want you to be happy Nick."

"_I am happy. Aren't you happy with me?"_

"I'm saying everything wrong! Nicky, all I meant is... are you sure you don't want this baby."

"_Do you wonna be with me or not Greg?"_

"Nick! What is with you?"

"_What's with you?" _He retorted.

"It's like you _want_ me to argue with you Nick! I'm just saying about the baby! Do you really want to give up your dream of being a father?" I asked much calmer. "Why are you getting all pissy at me anyway? Did Starla say something else to you? Or was it a tough shift?"

"_I'm sorry." _He softly spoke in a more apologetic tone. "_An hour talkin' with Starla about all this crap's got me wound really tight."_

"You're telling me." I laughed slightly. "Of course I love you and want to be with you Nick. I wouldn't give you up for anything in the world. But if you want your dream to come true of becoming a father. I don't want you to throw this opportunity away. You may never get another chance. I just want you to be happy Nicky."

"_Don't you care about your own happiness Greg?"_

"I care about you more."

"_You're too nice for yah own good G." _He chuckled softly.

"I know, but as long as you're happy . . . I'm happy." I nervously bit my lip, anxiously waiting for his answer. When I didn't get one I got even more anxious. I was about to speak again when my phone beeped for another call waiting. "Hang on Nicky, I got another call."

"_Okay."_

"Hello?" I answered, reclining back on the chair again.

"_Didn't your mother ever teach you it's rude to hang up on people?" _Ryan's voice answered. "_I wasn't finished."_

"What more could you possibly have to say to me?" I huffed, feeling my skin beginning to crawl. "If you're trying to scare me, it's not working."

"_Then why were yah crawling round on yah hands and knees." _I snapped my phone shut again in a panic.

_Shit! _I completely forgot about Nick. _He'll understand._

I scrambled off the chair to duck out of the windows line of sight. If he saw me crawling across the front room floor then he's either in the garden, by the pool or out the front near the garage, but he could have moved by now.

I heard my phone ringing again; snapping it open as I saw it was Nick. "Hi, sorry. I didn't mean to hang up on you."

"_Who was on the other line?"_

"Um... my mom." I lied, sneaking off towards the kitchen, staying low under the counter so no one could see me if they looked in. "So what was your answer."

"_Answer to what?"_

"The baby thing."

"_Greg I just fuckin' told yah I chose you no matter what..."_

"Well you didn't say that word for word." I mumbled sarcastically. "Are you sure you don't want this baby though. Remember I don't have a uterus so there's no chance of fulfilling your parenthood dream with me."

"_Greg I love you. I don't care about kids or any of that crap. I just want you."_

"That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me." I looked round the side of the counter, noticing Ryan climbing over the fence to the pool. _Not very subtle Ryan!_

"Hey Nicky, out of curiosity, if someone's snooping around in someone else's back yard for no entire reason. Do I have the right to defend myself?"

"_Who's in your back yard?"_

"Nosy neighbour." I ducked behind the counter again as Ryan not so subtly walked across the grass to peek through another window. _Why don't I just call the police? God I'm stupid._

"_You do have the right to defend yourself, but why would you need to against a nosy neighbour?"_

"I don't know." I shrugged to myself. "Maybe he looks a little shifty."

"_Greg, you can't fool me. What's goin' on?"_

"Nothing." I lied again. "I gotta go, call you later. Love you."

"_No Greg, don't hang up on..." _I snapped my phone shut quickly, crawling towards the other side of the kitchen to watch Ryan pressing his nose up against the front room window. He pulled his phone out his pocket, calling mine again. I turned my phone off so he couldn't tell where I was, reaching for the house phone off the side counter to call the police.

"_911 what is your emergency?"_

"I have a crazy stalker outside my house."

"_Sir? Are you being serious?"_

"Of course I'm being serious. He's right outside my house and last week he tried to rape me..."

"_Sir, we can fine you for wasting our time."_

"I'm not wasting your time. There's a stalker outside my house and I don't know what he's going to do to me!"

"_Where's this stalker sir?"_

"Outside my house." I repeated starting to get agitated. "Oh do you mean this address?"

"_Yes. Sir are you high?"_

"What? No, I'm not high. I live at 2381 Evergreen Way."

"_Sir, please remain calm."_

"I am calm."

"_Where is the stalker right now?"_

"Outside my house."

"_Where?"_

"How can I explain this to you differently? He's right outside my house, looking in through the window."

"_Sir! I don't appreciate the sarcasm."_

"I'm not being sarcastic. I tell you there's a friggin' crazy stalker outside my house and you assume I'm high."

"_Sir, you need to calm down."_

"I am calm." I ducked behind the counter again as Ryan looked over towards me. "He's right outside the window peering in, where's my backup?"

"_Sir, I'm going to need you to calm down. I've dispatched two units to your house, they should be there momentarily. But you need to remain calm."_ I hung up on her rolling my eyes. _I am calm, don't I sound calm?_

I looked round the side of the counter, looking for Ryan again, but he was suddenly gone.

I grabbed the edge of the counter to pull myself to my feet, looking out the windows around me to find him, but it was as though he had suddenly vanished.

_Shit!_ Where did he go?

"Hello Greg." I looked over my shoulder to see Ryan stood right inside my house.

"What do you want now?" I asked, walking around the counter to put it between us.

"I want you Greg. You think getting your new boyfriend to beat me up is gonna do anything?"

"I'll have you know I just called the cops." I pointed out to him.

"Doesn't give me much time then," He huffed, stuffing his hands on his hips. "I crave you Greg." He said softly, walking round the counter towards me. I started to walk round the other side so there was a gap between us. _I just had to stall him long enough for the cops to arrive_. "Greg the more you resist me, the more it'll hurt."

"Why don't you go find yourself a new screw buddy? You know there's hundreds of guys that want sex out there, but you're here hassling me." I backed up towards the dining table, putting it between us. "Why are you doing this to me? What did I ever do to you?"

"You made me addicted to you. No one else would ever be like you though Greg. I want you." He rasped, stepping up to the other side of the table right in front of me. "I just want to be inside of you Greg."

"No! I'm not having sex with you ever again."

"There's only one way out of this Greg." He suddenly lunged across the table, grabbing me as I tried to run, toppling both our bodies to the ground, where he sat on top of me holding my arms down to the ground with brute force.

As he tried to kiss me I forced my knee up between his legs, smacking it straight into his balls, giving myself the chance to struggle free. I struggled to crawl away again when he grabbed my ankle, stopping me from getting too far. He dragged me back towards him, punching me in the face with his clenched fist.

"Fucking little shit!" He shouted angrily, making sure to pin my legs to the floor this time as he held my arms down.

"Get off." I forced my head into his for a hard head butt, giving me a massive headache, but I did manage to disorientate him momentarily. _Ow! I'm never doing that again._ I winced as I crawled under the table through the chair legs then stumbled to my feet as I made my way towards the back door. I quickly unlocked the door, sliding it open, almost tripping down the steps into the garden from my pounding head.

I pulled my cell phone out my pocket again, turning it on as I ran round the side of the house towards the garage. _Who the hell am I supposed to call? _I asked myself, staring at my phone. _Not like I could call Nick. He'd have to drive four hours to get to me. By then Ryan could have raped, tortured and buried me._

Ryan suddenly appeared out of the side door from the front room, shoving me hard from the side.

I stumbled to the ground, dropping my phone, watching it skip off, landing into the pool.

Ryan smacked me in the mouth again, stopping any attempt I made of escaping his grasp, forcing his body down on top of me. "You really are a lively one Greg." He smiled down at me. "I didn't plan on hurting you . . . much." He smirked, sliding his hand across my crotch.

I went to raise my knee again, but he forced my legs down, pinning my body to the ground with his own. As he leant over me to kiss me I clenched my teeth into his upper lip, causing him to pull back, wincing in pain.

I forced my knee up to his side again shoving him off me.

Ryan smacked his head on the brick work around the pool, rolling off into the water.

I panted heavily, slowing sitting up as I watched his lifeless body floating to the surface of the pool. _Shit! I hate having a big heart. _I crawled to the edge of the pool, reaching out for his body and dragging him to the side.

I dragged him to the flat surface of the brickwork around the pool, leaning down to listen if he was breathing. _Crap! _His chest wasn't moving and I couldn't hear his breathing.

_Last person in the world I wonna save!_

I tilted his head back, pinching his nose together as I prepared to breathe air into his lungs. I unwillingly closed my mouth over his, blowing a large breath into him, followed by another before I started compressions on his chest. I continued to repeat this procedure until he started coughing up water, coming back to life.

"Freeze!" A voice shouted from the house. I looked up to see two police officers coming towards me with their guns raised. "Get away from him!" The same male officer ordered me.

"No wait. He's the stalker." I rushed to explain.

"Yeah." The officer's female partner smirked. "Really looks that way pal. Hand's in the air buddy." She ordered. I rolled my eyes at them, slowly raising my hands over my head as Ryan coughed up the water from his lungs, looking around completely disorientated.

The male officer stepped behind me, cuffing my hands behind my back. _This kinda stuff wouldn't happen to anyone else but me right?_

"If I was the stalker then why would I be saving his life?" I questioned them. "I live here, well not currently; it's my mother's house, see I'm here for her wedding..."

"You have the right to remain silent." He interrupted me.

"But I'm trying to explain something to you here."

"Gr-Greg . . . sh-shut up." Ryan spluttered from the floor.

"You know him?" The female officer asked Ryan.

"He should, he's my fucking stalker!" I shouted at them.

"Watch your language punk!" She warned me, pointing her finger at me. "Are you alright sir?" She asked Ryan.

"Is he okay? He tried to rape me then I saved his freaking life!"

"You shut up!" The male officer ordered me. "You may want to consider your right to remain silent here pal!"

"But you're not listening to me..."

"Tell it to a judge!" He shouted, dragging me off to their police car while the female police officer stayed with Ryan, calling for an ambulance.

"Please please listen to me. My name is Greg Sanders, my mom lives here. I called the cops; she thought I was high..."

"Mr Sanders, you're not helping yourself here." He said, pushing me off towards the car.

"I work for the Las Vegas crime lab, Ryan Clark is my stalker and he's right there by the pool!" I shouted trying to get him to listen. "I'm trying to stop you from making a big mistake here."

"Maybe so pal. But we still need to get you off to the station." He pulled open the back door of the car, but I refused to get in until he listened to me.

"C'mon you can't be that stupid. I really mean no offence by that statement, but why would I save his life if I was stalking him? Wouldn't I run and leave him to die?"

"Mr Sanders, are you on drugs?"

"No!" I shouted frustrated.

"Are you drunk?"

"No! I'm fucking terrified and I tend to over talk when I'm nervous or scared or..."

"Mr Sanders, I'm gonna need you to take a breathalyzer test." He reached into his car, pulling out the device. I rolled my eyes frustrated, blowing a five second breath into the breathalyzer for him.

An ambulance pulled up shortly after to take Ryan off to the hospital. He had a smug look on his face as he was wheeled away into the ambulance. _Bastard! He won't get away with this._

"Okay Mr Sanders, I'm gonna need you to come down the station with us. We'll keep an eye on this Ryan Clark guy just in case you are telling the truth."

"I am!" I shouted angrily at him. He gave me an annoyed look then shoved me into the back of his car, slamming the door shut on me.

_How do I get myself into these messes?_

* * *

**Please Review**

**I Hope you enjoyed this chapter. More on the way :D**


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen:**

"Do I get my one phone call?" I asked as the male Officer taking my fingerprints.

"You watch too much television." He smirked at me.

"No actually, it's my rights. I work with the..."

"Las Vegas Crime Lab! I know Mr Sanders. If I didn't hear you say it the first thirty times you told me, I definitely know it now."

"I never said it thirty..."

"Mr Sanders, please shut up!" He pleaded desperately. "We're already contacting the Las Vegas Crime..."

"No, no, no. You can't do that!" I shouted at him with embarrassment. "Everyone will have a riot with the news that Greg Sanders was arrested. They'll never let me live it down."

"You shoulda thought about that before you broke the law."

"I didn't break the law. I was the one who called the cops. That psycho attacked me, I defended myself, he fell in the pool then I saved him like an idiot. I shoulda just left him to die!"

"Mr Sanders, I'd be careful with what you say around me."

"You already thought I was some crazy druggy or drunk. You haven't believed a word I've said yet."

"I believed you when you said you over talk when you're nervous." He remarked.

"I didn't say nervous though. I said I have a tendency to over talk when I'm in awkward and uncomfortable situations." I corrected him as he pushed me off towards the cells.

"Well try this one Mr Sanders. Get in the cell!" He ordered, pointing to the open cell. I folded my arms across my chest, looking up at him. "Do you want me to get Officer Barlow to help me?" I looked round him at the size of the Officer behind him then shook my head. "Get in the cell then Mr Sanders." He ordered again.

"When do I get my one phone call?"

"Phones out of order." He lied, pushing me back towards the door.

"Sure it is. So what are you calling the Las Vegas Crime Lab on?"

"The phone you scumbags aren't allowed to use. Mr Sanders, please get in the cell."

"Do you have to call the Las Vegas Crime Lab though?"

"We need them to confirm you're identity Mr Sanders, since we can't contact your parents. If what you say is true, you should be out of here in no time." He told me. I was about to speak again when he cut me off. "But not if you keep talking. I swear one more word and I'll hold you over night."

"No you can't do that!"

"I know your rehearsal dinner. Please Mr Sanders, just shut up!" He pleaded, shunning me backwards into the cell. He closed the door on me, locking it then walked off, leaving me alone with all the criminals.

I nervously looked round at them all then took a seat on the edge of the bench, looking down at the floor. I had been to jails before, but never on this side of the bars. _My mom's gonna be so __mad at me! _I promised I wouldn't be late for her rehearsal dinner and at this rate, I'm gonna be here all night and possibly miss her wedding too. _Great! _I moaned.

Luckily I was given a jail cell of my own though, while the others had to share. I gulped hard as a big beefy guy covered in tattoos kept staring at me, while another biker looking guy; all in leather was looking at me in a way that made me very uncomfortable, even more uncomfortable when he started rubbing the front of his jeans, licking his lips in my direction. _Ew! _I shivered with disgust, focusing my eyes on the cell floor.

I shifted to the middle of the bench so they couldn't reach me. They were all a lot bigger than me and a lot more muscular then me too. They could seriously do some damage to my weak fragile frame if they wanted to, especially the way that one of them was cracking his knuckles in his tight fist. I had already been attacked by one guy bigger than me today. I didn't fancy being beaten up by another.

I looked up at the clock on the wall seeing it was already half past four. I had half an hour to get out of here and make the rehearsal dinner on time. But I knew for a fact that Grissom, Sara, Catherine, Warrick or Nick wouldn't be at the lab so the call would go straight through to Ecklie, but he doesn't give a shit about me.

_I was gonna be in here a long time!_

* * *

"Mr Sanders!" A voice shouted, waking me up. I climbed up off the bench to my feet as he opened the cell door. "C'mon, you can take your phone call now."

"Phones working now, huh?"

"Give me sarcasm and I'll take the right away from you."

"You can't take that right away from me. It's my right." He shoved me hard off towards the phone in the hall.

"You got three minutes." He ushered me off down the hall to a phone hung against the wall.

I stared at the phone a moment, trying to think who I could possibly call. Everyone I knew was either sleeping or at a rehearsal dinner. Grissom would probably be pissed off and threaten to fire me. Warrick would find it hilarious and he wouldn't be any help at all. Catherine . . . she might be the better choice, but she's got Lindsay to think about and Sara . . . I don't really want to bother Sara with this. If I did call Sara I'd have to tell her all about Ryan too.

So onto my next choice of Nick. The last person I wanted to bother about this. For one he's going to be pissed that I didn't tell him about Ryan and there's no telling what he'll do to Ryan in return. He'll probably think I'm an idiot too for saving Ryan's life too. But I couldn't just let him die.

"Mr Sanders, you have two minutes left to ring someone so make it snappy!"

"Okay." I punched in Nick's number finally, leaning against the wall as I waited for it to ring. The officer stood at the other end of the hall to make sure I didn't go anywhere, _not that I would anyway. _"C'mon Nicky." I whispered softly as I listened to the constant ring of the phone. "Pick up, pick up, please pick up." I desperately pleaded, hoping it wouldn't go through to his voicemail or he'd reject the call because it's a number he didn't recognise. "C'mon, c'mon."

"_Stokes." _Nick sleepily answered.

"Hi Nicky."

"_Greg, do you know what time it is?" _He sleepily grumbled.

"Yeah I do, I'm sorry but I kinda need your help."

"_With what?" _Nick asked confused as I heard him sitting up in bed.

"I've kinda been arrested."

"_How can you _kinda _be arrested Greg?"_

"There was this little misunderstanding when I called the cops and I've been arrested."

"_Why did you call the cops in the first place?" _I remained silent a moment, thinking how I could possibly tell him. "_Greg, I can't help you if you don't tell me what's goin' on."_

"Ryan." I huffed.

"_Ryan? How did that fuckin' asshole get over there?"_

"I don't know."

"_Did he hurt you?"_

"No."

"_Are you sure? If he so much as laid a finger on you Greg."_

"He's in the hospital."

"_You didn't... you know, did you?"_

"No, I didn't do anything to him. He kinda fell in the pool and almost drowned, but I saved him . . . then they arrested me." I said looking down the hall at the stupid Officer who arrested me.

"_Okay relax G, I'll sort this out. Are you sure he didn't hurt you?"_

"No, I'm okay." I nodded, checking myself over.

"_Greg if that asshole hurt you, don't be protectin' him!"_

"I'm not Nicky . . . I did head butt him though and I have a splitting headache."

"_Aww G, you really shouldn't head butt people, it hurts you just as much as them."_

"I know that now." I chuckled slightly.

"_I'm gettin' yah outta there G. Can't have you in jail for yah moms weddin' can we?" _He chuckled, trying to cheer me up. "_Don't worry about it G."_

"Okay . . . thank you Nicky . . . I love you."

"_I love you too. I'm gonna getcha outta there G. How are they treatin' yah?"_

I looked down that hall at the Officer that had been giving me shit since he arrested me. "Well . . . they thought I was on drugs at first. They've sent my blood to their lab and I had to take a breathalyzer test."

"_Greg I'm gonna getcha outta there I swear. I love you baby." _Nick scrambled off the bed as he hung up. I put the phone down, turning back towards the Officer down the hall.

"You called your girlfriend? Surprised anyone can tolerate you." He smirked, guiding me back down the hall towards my cell, closing the door behind me.

I returned to the hard bench against the wall, folding my arms across my chest as the big biker guy started staring at me again. I leant against the wall behind me, feeling slightly better knowing that Nick would do everything he could to get me out of here; I was just worried about what he'd do to Ryan in return.

* * *

"Mr Sanders." A voice startled me awake again. I looked up to see a man in smart suit with a Detectives badge draped around his neck. "I'm Detective Bryce. Let's talk in the interrogation room." The rude Officer beside him unlocked the cell door, cuffing my wrists together as they led me off towards the interrogation room down another hall.

The rude Officer pushed me down into the chair with a hard shove, cuffing my hands to the table so I couldn't move or get away. The Detective thanked him, waiting for him to get out the room before he took a seat himself. "Mr Sanders..."

"I didn't do anything." I insisted before he even got started.

"I know that Mr Sanders. I wouldn't be a Detective if I didn't know that." He smiled slightly.

"Then why am I handcuffed to a table?" I asked, raising my hands as far as I could off the table.

"Well . . . it seems that I don't have enough evidence Mr Sanders. There's none of your blood at the scene, except on Mr Clark's knuckles. But he's disappeared..."

"Disappeared? I thought they said they were keeping an eye on him?"

"Well they thought he was the victim and you were our suspect."

"Typical." I muttered, rolling my eyes.

"We got your blood test back. You're clean..."

"Told you."

"Okay Mr Sanders, I need you to tell me everything that happened tonight. Start from the beginning."

"Don't I get the choice of a lawyer first?"

"Mr Stokes from the Las Vegas Crime Lab said you'd talk to us without one. Unless you really want one Mr Sanders."

"Nope, I'm good." I smiled at hearing Nick's name.

"Okay, so..."

"So you actually believe me?" I interrupted.

"Might do. I need to hear everything that happened first Mr Sanders."

"Okay, I was in my mom's study looking through her address book for this guy Mark..."

"Why were you looking for this Mark guy?" He interrupted.

"Because my mom set me up on a blind date with him. But I only had his first name. So I wanted to find out as much as I could about him..."

"That defeats the object of a blind date though right?"

"Are you gonna keep interrupting me?" I snapped at him. He shook his head clicking his pen on and off as he started to listen to me again. "So I was looking through the address book when my phone started to ring. It was Ryan. He started talking to me then he said he was right outside my house..."

"Did you actually see him?" The Detective interrupted again.

"No, but I went to look when my mom came home..."

"You said your mom wasn't there."

"Are you gonna let me explain this or not?" I snapped at him.

"Sorry. Explain." He leant back on the chair he was sitting on, listening intently.

"So I went to look out all the windows to see if I could find him. My mom came home because she forgot her phone. She had to get to a dress fitting in town with my cousin Becca. She told me not to be late to the rehearsal dinner either. Which I already am no thanks to your guys..."

"You're already in enough trouble Mr Sanders."

"I haven't done anything!"

"Just continue."

"Then my mom left and my... friend Nick called me to talk about his divorce."

"Nick as in Stokes?" He asked curiously.

"Yeah. He's my _best_ friend. Anyway while we were talking, Ryan called me again. Then I hung up the phone, accidentally hanging up on Nick too."

"What did Ryan say to you to make you hang up?"

"He said he saw me checking the windows. So I ducked out the sight of the windows while I tried to look for him." I explained.

"Where did you see him?"

"Climbing over the fence from the swimming pool so I called the police as he looked in through the front room window and the woman on the line thought I was joking."

"Yes, we have a recording of that phone call." He smirked slightly. "What happened after you hung up on her?"

"Then he suddenly appeared in the kitchen behind me."

"How'd he get in there?"

"There's doors leading out to the garden from the front room, kitchen, dining room and my mom's study. He coulda got in through any of them. I didn't check they were all locked. He told me he craved me and the more I resisted him, the more it would hurt. I backed up towards the dining table so he couldn't reach me. Then he suddenly lunged across the table towards me . . . he grabbed me as I tried to run . . . pinning me to the ground underneath him..."

"That's how you got the bruises on your arms?" He asked. I nodded looking down at the marks on my arms. "What happened next?"

I leant back in my chair, trying to think. "I pushed him off me . . . but he dragged me back as I tried to get away . . . getting these carpet burns." I indicated to my hands and arms. "I got some on my knees too."

"Did he hit you too? You've got a split lip and eyebrow."

"I think so." I nodded, trying to remember. "I head butted him too . . . that's when I managed to get away and run outside . . . I ran round the side of the house towards the garage . . . when he suddenly appeared out the side door again . . . he shoved me to the ground again . . . that's when he hit me again . . . sitting on top of me so I couldn't move."

"You didn't try to defend yourself?"

"I did . . . he's a lot stronger than me in case you didn't notice. Then as he tried to kiss me I bit his lip."

"That's how you got his blood on you?" He asked writing it down.

"Yep then as he pulled back in pain . . . I managed to shove him aside . . . but he hit his head on the brick work and he fell in the swimming pool."

"That's when you pulled him out and tried to resuscitate him?"

"Exactly then your guys arrested me . . . they thought I was on drugs or drunk and they wouldn't listen to me."

"I'm very sorry about that Mr Sanders . . . I believe I have everything I need... a little more than I needed actually. I'll just leave you in here a moment. Shouldn't take too long." He climbed to his feet carrying his files and notes out with him as he head off out the room. "Just sit tight." He smiled, closing the door behind him.

"Like I have a choice." I remarked sarcastically, looking at the cuffs around my wrists, keeping me secure against the table.

I slumped back in the hard chair I was sat on, beginning to feel my wrists pinching from the handcuffs. It was almost 3am now and still no word from my mother. All I knew is that she was definitely going to be pissed. But there was no chance in hell I was going to meet this stupid blind date of mine anymore.

* * *

"Greg, Greg honey." A voice startled me awake. I lifted my head off the table, feeling a cramp in my neck. "Hi sweetie." My mother smiled at me. "The charges have been dropped honey. They arrested Ryan."

"They did?" I yawned, stretching out as much as I could.

"Yep, they just found him thanks to your friend Nick Stokes. Now they're releasing you. Ryan gave up; he gave his statement to the cops. He told them everything. You're free to go now honey."

"Then why am I still handcuffed to a table?" I asked. My mother looked up at the rude Officer by the door, giving him an evil scowl.

"Right away ma'am." He said, quickly pulling his keys from his belt to uncuff my wrists from the table.

"Are you mad at me?" I asked my mother.

"No sweetie." She smiled at me, shaking her head. "But yet again you tried to sabotage one of relationships." She chuckled.

"I didn't try and sabotage..."

"I know honey. I was joking. Just people are going to remember my wedding as the day my son got arrested for the rest of my life though." She chuckled, taking me by the hand as the officer led us back towards the front desk to collect my things. I signed out, collecting my things, giving a wide grin to the cop that was rude to me.

"Do I get an apology before I go?" I asked him.

"Just get outta here before I arrest you for something else." He frowned at me angrily.

"C'mon honey." My mother dragged me by the arm, out towards the car. "Do you need to go to the emergency room?"

"They're just bruises mom. I'll be fine. I just wonna go to sleep."

"They look really bad." She looked at the burns and bruises on my arms then the ones on my face.

"Don't mother me in the police parking lot." I scolded her.

"Sorry honey. I'm parked over here." She pointed. "We've got four hours until the wedding sweetie."

"Then why are you awake?"

"You're more important to me then a wedding sweetie." She smiled, pulling the passenger side door open for me. "You know I could even postpone the wedding..."

"Mom, don't you dare. I'll kill you if you cancel it. I don't want to be the reason you and dad aren't together."

"Okay honey, I won't." I climbed into the car, leaning back against the comfy seat as she closed the door then drove us home. As soon as we got home I kicked my shoes off then climbed into bed, falling right asleep. I wished I could hug Nick while I fell asleep to make me feel safer, but with him still being in Las Vegas, still firmly in his closet, I'd have to deal by myself.

* * *

**Please Review**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter :D**


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter Twenty:**

"Greg! C'mon!" Becca shouted up the stairs again as I continued to scrub my fingers again and again in the sink upstairs with a bar of soap in hand, trying to get the fingerprint ink off, from my brief encounter in jail. But it was no use as it was only making my skin more and more irritated and very itchy. _Ouch!_

I looked up into the mirror at my black eye, split lip and the cut just above my eyebrow. I really didn't want to go to this wedding now, but it was important to my mother. My arms were already killing me from the burns and bruises underneath as the sleeves of my shirt kept brushing up against them, making them even more uncomfortable. I even had some bruises come up on my chest from where Ryan had forced himself on top of me too. I was a complete bruised and battered mess.

"Greg! If you're not down here in the next two minutes . . . we're leaving without you!" Becca threatened from the foot of the stairs.

"Hang on!" I shouted down to her in frustration, fiddling with my bow tie a little more, trying to straighten it up. It didn't look anywhere near as perfect as when Nick tied it back in Vegas, but it would have to do for now since I couldn't be bothered to untie it then retie it again! _Oh I miss Nick. _I started to moan as I made my way off down the stairs, seeing Becca stood in the entrance lobby in her hideous peach bridesmaid dress.

"C'mon sweetie . . . your dates in the car."

"I don't want to meet my stupid blind date." I mumbled to her, shoving my hands deep into my pockets, reluctantly following her out to the cars waiting for us outside.

"Trust me, after hearing that you spent the better part of yesterday in jail cell . . . he didn't want to meet you either." She chuckled, locking the front door up behind me. "C'mon Greg." She pulled me off towards the back of the limo by my arm, pulling open the back door of the car. A tall, slender man climbed out the back of the limo, allowing Becca to step by him. "Greg this is Mark, Mark Greg." She introduced us, smiling as she climbed into the back of the car.

I watched Marks judgemental eyes running over me, feeling as though he was already sizing me up.

Mark had a head of shaggy brown hair, nowhere near as nice as Nick's. I would have suggested a haircut, but judging by the dandruff gathered on his shoulders; he needed a lot more than a haircut.

_Who knows what else is crawling around in that nest of his?_ I cringed.

Marks eyes were little and beady like and his teeth were very gapy and not at all white. _Don't judge a book by its cover Greg! _I scolded myself. Even though he was clearly doing the same to me. _Screw you buddy! I have a boyfriend . . . hopefully! _If Nick's still talking to me when I get back to Vegas that is. He might even be repulsed by me now that Ryan's had his hands on me again. _God I hope not. I don't think I can manage any more heartache!_

I finally climbed into the back on the limo, sitting between Becca's son Liam and her eldest daughter Gloria, so I didn't have to sit anywhere near the man's infestation of hair. I swear I caught him scratching about five times on the journey towards the church and I'm not talking light scratches, he was really digging his nails into the itchy scalp. _Ew!_

We arrived at the church a few minutes later. The driver walked round to open the door for us like royalty, letting us all out. "Greg you can sit next to me." Gloria smiled, taking me by the hand as we climbed out the car. "My dad's not coming so there's a spare seat." She explained. _For a fifteen year old she was very smart. _She managed to pick up on my feelings towards Mark, so Becca had to walk with Mark down the aisle instead, while I had the pleasure of Gloria.

We walked down the aisle to sit in the front row together, where my dad actually smiled at me warmly as he was stood up the front. _Maybe my parents getting married again wouldn't be such a bad thing after all._ I thought to myself.

We all stood up again as the music started up, turning to face my mother as she walked up the aisle in her beautiful dress with a bright wide smile on her face. Seeing the happiness in her eyes gave me more than enough of a reason to accept her marriage to my dad again. _Even though he did leave her for another woman and they spent the better part of my childhood arguing. _I felt like I could almost forgive him for that now since he was once again making her happy.

I almost fell asleep watching the rest wedding. Gloria kept poking me in the side as I did, laughing quietly to herself. I was tired; I had slept a few minutes at a time on the hard bench in my prison cell then another few minutes when I was handcuffed to the table. I had a restless four hours in my bed last night, unable to get to sleep again and now I was forced to sit through an entire wedding, where I was actually falling asleep again.

"Stay awake Greg." Gloria whispered, smiling widely at me. I rolled my eyes at her, watching the rest of the wedding, trying to keep my eyes open long enough to see the end. I never knew weddings were this long . . . and boring. I thought they were just 'I do's' then everybody goes home happy. I barely remember Nick's either; _I must have fallen asleep for that one too. I know I blocked him kissing Starla from my mind. _Just the thought of Nick kissing her made me cringe. _Oh No! What if while I was away he realised how much work I am and he went crawling back to Starla? Maybe that's why he hasn't called me yet. He's too busy with her._

"You may now kiss the bride!" The minister finally said, interrupting my trail of thought. My mom and dad kissed; _the first time I've seen them kiss in years. _Then everyone climbed to their feet, clapping and cheering with excitement for the happy couple. Liam and Gloria pulled me to my feet as I was too sleepy to stand up myself, clapping their hands loudly together, making my ear drums burst and my head start to ache.

"C'mon Greg." Gloria laced her fingers with mine, heading off down the aisle after everyone else. As we exited the church everyone was throwing confetti all over the bride and groom. The little flower girl tossed her remainder flowers all over them too. The strong scents of the flowers started to make my nose itch as though I was going to sneeze.

The wedding bells started ringing again, making my head split open and red hot lava pool in. _I should have never got out of bed. _I grumbled to myself, watching as my parents smiled to each other, heading down to the limo. Before my mom climbed into the car, she tossed the bouquet of flowers over her shoulder. The flowers were heading straight for me! If it wasn't for the fact that I had to sneeze, raising my hands to my face making the flowers rebound off my raised arm, I would have caught it . . . But luckily Gloria was right there to catch it as the bouquet bounced off my arm. _Dodged that bullet! _I thought to myself as I watched everyone laughing.

"Nearly had that one Greg!" Becca chortled, heading down to the car. I rolled my eyes at her looking down at the wide smile on Gloria's face.

"Who would you marry if you could marry anyone in the whole world?" She asked me, lacing her fingers with mine again.

I thought about it a moment; only one name coming to mind. "Nick Stokes."

"Who's he?" She asked, skipping ahead of me towards the car as the confetti flew around her as if she was an angel.

"He's my best friend." I simply replied, climbing back into the car with her to head off to the reception.

* * *

"To the happy couple." Everyone cheered together raising their champagne glasses. Gloria poked me in the side again as I was beginning to drift off to sleep. I groggily raised my glass with them, taking a sip at the same time. Gloria laughed as she pointed at me. I looked down my suit jacket to see I had spilled half of it down me.

"Are you drunk Greg?" She smiled, handing me a napkin.

"Including that sip . . . I only had that sip." I said making her giggle louder. Gloria was a much better date choice than Mark; he was literally scratching his shaggy head of hair through the whole toast. _I'm so glad Gloria switched seats with him._

"Greg dance with me." Gloria climbed to her feet, pulling me up with her. _She may have been the better choice, but she was very demanding._ She dragged me off towards the middle of the dance floor, taking my hands in her own. I was grateful that it was a slow song as I was too tired to move. I just kind of stood there as she moved my arms around, dancing cheerily to the music. I almost crashed into her once as she whirled around in my arms, but I just managed to stabilise myself in time, before I went crashing to the hard wood floor.

"I'll take her from here." Liam smiled, taking his sisters hands to dance with her while I went to sit down again.

"Want some cake Greg?" My dad asked as I slumped down into the chair again.

"Sure okay." I nodded, keeping my head propped up by leaning on my elbow on the table. Any minute now I was going to fall right asleep and I realised it would actually be a lot worse if there was cake in front of me.

"Here you go son." He set down the plate of cake, along with a pint of beer in front of me. "Thanks for coming Greg."

"That's okay . . . Just know that if you . . . you." I pointed my finger up at him. "If you break my mother's heart again . . . I'll . . . and I'll do . . . something I'll really regret . . . but not something that will send me to jail." I retorted, too sleepily to think of something threatening.

"I promise I won't." He chuckled slightly. "Not going back are yah?" He joked.

"Never." I nodded. "I'm happy for you dad."

"Thanks son." He smiled warmly at me. "I better go find yah mother." I nodded, watching him head off through the crowd to find his newly wedded wife.

"Greg, can I get yah some coffee?" Liam asked, leaning on the table in front of me.

"No . . . you can get me a straw though." I suggested, pointing to the beer in front of me. Liam laughed then ran off to talk to one of the waitresses. He returned a few minutes later with a straw in his hands, dropping it down into my drink for me. "Thanks."

"You're welcome. So what's it like to be arrested?"

"I'm never going back for one thing." I said making him laugh.

"You spent a single night in a prison cell and already you're never going back?"

"Damn right . . . and it was more like twelve or so hours." I corrected him, pulling the beer glass closer towards me to take a sip through the straw. Liam sat with me a moment, watching me chugging back the beer and eating the cake set in front of me, trying anything to keep myself awake. "Hey can we go outside?" I asked him as I needed his help to stand up at this point. Liam nodded, helping me to my feet. As he led me through the crowd of guests, they all thought I was already completely smashed, tusking me for the bad influence in front of the youthful boy beside me. I was too sleepy to explain I had only had one beer. I wasn't a light weight, _I was tired!_

Liam sat us down on the pier, hanging our legs out over the edge, overlooking the ocean. I leant against the rail beside me, watching as Liam lit up a cigarette. He offered me one, but I shook my head. "You shouldn't smoke." I pulled the cigarette from his mouth, taking a deep suck of it myself.

"I can't but you can?" He asked with a slight chuckle.

"I never tried one before." I started to choke, flicking the cigarette out into the sea. "Ew." I choked, feeling the taste inside my mouth still. "How can you smoke those things?"

"I been smoking em since I was fourteen." He chuckled, going to light up another one, but I pulled the cigarette from his mouth again. "Ah C'mon Greg, don't be such a spoil sport." He moaned.

"Those things will kill yah one day."

"Haven't killed me yet." He replied, snatching it back from me and lighting it up. "How do you think you're gonna die?" He asked the very strange question.

"Probably from your secondary smoke." I smirked at him, sleepily waving my hand in front of my face to get rid of the smoke. "If I don't get killed on the job . . . then love. I don't think my heart can handle any more heart break."

"Cigarettes help me through my broken heart."

"You're only seventeen!" I retorted. "Broken hearts and bad health are for older folks."

"Like you?" He laughed, getting weakly punched in the arm by me. "I was kidding!" He laughed again.

"I'm only twelve years older than you, punk!" I reminded him. I snatched the cigarette from his hands, taking another puff for myself.

"You taking up smoking now Greg?" He asked.

"Yeah, don't tell my mom." I muttered, coughing out another puff. He laughed shaking his head at me. "Go get me a beer." I directed him, shunning him away.

"Don't fall in while I'm gone." He warned me, before he climbed to his feet, heading back through the party.

I coughed out another puff of the cigarette, looking out at the large empty ocean. That's how my heart felt right now. _A big empty hollow space inside my chest._ After the day I had yesterday I wanted to snuggle up with Nick and have his strong arms wrapped tightly around me. But as long as he was still too afraid to admit who he really was and how he felt, I was going to alone. Fighting my battles for myself. _Or rather getting other people to do it for me as I can't punch someone to save my life. Then I'll be left to pick up the pieces of my broken heart once again._

"Greg! I gotcha beer." Liam suddenly shouted, sitting down beside me. I took a large swig of the beer, handing Liam back his cigarette. "Do you think your boyfriend will come down and see yah?" He asked curiously.

"I doubt it." I mumbled as I sighed heavily.

"My mom's pissed that you and Mark didn't get along."

"She shoulda got someone with more regard to their personal hygiene." I joked, making Liam laugh again. I set down the beer bottle beside me, lying back on the pier to look at the stars in the sky above me.

"Hey Greg, why don't you call your boyfriend?" Liam asked me.

"Because..." I huffed, not able to think of a real answer. "Because he's working for one thing. I'll see him in about..." I looked at my watch, unable to read it as the time was so blurry. "I'll see him in a day's time." I muttered, wishing I could see him sooner.

* * *

"Gregory, lighten up!" My mother chuckled, patting me on the shoulder. "It's a wedding; you're supposed to be happy."

"I am happy." I half smiled, using my elbow on the table as a support to keep my head up straight. I shovelled another mouthful of cake into my mouth, along with another swig of the beer sat in front of me.

"How many of those have you had?" She asked shocked, looking at all of the empty bottles sat on the table in front of me.

"I don't know . . . I've been to the bathroom like eight times in the last hour though." I laughed at myself.

"Maybe you should slow down, honey?" She suggested.

"Right now it's the only thing keeping me awake though. Can I go home now?"

"No sweetheart, why don't you ask one of the girls to dance?"

"I can't dance . . . especially not drunk . . . I could barely dance sober . . . so I highly doubt I can dance drunk and sleepy." I mumbled, giggling to myself. "And they all have dates. And I'm too tired." I added, groggily rubbing my eyes. "And I don't wonna!"

"Dance with me then sweetheart." Before I could protest any further she pulled me to my feet, dragging me off towards the dance floor. "I hate seeing you like this sweetheart, what's the matter?"

"Nothing." I shook my head, holding her hands as we slowly swayed to the music.

"I'm trying to help you sweetheart, but you keep shutting me out."

"I kinda miss Nick . . . well kinda a lot miss him."

"Oh." She smiled softly. "I thought you were still upset over what happened yesterday."

"That too." I nodded. "The beer helps me forget . . . did you know if you drink Heineken and Budweiser together after a cigarette, it almost tastes like..."

"You had cigarette?" She shrieked before I got to finish. I looked at her angry expression then shook my head slightly. "You didn't smoke did you?" I shook my head. "Gregory!"

"Sort of." I slurred, trying to keep my mouth shut.

"Who gave it to you?" I tried to keep my lips clamped shut as I knew the alcohol was going to speak for me. "Gregory! Who gave you the cigarette?" She demanded, taking a step back from me which was a very bad idea as I felt very faint. "Honey, who gave it to you?"

"I...I . . . don't remember." I tried my best to lie, trying even harder to stand up straight.

"Honey, you tell me now or so help me god I will question everybody here!" She demanded.

"Liam." I drunkenly blurted before I could stop myself.

"Liam? Liam gave you the cigarette?" She shrieked.

"Yes. No. No wait . . . I-I didn't says that what you think I says . . . I said Ian." I weakly corrected, feeling the room spinning even more.

"No, you said Liam."

"I'm drunken mom, I slur . . . I says Ian."

She burst out laughing, rolling her eyes at me. "C'mon sweetheart, let's go get you a glass of water." She led me over to one of the spare chairs, flagging down a waitress to bring her a glass of water. My mom sat down beside me, holding my hand in hers as she looked at the handcuff bruises around my wrist. "What am I gonna do with you sweetheart?"

"I'mmm fine." I nodded slightly. "I misssss Nicky though."

"You know I could help move things along with you and Nicky, I talk to him pretty much..."

"No!" I shook my head at her. "Nick and me . . . are going good."

"I wouldn't interfere sweetie. I just want you to be happy. Your almost 30 sweetheart, it's not good to be alone. You've literally proved that tonight." She chuckled slightly, taking the glass of water from the waitress as she returned. "You can't let a little thing like this get you down."

"Little thing?" I huffed, taking the glass from her hands. "He tried to..."

"I know sweetie . . . I meant, you can't let this get between you and Nicky."

"Or I'll end up like Bridget Jones?" I chuckled, taking slow slips of the ice cold water.

"Hardly." She snickered. "You couldn't gain weight if you tried!" She laughed.

"Well like Brisss-get Jonesss . . . my parentsss got married twisssse." I slurred.

"True." She laughed. "Who am I gonna get to look after you huh?"

"I can take care of myssself." I mumbled, holding the glass of water to my head.

"Clearly." She laughed. "Who gave you the cigarette honey?"

"Liam . . . but he didn't give... I took it." I tried my best to explain so he wouldn't get in trouble. "I didn't finish it though . . . I drank more than cigarettes."

"I can see." She laughed at my incoherent babbling then looked over as Becca was calling her. "Oh, that's our ride off to Maui."

"Go . . . I'm fine. No more cigs or beer." I smiled up at her. "I be fine."

"Okay honey. I'll call you in the morning." She pressed a kiss to my forehead before she head off towards her boat, which my father would use to sail them over to Maui for their romantic honeymoon together.

I watched them both waving to everyone goodbye as they began to sail away then stumbled to my feet, heading for the pier to wave them off as they went by. My mom mouthed the words 'I love you' to me as she frantically waved both arms about in my direction. I waved back until they disappeared into the distance, sleepily dropping against the rail in front of me.

As I didn't feel as dizzy anymore I swung my leg over the rail to sit on the top, looking out at the big empty ocean with the stars twinkling in the sky above me and the moon romantically set in the distance, just above the ocean.

It was the perfect romantic view and I had no one to share it with.

"Don't fall in!" A voice called from behind me. I turned round to see a darkened figure walking towards me, just out of sight from the shadows masking their face. It was a voice I recognised, but I couldn't quite see who it was...

* * *

**Who's at the pier? You'll have to review if you want to find out.**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter :D**


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter Twenty One:**

I looked round at the darkened figure as they slowly took a few more steps along the pier towards me, slowly beginning to be illuminated by the twinkle of the moon and stars light above.

"Nicky." I gasped in surprise as his gorgeous face came into the glow of the stars. I swung my legs round off the rail, almost stumbling face first to the floor beneath me, but I managed to grab the rail behind me as I jumped off, just catching myself in time. _It must have looked so funny from Nick's perspective though._

I slowly took a wobbly step forwards towards him, holding my hands out either side of me to balance myself. "Hey Nicky." I smiled again, looking at the concerned frown on his face.

"Hi Greg." He smiled softly, taking a few steps closer to me, so we were just a few feet apart.

"When did you get here?" I asked, trying my best to stand up straight.

"I drove."

"I sssaid when." I smirked at him.

"I just got here. Are you okay?"

"The bruises look worssse than they really, really are... my cousin's daughter tried to hide them with her makeup ssset . . . but she went a little nutsss..." I giggled shaking my head from the dizziness.

"I meant are you okay coz you can barely stand." He chuckled, taking a small step closer to me.

"Are pisssssed at me for not..."

"No." He interrupted me shaking his head, knowing what I meant before I even finished speaking. "I'm more pissed at myself for not comin' with you in the first place Greg." Nick took another step closer so he was right in front of me, looking deep into my eyes. "I could never be pissed at you G."

"Even though I-I didn't... didn't." I stammered, feeling as though I was going to fall right asleep where I stood.

"Even though you didn't tell me." He finished for me. "I wish you had . . . but I don't blame you for not tellin' me G. I couldn't bare the thought of anythin' bad happenin' to yah though." He softly spoke, gently caressing the side of my face with his hand as he looked into my eyes. "Are you drinkin' coz of him . . . or coz of me?"

"I wasn't... drinking." I hiccupped.

"G, you can barely stand." He laughed, shaking his head at me. Nick just managed to catch me as I almost toppled into him, standing me up straight again. "See." He smiled softly. "Are you okay G?"

I nodded, clinging to him to stabilise myself. "Nick . . . I love you."

Nick smiled widely, pulling me into his arms. He held me tightly against his chest just like I wanted him. I softly rested my head on his shoulder, wrapping my arms securely around his waist.

I closed my eyes against his shoulder, breathing in his strong scents as he hugged me intimately, tenderly smoothing his hands up and down my back. "I love you too Greg . . . I couldn't bare it if anythin' bad happened to you. And I can't believe you saved that jerks life after what he did to you. But I get why you did it. You have a heart of gold." He whispered softly, pressing his lips to my cheek. Nick pulled back slightly to look into my eyes. He softly pressed his lips to mine, engaging in a sweet passionate kiss. He ran his fingers softly through my hair as he pulled me closer, deepening his kiss.

Nick slowly broke the heavenly kiss, pulling me tightly into his arms once again. "Have you been smokin' G?" He suddenly asked, licking his lips.

"No." I awkwardly replied, but he could easily tell I was lying. "Maybe." I shrugged as he looked at me.

"Jail for one night and you're already pickin' up bad habits." He snickered, pressing a kiss to my cheek. "I can't let you smoke anymore though G."

"I won't."

"Promise me."

"I promise . . . I won't even remember tomorrow." I giggled softly. "Nicky, when did you get here?" I asked looking up at him.

"I just got here G." He chuckled. "How much did you drink?"

"I didn't drink." I shook my head, resting it against his shoulder again.

"Okay G." He chuckled again, softly smoothing his hands up and down my back, holding me even tighter against him. I could really tell he missed me by the way he was clinging to me. It was nice to be missed by someone that loved me in return. "Did you miss me Greg?"

"Mmm hmm." I nodded, almost falling to sleep in his arms. "Hey when did you get here? You said you weren't coming."

"Things have changed. I'm here for you Greg."

"Really? Where am I?" I asked looking around.

"C'mon we should get you home before yah drop." Nick chuckled, trying to support my weight so I didn't fall over.

"Wait, I want another piece of cake."

"No more cake G, when you drink this much you always throw up." Nick explained to me, pulling my arm over his shoulder to support me back to his truck. He leant me against the side of his truck as he unlocked the door, pulling open the passenger side door.

"Wait." I suddenly gasped. Nick looked at me wide eyed, waiting to hear what I was gonna say. "I love this song!"

"Greg, you can listen to it later okay?" He tried not to laugh. "Right now though, we gotta get you home and off to a toilet before you start throwin' up."

"I'm not gonna throw up." I mumbled, being lifted into the passenger seat in his strong arms.

"Maybe not yet." He straightened me up against the seat, climbing up on the side to pull the belt over my shoulder. "But you might want to in a bit. Just hold it till we getcha home though, okay?"

"Do you know where I live?"

"Luckily I have directions." He smiled at me, buckling the seatbelt around me.

"Who gave you those?" I squinted, looking at the piece of paper in his hands.

"You did Greg." He laughed at me, closing the door. I watched him walk around the front of the truck, heading round to the driver's side door. "Ready to go?" He asked, climbing in.

"Nicky? What you doing here?"

"You're adorable when your drunk Greg." He snickered, reversing his truck back towards the road.

"I thought you were in Vegas though." I muttered, looking out the window. "Where are we?"

"We're headin' home loopy." He chuckled. "Just sit tight. We'll be home soon." I looked over at him, feeling my eyelids falling heavily over my eyes. A few minutes later I felt the car coming to a stop. Nick unbuckled my seatbelt from his side then climbed out the car to help me out. "C'mon G." He lifted me down to the ground, resting me against the side of his truck again as he locked the car up again. "Where's yah keys Greg?"

"Keys?" I asked him confused.

"To the house Greg?" He laughed at me again.

"Oh." I pulled the keys from my pocket, handing them over. "Nicky?"

"Yep, I'm here G." Nick pulled my arm over his shoulder, sweeping me off my feet as he walked up to the front door. He set me down beside the front door, trying to hold me up as he unlocked the door. "What's the alarm number G?" Nick asked as he heard the beeping.

"Um..." I thought about it a moment but I began to space out again.

"Greg, what's the alarm number?" He asked again, shaking me softly to keep me awake.

"I think... it's my . . . birthday," I mumbled. "Year, month . . . day." Nick nodded, punching it in. He hit enter disabling the alarm, just managing to grab me in time as I almost toppled over. "How do you know my birth date?" I asked him.

"Coz I'm a good boyfriend." He smirked, pushing the front door shut then lifting me into his arms again, carrying me off up the stairs to my room. I was amazed he managed to find the way to my room so easily as he had never been here before, but he got the right room perfectly. "You gonna throw up G?"

"No." I shook my head. "Wait . . . wait . . . yes." I nodded. Nick carried me off towards the bathroom, setting me down by the toilet.

"I'll be right back." He shouted, running out the door.

"Nicky." I moaned, feeling my stomach beginning to turn on me.

"I'm comin' G . . . hang on!" Nick shouted back, rushing into the room a few seconds later with a can of 7up in his hands. "It's okay G . . . just let it out . . . you'll feel much better after baby." He softly whispered.

"I wonna go to sleep."

"In a minute baby, you have to let this out first." There's that word again. He really called me baby. Nick softly smoothed his palm up and down my back as I started to throw up everything I had consumed since I started drinking. "It's okay baby." I heard Nick's voice softly whispering as I started to dry heave. "Here go Greg, drink this." Nick popped the can of 7up open, handing it over to me.

I took a few slow sips from the can then held it against my forehead, watching Nick cleaning up. He was always so tidy. "Bet you regret eatin' all that cake now, huh?" He smirked at me.

"I liked it the first time around." I moaned, leaning against the radiator on the wall behind me.

"You wonna brush yah teeth before you go to sleep?" Nick asked me, flushing the toilet as he knelt down beside me.

"I'm tired." Nick smiled, lifting me to my feet. He leant me against the sink, squeezing some toothpaste onto my brush for me.

"Here go, brush yah teeth real quick then you can go to sleep." I handed the can of 7up over to him as I took the toothbrush from his hands to start brushing my teeth as Nick watched me. "Are you still loopy Greg?" I shook my head slightly, looking at the serious expression in his eyes. "I love you Greg."

"I wuv you too." I replied with the toothbrush still in my mouth. Nick smiled widely, taking the toothbrush from me as I rinsed my mouth out.

"C'mon." Nick led me back towards the bedroom, stripping my suit jacket from my shoulders. He carefully lifted me back onto the bed, pulling my shoes off for me. I sleepily fell back against the cushions, feeling my eyelids trying to force themselves shut. Nick fiddled with the belt around my waist, popping my flies open. He lifted me up slightly to pull them off my hips, throwing them to the ground with the other piles of my clothing left on the floor. "You can barely keep your eyes open." He chuckled softly.

"You try sleeping when you're handcuffed to a table . . . or when big biker guys are staring at you like they wonna make you their bitch." I smirked at him with my eyes shut. "I even had to hold it the whole time I was there . . . I was too afraid to go to the bathroom in front of em all."

"I'm sorry you had to go through that G." Nick untied my bowtie then started on my shirt buttons, carefully striping it off my shoulders. I fell back against the cushions again, watching as he undressed himself down to his boxers. He quietly clicked the bedroom door shut, turning off the light then climbed on the bed beside me; carefully lifting the comforter over us both then pulled me tightly into his arms. I rested my head on his warm chest listening to his heartbeat echoing through the soft skin. I felt a soft kiss being pressed to my forehead as I just started to doze off to sleep. "I love you Greg." He gorgeous Texan drawl whispered softly into my ear, circling his strong arms around me.

I relaxed against him, falling right asleep in the security of his strong arms wrapped tightly around me.

* * *

"Good mornin' Sunshine." Nick's warm smile greeted me as I sleepily rubbed my eyes open.

"Morning." Nick softly caressed the side of my face, looking deep into my eyes. "You really drove all the way to the California for me?" I asked him.

"Yep." He nodded with a slight smile. "You still loopy today?"

"Nope." I shook my head smiling widely at him. "I'm glad you're here."

"I didn't want you to be alone after what happened . . . that and I missed you."

"I'm glad you did. I missed you too." Nick advanced closer to me. He licked his lips then closed his mouth over mine, kissing me with a fiery hunger. Nick's hands slid down my sides to rest at my hips, taking a few slow breaths between his deliciously sweet kisses.

"Mmmm." He rasped against my lips. "I love kissin' you."

"I love you kissing me too."

"That works out nicely then." He chuckled. "You want some breakfast?"

I looked round at the time. "It's almost twelve Nicky." I smirked.

"Lunch then." He smiled at me, pressing a kiss to my lips again.

"Okay." I rolled across his body to grab a long sleeved t-shirt from the draw beside my bed, pulling it down over my head.

"Whoa, what are you doin'?" He asked watching me, straighten it over my body. "What are you hidin'?"

"Nothing."

"Greg, I know you." He pulled me back towards him, lifting the shirt off my head. He tossed it aside to look at the bruises on my chest. His eyes immediately ran to the burns and bruises on my arms along with the circular ringed bruises around my wrists from the handcuffs.

He took one of my wrists in his hands, pressing a soft kiss to the bruise. I crashed back against the cushions as he did the same to my other wrist, starting to work butterfly kisses up my arms towards my face. He pressed a warm kiss to my split lip, the bruise on the side of my face then the cut above my eyebrow. I melted under the soft touch of his kisses, looking up into his gorgeous brown eyes.

"It kills me that he hurt you again Greg."

"I'm okay Nicky. You're here now . . . he can't hurt me anymore."

"If it was up to me I'd kill the son of a bitch."

"I wouldn't want you to." I wrapped my arms around him, pulling him down to lay flat against my chest. "I wouldn't want you in jail because of that jerk Nicky."

"If I had just come with you in the first place..."

"No Nicky. This isn't your fault." I held him tightly, lowering his head to my shoulder. "This isn't your fault at all Nicky." I whispered softly, trying to calm him down from his anger before he got himself too worked up.

"But Greg I shoulda..."

"You can't change the past Nicky. If we could then I'd chose to switch myself with you in that coffin in a heartbeat." I interrupted him as he continued to protest.

"No Greg! I wouldn't want you to go through that." He wrapped his arms tighter around me.

"Then don't do this to yourself too Nicky. I'm okay and you're gonna drive me crazy if you keep fretting about this." I smiled softly, looking down into his eyes.

"Sorry."

"Don't be sorry Nicky, haven't you suffered enough? You don't need to take this weight on your shoulders too. I forgive you for not coming with me. I blame Ryan for what happened. None of it was your fault so don't you dare blame yourself."

"Forgot how bossy you are Sanders." He chuckled slightly, pressing a kiss to my lips. "I love you Greg."

"I love you too Nicky. Now you wonna go get some breakfast?"

"You're on. You got a t-shirt I can borrow?"

"Where are you going?" I asked curiously.

"I wonna go get my stuff from my truck and I don't want your neighbours to stare at me, if that's alright with you." He snickered.

"Yep." I grinned, reaching through one of my draws beside the bed. "This one should fit you." I handed him one of my larger plain white t-shirts, climbing off the bed. Nick pulled the t-shirt on over his head, following me off down the stairs. I looked through the fridge for something to eat while Nick went out to his truck to grab his things. "I could make us some pancakes?" I suggested as he walked back in.

"Sounds good." Nick smiled, locking the door behind him again as he set down his bag at the foot of the stairs. He walked through to the kitchen again sitting on the counter behind me, watching me cooking.

"Are you checking me out Nicholas Stokes?" I grinned looking round at him.

"Might be." He smiled wider, licking his lips. "You do have one gorgeous little arse there Sanders."

"Who are you and what have you done with my uptight Texan?" I teased him, turning completely to face him.

"I wasn't really that uptight." He smiled widely, pulling me towards him. "It just doesn't seem to matter that I'm gay anymore."

"That's one improvement. You managed to say you're gay without flinching."

"I did." He smiled proud of himself. "I am gay and I don't care anymore. I wonna be with you Greg. I love you more than anythin' in the world." He ran his fingers through my hair then leant down to join our lips for a deep passionate kiss.

"Pancakes are burnin' G." He pointed as we broke apart. I spun back round to the cooker, quickly taking them off the heat. I flipped the half burnt pancake on a plate before I started to cook up another batch.

"So how much courage did it take yah to walk up to me and kiss me on the pier?" I asked him curiously.

"A lot . . . I think some of your family were watchin'."

"And that didn't bother you?" I asked turning to face him.

Nick chewed on his bottom lip a moment then shook his head. "Not so much. The thing that bothered me more was that you were completely smashed."

"I wasn't completely smashed." I frowned at him, even though it was true.

"You were!" He laughed. "You must have asked me where you were about five times."

"I don't remember that." I looked at him curiously then flipped a pancake onto a plate for him. "What else did I say?"

"Well you were a little loopy. When we tried to leave you wanted more cake . . . Oh, and you wanted to listen to the song that was playin'."

"I definitely don't remember that." I turned the stove off, handing Nick a fork and a plate of pancakes. "I do remember you calling me baby though." I smiled, watching the blush creeping up his neck.

"I did say that." He smiled wider. "You don't like pet names?"

"I do, it's just weird to hear Nick Stokes say baby, especially to me. I thought you weren't the sort for pet names." I teased him.

"I never called Starla a pet name . . . I did call you doll once." He pointed out to me.

"True." I laughed.

"But I've never been in love with anyone before you G. And you are cute as hell so baby suits yah!" He snickered.

"That's okay then . . . I didn't hate it anyway."

"Good." He smiled licking his lips. "Thanks for this buttercup." He winked with a wide smile as he jumped off the counter. _Buttercup? Not so bad. As long as he doesn't call me it in public. _He pecked me on the cheek as he stepped past me then started looking through the cupboards.

"Whatcha looking for?"

"Syrup." He replied, digging through one of the top cupboards.

"That you'd find in the fridge, CSI Stokes." I pulled open the door, handing him the bottle.

"Thanks." He poured a decent amount onto his pancake before he sat down at the breakfast unit to enjoy his breakfast. I sat opposite him, watching his wide smile spread as I kept my eyes on him. "Whatcha starin' at G?"

"You. So... Muffin?" I teased him. "What did you wonna do today?"

"Forget that you called me muffin for starters." He smirked as he looked up at the wide grin on my face.

"What should I call yah then? Tinkle monkey? Sugarplum?" I suggested watching the adorable blush creeping up his neck towards his face.

"You got a games station in this big ol' house of yours?" He asked. I nodded wondering where he was going with this. "Then I want yah to call me Master." He grinned, setting his empty plate in the right compartment of the dishwasher.

"But I only have co-operative player games here." I climbed off the stool, doing the same with my plate.

"That'll have to do." Nick smiled, lacing his hands with mine. "Which way?" I smiled up at him, leading him upstairs to the movie theatre den, complete with games stations of many shapes and sizes, along with stacks of games.

"Pick your poison." I dropped down onto the sofa as Nick set up a game in the X-box, crashing back onto the sofa right beside me. "Conflict: Desert Storm?" I asked him as it started up.

"Yeah." He smiled at me, licking his lips. "Let's see how yah do buttercup." He winked.

"You're on sugarplum!"

* * *

**Please Review.**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Thanks so much for all your lovely reviews on the last few chapters. I'm so glad you're enjoying the story :D**


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter Twenty Two:**

"Say it one more time G." He warned me. I licked my lower lip seductively, looking up into his dark lustful brown eyes focused on me. His smile was so bright and sweet; he could light up a room as soon as he walked in. "Go on G, say it one more time. I dare yah." His manly voice rasped against the nape of my neck.

"CSI Sugarplum!" I said again, giggling as his soft fingertips assaulted my bare tender chest.

"I warned you Greg." He laughed as I begged and pleaded him to stop beneath him. "You better not call me that in front of Warrick."

"I so am!" I laughed righteously, trying to restrain his fingertips from tickly my exposed flesh. "Or maybe you like CSI Tinkle Monkey better . . . but that's a bit of a mouthful." I snickered. Nick sped up his finger motions making me wriggle and squirm beneath him even more. "No, no. Stop it." I pleaded as I giggled hysterically; my cheeks flushing bright red.

"Not until you call me Master Stokes." He declared with a smirk.

"Sugar... plum... Stokes." I breathlessly panted between laughs.

"Master Stokes." He laughed, moving one hand below the waistband of my boxers. "Call me Master or from now on I'm gonna call you Bubba." He threatened, trailing a fingertip across my inner thigh.

"That's not so bad."

"Really Bubba?" _I actually meant his hand running up my shaft. _This was a whole new level of bravery for him.

"How about we exchange the Master for Cuddle Bear or Sweetie Pie . . . or Cowboy?" I cheekily suggested.

"Cowboy's not so bad. Why would you call me cuddle bear though G?" He snickered as I softly moaned.

"Because... you give... great cuddles." I breathlessly panted, looking up at the lust in his eyes as his fingers began to softly trail across my slowly increasing hard on.

I softly moaned again, arching my chest up off the sofa as a wide grin spread across Nick's face. He leant closer to me, covering my mouth with his own for a deep tender kiss as he worked his hand up and down my hard shaft. His soft touch was nothing like I had ever felt before. He wasn't in a rush to get it over with. Each touch was gentle and soothing, pushing me right over the edge.

"You like that don't you baby?" He rasped in a low taunting whisper. All I could do was nod; pulling him closer towards me again to engage in a deep lusty kiss as he completely rocked my world. I moaned against his lips as I completely lost control, releasing my warm seed into his hand within seconds. I felt my entire body shuddering with a feeling of pure ecstasy as Nick continued to consume my mouth.

_I was in heaven!_

Nick pulled back slightly, panting his warm breath across my moist hot lips. I took a moment's breather then reached for the tissue box on the coffee table beside us, handing it over to Nick. He wiped off his hand, tossing the tissues into the bin then kissed me hungrily again, running his hand across my bare chest.

"Mmmm, I love you." He rasped, softly sucking my neck.

"I love you too Nicky." His lips found their way to my, working their way down towards one of the bruises. He delicately pressed his angelic lips to it before he moved onto another. His lips were so soft and his touch so heavenly I fully expected the bruises to be healed once he had finished.

Nick pulled back to look at my bruised and battered body beneath him. "I swear if I ever get my hands on that bastard." He angrily hissed.

"Nicky no, I wouldn't want you to."

"But he hurt you Greg. If I had just..."

"Nick, shut up! It's not your fault. Would you please stop torturing yourself? I told you, you're gonna drive me crazy if you keep on about this. I'd rather just forget about it."

"How can you just forget about it like that Greg?"

"Because." I sighed heavily. "I want to forget about it. When I think about it, it makes me sick to my stomach of what he could have done to me . . . I just want to forget all about it. So please, please just _stop_ talking about it." I desperately pleaded, trying to stop my hands from shaking. "As far as I'm concerned it never happened, okay?" Nick reluctantly nodded, agreeing with my wishes. I could tell he was still thinking about it, but he remained silent, consuming my lips for another kiss.

We made out like teenagers on the couch; kissing, groping and caressing one another's bodies. I could tell Nick was eager to try new experiences with me. He had enjoyed where I had taken him so far; desperately hungry for more of this new and exciting experience.

Nick pulled back, breathlessly panting as his eyes devoured my figure. "So, how did I do anyway? I think I certainly rocked your world." He grinned at me.

I bit my lip a moment looking up into his gorgeous eyes. "A-."

"A-?" He questioned with a curious grin. "Why only an A-?"

"Well I woulda given you a B+, but I was feeling generous." I teased him.

"Is that so? What's with the low grade then?" He asked, lying on the sofa beside me with his leg draped across me.

"You want me to show you an A+?" I asked, cheekily wiggling my eyebrows at him.

Nick bit his lip nervously then nodded slightly. "Go for it." I rolled out from underneath him, pushing him down to lay flat on his back on the sofa. He shivered slightly as I pulled his boxers down past his knees. Looking back into the edgy look in his eyes, I could tell he was still a little uneasy.

"Don't be nervous Nicky. You can trust me." I tried to assure him.

"Okay." He nodded, sucking in a deep breath through his parted lips. "I do trust you Greg." He smiled softly.

"Just relax." I winked at him, pushing my t-shirt he was wearing up his stomach slightly. Nick tried his best to relax, but he wasn't used to being possessed or over powered by someone else; being the alpha male that he is, he probably only ever gave but never received for fear of being over powered. A man like Nick likes to be in control. He was going to find that I was a very dominant bottom though.

I slowly eased him into this new experience by licking my index finger, softly gliding it against the underside of his hard on, causing him to softly moan. Once I was sure that his nerves were beginning to settle I closed my mouth over the end of his hard on, hearing more desperate moan's escaping his lips as I took his hardened member whole into my warm wet mouth.

It wasn't long before he was digging his fingers and toes into the sofa pillows beneath him, moaning my name as he came into my mouth. I eagerly swallowed, licking my lips as I returned to his mouth for a deep kiss so he could taste himself on my tongue.

Nick eagerly sucked my tongue into his mouth, sliding his hands up my sides. As he pulled me closer I could feel the fast pacing of his heartbeat against my chest from his excitement.

"Fuckin' hell." He gasped heavily as I pulled back from his mouth. "That's an A+, huh?" He smiled widely up at me.

"Yep." I grinned at him licking my lips, feeling his body starting to calm beneath me. "You like it?"

"Are you kiddin' me? I fuckin' love it." He laughed, pulling me closer to kiss me. "I love you too."

"I love you too Snuggle Muffin." I giggled, relaxing against his rising and falling chest.

"Again with the name callin'?" He laughed, wrapping his arms around me. "I suppose you did earn the right to call me a pet name. Just not sugar plum."

"You don't like it? I think it's cute." I grinned up at him.

"Well I can't argue with yah coz I think you're cute as hell too." He laughed, pressing a kiss to my forehead. "I could definitely get used to this."

"Which part?"

"Snugglin' up to you on the couch for starters." He smiled down at me, gently brushing his fingers through my hair. "The sex stuff too. It doesn't seem too weird anymore to be intimate with you."

"Good." I smiled softly.

"You've been so patient with me Greg. How did you deal?"

"Because I knew deep down you wanted me. Can you see now why I didn't want sex to be our first activity together?"

"Definitely." He nodded. "But you have been thinkin' about it right?"

"I'm a guy . . . of course I've been thinking about it." I smirked up at him, watching a wide grin spread across his face again as the blush crept into his cheeks. "But you said you wanted to move at a snail's pace when we first got together . . . and I want you to feel completely comfortable with me Nick. I'm in no rush to make you have sex with me; I don't really feel like being possessed again for a while anyway."

"No one's gonna hurtcha again G." He promised me, holding me tightly in his arms. We lay in each other's arms for another few minutes in silence, listening to one another's slow soft breaths. I felt completely at peace in his arms. The trauma of previous events I had suffered through suddenly felt so small and insignificant.

Being in Nick's arms was the greatest feeling in the world and I never wanted him to let me go.

"You asleep hun?" He whispered softly.

"Nope."

"So how big is this place then?" He asked curiously.

"Pretty big . . . you wonna see it?" He nodded so I climbed off him, pulling him to his feet as I jumped up. I pulled his boxers back in place for him then handed him back my t-shirt. He pulled it down over his head, lacing his fingers with mine as I lead him off down the hall. I led him through the guest bedrooms, games room and bathrooms, talking to him as if we were on a safari tour, pointing to all the different things from power showers, vibrating shower heads, pool tables and the most comfortable mattresses; testing them out by crashing our bodies back onto them.

I led him down the last hall, turning to face him. "Wonna see the freakiest room?"

"You have a freaky room in this place?" He asked following me down the hall to a large white door. I smiled round at him then pushed the door open. "Oh!" He gasped looking inside. "You're not into..."

"No." I quickly shook my head, knowing exactly what he was thinking from the look in his eyes. "This is my mom's shrine of me. She never got rid of the crib or anything."

"Huh." He smiled, looking around at all the pictures on the walls. He stopped in front of one of me as a toddler sat on a little rocking horse. "Cute." He smiled round at me.

"She kept all my baby clothes and binky's too." I showed him by opening up one the draws. He laughed as I held up a pair of miniature dungarees.

"Hard to believe you were that small." He laughed softly. I carefully folded them back up, stuffing it back in the draw. He stepped up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist as he looked around the room at the old toys, cots and pictures. "A teeny tiny little Greg used to be in here, huh?" He whispered, pressing a kiss to my neck. He suddenly reached for one of the binky's in the draw stuffing it in my mouth. "Very Cute!" He righteously laughed, hugging me tightly. "Now I really can call you Bubba." He snickered. I frowned round at him only making him laugh harder. "You make an adorable baby G."

I pulled the binky from my mouth, looking round at him. "I recon you'd make a cuter one." I went to stuff it in his mouth, but he ducked out of the way. I held his arm as he struggled out of my reach, managing to tackle him to the ground in the hall. Our bodies crashed together, our fall being cushioned by the carpeted floor beneath us. I stuffed the binky into Nick's mouth while he was down, virtuously laughing myself as I sat on his hips.

Nick pulled the binky from his mouth, laughing heavily. "You're stronger than you look Bubba." He smirked at me.

"Maybe you're just built for comfort instead of strength Nicky?" I teased him, assaulting the tender skin beneath the fabric of my t-shirt he was wearing with my fingertips. He stopped my hands from tickling him, pulling me down to his level to devour my lips for a lusty kiss.

"Mmmm, you taste better and better every time I kiss you." He rasped. "C'mon then . . . you gonna show me downstairs, Bubba."

"You can stop calling me Bubba any minute now." I laughed, climbing to my feet. I reached down for his hands, pulling him to his feet. "Unless you really want me to start calling yah CSI Sugarplum at work?"

"You wouldn't dare." He laughed, following me down the hall towards the staircase.

I led him through to the study, showing him some more pictures and things. I grabbed my hoody I left on the banister as we walked past, pulling it down over my head as I guided him off through to the front room and kitchen. In the dining room I felt cold shivers running up my spine as I remembered having to crawl under the table to get away from Ryan. Nick must have caught on to my anxiety as he was at my side in seconds, holding me in his arms.

"What's outside?" Nick asked, looking towards the back door. He wrapped his hands around my waist from behind me, placing a soft kiss on my neck. "It's okay baby, you're safe." He softly whispered. "What's outside hun?"

"There's a Swimming Pool round the side and a Jacuzzi and the Summer House." I pointed down the end of the garden.

Nick's hand slowly reached for the door handle in front of me. He eased it open revealing the steps down to the garden. I looked down at the steps in front of me feeling a cold tremble running up my spine.

"C'mon G, it's okay. I'm here with you, you're safe." He took my hands in his, slowly leading me down the steps into the garden. "There's nothin' to be afraid of baby."

"I think my phones still in the pool." I suddenly remembered. Nick led me off towards the pool, still holding my hands tightly as I started to anxiously shake. Nick let go of my hand for a moment to look over the edge into the water as I wouldn't go any closer.

My eyes travelled across the brick work around me, remembering how terrified I was with Ryan on top of me. I started sweating and shaking, feeling my heart pounding heavily against the surface of my chest. My vision became disorientated as I had sudden flashes in my mind.

I suddenly found myself in Nick's arms; his hands smoothing up and down my back. "Shh, it's okay Greg. You're okay." He softly soothed me. "C'mon lets go back inside."

Before I knew it I was in his arms on the sofa, resting my head against his chest as he softly soothed me.

"Wh-Why am I sh-shak-shaking?" I shivered, looking up at him.

"It's post traumatic stress baby. You're breathin' and heart rate increased too. I get it when I'm in small spaces." Nick whispered to me. "It's okay, you're safe. No one's gonna hurtcha baby." He tightened his arms around my body, making me feel even safer.

"My arms a-ache." I stuttered.

"That'd be the muscle tension. You sweatin' and feel nauseous too?" I nodded, looking up at him. "They're all symptoms. People . . . places . . . even smells can remind you of your traumatic event . . . makin' you feel as though you're back there." He held me tightly against his chest, softly smoothing his hands up and down my back. "You're okay now baby, he can't hurt you anymore and I'll never let anyone hurt you ever again." He pressed his soft lips to my forehead, delicately running his fingers through my hair. "I love you baby."

Before I knew it I was falling asleep in his arms to the soothing sound of his heartbeat.

* * *

I blinked my eyes open a few times, looking around the dimly lit front room, finding myself alone on the sofa with a blanket thrown over me. I sleepily rubbed my eyes open as I leant up on my elbows to look around the room. I looked over at the other sofa, seeing Nick sat on it with a book in his hands. His eyes were so focused on the riveting book pages in front of him, that he didn't even see me waking up until he turned the page.

"Hi sleepy head." He smiled softly up at me. He set the book down on the coffee table, making his way over to me. "You okay?" He asked, kneeling down beside me.

"Uh huh."

"What?" He asked as I was smiling at him.

"Nothing. I must be dreaming though, I've never seen you reading before."

"I can read Greg!" He laughed, poking me in the stomach.

"I know. I've just never _seen_ you reading before." I smiled widely at him, leaning back against the sofa again. "How long was I asleep?"

Nick looked at the time on his wrist. "About two hours."

"You didn't get bored?"

"No . . . I didn't wonna wake yah." He smiled softly, gently brushing his fingers through my hair. "You sleep okay, baby?" I nodded slightly looking up into his eyes. "You okay now?"

"I'm fine . . . embarrassed."

"Why are you embarrassed?" He asked confused.

"Do you think I'm a total wuss now?"

"Of course not, why would I think that Greg? If that happened to me I'd be curled up in a ball in the corner of the room, never wantin' to go out into the world again. You may not think it Greg . . . but you're stronger than me." He told me, continuing to brush his fingers through my hair. "I wish I even had half the strength you do." He delicately kissed my lips then looked into my eyes. "Are you hungry?"

"What did you have in mind?"

"Well I've rooted through your fridge and it looks like we can have some chicken fajitas?" He suggested.

"And you know how to cook them?" I asked curiously.

"I can cook Greg!" He laughed again. "Do you think I'm completely stupid or somethin'?"

"Absolutely not." I smiled innocently. "I just didn't think you're very domestic."

"Well I am . . . and I'll prove it." Nick climbed to his feet, heading off towards the kitchen. I swept the blanket off me, stumbling to my feet to follow him into the kitchen. I sat down on one of the bar stools to watch him cooking, showing my hands in my hoody pockets to watch him cooking.

"Where's yah choppin' board?" He asked, looking around for it. I pointed to one of the cupboards, watching the gorgeous view as he bent over to get it. "It's purposely placed in the bottom cupboard, huh?" He smirked as he looked round into my lustful eyes.

"Yep, I placed it right there just so I could see the view." I teased him.

"I'll bet you did." He leant across the bar to softly kiss my lips. "Now where's the large fryin' pan?"

I pointed to another cupboard. "Do you want me to help?"

"No, no. You just sit there." Nick retrieved the pan from the cupboard them rummaged around in the fridge for everything he needed. "Where's yah spices?"

"This'll take forever if I let you do it alone." I jumped off the stool to get the spices out for him, placing them down on the counter.

"I can manage. You just sit your sweet lil ass down." He smirked, shunning me out of the kitchen to sit on the stool again. I sat down, leaning on my elbow on the counter as I watched him cooking for me. He looked so professional. All the pepper slices were equal as were the chicken slices. He cleaned up while he was cooking so there wasn't much left to do at the end.

While he left the chicken to marinate he grabbed us some beers from the fridge, sliding mine across the counter towards me. He looked me straight in the eyes as I took a swig of the beer in my hands.

"What?" I asked as his staring got more intense.

"Well I was thinkin' . . . we got about half an hour to spare."

"We do huh?" I cheekily grinned at him. "So what did you have in mind?" Nick blushed slightly as he looked up at me.

"Forget it." He muttered as he retreated back into his closet.

"Sex? You don't have to be embarrassed to ask me Nicky."

"I know." He sighed softly. "You said you didn't wonna be possessed though."

"I can change my mind . . . with a little persuasion." I rasped, wiggling my eyebrows at him. Nick smiled uncomfortably, looking down at his beer. "C'mon." I jumped off the stool, grabbing his hands. "Don't be nervous." I led him off towards the stairs, slowly advancing up them towards my bedroom.

I set my beer down on the side then started kissing him hungrily; sliding my hands beneath the t-shirt he was wearing, sweeping it up off his torso. "Just go at your own pace." I whispered to him, sitting down on the bed to wait for him to get more comfortable.

Nick stood perfectly still a moment as if he was willing himself to touch me. He slowly trailed his fingertips across my inner thigh, up towards my waist. He took the rim of my hoody in his hands, sweeping it up off my head. "I bet you'd look so sexy in my A&M sweatshirt." He chuckled through his nerves.

"I wouldn't fill it out as much as you." I smirked.

"Doesn't matter." He rasped, climbing on top of me to straddle my thighs. He kissed me passionately while his hands explored my body, slowly removing my boxers along with his own. "Are you sure?" He whispered breaking the kiss. I nodded waiting for him to get more comfortable in his role.

He started out slow, caressing my body with his silky smooth hands before he closed his mouth over one of my nipples, softly sucking and nibbling, making me moan with pleasure as it hardened under his moist warm tongue. I arched my chest off the mattress as his hand crept towards my slowly awaking equipment. He butterfly kissed a moist line down my chest as his gentle fingers started to stroke my hard shaft.

My breath started to quicken as his mouth returned to mine, starting to gently grind his hips against mine as his sweet sticky tongue that tasted of Mexican spices licked the roof of my mouth.

"Where's your..." He breathlessly panted across my lips. I pointed to the right draw before he even finished speaking, knowing exactly what he was after.

Nick rummaged through the draw, retrieving a condom and some lube, placing it on the bed beside me. He covered my mouth with his own, kissing me hungrily as he ground his hips against mine once again, gently brushing our equally aroused body parts together.

Nick pulled back a moment again to look at the supplies sat on the bed beside me. This was like locking the door of his closet for him. He looked at the supplies like they were that final lock on the door; trying desperately to make the final movement from his comfort zone.

Nick steadily raised his hand to reach for the lubricant, looking at the tube in his hand as the final step.

"Do you want me to," I asked, closing my hand over the top of the tube. Nick couldn't answer from his pounding heartbeat in his chest and no doubt the angel on his shoulder warning him not to cross this final line.

I took the devils side, plucking the tube from his hand, popping the lid open with a loud click. I rubbed some lube over two of my fingers, parting my legs before him as I steadily slipped the tips of my fingers inside of me, looking up at the dark look of lust in Nick's eyes as he watched the simple act.

Nick's breath became heavier, his body became harder and his envious eyes grew darker. He licked his parted lips as he watched my fingers thrusting in and out of me, _probably wishing he was the one doing the thrusting._ I tried my best to hide my satisfied smile. Never before had I seen someone look at me with such hunger before. And Nick wasn't just anyone; _he was the one I truly wanted to do this to me._

I slowly withdrew my fingers, reaching for the condom packet beside me. I ripped it open with my teeth, watching Nick's lower lip anxiously quiver. _He looked so adorable! _I wanted to capture this moment and remember it for the rest of my life.

_Nick Stokes wants me!_

I gently rolled the condom up his increasing hard shaft. He shivered as my fingers made contact with him, but it was a welcomed response that followed from the strangled moan escaping his lips. _Hold it together Greg. _I had to caution myself, feeling as though I was on the brink of my impending release.

I gently squeezed a little more lube onto my fingers to slick him up. Nick moaned again from the simple act, trying desperately to control himself from bursting on the spot. I fully expected him to burst upon entry, but only time will tell.

"How do you want me?" I seductively whispered, removing my hands from his hardened leaking member.

"How do I-I..." He stammered nervously, looking up into my eyes. He watched my thick lashes seductively flutter across my cheeks, only getting him more worked up. It was so different to see Nick in this light. I had never seen him so horny and vulnerable before.

_It was just too adorable!_

"Like this?" I whispered, raising my knees to give him full access.

Nick uncomfortably shifted his hips, trying to control his body. With a shaky breath he steadily began to line up with me, moaning as the tip of his erection kissed its target. He hesitantly backed off, getting into a better position.

This time he slipped so smoothly inside of me, it was as if he was made to fit me.

Nick stuttered a soft moan as my body welcomed him inside of me. He leaned closer towards me, placing his hands either side of my head as he locked his eyes on mine. I hooked my legs around his back for a comfier position, waiting for him to get comfortable in his role again.

He steadily allowed himself to sink further inside of me. A small smile spread across his lips as I let out a grateful moan. His movements began to gradually gain a little more confidence as he started to rock his hips, thrusting deeper inside of me. His hips began to rock so perfectly, hitting the sweet spot inside of me every time like a true master.

As I had predicted it only took a few more heavenly thrusts before Nick was already losing control of himself, pumping his seed into the tip of the condom inside of me as his body shook like an earthquake against mine, increasing my own pleasure.

He looked almost disappointed as he lost control of himself so quickly. Like a child having to get off a rollercoaster at the end of the ride.

I pulled him closer for a deep smothering kiss, spilling my own seed between us as he continued to rock his hips. Nick moaned against my parted lips as he felt the warmth between us. He slid a warm hand down the side of my body to grip my hip, brushing his fingers down my tender pelvic bone to make me shiver even more with excitement.

My body was blanketed in a tingly warmth as I relaxed back on the bed, feeling Nick slowly withdrawing from me with much protest from both parties.

Nick tossed the condom into the wastebasket then lay down flat on top of me, resting his head in the crock of my neck. I wrapped my arms around him tightly, feeling his pounding heart and heavy breathing against my own.

_It was pure heaven!_

* * *

**A/N: I really hope you enjoyed this chapter. I finally decided to give you a sex scene because of all your lovely reviews and comments on this story. I hope this is worthy enough for you :D I hope you liked the balance of teasing, comforting and emotion between the two in this chapter too.**

**I didn't go to sleep until 4am trying to get this finished for you so I hope you like it lol :D**

**Please Review**


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter Twenty Three:**

I slowly awoke to the charming sight of Nick Stokes; the most beautiful man I've ever seen. He was lying on his stomach right beside me with one of his strong arms draped across my waist. The silky white bed sheets were barely covering his lower half, revealing the delightful curves of his stunningly naked masculine body. I do love a man who takes care of his appearance and Nick was way up there at the top of the list. His body was perfectly formed, strappingly gorgeous and ruggedly handsome at the same time. _Perfect!_

The early morning sunshine was streaming in through the windows across the room, reflecting off his body making his gorgeous golden skin glow. He looked like an angel. I felt like the luckiest man in the world to wake up next to such a beautiful creature. Even luckier that he chose to be with me. Of all the people in the world he could have; he chose to drive for four hours to be with me. _Now that's a miracle right there._

I watched him in awe as he soundly slept beside me. I couldn't help but admire his beautiful sleeping form as his chest rose and fell from his soft tranquil breathing. His silky smooth hair was slightly messed along one side, but it still had perfect form on his head making him look astonishingly beautiful from the dark chocolate brown colour. _I wonder if that's his natural colour._ I couldn't imagine Nick without his hair and I wouldn't want to. His hair really completes the ruggedly handsome look. He hasn't been as adventurous as me over the years with his hairstyles, _I don't think anyone has for that matter,_ but the short cropped hairstyle suited him perfectly. I especially love entwining my fingers through it when we kiss; he does the same with mine and it feels magical.

I ran my eyes across his elegant chin that he always keeps so cleanly shaven, up towards his striking ruby red lips. I love his moist soft lips; it's like touching heaven when he kisses me. He has a smile that lights up a room and eyes that make me feel so special to be worthy of such a divinely beautiful beings gaze.

Nick's eyes always give away his emotion, even when he's trying to hide it on his face. They glow like gems when he's happy, grow smaller and darker when he's angry and they show his lust and hunger when he's kissing or touching me. His eyes perfectly mirror his precious soul.

I love everything about him!

Nick slowly began to stir awake. His eyelids slowly began to flutter open, revealing the soft sparkle of his luscious caramel eyes in the morning light. A warm smile immediately spread across his lips as soon as he saw me staring at him. He blinked his eyes open a few times, yawned widely then smiled looking up at me. "Good Mornin'." His delicious Texan voice rasped.

"Good Morning." I returned, watching as he rubbed his beautiful eyes open. "Sleep well?" _I certainly did for the first time in a long time._

"Perfectly." He rasped as the blush slowly crept its way up his neck to fill his cheeks. He leant up on his elbow, pressing a soft kiss to my lips then stared down into my eyes seductively. "How long have you been awake?"

"Not long." I smiled up at him innocently.

"Did you enjoy your dinner last night?"

"That's not all." I giggled with a cheeky grin on my face.

A wide smile spread across Nick's lips as he inched his body closer to mine. "That was _the_ hottest sex I've ever had." He admitted while the blush filled his cheeks even more.

"Considering how much you've probably had, I'll take that as a compliment." I smirked.

"You should." He laughed softly. He delicately ran his fingertips across my jaw line, looking down into my eyes. His gaze was a look of love, something I had never seen in Nick's eyes before. "I love you Greg."

"I love you too Nicky." He smiled wider, covering my mouth with his for a sweet tender kiss. He slid his warm strong hand down my body to rest at my hip as he deepened his kiss, breaking slowly with a wide smile on his face.

"I would definitely like to wake up next to you everyday G."

"Likewise." I beamed a smile up at him, making him want to kiss me again. I closed my eyes as his tongue caressed mine and his warm hands slid down my body, igniting my lower half to life.

"Wonna fool around before we grab breakfast?" He eagerly rasped against my ear as he softly nibbled on my ear lobe.

"Well what did you have in mind?" I asked; glad that Nick was finally able to touch and be intimate with me, without freaking out.

"Maybe I'll try and earn that A+?" He suggested with a wide smile on his face.

"Are you sure?" I asked surprised. Nick nodded kissing my lips again. He slowly trailed moist kisses down my naked chest towards his destination. I gasped as his tongue scored down the length of my shaft before his mouth completely closed over the end. I thought he'd take a little longer than that to get into his role but his moves were so confident and sure of himself. His moves were that of an expert; not a first timer.

I curled my fingers into fists at my sides, arching my chest up as I struggled to breath from the intense pleasure of the moment. I clamped my eyes shut as my body started to shudder, releasing my seed into Nick's throat within moments. He eagerly swallowed then returned to my lips for a deep loving kiss; his soft lips tasted of me and there was a part of me inside of him. _Nick Stokes really does love me!_

"Mmmm . . . you taste delicious Sanders." He rasped, sliding his tongue across the roof of my mouth. "So how did I do?"

"What's higher than an A+?" I grinned up at him. "Maybe an A star?"

"Really? That good." He asked surprised.

"No . . . much better!" Nick smiled wider, pressing his lips to mine to engage in a passionate kiss again. I slid one hand down his broad back while the other entwined in his hair, allowing Nick to kiss me hungrily, breaking only seconds for brief gasps of breath.

"Mmmm, whaddya wonna do now G?"

"Shower?" I suggested. Nick licked his lips, sliding the silk sheets off our bodies.

"You got sauce all over the sheets from your fajita last night G." Nick chuckled.

"I told you not to let me eat in bed." I smirked.

"Next time I'll listen to yah. C'mon." He pulled me off the bed with him, guiding us off towards the shower. We kissed and hugged in the shower, washing each other's bodies and hair before we finally emerged to dry each other and get dressed.

I head downstairs to see what I could make us for breakfast while Nick checked his phone messages. I forgot to ask if Grissom allowed him some time off or if he just came straight out here to be with me. As much as I wanted him to be with me, I didn't want him to get into trouble at work.

"I got five messages from Starla and two from Griss." Nick told me walking into the kitchen.

"What did Grissom want?"

"He wanted to know where I was. I told him I came down with somethin'." I bit my lip shoving my hands in my pockets. "Relax G; it's not your fault. I came down here of my own free will. I've got some vacation time to use up anyway. So what's for breakfast?"

"We got eggs and bacon?"

"Sounds delicious. Want some coffee?"

"Yep, blue Hawaiian stuffs at the top." I pointed. Nick nodded grabbing two mugs from the cupboard while I started to cook us up some breakfast. "So what did Starla want?"

"I missed her doctor's appointment and she wants to talk about the divorce settlement again."

"I thought she wouldn't let you divorce her because you don't want the baby?" I asked confused.

"Exactly . . . I didn't call her back. I'll let her cool off a bit." Nick set down a coffee for me on the side then wrapped his arms around my waist from behind me while I was cooking. He smoothed his hands down the front of my chest pressing a kiss to my neck. "I haven't felt this good since before the coffin . . . probably even well before that." He chuckled slightly. "I still can't believe we had sex."

"In a bad way?" I self consciously asked.

"No in a good way. I've never had sex with someone I actually love or care about before. And I care about you a lot Greg."

"And to think you were too scared to touch me a few days ago." I laughed as his hand slid down the front of my jeans.

"Do you have any idea what you do to me Sanders? You make me ache in all the right places." He rasped against my neck, slowly sucking on the skin beneath my ear; I was sure it was going to leave a mark, but I didn't care because it was Nick doing it to me. He tilted my head back across his shoulder, joining our lips for a sensual kiss. He slipped his tongue deep into my mouth, drawing the tip of his tongue across mine. He turned me in his arms to face him, lifting me up onto his hips then backed me up towards the counter to sit me on the edge as he continued to kiss me hungrily, entwining his fingers in my hair.

"God I love you so much." He breathlessly panted.

"Even though I burnt yah breakfast?" Nick looked at the crispy burnt bacon then nodded looking into my eyes.

"You wonna go out for breakfast?"

"Where I can't touch you or kiss you?" I pouted.

"We could grab some pancakes from I-HOP then come back here?" Nick suggested.

"Or some scrambled eggs with cheese and bacon?" I subtly suggested.

"Done." Nick lifted me off the counter to the floor, pressing one more kiss to my sore lips. "Go get some shoes on, I'll clean this up." I nodded stepping past him. He is truly the best boyfriend anyone could ever have.

_And he's all mine!_

* * *

Nick ran back out to the car, handing me my breakfast. "There you go. One scrambled eggs with cheese and a side of bacon." He grinned widely at me, pulling his seatbelt on.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome." He smiled, starting the car again to drive back to my mom's house. As we arrived back home he pulled my door open for me, watching me climb out as I continued eating my breakfast. Nick grabbed his off the back seat then followed me into the house, expertly punching the code in to turn the alarm off again then joined me at the breakfast bar.

"Will you still be this intimate with me when we get back to Vegas tonight?" I asked curiously.

"Yes." He nodded. "Just no PDA's."

"I'm cool with that." I smiled over at him.

"Can I still touch and kiss whenever I like?" He asked.

"Definitely."

Nick finished his breakfast then walked round to me, pressing a kiss to my cheek. "What did you wonna do now?"

"Completely up to you. It is our last day alone together."

"Anythin' I want?" He rasped against my neck. I nodded feeling cold tingles running down my spine. "Are you all done with your breakfast?"

"Uh huh." Nick turned me on the stool to face him, looking deep into my eyes.

"Look who's the nervous one now." He chuckled, resting his hands on my shaky knees.

"I'm not nervous." I sheepishly replied. "I'm just . . . a..." Nick put his finger to my lips to silence me, looking into my eyes.

"You're adorable when you're nervous G." He smiled wider, advancing closer to my lips. I closed my eyes as our lips touched, feeling his tongue scouring across my upper lip before he brought our lips together once again. Nick slid his palm up my thigh, lifting me onto his hips then let his hand travel beneath my t-shirt up my spine, making me shiver.

As I opened my eyes again we suddenly emerged in my bedroom. Nick had carried me the whole way up the stairs without me even noticing. He gently lowered me to the bed, fiddling with the belt of my jeans. I raised my hips off the bed to help him remove them, watching them soar through the air. Nick lifted my t-shirt over my head, climbing on top of me as he began to kiss me, letting his mouth drift down to my neck and chest.

I gasped as his tongue scoured down the centre of my chest, licking soft circles around my navel. I sucked in a tight breath as his hand slid across my crotch, making me harden instantly under the touch. Nick pulled his own shirt off, fiddling with the belt of his jeans. I pulled him back down on top of me, sliding his jeans off his legs as our lips and tongues softly met.

My fingers climbed the curves of his back, bringing him forever closer to me as he ground his hips against mine. The feel off his hardened groin against mine was almost too much to take. I felt like I was going to lose control any second then Nick upped the heat by removing our boxers so our aroused naked flesh was grinding against each other with nothing keeping us apart.

His smooth soft hands explored my body as his mouth started to gently suckle on my neck. "Mmmm, you taste so sweet." He rasped against my ear as he softly nibbled on my earlobe. He licked a warm line from my ear to my neck, lightly feathering his fingertips down my chest. "I love the way you look at me." He smiled looking into my eyes.

"You do?"

"Very much." He nodded. "What do you like about me?"

"You shoulda been awake earlier this morning." I beamed a wide grin up at him. "I made a whole testimony to myself of everything I love about you."

"Really?" He smiled, leaning on his elbow beside my head. "Like what?" He asked trailing his fingers down my chest with our legs still entwined together as he thrust his hips towards mine.

"Like your strong biceps." I slid my fingers across the flexed muscle towards his neck. "Your gorgeous hair." I weaved my fingers through his hair then softly pressed my lips to his. "I love your gorgeously kissable lips." I pulled back to look into his eyes. "I love your eyes, they show your emotion even when your face tries to hide it." Nick closed his eyes as I pressed angel kisses to his eyelids. "In the morning sunlight you look like an angel Nicky. You're so beautiful." I smiled, caressing the side of his face as he opened his eyes again.

"Not many people can say that to me and live." Nick chuckled. "For you I'll make an exception since you're so adorable." Nick started sucking on my neck again as he ground his hips against mine. "Do you want to?" Nick asked. He didn't even have to finish as I already knew exactly what he wanted. I reached back towards the nightstand draw, retrieving a condom and some lube, setting them down on the bed. I flipped open the top of the lube when Nick stopped me. "I can do it."

"Are you sure?"

"You have no idea how jealous I was of your fingers yesterday." He smiled softly, coating his fingers in lube. We untangled our legs so Nick could position himself between my thighs, slowly slipping one finger inside of me. I gasped as the lube coated fingertip slid so smoothly inside of me, arching my chest up off the mattress as I watched a satisfied grin spread across Nick's lips. Nick slowly withdrew his finger, adding two this time.

A grateful moan escaped my lips as his fingers slid so smoothly inside of me again. My gasps stuttered from my lips as his fingers thrust in and out of me. I clenched my teeth into my lower lip to keep it from quivering, trying to gain some control over my body. The foreplay had really worked me up and I was ready to spill in a moment's notice.

"Are you ready?" His voice came out in a seductive whisper.

"More than ready." I nodded. Nick withdrew his fingers under much protest, quickly tearing open the condom packet with his teeth. He rolled it up his hardened length then coated himself with lube, lining up with my entrance. I relaxed my body as he slid so perfectly inside of me once again, releasing a strangled moan as he hit the perfect spot first shot.

I rested my legs over Nick's splayed thighs as he got into a steady rhythm of thrusting his hips into mine. He leant far enough over me so our lips could touch, leaning in for a ravenous kiss as he sped up thrusting motions.

His moves were a lot braver and more confident then yesterday.

One of his hands clutched my hip. His breath caught in his throat as he moaned my name. Stuttered moans began to escapes his lips as I wrapped my legs around his back, meeting his thrusts.

My heels dug into his lower back, demanding the more forceful thrusts. Nick complied with the demand, striking my prostate with every pleasurable thrust.

I began to cry out his name in satisfaction, feeling his warm mouth at my neck and collar bone.

As his dark eyes looked into mine I could tell he was ready to pop at any second. The fire of the rising heat was already hot in his veins, causing him to shudder slightly with each thrust. He whimpered against my parted lips as he lost complete control. I wrapped my arms around his strong sweat glistening back, pulling him closer so I could feel the jolts throughout his body as if it were my own. Powered by Nick's quaking body I spilled my warm seed between us, almost screaming his name as I exploded.

He didn't pull out of me immediately.

Nick softly kissed my lips, panting his warm moist breath across them. He smoothed his sweat soaked hair back with one hand, looking down into my eyes. I knew exactly what he was going to say as I was thinking the same thing. "You are so amazin' Greg." He breathlessly panted.

"Likewise cowboy."

* * *

**Please Review. I hope you enjoyed it.**


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter Twenty Four:**

I looked out at the vast Ocean ahead of me. The waves were gently crawling up the beach, leaving a darker patch of sand in its path. As the wind started to pick, despite the lack of clouds in the sky; I could smell the rich salty taste of the ocean. I closed my eyes as the wind brushed against my face, listening to the crashing waves, the seagulls in the sky and the soft laughter of children playing just up the beach. It was so peaceful here. The only place in the world that you can experience something with all five senses without having to do anything.

I was so glad that Nick had decided to come all the way out to Los Angeles to be with me. In record time he had gone from too scared to touch me, to craving every inch of me. I had never been loved before. I've loved other people but no one's ever returned that love to me quite like Nick Stokes. I could tell he really had fallen for me too, the soft glow in his warm chocolate eyes proved that every time he looked at me. He was snatching kisses and snuggling close to me whenever he could. He was slowly but surely getting more and more used to touching me and being intimate with me even though I'm a man. I've always thought he was a tough guy from the job he does, but deep down he does have a soft and gentle teddy bear side to him. _And he's all mine to keep._

I jumped as my new cell phone suddenly started to screech out a high pitched ring. I pulled it out of my pocket, looking at the caller ID seeing it was Nick; even seeing his name written across the screen of my phone made my heart skip a beat. He was probably wondering where I was. I awoke in his arms a few hours ago, shaking and sweating from another horrible nightmare about Ryan. I decided not to wake Nick up as he looked so peaceful and angelic so I just went out for a long walk by myself to clear my head instead.

I snapped my phone open before it could go to voicemail, slowly putting the phone to my ear. "_Greg? Are you okay?"_ I could hear the worry in his voice straight away.

"I'm fine."

"_Where'd you go?" _He asked sounding even more concerned.

"Just a walk." I sighed heavily. "I didn't do it to get away from you, so don't worry."

"_Do you want me to come and get you?"_

I looked out at the big empty ocean before me, stretched so far out it actually looked as though it met the sky in the distance. I was starting to feel a little lonely without Nick around me. Before I was used to being alone, but now I always wanted him around me.

"_Greg?"_

"If you want to . . . can you bring me a sweatshirt?" I suddenly shivered from the brisk wind starting to pick up even more. "Any one will do."

"_Yep no problem, where are yah?"_

"Huntington Beach."

"_You walked all the way down there?" _He asked shocked. "_What time did yah leave?"_

"No, I got a taxi halfway. You know I'm lazy." I chuckled, hearing him laughing too. "You don't have to come and get me if you don't want to Nick, I can grab one back."

"_Nope, I'm on my way and I've got you a sweatshirt. I'll be there as soon as I can."_

"Don't get lost."

"_I won't, I've got the sat nav anyway." _He laughed. "_See you in a minute bubba." _I snapped my phone shut after he hung up, shoving it back in my jeans pocket. _He's really gotta stop calling me Bubba. _I smirked to myself. We'll be back in Vegas in a few hours and he can't call me that around other people. I hope he doesn't completely go off me though; the last two days with him have been heavenly. I was seeing a whole new romantic side to Nick and I never wanted it to end. I knew as soon as we head back to Vegas things were going to get more and more complicated though; what with the work we do, his soon to be ex-wife Starla with the divorce settlement and everything, Oh and the pregnancy issue. Not to mention Nick's conservative parents and family, along with everyone else at the crime lab and the cops we work with too.

_I've never dated someone with such a complex life before! _When it's just the two of us I believe there's hope for our relationship to survive, but once I add all those other people . . . it doesn't look to pretty. _But it's got to get worse before it gets better, right? _I wonder how bad it's going to get though.

I looked out at the ocean again, watching the people walking across the pier in the distance when it all of a sudden started to rain. I hunched my shoulders together as I looked up at the big black cloud over me, wondering where the hell it came from. It wasn't there a second ago and it was freezing cold rain. _Please hurry Nicky. _I shivered on the spot feeling goosebumps crawling up my arms, shoulders and back. _This must be my sure sign from on-high that things are going to get a lot worse for me and Nick before they start to get better._

_Thanks for the insight! _I glared up at the sky seeing the big black cloud was only over the patch of beach I was stood on. He could have been more subtle with his word of warning_. A simple message in a bottle would have worked out better!_

I watched as the other people and families with children rushed up the beach heading back to their cars out of the heavy rain. _There goes a family's day out spoiled because I was looking for a sign from on-high! _The surfers however remained on their boards out in the ocean. The heavy rain fall didn't seem to bother them as they rode out the big waves; watching them out on the waves I started to feel a little envious. I used to love surfing; I haven't done it in years though. I wonder what Nick would look like in surfer gear. I closed my eyes to picture it as the cold droplets of rain poured down my face, feeling as though time had completely stood still as I got lost in another one of my fantasies of my Texan lover. _And that's the first time I've ever thought of that!_

_I actually have a Texan cowboy lover! _I'm living the fantasy right now.

I suddenly felt a warm hand being placed on my shoulder from behind me, almost making me jump. I turned around to look who it was, seeing Nick through the blanket of rain in front of me. I looked at the soft smile forming on his face, down to the t-shirt beneath his jacket as I clung to his perfectly formed abs. _Mmmm, now there's a fantasy I never thought of. Nick in a wet t-shirt!_

Nick brushed my hair aside with his fingertips so he could look into my eyes. "That big intelligent brain of yours and you still stand outside in the freezin' cold rain." He chuckled softly, trailing his fingertips down the side of my face. "What are you thinkin' about G? You looked a million miles away." He asked while he softly caressed my chin.

"All about y-you Nicky." I shivered. "Th-thank you for coming all th-the way d-do-down here to be with me. I love you."

"It's no problem Greg. I love you too. C'mon let's get you back to my truck before you freeze to death."

"Wait, I have to t-t-tell you something . . . I love you more than a-any t-th-thing in the world . . . and I love you more because . . . y-you love me too. N-No one's ever loved me . . . l-li-like yo . . . y-you have Nick." I trembled. "Thank you . . . f-for loving me."

"You're adorable Greg." He softly smiled, pulling me into his arms to warm me up slightly. "Of course I love you. I'm the one who should be thankin' you Greg; you've shown me so much." I could feel Nick's heart pounding in his chest as he got a little closer. "It feels like a lifetime ago that I was too afraid to touch you or be intimate with you, I've never been this happy in my entire life and this is just from two days of bein' alone with you." He sweetly smiled. "I love you with all my heart Greg . . . nothin's gonna change when we hit Vegas. I promise you."

I dreamily gazed into his eyes a moment then cracked into a wide grin. "I wish I'd g-gotten that on tape."

"I'll record it in your next birthday card." He joked making me laugh. "C'mon you're freezin'." Nick bravely laced his fingers with mine in public, leading me off towards his truck by my hand. I had never once held hands in public with a boyfriend or a girlfriend for that matter, so for Nick to be holding my hand out here in the open was a magical, making me feel special; even if there was barely anyone around and visibility was very poor from the blanket of rain pouring down all around us. _It's the thought that counts and the meaning behind the hand holding._

_Nick's loves me! _And I wanted to shout it from the rooftops for all to hear; o_bviously not really though, _hypothetically speaking. Nick wasn't ready to come out and I completely respect that.

Nick led me back to his truck in the parking lot, helping me into the passenger seat. He closed the door then disappeared round the back of his truck, returning with a towel. _He's always so prepared for every and any occasion!_ He climbed into the driver's seat, handing me the towel then cranked up the heat to keep us warm.

Nick lifted my soaked t-shirt up over my head, tossing into the back while he helped dry me off as I was still shivering. "What's up Greg?"

"Nothing." I said as my teeth chattered together.

"C'mon G, I know you." Nick gently rubbed the towel through my hair then grabbed his A&M sweatshirt; _the prized possession of the former jock and he's handing it to me. _He once told Warrick that he would never ever (in a million years ever) let one of the women he slept with wear it, let alone his wife. _He really must care about me, because as I understand it _'to give away your game sweatshirt is a sin against the team.' His former team mates would be tossing and turning in their beds if they knew he had just given his away to me.

Nick pulled the prized sweatshirt down over my head as I put my arms through the sleeves, watching as he swept the hood off my head to look into my eyes. "Mmm, I told you you'd look sexy as hell in this." He winked at me as I softly ran my fingers through my tousled wet hair making it all spike up then got comfy against the seat as the heaters started to kick in. "Was it another nightmare?" He whispered softly as though it was a secret. Nick tilted his head to the side as he got a little closer to me, looking into my eyes. He waited patiently for me to speak with his baited breath and parted lips. "You don't have to tell me the details Greg." I remained silent as I looked at his lips, mere millimetres apart from mine.

Nick panted a warm breath across my lips the started to tenderly kiss me. I closed my eyes as his warm hand cupped the side of my face, deepening his pleasurable kiss; _warming me right up._

"You know we're kinda in a public place." I smiled as he pulled back from me slightly.

"No one's out there though." Nick smiled back, pulling me closer against his chest across the gear shaft. "You're freezin'." He whispered, gently rubbing his hands up and down my back.

"Better take me home and warm me up." I grinned up at him as I trembled in his arms.

Nick pressed his moist warm lips to my forehead then pulled my seatbelt down over my shoulder for me. He pulled his own belt on then started driving us home back to my mom's house.

"Are you gonna tell me what this dream was now?" He asked curiously as we got half way there.

"I don't wonna talk about it." _And I really didn't._ I dreamt that I woke up beside Ryan and he was doing things to me that made my insides tear apart. I really didn't want to share that with Nick, especially not this early into our relationship; just thinking about it made me shiver and it wasn't from the cold.

Once we got home Nick held my hand again as we walked up the stairs together, helping me out of my wet clothes then got me some fresh boxers and a t-shirt to crawl back under the covers with him. I watched Nick getting undressed himself down to his boxers, before he climbed under the warm covers with me, spooning me tightly.

"Warm enough?" He whispered against my ear as he ran his warm hands under my t-shirt to caress my body. I nodded, leaning back into his embrace. "Are you goin' back on the plane or you wonna drive with me tonight?"

"I can go with you . . . if you can tolerate me for a four hour drive?"

"I'd be lonely without you." He admitted, entwining our legs together, softly kissing me on the neck. "I don't know about you, but I can't wait to begin the next chapter of our lives together." He rasped against the nape of my neck with his warm lips, making the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end.

"Me either, I've got so much more to teach you too."

"Like where you get waxed?" He smirked. "I've never seen a man with no body hair before."

"That's for the sex appeal." I smiled round at him. "I'm a twink."

"A twink?" He questioned me as though I made it up.

"You gotta learn the lingo man." I teased him. "Twink's are usually more slender built guys with a youthful appearance and with little or no body hair . . . like me."

"So when you say sex appeal?" He curiously queried.

"I mean for other men."

He raised his eyebrows as he looked into my eyes. "You trim all of your body hair for other men?"

"Women get tans, do their nails and go to hair saloons if they want to impress someone." I smiled at him again, he was so new to this it was cute. "Some guys like the younger hairless man look . . . I'm damaged goods, it's not easy to get dates when you look like a monster."

"You're not a monster Greg. You're beautiful."

I smiled softly, looking up into his creamy chocolate eyes. "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." I whispered back to him. He looked into my eyes, gently brushing his fingers through my tousled hair.

"True . . . you are beautiful though. You're scars are a part of you and they're beautiful too."

"Going for the extra sappy romance vibe today, huh?" I joked through the awkwardness.

"Well I think it's because we had such a great day yesterday and the day before . . . along with some hot sex it makes me extra sappy." He smiled at me lovingly. "So you trim all your body hair to impress guys, how?"

"Clubbing Nicky. And no I don't strip down to show them." I laughed. "I've only ever slept with three guys before you though . . . I never loved any of them, not really. I don't give it up so easy. Most of the guys that go to those clubs can't remember how many guys they slept with in the last week. The whole club scene is really just for hooking up . . . I'm not that easy though."

"But you still went clubbin'?"

"For the music, drinks and dancing man, you should know by now I'm a little wild." I smiled innocently, conveniently forgetting to add the drugs part of the lifestyle I once had. "I used to go all the time when I was a lab rat. But back then I used to spend more time in the back rooms where the real action happens..."

"Okay . . . this is another one of those conversations I thought I'd never have with you." He chuckled softly. "You're not gonna still want to do that though right?"

"The clubbing part? No way, there's really no point unless you're looking for sex. But I've got a boyfriend now."

"That's right G, and he's the jealous type." He warned me. "I won't be too happy if I catch you flirtin' with another guy behind my back or spendin' time in one of these backrooms."

"Haven't been to one in years. And I wouldn't do that to you, I'm very loyal."

"You implyin' I'm not?"

"No." I smiled slightly. "You weren't exactly loyal to Starla."

"Yeah . . . but I wasn't in love with Starla. I'm in love with you though . . . I wouldn't do anythin' to break your heart." He promised me, possessively wrapping his arms tighter around me. "I'm yours now G."

I relaxed in his arms enjoying the soft caress across my chest and the tender kisses to my neck. "Do you like the no body hair look then?"

"Well . . . you do look sexy as hell." He agreed, lifting the waist band of my boxers with his thumb to take another look. "Very sexy indeed." He rasped against my ear.

"I'll do it only for you now then."

Nick tightened his grip around me, pressing another kiss to my neck. "We should get some sleep."

"Did you set an alarm? I don't want you to be late for work tomorrow."

"Yeah, I set my watch. We'll have plenty of time to drive back and shower and all that before I head in for my next shift."

"Did you already pack our stuff?" I asked looking around the room. The room looked cleaner and our suitcases were neatly stacked against the wall.

"Yep, I did it while you were sleepin' last night."

"You're so organised and efficient." I chuckled.

"Get used to it G, I used to drive Starla crazy with my OCD." He smirked.

I turned my head to kiss him softly on the chin. "It won't bother me . . . I'm crazy _about_ you."

"Good, the feelin's mutual." His gorgeous lips spread into a wide smile. "C'mon then Bubba, enough sappy talk now . . . sleepy time."

"I'm not a baby." I pouted up at him.

"Oh yes you are, you're my baby, and an adorable one at that." He chuckled, pressing one last kiss to my lips. "Good night G."

"Night Nicky." I closed my eyes, relaxing in his warm embrace. I felt safer with his arms around me already. Maybe my fears of things getting worse before they better were just in my head? _I hope so. _I don't know if I could handle the heartache.

* * *

A few hours later we were abruptly awoken by Nick's alarm. Nick being the morning person out of the two of us reached to turn it off then started to dispense soft kisses to my face trying to wake me up. _Little did he know that I was awake I just kept my eyes shut to enjoy the kisses for a little longer._ "Greg . . . C'mon, wake up bubba." Nick tickled and kissed me until I finally opened my eyes, greeted with the Texans warm smile. "Mornin' sleepy head. C'mon you gotta get up if we wonna get back to Vegas on time."

"Just five more minutes." I mumbled, closing my eyes again as I snuggled closer to him. Nick managed to loosen my grip around his waist, climbing over me to get off the bed. He slid his hands under my armpits, lifting me right out of bed, completely surprising me. He stabilised me as I wobbled sleepily, rubbing my eyes open as I readjusted to the standing position I was now in. "How did you do that?"

"I work out." He winked at me, flexing his muscles. "And you're not that heavy G . . . C'mon get dressed; we'll grab somethin' to eat on the way back." Nick quickly got dressed then started cleaning tidying the bed, while I was still weakly struggling to get my jeans on.

Nick finished with the bed then pulled my jeans up for me, tightening the belt around my waist for me. He stopped me before I put my t-shirt on back to front, turning it the right way for me, chuckling softly. "What would yah do without me G?" He smirked, cupping my face in his hands for a passionate kiss. "C'mon Bubba, let's go."

"What's your hurry? You said we have plenty of time." I mumbled sleepily.

"We do, but I wonna be able to grab somethin' to eat and shower before I head into work." He smiled at me then grabbed his bag. "C'mon G, get your cute lil ass down stairs." He instructed heading down them first.

I reluctantly grabbed my bag from the floor, following after him down the staircase. Nick turned to face me before he went out the door, lifting me up over our bags stood between us into his arms. He hugged me tightly then started kissing me hungrily, gently smoothing his hands up and down my back.

"What was that for?" I panted as we broke apart.

"Just in case . . . I probably won't get the chance to for another four hours and I have to leave for work shortly after we get back . . . And as if I need a reason to kiss you, baby?" I shook my head, dreamily looking into his eyes. "I love it when you're sleepy G, you're so adorable."

"Aren't I always?" I beamed a smiled at him, making his smile increase.

"Of course you are." He pressed a kiss to my forehead then grabbed his bag, heading off out the front door. "C'mon G, chop, chop!" I licked my lips to savour the taste of him then followed him out the door, locking it behind me. I met Nick round the back of the truck where he lifted my bag in the back for me as my arms were still too sleepy. "Well it doesn't look like you'll be talkin' my ears off this journey." He chuckled.

"Why's that?" I asked, leaning against the side of the truck while the perfectionist arranged the bags so they wouldn't bang or knock against the back of the door while he was driving.

"Because you can barely keep your eyes open G." He smirked. "C'mon Bubba." He led me round to the front of the truck, pulling my door open for me. I climbed in then watched as he stepped up on the side to pull my belt on for me then looked into my eyes. "Hey G, technically we missed Valentine's Day..."

"Not really, we spent it having blow jobs, our first sex and you made dinner for me." I corrected him with a wide smile.

"True, but I never asked you... would you be my valentine G?"

"If that's how you always celebrate Valentine's Day . . . then definitely." I smiled widely at him.

"Good." He leant in to snatch a kiss before he ran round to the driver's side door to drive us back home to Vegas.

"I should call my mom, she's been so worried since that thing with... you know who. Is it okay if I tell her about us?" I asked pulling out my phone as we got halfway there.

"Um... yeah I guess. As long as she promises not to tell anyone else, you don't wonna tell people in Vegas do you?"

I shook my head, winding up the window beside me so my mom could hear me. "No, we don't have to . . . it can just be our little secret." I assured him with a sweet smile.

"I hope you don't think I'm ashamed of you though Greg."

"I don't... I know why you wonna keep us on the down low and I'm cool with it." I started dialling my mom's mobile number, hoping she'd pick up. "However this thing with Starla and the baby works out for you . . . I just want you to know . . . I'm here for you, no matter what." I comforted him.

"Thanks Greg . . . that means a lot to me."

"I just can't be there for you for the birth though." I warned him with a laugh. "I once had to take my cousin Becca to hospital, we got stuck in a traffic jam and she was cursing and swearing at me the whole way. She started crowning on my back seat . . . it was worse than watching one of the Doc's autopsy's." Nick laughed shaking his head at me. "What? It was."

"Okay Greg, I won't make you do that then. I'm sure you'll have very little to do with Starlas pregnancy, even though you went to the first doctor's appointment with her. It's kinda like I have a double life . . . the one with you I definitely want to be a part of . . . but the one with Starla, I can't wait to leave that behind to be with you."

I smiled at him, feeling my heart skipping a beat again. "Damn, I wish I'd gotten that on tape too."

"Ha, I'll record that in the card for yah too." He laughed.

"You're gonna need a lot of tape." I smirked, trying to dial the boat phone as my mom didn't pick up her cell.

"Yeah, but you're worth it G."

* * *

**A very sappy chapter I know. But I thought it would be for the best before all the drama of worlds colliding.**

**Please Review if you liked it :D**


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter Twenty Five:**

"G wake up! Greg! Greg!" I snapped my eyes open looking round at Nick stood outside the parked truck. "We're home. C'mon bud, you can sleep upstairs." Nick ushered me out as he pulled the bags out the back.

I looked around at the parking lot then yawned widely. "I fell asleep?"

"Yeah, about an hour ago. You were completely out." He chuckled, closing up the back of his truck. "C'mon G, out."

"I'm coming." I moaned, sleepily rubbing my eyes open as I took the giant leap down from his truck. "What's the rush?" I asked, leaning against the side of his truck as I struggled to wake myself up.

"People could be watchin'." He stated, sounding completely paranoid. "Did you sleep well, sleepy head?" He asked, pulling his bag over his shoulder. I shrugged grabbing my bag from the floor beside him. "Did you have another nightmare?" I shrugged again then looked up at the wide eyed expression on Nick's face. I looked in the same direction he was, seeing an angry pregnant Starla coming towards us.

_Uh oh!_

"Where the hell have you been Nick?" Starla shouted as she waddled over.

I watched as the blood completely drained from Nick's face, deciding to step in to speak for the speechless broken man behind me. His biggest fear was that Starla would find out about us and here she was. "Well Nick just picked me up from the airport..."

"Was I talking to you, yah little dweeb!" She shouted at me.

"Hey, don't shout at Greg!" Nick defended me. "I was just pickin' him up from the airport like he said."

"I'm not little." I moaned at her.

"Greg's just got back from LA." Nick explained.

"I don't care about Greg! I mean the doctor's appointment you missed!" She shouted angrily, folding her arms over her increasingly huge stomach. "I shoulda known better, I mean you were a lousy husband too."

"I got busy at work is all." Nick simply stated.

They were about to argue again but both of their eyes turned to me as if I was an unwanted third party to their bickering.

_Quick, make up an excuse and get out of there! _"Oh, I should... I should go." I grabbed my bag and Nick's from his hands so she thought it was mine, heading off for the front door as I retrieved my keys from my pocket.

"Yes you should." Starla barked after me.

"Goodbye Scarla, nice to see you again." I remarked sarcastically, just to piss her off even more.

"It's Star-la!" She yelled making Nick snicker.

"I. Don't. Care." I stated back walking off into the apartment complex without Nick at my side.

I hope this thing with Starla doesn't make Nick stay ten feet away from me at all times. _I just __got him. I can't lose him now._

I rode the elevator up alone, feeling my skin still crawling from the dream that haunted my mind. I wished they would stop already. I was so sick of these restless nights. I didn't want to be tormented by him in my dreams still. This time as Ryan fell in the pool I went to check if he was okay when he suddenly pulled me in, holding my head under so I couldn't breathe.

I shivered at the memory again.

I looked up as the lift opened up to the eighth floor, looking down the hall at my apartment door. There was an envelope stuck to it just beneath the spy hole. I raised my keys to the lock, pulling the envelope off as I unlocked the door.

_A love letter to Nick. Great!_

As the letter wasn't sealed I decided to take a peek. _Just to check he wasn't cheating on me already, of course. _I dropped my bag on the floor as I made my way towards the couch, pulling the letter from the envelope. It was written on a light pink piece of paper with little hearts in each corner, reading:

'_Dear Nick,_

_It is very important for me to express to you how much you really mean to me. I wish I could do this in person while holding you in my arms and gazing into your eyes. But since we are physically separated by miles of emptiness, this expression must come in the form of letters such as this.'_

What? _Separated miles apart? _Who did he tell that he was going to Los Angeles? I decided to continue reading even though my heart was aching already at the thought of Nick cheating on me.

'_I know it is difficult for you Nick, as it is for me, to be separated for so long. Life seems to be full of trials like this that test our inner strength and more importantly, our devotion and love for one another._

_What I'm trying to say Nicky is that I love you. I can't forget about you Nick. I wish you didn't have to make it so difficult for the both of us. I wish I didn't love you._

_I just wish we could work things out._

_Yours truly_

_~ Cathleen ~_

All I could think of was, _what a bitch! Nicky's mine! What should I do? _I pondered looking around the apartment. _I could hide it and never let him see it? Or I could play the immediate jealous boyfriend that I am and confront him about it._

I decided to hide it. _Cowards route!_

I shoved it back in the envelope then stuffed it under the sofa. _I'd have to do some CSI work to find out who this Cathleen is._

I crashed back on the sofa, stretching my legs out to get comfy. Starla must be giving Nick an earful downstairs. They can never talk for this long, only argue.

I closed my eyes as I relaxed back against the cushions, so glad to be back home, _finally!_ I hoped things with Nick wouldn't change too much now that we were back. He seemed okay in the car, _but I guess I'll find out soon enough._

A few minutes later I felt a soft butterfly kiss to my forehead. "C'mon Greg, the bed would be comfier." Nick's voice rasped as he pulled my arm over his shoulder, lifting me up into his strong arms. A few seconds later I felt myself being lowered to my bed. Nick pulled my sneakers off, softly running his fingers through my tousled hair. "Good night sleepin' beauty." He whispered, pressing a kiss to the side of my face.

_At least he still loves me!_

* * *

I woke up a few hours later, softly rubbing my eyes open. I stretched my arms out, turning to face the warm body beside me. Nick was lying on his back, with a book in his hands. "Hi there, sleepy head." He smiled softly as he saw me awake. He snapped the book in his hands shut, placing it on the bed beside him as he rolled to face me. "Did yah sleep well Bubba?"

"Not bad . . . how did I get here?" I asked looking around the room.

"I carried you." He pressed a soft kiss to my cheek as his hand drifted down my chest. "You know we are goin' to have to talk about these dreams of yours eventually G."

"Isn't that a job for a psychiatrist?" I joked.

"Yeah, but psychiatrist's don't watch you sleep. I do and it scares me. You toss and turn all night then you start sweatin' and shakin' . . . what's goin' on in that head of yours baby?" He asked, trailing his fingertips across my forehead as he looked into my eyes.

"It's nothing . . . probably just that post traumatic stress thing you were talking about."

"You wonna talk about it G?" I shook my head. "No . . . well I'm always here if you need me." His hand drifted further down my body.

"Here I thought you'd be too afraid to touch me once we hit Vegas." I chuckled.

"Not quite." He smiled, slipping his other hand down my side to grip my hip. "I still wonna be with you . . . and you are irresistible." He seductively rasped.

"I noticed." I grinned widely. Nick captured my lips for a passionate kiss, swirling his tongue around in my mouth. I closed my eyes as he softly sucked on my lower lip, sliding his palm across my chest again. "When do you have to go to work?" I asked.

Nick looked up at the clock. "Less than an hour . . . do you want to? I mean it has nearly been eleven hours?"

"You've been counting?" I laughed.

"I love the feel of being inside of you Greg; I've never felt closer to anyone in my entire life." He admitted. "I think I'm addicted to you, I keep cravin' you."

"It's the honeymoon phase." I smiled up at him. "Something new and exciting gets your adrenaline pumping for me."

"Gets the blood flowin' too." He smirked, sliding his hand across my crotch.

"Well we could..." I reached over for my side draw, disappointed as I didn't have any condoms left. "But we don't have any condoms in here; you got some in your stash." I turned to look round at Nick, watching as he pulled a condom out of his jeans pocket along with a small tube of lubricant. "Always come prepared, huh?" I laughed, looking at the lust in his eyes.

"We don't have to . . . if you're too tired."

I looked round at the time then back at Nick. "Well I've gotta do something to keep me awake. I have to switch my sleeping schedule again."

"I know. I hate doing that." He groaned.

I lifted my t-shirt off my head, tossing it over the side of the bed. "Well? What are you waiting for cowboy?"

Nick rolled on top of me, joining our lips for a sensual kiss as his hands caressed the sides of my body. "All this time I've known you, I never thought we'd be sharin' somethin' so special." He smiled at me.

"Are you glad we are?"

"Very." He rasped. "The first time was a little weird coz your Greg . . . but now it seems perfect and right."

"Told yah." I smiled up at him. "And what do you mean weird coz I'm Greg? What's that supposed to mean?" I asked feeling offended.

"Well you know." He gulped nervously. "I-I just mean... You know... You're Greg Sanders, the quirky lab rat that danced in the halls with a show girl's hat on his head, along with a rubber glove." He anxiously chuckled. "You can make jokes out of anythin' . . . and you're always so confident and sure of yourself."

"Not always . . . you're forgetting tons of over stuff there that's different about me... do you think I'm a freak or something?" I pouted.

"No way, I think you're adorable . . . Oh but you did check out one of your dates DNA under the scope, that's a little freaky. I hope you don't do that to me."

"Technically... I already have." I cheekily grinned.

He looked at me surprised. "When?" He gasped.

"I'm not a crazy stalker before you start thinking that." I quickly clarified. "I had to look at your little swimmers for the Kristy Hopkins case."

"Oh." Nick remembered. "That's true." He ground his hips against me, kissing me passionately again. "Think it's time I take a look at your DNA again Sanders." He rasped as he worked my jeans open.

"You sure you want to?"

"Gotta keep practisin' . . . I don't want you to leave me for someone more experienced." He smiled, kissing me hungrily again.

"Never happen." I gasped as his hands slid beneath my boxers, making me harden instantly.

Nick slid my jeans and boxers off my legs so I was completely naked beneath him, working kisses across my jaw line, down my neck then across my exposed chest. I closed my eyes as his mouth enveloped me perfectly; weaving my fingers through his hair as he softly licked and sucked in all the right places, _just like a professional._

I moaned his name as I started to shudder, arching my chest up off the mattress as I felt the ecstasy surging through my body.

Nick returned to my mouth, kissing me deeply so I could taste myself on his tongue. _I love it when he does that. _Suddenly my doubts about him cheating on me were put aside. _Maybe I should tell him about the letter?_

Nick slowly pulled back, licking his lips, staring into my eyes lovingly. "Yep, you still taste perfect G . . . just as I thought, nice and sweet." He grinned down at me, brushing his fingers gently through my hair. "Do you wonna shower with me G?" He asked holding the condom packet and lube in his hand as a clear sign of what he wanted.

"Okay. I won't make you late will I?"

"No." He cheekily smiled pressing a kiss to my lips. "I always come on time." He joked, pulling me off the bed with him.

"My God, a quick chat with Starla and you're completely gay." I laughed. "She turn you off women completely?"

"No, one quick chat with Starla made me realise how much more I love bein' with you G. You're perfect, irresistibly gorgeous and sexy as hell." He rasped, pulling me into the bathroom with him. I slid his jeans down off his legs then lifted his shirt off his head as we kissed our way towards the shower.

Nick flung his boxers off as I pulled us under the spray of the shower, watching as he set the supplies down on the side. "Remember our first shower together?" He rasped against my parted lips.

"How could I forget?" I smiled widely at him, between kisses, caressing my hands down his silky smooth body.

"I can't believe how far we've come." He cupped my face in his hands, looking passionately into my eyes. "I really do love you Greg. I've never felt like this over anybody before." He tilted his head to the side, smothering me in lusty kisses as his hands slid down my body to rest at my hips. "You're bruises are gone." He suddenly noticed my arms.

"I told you they were no big deal." Nick lifted my wrist to his mouth, softly kissing the skin that was once bruised. "I bruise easily."

"I'm so glad you're okay. I don't know what I'd do without you G."

"Let's not find out." I smiled at him, circling my arms around his waist to pull us closer together. "C'mon, you really are going to be late for work at this rate."

"Right." Nick covered my mouth with his as he ground his hips against me, slowly turning me in his arms to face the wall. I closed my eyes as the water poured down across my face, feeling two of Nick's lube coated fingers steadily slipping inside of me. I held the bar in front of me to keep myself steady as my knees started to weaken already.

Nick dispensed warm kisses to my neck and back before I heard the condom wrapper opening and his fingers slipped out of me under much protest. Nick gently kicked my feet apart a little more to spread my legs before he slipped himself inside me.

I gave out a loud gasp as he slid so smoothly inside of me, feeling his arms wrapping around my chest as he slowly started thrusting his hips towards me. The world around me began to melt away as Nick made passionate blissful love to me. _I'm so glad he still feels confident enough to touch me even though we're back in Vegas._

He soon had us both seeing stars, so much so that I actually fell asleep _again_ in his arms this time.

I woke up a few hours later on the bed, feeling completely relaxed. This time I hadn't been awoken by some horrible nightmare. I yawned widely then heard a high pitched ring coming from the bedside table. _God that bloody phone again! I really must change the ring tone._

I reached over for it, snapping it open as I put it to my ear I yawned again. "Sa-Sanders."

"_I knew you'd fall asleep again." _Nick answered with a laugh.

"I did not." I lied, trying to hold out another yawn.

Nick laughed into the phone again as he heard me trying to stifle a yawn. "_This is the fourth time I've called you today Greg. And the only time you've answered."_

"I coulda been busy."

"_You were asleep; I know your just woken up voice well." _He smirked. "_Greg you gotta stay awake if you wonna get your sleepin' schedule back on track or you'll be completely exhausted by the time you come into work in a few days."_

"I've got plenty of time to switch over. I was just about to start the laundry."

"_Really?" _He laughed, not believing me for a second. "_What are you wearin' right now then G?" _I looked around the dimly lit bedroom, reaching for the bedside light. I lifted the covers slightly, looking down at myself to see I hadn't even got dressed since our shower together. "_You're still in bed right where I left yah, huh?"_

"How do you know these things?" I giggled, rolling onto my stomach. "Do you have a secret spy cam in my bedroom somewhere?"

"_Nope . . . maybe I should get one though so I can catch you out when yah lyin' to me you little tease."_

"Kinky." I cheekily giggled. "That's not a half bad idea actually Nicky, maybe you can pick one up on your lunch break, I can put on a little show for yah?" I teased him. "Do you think Grissom would mind you watching porn on your off hours? Or do you think he'd join you."

"_Ew Greg . . . you really are a horny lil perv G, you ruined a perfectly good tease by addin' Grissom. I don't want him pervin' over my pervy little boyfriend."_

"I'm not a perv; the camera was your idea." I laughed, feeling him rolling his eyes at me through the phone. "Even if I am I'm your horny little perv of a boyfriend."

"_And don't you forget it baby." _He chuckled softly. "_I gotta get back to work now G, just wanted to make sure you were awake!"_

"And I was."

"_Yeah, yeah... go and do somethin' to keep yourself awake until I get home Bubba."_

"Craving me already Sugarplum?"

"_Yep, I'm shakin' and sweatin' like a drug addict without a fix." _He teased me. I licked my lips, still able to taste him on my breath. "_Luckily I stole a kiss before I left so I can still kinda taste you, but I'm gonna need another fix soon... shoulda never gone cold turkey from you baby." _He joked, but I think he was actually seriously craving me.

"You got spoiled too fast cowboy." I chortled.

"_Yeah, but you are irresistible G." _I smiled widely, rolling onto my back again. "_I'll call yah later baby, or text yah if I'm workin' late." _All these years I've known him I always thought he was a straight up tough guy but he really does have a romantic soft side to him. I've grown super addicted to his affection over the past few days.

"Okay . . . you really are a big softie Nicky."

"_Only to you though Greg, don't tell anyone." _He joked. "_Bye baby, gotta go . . . don't go back to sleep." _He warned me before he hung up.

"Even to dream of you?"

"_Especially that, I'll be home to you as soon as I can."_

"Okay, love you Nicky."

"_Love you too Bubba."_

_There's that nickname again. _Bubba. _I suppose it's not so bad._

I snapped my phone shut with a Cheshire grin on my face, taking a minute to stretch out and wake up before I crawled out of bed to get some clothes on, to only realise all my stuff needed washing. I grabbed a pair of Nick's boxers then started the first laundry load, sitting myself in front of the television to catch up on everything I TiVo'd while I was away.

I started off with some Lost; Hurley's gotta be my favourite character. I especially loved the episode when he tried to help Jack out, but his hemophobia got to him and he collapsed during the surgery; it reminds me of when I first went out into the field as Nick's assistant. As soon as that bus driver started choking up blood I completely froze up. I never knew I was afraid of blood before then, it doesn't bother me so much anymore, but you never forget your first time. _Certainly not my first time with Nick. _That one will live with me forever!

I stayed put on the sofa until the first load of washing was done, putting in the next load before I returned to the sofa with a bag of thin and crispy potato chips, barbeque flavour. _Mmm, my favourite. _Nick tells me not to eat them because he's so concerned with his diet and everything. But I never get fat no matter what I eat, _and they taste good!_

Thinking of Nick again made me think back to the love letter.

I pulled the love letter out from under the sofa to read through it again. If I had Nick's phone book I could look through it to find this mysterious Cathleen. The envelope didn't have an address on it so she must have hand delivered it.

_Ooh! I have an idea. _I quickly grabbed some of my clothes, which I soon found out were still a little bit wet, before heading off downstairs to my car.

* * *

"You want me to what?" Mandy asked confused.

I rolled my eyes at her, I explained it very clearly to her, yet she was still looking at me like I was off my nut. "Run. The. Prints." I clearly stated to her again, checking the halls constantly to make sure Nick didn't see me. It was bad enough that I didn't tell him about the letter, but now I was even checking it for prints. _What was I going to do next?_ Get an arrested warrant for this Cathleen woman for taking an interest in _my boyfriend?_

"Okay." She sighed heavily, pulling some gloves on to print the letter and envelope in my hands.

"Don't read it though." I warned her as she started to look it over. "I just need to know whose prints are on it."

"Did you touch it?" I nodded. Mandy pulled out a print card handing it to me. "I'll need yours to exclude them from the others." I quickly ducked under the table as I saw Nick walking past in the hallway talking with Sara. I watched him go then saw Mandy crouch down too. "Greg? What are you doing?" She asked completely confused, looking at me like I was an idiot now.

"I don't want anyone to see me. It's supposed to be my day off." I simply explained, climbing to my feet again. "Can you do it for me or not?"

"I can. Prints." She ordered, pointing to the ten card. I opened the little ink pallet, pressing my fingers into them then onto the ten card, leaving perfect imprints of my fingerprints. "So why do you want me to print a love letter addressed to Nick?" I kept quite watching her taking some prints off the letter. "So why are you spying on Nick's love life?"

"I'm not." I protested, folding my arms across my chest. "Just do the prints Mandy!"

"Okay." She smiled widely. "Let's see if they're in the system then." Mandy scanned the prints into her computer, starting a comparison match.

"How long will this take?" I anxiously asked, keeping an eye on Nick in the DNA lab with Wendy.

"Not long. Patience Greg." She smiled at me. "So... I've always suspected there was something a little off about you. I never thought you had the hots for Nick though."

"I don't."

"You're just stalking him then? Isn't that a little creepy?" She snickered. "Got a match." I walked round the table to look over her shoulder. "Cathleen Taylor. She's a criminal lawyer."

"Can you bring up a picture?"

Mandy looked at me curiously. "What's it worth to you?"

"Huh?"

"Seeing the woman Nick's been screwing? What's it worth to you? Are you jealous of him, or in love with him?"

"The picture Mandy." I insisted, but she held it captive and she was surprisingly strong for a lab tech girl. I tried to open it myself but she could easily defend me off. _Maybe I'm really just that pathetic. _"Okay... I'll give you twenty dollars." I pulled my wallet out, handing over the money.

Mandy held it up to the light, checking it was real then opened the picture. I watched as she brought it up seeing a very smart looking woman with wavy black hair and crystal blue eyes. I had never seen her before and Nick had never talked about her either. "Thanks Mandy. Don't tell anyone." I went to grab the letter but she held it out of my reach. "Mandy." I moaned.

"What's it worth to you?"

"What? I just gave you twenty dollars."

"That was for the picture. What's it worth to you to keep this a secret?" She smiled widely at me.

I groaned heavily, folding my arms across my chest. "God is everyone out to blackmail me? Do I have schmuck written across my forehead?"

"No. What do you mean everyone?" She asked confused.

"Never mind . . . How about . . . dinner?" I suggested.

"You're gonna buy me dinner?"

"Sure." I nodded. "As friends . . . not in a date like capacity." I warned her.

"Obviously if you're gay." She laughed at me. "How about a date of my choice? You can come along for morale support."

"Morale support for what?"

She tapped her nose smiling at me. "I'll call you later with the details." She winked, ushering me off out of her lab. "Don't worry, I won't tell a soul you've got the hots for Nick Stokes and you're spying on him."

"I'm not." I angrily protested, checking Nick's whereabouts in the lab.

"If you say so." She chuckled. I frowned at her, sneaking out of the lab the same way I got in without anyone seeing me, heading towards my car.

I drove off to get a burrito to snack on before I got back to the laundry at home. As I was walking back to my car from Wal-mart I saw Rita, Ryan's mother. _What the hell is she doing here? _I thought about turning round and heading back but she had already seen me.

"You. Greg Sanders." She shouted. "You're Greg, right?"

"Um..." _Don't answer that Greg! _I warned myself. "So what if I am?" _Smooth Greg!_

"Are you Greg Sanders, the Greg Sanders that got my son arrested? The Greg Sanders who slept with my son, the disgusting little queer who turned my son gay again."

"Okay, technically your son was always gay. And he attacked me."

"Oh shut up you little queer!"

"Can people stop calling me little?" I moaned frustrated. "I'm not that small." _That's really not the point Greg!_

"Just stay away from my son." She shouted angrily.

"I'm not very likely gonna go and see him in jail am I?"

"He won't be in there for long you little shit! His brothers a lawyer you know. He'll be out of there before you know it!" She shouted then stormed off.

I leant against the side of my car, hearing her words echoing in my head. _He'll be out of there before you know it. _Over and over again.

_No! Please No!_

* * *

**Sorry it took so long. Really busy few days at work and on the one day I did have off I suffered a complete writers block, unable to write a thing. But it seems to have worn off.**

**I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**Please Review**


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter Twenty Six:**

"Greg." Nick gently shook me awake. I rubbed my eyes open looking up at him, realising I had fallen asleep on the sofa. Nick sat on the coffee table, pressing a soft kiss to my forehead. "You fell asleep again G... and you're eatin' potato chips." He noticed the bag on the coffee table beside him. "Greg, do you realise how many calories are in those."

_Here we go again!_

I grabbed the bag from him to read it. "Yes... 160. But I didn't eat the whole bag... and I was only asleep for..." I looked up at the clock. "Two hours."

"When did you buy these? I never saw them?"

"Because I went shopping today and I hide my snack foods from you." I smiled up at him.

"You're cheatin' on me with potato chips." He smirked then snatched the bag from my hands to read the back. "There's 15 grams of carbs in these Greg."

"Nick, you're the health conscious one, not me."

"Clearly." He laughed; holding the bag out of my reach. "Have you done anythin' constructive with your day?"

I looked up at him a moment, thinking whether I should tell him or not about Ryan's crazy mother. _I decided not. _"Yes . . . laundry." I climbed off the sofa to unload the next load. "Opps."

"What?" Nick looked over the counter seeing bits of tissue stuck to all the clothes as I pulled them out. "You didn't check the pockets first?" He asked shocked. "Greg!"

"Please stop nagging me; this is starting to feel like a marriage."

"I didn't mean to nag." He smiled softly, stepping up behind me. "Well you get it pick it all off. At least it's clean." He smirked, pressing a kiss to my cheek. "How about from now on _I_ do the washin'." He suggested, looking through the fridge for something to eat.

"We don't have any food . . . except my secret stash."

Nick looked at me confused. "You went shoppin' today... and you didn't buy food?" I shook my head. Nick placed his hands on his hips as he looked at me. "Where's your secret stash then?"

"If I told you, it wouldn't be a secret." I smirked at him.

Nick's mouth spread into a wide smile. He stood perfectly still a moment then suddenly reached out and started tickling me furiously. "Tell me G!" He laughed as I squirmed in his arms. We both toppled over the laundry basket, crashing together on the ground where Nick sat on top of me, continuing to tickle me, demanding to know where my stash was, but I refused to give it up as I giggled and squirmed beneath him.

"No, no... Nicky."

"Tell me. Then I'll stop." He laughed, tickling my exposed stomach as the fabric was all scrunched up chest.

"Be-behind the Kleenex." I gave in, pointing up to the top cupboard. Nick ceased his tickling, but didn't climb off me straight away. He leant down towards my lips, softly capturing them between his for a sweet sensual kiss.

"I was hopin' you wouldn't give in that easy." He rasped, softly sucking my tongue into his mouth as he devoured me with his hungry eyes.

"Really? What were you going to do if the tickling didn't work?" I queried with a cheeky grin.

"I'd of thought of somethin'." He whispered softly, sliding one hand down the front of my jeans as he kissed me again. I closed my eyes as he started to work kisses across my chest, feeling a sudden chill running through my body.

"No wait. Stop!" I pushed him back before his hand slid south of my waistband, leaning up on my elbows to face a confused expression on Nick's face. "Not here." My voice sounded shaky as I spoke.

Nick looked at me a moment then nodded as if he understood what I meant without me having to explain it. Ryan tried to rape me just a few feet from where we fell and it was all a little bit too traumatic and I'm thankful Nick understood without me having to explain my reasons. _I'm glad he didn't think I was crazy either,_ _that's the cool thing about Nick, he's always so understanding and he's never judgemental._

"Sorry." I whispered softly.

"Don't be sorry Greg." Nick pulled me to my feet, lacing our hands together as we kissed. "So what kinda food do you have in this stash of yours?"

"Not much."

Nick's curiosity got the better of him. He pulled open the top cupboard, moving the multi-pack boxes of Kleenex out the way. "Devils dogs?" Nick asked shocked then immediately read the back. "29 grams of carbs." He looked in the cupboard again. "Chocolate cupcakes and Pringles? Greg, do you even know how to eat healthy?"

"You've never once cared about my diet before Nicky."

"Yeah well, we're datin' now. I told you I'm controllin' . . . you better get used to it. Get some shoes on."

"Where are we going?"

"Shopping, for some real food, I'm starvin'." He smirked, pecking me on the cheek as he stepped past me to go to the bathroom. I reluctantly head off towards the bedroom to grab some sneakers from my closet, quickly re-styling my hair as the back was a little messed up.

Nick re-emerged from the bathroom a few minutes later, wrapping his arms around my waist from behind me as I looked in the mirror, hugging me tightly. "Mmmm, I missed you." He rasped against my neck, placing a soft kiss to my jaw line. "You okay G?" I nodded leaning back into his embrace. "C'mon, let's go get somethin' to eat."

"Will you let me get whatever I want?" I asked, looking up into his eyes.

"One treat!" He warned me. "You gotta start eatin' healthy now." I pouted up at him. "What's wrong with me wantin' to take care of my boyfriend's body?" He asked with an adorable smile on his face as he slid his hands down my sides. "You do have one gorgeous body Greg, you gotta look after it Bubba. When we get there I'll show yah what the fruit and veg aisle looks like too." He teased me. "I can't believe a great cook like you still eats crap."

"I'm lazy." I smirked, leaning further back into his embrace. "Just because I can cook doesn't mean I like to." Nick turned me in his arms to ignite a hungry kiss.

"Will you cook, if it's for me?" He asked between kisses.

"Definitely. You know . . . I know a great source of protein that doesn't cost a thing." I cheekily grinned, pushing him back onto the edge of the bed, surprising him. He leant up on his elbows as I climbed on top of him, engaging in a ravenous kiss.

"Don't you wonna go shoppin' before we start foolin' around?" Nick asked pulling back.

"You already got me really worked up for yah though. I can't stay ten feet away from you in Wal-mart after that." I simply explained, popping open his jeans.

Nick shivered slightly from the simple action, but he didn't stop me so I assumed he wanted more. I placed soft kisses to his jaw line and lips, gently grazing my teeth against his manly jaw. I slowly worked my way down to his collar bone, sliding his jeans past his knees along with his boxers then pushed his shirt up his chest as I worked kisses down his taut stomach towards my final destination.

It wasn't long before he was seeing stars and moaning my name as he panted heavily, slowly coming down from his high.

I returned to his mouth to kiss him hungrily, giving him a wide smile. "That still doesn't get you off the hook though G." He warned me. "You're still gonna eat healthier."

"I can't just have a helping of you everyday to keep me healthy?" I sweetly teased him, softly sucking on his jaw as I innocently looked into his eyes.

"Cute won't work on me G." He laughed, pulling me closer to kiss my lips. "Although it does turn me on." He grazed his lips across mine, looking deep into my eyes. "I can't believe how happy I am with you Greg. It's like I've finally found what was missin' all these years... scratch that... I mean it is." He smoothly ran his fingertips across my cheek looking into my eyes then moved in for another possessive kiss.

"Mmmm, we should go before we get too caught up." He softly smiled as he pulled back.

"Fine by me." I snatched a quick kiss then climbed off the bed, pulling Nick to his feet to redress him. "I don't mind doing this healthier eating thing for you Nick; I'll do anything for you. You've done so much for me already."

"I have?"

"Yep." I nodded, smiling widely as he hadn't even noticed how happy he's made me. _Before I had Nick I was a wreck and now I feel like me again. _"C'mon let's go." I reached out for his hand, lacing my fingers with his as we made our way to the elevator.

We immediately separated as the doors opened out to the lobby, heading off for Nick's truck in the parking lot.

Before Nick could put some of his hick music on, I quickly shoved one of my CD's in there, skipping ahead a few tracks to 'Beautiful People by Marilyn Manson.' Nick gave me a slight glare as he started up the truck. He was probably wondering what crazy music we would be listening to for the drive to Wal-mart.

He stopped me from turning the volume up too loud and complained he couldn't concentrate while I was singing along and head banging, but I could tell he was desperately trying not to laugh at me too.

I started to sing along louder, watching a smile inching across his lips. "Hey you, what do you see? Something beautiful, something free? Hey you, are you trying to be mean. If you live with apes it's hard to be clean. The worms will live in every host. It's hard to pick one they eat most..."

"Greg, not so loud." Nick struggled not to laugh.

"It's Marilyn Manson, you're meant to sing it loud." I chuckled. "Here, I'll put this one on." I skipped ahead to 'The fight song.'

"Why this one?"

"Once the chorus kicks in its too quick for me to sing along and head bang at the same time." I grinned at him then started head banging as the intro started up.

"You're crazy Greg." He laughed at me.

"Yep, but you're crazy _about_ me."

"I'm definitely crazy too then." He laughed, watching me head banging and trying to sing along.

Once the fight song finished I skipped ahead to another track, leaning back in my seat. "This one's for you." Nick looked at me curiously listening to the lyrics just starting up and I joined in again. "I put a spell on you, because you're mine. I can't stand the things that you do. No, no, no, I ain't lyin'. No. I don't care if you don't want me. Cause I'm yours, yours, yours anyhow. Yeah I'm yours, yours, yours. I love you. I love you. I love you. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Ye..."

"Okay I get it." He shouted over the music. "I'm startin' to get a headache now G, but thanks all the same." He laughed, turning the music off. "Whoever thought you could express your love through Marilyn Manson." He chuckled. "Well _you_ could obviously."

"Marilyn Manson can be quite the romantic." I informed him.

"Really?" He asked not convinced.

"Yep, there's a song called Valentine's Day too yah know. The lyrics aren't that romantic though..."

"Please don't sing it."

"Why? Am I a terrible singer?" I asked, flashing a grin at him.

"No, you're a _loud_ singer." He snickered as he pulled into Wal-Mart. He pulled into a parking spot then looked around to check the coast was clear before he leant in for a quick kiss. "Thank you for playin' me that god awful song G." He grinned widely against my lips. "But it's the thought that counts. I got your meanin' behind the lyrics, and thanks. I love you too."

"Good." I smiled, climbing out of his truck. "I might play you some more sometime that have more meaning behind them."

"Can't wait." He said sarcastically as we both laughed our way into Wal-Mart.

"Can we get cookies?" I asked; when Nick shook his head I tried to manipulate him with my pouting lip and puppy dog expression that I know he can't resist.

"No Greg." He smiled, not sounding very convincing. "You can't have cookies." I continued to pout, fluttering my eyelashes at him slowly. "This isn't fair Greg, you can't keep doin' that?"

"I'm not doing anything." I smiled innocently. "I just want some cookies."

"Fine, but don't get any old crap!" He sternly warned me. I smiled innocently again, grabbing the chocolaty chocolate chip ones. "Greg." He moaned, but I flashed the puppy dog expression again, feeling a little bad for manipulating him, _but I wanted cookies! Is that so wrong?_

Nick led us round to the fruit and vegetable section. _Being evil and insulting me_ by asking me to name the fruits or vegetables he held up. "Okay Greg, what's this one?"

"I'm not playing your stupid game anymore." I pouted, leaning on the end of the trolley.

"Starts with a D."

"Douche bag?" I asked.

"Technically that's two words and it's not a fruit. It's a date." He smirked.

"I know." I mumbled. "I'm not eating that."

"You are." He smiled widely, dropping it into the trolley.

"Can we get some Jell-O?"

"No."

"There's fruit in it!" I complained.

"It's loaded with artificial sweeteners though." He reminded me.

"Ooh pwease Nicky." I pouted, acting triply cute.

"No, I've already given you Cookies, Doughnuts, Yodels and Devil Dogs. I shouldn't have even done that. I'm gonna be a terrible father."

"No you're not, you're kids gonna love yah . . . I'll trade the Yodels for some Jell-O?" I pleaded.

Nick looked at my puppy dog expression, easily falling for it again. "What flavour?" He gave in.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you! Green Apple." I smiled victoriously.

Nick removed the Yodels then dropped the Jell-O it into our shopping cart, heading off through the store to do the rest of _our_ shopping; only I wasn't allowed to decide what we'd be eating. Everything had to have Nick's approval before it was dropped into the cart.

We loaded the shopping into his truck then head off home. Nick immediately stopped me from putting the radio back on; giving me a smug smile so instead I decided to talk his ears off. "You know Nick. Healthy people don't actually live any longer then people who chow down on a Yodel every once in a while. Statistics show that people who have more birthdays live longer."

"Well of course, the more yah have the older you get." He smirked.

"Exactly, so some ninety year old has had years of eating birthday cake and he's still alive. Why can't I? I'm almost thirty. We're all just as likely to get hit by the same bus, no matter what age we are."

"Really? Is that what you think G?"

"Yep, we could be dead any second. I could die 3 years from now, 3 months or even 3 seconds. You never know when you're gonna die Nicky. You live each day to the fullest . . . before you know it, you could be thrown through a window, involved in an explosion, buried alive... you never know when you're gonna die."

"I don't want you to die. Why did you have to say 3 years? Couldn't you make it more like 40 or somethin'?"

"Hypothetically speaking Nick. It's true though. I could have died in that lab explosion and you'd of never known what it's like to kiss me."

"I'm glad you did survive and I'm glad I did kiss you . . . is this just your way of gettin' out of the healthy lifestyle?" He asked curiously.

"No, like I'd ever do a thing like that." I laughed innocently. "No I'll do it; I'll do it for you. But I'm not going to the gym with you, or jogging. I don't do sports."

"Joggin' isn't a sport."

"Then why do people compete in it, running around tracks and stuff?" I asked him.

"Jogging to stay healthy; isn't. You're comin' joggin' with me G. Every mornin'."

"Ooh, do I hafta?" I pouted.

"Yes." Nick looked away from me to avoid the pouting lip he couldn't resist. "Yes Greg, you're not gonna manipulate your way out of this one. It'll be somethin' we can do together."

"Out of all the things we could possibly do together, you want to go jogging? How am I supposed to talk to you if your fifty feet in front of me the whole time?"

"Fifty feet? You can't be that slow." Nick parked the car, looking round at me. "It's either joggin' or the gym."

"If I go to the gym can I just watch you then I don't have to do the jogging thing?"

"No. How is that gonna help? C'mon. Out." Nick climbed out the car, collecting the shopping from the back. "Greg. Sittin' there poutin' won't work on me." I looked in the mirror to look round at him with my pouting. "It's not workin' on me!"

I reluctantly climbed out the car, walking round the back to take some of the bags from him. "If I do this for you, you have to do something for me Nicky." I smiled, seductively licking my lips at him. I twirled around, cheekily shaking my hips at him as I walked away.

Nick quickly hauled the shopping in, locking the door then pinned me against the open fridge as I started unloading the stuff. "You're a little tease Greg." He rasped.

"I have the sexiest boyfriend ever, you expect me to _not _tease you?"

"You could use a little subtly Greg. Anyone could have been watchin'." He smirked, sliding his hands down either side of my chest. "What do you want to eat?"

"Pizza." I turned in his arms to press a kiss to his lips. "If you say no, too bad. It's already cooking."

"Glad to see we don't make decisions together." He smirked, lifting me onto the counter.

"Well I think we've both already decided what we're gonna do while we wait." I laughed, sliding my hand across his hard crotch. I stopped as I heard his cell phone ring. Nick pulled it out of his jeans pocket, biting his lip as he looked up at me. The expression said it all. _Starla!_ "Take it." I pressed a kiss to his cheek, jumping off the counter.

"Hello." Nick mumbled, leaning back against the fridge while I continued to unpack the shopping. "No, I can't . . . because... I'm busy . . . yeah I'll be there . . . I won't forget." Nick snapped his phone shut then turned it off, setting it on top of the fridge.

"Starla?" I asked.

"Yep, she's got a doctor's appointment tomorrow and she wanted me to go over now to discuss the changes we need to make before the baby gets here."

"Changes?" I asked curiously. "What kinda changes?"

"We'll talk about this later." Nick stepped past me, heading down the hall to the bathroom.

_Well we did both decide then Starla made the decision to stop us from having sex. Just because she's pregnant she thinks no one else can get any!_

* * *

Later that night I snapped my eyes open feeling my heart pounding against the surface of my chest. I reached out for Nick, wrapping his arm around my waist as I snuggled closer to him. Nick sighed a deep breath as he readjusted against me, softly pressing a kiss to my neck. "What's up Greg?" He whispered without opening his eyes.

"Nicky, I have to tell you something." I rolled onto my side to face him, softly shaking him awake. "It's really important." I softly tapped him on the chest. "Nick, please. I have to tell you this."

"Talk then." He sleepily mumbled, running his hand down my chest with his eyes still closed.

"Today I kinda saw someone." Nick remained silent. "Nick. Are you listening to me?"

"How can you kinda see someone Greg?" He yawned widely, still asleep.

"Ryan's mom." Nick's eyes immediately snapped open. "She saw me in the parking lot."

"Did she say anythin' to you?"

"Yes . . . am I little?"

"Huh?"

"People keep calling me little. Starla called me a little dweeb. Ryan used to call me a little shit and his mother called me a little queer." Nick looked at me wide eyed then gave me a half smile. "It's not funny!"

"I didn't say it was G. Just most people would be more concerned that they were called dweeb, shit and a queer. You only hear the little part."

"Am I little?"

"No. You're not little Greg."

"You call me a little tease. I must be little."

"Greg, you're not little. What else did Ryan's mother say to you?" He asked.

"That Ryan's getting out."

Nick looked at me wide eyed then shook his head. "There's no way he's gettin' out Greg. He's goin' down for assault."

"Ryan's brothers a lawyer apparently."

"Greg, I promise you, he's not gettin' out." Nick pulled me closer, wrapping his arms around me tightly. "Three of my sisters are lawyers along with my mother and my father's a judge remember. Believe me I know these things Greg. Just don't worry about it Bubba." He whispered, trying to go back to sleep. "And you're not little." He assured me. "Now go to sleep."

I pulled his warm hands tighter around me, closing my eyes to try and get back to sleep in his arms. "Then... why do you call me little?" I started to think out loud.

Nick slowly opened his eyes, looking up at me, raising his eyebrows. "Greg... you're not little."

"Why do you call me little?"

"It's an expression." He sighed heavily.

"But if everyone says it... it must be true. Just like this friend of my moms. Everyone used to call him big Dave. He wasn't overly tall or fat so I wondered why they called him that, but I found out how big he was down there when I saw him and my auntie getting it on in the summer house."

"Greg, you're becomin' obsessed over this. You're at least a few inches taller than me. You're taller than Sara . . . I think. It's an expression, okay? Go to sleep." He sighed softly. I watched him sleeping a moment then saw his eyes snap open again. "Okay, get up."

"What? Why?" I asked confused.

"To prove to you that you're not little." He swept back the covers, pulling us both to our feet. Nick grabbed a pen off the side, pushing me against the doorframe softly. He marked a line to where my head came up to then handed the pen to me. He leant against the doorframe himself for me to mark it out.

His marker came just an inch below mine.

"See, you need more proof that you're not little?" He asked. "Or you wonna get a ruler out to check the rest yourself?"

"No, I'm good."

"Good, can we go to sleep now?" I nodded; writing our names next to the markers then crawled back into bed with him. "Thank you. Goodnight Greg."

"Goodnight." I smiled softly as we cuddled up under the sheets together again. "Little Nicky." I teased him, watching him frowning at me.

* * *

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	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter Twenty Seven:**

"Greg." Nick whispered, dropping soft kisses to my jaw line. "I'm off to work." He smiled as I opened my eyes. "I'll see you later Bubba." I put my arm around his neck to pull him closer towards me for a kiss, softly weaving my fingers through his hair. I closed my eyes as his tongue slipped into my mouth, softly caressing mine.

Nick slowly pulled back, looking into my eyes. "I love you."

"I love you too." I whispered softly. Nick kissed me again then lifted my arms off his neck so he could get away.

"Hey G, call me if you need me." He winked, heading out the door. I waved him off then lay back down to get a little more sleep. I wondered if Nick remembered the conversation we had last night, especially the stuff about Rita Clark and Ryan's possible escape route. _Were they seriously going to let him go just because his family thinks he's innocent and I'm the queer that turned him? _He did tell me he hated conversion therapy the first time around; maybe his family will try that with him again? _Not that I care. Even though that's not the point. _He wasn't arrested because he was queer after all. He was arrested for assault, almost of the sexual variety. He deserves whatever he's got coming to him. _Especially jail._

_I'm sure he'll be right at home there._

After three more hours of thinking I decided to go out to buy some Chinese food to snack on since the house was full of healthy food. _Just have to remember to brush my teeth and get rid of the evidence before Nick kisses me again. _Then he'll never know.

I ate in my car outside of Wal-mart before I head in to buy some more beers. As I was leaving I got a phone call from my mother. "Sanders." I groaned.

"_Stop being so professional sweetheart. You could tell it was me from the way you sighed heavily before you answered me."_

"Shouldn't you be on your honeymoon? Not telling me how to answer the phone."

"_I've just got home actually. How was your vacation with Nicky? I noticed the house has been cleaned, tip top condition. So how did it go?" _Great! Now she wants to know about my sex life. Before I know it she'll be telling me about hers, when I really don't wonna hear about my parents getting it on. _Especially since I don't trust my dad still._

"It went okay I guess. How was the honeymoon and PG it for me, please? I don't want the gory details Mom." I warned her, hanging outside the doors of Wal-mart.

"_I would never give you the gory details. I don't know what you take me for Gregory. It went okay I guess. We had dinner together every night. He even cooked for me can you believe..."_

"What did he cook?" I asked, knowing cooking wasn't my father's strong point.

"_Bacon and eggs. He tried sweetheart." _She chuckled.

"How did he do?"

"_Well the eggs were a little rubbery and the bacon a little burnt. Anyway, did Nicky cook for you?"_

"Yes, he makes to die for Fajitas." I smiled widely as I remembered the to die for sex with him while we were waiting for it to cook. "My boyfriends a better cook then yours."

"_Ooh boyfriend, huh? And did you two... mm mm mmm?"_

"Mother! You can't ask me that! But yes we are boyfriends now. That's all I will reveal."

"_Ooh, you're no fun. I'll have to get it out of Nicky."_

"No, you can't do that. Nick's just getting used to me, he can't put up with you too."

"_I'm not so bad. And it's a little late anyway."_

"What do you mean it's a little late?" I asked shocked. "Mom! What have you done?"

"_Relax sweetheart, I'm just here at the lab. I had a quick chat with Nicky and that woman that tried to kill you..."_

"Catherine? She didn't try to kill me Mom!"

"_Yeah! Yeah! Whatever." _She mumbled sarcastically. "_Anyway, everyone's missing you here. I met your supervisor again that Gil Grissom guy."_

Ooh Shhhhiiiit!

"_Why didn't you tell me you got a promotion that's worth less money, honey? Why on earth would you take a job like that? Honestly sweetheart, I thought you had more brains than that. Anyway he couldn't tell me what the promotion was because he had to rush off to some meeting. Is it like a higher lab position or something... Oh must dash, Nicky's just getting off for a break...."_

"No Mom..."

"_Bye." _She hung up on me before I could protest any further.

I snapped my phone shut in annoyance, stuffing it in my pocket then rushed off for my car. I quickly ducked as I saw Rita and two rather large looking guys stood beside her and they were waiting by _my_ car. _Oh Shit, why do I always have to shop here!_

I quickly ducked back into Wal-mart before they spotted me, leaning against the wall so I was completely hidden from sight. They were definitely waiting for me as they were watching the doors like hawks, waiting right beside _my_ car. _Luckily they didn't see me though!_

I couldn't stay here all day though and they didn't look like they were going to be leaving anytime soon. I had to come up with a plan. _I could leg it? _All the way to my apartment though? I doubt I could even make it half way. Next best thing.

_Call the boyfriend._

I pulled my cell phone out; hitting Nick's speed dial as I stayed leant up against the wall behind me. Unfortunately the call went straight through to his voicemail though. He must have turned it off to talk to my mother.

I sighed heavily, deciding not to leave a message as he wouldn't get until he's back on shift then he won't be able to help me out anyway because he'd be working again.

_Oh Great!_ What am I supposed to do now?

"Greg?" A voice completely startled me. I looked round to see Stuart, a guy I used to go clubbing with all the time before I met Ryan.

"Stuart." I smiled up at him. "Hi, long time no see." He looked like he had gain a little weight, but his short cropped hair style was pretty much the same.

"Yeah, you look great Greg. How have you been?"

"Okay I guess." I nodded, checking Rita and the other two guys hadn't seen me. "How about you?"

"Oh, not so good... well my parents have kinda put me in conversion therapy."

"Do they know you're wearing that shirt?" I smirked as it said 'I'm here and I'm queer.'

"Have you ever been to conversion therapy Greg? It's a load of bull shit. We're told to think of nature or something when we feel sexually aroused towards the same sex."

"Really? Is it working?" _I had to ask!_ He immediately ran his eyes across my figure. Technically we had never actually been together, but he was a very fine looking man. _Nothing like Nick though, by far! _"I have a boyfriend now." I quickly warned him.

"Really, congrats Greg. Me too. It's not that Ryan fella is it?"

"No." I groaned. "I don't know if you noticed but Ryan isn't exactly boyfriend material."

"I did warn you about that one Greg. So..." He looked out the doors of Wal-mart. "Who are you hiding from?"

"No one."

He laughed shaking his head at me. "You're so obvious Greg. So who is it?" He peered out the door again, noticing the three people by my car. As I hadn't gotten a new car in years he could easily find it. "Who are they?"

"My stalkers." I mumbled. "Hey you're a tall buff guy."

"I think that was a compliment." He smirked.

"It was. But not in that kinda way because I have a boyfriend who I love and I'm completely loyal to."

"Okay." Stuart nodded with a smug smile. "So what was the compliment for?"

"Can you walk with me to my car? Bruisers one and two over there could do some serious damage to my fragile frame, but you shouldn't have any problem with them." I explained.

Stuart looked out at them a moment then nodded to me.

"That's him, that's the little queer." Rita pointed me out. _I'm not little! _"This is probably his latest victim! Are you turning all the men queer?"

"Excuse me ma'am, who the hell are you?" Stuart demanded, puffing out his chest and buffing up his shoulders slightly more for intimidation. "You will not speak to Greg in that manner."

"I can speak to him however I like. He's completely corrupted my son, now he's rotting in a jail cell somewhere." Rita informed him.

Stuart raised his eyebrows slightly, but he stayed on my side.

"Greg hasn't done anything to anyone and if your son is this Ryan like I think it is, he deserves whatever's coming to him. Ryan has slept with half of Las Vegas men by his own free will." Stuart shouted at the three of them, making Bruisers one and two clench their fists at their sides in anger.

"We'll be seeing you in court, you little shit!" Rita warned me, shoving me hard as she stormed off with the bruisers, who I assumed were her other sons as they had similar features to Ryan. _I really gotta learn to toughen up! _Nick will think he's dating a little girl that can't defend herself. _Great! Now I'm saying it._

"I'm not little!" I shouted after her. Stuart smiled, standing beside me as we watched them high tailing it out of Wal-mart. "Thank you for that."

"Anytime Greg, so how come I haven't seen you out in a while?"

"Oh, well my new boyfriend... he's kinda . . . closeted. The whole club scene isn't really his thing."

"That's a shame. We coulda double dated or something."

"You're seeing someone?"

"Yep, I said it like five minutes ago." He chuckled. "I know it doesn't go with the conversion therapy thing." He laughed shaking his head. "Hey, have you got time for coffee?" I looked down at my watch then nodded. "Cool we can catch up. Your car or mine?"

"I have to make one quick stop first." _To keep my mother away from my boyfriend and tell my boss not to tell my mother I'm working in the field!_

"Sure okay."

"Mine then." I suggested, throwing my shopping in the back. Stuart nodded, climbing into the passenger side of my car. I drove us off towards the crime lab, leaving Stuart downstairs while I rushed upstairs to Grissom's office.

"Greg, you're not supposed to be back yet." He looked at me surprised.

"I know, I just wanted to ask you a favour." I checked the lab halls then walked closer to his desk. "Have you seen my mother today?"

"Yes, she was here a few minutes ago." He nodded, removing his glasses from his face.

"Okay, can you do me a huge favour and _not _tell her I'm working in the field. I haven't told her yet..."

"You've been working the field nearly a year and a half and you haven't told your own mother?"

"No, she's really over protective. She'll throw a fit if she finds out I'm working that job. So can you just keep it quiet until I tell her?" I pleaded. Grissom looked at me a moment, sucked in a deep breath then nodded. "Thank you."

"You're gonna have to tell her eventually though Greg. I'm sure she'd be very proud of you."

"Thank you. I'll see yah later then." I smiled, heading out of his office.

"Greg!" Nick's voice shouted. _Damn it, he's not supposed to see me. _I spun round to see he was in the locker room. "Hi, whatcha doin' here?"

"Um... I missed you."

"Yeah right." He chuckled. "Your Mom was here. You came to make sure no one revealed any of your secrets to her." He snickered, pulling me into the empty locker room with him.

"Yeah, but I did miss you too. You were my second priority."

"Second?" He gasped in shock then spread into a wide grin. "I didn't know I came second in your life."

"Only if there's something more important like keeping secrets from my Mom in the way."

"You've gotta tell her eventually G. I'm sure Carrie would be very proud of you, knowing everythin' you've done to help people."

"I can't." I looked down at the locker room floor then up into his eyes. "She made me promise, especially after you were kidnapped. She made me promise that I'd never go in the field."

"She won't be mad at you. Your Mom is always so proud of you. You're lucky G." Nick checked the door then advanced closer to me for a sweet passionate kiss. Nick abruptly pulled back, licking his lips. "I can't believe it; you're cheatin' on me with Chinese food?" He snickered.

"No..." I lied. _Crap I forgot to brush my teeth!_

"Are you lyin' to everybody?" He asked.

"No... I'm just keeping the peace. I was craving some Chinese food so I went and bought some. Don't be mad at me."

"How could I ever stay mad at you?" He grinned, cupping my face in his hands. "You're adorable and I love you very much." He kissed me again then smiled sweetly, looking into my eyes. "I'll see yah later Bubba."

"I love you too." I pressed a kiss to his cheek then walked off out the locker room.

I walked back down to the parking garage, joining Stuart in the car. I drove us off towards a nice enough diner, grabbing us a window booth while we were served up some coffee. We talked for hours about our boyfriends as if we were best friends or something, before I drove him back to his car then went home myself.

I sat on the sofa with a book and my I-Pod on, waiting for Nick to get home.

"Greg." Nick smiled, kissing me softly on the forehead. I felt the familiar tingles in my stomach that I always felt when he was intimate with me.

I looked up at him giving him a wide smile as I pulled the I-Pod buds from my ears. "Miss me?"

"Yes." Nick sat on the edge on the edge of the sofa beside me, leaning over me to kiss me. "I spent my whole lunch break with your mother."

"Oh God, she didn't talk your ears off about her sex life did she?" I panicked.

"No, she tried to get information about ours though." He smiled, softly kissing my lower lip, gazing into my eyes lovingly. "What did you do with your day?"

"Caught up with an old friend . . . Nicky, would you ever consider going on a date with me?"

"A date?"

"Yeah, it doesn't have to be anything in the romantic sense. We could just go for coffee, or dinner?" I suggested, looking up into his eyes as he thought about it. "We don't have to if you don't..."

"I do." Nick cut me off, kissing me softly again. "I would love to go on a date with you Greg Sanders." He slid his hand down my side towards the rim of my t-shirt as he kissed me hungrily. His warm hand slid across my chest while his other was entwined in my hair as we kissed. He slowly slid my t-shirt up my body, lifting it up over my head then lowered his mouth to my bare chest, softly kissing a line towards my neck.

"I can't wait to get home to you every day." Nick rasped against my neck, sliding a hand down the front of my jeans. I un-tucked his shirt from his jeans with one tug. Nick upped the heat of his kisses as I slid my hand across his taut stomach, smoothing it round to his broad back. "Did you miss me?" He panted across my lips.

"Definitely... Nicky, you know earlier you asked if I was lying to everyone?" Nick sat back slightly nodding. "It's nothing major. But I feel I should be one hundred percent honest."

"Okay." Nick braced himself.

I reached under the sofa for the hidden love letter, handing it over to him. "This was on our door when we got back from LA." Nick looked at me a moment then opened it to read it. "I'm sorry I hid it from you."

"Greg, don't worry about this. I... I don't even remember who this Cathleen is. This won't come between us will it?" I looked into his trusting eyes then shook my head. Nick tore the letter in half, tossing it over his shoulder. "Good, coz none of these women mean anythin' to me. You're the one for me now Greg."

"I believe you... now kiss me."

Nick grinned widely, swinging his leg over mine, straddling my thighs as he closed his eyes kissing me again. His smooth hands wandered across my body, fiddling with the clasp of my jeans belt. Before I knew it we were both completely naked, grinding against each other through lusty passionate kisses, soft desperate moans, reaching our highs at critical heat within seconds of each other.

A few minutes later we relaxed in each other's arms, catching up on some Discovery channel programs Nick had TiVo'd. I fell asleep to the steady beat of his heart beat, feeling completely at peace with Nick in my arms.

_I wonder how long it will last though._

"Greg, Mandy's on the phone for yah." Nick shook me awake, handing me the phone.

I rubbed my eyes then took the phone from his hands. "Hello?"

"_Hi Greg, not sleeping are yah? I'll be outside in... twenty minutes."_

"Twenty minutes for what?"

"_You're coming speed dating with me." _She excitedly announced.

"Ooh! Do I hafta?" I moaned, watching Nick giving me a funny look.

"_Yes, C'mon Greg, unless you want me to tell Nick that you're spyi..."_

"Okay, I'll be ready." I snapped the phone shut, setting it down on the coffee table. "I gotta go."

"Out with Mandy?"

"Yeah, I kinda promised her I would." I pressed a kiss to his lips, grabbing my clothes from the floor. "I'll be back as soon as I can."

"I won't be here..."

"Starla right." I groaned. "Are you gonna tell me what changes she wants to discuss with you?"

"It's just for the baby Greg, don't worry. It'll be fine." He pulled me closer to him to kiss me passionately. "I'll see yah later, have fun with Mandy."

"I doubt it." I mumbled, heading down the hall to grab a fresh t-shirt and jeans. I flattened my hair slightly then pulled my sneakers on as I hopped through the hall back towards Nick.

"Hey G." Nick pulled me onto his lap, kissing me softly. "I love you. This thing with Starla and the baby, it will never come between us."

"Okay. I love you too." I cupped his face in my hands as I kissed him, leaving him wanting more as I climbed off to grab my keys.

"G, phone." Nick held it up. I grabbed it from him then walked off towards the front door. "Love you Bubba."

"Love you too Tex." I winked, heading out the door.

I met Mandy in the lobby, looking at the corset like top she was wearing under a smart jacket. "I thought we're going speed dating?"

"Yeah, I don't know if you noticed Greg, but I've been single a while." She laughed, linking arms with me. "C'mon, my cars out front." I reluctantly followed her out, dreading about going on this speed dating experience with her.

Mandy bought the first round of drinks for us, before the man banged the gong loudly. He explained the rules to us then instructed the women to take their seats, while us men had to rotate round, having one minute to talk to each of them.

The first three were stalking my sperm already. They were asking questions about family illnesses and things, along with how many kids I would want and my style of parenting. The fourth one was looking for a weekend of sex; fifth one asked me if I was into anything kinky. The woman at table six was pretty good looking, but she had shit for brains. I told her I worked at the crime lab and she had no idea what I was saying. I even told her my family was Norwegian and she thought they died in the seventeen hundreds or something.

Then I got Mandy who asked me if I was gay.

"What? You're not allowed to ask me that."

"I can ask you anything I like. Are you?" She queried.

"Kinda . . . I'm bisexual."

"Bisexual. You know I never understood how that worked."

I looked around the room. "Well you see the girl at table six?" Mandy nodded. "I like her and... you see the guy at table nine?" Mandy looked the other way then nodded. "He's cute too."

"Okay, so you like people... no matter what gender?"

"Exactly." I nodded.

"Do you like me?" She asked just as the gong went for us to move tables.

I stared at her blankly, trying to think of my answer when the next guy shouted at me, ushering me out of my seat so he could talk to Mandy. I slowly moved onto the next table, feeling cold chills up my spine. Whatever my answer would of been, either answer would have hurt her. It always gets complicated when friends ask you what you think of them as girlfriend/boyfriend material.

The next two girls were really dull and boring. I swore the third one was a lesbian as she was staring at the legs of the next girl the whole time I was talking to her. Then I reached the next table. I sat down, staring at her intently. I swore I knew her from somewhere.

"Hi, I'm Cathleen Taylor." She smiled, shaking my hand. _That's where!_ I stared at her wavy black hair then looked into her crystal blue eyes. _Holy Shit! She's sending love letters to my boyfriend saying she loves him and now she's going speed dating with complete strangers? _"Do you have a name?" Cathleen asked with a sweet smile.

"Um... Greg." I remembered.

"Hi Greg, nice to meet you." She smiled widely. _Damn! Why does she have to be so pretty? _If Nick did remember who she was he'd leave me in a second. "Greg, are you okay?"

"Uh huh." I nodded slightly, feeling my skin boiling under the pressure. "So um... what do you do?"

"I'm a Criminal Lawyer. How about yourself?"

"I work at the... the er... the... Crime Lab." I remembered.

"Really? Here in Las Vegas?" I nodded. "Wow, you know I used to date someone from there." _I know! He's my boyfriend! _"Nick Stokes, you know him? We were together a while, even before he got married to that Scarla."

I snickered slightly. "Star-la. Yeah I know him. They're having a baby together now."

"Really? I never thought they were a very good couple."

"Me either... but he seems to love her." I lied so she wouldn't try to get back with him. "So how long exactly have you known Nick?"

"A while... he was going to marry me before he met that Starla woman."

"Marry you?" I asked, trying not to sound completely jealous. "When was the last time you saw him?"

"Oh... years back now. It's a shame he's having babies with Starla now. I would have loved to have housed his children."

That was it! My final breaking point.

I stormed straight out of there. Not even bothering to go on the rest of the speed dates. Mandy ran after me in her high heels up the street. "Greg! Greg! Could you please slow down! These heels aren't meant for running!" She shouted. I stopped long enough to let her catch up with me. "Was that her? That Cathleen woman you asked me to look up."

"Yes." I mumbled angrily.

"So you _are_ in love with Nick?"

"Mandy!"

"Who am I gonna tell? I swear, I'm not gonna blackmail you. Just tell me the truth." She stopped me from walking, staring up into my eyes. "C'mon Greg, I'm not judgemental, my sisters a lesbian for god's sake. Just tell me the truth."

"Yes... yes I am in love with Nick."

"Ooh Greg." She sighed softly. "Does he know how you feel about him?" I couldn't expose Nick's secret to her so I shook my head. "So did that Cathleen talk about Nick then?"

"Yes."

"Is that why you're upset. I'm sorry sweetie but Nick's known as a ladies' man, I don't think you have a chance."

"Thanks for your support." I stepped around her continuing to walk on.

"Wait! I didn't mean it like that!" She shouted, running after me again. "Greg! Greg wait! I drove you here and you're in the middle of nowhere!" She reminded me. I stopped walking, allowing her to catch up again. "Thank you. You know he might be using all these women as beards. You could be the one true love of his life?" She suggested.

"You really think so?"

"How could someone _not_ love you Greg? You're sweet, sensitive and adorable. I mean... I've had a crush on you for years."

"You have?"

"Yeah." She nodded. "So you're hung up on Nick?" I nodded stuffing my hands into my pockets. "Why don't you tell him? If I told you earlier that I liked you, would you have gone out with me... no wait, don't answer that?"

"Course I would Mandy." I nodded. "You deserve somebody better than me though."

"So do you Greg . . . you deserve somebody great." She said softly, linking arms with me again, walking off towards her car. "Maybe you should tell Nick how much you love him . . . I've seen the way he looks at you. There's definitely something there between you two."

"Really think so?"

"Once you fall for Greg, you stay fallen." She assured me.

* * *

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	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter Twenty Eight:**

"Hey, I'm breathing. Hey, I'm bleeding. Hey, I'm screaming. Scum of the earth! Come on!" I bellowed out with my music in the background, while I was sat on the sofa with my laptop. "Hey, I'm breathing. Hey, I'm bleeding. Hey, I'm screami..." I looked round as the music suddenly stopped playing, seeing Nick had stopped it as he came in through the door. "Hey, I was singing that." I pouted.

"I noticed. I could hear you in the elevator from the third floor G." He laughed.

"How'd Starlas doctor's appointment go?" I asked, setting down my laptop on the coffee table to lunge into a hug with Nick.

"Okay." He smiled, welcoming me with open arms. "It was louder there then you're singin'." He teased me. I rolled my eyes, burying my face in his chest. "I got another picture though." He pulled it out of his pocket to show me. "There's the legs, that's an arm . . . and that's the heart beat." He pointed out on the picture.

"Cool, your baby's no longer a mutant." I teased.

Nick rolled his eyes, kissing the top of my head. "It never looked like a mutant G." He laughed. "What have you been doin' . . . besides singin' that is." He pulled out of my arms, heading over to the fridge.

"I looked up the meaning of my surname. It means defender of man and it's a Greek name. Yours is Anglo-Saxon and it means trunk of a tree."

"Huh." He looked at me curiously then broke into a wide grin. "So you're a defender of man . . . and I'm a tree?" He laughed, shaking his head as he grabbed a beer from the fridge. "Whaddya do with Mandy then?"

"Not much."

"What's that smell?" He asked walking towards the oven. I stopped him before he opened it, standing in the way so he couldn't look inside.

"It's a surprise and you're home right on time. You have just enough time to get changed for dinner." I smiled up at him.

Nick looked at the table seeing it was all set. "Are you plannin' a date with me Greg?"

"Kinda . . . technically we haven't really had one and I was bored so I decided to experiment with a steak dish. Why are you smiling like that? I can be romantic." I frowned at him, folding my arms across my chest.

"I know you can G. I've just never had someone give me a surprise date before." He smiled then started to kiss me passionately.

"What changes did Starla want to make then?" I asked him.

"Nothin', let's not bother about this now G." He shut me down again, pressing a kiss to my cheek. "So how much time exactly do I have?"

"Now . . . eight minutes." I checked against the timer.

"Only eight, I'll hurry." He snatched a kiss before he hurried off down to the bathroom to brush his teeth and shave while I continued to prepare the dinner, putting my music back on a little quieter this time.

Nick soon emerged from the bathroom with a few minutes to spare, rushing off to the bedroom to get changed. I just started to serve up dinner as he came out in a hot blue buttoned down shirt and tight jeans that showed off the beautiful curves of his body where as I was in ripped jeans and a plain black t-shirt, _maybe I shoulda dressed up a little more!_

I grabbed us some more beers from the fridge as I brought dinner to the table, watching the bright smile on Nick's face. "Mmmm, that smells delicious. What's it called?"

"Fire Flank Steak, it's glazed with whiskey and hot chilli powder." I sat down beside him watching his smile only increasing. "What?"

"Nothin' . . . just I love you G." He pressed a kiss to my cheek then grabbed for his beer. "I noticed there's rose petals all over the bed too. You plannin' on gettin' lucky?" He asked slowly licking his upper lip.

"No, that's for you... later you'll find out." I smiled at him as he took his first bite of his steak. He stared into my eyes as he ate then gave me the thumbs up as his eyes started to water. "To hot for yah Tex?"

"Just a bit, that's delicious though." He grabbed for his beer to water down his throat. "What's all this in aid of then?"

"Do I need a reason to spoil my boyfriend?" I asked.

"No . . . you know if it wasn't for the heavy metal in the background... this would be a perfect date." He smiled.

"The music comes with the Greg Sanders package." I smirked. "I have to put up with your controlling OCD, so I'm sure you can put up with my music and erotic fantasies." I rasped. His cheeks immediately blotched red as he gulped his next bite of food down. I could tell by his expression that he was wondering what I had planned for afters. I wouldn't tell him just yet. _I'd let him suffer a little longer. _I cheekily grinned to myself, enjoying the rest of the meal with him.

We made our way through the main course talking about his case he was working then I cleared the table, leading him by the hand off towards the bedroom, feeling his hands shaking as I led him inside. _He'd soon find out he had no reason to be afraid. _"You can strip down to your boxers and lie on your stomach." I instructed, climbing across the bed towards the stereo. I set up the instrumental track I picked just for this occasion, 'Nine Inch Nails song The four of us are dying' and it's not too heavy metal so Nick wouldn't hate it.

"What are we doing here G?" He nervously asked, pulling his jeans off.

"Back massage." I smiled, presenting him with the oils. "You didn't think I was gonna force yah to do something else did yah?" I sweetly chuckled.

"I don't know. You kept talking about erotic fantasies at the table." He chuckled then dove onto his stomach as instructed. "You actually have peaceful music?" He asked surprised as it started playing.

"This is by Nine inch nails; I spent all day looking for something that would work." I smirked, straddling his thighs as I began to work the massaging oils into his back.

"Thank you Greg." He rested his head on his arms, finally starting to relax.

"You're welcome Nicky."

"You really spent your day thinkin' up this date with me?"

"Yeah! Don't act too surprised. You should know by now I'm crazy about you. I was supposed to be sleeping for the switch around, but I got caught up." I watched a gorgeous smile spreading across Nick's lips.

"You know this music isn't so bad."

"Told yah. You'll be completely relaxed for your shift tonight."

"My shifts not for another four hours G."

"There's plenty of relaxation on the way though." I chuckled softly as I continued to massage the strong muscles on his back with my light fingertips. "Are you comfortable?"

"Perfectly." He purred. I gently began to knead my knuckles into his lower back, slowly making my way up towards his shoulders. "Where'd you learn to back massage so good G?"

"I've been researching and I've had a lot of practice over the years."

"You did a lot of research for this date, huh?" He smiled round at me.

"You're totally worth it though Nick." I continued the soothing back massage for a further few minutes until Nick was completely relaxed.

"What's up next?" He excitedly asked, rolling onto his back.

"Me and..." I uncovered a hidden box of strawberries, watching Nick's eyes trying to figure it out. "Be right back." I stole a kiss as I scrambled off the bed to retrieve the melted chocolate and cream I made earlier for this very special occasion.

Nick smiled widely as I entered the room again. "You're so romantic G." I set down the bowls on the side, being pulled onto the bed by Nick. He lifted my t-shirt up over my head then slid down my jeans and boxers, tossing them over his shoulder. He removed his own boxers, blanketing my naked body with his own as he kissed me passionately, weaving his fingers through my hair.

Nick poured a small amount of the chocolate sauce on my chest, sliding a strawberry through it then took a bite. He kissed me with the chocolate coated strawberry in his mouth so I could taste it right off his tongue.

Nick had his fill of strawberries then started licking the chocolate and cream from my chest with his warm tongue. He sucked the chocolate off my fingertips then returned to my mouth, pressing his body against me as he deepened his kiss. He soon found himself a condom and some lube, turning me on my side to loosen me up before he made passionate love to me, dispensing lusty chocolaty kisses across my shoulders.

We melted against each other as our highs washed over us, feeling one another's love for each other as our bodies moved together as one.

We soon found ourselves gasping for breath as the pure ecstasy surged through our bodies.

Nick immediately lifted me in his arms once he caught his breath, carrying me off towards the shower to cool us down. "Mmmm, thank you so much for that Greg. You truly are the best boyfriend ever." Grinning widely through lusty kisses as his hands caressed my body he continued to express his thanks. "I love you so much Greg."

"I love you too." I almost felt like crying because I was so happy, luckily we were under the shower spray so he couldn't tell as a few tears spilled their way from my eyes, otherwise he'd think I'm completely sappy.

* * *

"Hey Greg?" Nick shouted from the bedroom where he was getting ready for work.

"Yeah?" I shouted back while I was brushing my teeth stood in front of the mirror with nothing but a towel on around my waist. I realised I had been staring into space since I got out the shower, non stop thinking about Nick. My first real date with him and it was the most romantic thing I've ever done or experienced with anyone.

"Did you iron any of my shirts?" He asked stood in the bathroom doorway topless.

"Yep, I hung some in the guest room in case we got chocolate on them."

"Thank you." He head back off down the hall, returning a few minutes later with it over his shoulders.

"I do it okay?"

"Perfectly." He smiled. "Starla never ironed my shirts." He pressed a kiss to my cheek then started buttoning his shirt up, admiring how straight it was. "Hey G, don't make plans for Friday."

"Why?"

"I'm gonna take _you_ out on a date. We'll go see that 'Alone in the Dark' movie then I'll take you out to dinner."

"Okay." I smiled at him, trying to contain my excitement. I didn't plan a date in public since I thought he wouldn't be comfortable around me, _but clearly he is if it's his idea. _I rinsed my mouth out, dropping my toothbrush to the side then turned to face him. "Do I get a kiss before you go?"

"One kiss." He warned me. "Anythin' more and I'll never leave." I nodded innocently, stepping closer towards him. Nick pulled me closer into his arms, pressing his lips softly to mine. I closed my eyes as he swirled his tongue around in my mouth, feeling his hands running down my back to pull me closer. "That's it." He gasped pulling back from me. "I gotta go." He abruptly pulled back, looking into my eyes. "I'll see you later okay." I nodded then watched him go, relicking my lips so I could still taste him. He returned within seconds with a wide smile on his face. "Did I mention that I love you?"

"Yes." I nodded. He stepped closer to me to snatch another kiss. "You've totally fallen for me Nicholas Stokes." I chuckled as he couldn't leave me.

"Well you are _the _greatest person I have ever met. And I totally have fallen for you Greg Sanders; completely head over heels." He smiled widely, removing the towel wrapped around my waist, dropping it to the bathroom floor. "I love you . . . every inch of you." He rasped, raking my naked body with hungry eyes. I closed my eyes as he engaged in another ravenous kiss, feeling his hands softly caressing my body.

Nick slowly pulled back, looking deep into my eyes. "I gotta go, I love you."

"I love you too." Nick smiled widely as he made his way out the bathroom. I retrieved my towel from the bathroom floor, rewrapping it around my hips before I started to shave. I looked in the mirror realising my fears of things getting worse probably wasn't going to come true since they were only getting better and better. _But there was still the matter of Cathleen Taylor!_

To keep myself awake I did some more ironing while I danced around to some of my music then crashed on the sofa to play some computer games. Nick wouldn't call it very constructive, but I completed another few tournament races from 'Need For Speed 2' and bought myself a new car; the Lotus Espirit V8. _How cool would I look if I really bought one? I know for a fact Nick would look sexy as hell behind the wheel of that thing._

I quickly climbed to my feet as the phone started ringing, turning the volume down on the TV so I could hear them. "Sanders."

"_Do you answer every phone like that sweetheart?" _My mother chuckled.

"Professional habit, do you always have to moan how I answer the phone?"

"_Yes. Do you answer a lot of phones working in the lab then?"_

"Yes. All the time." I lied, leaning back against the counter. "What are you calling me for? I'm terribly busy."

"_Yeah right! I know for a fact you have the day off so you're probably sat in front of the TV playing computer games." _She chortled. "_I know you too well honey."_

"Am not!" I protested. "I've been doing ironing and spring cleaning."

"_I'll believe that the day I see it." _She laughed again.

"Is there something you want?" I asked as she was insulting me again.

"_Don't get snippy with me Gregory. I just thought I'd let you know that we're still in town, staying in a hotel and you're father and I have decided to move up here."_

"Seriously? But why?"

"_We want to be closer to our beautiful little boy."_

"I'm almost thirty. Now is the time I don't want my parents around me."

"_Oh don't be such a spoil sport. We've already been looking at places; think we've found the perfect one so we'll be around when you and Nick start having babies."_

"Whoa! We're having babies? Since when? We've been dating less than two weeks."

"_Six months dating then one of yah pops the question for marriage then a further six months before you start having babies. By my calculations I'll have a junior Greg about..."_

"Mom!" I shouted, interrupting her. "Whoever said we're getting married or having kids? I don't know if you noticed but we're both guys and Nick's already done the marriage thing."

"_He was married to the wrong person then. You'll see. Oh and we've got to meet for lunch sometime, I already told Nicky, he said he'd let me know when the two of you weren't busy. I'd love your father to officially meet him face to face to see what he's like around you. You're fathers very excited about meeting him too."_

"You'll embarrass me in front of him."

"_No I won't sweetheart. I'll do nothing of the sort. I don't know where you get these ideas in your head..."_

"Past experience."

"_I'll behave, I promise. Your fathers definitely going to be there any way, he can stop me before I say anything. You and your father are going to get along now aren't you?"_

"We never didn't get along. So dad knows that I'm... and he's okay with it?"

"_He's getting used to the idea._ _I just meant that you haven't seen each other a whole lot since you left for college and you barely spoke to each other at the wedding. You can't blame him for the break up sweetheart."_

"He's the one that had the affair."

"_True, he did. But that was years ago sweetheart. He's different now. We barely left the bedroom our whole..."_

"Mother! I don't need to know that." I cringed.

"_I wasn't going to give you the details. I didn't ask for the details with you and Nicky so I wouldn't give you any on my reignited sexual relati..." _I quickly pulled the phone away from my ear before she did share the details.

"Bye mom, I gotta go." I quickly hung up, setting the phone down on the side again. _I can't let her have lunch with me and Nick. I can't let her move out here either; she'll be in my face all the time! _I'll have to talk to my dad, get him to change his mind about it.

I got a text from Nick an hour later saying he'd be late as he was working a double shift so I decided to do some more research on Cathleen Taylor. So I went to the one person who Nick talked to about every woman he ever slept with.

"What?" Warrick asked. "Talk louder Greg." _Maybe you could hear me if you didn't have some woman's tongue in your ear! _I called Warrick to go out for drinks with him and he decided to bring two dates along. I didn't actually catch their names; they've been groping and kissing him all night.

"I said, do you remember Nick ever going out with a woman called Cathleen Taylor."

Warrick pursed his lips as he tried to think. "I don't know Sanders, what's the deal anyway? You got the hots for Nick now?" The two girls on him looked at me strangely.

"No, I just wanted to know."

Warrick shrugged taking a swig of his beer."I don't know, it's hard to keep up with Nick's dates. What's she do?"

"Criminal lawyer."

"What does she look like?" Warrick asked right before the blonde beside him stuck her tongue down his throat.

"Black wavy hair and crystal blue eyes. She's got really long legs... and a killed smile."

"What? Are you in love with her?" He laughed just as the blonde forced her tongue into his mouth again. I leant back in my seat waiting for them to stop, feeling oddly awkward as I watched Warrick getting it on with two girl's right in front of me.

Once Warrick came up for air he nodded. "Oh yeah, she was the married woman he had an affair with. They were seeing each other for a while before her husband found out or something. He threatened to tell Starla if they didn't stop."

_She's married and she's going speed dating?_ "And did they?"

"What do you care anyway Greggo? You doing a little project on all the women that Nick's slept with?" _No, that list is far too long! _"They haven't seen each other in a year. I think Cathleen and her husband moved off to New York or something to start over. That answer your question."

"Yeah." I nodded.

"Want me to introduce you to one of the ladies?" Warrick asked.

"Hi, I'm Precious." The red head smiled sat next to him. "You're friends really cute Warrick."

"C'mon Greggo, stay for a few drinks." Warrick suggested.

"No thanks . . . I gotta go." _Crawl into bed with Nick and stop obsessing over Cathleen and Nick's past._

* * *

I crept through the apartment towards the bedroom, seeing Nick fast asleep under the covers. I pulled my sneakers and jeans off then threw my t-shirt over the end of the bed, crawling in beside him. "Greg?" He murmured softly as I cuddled closer to him.

"It's me Nicky, shh go back to sleep." I kissed him on forehead then pressed angel kisses to his eyelids.

"You smell like Budweiser." He noted without opening his eyes.

"Good job CSI Stokes." I chuckled, resting my head on his chest. "Did you miss me?"

"Very much." Nick circled his arms around me, holding me tightly.

"Hey Nicky." I whispered. As he was fast asleep I decided to question him as he won't remember it in the morning. "Do you remember Cathleen Taylor?"

"Who?" He sleepily mumbled.

"Apparently you had an affair with her while you were with Starla." Nick just sighed heavily, putting his arm around me tighter. "She said you were gonna marry her." I softly poked him trying to wake him up.

"I never wanted to marry anyone G. Go to sleep."

_This was useless. _I decided to close my eyes, falling asleep as I listened to the soft beat of his heartbeat as I soundly slept in his arms.

A few hours later Nick started shaking me. "G..." He poked me, waking me up properly. "Door." He simply said then fell asleep again.

I sat up slightly hearing someone knocking at the door, realising what he meant. _How lazy is he? He could have answered the door!_

I lifted Nick's arm off me, grabbing some jeans as I made my way off towards the front door. I slid the burglar chain from the lock then slowly pulled it open towards me, looking out at the posh looking people stood in my doorway.

I blinked my eyes sleepily a few times then realised where I knew them from. _Nick's parents! Oh my God! _"Mr and Mrs Stokes." I smiled out at them. Judge Stokes looked at my bare chest then up into my eyes. "Sorry, I was asleep." I looked around for a sweatshirt or something, but I could only see Nick's A&M sweatshirt _and I couldn't wear that in front of his parents now could I_? I dug through the laundry basket, pulling a t-shirt down over my head then ushered them into the apartment. "Are you looking for Nick?"

"Yes." They both nodded together, looking around the apartment. I quickly checked around for anything incriminating against Nick's new lifestyle too, relieved that there wasn't anything.

"I'll um... I'll just go get him." _From my bed. _Oh God. I smiled at them sweetly, heading down the hall to my room. I knocked on the door then slowly walked in, clicking it shut behind me. "Nick. Nick." I whispered, poking him in the chest.

"Go to sleep baby."

"No, no Nicky. Wake up." I softly shook him, watching him rubbing his eyes open.

"What's up?"

"Um... your parents are here." I tried to break it to him gently.

"My..." He looked at me confused.

"Your parents. C'mon get up. They're waiting for you." I insisted, waving my hands about. Nick looked at me still shocked then quickly scrambled off the bed, heading for the door. "Wa-wa-wait." I grabbed his wrist before he disappeared out the door. "Getting dressed would be advised." I pointed down to his naked body.

"Oh." Nick stumbled over to the closet, grabbing some jeans and a t-shirt; he smoothed his hair flat then nervously walked out into the hall. I quickly head out the room, heading across the hall to the guest room so they wouldn't suspect.

While Nick talked to his parents in the front room, I leant against the closed door trying to listen, but these doors are really soundproof! _I couldn't hear a thing. _I did hear the front door shut a few minutes later, almost falling through the guest room door as Nick suddenly pulled it open while I was still leant against it. I crashed against his body, almost sending us both toppling to the ground.

Nick stood me up straight with a curious smile on his face. "Were you ease droppin' G?"

"No." I smiled innocently, taking a step back. "Well I tried . . . but I couldn't hear anything. What did they want?"

"They were in town, they wanted to drop by and see me. We're goin' out to dinner at the end of the week." He nervously shoved his hands in his pockets, without looking up at me.

"You are?" I asked shocked that he forgot he made plans with me.

"Oh . . . yeah about the movie, we can catch it another day right?"

"Uh huh." I nodded, shoving my hands in my pockets too. "Um Nick... you are aware your flies are undone, right? And you're commando."

Nick immediately blushed bright red. I could tell he was hoping his parents hadn't seen. He quickly did them up, sighing a heavy deep breath. "Damn it, I should go." _Where? _I asked myself completely confused at his sudden rejection towards me. He stepped past me heading off to the bath. "G . . . so are we cool about the date?"

"Sure." I nodded, watching him disappearing into the bathroom. _Less than two minutes with his parents and he was already freaking out about us again. _Not like I was excited about us seeing a movie together then going to dinner or anything. _I mean it was only our first real date together in public. _I'm not that bothered.

_Yes I am!_

I sighed heavily as I returned to my room, pulling my jeans off then dove back under the covers that were still warm. _I hope this freak out doesn't last until he's had dinner with his parents at the end of the week. _He was just starting to get used to me. After a quick visit from his parents he couldn't even look at me.

Nick returned to the bedroom a few minutes later, grabbing some socks and shoes. "Where are you going?" I asked him.

"I need to go for a walk." I watched as he tied his laces seeing his hands were trembling. I crawled across the bed to where he was sitting, kneeling down beside him. "I'm sorry, I just need some air G."

"Nicky, what's up?"

"I love you Greg, I just need some air." He turned round to look at me, pressing a kiss to my forehead. "I'm comin' back though." He climbed to his feet then grabbed a jacket. He still couldn't look me in the eyes as he made his way out the door.

I threw myself back against the pillow, holding my hands over my eyes. _I hope he does come back._

I spent the day alone, waiting for Nick to come back. I tried to call him but it went straight through to his voicemail every time. He stayed out for ten whole hours, completely ignoring me.

_Ten hours! Oh Crap! _I quickly sat up looking round at the time. I was late for my therapist's session. I quickly scrambled off the bed pulling some clothes on then grabbed my shoes as I ran off towards the elevator.

I ran outside, quickly climbing into my car driving off across town to the doctor's office. I parked outside then ran into the doctor's office, seeing him waiting in the lobby with an angry expression on his face.

"Mr Sanders." Doctor Vincent grumbled. "Late again. Maybe we should change your appointment time?"

"No, this times fine."

"But you're never on time." He pulled open his office door, ushering me inside. "Gemma, cancel my next appointment." He informed his assistant as he walked with me inside. "Why don't you take a seat Greg?" He pulled my thick file from his cabinet, sitting down behind his desk. "Remember Greg, talk slow, in sentences... and stay on topic." He warned me.

I nodded taking a deep breath then started talking about everything on my mind. Forty five minutes later Doctor Vincent snapped my file shut loudly.

"Okay Greg, I think that's enough for today."

"I still have fifteen minutes."

"My pens run out." He pointed out to me. "And I'm out of paper again."

"You didn't help me again though . . . Nick completely ignores me after he's been with straight people that don't know he's gay."

"Greg, your hours up." He tapped his watch in annoyance.

"But you haven't answered a single one of my questions."

"In all fairness Greg. You haven't given me a chance to. You've been talking nonstop since you stepped through the door. My advice to you on about... thirty two percent of your issues . . . Talk. To. Nick." He spelled out to me.

I looked at him a moment, chewing on my lower lip. "Which thirty two percent?"

"I'll leave you to figure that out yourself Greg. You can tell me how it pans out next session." He ushered me off to the door, relieved that my session with him was finally over.

_Do therapists actually want to help you? Which thirty two percent was I supposed to talk over with Nick? _I climbed into my car, driving off to the first set of traffic lights.

_This is going to be impossible!_

Suddenly a car slammed into the side of mine.

I flinched from the shock, struggling with my seatbelt as the blacked out car reversed back to take another shot at me. They reversed back then slammed into the side of my car again at a great force, smashing the whole driver's side up.

I pulled my seatbelt off, struggling over to the passenger's side as blood poured down the side of my face and my arm. I forced the door open falling onto the pavement below as they rammed into my car again and again.

I struggled away on my elbows feeling dizzy from the blow to my head. The car suddenly sped off down the road, leaving me with my wrecked car on the side of the road.

* * *

**Cliffe...**

**I'm almost done with the next chapter I just gotta read through it again and check it so you won't have to wait too long to find out what happens next...**

**Please Review**


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter Twenty Nine:**

"Ouch!" I moaned. The nurse gave me an apologetic look as she continued to stitch my arm up. I had three stitches to the side of my head and six in my forearm along with sore ribs and lots of cuts and bruises everywhere. My car was totally wrecked, but then again I was going to buy a new one anyway so I'm not completely bothered.

"There we go. The cops want pictures of the wounds before I bandage it for you and I'll get the doctor to check you over before you can leave." She spoke softly as she snapped her gloves off. "Be careful how you drive next time."

"I was parked." I remarked at her sarcastically. She gave me another apologetic look, heading off out the room just as Nick walked in.

"Greg! Are you okay?" He asked completely panicked.

"I'm fine." Nick looked at my head then my arm. "Nicky, honestly, I'm fine; it looks worse than it is."

"Who the hell did this to you?"

"I don't know."

Nick softly ran his fingertips down the side of my face, looking into my eyes. "You didn't see a car?"

"Blacked out SUV . . . I didn't see the plates." Nick looked over his shoulder at the door then sat on the bed beside me.

"You okay G. You're shakin'."

"Just a little shaken up . . . I wonna go home." I brushed my finger across the bruise on my chin, looking up at Nick. "So are you here for me . . . or in a professional manner?"

"Grissom sent me . . . but I came for you too Greg."

"Where'd you go?"

"I just needed some space." Nick retrieved his kit from outside my room, pulling his camera out.

"Why do you have to do it?" I asked as he started unloading everything he needed from his kit.

"Grissom sent me. Sara's lookin' at your car and O'Riley is talking to witnesses. I'll need your statement too." Nick set up his camera, looking at the cut on my arm.

"Is my case the most important tonight then?"

"It is to us Greg. I need to take pictures of your wounds." Nick raised the camera to his eyes, taking pictures of the stitches to my head then my arm. He wasn't treating me like his boyfriend or a friend; he was treating me like a victim on one of his usual cases.

Nick stayed while the nurse bandaged my arm up, along with my ribs, anxiously biting his bottom lip as he watched. The doctor checked me over for a concussion then issued me some pain killers.

Nick waited for the doctor to leave before he packed up his kit. "You want me to drive you home?" He asked, without looking at me directly still which was really starting to annoy me. What could I have possibly done wrong to deserve this?

"Who did you need space from?" I asked curiously. "Me?"

"No... this has nothin' to do with you." Nick snapped his kit shut, lifting it into his hands. "You want me to take you home or not?"

"I'll grab a taxi." I grabbed my jacket off the end of the bed, carefully climbing of the bed as my ribs started to cause me some pain.

"C'mon. I'll drive you on my way back to the lab."

"Are you gonna avoid me forever?"

"I'm not avoidin' you Greg." I looked round at him seeing he still couldn't look me in the eyes. "C'mon." Nick walked me round to the parking lot, carefully helping me into the passenger seat of his car. He drove in silence back to our apartment, pulling up in the parking lot. "Want me to help you upstairs?"

"Nope, I got it." I winced, climbing out of the truck. Nick ignored me and came up with me anyway. He helped me off to the bedroom, sitting me down on the edge. I watched as he pulled my sneakers off then lifted the covers for me to lie down.

"I'm not avoidin' you Greg." He repeated, softly pressing a kiss to my forehead. "I'll be back later, call if you need me."

"Will you pick up this time?" I shouted after him before he left.

"Yes I will." He assured me, appearing in the doorway again. "I love you Greg, we'll find whoever did this to yah." I watched him leave, listening out for the click of the front door. I had a theory of who did it already, I just wasn't sure.

Nick never did come home at the end of the day. I called him but it went straight to his voicemail again so I called Sara to get an update on the case.

"_Sidle."_

"Sara, it's Greg."

"_Greg, how you doing?" _She asked surprised. "_I saw the pictures of your injuries, they look pretty bad. Are you okay?"_

"Give me a chance to answer Sidle." I chuckled, wincing from the pain in my ribs. "I'm okay. So have you got any further on my case?"

"_I'm not allowed to discuss it with you Greg."_

"Oh c'mon Sara. I have the right to know who tried to kill me. Just in case I decide to invite them over for lunch or something."

"_Okay . . . you can't tell Ecklie or Grissom though." _She warned me. "_The owner of the SUV is one Dean Clark."_

"Ryan's brother?" I blurted. "He tried to kill me?"

"_Who's Ryan?"_

"Ask Nick. I gotta go."

"_Greg! Don't do anything. We can handle this!" _I snapped my phone shut ignoring her, wincing as I climbed out of bed.

* * *

I pounded hard on the front door again and again, holding my ribs in agony still. Rita finally opened the door looking out at me. "You! What do you want?" She barked.

"So you can't win your case to get your son out of jail so instead you try and have me killed?" I shouted at her angrily.

"We are going to win the case and I did no such thing!"

"Really? Do you have any idea what kinda person your son is? He's not the angel you make him out to be."

"You'd know!" She huffed, folding her arms across her chest.

"Yes I do. I tried to leave your son, he resorted to blackmailing, assault and he almost raped me, but I still saved his life."

"Why should I believe you?"

"I have a hard enough time lying to my mother that I'm not working in the field." She chomped on her bottom lip as she stared at me intently. "I'm not some vial monster that turns men gay like you think. Ryan's first time was when he was fourteen with his school gym teacher. He's always been into guys. He came onto me. People warned me about him... but I still went with him."

"Why should I believe you?" She asked again.

"Because you know your son. Deep down you've always known what he's like." _Yes I'm voicing my mother. _"I realise you're trying to protect your son just like any mother would, but he needs serious help. He drove all the way to LA where I was at my mother's wedding to try and force himself on top me. I saved his life when he almost drowned then your other son tried to kill me." I explained to her, watching the blood draining from her face.

"I'd like you to leave now." She said as a tear gently rolled down her cheek.

Before I could say anything else she closed the door on me. I slowly turned around, seeing Nick and O'Riley arriving with two other officers.

"Sanders, what are you doing here?" O'Riley asked.

"Nothing." I lied, walking down the garden path. Nick still couldn't look at me. I shoved my hands in my pockets walking off back home. I wondered what I could have possibly done wrong to make him ignore me like this.

"Gregory!" A voice shouted from behind me. I looked round as my Mom pulled up in her car, frantically tooting her horn. "Oh thank goodness." She jumped out the car, throwing her arms around me. "I went to the lab and saw pictures of you all over one of the layout tables and no one would tell me what's going on..."

"Ouch! Mom, you're crushing my sore ribs."

"Sorry." She pulled back from me, checking over the cut on my head.

"How'd you know where to find me?

"Well I looked up the address of Rita Clark. I knew you'd go and see her if her son tried to kill you. Then I saw Nicky's car outside so I just kept driving to look for you."

"How'd you know I'd go to Rita's?"

"Because I'd do it too." She smiled softly. "So, what did she say?"

"She told me to leave. Mom stop fussing. I'm fine." I pushed her away as she kept looking over the cuts and bruises on me.

"You're not fine, you're not smiling. I know you're not happy. What's the matter sweetheart?"

"I think I've lost my boyfriend." I sighed heavily, stuffing my hands into my pockets.

"What? Nicky, why?"

"I don't know . . . he won't talk to me."

"In the car now." She instructed, pulling open the passenger side door. "Don't make me drag you Gregory." I reluctantly climbed into the car, carefully pulling my seatbelt down over my shoulder. She drove me back to her hotel room, fixing me a four course snack while she talked my ears off about her wedding.

"Sweetheart, I keep waiting for you to talk to me about what's going on, but it's pretty obvious that you're not going to, so I'm just gonna have to ask." She sat down in front of me, looking into my eyes. "What's going on with you and Nicky? You're both so miserable and completely not yourselves."

"Nick hasn't talked to me since his parents came over."

"His parents?"

"Yes, he's not Jesus, he does have parents." I remarked. She rolled her eyes at me, slapping the back of my hand. "Think it has something to do with Starla too."

"That's the ex-wife, right?"

"Technically, they're still married. She won't let him divorce her until they've got this baby mess sorted out." I explained to her.

"You know there's some great lawyers on the P-FLAG community."

"Mom, she won't let him have any part of the baby's life is she finds out he's gay. Where's dad anyway?"

"Meeting with realtors, we're looking at places tomorrow." She climbed to her feet pouring us out some coffee. "Do you want me to call Nicky? Let him know where you are?"

"No, he doesn't care. And he won't answer."

"I'll try anyway."

"Mom!" I moaned, but she was already dialling. I winced as I climbed to my feet, snapping her phone shut in her hand. "The thing about Nick is when he's angry or ignoring you, you have to let him cool off or he'll never talk to me again."

"You're not gonna fight for him?" She asked shocked.

"Should I have to? I've got stitches in my head and arm, I'm covered in bruises and I can't stop my hands from shaking." I shouted at her. "Why should I have to fight for him?"

"Oh sweetheart." I pushed her away, heading off out the door. "Greg honey!" She shouted after me as I head off towards the elevator. I leant against the wall as it took me down, pulling my pain killers out from my pocket, I threw two back then hailed a taxi.

I returned back to my apartment, still finding it empty. _Still no Nick._ I crashed back onto the bed, wincing from my ribs. I tried to ring Nick again but it went straight through to his voicemail _again_. _He completely lied to me again!_

Over the next few hours I lay in bed in agony from my ribs. Nick had been gone a further eight hours and still no word. Technically speaking I was supposed to start work in an hour. Today was the day I was meant to go back.

I couldn't stand waiting around the apartment any more so I staggered down the hall to the bathroom, cleaning the blood off my body with a cloth before I got changed into some clean clothes.

I had to take a taxi into work, _obviously since I don't have a car anymore. _Nick's truck was still in the parking lot, but I couldn't find him anywhere in the lab.

"Greg, what are you doing here?" Grissom asked surprised.

"I don't wonna stay at home. I'm fine, I can still help." I insisted.

"Not while you're the victim of a case we're working you can't. You should go home Greg."

"I don't want to. C'mon, I'll help Wendy in the lab or something?"

"Actually..." Grissom looked down at his watch. "Ecklie and I need to speak with you over the incident that happened in LA. You can't work any cases until we've got this mess sorted out. So go and sit in the break room while I go and find Ecklie." He instructed.

I reluctantly head off for the break room, taking a seat on the sofa. A few minutes later Warrick came in. He smiled to me, pouring himself a coffee then sat down at the break room table. While he was reading through the file in front of him he kept glancing up at me concerned. His constant staring was starting to get on my nerves though.

"What?" I snapped at him.

"Nothing." He shook his head. "Just making an observation." He muttered, sipping his coffee.

"Observation about what?"

"You . . . I didn't think you ever got into trouble Greggo." He climbed off the chair, heading over to the sofa beside me. "I heard from Brass that this guy Ryan assaulted you down in LA and you were arrested." I nodded looking up at him through my eyelashes. "I told you your lifestyle will come back to bite you in the ass eventually there Greggo."

"You think he assaulted me because I'm gay?" I asked. Warrick nodded slightly. "It wasn't that kind of assault. The guy who assaulted me was gay too."

"Sanders!" Ecklie shouted from the hall, ushering me off towards his office.

I climbed to my feet, making my way off down the hall nervously as everyone was watching. I still hadn't seen Nick, _he really was avoiding me_.

"Grissom had to rush out, so it's just us." Ecklie informed me. "Take a seat Greg." He pointed to the empty seat in front of his desk. "Okay, first of all I'd just like to inform you that we will provide you with a psychiatrist if you need one. We're going to do a performance review..."

"What for?"

"It's all part of procedure Greg. We need to know that this hasn't affected your psychical performance in any way. Our priority is evidence collecting after all."

"This won't affect my ability to collect evidence. I can still do the job." I assured him.

"We'll see." He smugly replied.

"Is this about the LA incident or the one that happened yesterday?"

"Both . . . they're related. Okay, let's get started..."

* * *

Ecklie sent me home so I reluctantly returned, seeing Nick's truck in the parking lot. _Maybe nows my chance to talk to him finally?_

"Greg." Nick looked at me completely surprised as I walked in through the front door. He was sat on the sofa in front of the TV with a beer in his hands. "Where did you go?"

"Work." I muttered, kicking off my shoes then dropping my keys on the side.

"Why? They shoulda given you some time off."

"They did. They sent me home." I mumbled, walking off into the kitchen.

"Why?" Nick climbed to his feet, following after me. "Greg, why?"

"They think I can't do my job." I walked round to the fridge to grab a beer.

"You can't drink that with your pain killers." He warned me. I groaned setting it back down in the fridge. "They think you can't do your job? Why would they think that? You're a damn good CSI."

I nodded sitting up on the counter. "Apparently gay guys who are too pathetic to defend themselves can't do the job as good as everyone else."

"They actually said that to you."

"Not in those... exact words."

"Who said it?" He asked, leaning against the opposite counter.

"Ecklie . . . everyone else knows too. Maybe I should get a job in another country. How's New York this time of year?"

"You can't leave Greg. You've worked so hard for this job." Nick placed his hands on my knees, looking up into my eyes. "The lab wouldn't be the same without yah."

"What about you Nick?"

"What about me, what?"

"Would you still want me to be around . . . or have you gone off me completely?"

"I haven't gone off you Greg . . . I'm tryin' to think things through."

"About what? I thought you wanted to be with me."

"I do . . . my life's just a little complicated right now. I still love you. I'm just not sure what I want."

"I thought you said out of your double lives, the one with me was the one you wanted to keep?"

Nick leant back against the other counter, folding his arms across his chest. For what seemed an endless moment he remained silent. _If he really did want me, he wouldn't have to think this hard about it._

"Look Greg, I just need some time to think. Bein' with you was the greatest experience of my life. Back in LA it was just the two of us . . . that's how I want it to be, but I've got a wife who's withholdin' on our divorce, baby on the way and parents that are really disappointed in me for not bein' able to work things out with my marriage. I just don't have room in my life for you right now."

"Are you serious?" I asked completely shocked.

"Yes." He nodded, without looking at me still.

"Even after that big date I threw for you? You can still turn me down to please all these other people?"

"Greg, this isn't easy for me."

"It's not fucking easy for me either. You're a fucking liar Nick. Yesterday you were saying this thing with Starla and the baby will never come between us and now today you're fucking dumping me for her."

"Greg, I just can't do this with you right now. I'm sorry." Nick said then stormed out of the apartment again.

"Freaking People Pleaser." I mumbled after him. I jumped off the counter heading off to the couch. I still didn't understand why he would cut me out of his life if he supposedly still loves me.

* * *

**Please Review, I hope you liked it. Don't worry it's not over yet.**


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter Thirty:**

The next few days I barely saw him and when I did he made a break for the nearest door, avoiding eye contact with me. Grissom let me go back to work after they arrested Dean Clark for trying to kill me with his car.

Now it was time for the usual meeting with Doctor Vincent.

"Fucking Great Advice Doc!" I immediately shouted, heading into his office. "I talked some of my issues through with Nick and he decided to dump me!" I threw myself against his sofa cushions, folding my arms across my chest, wishing I hadn't done it so hard as my ribs were still aching.

Doctor Vincent looked at me a moment then grabbed for the phone to call his assistant. "Gemma, cancel my three o'clock."

"_Okay Doctor."_ Gemma replied.

Doctor Vincent turned over to a new sheet of paper, testing his pen worked before he told me to speak. "So..."

"Nick fucking told me there wasn't enough room for me in his life. He chose his stupid wife, mutant baby and the parents that don't even love him for who he is... how am I supposed to compete with that? The loyal loving boyfriend, who fucking made him dinner, gave him a back massage then the best sex of his life... but then again he could have been lying when he said that part too..."

"Greg, remember to breath." He cautioned me. "What did Nick actually say to you?"

"Word for word... he said his usual look Greg, I just need some time to think. He said that being with me _was_ the greatest experience of his life, past tense. But he probably fucking lied about that too. He said back in LA with me was perfect, because it was just the two of us..."

"Have you two been spending time together lately . . . alone time?"

"Lately no, he's avoiding me. Even at the apartment. When we got back from LA he only touched me when we were alone, let alone talked to me." I moaned, putting my feet up on the sofa. "I haven't seen him or spoken to him in six whole days . . . I don't even know where he sleeps anymore."

Doctor Vincent looked at me completely shocked. "Nick... Nick didn't talk to you unless you two were alone?"

"It was usually one word answers if other people were around. Four or five at the most. Like 'do you want some coffee?' That's the most he says to me inside an hour at work." I told him, looking up at the clock. "Now he can't even look at me."

"Greg, I think the first thing you need to do is relax . . . it's not the end of the world."

"Says you! You're not dating Nick . . . neither am I coz he dumped me. 'I just don't have room in my life for you right now', how could he say that to me?"

"Greg, you have to be reasonable here. Nick's just come out of the closet, right after he had a terrible break up with his wife, who is now pregnant . . . and he's a very traditional man, from a very strict background from the sounds of it." He informed me.

I stared at him blankly a moment then completely snapped. "Whose side are you on?"

"I'm not on anybody's side Greg . . . I'm trying to help you, but I think you have to be reasonable here, for Nick's sake."

"God! You love Nick so much, why don't you just go marry him?" I shouted storming out of his office.

* * *

"Greg." Stuart smiled surprised. He handed me one of the vodka shots in his hands, watching me shocked as I threw it back, grabbing the second one in his hand. "Ooh, rough night?" I nodded, sitting down on a bar stool to order a beer. Stuart watched me chugging back my beer then sat down beside me. "Okay Greg, I'm all ears. What's up?"

"I just got dumped."

"By Nick?"

I glared at him angrily. "Yes by Nick! I'm not dating anyone else." I chugged back my beer, ordering another one.

Stuart bought a whole bottle of tequila then dragged me off through the bar to a quiet area. "Greg this is my boyfriend Spencer. Spence we need some time alone babe, I'll talk to you in a minute." Stuart winked at him.

Spencer nodded walking off through the bar.

"I don't want to be an imposition." I told Stuart but he pushed me into the booth, sliding in the other side then poured me a shot of tequila.

"Get that down your neck and unload on me Greg."

"Are you sure? I piss my therapist off enough with all the crap that fills my head."

"I'm sure Greg. Talk to me." Then before I knew it I was telling him everything, including what Ryan did to me and how Nick defended me.

A few hours later I stumbled through my apartment front door, literally; just about managing to close it behind me before I passed out. "Greg." Nick's voice called out to me. I slowly rolled onto my back to look up at him, only my vision was blurred and his voice was completely muffled. He lifted me into his arms, carrying me off to my bed where I passed out again.

* * *

In the morning I found myself completely alone in bed . . . again, with a splitting headache. I struggled with the covers to climb out of bed and stumble down the hall to the bathroom before I puked my guts up in the hall. I dropped to my knees in front of the toilet, feeling my insides turning inside out on me.

"Greg, you okay?" Nick's voice called from the open door.

"I'm fine." I nodded, panting heavily. A few seconds later I heard the hiss of a soda can opening. Nick knelt down beside me, handing me the can of sprite. "Thanks."

"You're welcome." Nick almost watched as I chugged back the can of sprite. "What am I gonna do with you G?" He asked softly.

I moved round to sit against the wall, holding the cold can to my head as I tried to piece together what happened last night. "What do you care Nick?"

"Greg, I do care about you . . . I just need some space."

"This is the most you've spoken to me in a week." I moved the can to the other side of my head, looking up at Nick. "Where have you been sleeping?"

"Guest room."

"Why?"

Nick brushed his fingers through his hair as he tried to think. "Greg..."

"Do I mean anything to you Nick? Anything at all? How can you just block me out of your life? You say your life's too complicated right now, I never asked you to come all the way to Los Angeles to be with me, yet there you were. You were the one who wanted this. I planned that date because I thought you really loved me. I opened my heart to you and you shut me out just like that. Why me? Why did I draw the short straw?" I shouted angrily, starting to ramble.

"Hell hath no fury like Greg scorned." He joked then saw I wasn't laughing. "Greg, I told you when we first got together I couldn't be what you wanted."

"You wanted me too though. I know you did. Back in LA you were like a real boyfriend to me. Why did I get cut out of your life? If you did care about me you wouldn't hurt me like this. Your parents have only been in touch with you since the coffin. You and Starla have been cheating on each other so many times..."

"Whoa, Starlas cheated on me?"

"Most likely." I nodded, still protecting him from Warrick and Starlas affair. "How do you know this baby is even yours? You pick the parents that haven't talked to you in years, the bitchy wife that you married to blend in with your family and the mutant looking baby that might not even be yours, over me? Why?" I shouted at him, trying not to cry. "What the hell did I do wrong?"

"You complicate my life even more Greg."

"How? Why?" I asked on the verge of tears.

"Do you not see why? If I stay with you my parents and family will most likely disown me. Starlas not gonna let me have any part of this kids life if I'm sleepin' with a guy and who knows what will happen at work. I'm sorry Greg . . . I do love you. I wasn't lyin' when I told you that . . . I just can't be with you."

"What happened to I'm the greatest person you ever met and you're completely head over heels for me? How can you just turn off your feelings for me like that?" I shouted again, feeling my head only starting to get worse.

"Greg, you're not makin' this very easy for me."

"Good! Break ups aren't meant to be easy!" I yelled with tears running down the side of my face.

"Greg..."

"You won't have to worry about going to hell with the disgusting fag you slept with because you're already there buddy! With me you could have been happy; you're already in hell with your stupid mutant baby and cheating whore wife!" I struggled to my feet, dumping the soda can in the sink as I pushed past him.

"Greg wait!" He tried to stop me but I pulled out of his reach.

"You said the two days you spent with me in LA were the best in your life, yet you can give me up an instant! You know what Nick, you're a... you're a..." I spluttered trying to find the right words. "You're a Freaking Jerk!" I shouted then stormed off into my room, slamming the door shut.

_Real mature Greg! That's gonna get him back. _I scolded myself as I collapsed onto the bed.

_If there is some higher power at work here, I could really use another one of those magical miraculous signs right about now to show me the way. _I thought as I looked up at the ceiling, but it was pretty useless. I never believed in God before, why start now.

"Greg." Nick shouted a few seconds later, knocking on my door.

"What?" I spat back in an ill manner, wincing from my hangover.

"Can I come in?" He pleaded in a much calmer tone of voice.

"No . . . I'm just a disgusting fag, why would you wonna come in here?"

Nick pushed the door open to look at me. "Hey, that was your word, not mine. I never called you that . . . I would _never_ call you that Greg."

"No you were just thinking it, which is worse." I mumbled, putting my arm over my eyes so I didn't have to look up at him. "Go away Nick; I don't want to hear any more of your lies."

"Greg, I just said my life's a little complicated, _right now! _I-I'm sorry." He started to blubber. "I'm really sorry Greg . . . I know nothin' I say will ever take it back . . . just please hear me out . . . I just need to talk to you."

"Go ahead." I mumbled, still avoiding eye contact with him.

Nick walked over to the bed, sitting down beside me. "I didn't mean to say what I said, how I said it."

"How did you mean to say it?" I removed my arm from my eyes to look up at him, seeing the tears in his eyes. "Did you still mean to choose all of them over me? Why did you kiss me in the first place . . . you already knew about the baby and the divorce . . . why did you kiss me?" I demanded.

"You were there when I needed you . . . just like you always have been Greg. I know I hurt you, just like I did after the kiss . . . I don't want to keep hurtin' you but my life with you is complicated."

"How?" Nick kept quiet so I sat up to look him in the eyes. "How?" I repeated.

"My parents Greg . . . did you ever think about that?"

"Boo hoo Nick; you're thirty three years old. If I'm always there for you then why did I draw the short straw? What did I do wrong?"

"Nothin'." Nick sobbed, holding his hands over his eyes to stop the tears.

"Then why did you dump me?"

"I'm sorry . . . I don't understand these feelin's inside me. All I know is; I think you're the most beautiful person in the whole world . . . and that _was_ the best sex of my life, I wasn't lyin'."

"Now I know your lying." I smiled as he looked up at me.

"I'm not lyin' G."

"No, but how can I be the most beautiful person in the whole world. You're talking out of your arse there Nicholas Stokes."

Nick smiled slightly, brushing his fingers gently through my hair. "Greg you are beautiful." Nick sighed heavily then inched slightly closer. "I thought if I pushed you out it would be easier to do this."

"Do what?" Nick finally looked me right in the eyes. I felt warm tingles in my stomach as I was once again the object that those gorgeous beauties were focused on. "Push me out to do what?" I repeated.

"Those changes that Starla wanted to make," He paused looking back at me. "She wants me to prove I can be a good father to this child."

"So you pushed me out?" I asked confused.

"My parents want me to make it up with her and be a proper father to this baby and Starla wants me to prove myself."

"Nick, you don't always have to please other people. Is that why you pushed me out? Because I'm not on the blue prints of your life?" Nick smiled slightly to my reference. "Do you know what I want from you Nick?" He shook his head. "I want you to be happy. I don't care what you do, or how you do it. As long as you're happy . . . I'm happy."

Nick wiped the tears threatening to spill from his eyes then smiled looking up at me. "God I'm such an idiot Greg . . . how can I choose them over you?" He came to his senses.

"It took you eight seconds to decide that?"

"It's been a very revealin' eight seconds." He nodded. "I can't hurt you over them . . . I'm sorry you drew the short straw . . . never again."

"It must have been folded in half." I joked.

Nick smiled, pulling me into his arms for a warm hug. "I'm sorry for rejectin' you Greg. You shouldn't draw the short straw; you're the most important thing in my life." He whispered softly. "And you stink of vomit." He laughed softly.

"You should be used to it CSI Stokes."

"Not from my own boyfriend." I closed my eyes as his arms wrapped tighter around me. It was the first time he'd touched me in days and it felt heavenly. I never wanted him to let go. I never wanted to lose him again, but there were still obstacles in our path to stop us from reaching our happy ever after.

"You really wonna be my boyfriend again?" I whispered a few seconds later.

"Definitely." He rasped against my neck, raising my chin to brush the tears from my eyes with his soft fingertips. "If you'll have me that is . . . I'm so sorry I hurt you."

"You're not gonna chose them over me again are you?" I insecurely asked.

"Definitely not, because I love you. You were right . . . I am a people pleaser . . . I always have been." He admitted to me. "From now on though I only want to please you."

"Do you mean that?"

"Yes . . . I mean it . . . I've felt so lost without you. Even wakin' up alone feels weird." He pressed a kiss to my forehead, gently running his fingers across the gradually healing cut. "I shoulda been there to protect you. I promised I'd never let anyone hurt you, but I wasn't there for you."

"It's not your fault. It's Dean Clark's fault that his car repeatedly crashed into mine."

"Still... I wasn't there for you." He looked into my eyes again, tenderly brushing the tear away from under my eye. "Now you need a nice refreshing shower and a cup of coffee to treat that hangover of yours there G."

"Does the refreshing shower come free with a hunky Texan?" I asked, cheekily licking my lips. "Because I really have missed you."

"I know . . . me too . . . but you have to brush your teeth first." He pulled me to my feet, heading off towards the bathroom. "I'm so sorry I shut you out."

"Next time just tell me what's going with you . . . we're supposed to be honest with each other after all . . . and I really can't stand it when you don't talk to me, I've been going crazy out of my mind."

"I'm sorry. I will. I promise. I love you. I never stopped."

"I love you too. And I should really apologise to my therapist." I chuckled on our way to the shower. "He was right about everything."


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter Thirty One:**

"You think I can't annoy you?" I asked Nick as he was driving us to our first crime scene together. We have been back together just over a week now and everything seems to be going perfectly again.

"No Greg, because I don't find you annoyin'." He smiled round at me. "I was just sayin' how annoyin' Ecklie is."

"I know, but he did finally let me back in the field . . . what if I lit up a cigarette, right now? Would that annoy you?"

Nick laughed, rolling his eyes at me. "You don't have a cigarette to light up G."

"If I did?"

"You don't smoke."

"I have smoked though." I reminded him.

"Then I'll refuse to kiss you again. I don't like kissin' smokers."

"What if I started smoking? Would you still love and kiss me?" Nick looked at me a moment then nodded. "You just said you don't like kissing smokers." I laughed.

"No, but you are irresistibly adorable Greg, I'm sure I'd find a way to make you stop. And why would you wonna start smokin' anyway?"

"I wouldn't, just if I did would you still love me?"

"I love everythin' about you Greg . . . and I mean everythin'." He assured me.

"But I can annoy anyone." I smiled at him cheekily.

"Not me." He insisted.

"What if I got a tattoo?"

"Depends." He shrugged. "What kind of tattoo would you get?"

"Any? Like a mass of body art all over my skin or even a spider web on my neck."

"You're afraid of spiders." He reminded me.

"Exactly, whenever I look in the mirror I'll scream in fright as I think there's a spider on my neck." I chuckled making him laugh too. "What if I got a piercing?"

"Where?"

"I don't know. How about a nipple piercing?"

"You, you that's afraid to get your flu shots every year is goin' to get a nipple ring?" He laughed.

"I could get one!" I pouted.

"As long as you don't pierce your," He pointed to my lower half. "I'll go with anythin'."

"What if I got a sex change?" He looked at me shocked. "Would you still love me then?"

"I don't know . . . do you want to get a sex change?" He asked a little bit shocked.

"No, hypothetically speaking here. Would you still love me if I had breasts and an inny instead of an outty?"

Nick bit his lower lip as he continued to drive. "I guess." He shrugged. "I love everythin' about you Greg and if you wanted to get a sex change operation... than yeah, definitely." He smiled round at me. "You don't though do you?"

"I love my penis Nick." I laughed. "I love being a guy too."

"Good, because I love you bein' a guy too, but if you were to ever change your mind . . . I'd still love you." He reassured me.

"Good to know. Not that I ever would. I don't think I've got the legs for a mini skirt." I teased him.

"Okay, can we talk about somethin' else please? We're almost there and I don't wonna be thinkin' about this while I'm tryin' to work."

"Am I annoying you yet?" I asked with a cheeky grin.

"Nope. You could never annoy me." He smiled round at me again.

"Then... would you come out with me?"

"Come out with you where?"

"To a gay bar?" I suggested, immediately seeing the blood draining from his face. "They're not so scary Nick. It's just like a normal bar, except gay guys and occasionally lesbians are around. It's just like a normal bar except everyone's after the same sex instead of opposites." I explained to him. "We can be ourselves there and kiss in public. How often can we do that?"

"I don't know Greg." He pulled up at the flashing lights and yellow tape, turning to face me. "I'm not real comfortable with other guys. I'm just gettin' used to us, I don't know if I can handle the drag queens and all the..." He paused trying to think of the right word.

"Queers." I suggested with a wide smile. "They're not so scary Nicky. They're just normal people, like us they fell for the same sex. We'll just go in for one drink."

"Greg." He moaned as he watched me climbing out of the car. He met me round the back of the car to grab our kits. "I don't know if I can."

"One drink Nick. They're not sex crazed monsters. They're just normal guys." I assured him, heading under the crime tape with my kit in hand. Forgetting to tell him some guys were sex crazed monsters, _just like straight guys actually._

I stepped onto the crime scene looking around at all the debris everywhere. The case was a mysterious building explosion. Three people died a further six were rushed off to hospital and there's two people missing. _This is going to take forever. _There's no telling where the fire or explosion started from. No telling if it's accidental or on purpose either. The whole buildings trashed and the fire crew have completely destroyed all the evidence with their hoses. _Stupid evidence eradication crew! _I'm going to be here forever.

"Greg, you take the east side." Nick instructed.

I nodded heading over to the other side of the crime scene. As I set down my kit I watched a white van with two guys sat inside speeding past. They both looked directly at me as they drove by, disappearing off down the road.

Nick and I section out the whole crime scene so we could take our evidence back to the lab to determine how it happened. Three hours in we found a badly charred body under the rubble. David came back to get her out. As the fire crew helped him get her out we found the other missing person beneath more rubble.

We found the device used to explode the building. A simple trigger bomb set to one of the deceased tenant's doors. Nick and I took all our evidence back to the lab, slowly going through it all.

"Found anythin'?" Nick asked me. I looked round at him then shook my head. "Same here." He sat down beside me at the layout table, looking at all the photos on the table. "This guy has no reason for anyone to kill him."

"He was a lawyer Nick. That's gives him one reason." I smirked.

"None of his clients would do this; he doesn't have any open cases or enemies."

"Maybe he wasn't the target." I suggested, reaching for one of the photos.

"The blast came from his apartment and the bomb was on his door Greg."

"On the inside. Maybe he set the bomb himself."

"He's dead Greg. Why would he kill himself?" I shrugged. "You want us to check out all the other tenants too?"

"Just to be thorough." I smiled widely at him.

Nick looked out the windows of the layout room then pressed a kiss to my cheek once the coast was clear. "See yah later then Bubba." I was almost starting to miss that nickname. He hadn't called me it since we broke up, but I was so glad to hear it again now we were back together.

We never did find out who set the bomb or why the lawyer's apartment was the target, but Grissom sent us home to get some sleep. Nick had to go to the doctors with Starla again while I crawled into bed with a book. They seem to go to the gynaecologist every other week to watch the baby growing. _What's that old saying? _A watched pot never cooks. _Don't you think the same might apply with babies too?_

"Greg." Nick snapped me out of my thoughts dropping to the bed beside me. He pressed a kiss to my cheek then pulled the book from my hands. "I didn't mean to sound like a homophobe earlier."

"When?"

"When I said I didn't wonna go to a gay bar with you and with all the other gay guys there. I just meant, I've never seen guys kissin' and you're the first guy I've kissed..."

"I never thought you were a homophobe Nick."

"Okay, but I did kinda sound like one. I didn't mean to. I don't think gay men are sex crazed monsters."

"Well, some of them are actually. Not all." I told him truthfully. "Some of them go out every night to look for a new partner every night, while there's others who just want to dance and have a drink . . . then there's the very few of us who actually have boyfriends."

"So the same as straight people then." He smirked.

I nodded in agreement, leaning up on my elbows. "We don't have to go, I just wanted us to be able to go on a date and be with each other instead of staying ten feet apart all the time when we go out together. You never know, a gay bar might help you relax a little more because there's other guys kissing and no one cares or looks at you differently. It's completely natural in gay bars."

"Okay... I'll go if you want to." Nick pressed a kiss to my forehead, handing me back my book.

"Have you been worrying about this since you got back?"

"Kinda. Even at the doctors." He admitted.

"You don't have to be worried Nick. We don't have to go. We'll just go wherever you wonna go."

"I don't mind where we go. As long as I'm with you, it'll be okay."

"Just okay?" I huffed.

"Perfect." He quickly corrected, climbing over me to lay on the bed beside me. "Any date with you would be perfect."

"Even at a gay bar?"

"Yeah." He nodded uneasily. "What should I wear though?"

"Ooh Nicky, you don't have to worry about stuff like that. When you see the extreme outfits some of these guys wear, you'll think I'm normal." Nick rested his head on my shoulder, draping one leg across mine and his arm around my chest as he relaxed against me.

"I do think you're normal Greg. Can we go out another time to this... gay bar then?"

"You wonna spend tonight in?" Nick nodded, beginning to fall asleep against me already. "You don't wonna do... anything, anything at all?" I asked curiously.

"Too tired." He sleepily murmured. "Hey Greg . . . I've been thinkin' . . . would you have sex with me?"

"Huh . . . haven't we already?" I asked confused.

"I mean." Nick leant up on his elbow beside my head looking into my eyes. "Would _you _have sex with _me _Greg?"

"Seriously?" I asked surprised.

"I wonna know why it makes you lose control so much. You never thought about tryin' it reverse roles before?"

"No . . . not really. I've never done it before with girls or guys . . . and no one's ever asked me . . . what if I'm really terrible though. The girl I lost my virginity to told me I was terrible in bed right after we broke up, what if you decide to dump me because I'm a lousy lay? If you want to though. Are you sure you're ready though?"

"You're very complex Greg." He smirked. "How can someone as sexy as you be terrible at sex?" He grinned widely as he slid his hand down my chest.

"But are _you_ ready though Nicky?"

"I don't know, I've just been thinkin' about it. I thought I'd ask you first." He softly trailed kisses across my jaw line towards my ear. "If you don't want to though I understand . . . I wouldn't make you do somethin' you didn't wonna do." He slid his palm across the front of my pyjama bottoms as he softly nibbled the skin below my ear.

"I thought you said you were too tired?" I gasped heavenly under his touch.

"But you know you're irresistible Greg." He rasped, softly kissing the sensitive skin below my ear. "And I can't resist you." He slid his tongue across my upper lip as his hand slid south of my pyjama bottoms again. "You look cute as hell in your pyjamas too G." I put my book down as his hand slid beneath my t-shirt to caress my body. "And we haven't had sex in over a week." He added lifting my t-shirt over my head then slid my pyjama bottoms down as he kissed my lips hungrily.

"You know a simple I'm not tired woulda done." I smirked as we broke apart. "I must be a bad influence on you."

"I think you're a good influence on me." He rasped, sucking my tongue into his mouth. "If I had never of kissed you, I'd have never of known what all this is like."

I popped his jeans open, pulling his shirt up over his head as he continued to kiss me hungrily, weaving his fingers through my hair. "You didn't wonna try it right now though did you?" I asked, pulling back from his lips.

"In reverse?" He nervously asked. "No . . . I'm not ready yet, unless you want to."

"No . . . we'll wait until we're both ready." I slid his jeans off his legs then removed both of our boxers, pulling his naked body against mine.

"God I miss this." He rasped, grinding his hips against mine.

We kissed and caressed one another's bodies with wandering hands and deep passionate kisses just like old times as if we had never broken up. I reached for the night stand draw, handing Nick the supplies. He sat between my thighs as he slicked up his fingers, slowly thrusting them inside of me.

"You really like it when I do this to you?" He asked as I began to moan softly.

"I love it when you do this to me. You'll probably like it too." I assured him. Nick pressed a hungry kiss to my lips before he prepared himself for entry, slowly slipping his hard shaft inside of me. I gave out a grateful moan as he did, wrapping my legs around his back to give him more control. "So how's it feel from your position cowboy?" I curiously asked as I had never topped anyone before and I wanted to know what it was like.

"Heaven . . . like nothin' I've ever experienced before." He gasped, joining our lips for hot lusty kisses between our moans. "I can't believe you're comfortable like this."

"I'm very limber." I rested my legs on top of his splayed thighs, sitting on his lap facing him so our chests were pressed against each other, without losing my seat on him. Nick moaned softly as he started thrusting in and out of me from his new position, kissing me passionately while his fingers weaved through my hair.

Nick gasped again, sliding his hands down my sweat soaked back as he thrust his hips towards me a few more times before we both reached our highs, feeling the rush of ecstasy surging through our bodies. We both gasped heavily against one another's parted lips, feeling our bodies shuddering against each other.

I rested my head on his shoulder with him still inside of me, feeling his heart pounding against my chest. "This is how I imagined sex was supposed to be." Nick admitted in a low whisper, pressing a kiss to my exposed neck. "Hot, hungry and sexy as hell with _the_ most gorgeous man ever." He rasped, sliding his hands down my back.

"Ever?" I asked surprised, circling my hands around his broad shoulders.

"Definitely." He kissed me passionately, holding onto me tightly. "I love you Greg, you are truly gorgeous."

"I love you too Nicky."

The light in the room made the sweat from our bodies sparkle like glitter. Nick stayed inside of me a few more moments while we kissed passionately, until he complained of a cramp in his thighs. I pulled back from him, tossing the condom in the bin then cleaned us off with a tissue before we crawled under the covers together. Nick lay on his back with me lying on top, resting my head on his shoulder with our legs tangled together.

A perfect end to a perfect day... _well except for the apartment bomb, that wasn't very perfect for it's residents. I just meant... a perfect end to _my _perfect day!_

According to Greg's law that means something bad is on the way!

* * *

**Three Whole Chapters!!!**

**Aren't you lucky. Five hours straight of non stop writing and barely any sleep will give you that along with a 'Sex in the City' DVD marathon. I hope you like them and they keep you busy for the weekend while I try and come up with some more chapters for you. The 'writers block' has definitely past.**

**Thanks so much for all your lovely reviews so far. I'm glad you're enjoying the story :D**

**~ Holly**


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter Thirty Two:**

I walked in through the front door of my apartment after my shift at the crime lab, seeing boxes stacked in the front room with Nick's things in them. _Oh No! What did I do this time? _The last few days have been perfect. _What could I have possibly done wrong this time?_

I dropped my keys on the side, slowly walking down the hall towards the culprit's bedroom. He was obviously surprised to see me.

"Greg wait! I know what this looks like, but I can explain." He rushed to explain.

"Okay." I leant against the doorframe, waiting to hear his explanation of why his things were packed in boxes. It was pretty obvious to me what was going on; like so many of my relationships he suddenly decided I'm too much hard work and he's decided to move on.

Nick slowly climbed off the bed where he was folding clothes, slowly walking over to me. "Greg first of all, I'm not leavin' yah, so don't panic." I nodded slightly, looking up into his eyes to try and determine if he was lying to me or not. "We can still live together, this is just for the baby."

"The baby you didn't want?"

"Whoa, before you go gettin' hostile... I'm sorry, I shoulda told you earlier. Part of the conditions of me bein' a part of this baby's life is that I have to find my own place. I still want to be with you though. Starla just thinks this place is too small if I was to have the baby a few days a week."

"So where are you going?" I asked, feeling my heart aching at the thought of Nick moving out on me. "Not back to her are you?"

"No! Definitely not! I bought an apartment, that one we looked at together when we weren't datin'."

"Which one?"

"The one you tossed the leaflets around with the ceiling fans, the massive windows and the skylight that I wouldn't have noticed unless you pointed it out. I'm just gonna move some of my stuff over there." _Some? Everything's packed! _I looked into the lying bastards eyes, folding my arms across my chest. He was a little more subtle with the breakup then most. "Are you okay Greg?"

"Am I okay?" I repeated back to him. "Sure, my boyfriends moving out on me, I'm fucking perfect." I mumbled walking away.

"W-Wait." Nick shouted running after me. "I'm not movin' out on yah. I just explained that Greg. Starla won't let me have joint custody if I'm still livin' with a roommate in a small apartment. You can sleep over whenever you like, or I'll sleep over here. This place isn't very big for a child G."

"Go then, what do I care." I pushed past him to head towards my room, but he grabbed me as I went through the door so I couldn't close the door.

"Don't you think you're bein' just a little selfish Greg?"

"Me? You're calling me selfish? Nick I have to share you with so many people already. Now I can't even come home to you anymore?"

"Like who?" He shouted.

"Starla, you've been going out to dinner with her."

"How did you know that?" He asked shocked.

"Don't turn it around on me! You're the cheating asshole that's been going out with her behind my back. When you're parents came to visit you ignored me for the whole week, again. Even when Warrick comes round you completely ignore me. You only want me when we're alone."

"That's not true!" He protested, looking hurt.

"Yes it is!" I almost screamed at him. "You don't love me as much as I love you. I can't just turn off my feelings when other people are around us. I love you all the time Nick."

"So do I!" Stuffing his hands on his hips, he took a deep breath before he started to speak to me again in a much calmer tone. "I do love you Greg. This is for my dream of becomin' a father. You said you wanted me to be happy."

"So my happiness doesn't matter?" I completely lost my temper with him, angrily shoving him out of the doorway. The action took Nick completely by surprise, causing him to crash back into the wall behind him with a hard thud. I was almost about to check he was okay when I decided against it, slamming the door in his face then locked it instead.

I threw myself onto my bed, reaching for a pillow to hug close to my chest. "Ouch Greg!" His muffled voice shouted through the door. "That's not what I said. Of course I want you to be happy too. You said you didn't want this baby to come between us."

"A few weeks ago you said you didn't want the baby!" I retorted.

"Well you were right. As soon as I saw the baby on that monitor I fell in love with it. I do really want to become a dad Greg . . . and if I want that to happen, Starla said I have to get my own place, but I'm not movin' out on yah completely Greg. I do love you all the time. When I'm with other people I still love you, I think about you all the time. You knew goin' into this relationship that we couldn't tell anyone about us."

"But you didn't tell me you'd be moving out on me after only three months of dating."

"Greg you're bein' ridiculous!" With a clenched fist he pounded it angrily into the door. "C'mon Greg, open the door. You're actin' completely crazy. I just told you the reason I'm movin' some of my stuff out and you're still actin' crazy!"

I scrambled off the bed, pulling the door open to face him. "I'm not crazy." I spat at him.

"I said you were _actin'_ crazy Greg, there's a difference." He corrected. "I shoulda told you earlier, I know, but it's impossible to talk to you sometimes."

"How? Why?" I asked with confusion.

"I just tried to talk to you just now and you shoved me into a wall." He pointed out to me. "Last week I told you that you didn't load the dish washer properly and you threw a hissy fit!"

"I did not!" I protested, folding my arms across my chest. "What the hell's a hissy fit anyway?"

"What you're havin' right now Greg." Nick took another calming deep breath as this fight was getting a little out of control. "Look Greg . . . I'm not leavin' you or movin' out on you. I _have_ to do this if I want to be a part of my child's life. You can move some of your stuff into my place too. We don't have to be apart just because I have to get my own place for this baby."

I looked at him a moment with my arms still firmly folded across my chest, not letting him off the hook that easily when something in my brain suddenly clicked. "What do you mean I'm impossible to talk to?"

"Would you stop goin' off topic Greg!" He shouted in frustration, slamming his hands down at his sides.

"You haven't answered a single one of my questions! Why are you going to dinner with Starla?"

"I'm not!" Nick objected.

"You are, because I saw you! Just tell me why!"

"I've been havin' dinner with Starla to sort out the divorce and preparations for the baby's arrival, I'm movin' _some_ of my stuff to a new apartment so I can be a part of my child's life when it arrives. Which part of that makes me the bad boyfriend that you're makin' me out to be?" He asked making me feel bad even though he's the one moving out on me while I was out at work. "See this is why you're impossible to talk to Greg. You freak out over the slightest of things Greg!"

"Me? You won't talk to me for days after you've talked to anyone from your family on the phone, God forbid they ever visit then you'll ignore me for a week, maybe more!" I shouted angrily, _I'm not impossible to talk to! _How dare he say that!

"Greg, you're goin' off point again."

"Because you called me crazy and you're moving out on me."

Nick groaned angrily, rolling his eyes in aggravation. "Okay . . . I'm gonna take some of my stuff over to my new apartment that you're welcome over to anytime, while you cool down Greg. This fight is gettin' completely ridiculous and out of control." Nick grabbed one of his packed boxes from the floor, walking off towards the front door. He stopped mid-step to look round at me again. "I love you Greg, but you drive me crazy." He calmly spoke as he disappeared out the door.

I leant against the doorframe watching as he made a few return trips to take the rest of the boxes out to his truck with his things in them. The thought of living alone again scared me to death. Maybe I was acting a _little_ crazy, but I'm crazy about Nick and I'm crazy about losing him.

I crawled into bed again closing my eyes. _Was anything really going to change now Nick was moving out _or was I going to be alone in my apartment just like tonight, night after night. More than anything I just wanted Nick to stay permanently in my life, but it dawned on me that he was going to become a father soon . . . _would I be cut from his life completely by then?_

* * *

I woke up alone in my bed a few hours later with dried tear streaks down my face. I sat up in bed a moment to listen to the quiet of the apartment before I climbed off the bed and went to look for Nick. The boxes in the front room were gone and most of Nick's stuff was gone too. His room across the hall was completely empty. _It really felt like he had left me._

I climbed onto his bare mattress, grabbing one of the pillows that still smelt like him to clutch it closely to my chest as if it was him. I closed my eyes hugging it tightly as I breathed in his soft strong scents. I felt as though my heart had been torn out of my chest. _Of course things were going to change. _We'd no longer be living together, eating together, maybe not even showering or sleeping together.

About an hour later I heard the front door open and close. I kept my eyes clamped shut, hugging the pillow in front of me tightly. I listened to the footsteps coming down the hall, gradually approaching me in Nick's room. A few seconds later the weight changed on the mattress. I felt warm arms wrapping around my waist from behind me. He pressed his lips to my cheek as he spooned me tightly.

"I do love you Greg." Nick whispered softly in my ear as he spooned me tightly. "Have you calmed down yet?"

I opened my eyes, rolling over onto my back to face him. "I'm sorry . . . maybe I was . . . a little . . . I was a little crazy."

"A little crazy?" He chuckled, smoothing his palm down my chest. "Greg you were yellin' at me when I was tryin' to explain to you what was goin' on then you shoved me."

"I'm crazy about you though Nick. I can't help it. I don't wonna lose you."

"You're not." Nick kissed my eyelids softly then my lips. His tongue tenderly caressed mine before he pulled back to caress the side of my face with his thumb. "I love you too much Greg, you're not gonna lose me. I'm crazy about you too."

"Am I really impossible to talk to?" I asked the question still pressing against my mind. I had to know for sure, I had to know how I could change to be a better boyfriend and easier to talk to. I didn't want him to leave me.

"A little." Nick sheepishly admitted. "I never know how you're gonna react. Like with the apartment thing, you completely freaked out."

"I didn't mean to, but Nicky I walked in through the front door finding all your stuff packed, what am I supposed to think? I want you to be able to tell me anything Nick. I'm a spoiled brat; you have to tell me when I'm being unreasonable or selfish, otherwise I don't know because I was raised that way. I grew up getting my own way; I'm used to getting my own way..."

Nick put his finger to my lips to silence me. He affectionately kissed me, softly sucking on my lower lip before he pulled back, looking passionately into my eyes. "I love it when you get your own way G." He softly kissed my neck as his hand slid down my side. "Oh, before I forget." Nick pulled his keys from his pocket, taking the spare set off and handing it to me. "The keys to my apartment, you can move some of your things over if you want. We can either sleep here or over there, whatever you want."

"How bigs the kitchen?" I curiously asked.

"You don't remember it?"

"It's been almost four months. You think I remember that far back?" I chuckled, licking my lips.

"We'll do breakfast at mine, we'll have to test out the bed too." He rasped, blanketing my body with his as he kissed me. "Oh and... I believe we both have the day off tomorrow."

"So... nothing will change between us then?" I asked, swirling my fingertips across his chest.

"No, nothin' at all. You'll still be my crazy, adorable boyfriend with _the_ softest hair of anyone I've ever dated." He teased me, running his fingers through my hair as he kissed me hungrily then suddenly pulled back. "Your watch is beepin' G."

"Oh . . . it's a reminder for my therapy session. I'm always late."

Nick softly bit my lower lip, seductively pulling me in for a tendere kiss. "How long have you got?"

"Half an hour."

Nick slid his hands down my body to rest at my hips. "I'll drive you if I can have you to myself until then."

_How could I say no with his hands just inches from my crotch? _"Go for it." I gasped as his palm slid down the front of my jeans. We made out like teenagers for fifteen minutes, making passionate love for eight then quickly got dressed, rushing down to his truck where he drove me clear across town to my therapist's office with seconds to spare.

He gave me a passionate kiss goodbye in his truck before I rushed off into Doctor Vincent's office, almost on time. I finally felt like I had a true boyfriend and he was a sex god. I think Doctor Vincent was getting a little annoyed with me talking about Nick constantly and we didn't agree with each other on most points.

_At least I stuck to one topic now though._

* * *

"Here it is." Nick pushed open the door to his apartment, ushering me inside. I stuffed my hands into my pockets as I walked around the large apartment lightly lit by the morning sunshine from the large windows throughout. "Like it?" He asked.

"You need some furniture for starters." I noted as the large living room and dining area were completely empty and the room was very echoy.

Nick stepped up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist, resting his chin on my shoulder. "I'm gonna get a large sofa for in here, possibly a smallish dining table over there..."

"Doncha wonna big TV too?" I smiled round at him.

"Definitely, we'll be spendin' every night at mine when the games are on." He warned me, pressing a kiss to my neck. "So do you like it G?"

"Yeah." I nodded slightly. I still wanted him to live at mine so he was around all the time. I was getting crazy addicted to Nick and I didn't want to be without him.

We spent the whole day in his new bed sleeping together; _only I couldn't sleep, _even with Nick spooning me tightly while he soundly slept.

Meanwhile I was wide awake constantly thinking about how our relationship was going to work once the baby arrived. _Would I still be a part of Nick's life with a small child running around his large apartment? _I never thought about this until now. Nick was going to become a father to a child with Starla and I was going to be the boyfriend on the side; for Christmas's, Thanksgiving's, Fathers days even Birthdays I wasn't going to be a part of Nick's life. I wasn't going to exist as far as he was concerned so he could play happy families with his daughter or son.

"Greg." Nick softly whispered, pressing a moist kiss to my neck. "You still awake?"

"How can you tell?"

"You fidget when you're awake." He said insightfully.

_He really does know me_. I rolled in his arms to face him, met with his gorgeous smile.

"What are you thinkin' about G?" He asked, trailing his fingertips down the side of my face. I looked him right in the eyes, those deep dark chocolaty eyes, thinking how I could possibly tell him that I was scared of him becoming a father and shutting me out.

He had a heart of gold and he was still a people pleaser. I couldn't tell him what was really going on in my mind because maybe I was a people pleaser too, _specifically for Nick._

"Nothing," I finally replied with a heavy sigh. "I can never sleep in new places the first night." I lied to protect his feelings. I didn't want another fight to break out like earlier.

Nick advanced closer towards me, tenderly kissing my lips. "Do you want breakfast?"

"You don't have any food in this place though." I smirked at him.

"There's a diner just round the corner. I'll be back in ten minutes tops." Nick pressed a soft smooch to my lips then climbed out of bed to grab his clothes discarded across the floor. He leant across the bed again to give me a sweet seductive kiss, leaving me wanting more as he head off out the door.

After breakfast; out on the bar stools in the kitchen as we're not allowed to eat in bed here, we returned to the bedroom to lay in one another's arms in the brightly lit bedroom under the white silk sheets once again.

Nick held me so tightly and lovingly in his arms that I never wanted him to let go. Our whole day off we spent it together in bed.

It was all going perfect . . . that is until Nick suggested I went home to freshen up for work the next day. He wasn't very subtle with his request though either, he obviously wanted me out of there.

I decided to ignore it, kissing him goodbye then heading off down the lift to hail a taxi when I saw Mr and Mrs Stokes pulling up in their car, _obviously! _That's when I realised that I'm being shut out already. _Is this how it was always going to be, when someone from Nick's other life came over I'd be shunned away?_

It certainly felt that way.

Over the next few days he invited his other friends Warrick, Catherine and Sara over to his new apartment after texting me a message not to come over. The next day Starla went round to check out the new digs while I stayed at my apartment in front of the TV, feeling as though I wanted to take up smoking because of how depressed I was feeling right now. It barely felt as though we were in a relationship now.

The third day I called first to see if he was busy. He replied with 'I'm too tired, we'll see each other another time.' _Great! _I'm not a boyfriend anymore. I'm the needy ex he slept with before he broke up with me, without me even knowing what was going on. I suddenly knew how these women felt that he slept with. I had my share of the Texan and I was completely addicted, now he wouldn't return my phone calls or let me see him.

The fourth day apart I decided not to call him. Instead I chose a large amount of tequila then the luxury of sleeping alone in a large double bed that still smelt of my boyfriend. _Everything he told me about his new apartment was a complete lie! _He told me it wouldn't change a thing. I haven't kissed him in five whole days let alone said more than ten words to him. _What the hell is wrong with him? Doesn't he love me anymore?_

* * *

The next day Nick stood over me at the break room table. I hadn't seen him in days, now he suddenly wants to talk to me? I looked up at him, starting to feel nervous from his intense staring. "Nick, what is it?"

"I um... I just wanted to talk to you." Nick looked around the break room then sat down across the table from me. "Sorry, I haven't been over in a few days."

"Oh really, I hadn't noticed." I completely lied. I was like a drug addict just gone cold turkey, I couldn't live without him. "Talk to me about what?" I asked, leaning back in my chair.

"I got some bad news."

"About what?"

"Well," Nick started as he looked at me nervously, anxiously chomping on his bottom lip. "Starla wants me to move back in with her."

I looked at Nick wide eyed. "What? Why? Are you back together?" I asked completely shocked.

"No, no... P-lease I'd never get back with her like that, I swear. I meant she wants me to move back with her until the baby's born."

"How longs that?" I asked trying to think how far along Starla was.

"Not yet . . . she's almost five months pregnant at the moment. She wants me to move in a couple of weeks before so I'm there to help her. I thought I'd tell you first."

"A couple of weeks, huh?" I pouted, feeling my heart aching inside of me.

"Greg I know this sucks, but we'll figure somethin' out."

"Do you still want to be with me?"

"Yes." He answered quickly but there was still doubt in my mind.

"Why have you been ignoring me the past few days?"

"I wasn't ignorin' you Greg. I do still want to be with you."

"How are we going to be together if you're back with her though?"

"You think I'm happy about this Greg? This isn't exactly easy for me you know. I've got a baby on the way; I'm experiencin' a new relationship with you. I'm in love with you Greg. I just feel that we're movin' a little too fast."

"Too fast?" I asked shocked. "How do you see our relationship as too fast?" I almost snapped at him.

"Greg you're the first guy I've ever been with . . . and we, you know we had sex and stuff within a few days of gettin' together."

"Like you haven't with these loose women you used to date?" I asked folding my arms across my chest.

"Greg, this argument is completely ridiculous, again! I'm sacrificin' everythin' here for you. What have you sacrificed for me? A few months ago I was married and we coulda been havin' this baby on the way together."

"Are you saying your break up was my fault?" I hissed at him. "As I recall you're the guy who came knocking at my door after Starla kicked you out."

"Well you didn't have to let me!"

"Yeah, I shouldn't have. How about this, I'll go back to being alone and you go back to your normal life of an unhappy marriage, fucking everything that moves, just not me!" I shouted angrily, climbing to my feet then stormed off out the break room.

I was so angry at him for saying that. How am I the reason? I should have reminded him that he's the one that kissed me first. I didn't ask him to come knocking on my door, let alone to come all the way to Los Angeles to be with me.

That night I couldn't sleep again. I tossed and turned all night until I heard a pounding noise in the background. I rolled over on my bed, listening to the pounding on my front door again. I had a splitting headache and the startings of a serious hangover from all the tequila I downed once again. _Kill me now_! I winced holding my head, but the pounding persisted. I rolled towards the clock beside my bed, but all I saw was a blur of green. _Who the hell could that be?_

I threw back the covers, stumbling towards my open bedroom door, giving my legs a moment to wake up before I continued off towards the door. "Ouch! Shit!" I hobbled back realising I had just stubbed my toe on the edge of the kitchen counter. "Oh, ow, ow." I hopped towards the front door, having a painful sense of déjà vu.

I hopped in agony towards the front door, just as whoever it was pounded on the door angrily again. "I'm coming, hang on!" I shouted unhooking the burglar chain, pulling open the door. I looked out into the dimly lit hall and sure enough just like the first time it was Nick Stokes. "This brings back memories." I mumbled, folding my arms across my chest. "Why didn't you use your key?"

Nick held up his keys. "I got em . . . you put the chain on though." He pointed out to me. "Are you drunk?"

"Yes, no... well sort of, I stubbed my toe." I leant back against the wall, staring up at Nick's blurry figure. "Why am I mad at you again?" I drunkenly asked.

"Maybe because I'm movin' in with Starla again in a couple of months and I kinda yelled at you." He reminded me.

"Oh yeah." I nodded, leaning back against the wall to stay stood up straight. "That wasn't the only thing though."

"Greg, I'm sorry for everythin' I said. It wasn't true. I'm the one who kissed you . . . I don't want to be back with Starla, or anyone else . . . I just want to be with you." He explained stood in my doorway.

"I only got half of that." I dizzily mumbled. "Something about sorry, kissed me and Starla."

"You're adorable when you're drunk Greg." Nick reached out for my hands, holding them in his own. "I didn't mean to have a go at you. I was havin' a bad day. I didn't mean anythin' I said." He said softly. "Do you forgive me?"

"I don't know." I shrugged, collapsing back against the wall again.

"You... you don't know?" Nick asked confused.

"Can you run it by me again when I'm sober?" I asked him then collapsed into his arms. Nick caught me before I hit the ground, carrying me off towards my bedroom. He carefully lowered me to my bed, looking at the bottle of tequila on my bed side table. "Nick." I mumbled looking up at him.

"I'm here Greg."

"I stubbed my toe." I sleepily rubbed my eyes, resting back against the pillows under my head. I looked up into Nick's eyes just as my eyelids heavily fell shut. "I love you Nick."

"I love you too Greg." I felt the bed shift as he climbed onto it beside me, feeling his arm wrapping around my waist. "I'm so sorry about what I said Greg. Before you, I didn't know who I was or what I was doin'. When we first kissed I thought I finally found my place in the world then we made love and I knew I wanted to be with you for the rest of my life. I believe I was put on this earth to be with you Greg."

I opened my eyes to look round at him. "Did you just say something?"

"You're adorable Greg." He chuckled softly.

"You're aware I won't remember a thing you said in the morning."

"You barely remember any of it now. I love you Greg." He shifted on the bed to pull our bodies closer together. "I said I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

* * *

**Please Review**

**Thanks so much for all your other reviews. I'm glad you liked the three chapters I posted over the weekend. Almost finished another chapter for this one, just trying to figure out where I want it to go from here. I've thought of so many different paths for this story to take that I can't pick one :D**

**I almost have another chapter done for'Without You' too.**

**~Holly**


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter Thirty Three:**

This morning I woke up to the gorgeous sight of Nick. I rubbed my eyes open in disbelief but he was really there, fast asleep and very angelic looking, right beside me. I tried to piece together what happened last night, but I could barely remember a moment of it as I had drank so much.

I softly poked Nick in the stomach to wake him up, but he remained unresponsive so I poked him again and again until he finally began to stir. "What?" He sleepily mumbled.

"What are you doing here?"

Nick opened his eyes to look up at me, giving me a soft smile. "Want me to repeat what I said to you last night?"

"The part where it's my fault and you'd still be happily married with Starla and a baby on the way if it wasn't for me?"

"No, the part where I'm truly sorry and when we first kissed I thought I finally found my place in the world. That part." Nick advanced closer to me, pressing a moist kiss to my forehead. "And I love you more than anythin' in the world Greg."

"Then . . . why have you been ignoring me the past few days?" I asked, looking up into his eyes as he rested on his elbow beside my head.

"I haven't." He pouted.

"I've slept alone for six whole days Nick . . . without a single kiss."

"I'm sorry Bubba." Nick wrapped his arms around me, pulling me against his body as gave me a sweet tender kiss. "You're really hung up on me, huh baby?"

"Yes . . . yes because I love you."

"I love you too Greg." He softly trailed his fingertips down the side of my face, softly kissing my lips again. "You're the one I want to be with. I've been busy provin' to Starla and my parents that I can look after this baby. I'm all yours now though."

"Do you really have to move in with Starla?"

"Just the last few weeks of her pregnancy . . . in the guestroom." He clarified for me. "Oh." He glanced at his watch then kissed me on the cheek. "I gotta go."

"What happened to your all mine now?"

"I've got furniture bein' delivered." He cupped my face in his hands, kissing me passionately before he climbed off the bed. "You can come over later if you want. Bring some of your stuff." Nick pulled his jeans and a t-shirt on then leant across the bed to kiss me on the forehead. "I love you Greg, you do believe me doncha?"

"Yes, I believe you."

"Good." He snatched another kiss from my lips, affectionately caressing my chin with his thumb. "I really do love you . . . one more then I gotta go." He kissed me again then pulled back to look in my eyes. "You'll come by later?"

"Yep." I nodded, licking my lips. He smiled to me then finished getting dressed.

I watched him walking out once again, hating this new set up more and more. _If I was a woman Nick would have no trouble being intimate or the perfect boyfriend with me._ He still saw our relationship as a sin like he was taught to believe and so long as he saw that, he was going to keep breaking my heart.

"So what do I do?" I asked the only person I knew I could trust with something like this that might know what I was actually talking about.

"Chuck him."

"What?" I looked at Stuart shocked. "Are you serious? After all this time I spent trying to get him?"

"Greg, closeted guys are no good. Me and my closeted boyfriend spent two years playing the cat and mouse game. He broke my heart every time someone from his double life even talked to him. He still dated other women to throw his family off of us and he never let me stay over his place. So, chuck him." Stuart instructed again, blowing his cigarette smoke over me as his boyfriend Spencer returned to the table with some more drinks in hand.

"What are we talking about?" Spencer asked, taking a seat beside Stuart.

"Greg's closeted boyfriend." Lighting another cigarette, I watched as Spencer turned his nose up to the smoke coming from his boyfriends cigarette. _Maybe every relationship has flaws. _Mine and _Nick's biggest flaw was that he can't tell other people about us because he wants to be a good father to his baby with his ex wife. That's not that bigger deal,_ I tried to convince myself.

"Hey, are you two busy tonight?" I asked them curiously. Spencer and Stuart looked at each other then shook their heads simultaneously. "Do you think taking Nick out to a gay bar would be too much of a shock for him?"

"No . . . has he ever been to one before?" Spencer asked.

I shook my head. "Not exactly."

"Ask him... preferably not Flex though." Stuart cautioned me. "Don't you have to go and pick up your car Greg?" Stuart remembered, looking at his watch.

"Oh yeah, I'll see you guys later." I climbed out of the booth, grabbing my jacket off the back.

I finally bought a new car so I could stop taking taxi's everywhere. I was excited about collecting it all day then I suddenly _forget!_ It was nothing special just a brand new Ford Escape Hybrid in silver. _Very special actually!_ I wanted Nick to come with me but he was too busy with furniture deliveries, doctor's appointments, talking to lawyers and going to a straight club with Warrick. _Maybe Stuart was right?_

Once I picked up my new car I took it for a spin then drove back to my apartment, shocked to see Nick stood outside leant against the side of his truck.

As I stepped down from my car I noticed a familiar white van driving past with two guys sat inside. They both stared at me intently as they drove by at a snail's pace sending a cold shiver down my spine. _I had that familiar cold chill of déjà vu again. _It seemed to be happening to me a lot lately.

I watched the van go by then turned back towards Nick as he slowly began to approach me. "Hi, what are you doing here?"

"Came to see the new wheels and I kinda got bored out with Warrick." Nick stuffed his hands deep into his pockets, probably to keep from touching me as he got a little closer to me. "Looks good G."

"Yeah, if someone tries to kill me in this at least I'm higher up." I smirked making him laugh. "You wonna come up?"

"Sure." He nodded, following me into my apartment building with an excited smile on his face.

We both leant against the back wall of the elevator, side by side with our shoulders and elbows just touching as we rode up to my floor. "You smell like cigarette smoke." Nick noticed as he smelt the air.

"Oh, it's Stuart. He smokes like a chimney."

"Who's Stuart?"

"He's just a friend . . . you know you could meet him if you wanted?" I stepped out of the elevator first as the doors opened, slowly walking down the hall, unlocking my apartment door with Nick right behind me. I pushed the door open, feeling Nick's warm hands wrapping around my waist already.

As soon as my apartment door was closed he turned me in his arms to kiss me. I closed my eyes as his heavenly lips tenderly caressed my own, feeling his soft finger tips weaving through my hair at the same time. My knees felt as though they were going to buckle from the sheer pleasure of the single delicious kiss from the Texan God.

"Mmmm," He softly moaned, pulling back from me all too soon.

"Wow . . . did you really miss me that much?" I gasped, looking up into his melted chocolate truffle eyes; _he looked good enough to eat_.

"Yes, I miss you all the time." Nick slid his hands under my t-shirt as he softly kissed a trail from my chin to my neck. "Did you miss me?" He turned our bodies, backing me up towards the sofa in the front room.

"Yes." I gasped as I fell back against the sofa cushions, tugging Nick on top of me by his belt loops. "I miss you all the time too." I closed my eyes as he blanketed my body with his, kissing me hungrily as our equally hardened bodies pressed against each other.

I pulled back from him for a brief moment to ask him the pressing question on my mind. "Are you ashamed... to be with me Nick?" I panted.

"No . . . I love you."

"I know . . . you keep saying that, but are you ashamed that you love a man . . . mainly me?"

"No . . . definitely not. I'll tell people if that's want you want. I was gonna tell Warrick tonight when he tried to set me up with some girl." He softly sucked on the skin below my ear, making me tremble slightly.

"What a nightmare." I joked. "So you came looking for me?" He nodded, sliding his hands beneath my t-shirt again. "Then . . . did you maybe want to go out with me tonight? On a date?"

"Where?" He casually asked.

"To a gay bar?" I suggested, immediately seeing a shocked look on his face. "You don't want to?"

"No, it's not that . . . it's just . . . it's uncharted territory and it's a little scary."

"Says the man with his hands down my pants." I teased him.

"You know what I meant Greg." He kissed me again, looking into my eyes. "I'll go if you want to. I'm sure I can stomach it."

"We'll go in for one drink. You can meet my friend Stuart and his boyfriend Spencer."

"Did you... did you ever date Stuart or Spencer?" He insecurely asked.

"Nope, never . . . they're just friends. They're not even my type."

"Am I your type?" He asked, grinding his hips against mine.

"Yes, you're exactly my type Nicholas Stokes."

"I never did take you out on that date I promised you." Nick remembered. "I'm sorry about everythin' I said to you . . . and I have been kinda ignorin' you lately."

"On purpose?"

Nick rolled onto his side, draping his arm and leg over my body. "Yeah kinda. I'm sorry, it's . . . my nature. I destroy anythin' that's good for me to appease other people. I've always done it."

"What do you mean that you destroy anything that's good for you?" I asked curiously, finding that hard to believe.

"I mean . . . when I was in the little league my dad said I couldn't get a dog because I was always too busy with school and the team, so I pitched a terrible season and got cut from the team then I got my dog." He smiled widely.

I chuckled, rolling my eyes at him. "You're crazy."

"I wanted a dog."

"So why did you try and destroy our relationship?"

He stared into my eyes a moment then rested his head on my shoulder, holding me tightly in his arms. "Because I want my family to love me . . . but I don't want to lose you. Maybe I'm a little selfish too G, I want it all."

"You want the crazy boyfriend, the baby and the loving family?"

"You're a cute, adorable, crazy boyfriend Greg." He corrected nodding to me. "I think I want you that little bit more than the others though." He admitted to me, looking into my eyes. "Maybe a lot more," He smiled wider. "I've been goin' crazy without you. I never knew it was even possible to be this addicted to someone."

"It is . . . and you totally are." I smiled as he kissed me again, sliding his warm hand across my chest to rest at my heart as he deepened his kiss.

"I love it when your heart speeds up when I kiss you." He rasped with a wide smile. "Now you need to grab some overnight things. I've got you a toothbrush and things, you just need clothes."

"You already bought me a toothbrush?" I asked surprised.

"Yep and towels, the non itchy kind that you like. The toothpaste and shower gel you like too." I smiled widely feeling those familiar butterflies in my stomach. "See, I do love yah G. There's even room in the closet for your things and a big kitchen for you to cook for me in."

"That the conditions of me moving my stuff in?" I smirked.

"No, my one and only condition is that I get to hug you while you sleep."

"Deal." I smiled, licking my lips. "Before we go . . . we have an arising problem to sort out." I pointed down to our lower halves.

"Bedroom . . . or shower?"

"If we shower then we can get ready to go out." I suggested, hoping he wasn't backing out yet.

"Done." Nick climbed off me then pulled me to my feet, leading me by the hand off towards the bathroom.

"You're not gonna blow me off again once your parents contact you again are you?" I apprehensively asked as he lifted my t-shirt up over my head.

"No . . . I'll tell them if it helps. I'm miserable without you G." He fiddled with the clasp of my belt, dropping my jeans to my ankles. "You were right . . . you are the one part of my life I want to keep." I tugged his shirt up over his head then removed his jeans, tossing our boxers as we made our way off into the shower. We laced our fingers together, holding hands as we kissed each other ravenously under the warm spray of the shower, for what seemed like an eternity before we finally crashed on my bed, being held tightly in one another's arms.

We lay in silence, swirling our fingertips across one another's arms for a few more minutes until Nick broke the silence. "Do you think I should tell my parents in a letter, phone call or face to face?" He asked my opinion, gently smoothing his fingertips across my arm on his chest.

"I told my mom on the phone," I admitted to him. "But I think your parents would do better with a face to face approach. Do you want me to come with you?"

"No, that's okay. I think I should probably tell them I'm gay, before they meet the boyfriend. I'm not ashamed of you though."

"I get it." I smiled looking up into his eyes. "Don't worry about it Nicky, I'm sure they wouldn't be too disappointed in you. Any parent would be proud to call you their son."

"You're very sweet Greg, but you don't know my parents." He softly trailed his fingertips down my bare chest, circling my navel. "They used to get disappointed over an A-."

"I remember the first time I got an A-, my mom said 'better luck next time, you're only human." I smirked; feeling tingles in my body as his soft fingertips gently tickled me.

"You got an A-?" He melodramatically gasped. "Here I thought I was datin' a genius." He joked, chuckling as he watched me pouting.

"It was one time."

"Relax Bubba, I'm kiddin'." He chuckled, kissing me on the forehead. "You _are_ a genius."

"And you really are changing Nicholas Stokes. You passed up a night with Warrick to have unprotected sex with all the women you could..."

"Whoa, I never had unprotected sex."

"Really?" I rolled on my side to face him. "I do believe Starla is pregnant and how does one get pregnant Mr Stokes? Certainly not through _protected_ sex." I mocked him.

"Shut up smart arse." He laughed, poking me in the stomach. "I know full well how one gets pregnant, but you do realise they're not one hundred percent effective."

"More than enough," I chuckled. "Maybe Starla tampered with the condom or..."

"It's not mine?" Nick queried, looking down at our hands laced together. "Yeah I have thought about that Greg."

"What are you gonna do?" Caressing the back of his hand with my thumb, I patiently waited for his answer.

"Do you think I'd abandon this unborn child just because it doesn't share my blood?"

"No . . . just some guys can't handle raising another man's child."

"Kids can't help who their parents are and I've always wanted to be a father."

"You'd make a great father." I smiled, looking up at him.

"And we... have a date to get to." He noticed the time on the clock. "Get some overnight things so you can stay at mine tonight."

"Is that an order?" I asked, licking my lips up at him.

"Yep, if you don't I'll be forced to follow you back here and snuggle you tightly in bed." He smiled, smoothing his hands around my body to hold me closer.

"I'm liking that plan." I cheekily smiled.

"Ah, but the prize for stayin' in my bed will be much grander." He rasped, softly pressing his lips against mine. "Wouldn't you like that more?"

"How grand we talking?"

Lightly kissing my jaw line he seductively looked into my eyes. "You'll have to come over to find out. Now c'mon, getcha stuff. We don't wonna be late for Spencer and... and..." He stammered, trying to think of his name.

"Stuart. Spencer and Stuart." I corrected for him.

"Right." He nodded then snatched one more kiss as he climbed off me. "We'll take your car." He suggested, grabbing some of his clothes.

"You actually wonna go to this gay bar with me?" I asked surprised that he hadn't tried to back out yet.

"Yeah, I'm not backin' out." He tightened his belt around his waist then crawled back onto the bed towards me. "We can go on that movie and dinner date at the end of the week . . . if you still wanted to?"

"Yep, definitely wanting." I smiled widely.

"Good. C'mon then," He swept the covers off me, pulling me to my feet. "You're a guy; you can't be fashionably late to a date." He chuckled, snatching a kiss from my lips then shunning me off to the closet to get dressed, while he grabbed a bag to stuff some of my things into.

I pulled some jeans and a t-shirt on, rushing off to the bathroom to fix my hair.

"Greg... C'mon!" Nick shouted down the hall a few minutes later.

"One second . . . I'm doing my hair!"

Nick appeared in the doorway, watching me fixing my hair. "You take as long as a girl to do your hair G."

"I do not." I protested, continuing to spike up my hair.

"Are you done then?" He asked, teasing me by raising his wrist to look at his watch.

"You can't rush perfection."

"I think you already look perfect. C'mon, we're gonna be late."

"You're just saying that to make me go quicker." I slicked up the last spike then turned round to face him. "You've been dating women too long Nicky. You don't have to pay me compliments about my hair . . . or my ass." I teased him, stepping past him to grab my sneakers from my room.

I quickly pulled my sneakers on, meeting Nick by the door with my bag of overnight things. "Personally I think your hair looks fine no matter what colour or style and... and..." He sweetly stammered.

"And?" I queried, watching his cheeks blushing a brighter shade of red.

"And . . . that's all I'm gonna say." He pulled the door open, avoiding eye contact as we made our way over to the elevator.

I slyly smiled as we both leant against the back wall of the elevator. "You think my ass looks good, huh?"

"I didn't say that."

"But you were thinking it." I cheekily bit my tongue as I looked round at him. "Go on, say it."

"I'm not gonna say it."

"Say it." I egged him on.

"I don't want to."

"Why not? You think my ass doesn't look good in these jeans or are you just too embar..."

"Stop sayin' that and stop talkin'!" He interrupted me, blushing brighter red by the second. I smiled widely, waiting for the elevator doors to open at the bottom floor.

"You don't think my jeans are too tight do you?"

"Greg." He pouted, quickly exiting the elevator as the doors opened into the lobby. I followed after him, unlocking my brand new car so we could climb in, driving off to our real first date outside of the apartment.

* * *

"Here we are." I pulled up in the parking lot, turning to face Nick. He looked a little pale and a little more nervous than he was when we got in the car. "You okay?"

"Yeah," He nodded uneasily. "C'mon, I can do this . . . and yes, those jeans are tight but they look really good." He quickly rambled climbing out of the car as he blushed bright red. I laughed to myself as he closed the door in the hurry. I jumped out the car, leading him off towards the front door of the bar. "Wa-wait," Nick grabbed my hand, pulling me away from the door before we made it inside.

"What? What's wrong? Gay men don't bite . . . unless you ask them to."

"No, it's not that. This is the first gay bar I've been too. First real date with you . . . and first double date where I actually have a boyfriend."

"So . . . what's the problem?" I asked confused.

"Nothin' . . . I just," Stuffing his hands on his hips, Nick nervously looked up at me. "I feel ridiculous for sayin' this out loud . . . but I feel really nervous and awkward . . . but I never feel nervous on dates, my throats really dry and my palms are sweatin'."

"You are truly adorable." I smiled up at him. "Don't be nervous Nicky . . . we'll go in for one drink then we'll go."

"Okay." Nick held my hand again, taking a deep breath before we walked into the bar. I watched his expression as he looked around the room then led him off towards the bar to order us some drinks.

"Two bottles of Budweiser please." I asked the bar tender. He nodded cracking two bottles open for us.

"They all look so normal." Nick whispered to me as he looked around the bar.

"First time?" The bar tender asked us.

"Yep, he's my recently closeted boyfriend." I informed him. Nick looked at me shocked. "What? You can be honest here."

"Don't worry buddy." The bar tender slid the beer across the bar towards him. "No one's gonna outcha here, half these men are closeted." He assured him. "Enjoy yourself, first timers drinks are on me."

"Cool, thanks." Nick smiled, leaning against the bar beside me.

"Place ain't so bad, huh?" I smirked, gently nudging him with my elbow.

"Nah, not so bad."

"There's Stuart and Spencer, you ready?" I asked, grabbing my beer off the bar. Nick gulped hard then nodded. I laced our hands together so people knew we were together as I pulled him off through the crowd towards Stuart and Spencer. "Hey guys, this is my boyfriend Nick. Nicky this is Stuart and his boyfriend Spencer." I introduced them.

"Hi." Stuart smiled, shaking Nick's hand.

"Nice to meet you," Shaking both of their hands Nick's nerves began to subside as he saw they were normal people just like I told him. We sat down with Stuart and Spencer having a casual drink and talk. Nick got more and more comfortable with them and me as the drinks continued to flow, sitting right next to me with his arm around my shoulder.

As Nick watched Stuart kiss Spencer, I could tell he was getting a little jealous from the green eyed envious stare he was giving them.

Stuart and Spencer got up to get some more drinks, leaving Nick and me alone in the booth for a few minutes. "So . . . do you like em?" I asked him.

"They're okay." Nick nodded slightly, taking another swig of his beer. "I'd rather have you to myself though." He tightened his arm around my shoulder, pulling me closer towards him. "I love yah G." He trailed his other hand beneath my chin, gently raising my chin to meet his lips as he kissed me in public for the first time. _Granted it was a gay bar, but it's a start!_

We stayed for another two hours until Nick really couldn't keep his hands to himself. "C'mon, let's go." Nick excitedly dragged me off towards the door, heading for the parking lot. Nick pushed me up against the side of my car, kissing me hungrily as his hands rested at my hips.

"Nicky . . . we're out in public." I smiled pulling back from him.

"So? I can't kiss my boyfriend," with the alcohol hot in his veins he cupped my face in his hands gently sucking my tongue into his mouth for a sweet seductive kiss. "I love you Greg and I want to kiss you as much as possible . . . I don't care if we're in public or not."

"You might when you're not drunk." I stopped his hands before they slid down my jeans waistband. "I still have to drive us home Nicky, you can hold on for ten to fifteen minutes, right?" I chuckled as he softly sucked on my neck.

"I can." He nodded, pulling open the driver's side door kissing me again.

We both heard a loud tick from inside the car. We looked down at the small device fixed to the bottom of the driver's door in shock. Being CSI's we immediately knew what it was.

Nick grabbed me in his arms, pulling us away from the car. He crashed our bodies down to the ground, covering my body with his as the car exploded behind us. _It was just like in the movies, only this wasn't in any way cool or exciting._

I closed my eyes as the bright flames blinded me, feeling the heat on the backs of my arms and legs. Nick completely covered my body with his as the flames exploded outwards, bursting our eardrums from the loud explosion of the engine parts.

I could taste blood in my throat, feel the hot flames on my back . . . but I couldn't see or hear anything.

All was quiet...

* * *

**Please Review. I hope you enjoyed it.**

**I know another horrible cliff hanger :D I'll try and get the next chapter up over the weekend, but I'm pretty busy. Another long working weekend and I'm adopting a new kitten and I have to get him settled with my other 2 cats so I'll try and write when I can.**

**Thanks so much for all your reviews so far.**

**~ Holly**


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter Thirty Four:**

The fire crews, police crews, ambulances and CSI's all arrived to clear up the scene for their usual routine within a few minutes. Nick sat with me between his legs on the edge of the pavement with my back against his chest. I had my eyes closed resting my head on his knee as I shook in terror from the explosion. His arms were tightly wrapped around me, making me feel slightly safer.

Sara and Warrick were first on scene. They had to stand back while the fire crew put out the fire, destroying any evidence of the bomb device that was used. _Just like they always do._

My limbs started to ache the more I shivered. Nick still held me tightly despite the burns on his own body. The paramedics tried to treat him but he refused to let me go while I was still catatonic. My vision was blurred, my head felt light and dizzy and I could barely hear anything for a long while until it became slightly more muffled and headachy.

"Mr Stokes, we really need to see to your injuries." One of the paramedics insisted.

"Nicky, I'm okay." I just about managed to choke out as I had finally stopped shaking.

"We should get you checked out too Mr Sanders." The paramedic suggested. Nick loosened his grip around me as the paramedic helped me to my feet.

I sat on the back of the ambulance watching the other paramedic checking over Nick as he had taken most of the blast as he lay right on top of me to protect me from the flames. He was lucky to only get minor burns on his arms and back, while his jacket and jeans took the rest of it.

I kept thinking, _who would want to kill me and who would have the nerve to blow up my brand new car? _It was really bad news for Nick since we were right outside of a known gay bar and when everyone showed up he was affectionately holding me in his arms, but he didn't care, he only cared about me.

Sara finished photographing the scene then slowly walked over towards me. "Hey Greg."

"Don't shout Sara." I winced, holding my head.

"Sorry." She said quieter. "Are you okay?"

"There's blood coming from my ears." I pointed out to her.

"Right." She nodded, sitting on the ambulance beside me. "We know it wasn't Dean Clark, he's still in jail. Police have picked up his brother and his mom..."

"Sara I don't think they can construct a bomb and fix it to my car even if my car wasn't locked. They're not bombers, they're not even that bright."

"Are you sure your car was locked?" She asked which really made me think. I couldn't remember locking it, but that still didn't mean that it was any of Ryan's family.

"The white van!" I suddenly blurted.

"What?" Sara asked confused.

"There was a white van, outside my apartment when I got home then there was one tailing me on the way here."

"Ooooh... really." She looked at me like I was insane.

"Sara I saw the same van at a crime scene a couple of weeks ago with the same two guys inside."

"Greg, this city is full of white vans."

"This wasn't just any crime scene Sara, it was a bomb, in a house, building... no an . . . an . . . apartment complex that was it, definitely an apartment complex, with a dead guy, no a lawyer and a bomb, they bombed the lawyers apartment and dead people. Me and Nick . . . Nick and I, we worked it together . . . it's still an open case." I rambled, watching Sara's eyes widen as I continued to talk.

"Greg, I think you hit your head a little hard there. You're not making a lot of sense."

"Sara! White van bombed the apartment then my car, my brand new car with... shit! My favourite t-shirt in it."

"Okay Greg, just relax." Sara climbed off the ambulance still looking at me as though I was insane. "You should get some sleep Greg."

"Sleep? Someone just tried to kill me... again!" I started to panic breathe, making the paramedics rush back towards me.

"Mr Sanders you need to relax; you're having a panic attack." One of them advised me. _As if I didn't know that!_

While I was on the oxygen I watched Grissom and Sara looking at the bomb device while Warrick and Catherine were searching the scene. The bomb device was the exact same device as the one Nick and I found at the apartment building a few days ago that was blown up.

I knew what I was talking about, _why would they try and kill me next?_

* * *

"Greg." Nick softly spoke. I blinked my eyes a few times looking up at him. The elevator had stopped with the doors wide open and I was still leant against the back wall. Nick reached out for my hands, gently pulling me off towards his apartment door. I felt really spacey and dizzy still. I didn't even remember the drive over here.

Brass drove us to the station to give our statements. We were there a further four hours going over everything until they finally let us go home. We had to take a taxi again as Nick was still a little drunk and my car was completely destroyed... again!

Nick gently tugged me into his apartment, clicking the door shut behind us. He pulled me off towards the kitchen; dropping his keys on the side with a loud clatter making us both wince in pain from the loud noise.

"Sorry." He whispered round at me. I noticed the new furniture in his apartment but my eyes couldn't focus on anything specific. Nick sat me down on one of his bar stools while he grabbed a bottle of water from his fridge. He leant on the bar beside me, handing me the bottle of water. "Greg . . . you in there?" He queried, gently brushing back the hair from my forehead.

"Uh huh." I nodded slightly.

"Greg, talk to me. What's goin' on in that over active brain of yours?"

"Why would someone want to kill me?"

"It's probably that case we worked like you said. It's to keep them out of jail. It's nothin' against you." He pressed a kiss to my forehead, gently brushing his fingers through my tousled hair. "You okay Greg?"

"I wish people would stop asking me that."

"Sorry. Do you want to shower first or go to sleep?"

"The entire minute and a half I had that car I really liked it."

Nick smiled pressing a kiss to my cheek. "C'mon, shower then you need to get some sleep." Gently lifting me off the stool, Nick stared intently into my eyes as I stared into space once again. "Greg..."

"Nicky . . . why did you do that?" I cut him off.

"Do what?"

"Save me Nicky . . . why . . . why did you do it? Why would you risk your life for me? Why would anybody?"

"Why wouldn't I?" He asked, cupping my face in his hands. "I love you Greg."

"But you have more responsibilities in the world. If you died who would look after your baby? You've got a big loving family and..."

Nick put his finger to my lips to silence me. "I'd die for you in a second Greg." He delicately kissed my lips, brushing his thumb down the side of my face. "You're worth more to me than my own life."

"That's stupid."

Nick gently brushed his fingers across my jaw line. "That's how much I love you."

"That's still stupid."

"Maybe," Smiling softly he delicately pressed his lips to mine. "But I still love you."

"No shower though. It will really hurt." I winced from the already burnt skin on my arms beginning to irritate me.

"Bed then . . . you can barely stand . . . and I feel as though I'm gonna bump into you." He chuckled softly.

I held his hand as we walked off through his very posh apartment towards the bedroom. We helped each other with our clothes; wincing in agony, sucking in sharp breaths of pain as the fabric brushed against our burnt skin.

"Ouch." I winced as I fell back against the bed as Nick struggled with his jeans falling down beside me. "If I somehow die in my sleep . . . I love you Nick."

"You're not gonna die in your sleep G." Nick crawled back towards the pillows, gently pulling me up with him. "They're minor burns. Take a couple of weeks to go, that's it."

"I think you're still a little drunk." I lay back in his arms, looking at his gorgeous smile. "Maybe if you were sober you wouldn't have used yourself as a shield to protect me."

"Nope . . . sober I'd have done a better job at protectin' yah." He raised my arms looking at the crusted burns along the top. "You shouldn't have to go through that again."

"I'm fine."

"You're still shakin'." He wrapped his arms around me tightly, pressing a moist kiss to the side of my face. "You've got nothin' to be afraid of Greg. I'm gonna do a better job of protectin' you this time around." He assured me as we got comfortable in each other's arms. "I love you baby."

"I love you too." I watched the sleepy drunk beside me drifting off to sleep, pressing a kiss to his jaw line as I closed my eyes, beginning to drift off to sleep myself.

* * *

I slowly awoke to the smell of delicious coffee. I opened my eyes searching for Nick's warmth but I was alone in his bed. I carefully sat up, looking out the large window at the beautiful sunny sky over the city of Las Vegas. It looked to be about midday or late afternoon meaning I had slept half the day and Nick's side was cold meaning he had been gone a while.

I lay back against the pillows looking at the reddish burns on my hands and forearms. I softly ran my fingers across my forehead feeling the cut across my eyebrow and the small cut on my chin. I climbed off the bed grabbing a pair of Nick's clean boxers to wear then made my way through to the kitchen where Nick was cooking up breakfast and making coffee in a t-shirt and boxers.

"Mornin' sleepy head." He smiled up at me as he whirled around. "I've got eggs over easy, bacon, sausages, toast and orange juice or coffee." He set down a full plate of breakfast for me on the breakfast counter handing me a knife and fork. "What?"

"Who died and made you the iron chef?" I smirked.

"What? I can't make my boyfriend breakfast. Coffee or Orange juice?" He asked holding up the juice and the freshly brewed pot of coffee in his hands.

"Coffee." I sat down on the bar stool, leaning on my elbow. "Nicky . . . I'm okay."

"I didn't say anythin'."

"No, you wouldn't. You just act crazy protective. You _can_ talk to me Nick, you don't always have to make breakfasts and act super nice to me."

"Sorry, it's what we do in my family." Nick sat down opposite me with his own plate of breakfast, leaning on his elbow too.

"You make each other breakfast when you want to talk?"

"No, we act super nice and don't confront the problem, actin' as if it never happened." He explained to me.

"Well in my family we talk about all our problems, from my Papa Olaf's bowel movements to a large reddish spot on my mother's ass." I said making him smile. "Seriously, you can talk to me about anything, nothings too extreme for me anymore. I'm not very easily surprised."

"How'd you sleep?"

"Like a baby . . . but I was in your arms." I smiled up at him. "The good thing is I didn't dream about the... other thing for once."

"The other thing?" Nick asked curiously, stuffing some eggs into his mouth. I remained silent a moment, enjoying the deliciously cooked breakfast.

"Do your burns hurt this morning?" I asked to change the subject. Nick looked at his arms then shook his head slightly. "We're lucky these were only minor burns. There's no way I'm going through the skin grafts process again. Do you have a hangover?" I changed the subject again.

"Surprisingly, no." He smiled slightly. "My ears are still ringin' though. Oh and your mom called this mornin', she was pretty worried."

"Was she mad I didn't call?"

"Nope, mostly just worried. I told her you were perfectly fine though. Greg . . . about what happened yesterday . . . after the explosion, you were shakin', sweatin' and ramblin' about plastic and fire..."

"I don't wonna talk about it." I interrupted, avoiding eye contact with him. He nodded, respecting my wishes not to talk about it so we could enjoy the rest of our breakfast in silence, before Nick gave the proper grand tour of his new apartment and all the new furniture. _Surprisingly, he has really good taste._

We crashed on his sofa after, catching up on some of Nick's favourite programs. I relaxed in his arms with his fingers gently running through my tousled hair. "I still can't believe you risked your life to save me." I blurted, looking up into his eyes.

"You can't? Doncha think you're worth it?" He asked, gazing into my eyes. "You're totally worth it Greg."

I gently ran my fingers over one of the burns on his arms then looked back into his eyes. "But you have so much more to live for."

"Like I told you last night Greg, you're worth so much more to me than my own life . . . I'd die for you in a second." He assured me.

"But what about..."

"Do you see yourself as less important or somethin'?" He interrupted me before I could finish. "Just because I have more family than you and a baby on the way it doesn't make me anymore important than you. Is this about what I said that you haven't sacrificed anythin' for me?"

"Kinda." I sheepishly nodded.

"You don't have to, you already have." Nick held me tighter in his arms, pressing a kiss to my forehead. "I don't know why I said that Greg, you've sacrificed more than me for this relationship to work. I love you and I don't know if you heard me when I said this because you were a little drunk . . . but I said I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

"You do?" I asked surprised.

"Definitely, I love you . . . I'm definitely goin' to tell my parents about us, face to face like you said. Everyone at work probably knows about us now too."

"You don't have to do that to prove how much you wonna be with me."

"I want to, not right away of course I still have the baby issue to sort through first. I'll tell Starla too."

"Whoa, Nicky." I sat up straight to look him right in the eye. "You don't have to do that. You can't tell Starla. She'll never let you see your own child. I don't want to be the cause of that."

"You won't be Greg."

"Just hold off the coming out party for a little while longer." I pleaded him. "You can tell them all, just wait until you've got the rest of your life sorted out first. We'll probably have to deal with a load of shit at work after last night."

"Nobody asked though."

"Doesn't mean they weren't thinking about it. We've only been together three months, you don't have to rush on telling everybody Nick . . . I know you wonna be with me." I smiled widely looking up at him.

"Okay, but you do wonna be with me too doncha?" He insecurely asked.

"Yes of course I do, I love you Nick. I'll stick by you no matter what." Nick pulled me closer to him, pulling my leg over the other side of him so I was straddling his thighs.

"Ditto." He whispered as our lips came together. I closed my eyes as he deepened his kiss. Nick slowly slid his hands down my back. I felt a cold shiver as his fingertips brushed against the scars on my back.

"Ouch, stop." I pulled back from him, pulling his arms off my back.

"What? What's wrong?" He panicked. "Are you okay?"

"No, it's nothi... nothing . . . I just have to... to go," I climbed off him feeling cold chills of pain down my spine as my hands started to shake.

"Whoa Greg, what's goin' on? You're shakin'." Nick climbed off the sofa, wrapping his arms around me. "What's goin' on Greg?" He whispered, holding me snugly against his chest. "Was it me?"

"No . . . the explosion . . . it all just came back to me . . . I could even taste the blood in my throat and smell the plastic."

"Shh, shh . . . it's okay." Nick held me in his arms a moment longer, pressing his lips to my ear as he slowly calmed me down. He clicked the TV off, walking us off towards the bedroom then swept back the covers, carefully laying me down then spooned me tightly. "Shh, it's okay baby." He whispered, holding me securely in his arms. The flashes of the explosion began to waste away in my mind. I could no longer smell the blood or the plastic, just feel Nick's warmth and smell his strong masculine scent.

I closed my eyes as he clutched me tightly, willing my limbs to stop shaking with fear.

"Shh, it's okay." He whispered softly, grounding me to reality. "You don't have to be afraid baby."

* * *

I woke up a few hours later still on Nick's bed with his arms still snugly wrapped around me. I turned slowly in his arms to look round at him. He was wide awake, watching me the whole time.

"Hey," Smiling widely, he gently brushed his fingertips down the side of my face. "You okay Bubba?"

"Uh huh," I nodded. "I'm gonna have to bug my therapist with this though. One more problem for my head and I'm fit for a straight jacket."

"You can bug me with it." Nick swirled his fingertips up and down my arm as his other arm tightened around my chest. "You can tell me anythin' Greg."

"Do you really wonna hear all my problems though?" I asked, pressing my chest right against his so I could feel his heart beat against mine. "There's so much crap in my head, especially now."

"Preachin' to the choir here bud," He softly snickered. "I still wake up in the middle of the night freakin' out that I might be in a coffin."

"That's normal though after what you went through. I sweat and shake like crazy. If there's a loud bang I completely freak out. At this restaurant a few weeks after I got out of the hospital the first time, one of the waitresses dropped a glass on the floor and I was having panic attacks all the way home."

"That's normal too Greg. It's just Post Traumatic Stress. My doctor issued me some zolpidem so I can sleep."

"That's what you take that for. I thought you really did need to be medicated to sleep with me."

"No." Nick smiled, gazing into my eyes. "So can you talk to me about it?"

I rested my head against his chest, listening to the soft beat of his heart. "What do you wonna know?"

"Your dreams for starters." He spoke softly, gently running his fingers through my hair. "You wonna tell me about them?"

I gently smoothed my fingertip across one of the burns on his arms, feeling the cracks in the skin as I smoothed my fingertip towards his wrist. "Do I have to give you all the details?"

"No, not all . . . just little things, I wonna help you Greg." I closed my eyes listening to the calming beat of his heart then started to tell him minor details of my past few dreams about Ryan attacking me again. Nick listened intently, softly stroking his fingers through my hair the whole time.

We lay in silence for a few minutes after I finished speaking. I was wondering what Nick was thinking while he was probably thinking the same about me.

I decided to break the awkward silence, unable to take it anymore. "You don't care that you were just outted to cops, fireman, paramedics and the night shift crew?"

"No . . . why should I, you're safe now, that's all that matters to me."

"What about Warrick?" I asked, leaning up on my elbow. "What will you do about him?"

"If he can't accept us . . . then I guess he's not really my friend." He concluded, pressing a kiss to my forehead. "Stop worryin' . . . I don't care that people know about us. You're my boyfriend Greg Sanders and I'm not ashamed to admit it. Hell if I could I'd call my parents right now to let them know."

"Why can't you?" I asked curiously.

"It's the middle of the night." He pointed out to me. "They won't take too kindly to bein' awoken in the middle of the night to hear their youngest son is gay G." He chuckled softly. "If I want my parents to accept me, I gotta do this the right way."

"I understand. You think I don't, but I do. I've barely spoken to my dad since he found out about me . . . I'm not even sure he wants to."

"Why didn't you tell me this before?" He pouted at me. "I coulda been there for yah G."

"You just risked your life to save me; I think you've been there for me enough Nicky." I smiled sweetly. "You can't save me from everything. You're only human after all."

"Yeah, but you're my boyfriend, I'm supposed to protect you no matter what." He gently tightened his arms around me, pressing a moist kiss to my forehead. "I love you Greg."

"Love you too Nicky."

* * *

**Please Review, next chapter should be up later tonight or tomorrow morning. I'm almost finished with it.**

**Oh and be warned the next few chapters get a little angsty for Greg.**


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter Thirty Five:**

Catherine and Sara still didn't believe my story about the white van. Nick wasn't sure what to believe and Warrick was still in shock from seeing his presumably straight best friend holding me tightly in his arms.

But work was somewhat back to normal.

"Sorry Greg, there's nothing on the security cameras." Archie turned to face me, giving me the same sympathetic look everyone had been giving me all day. Unfortunately the security camera on the outside of the bar was facing away from the parking lot. I didn't have to relive through the explosion though, but there was no way of telling who planted the bomb in my car. The other lucky thing was that no one saw Nick and me together, I'm pretty sure he was kissing me right before the bomb went off.

Out of everything that happened, Nick being outted seemed to be the worst. _Talk about incriminating evidence. _We were right outside of a gay bar, in one another's arms when everyone arrived. _It's gonna be tough to try and explain our way out of that one._

I was so worried how people would react to Nick today, but they all seemed fine. _No reason to worry._ Then I caught sight of Hodges giving me his smug smile from across the hall. _One day I'd love to wipe that smug smile off his face!_

I stopped by the layout room next where Sara was working alone on the little bomb pieces. She smiled up at me as I entered, watching me looking over the photos on the top portion of the table. There were many shots of the awfully disfigured car. It's hard to believe it was even a car. The car parts were scattered all across the parking lot, all that remained in my parking spot was a damaged, very flawed frame, one wheel and the remains of a back seat.

_I dread to think what Nick and I would have looked like if we were inside it when it did that._

"You okay Greg?" Sara asked as I continued to stare at the remains of my car.

"Think I can get a refund? Technically I only owned it for about five hours."

"I don't know, I don't think they can resell it as it is, but a dab of paint and some crazy glue, look good as new." She chuckled softly.

"Think they might notice when it doesn't have that new car smell though." I smirked, happy to finally have a distraction from the explosion, _it's all anybody wanted to talk about today. _"Did you manage to match the bomb to the one Nick and I found at the other crime scene?" I asked her. Sara shook her head. "You still don't believe me do you?"

"No, it's not that. The case files gone. All your evidence, photographs and things . . . there's nothing there. I told Catherine, she thinks we might have had a security breach."

"Why didn't anybody tell me?"

"Ecklie said you're off the case." Checking the hall was empty, Sara took a step closer towards me. "He doesn't want anyone to know that evidence was stolen from us, if this gets out the press would have a field day."

"So everything's gone?" I asked shocked. She nodded, getting back to work as Catherine entered the layout room.

"Greg, I sent you on a B&E forty minutes ago." She moaned, checking her watch. "What the hell are you still doing here?"

"Grissom gave it to Warrick, he told me to stay here."

"Grissom's blind sighting me again?" She huffed, storming back out the layout room to find Grissom.

"Good to have the whole team back together again." Sara laughed in a sarcastic tone.

"Yeah," I agreed, rolling my eyes. "Have you seen Nick today?"

"Yeah, he's working with Grissom on a double homicide or something. So you finally got Nick to go to a gay bar with you, huh?"

"No . . . he was . . . walking by." I lied, even though she already knew about us. "Is everyone else talking about us?"

"Not so much, Warrick made up a story that you called Nick to help you out with your car..."

"Is he freaked by us?"

"I don't know . . . a little shocked perhaps, but not squicky freaked. He hasn't really talked about it to be honest with you." Placing a comforting hand on my shoulder, Sara softly smiled. "Don't worry about it Greg. Warrick's not the kinda guy to hold grudges. I'm sure once the shock phase is over, he'll be back to his normal cheerful self around you guys."

"I hope your right. I'm more worried about Nick. His first gay bar and he's outted to the entire rescue squad and police department."

"Ha, so it was his first gay bar?" She chuckled.

"No." I badly lied again, backing up slowly towards the door. "He was just . . . passing by." I slipped out the door, watching Sara's smile widen as I slowly made my way off down the hall towards the locker room. _Just one more hour then I can go home! _I excitedly declared as I stepped past the clock in the hall.

"Hey Greggo," Warrick smiled up at me. He was sat on the bench in the locker room, tying his laces of his smart shoes, while his muddy work boots sat beside him on the floor.

"How was the B&E?" I awkwardly asked. _Sorry I slept with your best friend, _just doesn't really cover it.

"Suspect decided to stash his goods in the sewer and run. Figured he'd come back for it later, but we found it first."

"Ooh." I nodded; thankful he was still talking to me as I made my way towards my locker.

"So Greg," Warrick pushed the locker room door shut so we were completely alone. I gulped hard as the tall dark man took a few steps closer to me. "You lied to me."

"When?" I trembled at the sound of his hard masculine voice.

"I asked you if you had a thing for Nick and you said no."

"So I did, but I..." Warrick shook his head, immediately silencing me. "Nick said..." I tried to explain again.

"Shh." He insisted. "So . . . how long have you guys been lying to me?"

"We weren't..."

"You were sleeping with my best friend? Were you not?" He began to interrogate me, making me feel weak as he towered over me.

"Yes, but..."

"Shh . . . no excuses Greg," He silenced me with a stern finger shake. "Why did you guys lie to me?"

"We weren't lying to you..."

"Have you been sleeping with him?" He cut me off again. I could only nod as the larger man advanced closer to me, backing me up into the locker room wall behind me. "Then you have been lying to me Greggo. You and Nick both. Why'd you keep this from me? Did you think I wouldn't understand?"

"Actually we've only just got together." _Almost four months now, but that's still only just!_

"So, why didn't you guys tell me?"

"Well Nick's only just starting to get comfortable in his sexuality . . . we haven't told anybody."

"How come Sara knew then?" He asked, focusing his eyes on mine as my forehead started to sweat.

"I...I don't know . . . does Sara know?"

"Everybody knows now Sanders . . . I don't like people talking about my best friend like this."

"Like what?" I asked, stuffing my hands into my pockets to keep them from shaking as the very intimidating man took another step closer to me.

"It doesn't matter what they're saying Greg . . . Nick's my friend." Nervously chomping on his lower lip, he awkwardly looked up at me. "And so are you."

A wide smile spread across my face. "Seriously?"

"Don't get too excited there Sanders." He cautioned me. "I'm still pissed that you guys didn't tell me." Warrick took a step back, slowly turning to stuff his muddy boots into his locker. "But I gotcha backs." He softly smiled round at me then walked out the locker room just as Nick walked in. They exchanged a half smile to each other, barely making eye contact.

Nick looked at me once Warrick was gone, probably wondering why I was still up against the wall. "You okay G?"

"Uh huh." I gulped hard as I nodded, trying not to sound like a frightened little mouse.

"What are you doin'?"

"Leaning," I struggled not to laugh at the ridiculousness of myself. "What are you doing?"

"I finished my case; Grissom said I could go home, catch some more sleep. Yah comin'?" He asked, pulling his jacket from his locker.

"Only if we go to my place, I really need a change of clothes."

"Okay. Meet you by my car in five minutes." I nodded watching him walk away.

I scratched at the flaky skin on my arms as I pulled my coat and bag from my locker. The burns no longer hurt, just itched like crazy. "_Stop scratchin'." _I kept hearing Nick's voice scolding me in my head. I couldn't say he had no idea how much they itched, because his were a lot worse.

"I said five minutes." Nick noted, checking his watch.

"My watch is a minute faster than yours."

"That would have explained it, but you took twelve minutes." He laughed, pulling open the passenger side door.

"Eleven minutes actually . . . I can't be on time for everything." I smirked, climbing into the car. Nick shut the door on me, rolling his eyes with a wide grin on his face as he made his way round to the driver's side door.

He subconsciously checked the door for the same wired bomb device that was on mine before he climbed in, just like he did when he drove us into work last night. He then cautiously started up the car, checking all the dials and things before he drove us off home to my apartment.

Nick bravely held my hand as we walked off through the lobby, getting an odd look from the desk clerk as we passed by towards the elevator. _Nick really was going all out with the new found confidence to express his gayness and love for me to anyone._ Not that I minded of course, I'm just worried that word might get back to his parents or even Starla.

They might be a little less understanding then everyone else.

Once inside my apartment we crashed back on the sofa with a few beers and microwave burritos to relax after the long shift at work. Neither one of us felt like cooking and Nick didn't complain that it wasn't healthy for once, so it was a very enjoyable meal.

"Did you talk to Warrick today?" I asked, relaxing back against Nick's chest as he circled his arms around me.

"Exchanged words . . . I wouldn't exactly call it talkin' though, why did you?"

"Not so much. He was pretty pissed that we didn't tell him about us."

"That what you guys were talkin' about when I came in?"

"Yep," I nodded, taking the last swig of my beer. "He's not freaked out or anything . . . he's just pissed we didn't trust him enough to tell him."

"Maybe I should talk to him?"

"Give him time . . . he'll come around. I have a feeling he'll side with us if push comes to shove with the others."

"You do, do yah?" He smiled, gently running his fingers through my hair. "How'd you figure that one out then genius?"

"It's the best friend's duty to defend his friend's honour." I smiled up at him.

"Okay Einstein. Are you tired?"

"Not so much . . . you?" He answered by sliding his hands across the front of my jeans. "Take that as a no?" I grinned up at him.

"Well I have missed you . . . not to mention the lack of sex we've been havin' lately."

"You're keeping track?"

"No, I'm just cravin' you." He sweetly smiled. "And I was thinkin' . . . you know I suggested we try it reverse roles."

"You still want to?"

He took a moment in deep thought then nodded as a wide grin beamed from his lips. "I definitely still want to."

"You're getting gayer by the minute Nicky." I teased him.

"Hey, you're the one that took me to the secret club," He laughed. "Now I've gotta taste of it, I wonna go all the way."

"First things first," I climbed off the sofa, clicking the TV off as I pulled Nick to his feet, leading him off down the hall to my room. I gently pushed him off in the direction of the bed, to make him sit down. He watched me routing around in the closet, wondering what I was doing.

"There's homework to becomin' gay?"

"Yeah." I retrieved the object I was looking for, stripping it from its packaging.

"You have a vibrator?" He asked slightly shocked as I made my way back towards him.

"They're not just for women Nick," I smiled sweetly at his confused expression. "Men use them too, even straight men."

"You want me to use it?" I watched his eyes slowly widening.

"Relax, I'm not going to force you Nick. You said you'd want to try it with me. Before we do though, you should try a vibrator."

"Add this to the list of conversations I thought I'd never have." He laughed through his awkwardness. "How will this help me?"

"If you don't like a vibrator shoved up your," I patted my bum with my hand. "Then you're certainly not gonna like me in there."

"Okay." Nick laughed again, rolling his eyes at me. "How do you..." He nervously spoke, blushing slightly as he looked over the object in his hands.

"Do you want to watch me use it? Then you can use it by yourself until you get more confident?" I suggested. He looked into my eyes a moment then gave me one slight nod of his head. "You sure?"

"Yeah, if your okay doin' it in front of me."

I smiled thinking it was actually one of my fantasies to have him watch me. I propped the pillows up against the headboard, stripping my jeans and t-shirt off. Nick was already getting nervous, just by watching me stripping down to my boxers. I crawled further onto the bed, shedding my boxers as I sat against the propped up pillows. I motioned for Nick to sit at the foot of the bed so he had the perfect view of me. I felt excited just by getting into position in front of him. I slowly clicked the vibrator on, running it across my chest and stomach first as I watched the lust growing in Nick's eyes, making me even harder.

_Having someone watching me made it so much more pleasurable._

I ran the vibrator across each of my nipples, feeling my breathing beginning to increase as the slight waves of pleasure shock through my body. Nick clenched his teeth into his lower lip as he ran his eyes across my figure. I slowly moved the vibrator down towards my legs, gently massaging the inside of my thigh as I slowly moved it up towards my hard shaft. I didn't stop there though, watching the desperate wanting look in Nick's eyes, I continued to explore my body with it, motivated by Nick's intense staring. I knocked the vibrator up to the next speed setting, sliding it across my inner thigh again as a stuttered moan escaped my lips.

Nick closed his eyes a brief moment as though he was trying to control himself.

I moved the vibrator to my sensitive pelvic bone, running my free hand across my chest to caress myself. I experimented with the different speeds across my body once again, getting Nick even more worked up by the second.

_It was so fun to torture him like this!_

I raised my knees slightly higher, starting to stimulate my prostate in full view of Nick. He closed his eyes again as he tried to stifle a moan from his hungry lips, reopening his eyes again quickly in case he missed anything. I clicked the vibrator off, grabbing for the lubricant off the side. Nick looked slightly disappointed as I had stopped. He bit his lower lip, patiently waiting as I quickly slicked up the vibrator before I attempted to push it inside of me.

I started out slow, slowly starting to stimulate my prostate again, watching Nick's eyes as I gently applied a little more pressure at a time, feeling it slowly slipping inside of me. I arched my chest up, clicking the vibrator back on to a low setting as I gently pushed it deeper inside of me.

One of Nick's hands slid down the front of his own jeans to cup his crotch as he watched me.

I experimented with the speed again while it was inside of me. It didn't feel anywhere near as good as Nick felt inside of me, but having Nick watch me was hot as hell.

I continued to torment him for another few minutes until I couldn't take it anymore. _I wanted Nick._

I slowly pulled the vibrator out of me, looking up at Nick. He looked shocked that I stopped, but I wanted him to finish me off. "What did you stop for?" He asked in disappointment.

"I want you now." I grabbed a condom from the draw, waving it around in front of him. "Do you want to?"

Nick immediately pulled his t-shirt up over his head then removed his jeans and boxers, pulling the condom onto his already hard shaft. I grabbed the lubricant, squeezing some onto my fingers to gently rub across Nick's shaft.

Nick knelt down between my legs, getting into position to enter me. I rested my legs over his splayed thighs, kissing him hungrily as he slid so smoothly inside of me. Nick wrapped his arms around me beginning to thrust into me ever so gently to start, striking my prostate every time.

It wasn't long before we both lost control.

Nick moaned my name against my lips as he came inside of me. I started to shudder against him, releasing my warm seed between us. Nick smiled widely as he looked into my eyes, returning to kiss me softly as he pulled out of me, tossing the condom into the wastebasket. I grabbed for the Kleenex to clean myself and him off, pulling him back into my arms against the pillows.

"Mmmm, that was freakin' hot." He rasped, resting his head on my shoulder as he wrapped his arms around my waist.

"Think you could do it?"

"Not in front of you . . . I'm not that brave." He smiled up at me.

"You can try it by yourself at first."

"Would you really want to have sex with me if I do like it though?"

"Of course." I smiled down at him. "I'd do anything for you Nicky. You know if we did do this you'd be one hundred percent gay."

"True, maybe I should start watchin' gay porn too?" He laughed. "Then I'd get my full membership into the club."

"It's good you can laugh about this now." I smiled, brushing my fingers softly through his hair. "You know what sex position I've always wanted to try?"

"No, what?" He asked curiously, eager to learn more.

"The sleeper." He looked at me a moment trying to think, but from his facial expression he didn't know what it was. "Lay on your back with your knees bent." I instructed him, rolling out from under him.

Nick repositioned the pillows behind him then lay flat on his back, bending his knees slightly as I instructed. I climbed on top of him, laying my back flat against his chest, bending my knees either side of his then lifted his arms to wrap them around my waist. "This is the sleeper?" He asked, tightening his grip to fit snugly around me.

"Yep," I rested my head back against his shoulder, looking up at his beautiful eyes. "It requires minimal movements and it's a very intimate position for lovers," Pressing a delicate kiss to his jaw line, I stared seductively into his eyes. "Like us."

"Maybe we should try it next time." He smiled kissing me back. "I think I could sleep with you like this."

"Hence the name," I smirked. I reached for the covers, pulling them up over our bodies then pressed a kiss to Nick's cheek as we slowly drifted off to sleep together.

* * *

A few hours later I awoke craving coffee. Nick was fast asleep so I quietly got dressed then snuck out of the apartment to buy us some coffee before he woke up. I found a coffee shop just down the road, buying us some pancakes to go with the coffees. As I exited the coffee shop I looked across the street at the white van.

_They are definitely following me!_

I stood perfectly still a moment, staring at the two men inside as they stared right back at me. _What did they want from me? Were they just trying to kill me or did they want something else?_

"Ah!" I jumped as my phone rang, scaring me to death. I pulled it out of my pocket, snapping it open. "Hello?" I shakily answered, looking up to see the white van had gone in the blink of an eye. "I went to get coffee."

* * *

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	36. Chapter 36

**Chapter Thirty Six:**

"No one else saw a white van, there's no evidence of a white van..."

"So you don't believe me?" I huffed at Grissom. I thought of all people, he would be the one to believe me the most. "What about the stolen evidence? Are we forgetting about that? If I was a bomber, the first thing I would do is cover up all the evidence against me."

"Your evidence is circumstantial at best Greg . . . there's nothing to link your case against the bomb case you worked a couple of weeks ago. Bring me some real evidence then maybe I can believe you."

"How? I'm not allowed to work my own case and the other case all the evidence was stolen."

"Didn't you keep any other pictures? I'll allow you to work with Sara on your case, as long as you don't take it too personally." Grissom explained as he sorted through the stacks of paper work on his desk.

"Personally? Of course I'm taking it personally. Someone tried to kill me. Who's to say they won't try again?"

"We're taking every precaution Greg. It's been three weeks. They haven't tried to kill you again, yet..."

"Oh thanks! You just jinxed me now! The white van is following me around everywhere Grissom. It was outside the coffee shop two weeks ago. Outside the Laundromat then this morning it followed me here. "

"Greg, don't be ridiculous. I don't believe in superstitions like that. We will find whoever did this to your car Greg..."

"I'm not worried about the car! I'm worried they're gonna do it again!"

"Greg, relax." Grissom climbed to his feet to face me. "Getting yourself worked up like this isn't going to help out any Greg. If your calm you can work this case with Sara, otherwise I'll have to send you home."

"Grissom!" Sara shouted, running into his office. "We got another bomb!" She motioned for us to follow her towards the TV in the breakroom. I stepped through the crowd in front of the TV to see the screen clearer. The reporter was stood outside a large apartment building that now lay in ruins. In the background was a team of fire fighters, putting out the flames from the explosion while some paramedics lifted badly bleeding victims from the rubble, getting them off to hospital to save their lives.

I walked off as my skin started to tremble, finding a quiet area all to myself.

I stepped out into the stairwell, sitting down against one of the walls, pulling my knees close to my chest as I struggled to calm my breathing down. I looked up as I heard the door open, seeing Nick stood in the gap. "Hey . . . you okay?" He closed the door behind him then knelt down in front of me, placing his hands on my knees. "You okay G?" He softly repeated.

"I'm okay." I nodded, placing my hands on top of his.

"You're shakin'."

"There was another bomb."

"I saw. You don't have to go anywhere near it Greg." He assured me, giving me a soft smile. "C'mon, it's gonna be okay baby. They can't getcha."

"I'll be okay." I nodded to him. "How many people died?"

"They don't know . . . they're still findin' survivors."

"I wonna help . . . I can help." I assured him. Nick leant across me, pressing a kiss to my forehead then climbed to his feet to help me up.

"You really should talk to your doctor about this Greg."

"I'm not helpless."

"I know you're not . . . meds might help you to stay relaxed so you don't keep havin' panic attacks." He reasoned with me, gently caressing my chin with his thumb. "Trust me, it'll help you. Drugs helped me to stay relaxed. Believe me doncha?"

"I believe you."

"Are you with me?" He asked, looking into my eyes.

I nodded taking slow deep breaths. "I'm okay."

"Good." He gave me one soft kiss to the lips then pulled the door open, allowing me to step by him first.

Grissom sent us all off to the crime scene as it was a priority case. I didn't see the men from the white van or their van anywhere this time, but they were bound to show up some time today.

Warrick and Catherine started work on photographing the seven victims that didn't make it out alive. A further eight were in hospital, expecting to make a full recovery while there was one person missing.

Grissom and Sara started to photograph the building, debris, survivors as well as taking their statements while Nick and I had to search each floor for the point of impact. From the looks of it the bomb was in the elevator which was stationary on the top floor. The fire spread outwards, catching each floor until the fire crew was alerted.

Some of the hallways were impossible to get through from the collapsed ceilings and the floors were caving in underneath us as the building was old and the flames had significantly weakened the once sturdy structure.

"Think I got it!" Nick shouted from down the hall. I stayed against the wall where I was, watching him photographing and retrieving a piece of melted plastic that could have possibly housed a bomb. "Same material as the one on your car and the apartment buildin' before that." He announced.

"So, what they just blow crap up for fun? They don't care about the people inside?"

"Well their first target was a lawyer then you. We'll have to sort through the residence of this buildin' . . . find out which one coulda been their target."

"Why me?" I asked.

Nick stepped over a collapsed wall, heading back towards me. "Maybe because you saw them, or they might be goin' after you coz you worked the last bomb case."

"You worked it too."

"Maybe we're both their targets then. C'mon, let's see if we can find anymore pieces of this." I nodded but I still couldn't move. There was a body just down the hall from us. The guy never made it out of his apartment. All his skin was singed off making him look somewhat like a horror movie monster. David hadn't made it to our floor yet, but my guess was he was the missing man off the list.

"Greg C'mon!" Nick shouted from down the hall.

"I'm coming. I'm coming." I sucked in a deep breath, wishing I hadn't as I could taste the smoke on the back of my throat. I climbed over the collapsed wall, following Nick off down the next hall in the direction of the blast. We couldn't search the top floor as it was no longer there though.

We were two floors down from the top, finding out we couldn't go any further because the next floor was completely sealed off with rubble from the destroyed floor above, so Nick had a very unintelligent idea to climb the elevator shaft.

Luckily he volunteered to do it, as I would never, but it's still a stupid idea.

"Nick, you don't have to do this." I tried to persuade him still.

"It's okay, I'll be fine Greg." Nick assured me as the fire crew strapped him to a safety harness so he could repel down the shaft.

"Have you ever done this before?" I asked, looking up the charred shaft that was very badly damaged.

"This . . . in an elevator shaft, no. But I've done it in a cave once." Nick smiled at me like nothing was happening. "I'll be fine Greg."

"Okay Mr Stokes, are you ready?" The larger fireman asked him.

"Why does Nick have to go?" I asked them, trying to stop this stupid plan before it went ahead.

"I know what we're lookin' for." Nick gave me a wink then swung out into the elevator shaft, slowly being hoisted down by the hunky looking fireman to look for any stray bomb parts. _They better be built for power and not comfort! If they drop my boyfriend . . . I'll..._

I'm never good at threats. I'll probably talk their ears off.

"Nick?" I shouted a few seconds later to make sure he was still breathing.

"I'm okay G. Stop a sec!" He shouted up.

"Mr Sanders, don't stand so close." One of the firemen cautioned me. I shot him a glare trying to look over the edge to see if Nick was okay.

"Found some wires G!" Nick shouted up, carefully retrieving them then shoving them into an evidence bag in his pocket. "Okay, keep goin'." The firemen carefully began to lower him again, watching me nervously as if I was going to push them over. _Only if you drop my boyfriend I will._

"Nick! Keep talking!" I desperately shouted as the building was very unstable, it could collapse or cave in at any moment, especially since the elevator was the primary impact point.

"I've found the lift! It's caught between the sixth and seventh floor." He announced.

"Don't go in!" I shouted, hoping he wasn't that stupid.

"I can't anyway!" I looked over the edge down at his flashlight in the dark tunnel. "Hold on, I found somethin'!"

"Nicky, don't go inside. You could be crushed." I started to fret.

"Mr Sanders, could you please step back." The firemen asked again.

"It's _CSI_ Sanders actually." I pointed to my badge. "Is your boyfriend repelling down a very un-sturdy elevator shaft?" I snapped at him. "No, so you shut up mister!"

"Greg, play nice." Nick cautioned me. I glared at the firemen as they looked at me again, desperately waiting for Nick to be returned to me safely.

"What was that?" I asked as a loud screech echoed through the elevator shaft.

Both firemen shrugged looking at each other.

I held the edge of the doors tightly as I looked over the edge. "Nick! What you doing? The elevator can't take your weight, you'll be dropped to the lobby before you even realised what happened."

"Thanks for that Greg!" He shouted up to me sarcastically.

"I'm serious Nick, I'm not gonna process Nick soup tonight before I head home."

"I'm fine Greg. I just need to get this!" I slammed my hands down at my sides angrily, making the firemen jump in fright.

I heard another loud screech echo through the shaft, making me even more angry at Nick. "Nick! What are you doing?" I shouted, but there was no answer. "Nick! Nick! Pull him up, right now pull him up!" I demanded the firemen, but they both just stood there completely clueless. "Nick!" I shouted down the shaft. "Son of a bitch! If he ain't dead, I'm gonna kill him." I muttered to myself as I walked off towards the staircase, taking them down two at a time to reach the seventh floor. I burst out the door heading off towards the elevator doors, looking down at the stuck lift below.

"Nick! What are you doing!" I shouted angrily, following the safety harness cable with my eyes that was hanging into the roof of the lift.

"Hold on!" Nick shouted.

I watched in horror as the lift started to move under his weight. "Nick, you gotta get outta there!" I desperately shouted, knowing the stubborn Texan wouldn't listen to me anyway.

The lift started to slip further making a very loud screech as the metal grinded against the damaged elevator shaft. "Nick! Get Out!" I jumped back as the lift slid down the shaft, hearing the firemen shouting from upstairs.

I ran for the stairs again, taking them down two at a time, checking each floor for the lift.

The lift finally stopped moving at the third floor. I jumped over the large hole in the floor towards the lift, desperately searching for signs of life. "Nick! Nick!" I frantically shouted.

He climbed out the hole of the lift, wiping the blood from his forehead. I reached out for his hands to pull him up, helping him find his footing. I waited for him to catch his breath then slapped him round the face.

"Ouch." He looked at me shocked, holding his cheek. "What was that for?"

"Don't do that to me asshole!" I shouted angrily at him. "Why do you always have to do that? Why do you always have to be the big hero in everything you do?"

"Greg, I'm okay. See, I'm here and okay."

"But why? You should care more about your own life Nick!" I shouted, feeling as though I was going to cry at the thought of losing him.

"I do. Stop shoutin'." He spoke in a much softer tone. "I do care Greg."

"Then why do you keep risking your life for things? Like me. Why would you do that?"

"You're still on that? I explained that Greg..."

"Ahem!" We both looked down the hall at Grissom. "You wonna take this lovers' quarrel someplace else boys?" He suggested, slowly approaching us. "I can't allow my CSI's to engage in a romantic relationship for exactly this reason. You quarrel on the job, you jeopardise the investigation."

"Sorry." We simultaneously apologised.

"Nicky you okay?" Grissom asked him, seeing the blood on his head.

"Yeah, I'm fine." He nodded, wiping the blood away on his sleeve. "It's just a scratch." He looked at me to say the next part. "I'm fine."

"Get it checked out by the EMT's downstairs. Greg I want you with the body on the ninth floor with David." He instructed, heading back off down the hall.

I glanced up at Nick then made my way off up the stairs to meet David by the body. I took some more photographs of the body, collecting anything I thought might come in use around it then resumed searching each floor for any trace or evidence that could help us out in our investigation.

Nick and Warrick found the missing body... or parts should I say at the bottom of the elevator shaft. He appeared to be right next to the explosion when it went off as all his flesh was burnt off and he was in pieces.

We spent a further six hours there until we stopped for breakfast at a local police diner. It had been a while since we all ate together, but it wasn't like the other breakfasts we shared together, this one was deadly silent, _I could seriously hear crickets._

I didn't know if it was because of the case or because of me and Nick being found out, but no one talked to anyone.

"Well, c'mon on then looks like we're pulling a double as it is." Grissom announced, climbing to his feet. We all reluctantly climbed to our feet, getting back to the crime scene to work another shift on collecting evidence that we still had to process.

Six hours later we sleepily made our way back to the lab to go through everything we collected. I isolated myself in an empty layout room to look over the list of tenants from the apartment building to try and find a link between anyone in this building and the lawyer from the last one, but as usual a bit fat pile of nothing.

"Hey Greg," Nick leant on the other side of the table, looking across the evidence at me.

"Here to save me from paper cuts?"

"Very funny," He mumbled sarcastically. "Do you want me to apologise for savin' you?"

"Nope." I shook my head, avoiding eye contact with him as I kept looking over the lists in front of me, trying to find a connection.

"Then what Greg?"

"I didn't say anything." I shook my head then changed the subject. "Hey, I found something. Did you know the lawyer had a client living in this building? The client moved out less than a week ago though. You think the bombers didn't catch the memo?"

"Greg, we need to talk about..."

"He lived right near the elevator on the top floor too. The apartment now lays vacant. If you are right and they're targeting specific people then what do I have in common with a lawyer and this guy who was arrested for... credit card fjord . . . twice."

"Nothin' . . . Greg, we have to talk."

"We really don't, unless you're about to tell me our evidence from the last crime scene showed up or we have more leads." I pulled my I-Pod from my pocket, selecting one of my playlists then stuffed the buds into my ears so I couldn't hear him anymore.

Nick stayed leant against the table a moment longer, staring at me as I tried to get back to work. It proved to be a lot harder with someone staring at me and he refused to go away like I expected him to. Instead he pulled up a chair and sat down, going through the lists with me to determine a better connection then the one I found, even though I thought it was a pretty promising lead.

"I think you might be right about that bein' our only lead." Nick shouted over my music an hour later. "No one else in that building has any connection to the lawyer, unless his apartment was just targeted at random."

"I don't think so."

Nick looked up at me expecting to hear my explanation. "Greg . . . what?"

I pulled the I-Pod buds from my ears. "I said . . . I don't think so. Let's assume the lawyer was their target since it was on his door. This time around the bomb was in the elevator. You know how some apartment buildings still have door and elevator operators?" Nick nodded. "Well this one does. A Michael Whitely."

"Was he one of the deceased?" I nodded. "So, what's the big deal about that?"

"While I was sleeping with Ryan, he was sleeping with a Michael Whitely on the side." Nick looked up at me wide eyed. "And our lawyer . . . he is in fact gay. Still think I wasn't a specific target?"

"They're goin' after gay guys?" Nick asked confused.

"Why not? The lawyer was gay, there was a bomb on his apartment door and he's dead. I'm gay; there was a bomb in my brand new car. Michael Whitely was gay and he's laying in pieces at the bottom of an elevator shaft. I think it's safe to assume they may be targeting gay men, not just any gay men, but ones that have a membership card to Babylon. I checked . . . we all do and it's the only other thing we have in common, besides the gay thing . . . and possibly the sleeping with Ryan thing."

"You have a membership card to Babylon?"

"Yeah, they gave me a good deal." I smiled up at him. "So, you like my theory or not."

"It's a dumb theory. How'd you know this lawyer guy slept with Ryan?"

"Ryan's slept with everyone who ever stepped foot in Babylon, I'd say it's very likely. And I meant my theory about the gay thing." I corrected to him. "You know, I heard that place was hacked a few months ago. Their security system went down and someone got into their system. Maybe these guys did that and are now targeting all the men who have membership cards with them?"

"So this is a hate crime?"

"It's a theory. There's only two dead guys at the moment, it doesn't exactly make a pattern though. Maybe they'll try to kill me again and you'll be scraping up my charred remains off my apartment floor in a few days . . . then that backs up my theory."

"Don't say that G."

"I think I'd of preferred to have died by Ryan's hands, rather than an explosion or fire. Drowning doesn't seem like such a bad way to go though . . . but there is the raped to death thing. That's still better than fire."

"Greg! Shut Up!" He shouted in frustration. "Don't talk like that."

"You two fighting again?" Grissom asked, poking his head round the door.

"Greg has a theory." Nick mumbled, giving me an evil eye. "He thinks our bombers are goin' after gay men and the target of this explosion was the doorman at the bottom of the elevator shaft."

"The guy in bits and pieces?" Grissom asked, looking over the evidence on the table.

"Yes, the doc found shrapnel in the body pieces, similar to the bomb's casing. And he had a membership card to club Babylon, just like the lawyer from our previous case . . . and me." I added.

"You think they're going after homosexual men then?" He asked the two of us. I nodded but Nick still wasn't sure. "Then we're looking for homophobic men, possibly with a record of building bombs or arson . . . nice work Greg." He smiled at me then walked out the layout room, stopping at the door. "You two should head home and catch a couple of hours sleep. Stay by your phones though." He warned us before he head off.

I collected up everything on the table in front of me, stuffing it back into an evidence file then replacing it to the box. Nick stood back watching me, remaining deadly silent the whole time.

I picked up my I-Pod off the table, looking up at Nick. "I'll see you later then."

"Whoa . . . you don't want me to come with you?" He asked surprised.

"No, I'll take a cab." I stuffed my I-Pod back into my pocket, grabbing my jacket off the back of the chair. "See you later."

"Greg, what'd I do wrong this time?"

"Nothing, I'm just tired is all. I wonna go home and get some sleep." I proceeded to walk off down the hall, collecting my bag from my locker.

Nick caught up with me, but he didn't stop me from leaving like I thought. Instead he awkwardly shoved his hands into his pockets, struggling to think of something to say to me. "Greg . . . are you mad at me about somethin'? Coz if you are, can you tell me what I did?" He pleaded with his puppy dog expression.

"No, nothing." I lied. The truth is I was worried sick about him. He has a hero complex in which he thinks everything and everyone is far more important than him. He risked his life to save me then he risked his life to collect evidence. I was scared I was going to lose him, but instead of telling him I shut him out to spare myself of the pain, _just like my father does._

"I'll call you later." I spoke softly, stepping past him.

I hailed a taxi outside, giving him the directions to take me home. As we got further and further away from both the crime lab and Nick I started to feel a little less safe. It didn't take long for the taxi driver to get me home. I tossed him some money then headed straight inside, leaning against the back wall of the elevator as I rode it up.

I sighed heavily as I stepped out of the elevator on my floor, just reading a text from Nick saying how much he loved me and he'd give me some space if I needed it.

I pulled my keys out from my pocket, heading off towards my front door. My face and clothes were still covered in black soot from all the crap I had been digging through all night. The bleached spikes in my hair were actually black now. I desperately needed a shower and a good few hours sleep before Grissom summoned us all back into work.

I slowly turned the key in the lock of my front door, pushing the door open slowly. I heard a strange click; looking through the gap in the door I saw a wire. _Oh Shit! _I dropped my keys and bag, running back from the door, towards the staircase door. As I ran the blast from the bomb caught up with me, sending me flying down the flights stairs as I lost my footing.

I rolled down the next flight of stairs, smacking my head hard against the solid wall.

As I looked up I could see the flames of fire starting to spread. Luckily for me the stairwell wasn't exactly a fire hazard, but I did get swamped with the smoke of the burning furniture, walls and carpets... possibly even bodies.

I suddenly began to feel really dizzy and queasy from my head wound. I struggled to move but everything started to blur. I felt sharp pains in my head and sides then suddenly dropped to the cold stone floor, looking at the bloody red pool of liquid trickling out from beneath me before I passed out.

* * *

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**Will Greg survive? Keep reading to find out...**


	37. Chapter 37

**Chapter Thirty Seven:**

I snapped my eyes open, immediately gasping for air.

I struggled to sit up in bed, being pulled back by tight restraints around my body as I heavily panted, struggling to breath. My eyes slowly readjusted to the light of the room, but it was still blurry making me feel dizzy. I felt pain shooting up my arms and legs and a tight suffocating feeling in my chest, not to mention the blinding pain in my head. It felt as though I had been repeatedly smacked in the head with a ton of bricks.

"Shh, shh, just relax G." Nick rushed into the room trying to calm me down. I continued gasping for breath and panting heavily, feeling as though there was a large weight on my chest or something. I looked around the room I was in, feeling completely disorientated. "Doctor, Doctor!" Nick's muffled voice shouted as he tried to calm me down, but I couldn't stop my body from shaking violently, it felt as though I was being electrocuted or something. "Shh, relax Greg, you're safe. You're safe."

A man appeared beside me in a long white doctor's jacket. I felt a sharp prick in my forearm then I began to feel dizzy and sleepy again. I stopped struggling in Nick's arms and fell back against the pillow behind me. I didn't know where I was or what happened to me, but I felt safer knowing Nick was right beside me.

His figure slowly began to blur as I passed out again.

A few long hours later I gently began to open my eyes, allowing the pale lights of the room to enter. My vision was completely blurred a moment longer before shapes slowly began to form around me. I saw some machinery around me then some chairs in the corner, two of which were occupied.

I blinked my eyes a few more times until the shapes of the people began to clear. "Grissom." I groggily spoke.

"Greg." Grissom climbed to his feet, heading to my bedside. I struggled to raise my arms but they were still securely strapped down, making me even more worried. "How do you feel Greg?" Grissom asked in a concerned voice. He usually tries to hide his emotions, but now I could hear it clearer than ever.

"Okay . . . I guess. What happened?" I choked out, feeling the tightness in my chest again.

I looked up at Grissom seeing the blurred shape of Sara stood beside him.

"You don't remember?" Grissom queried. I shook my head slightly, looking around the hospital room I was in. "There was an explosion at your apartment building Greg."

"There was?" I heard a beeping noise starting to increase. I looked up at the machines beside me realising it was my heart beat that was increasing.

"Greg, we think it's the same guys that tried before. Warrick and Catherine found the same type of bomb too. Whoever our suspect is... just made you and they were trying to kill you." My breathing began to get a little more difficult. My chest ached all over as I gasped for my next breath. "Greg you need to rest, we'll be back to ask you a few questions later." Grissom ushered Sara off out the room as she looked at me with tears in her eyes. I looked at the machine beside me as the beeping only got louder.

I hated hospitals. _If I can get up of my own free will then there's no way I'm staying here._

I struggled to get free, but the restraints were around my wrists, ankles and chest, keeping me securely strapped to the bed. I kept struggling, slowly beginning to loosen the one around my left wrist the more I did. _Luckily they were the Velcro kind and not the belt straps or I'd never get loose. _Once it was loose enough I slipped my wrist out, stripping the one off my chest, along with the rest.

Once free I struggled to get out of bed, feeling aches and pains all across my body, my legs felt weak. They buckled underneath me sending me crashing to the floor. "Greg." Nick's voice shouted from the doorway. "C'mon G, you gotta get back in bed." He rushed to my side to help me, but I pushed him away as I felt sharp pains in my sides. "Greg, you can't move, you're badly wounded."

"I can. Please, let go of me." I pushed him back again just as two men in long white coats entered the room. "No, I can't stay here." I winced as two doctors rushed over to help Nick get me back to my bed.

"Mr Sanders you're going to need to stay in bed. If you move around too much you'll only aggravate your injuries further."

I struggled as the doctors tried to hold me down, trying to force a needle into my arm again. "No please... Let me go!" I almost screamed in terror.

"Greg, just relax, they're tryin' to help you." Nick's voice shouted, sounding panicked.

"I don't want to stay here... please I just want to go... Let me go." I pleaded continuing to struggle with the doctors. My arms and legs started to tremble, my vision became slightly blurred and I could hear the sounds of explosions in my head. "Ow, let me go. Please let me go!"

"Mr Sanders you need to calm down." One of the doctors shouted.

I felt my heart pounding heavily against the surface of my sore chest. My breathing only became worse. I was struggling to reach my next breath as I puffed and wheezed, fighting off the doctors trying to hold me down. I fell to my knees again as I struggled to stand, hearing high pitched shrieks, muffled voices and tasting blood and ash in my mouth.

I winced in agony as the doctors touched me, feeling a white hot pain throughout as the burnt skin on my body began to seep blood. A third doctor ran in helping the other doctors to lift me back onto the bed and strap me down.

They strapped my chest down first then struggled with the wrist and ankle restraints as I continued to struggle to get free before they finally got the needle in my arm. I started to feel dizzy again. My eyelids started to feel really heavy as the doctors made their way out of my room. Nick's figure started to blur beside me as I fell asleep once again. The sounds around me quietened. I could no longer feel the pain or taste the blood.

It was all gone, just like a bad dream.

* * *

"Hey, you wakin' up G?" Nick's voice softly whispered. I opened my eyes slightly wider to look up at Nick. I struggled to move but I was still securely strapped down to the bed. Nick pulled his chair slightly closer towards me, lacing his fingers with mine. "It's okay Greg, you're okay. You're safe."

I looked around the room, still feeling sleepy and groggy. "Why won't they let me go?"

"You're hurt Greg."

"I wonna go home."

"Greg sweetie . . . you can't." Nick whispered softly. "Can you breathe okay now?" I took a deep breath feeling my breathing was a little better than before. "They gave you a thoracostomy."

I looked at him confused. "A what?" My brain didn't seem to want to function at the moment.

"It's an incision into the chest wall to drain your chest, you were havin' trouble before."

"Why do I have to be tied down?"

"Because you tried to leave Greg, you're badly injured and you only caused yourself more pain by gettin' up . . . and," Nick stopped a moment, unstrapping my left wrist to hold my hand tighter. "I can't lose you Greg . . . they were worried about the head injury you took too. You had severe cerebral contusions and they had operate..." Nick looked up at me a moment showing the sadness in his eyes before he looked down at the floor again.

"What else aren't you telling me? Nicky don't lie to me." I sternly warned him.

"Greg . . . they had to strap you down because you started to havin' seizures. It's part of the complications..."

"Seizures!" I snapped, completely shocked. "So I could be at risk of post traumatic epilepsy."

"I hate how smart you are." Nick said as he looked up at me again. "The doctor should be here soon to take you to have an MRI or a..."

"CT scan." I finished for him.

"Yeah," He nodded. "Do you remember what happened before?" I tried to think but I came up blank. "You had a panic attack. The doctor diagnosed you with PTSD. I told you, you shoulda got that checked out."

"I don't remember anything."

"Good for you." He smiled softly.

"You were here?"

"Yes . . . and that's the scariest thing I've ever had to watch." He held my hand slightly tighter, gazing into my eyes. "You saved your life by goin' into the stairwell G. You're whole floor was completely destroyed."

"So how bad is it? Besides the PTSD and the post traumatic epilepsy that is."

"Hey, they don't know that you actually have that yet. You haven't had a seizure all day."

"All day? How long have I been in here?" I asked shocked.

"Three . . . days."

"Three days. So it's . . . I'm 30 years old and I missed it."

"Bein' 30 isn't so great. You've still got the rest of the year to celebrate your thirtieth birthday."

"But it was yesterday. I'm already a day in and I'm probably gonna die..."

"No you're not Greg. Don't you dare talk like that! You're not gonna die, you can't give up on me like that." He shouted at me angrily, dropping his head into his hands.

"I'm sorry Nicky."

"Don't be sorry, just don't give up. You can't give up on me like that. I can't lose you."

"You won't."

"You're gonna live Greg. Say it!" He demanded, his voice swamped with emotion. "Say it Greg!"

"I-I'm gonna live."

"Good. Thank you. Don't you dare talk like that!" He shouted, still angry at me. I struggled to hold back my tears, but they freely flowed down my cheeks, running into my hair. Nick looked at me crying, starting to cry himself. He climbed to his feet, leaning over me to hug me tightly. I wrapped my one free arm around him tightly, smelling the soft scents of his hair as he rested right against me. "I'm sorry Greg. I'm so sorry." He cried into my shoulder, wetting the hospital t-shirt I wearing with his tears.

"You have nothing to be sorry for." I whispered, holding him tighter. "I'm sorry; of course I'm gonna live. Someone has to look after you Nicky."

"Is that right?" He chuckled softly, wiping the tears from his cheeks with his hand as he looked into my watery eyes. "You're the one to do that, huh?"

"Definitely, for starters I noticed your wearing odd socks . . . and you're t-shirts on inside out." I showed him the label sticking out from the front instead of the back.

"Opps. Guess I really do need you, huh?" He smiled softly, wiping the tears from my face with a tissue. "I'm sorry I shouted at you."

"I totally deserved it. So, have I really been asleep for three whole days?"

"No, you've been in and out of it."

"So . . . how bad is it? Tell me truthfully . . . is my hair a mess?" I turned it around for a joke.

Nick smiled looking at my hair. "Nah, it's not so bad. You might wonna consider washin' it though. The red and black splotches don't suit you well and the white bandana you're wearin' really doesn't go with your outfit." He joked, referring to the bandage around my head. Nick held my free hand in his, placing a delicate moist kiss to the back of my hand. "In all seriousness though G . . . you were lookin' pretty bad at first from the seizures and blocked lung passages . . . but the doctors think you have a better chance now than you did when you first came in."

"Benefits of being thirty, huh?" I smiled up at him.

"Must be," Softly stroking the back of my hand with his thumb, Nick began to contemplate on how he was going to tell me the rest.

"Truth . . . please Nicky. Just tell me the truth. I'll survive it, whatever it is. You know I will." I assured him.

"Well the worst of it was your brain trauma. You've cracked two ribs; you shouldn't be able to feel it though from the morphine. There was some shrapnel in your thigh that caused you to lose a lot of blood too, but they've had you on transfusions for the past few days, you've got a lot more colour in your cheeks now." He smiled slightly.

"What about my brain then? What did they tell you?"

"You're still smart," He smirked. "You don't have to worry about that. There could be some memory loss, headaches, blurred vision, chronic fatigue . . . as well as the seizures. But not all of this will happen to you. They said it's BINT or somethin' and these symptoms are usually latent."

"Blast Induced Neuro Trauma."

"See, you're still smart." He smiled softly.

"If I've been having seizures . . . does that mean they operated on me?"

"Yeah, they had to relieve some the pressure in your brain. They said everythin' went fine though. After your MRI or CT scan they'll be able to tell us more though. They don't know that you have epilepsy or any of that crap yet, so don't give up on me, okay?"

"I won't."

"Don't cry Greg." He whispered softly, wiping my tears away with his soft fingertips. "You're gonna be fine, I know you are because your strong. You didn't die of smoke inhalation or anythin', so I know you're gonna be fine."

"I'm not as strong as you think."

"I don't know, you do hit pretty hard." He smiled at me. "You've got somebody watchin' over you Bubba. You've survived so much; I don't think they want you to give up now."

"This is the first birthday I wasn't single too." I pointed out to him.

"That's a start." Chuckling softly, he smiled wider looking into my eyes. "I'll never leave you." He assured me then leant across the bed to kiss me. I closed my eyes as his lips gently brushed against mine, softly teasing his tongue inside my mouth. The pain from my injuries suddenly seemed to disappear under Nick's heavenly touch.

He was better than morphine.

"I'll never leave you, I promise." He panted across my lips. "You believe me doncha?"

I licked my lips looking up into his eyes. "Not really." I smiled up at him. "I still don't believe you."

Nick chuckled softly then kissed me again. He softly sucked on my lower lip, looking deep into my eyes. "I love you Greg, I don't want anythin' bad to happen to you. We're gonna find whoever did this to you, okay?"

"Okay. I believe you."

"You should." He softly kissed me again then licked his lips. "You're goin' to be okay Greg."

"Ah, Mr Sanders." The doctor announced from the doorway as he saw me awake. "Are we ready?" Nick nodded, tightly holding my hand. "Relax Mr Sanders. This won't hurt a bit." He assured me as they wheeled me off to have my CT scan. Nick had to let go of my hand outside the room, watching from the doorway as they set up the machine.

I looked out at Nick as they set everything up, seeing him mouth the words 'I love you' to me. I closed my eyes laying perfectly still as the machine started up, hoping for good results.

* * *

"Hey bud." Nick greeted me with his warm smile. I could see right through his smile at how scared he was though. He's not as good as hiding it as he thinks. "You have a nice sleep?"

"Did they get the results back yet?" Nick sighed heavily as he sat on the bed beside me, holding my hand in his lap. "I can take it Nicky."

"See, why do you always have to be so strong?" He smiled slightly, gripping my hand tighter. "They're bookin' you for surgery this afternoon. It's nothin' to worry about; they said they've seen much worse. But you've got the very best surgeon..."

"What is it?"

"Subdural hematoma. You're gonna be fine though G." He assured me. "It coulda been a lot worse though. You're lucky." Nick looked round at the door as he heard knocking. "Oh and your parents are here."

"My mom's not crying is she?"

"Not . . . right now, no." He checked. "Do you wonna see them?" I nodded, raising my hand to wipe the tears threatening to spill from my eyes.

Nick signalled for them to come in, taking a step back from my bed. As soon as my mom got in the room she started crying, immediately rushing to my bedside to hold me tightly. "I'm here sweetheart." She whispered, clutching me close. I closed my eyes, trying desperately not to cry but as soon as she started sobbing I broke instantly.

"Excuse me . . . Mr Sanders, we're ready for your surgery now." A doctor announced from the doorway.

My mom slowly pulled back, drying her eyes with a tissue. "We'll see you when you get out sweetheart." My dad gave me a warm smile as he pulled my mother into his arms to comfort her. I immediately turned my gaze to Nick as they started to wheel me out. He was trying desperately to hold it together, thinking he had to be strong for me.

"Wait!" I shouted to the doctors, reaching out for Nick's hand. "I love you Nick."

"I know . . . I love you too Greg." He struggled not to cry.

I reluctantly let go of his hand as they wheeled me away, hoping I would get to see him again. From some of the cases I worked, I knew that subdural hematoma was a common cause of death from the doc's autopsy reports and that the victim doesn't even know they have it, so I guess I was pretty lucky to have the doctors find it before I ended up on the docs table. I also knew that I'd be needing a craniotomy, a surgical operation to remove a fragment of my skull so they could access my brain. The worst part was I would have TBI, Traumatic Brain Injury.

A very severe disability in some cases.

"Okay Mr Sanders. Nothing to worry about. We're going to put you under general anaesthetic now." The doctor told me as they put the mask over my mouth. I began to feel dizzy and slight paralysis as the drug made its way through my system before I completely passed out.

My mind was suddenly swamped with darkness. I could feel an almost bone crushing pressure against my head, making it feel as though it was going to explode. My lungs became weaker and tighter as I struggled to meet my next breath. Gasping for more breath I felt a sharp pain in my head. I snapped my eyes open looking around the room. I was no longer in the hospital room and that wasn't the doctor standing over me.

I felt a cold sharp blade being dragged down my chest, cutting through every layer of skin, without me being able to move or scream for help. I looked up in shock as I saw Doc Robbins pulling my chest open like a waist coat. I looked in terror as he raised the bone saw to cut my ribs out, feeling the warm blood seeping down the sides of my body from the Y incision.

The bone saw made a loud buzzing noise as it carved straight through my ribs, splashing a thick coat of blood all across Doc Robbins, making him look like a butcher. He pulled my ribs out like they were nothing, tossing them aside then started poking around inside my chest. I began to choke on the blood in my throat as he cut through my organs, lifting them from my body.

My still beating heart was ripped from my chest, spilling blood all down Doc Robbins arm, leaving a large pool of blood on the floor as it struggled to beat in his hand. Continuing to gasp for breath I felt the surgical scissors tearing through my other organs.

The pain was white hot and unbearable, but I couldn't move or scream for help in any way.

I struggled to keep my eyes open as the darkness swamped over me once again. I struggled to scream as the torture continued. Sharp blades continued to slice their way through my body. The blood dripped from my body, pooling out onto the floor while the rest flooded my throat. My eyes refused to open as I heard another voice in the room. It was a voice I knew well but I couldn't make out the words they were saying.

_Why is this happening to me?_

I managed to open my eyes slightly, looking up to see Grissom stood over me. His blue overalls were coated in my blood as he inspected the inside of my body that was just an empty shell now. I fought to scream, but not even a single sound escaped my lips. I couldn't get up or move to escape this torture in any way then the saw came down to cut open my skull. Doc Robbins peeled back my skin like it was nothing, slicing through my skull into my brain. He plucked my brain from my skull, taking it over to another table to poke and probe at.

Grissom and Doc Robbins shared a laugh, but I couldn't hear what they were saying. _Why was this happening to me? You can't be autopsied if you're alive!_

The darkness once again consumed me.

I felt the white hot pain throughout my body still, unable to breathe, scream or move still from the excruciating pain that consumed my body. Just when I thought the pain couldn't get any worse, it did. I started to shake and tremble as I felt various sharp blades slicing through my arms and legs.

I managed to open my eyes again, looking up at Doc Robbins stitching my chest back up. I thought the pain would stop now he finished, but I could still feel the sharp needle piercing through my skin. I looked to my side seeing Nick stood beside me. At second glance I could see a small child stood at his feet.

His son!

He was an exact copy of Nick only slightly smaller in size. Then I saw Starla stood at his side with another baby in her hands. Without me Nick was happy. He had the perfect family life.

Doc Robbins replaced the cold paper blanket to my body, shoving me into the freezer lockup. My entire body felt cold and numb as I stared up at the metal ceiling above me feeling completely alone and terrified.

Then slowly, I started to wake up.

I was alive!

* * *

**AN:I did lots of research for possible injuries Greg could have. I tried to make it as accurate as possible and easy for you to understand, so I hope you like it. In the beginning Greg is acting a little crazy because he's disorientated. Greg is also suffering from PTS – Post Traumatic Seizures. It's quite common in severe brain injuries and can develop into PTE – Post Traumatic Epilepsy.**

**Some of the Terms I used:**

**TBI – Traumatic Brain Injury (also known as Intracranial injury)**

**BINT – Blast Induced Neuro Trauma**

**Thoracostomy – An incision made into the chest wall to provide an opening for the purpose of draining the smoke inhalition into a patients lungs. You have to get it out or they'll still have difficulty breathing.**

**Subdural hematoma – Bleeding of the brain. It can cause pressue on your brain if the blood builds up too much and can result in death.**

**PTSD – Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (Obviously if you've been paying attention you'll have noticed Greg is already showing symptoms of this throughout the story. It's a severe anxiety disorder that can develop after a traumatic event such as Greg almost being raped or involved in an explosion. The symptoms involve Flashbacks, Nausea, Muscle tension, sweating, pounding heart, feelings of distress, rapid breathing and feel as though their living through the event again.**

**Hope that explains everything and I hope I got it as accurate as possible :D**

**Please Review**


	38. Chapter 38

**Chapter Thirty Eight:**

"Morning!" A familiar looking man smiled at me as my eyes snapped open. I looked up at him shocked. This room wasn't one I recognised from the hospital. I'm not even sure we were at the hospital anymore. It appeared to be a bathroom of some sort. There were towels and soap containers with the name of a hotel on them and the bath, sink, shower and toilet were all spotless.

We were definitely in a hotel.

"You've been a real pain in the arse Mr Sanders." The man in front of me started talking as he knelt down in front of me. "The car bomb didn't kill you. The apartment explosion didn't kill you either. What are you invincible or something?" He smirked.

I looked down at my hands seeing they were handcuffed around the base of the sink. I struggled to move them, but they were securely fastened together. "What's that smell?" I asked, smelling some sort of alcohol or fuel around me.

"You really are a CSI." Chuckling harshly he reached for a can of gasoline behind him. "This is gasoline, the very, very flammable kind."

"Why are you doing this to me?" I asked him, looking around the room to try and determine which hotel I was in, but my vision was too blurred to read the name on the towels.

"Finding out where you are won't help you any Mr Sanders." He laughed louder. "You'll be long dead before anyone finds you."

"Why? Why are you doing this to me?" I demanded.

"You didn't figure that part out yet Mr Sanders?" He laughed again, shaking his head at me. "You can identify us. Me and my brother. You saw us leaving the crime scene. You may not know our names but it's enough to identify us." He simply explained.

"So I wasn't a target?"

"Not originally." Shaking his head he moved over to sit on the edge of the bath tub. "See the lawyer that you cleverly managed to identify from your first crime scene..."

"You stole our evidence?" I interrupted.

"Yep, easier than I thought too, you should really work on your security."

"Why?" I repeated. "Why did you do all this?"

"My brother, he's gonna go away for a very long time if I don't help him. So I got rid of the lawyer, the witness . . . now I just need to get rid of you . . . CSI Sanders. You're proving to be most difficult . . . first your boyfriend saves you then you somehow manage to escape the explosion from your apartment." He looked out the window as a helicopter flew over head. "So now . . . my final attempt."

"How did you even find me?"

"It was all on the news. They list everything on there. Your name, the apartment building that was blown up and the hospital you were brought into. I just had to flash my fake badge." He pulled it from his pocket to show me. "And they gave me the directions to your room. Like I said, you should really work on security."

"How did you get me out of the hospital though?" I asked, hearing movement in the room outside us.

"We waited until you got out of surgery. Once your boyfriend knew you were okay he went back to work with that pretty girl and the black guy then your parents went back home after they talked to your doctor and your doctors thought you were sleeping so they didn't notice us going in. Sorry about the head injury by the way. I meant it to be a clean kill." He explained, actually sounding slightly sympathetic.

He was obviously crazy!

"We wheeled you out of there in a stolen ambulance and no one even noticed. It hasn't even been on the radio or the news yet." He smiled at me. "Guess your unit isn't very advanced. They'll soon notice your missing . . . but you'll already be dead by the time they figure it out, another tragic mystery death of another unimportant CSI tech."

"Unimportant?" I pouted in shock, even though it was probably true.

"Well you can't be very important if it's been four hours and no one noticed you were gone." He smirked, climbing to his feet. He pulled a packet of cigarettes from his pocket, lighting one up even though there was gasoline all over the floor. "Want one?" He offered. I shook my head, leaning back against the wall behind me. I was still wearing hospital scrubs and I could still feel the bandage around my head. "You in pain yet?"

"No . . . what would you do if I was?"

"I don't know . . . got some aspirin." He joked, giving me a wide smile.

"What are you stalling for?" I asked curiously.

"Stalling? I'm not." He took another puff of his cigarette, flicking the ash into the bathtub. "I'm waiting for my brother to get back, if that's what you're wondering. I'm not going to change my mind. I'm sorry Greg . . . but you have to die."

"Hey!" Another voice shouted from the hotel room.

"What?" The man on the bathtub shouted back. The bathroom door burst open revealing the other man from the white van that was following me around. "What is it?"

"There's a cop car outside." The taller younger man told him with a hint of fear in his voice. "They're asking folk's questions."

"So, that doesn't mean they're looking for us." The smoker advised him. "This is Vegas; they could be here for any number of things." He flicked his cigarette out the window, closing it up tightly then took the other man off into the room to talk to him, closing the bathroom door behind him, but I could still just about make out their muffled voices. The younger man was telling the older one he didn't know if this was such a great idea. The older one was trying to convince him that as soon as I was dead they'd be free.

I struggled to slip my wrists from the handcuffs but they were on too tight. The sink base was too large and strong to kick out too, especially as I have the strength of a kitten right now! I tried to move my legs but they felt so stiff. My left leg was slightly stiffer than the other; I couldn't even wiggle my toes.

All I could do was just sit there and wait for my impending death.

I sat in silence wondering if I'd ever be remembered. I always wanted to be remembered for science. _Not this! _Remembered as the weak little victim who couldn't even defend himself while he was chained to the sink in the bathroom. _Good thing I don't have any kids._ They're class projects would be on their weak and feeble father who sat waiting to die.

I kept hoping that this was all a dream while I was under the anaesthetic. The first dream was weird enough but this one actually has other characters and surround sound. I could hear the traffic outside, people in the next room, even planes flying over head. _If this was a dream wouldn't I imagine a key in my hands? _I tried it... but no luck.

This was definitely real.

Is this seriously the end to my life? Or are a bunch of policemen about to storm through that very door and rescue me? Or possible even Nick, _he's got that hero complex_. I'm sure any second now he'll come bursting through that door... _Preferably wearing no top and those tight jeans of his that show off his gorgeous body curves._

While I'm at it I think I'll throw in a little more spice... _Nick kicks his way through that door, wearing a sexy fireman's helmet and those trousers they wear with the straps across his broad naked chest . . . ooh and the sprinklers are going off so his hairs dripping wet and his chest is drenched in water._

_Mmmm, now that's an entrance!_

"What are smiling at?" The man asked from the doorway.

"Nothing." I shook my head, leaning back against the wall.

"Good, you're not supposed to be smiling." He mumbled, leaving the door open as he head back into the bedroom to light up _another_ cigarette.

_I'm never gonna see Nick again! _I realised. These four walls are going to be the last thing I ever see. These four walls and those arrogant assholes sitting on the bed eating burgers while I wait for my death. _Don't I get a last meal? A last request? Last chance to see my family again_? To tell my mom I love her, even though she's annoying and tell my dad I love him, even if he did cheat on my mom and made her life unbearable for those years they were constantly at each other's throats...

But most of all . . . Nick.

I wanted to kiss him, to hold him in my arms one last time. I wanted to feel his warmth against my body or at least lay my head on his chest and listen to his heartbeat.

My heart started to pound even more. My eyes flooded with tears and my hands began to shake. It was like an uncontrollable force. My last few moments on this earth involved watching two men sitting on a bed, watching really bad porn and eating burgers.

_At least have the decency to kill me first!_

I rested my forehead against the side of the cold sink, wincing slightly as it made contact with the vulnerable skin beneath my bandage. _At least my surgery went okay. _They fixed me up to get killed again! I'd have preferred to go out by a gun to my head. That manner of death seems a lot less painful then the one they had planned for me. I was to sit and watch my skin melting off my body, with nothing to do but scream until it burnt out my throat so I couldn't make a sound.

"Get everything ready!" The older man ordered the younger one once they had finished their lunch.

_Inconsiderate! Someone's gotta teach these hostage takers some manners!_

He made his way back towards the bathroom, grabbing another can of gasoline and started to pour it all around the bedroom. I wondered what their plan was going to be. If I was going to kill someone I'd use a gun, it's so much more effective _then at least you know I'm dead. _But these guys didn't exactly seem the brainy type.

He looked at me with his cold dark eyes then threw a load of gasoline over me. I closed my eyes and my mouth as it ran down my head, feeling the wound in my head becoming itchy and irritated as the gasoline poured inside.

Once the can he was holding was empty he grabbed another, handing it over to his brother.

"What's your big plan?" I asked.

"Well first of all I thought I'd stop and tell you my plan." He remarked to me, chuckling with the younger man in the bedroom.

"I think I deserve to know how I'm going to die." I tried to reason with him, after all; what did I have to lose?

"Well I think for starters your family are going to want a closed casket ceremony. Would you like me to phone ahead?" He joked, retrieving another can of gasoline from the bathroom.

"What are you doing now?"

"Well . . . Greg, can I call you Greg?" Opening the last can of gasoline, he started to pour it over me, soaking my hospital scrubs even more with the flammable liquid. "I'm sure you can figure that out for yourself." He pulled a lighter from his pocket, waving the flame around in front of my face.

His eyes were still showing no emotion. They were so dark and cold. He really didn't care that he was about to burn me alive.

"See now I figure you're a smart boy Greg. So if I've coated you and this whole hotel room in gasoline . . . what do you thinks gonna happen?"

"Don't I get one last request?"

"I'm not a hostage taker Greg. I'm here to kill you, that's all." He coldly said, throwing another load of gasoline over me. I didn't close my eyes in time so the liquid made it to my eyes, making them sting and itch like crazy.

"Billy!" A voice shouted from the doorway.

I was relieved for the interruption, watching the older man in front of me snapping his lighter shut as his brother ran into the room.

"What? What's wrongs?" He shouted angrily.

"There's cops at the door."

"Why?" The man known as Billy climbed to his feet, heading off towards the door. "Keep him quiet." He pointed back to me. The other younger man nodded, heading into the bathroom where I was. He closed the door then knelt down in front of me, putting his finger to his lips. "Officers, how can I help you?" I heard Billy's muffled voice answer them.

I kicked the other man away from me with my right leg, with less strength then I intended as he tried to cover my mouth. "Help! Help!" I shouted as loud as I could. The man struggled to his feet, smacking me in the mouth with a hard clenched fist. He hit me so hard I felt as though he knocked all my teeth out. He struggled to silence me by placing his hand over my mouth, but I wriggled and squirmed away as much as I could, continuing to scream for help.

"Help! Help me!" I bit his hand as he tried to cover my mouth again, struggling to scream for help again, but I already heard the front door slam shut and loud gun fire erupting through the wood. Billy obviously got found out; either him or the cops were opening fire on each other.

"That's your version of keeping him quiet?" Billy angrily boomed as he stormed into the bathroom. "Get out there." He instructed, shoving the other man out of the door. "Now Greg, I'm very sorry about this. I'm sure you're actually a really nice person, but you can identify us, so we gotta kill you." He winked at me then made his way off out the bathroom, closing the door behind him, talking to the other man before all was quiet.

I heard the loud sirens outside, hoping this was my rescue and not my death. If the cops were outside these two wouldn't set the building alight with them still inside so my chances had greatly improved.

"Get in there and keep him quiet!" Billy angrily shouted at his brother.

The bathroom door burst open a few seconds later. The younger man came in and started searching through the draws and cupboards for something. He soon found what he was looking for; a pair of scissors.

His brother tossed him some duct tape, watching as he cut a few pieces of tape off, sticking them across my mouth so I couldn't make a sound. Luckily the tape wasn't sticking too good though since my face was drenched in gasoline so I could still get it off if I wanted to.

The younger man then pushed the bathroom door shut, taking a seat on the edge of the bath tub as instructed by his brother. This had just gone from a killing to a hostage situation. If they wanted to get out of here alive now they'd need me alive as leverage.

I looked up at the man with my puppy dog expression that no one could resist, hoping to get through to him since his brother seemed to be calling the shots on this one, I might be able to get his younger brother to stop this and let me go.

He stared at me a moment then forced himself to look away. My expression was definitely getting to him, but it wouldn't work if he looked away from me.

I stomped my right foot heavily on the ground to get his attention then motioned with my hand for him to come over. He looked around the room nervously then climbed off the bathtub, carefully stripping the soggy tape from my mouth.

"What?" He whispered.

I hadn't actually thought this through so I went with my instincts. "I need the bathroom."

"You can hold it." He huffed, going to tape my mouth up again.

"No, no. I really can't. I really have to go." I looked at him through the puppy dog eyes again, starting to get to him even more.

"Why are you talking?" His brother Billy suddenly burst in. "I told you not to talk to him."

"He needs the bathroom." He explained to his older brother.

"Loui, don't be stupid! He's trying to trick you. Tape him back up." He instructed. The younger brother now known as Loui did as instructed then sat back on the bathtub. They certainly weren't the brightest hostage takers in the world. I now knew them by first name and they couldn't kill me or they'd never get out of here alive.

"Okay Greg, help me out here." Billy knelt down in front of me, looking into my eyes. "Just sit tight. We're still going to kill you. That part hasn't changed so don't get your hopes up. I just need to figure out a plan to get me and my brother out of here. You're still gonna die!" He coldly assured me. I looked up at him, shaking my head in slow motion. "Yes you are!" I shook my head again as it was getting to him.

In a split second he lost his temper, going to strike out at me with a clenched fist.

"Billy, there's a sniper!" Loui shouted stopping him. Billy spun round to look where his brother was pointing.

"Get away from the window." He pushed his brother out the way, standing the other side of the window so if the snipers looked in they could only see me. "Damn it. This is all your fault Greg!" Billy angrily shouted over at me.

_Yeah right! My fault? I find that very hard to believe._

Billy and Loui stayed sat against the wall, either side of the window so they couldn't be seen.

The morphine in my system was starting to lose its energy and the anaesthetic had completely worn off. I didn't feel dizzy or sleepy anymore, but I could feel the pain of all my injuries steadily starting to increase.

The police sirens and speakers sounded louder now, less muffled and more headachy. I could see the laser sights of the snipers on the rooftops and smell all the very strong scents of the gasoline around me. I started to wonder if Nick was out there somewhere in the crowd, probably beating himself up over this thinking it was all his fault like he always does.

"Greg, stay awake!" Billy warned me. I tried but I was drained and ready to drop. Billy crawled across the floor to shake me awake. The sniper outside saw the action and aimed his sight directly at Billy.

"Billy!" Loui shouted in terror, climbing to his feet in front of the window. The bullet struck through the glass, striking Loui in the back, knocking him down to the ground as the blood sprayed across the floor.

"Noooo!" Billy shouted, ducking out the way of the window as the lasers tried to pinpoint him. "Loui! Noooo!" Tears started to pool down his cheeks as he watched the blood pooling from his brothers lifeless body. His angry gaze immediately turned to me. "This is all your fault!"

_Of all the nerve!_

Billy pulled the lighter from his pocket. I looked at him wide eyed as he went to light it. His circumstances had obviously changed and he was willing to give up his own life now.

I forced out my right leg with as much force as I could, knocking the unlit lighter from his hands. It bounced off the ground towards me, but I couldn't reach it as my hands were the other side of the sink.

Billy went to lunge for it as I struggled to cover it with my leg. As he moved out further to reach the lighter the snipers could get a sight on him. I closed my eyes as a bullet shattered through the window, missing Billy by mere millimetres and striking the tiled wall beside my head.

_Jeez! Are they trying to kill me too?_

"Give it!" Billy angrily shouted, pushing my leg out the way to reach the lighter. He quickly ducked out the way before the sniper could get a sight on him again, leaning back against the wall beside his brothers body. "Not a smart move Greg! Your stupid cop buddies almost killed you because of that little stunt!"

_Blaming it on me again! What is it with these people?_

"This is the Las Vegas police! We have the building surrounded." The familiar voice of Captain Brass echoed from the parking lot outside. "Give yourself up! There's no other way out of this!" But Billy had other ideas. He looked at the lighter in his hands then down at his brother's lifeless body. "We'll give you thirty seconds!" Brass announced seconds later. "Then we're coming in!" Billy looked over at me, holding the offending lighter in his hands, ready to ignite the gasoline around us.

_In less than thirty seconds this place will be up in flames and I'd be screaming in pain!_

"Thirty . . . twenty nine . . . twenty eight . . . twenty seven . . ." Billy's fingers started to twitch around the lighter. "Twenty six . . . twenty five . . . twenty four . . ."

"Sorry Greg." He whispered, flipping the top of the lighter open.

"Twenty three . . . twenty two . . . twenty one . . . twenty . . ." I heard the click of the flame igniting the liquid in his lighter, watching his trembling hand deciding whether to drop it or not. "Nineteen . . . eighteen . . . seventeen . . . sixteen . . . fifteen . . ." Billy must have decided he didn't want to die like this. He closed the lighter then started to crawl across the floor, beneath the sight of the window off towards the door to the bathroom. "Fourteen . . . thirteen . . . twelve . . . eleven . . . ten . . ." I thought he was going to try to escape, but instead he sat down on the floor by the foot of the bed, pulling his gun from his belt. He ejected the chamber to count the bullets inside then slotted it back in place. "Nine . . . eight . . . seven . . . six . . . five . . . four . . ." In one swift motion Billy relit the lighter, dropping it to the carpeted floor beneath him. The carpet went up instantly. "Three . . . Two . . ." The flames crawled across the floor, bedding, lighting up the furniture, climbing the curtains, crawling across the beds then across the carpeted floor towards me.

I heard a loud gun shot from Billy's gun as he pulled the gun to his head, spraying his brains and blood all across the flames on the bed behind him.

Thick black smoke started to gather in the room, making visibility poor, causing me to choke as it started to enter my lungs. The flames started to consume the bathroom floor, burning up the air around me, making it even more difficult to breathe.

_This was it . . . this was my death!_

I felt a white hot pain as the flames caught on the gasoline beneath me. My hospital scrubs were the first to light. The bright, white hot flames crawled across me like wild fire, searing my skin in its wake.

"Greg!" I distinctively heard the familiar Texan accent. "Greg!"

"Nicky." My voice came out as a dry whisper. I struggled to speak again but my throat was completely dried out.

He was too late though, my entire body was already up in flames. The darkness began to consume me, pulling me into the dark where I could no longer feel the pain of the fire or feel my skin melting away.

I heard a voice calling out to me from the darkness.

I fluttered my eyes open, watching a very manly, sexy looking figure climbing through the window of the bathroom. I looked up towards their face to see the stunningly handsome features of one Nicholas Stokes, climbing through the window in fire fighter gear, _but he wasn't topless_.

_There he goes again, being the big hero!_

Am I dreaming?

"Nicky, what are you doing here?"

"Savin' you, you think I wouldn't." He stepped over the broken glass, kneeling down beside me. He saw my hands were handcuffed, giving me that familiar look.

"Nick, you can't." I looked up as the door started to catch fire on this side, within a few seconds the flames would reach the gasoline setting us on fire. "Nick, you gotta get out of here."

"No, I'm not leavin' you!" He insisted, struggling to pull the handcuffs apart. When that didn't work he started with the pipe work, trying to find something he could pull apart to lift my hands free.

"Nick, please . . . just go. You can't die too!" I pleaded him to go.

"I'm not gonna leave you to die. I can't!" He shouted, searching the bathroom for something to break the lock. I watched him getting angrier by the second as he couldn't find anything. He angrily pounded his fist into the wall then dropped to his knees in front of me.

"Nick . . . please, you have to go. Please!" I begged him, but he wasn't listening. "Nick, you have to go."

"I can't leave you!" He shouted in frustration. "I already let you die once! I'm not doing it again."

"What? I'm dead?" I shrieked in shock. I looked around the bathroom realising it wasn't on fire. My hospital scrubs were still attached and my skin wasn't melted. The bathroom was as good as new and there wasn't even a body in the corner.

_Shit! I am dreaming._

I looked up towards the window seeing a sunny blue sky above. "You can't save me then Nick." I looked into his eyes, feeling the sadness in him as he looked at me with that adorable helpless expression. "I'm dead right, this isn't real?"

"No, you can't leave me!" He shouted, inching closer to me.

"But... how did you get here?" I cast my eye back to the door, seeing the flames weren't acting to their usual behaviour. They were just staying on the door, when in reality I knew they would catch me alight in seconds. "Nick, you can't save me. I'm already dead!"

"No Greg, you're not! I can't go. I can't leave you. I'm not goin' anywhere!"

"Please Nick..."

"Don't argue with me." He insisted, gently brushing his fingers down the side of my face. _His touch felt real enough. _"There's no way I'm leavin' you."

"God you are so stubborn!" I shouted at him.

"Did Jack leave Annie in Speed when she was handcuffed to the subway car?"

I looked at him wide eyed as the door started to shrivel up from the flames and the fire caught the walls and ceiling around us. "This is a little different."

"It's the same Greg."

"Well then if I'm Annie I'm going to have to insist you get out of here and save yourself. We can't both die." I tried to push him back but I was too weak to force him away. "Please Nick. Just go . . . I don't want to be the cause of you dying!"

"I'm not leavin' you either!" Nick sat down beside me, holding me in a tight loving embrace. "I can't just walk away and leave you here to die." The air around us became thicker with smoke. Nick clutched me tighter as the flames squealed with an ever expanding rush towards us. "I love you too much to just let you die Greg."

"Clear!" A strange voice shouted.

"Please! Come back to me Greg!" Nick shouted, clutching me tighter.

"Clear!" I felt a jolt of electricity surge through my body.

"Greg, you can't leave me. I'll wither and die without you. I need you!" Nick shouted louder, but he seemed so far away.

"Clear! We're gonna lose him!"

I could no longer feel Nick's touch against me. No longer feel his warmth, hear his voice or feel his warm breath on the back of my neck.

"Clear!"

* * *

**AN: In case you didn't guess, Greg was dreaming from the moment he saw Nick coming into the room. I was going to drag this out to two chapters, but I decided to shorten the hostage situation slightly since they didn't want Greg as a hostage they just wanted to kill him. I hope you like it and don't hate me for hurting Greg too much. I do love him really :D**

**How badly is Greg hurt? You'll have to keep reading and reviewing to find out!**


	39. Chapter 39

**Chapter Thirty Nine:**

As I opened my eyes I saw a bright white room around me. Four walls, one ceiling, all white.

_I must be in heaven!_

I turned my head to the side to see chairs and hospital equipment. _Nope, not heaven... hospital! _I groaned.

I suddenly remembered the hot flames that were consuming my body. I immediately sat up to look at myself. My forearms were covered in thick white bandages, I wasn't wearing a top, but the skin was only slightly reddish and sore. I swept back the covers next to look at the thick white bandages around my legs as well as large splints around my legs. I still had fingers and toes, feet and hands, so it can't have been that bad.

I looked up as the door opened, looking at the shocked expression on Nick's face.

_He seemed taller in my dream._

"Greg, you're awake!" Smiling in relief at me, he set down his coffee on the side then immediately came towards me to hug me tightly. I didn't care about the pain in my arms or chest, I just wanted to hold him tightly and never let go. "I thought I lost you." He whispered softly as he held me snugly against his chest.

"I thought I was never gonna see you again." I shivered against his chest, feeling goosebumps crawling up my neck.

"I'm here baby." I felt tears running down the side of my face, but they weren't coming from me.

Nick held me tightly for a moment longer, I never wanted him to let me go.

"Sorry." He pulled back from me slightly to check I was okay. "Are you okay Greg?" I nodded, smoothing my fingers through my hair.

_Oh thank god, I still have my hair!_

"What happened?" I croaked.

Nick helped me lie back against the pillows, gently pulling the covers back over me. He grabbed the water bottle with the straw in it off the side, helping me take a few sips. "You don't remember?" Sitting on the edge of the bed, he carefully lifted my hand to hold in his.

_And yes! I still have a penis! _I rejoiced as I felt the familiar tingles from the intimate touch.

"Do you remember the fire?" Nick softly spoke.

"Yeah . . . were you there?" Nick looked at me curiously then shook his head. "Then yeah . . . I remember the fire. Are Loui and Billy dead?"

"Who?" He looked at me confused.

"The brothers . . . are they dead, they're dead right?"

"The guys who kidnapped you, you mean? Yeah . . . yeah, they're dead G." Nodding, he tightened his grip on my hand. "We almost lost you too."

"I'm not about to let go just yet. I had a sexy fireman persuading me to live."

"Really?" Nick chuckled softly, still looking at me slightly confused.

"Yeah, he was gorgeous . . . he wouldn't leave my side even though I was gonna die . . . he wanted to die with me." Nick almost looked a little jealous. "It was you Nicky."

"Me? I wasn't in there with you G."

"Yeah, you were." I lifted his hand to rest on my cheek, melting under his intimate touch. "You climbed through the window in firemen's gear then you sat with me. You told me Jack never left Annie . . . so you weren't about to leave me."

Looking at me still confused, he gently brushed his thumb across my cracked lips. "Who's Jack and Annie G?"

"From Speed."

"Oh . . . Ooh!" He immediately got it. "I really said that to you?"

"Yep . . . I think someone should investigate Doc Robbins on his autopsy procedures too. He doesn't even bother to check that his patients are dead before he begins them."

"Huh?"

"He's like a butcher, he ripped my heart from my chest and he cut into my brain, poking and probing it while he was laughing with Grissom." Nick started to look at me wide eyed with confusion as I continued to talk. "I think we should start checking for ourselves to see if these victims are actually dead before they get to Doc Robbins table, who knows if he's really telling the truth about how they died."

"Greg..."

"I'm serious, we should investigate him Nicky. Maybe half these people aren't actually dead before he starts chopping em up. There's something about him that's just a little shifty... he really creeps me out."

"You dreamt that Doc Robbins was givin' you an autopsy?" Nick smiled, holding both of my hands in his. "Believe me I've had that same dream G; it's pretty freaky, huh? I couldn't look at Doc Robbins the same after that." He chuckled softly.

"Wait... that was a dream too?" I asked surprised. "Please tell me us hooking up wasn't a dream."

"No, that wasn't a dream. That... that was real." He smiled, gently rubbing his thumb across the back of my hand.

"So the fire . . . that was real?" Nick nodded. "How bad am I? I completely understand if you wonna start dating someone who doesn't look like a monster."

"You're not a monster Greg . . . you're beautiful." He planted a kiss to the back of my hand, looking up into my eyes. "Luckily the fire crew and paramedics got to you in time or you wouldn't be here now. They put out the fire before it did any real damage. You've got third degree burns to your legs though..."

"Skin grafts?"

Nick nodded slightly, watching my reaction. "The ones on your arms are only second degree burns; the skin should heal in a few weeks. They didn't have to amputate your hands or feet though." He softly spoke, slightly relieved as he pressed another kiss to the back of my hand. "Your wrists got it pretty bad too. Probably from the handcuffs but your hands didn't have to be amputated or anythin' like that. But none of the flames touched your face." He smiled up at me.

"So I've still got one of my assets." I joked.

"More than one I'd say." He chuckled, leaning across me to press a kiss to my forehead. "I don't know what I would have done without you G." I closed my eyes as he softly kissed my cracked lips. "You look tired G."

"I don't wonna sleep, I'm afraid that all this is just another part of my dream."

"It's not . . . this right here." Holding my hands tighter and looking into my eyes, he continued to prove to me that it was real by kissing me passionately. "See that, you're really here. This isn't a dream. There's no hunky fireman, no crazy doctors doin' autopsy's . . . it's just you and me. You're alive G, you came back to me."

"I'm sorry." I whispered as I started to cry.

"You have nothin' to be sorry for baby. You're alive, that's all that matters now. You're safe and I'm not goin' anywhere. I promise this time."

"It's not your fault Nicky."

He gently wiped away my tears with his thumb. "I'm not leavin' you this time Greg. Those guys are dead now, they can't getcha anymore." He planted another warm kiss to my forehead then to my dry cracked lips. "I love you Greg."

"Will you lay with me?" I asked, scooting over slightly to allow him some room to lay beside me. Nick looked round at the door then climbed onto the bed beside me. I lay on my side so he could lay flat then positioned myself against him with my head on his chest so I could listen to the soothing sound of his heartbeat.

That's all the proof I needed to know I was alive.

I closed my eyes as I listened to the soft beating of his heart, feeling relaxed for the first time. He gently circled his arms around me, making me feel safe and secure against his body. "I'm sorry." Nick whispered as I slowly began to fall asleep. "This shouldn't have happened to you baby."

* * *

I stayed in hospital for a further four weeks, crowded by doctors, nurses, surgeons, plastic surgeons, concerned friends and family members, not to mention the hovering boyfriend constantly asking if I needed anything. It was finally a relief to have a day off from them all, but instead I got visited by a physiotherapist. She was a fair skinned woman with light red hair; styled just like agent Scully's off the X-files. She must have been in her late forties, but she didn't have a wrinkle in sight.

She told me I'd have trouble using my hands and walking for a while from the injuries I sustained and that I'd need physiotherapy to strengthen my hands and legs muscles. She talked me through some of the exercise routines I'd need to start doing if I wanted to walk again then left me with some brochures and things to look through.

I glanced at the brochures, noticing on every page that the patients were old, like seventies and eighties old, finding it really difficult to turn the pages. I gave up tossing them aside angrily, waiting for Nick to show up. According to the clock he should have been here already. His shift ended half an hour ago and he always rushes straight to the hospital to see me once he's finished. I can tell because he's always exhausted and he never changes his clothes.

_Where is he when I really need him? _I can't eat by myself and I hate the nurses doing it, they make me feel like a baby!

Nick finally arrived an hour later with a wide smile on his face. "What are you so smiley about?" I asked him.

"Your doctors said they don't have to worry about you havin' seizures or anythin' now so you can come home." He excitedly announced, pressing a kiss to my forehead.

"I don't have a home to go home to." I reminded him.

"That's exactly why you're movin' in with me." He stated, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"You're serious?"

"Yep," He firmly nodded. "You're movin' in with me G, I don't care what people think or say, you're movin' in with me."

"But Nicky..."

"No but's," He interrupted me. "We've been datin' around five months now, so it's a little soon, but I honestly don't see myself with anyone else but you Greg."

"Nick..."

"Shh, I don't wonna hear any excuses G, unless you really don't wonna move in with me..."

"Nick!" I shouted in frustration. "Would you just shut up and listen to me a sec?" I demanded. He buttoned his lips shut, waiting for me to speak. "I can't walk Nick! I can't hold things, clench my fist, let alone stand up. I don't wonna be a burden to you."

"You won't be Greg and it's not permanent, the doctors said with some physiotherapy you could make a full recovery."

"_Could_ Nick, I may never walk again, let alone hold a pen!" I shouted at him, feeling a tear running down my cheek.

"You can't think like that Greg." He gently wiped away the tear from my cheek with his thumb. "You can wiggle your toes, right?" I tried then nodded to him. "See, your legs are just weakened baby, you _will_ walk again." He lifted my hand into his. "Now curl your fingers around mine." He instructed. I looked up into his eyes then attempted to curl my fingers around his. My fingers twitched slightly the more I concentrated. Nick's smile increased as my fingers curled slightly around his. "See Greg, don't give up. It's gonna take some time, but I'm not givin' up on yah. You can't give up on yourself either." He warned me. "I won't let you G, this is just a minor setback."

"It's not very minor Nicky, you realise I can't do anything for myself."

"Yep, I've taken some time off work, cleared it with Grissom too..."

"No Nicky..."

"I want to Greg. Let me help you." Gently brushing his thumb across my chin, he looked deep into my eyes. "I want to help you."

"Okay." I sighed softly. "When can we go?"

"I just gotta talk to your doctor a moment then we can go." Nick pressed a kiss to my forehead before he climbed of the bed. He gave me a reassuring smile as he head off out the room, disappearing off down the hall. He returned a few minutes later, stuffing a list of notes into his pocket then sat down beside me while we waited for the doctor to check me over once again before I could be discharged.

The nurse later came by with a wheelchair while the doctor talked some of the meds over with Nick. The doctor and Nick helped me into the wheelchair then finally discharged me so I could get out of there.

Nick drove us back to his apartment, lifting me into the wheelchair again once we arrived. We rode the elevator up to his apartment, which was actually really messy, completely unlike Nick. There were clothes flung over the sofa and dirty dishes around the kitchen along with a stale pizza box sat on the breakfast counter.

Nick wheeled me through to his bedroom, throwing back the covers and plumping up the cushions on his bed, while I sat helplessly in the wheelchair watching him. Nick then turned to me, lifting me up into his arms then onto the bed. He carefully readjusted me to a comfier position, lifting the covers up around me.

Nick folded away the wheelchair then closed the blinds so it was slightly darker in his room, so I could sleep. He stood awkwardly at the foot of the bed a moment trying to think of something to say.

"Shout if you need me."

"Where are you going?" I asked curiously.

"I was gonna clean up the place a bit." Nick looked around at some of his clothes on the floor. "Haven't exactly had time to do it. I've gotta buy you some more clothes too." He remembered.

"You can ask my mom if you need help Nicky, she'd love an excuse to help me." I watched Nick's awkwardness as he picked up some of his clothes in the room, avoiding direct eye contact with me as he did.

Struggling to a sitting position I watched the expression on his face. "Nicky, don't do this to yourself again."

"Do what?" He continued to avoid eye contact with me as he grabbed the clothes off the floor.

"Avoid the problem and blame yourself for starters." Nick climbed to his feet, looking up at me with clothes still in his hands. "Sit with me." I pointed to the empty space on the bed. Nick awkwardly looked around then dumped the clothes on the end of the bed, sitting down beside me. "Talk to me Nicky."

"I don't know what to say G."

"Say anything. Anything's better than nothing at all." I pleaded.

"Okay." He sighed heavily. "I feel as though this is _my _fault. If I had never..."

"Nick stop! This isn't your fault. It's not your fault at all." I shouted at him for doing this again.

"If I had never left you..."

"No Nicky, it's not your fault." I stopped him again, watching a tear gently rolling down his cheek.

"It is! If I had just stayed with you instead of goin' to the lab to find out who did that to your apartment, this would have never happened to you Greg!" He shouted as tears pooled from his eyes. "This is all my fault!"

"Nick, for god's sake! I..." I struggled to think of something to say. It wasn't his fault, but that wasn't going to stop him from blaming himself.

Instead I pulled him into my arms, hugging him tightly as he cried into my shoulder. Nick rarely ever let his guard down, let alone let me see his vulnerable side. He had been so strong the whole time I was in hospital so I let him cry it out rather than getting angry at him for blaming himself again.

_Stupid Hero Complex!_

I held Nick in my arms as he cried himself to sleep against me. Gently wiping the tears from his cheeks with my numb fingertips as he did. I looked at the innocent expression on his face while he was sleeping. He was a victim himself, but he always put on a brave front, either to protect himself or to stop people from getting in too close.

The Old Nick would have never opened up to me like this; he wouldn't be caught dead crying in front of people, especially me. He was a very discreet man about his personal feelings, but he was finally starting to open up to me.

I held him for a few more hours until he slowly started to wake up. He gently rubbed his sore eyes then looked up at me, an innocent expression plastered across his face once again.

"Sorry for the meltdown." He apologised, resting on his elbow beside my head.

"You don't have to apologise. You've been so strong for me Nicky; I wouldn't think you were human if you didn't break sometime."

A small smile spread across his lips.

He rested his head on my shoulder again, circling his arms around my body as he snuggled closer. I gently weaved my fingers through his soft hair as he relaxed against my chest. "You don't always have to be so strong around me Nicky, you are allowed to feel."

"I'm afraid." He whispered in a small voice.

"Of what?"

"I'll lose who I am."

"You're feelings don't define who you are Nicky. You are allowed to cry. It's a lot healthier than punching your fists into walls to relieve tension." I pointed out to him.

"See," Nick raised his head slightly to meet my gaze. "Why do you always have to be so strong? I'm supposed to be the one comfortin' you at a time like this."

"We can comfort each other. That's the way a relationship works Nicky. You are allowed to be the baby sometimes." I smiled sweetly at him. "Just because you're older than me doesn't mean it's your duty to protect me . . . I can protect you too Nicky." I lay his head back down on my shoulder, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. "Let it out baby, I'm here for you." I whispered softly.

For what seemed like an eternity he remained completely silent.

Lingering my fingertips across the small creases by his eye, I patiently waited for him to open up to me. Any other time I'd be wasting my time, but right now he was in an open vulnerable state; the perfect chance to get him to break down his barriers and let me in. Even for just a moment.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect you." He spoke softly into my neck.

"Who made it your job to protect me?" I wiped the tear away from under his eye, securely wrapping my arms around him.

"Don't you want me to be there for you?" He asked with a confused frown.

"I do . . . but you're no good to me if you're blaming yourself Nicky." I gently caressed the side of his face, looking into his eyes. "I love you Nick." I raised his chin slightly, softly kissing his parted ruby red lips. "But you're gonna drive me crazy if you keep blaming yourself for this."

"But..." I put my finger to his lips to silence him.

"It's over. We're here. Together. We survived. Just let it be."

Nick took a deep breath then pressed his lips to mine, engaging in a desperate needy kiss.

"You know what G?" He panted across my lips.

"What?"

"You totally should have been jammin' eye of the tiger there." He chuckled making me laugh too.

"Careful, you're trading your usual avoiding the subject to joking about it, like me."

"We balance each other out then G." He rested his head on my shoulder, burying his face in the crock of my neck again. "We really survived, huh?"

"Yep, coffins, explosions, fires, rapists, stalkers..."

"Okay G, you can stop anytime now." He smirked.

"Nothing can stop us Nicky. Unless this baby thing really tears us apart." I added.

"You're supposed to lighten the mood when people are down G."

"Maybe I should leave the comforting speeches to you." I smiled down at him.

"You were doin' pretty good," Nick softly sucked on my lower lip, lingering his lips against mine as he looked into my eyes. "You won't give up will you Greg? I swear this baby thing won't split us up. I don't want to lose you. Not again."

"I won't." I closed my eyes as he kissed me again, running my fingers through his hair.

It was the first make out session we'd had in weeks and it was heavenly.

* * *

"Greg, you've been layin' in bed for three days straight." Nick informed me as he crawled across the bed towards me. "Doncha wonna go and meet Priscilla today? She's supposed to be the best physiotherapist around."

"I don't want to, not today." I rolled on my side to face him. "I will go . . . just not today."

"The sooner you start the better." He tried to reason with me.

"I have a headache."

"Well why didn't you say so." Nick reached for the draw beside his bed that he had made into a medical draw since I moved in. He retrieved some pills that the doctor directed him to give me, grabbing the bottle of water off the side. I opened my mouth as he placed the pills on my tongue _as I couldn't hold them myself or I'd drop them._

Nick watched my expression as I sipped a mouthful of water through the straw in the bottle, swallowing back the pills. "Greg, what's the problem?"

"I need the bathroom." Nick climbed off the bed, going to help me to my feet. "Please stop Nick!" I snapped as he helped me. "I can't take this anymore."

"Take what?"

"This, I can't do anything for myself! I have legs but I can't walk! I have hands but I can't hold anything! I can't do anything! What's the point of me even living?"

"It's been three days and you're givin' up on me already?" I sat on the edge of the bed, folding my arms across my chest. "Greg, you're not paralysed . . . you can walk. Your muscles just need help to do it. You can't just expect everythin' to be back to normal. It's gonna take time . . . but you will walk again. You will be able to hold things without dropping them, I assure you." He struggled not to lose his temper with me, just like he had been doing for the past few days. "C'mon, you need the bathroom I'll help you." I reluctantly let him help me up, feeling even more helpless.

The next few days continued somewhat like this. Nick continued to help me, making me feel useless and helpless then at the end of the week he called Priscilla the physiotherapist to make a house visit, which really annoyed me.

Nick and Priscilla sat in the kitchen together talking, while I lay on the bed in the other room, listening to their conversation. Priscilla was talking to him about mood changes in TBI patients.

_Like she knows anything! There's nothing wrong with my mood!_

Nick came back into the bedroom a few minutes after she'd gone, sitting on the bed beside me. "I don't care what she said, I don't want to." I mumbled, folding my arms across my chest as I persisted on avoiding eye contact with him.

"Priscilla just wants to help you Greg."

"I can't do it!" I shouted, sitting up. "I can't do anything Nick."

"Yes you can. You haven't even tried."

"Why do you even want to be with me? I can't do anything!"

"God, you're so stubborn Greg!" He finally snapped. "You promised me you wouldn't give up. Yet here you are givin' up already. You haven't even tried physiotherapy. Priscilla said you should of started days ago... Dammit Greg! You made me shout at you too!" He cursed at himself under his breath. "Greg, this can help you walk again and you don't wonna do it? Do you want to lay in bed forever, being pushed around in a chair all your life? Do you know how many people stuck in a wheelchair would kill to be given the chance to walk again?"

"But Nicky..."

"And you're just gonna sit there and give up?" He continued. "I can't allow you to do that! I love you too damn much Greg!" Nick climbed off the bed then stormed off out the bedroom.

I stared down at my feet a moment, thinking over everything he said, realising I needed the bathroom too.

I closed my eyes as I fell back against the bed, wondering if he'd ever speak to me again. _Not that I blame him of course._

I decided I'd have to do it myself. I pulled the wheelchair towards me by my foot, shifting my weight to the edge of the bed. I struggled to lift myself into the chair, feeling my legs buckling underneath me as I crashed back into the chair.

_I made it!_

But now what?

I hooked my arm under my legs to lift them onto the foot rests then looked down at the wheels, trying to figure out a way to move them. I struggled to grip my hand around the tops of the wheels, wincing in agony as I struggled to push it forwards.

The more I tried the more frustrated I got as I wasn't going anyway.

"Dammit!" I shouted angrily, dropping my head into my hands.

_Crap! I need help._

I slumped back in the chair feeling tears pooling from my eyes. The tears continued to flow down my face, soaking me t-shirt as they dripped off my chin. I had never felt so emotionally vulnerable before in my life.

"Let me help you." Nick's voice startled me from the doorway. He dropped to his knees in front of me, wiping the tears from under my eyes. "Please Greg... let me help you. I only want to see you get better. I'm sorry I shouted at you, but you can't just give up on me like that."

I wiped my eyes with the backs of my hands then nodded slightly as my lower lip started to tremble.

Nick wrapped his arms around me, leaning up on his knees between my legs as he hugged me tightly, allowing me to cry into his shoulder.

* * *

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Should have another one up for you later today or tomorrow.**

**Thanks for all your reviews so far, I love to read them!**

**~ Holly :D**


	40. Chapter 40

**Chapter Forty:**

"Priscilla's really nice and she only cares about gettin' you back to health." Nick explained as he continued to prepare us some lunch while I sat at the table, resting my head in my hands.

"Nick, I already said I'd do it. You don't have to keep selling me on it."

"I know." Nick walked round the table to press a kiss to my forehead. "I just don't want you to change your mind. I hated doin' that to you yesterday."

"I deserved it." I smiled up at him. "I'll do it, but you have to do one thing for me."

"Name it."

"I want you to go back to work."

"What? No, Greg . . . you need me here."

"No I don't, you're suffocating me Nick. You won't even let me fluff up my own pillow."

"I know that, but..."

"Shh." I cut him off. "You make me feel completely helpless Nick. I can't even take my socks off without you insisting on helping me."

"Sorry, I can't bare to see you suffer though."

"Priscilla said the more I do, the stronger my muscles will become right?" Nick nodded. "You won't let me do anything Nick."

"I'm really am sorry Greg. I just don't want you to suffer anymore. You've been through enough."

"P-lease . . . this doesn't even come close to the torture you were put through in that coffin. This is just a stupid side effect to my stupid brain trauma and being coated in gasoline then set on fire . . . nothing unfixable." I smiled up at him.

"You make a fair point." He nodded. "But, I'm not goin' back to work..."

"Nick." I groaned.

"No I'll only go back to work when I know your safe here by yourself. You can't even get in and out of bed by yourself safely."

"Nick, my mom lives two blocks away. I think I'll be fine."

"No G, that's my terms. As soon as you're stronger . . . then I'll go back to work, but not before. I'll back off okay? I'll let you take an hour to pull one sock off..."

"Don't be making funny of me Nicholas Stokes." I warned him with a wide smile.

"I worry because I love you Greg. I hate seein' you suffer."

"I love you too Nick. But you gotta back off a little."

"I will."

"But you have to come with me to this physiotherapy stuff." I added. "There's no way I'm going alone."

"I wouldn't let you go alone." Nick smiled, kissing me on the forehead again. I leant on my elbows again, watching him continuing to make lunch.

"Nick . . . I'm not hungry."

"Greg, you haven't eaten since yesterday." He looked up at me, still continuing to cook the pasta. "C'mon, you can eat a little. We'll watch TV." He suggested, heading off to the front room to turn the TV on. He came back a few minutes later to serve up our lunch, carrying it off through to the front room before he came back for me. "What?" He asked me.

"Nicky, you really don't have to do this."

"Yes, I do." He wheeled me off to the front room then lifted me into his arms as he sat down on the sofa, resting me against his body. He set the plate down on my lap then handed me a fork, curling my fingers around the handle with his so I wouldn't drop it.

"Thank you." I whispered softly.

"You don't have to thank me Greg." He pressed a soft kiss the back of my neck then helped me with another mouthful. Every time he let go I felt as though as I was going to drop the fork, but he curled his fingers right back around mine each time.

Being able to feed myself again for the first time since I got out of hospital gave me a slight sense of closure. An uncontrollable smile spread across my lips as I finished the last mouthful.

There was no way I was giving up now.

The next day we set off for the physiotherapy clinic to see Priscilla. Nick helped me get dressed then wheeled me off down to the parking lot. "Hey, doesn't Starla have a doctor's appointment today?" I asked curiously.

"Yep," He nodded, wheeling me off towards his car.

"Why aren't you going?"

"I told her I had somethin' more important to do."

"You can't cancel because of me."

"I can G. I'm a part time father, but I'm a full time boyfriend." He concluded, helping me into the passenger seat of his car then loaded the chair into the back.

"Why do you have my Marilyn Manson CD's?" I asked as I saw a few of them stuffed in the glove compartment.

"They're growin' on me." He smiled at me as he started the car. "I kinda like this one the best." He skipped ahead a few tracks to 'Disposable Teens' then started off towards the clinic.

"You don't have to listen to this because of me. I don't want any special treatment Nick."

"It's not. I know you don't want special treatment. I'm serious; this music is really growin' on me." He assured me with another wide smile.

We soon arrived at the clinic, parking in the handicapped bay. _As if being completely taken care of by my boyfriend wasn't humiliating enough._

Nick helped me into the chair again then wheeled me off into the facility that looked somewhat like a gym for the handicapped. Surprisingly there wasn't a single old guy in sight even though the brochure was full of them.

"Ah hello there." Priscilla smiled widely as she rushed to greet us. "Hi Greg, I'm Doctor Priscilla Hannigan, do you remember me from the hospital?" She smiled warmly, extending her hand to shake mine. I looked at her hand then up into her eyes, reluctantly returning the handshake. "Okay, today I think we'll just show you all the different exercise routines. Some of these you can try at home for yourself Greg to strengthen your muscles and some of them you'll need Nick's help for. I can also show you a few things you can do to help Greg." She informed Nick. "Follow me and I'll show you a few of the routines." She instructed, heading off through the gym.

Nick wheeled me off after her, stopping as she stopped by a young girl with her left leg all in a brace. "Sally this is Nick and Greg." She pointed us out. "Can you show them what you're doing here." The little girl nodded then started to walk across the raised floor, holding the parallel rails either side of her. "You'll be doing this within a week Greg." Priscilla informed me then started to move round the gym to explain the pieces of equipment.

Once she was done in the gym, showing me everything _I couldn't do but kids half my size could,_ she took me into one of the back rooms that had an examination table up against the wall, a desk and three chairs. She sat down behind her desk, going through some things in her draws then handed Nick a few flyers.

"Here's just a few exercises you can try at home. Make sure he doesn't overdo it though." Priscilla cautioned Nick as he took a seat in front of her desk. "Now Greg, would you like to try a few things today?" She asked turning to me. I couldn't say no as Nick looked round at me and I did promise him.

"Okay." I nodded slightly.

"Have you tried to move your legs or stand?" Priscilla asked, walking round the desk towards me. I shook my head in shame. "Don't worry about it; we'll get you walking in no time Greg." She smiled warmly at me, making it even more difficult for me to hate her. "Do you want to try standing?" She asked. "It's the most easiest thing to try and you won't fall, don't worry about that." I looked over at Nick again then nodded. "Okay, just slide your bottom to the edge of the chair and place your feet firmly on the floor."

_Jeez I know how to stand up! I've been doing it thirty years now! _I complained in my head as I followed her instructions.

"Okay, now place your hands on the arm rests of your chair." She clicked the brake in place then took a step back. "Lean forwards so your nose is over your toes. Push down using your arms to stabilise your weight off the chair. Don't worry; you're not going to fall." She assured me again. "Now slowly begin to straighten your legs, supporting all your weight by pushing down on your arms. Very Good." She nodded as I struggled to do it. "Now fully straighten your legs, let go of the chair. It's okay." She smiled warmly at me. I let go of the chair, struggling to straighten my legs as I stood up straight, feeling oddly dizzy and queasy. "Very good!" She clapped with excitement.

_God make me feel like a child why don't you!_

"I bet you didn't expect to do that your first session, huh? Standing's the easy part; we'll work on your balance and get you walking in no time though." She supported me as I sat down again, giving me another wide smile. "We've got a series of exercises for your hands too. Can you make a fist with both hands Greg?" She asked sitting on the edge of her desk.

I raised my hands, managing to almost completely clench the left hand into a fist, but my right hand my fingers wouldn't fold all the way down.

Priscilla then showed Nick a few things he could do to help me with my exercises before we head off home. I tried the standing attempt a few more times with Nick proudly watching me.

"I haven't seen you smile like that in a while G." He admitted to me. "See, physiotherapy ain't so bad after all, huh?"

"P-lease, people have been standing for centuries, just because she has a degree in making people stand, doesn't make her special."

Nick laughed shaking his head at me. "Well she put a smile on your face, gotta thank her for that." Nick knelt down in front of my chair, placing his hands on my knees. "I'm proud of you baby." Leaning forwards he gently kissed me on the lips, leaving me wanting more as he pulled back.

"That's my reward for standing, huh? What do I get when I start walking?"

"You'll see." Nick winked. "Don't forget the hand exercises too."

"I know one really good hand exercise." I cheekily wiggled my eyebrows up at him.

"No." He warned me through a smile. "No sex until I see some improvement."

"That's not fair." I pouted.

"It'll make you work twice as hard if you want it so bad." He teased me.

* * *

Over the next week I worked with Priscilla, working on light exercises to bend and straighten my legs as well as lifting cups off tables and curling my fingers individually. Nick finally went back to work so he stopped crowding me, making me feel less useless, but instead he called my mother over to look after me, which was even more humiliating, but she can cook better than Nick so I managed to tolerate her for the rest of the day.

Nick finally managed to get the weekend off the next week. He sat at the table watching me lifting rice grains from one bowl into another with a wide smile on his face. I could only do it perfectly with my left hand for now. My right hand I usually ended up dropping every grain.

"Priscilla said you should try it with different fingers too G." Nick pointed out to me.

"Don't congratulate me for lifting 163 grains of rice of nothing." I smirked up at him.

"Well done Greg!" He smiled widely at me. "You still have to try it with different fingers though and your other hand."

"In time. Do you have any plastic cups?"

"That's we." He corrected, climbing to his feet. "You live here too Greg." He informed me as he searched the kitchen cupboards.

"I don't pay rent." I pointed out to him. "You can ask me yah know."

"To pay rent." Nick retrieved some plastic cups from the cupboard, placing them down on the table in front of me.

"Can you half fill one with water?"

Nick nodded with a curious frown on his face. He half filled one cup with water then set it down on the table in front of me, returning to his seat. "You want me to ask you to pay rent?"

"I can't live here if you're paying for everything Nick. You don't have to be afraid to ask me. Just I won't be signing any cheques as I'm a righty so it'll be cash in hand."

"You don't have to Greg." He leant on his elbow watching me. "Not until your better."

"There's one guy at the clinic that's been in physiotherapy for three years. That's a lot of rent." I pointed out to him, lifting the cup of water in my left hand without dropping it and pouring the water into one of the other plastic cups.

"Yeah, but you've been in physio three weeks. You can nearly stand up straight, within no time you'll be walkin' and your hands are showin' great improvement. Maybe this guy doesn't push himself as much?"

"What are you gonna do with me when Starla has the baby?" I asked curiously.

"Do?" Nick asked with a confused frown.

"Well she's gonna come over here right? So you can see your child. What are you gonna do with me when she does?"

"Nothin', you're stayin' right here G. I doubt the baby will be over here durin' it's first few months anyway. I'll probably go over hers if I wonna see the kid." Nick watched me as I attempted to pour the water into the empty cup with my right hand. He caught the cup before I spilt water everywhere, setting it down on the table. "You didn't think I'd stuff you in a closet or somethin' did yah?" He smirked.

I shrugged looking up at him. "Did you really take the weekend off to watch me lifting rice grains and pour water from one cup to another?"

"No, I took the weekend off to spend some time with my boyfriend." He told me with a warm smile.

"Do you have any sugar?"

"We Greg, do we have any sugar." He corrected, climbing to his feet again.

"I'm not in physiotherapy for my pronouns." I smiled up at him. Nick rolled his eyes getting the sugar out of the cupboard. "And two bowls please?" I requested.

"Priscilla said to practice regularly, but she didn't mean one after the other G." He set the sugar on the table then got out two bowls.

"And a spoon." I added before he sat down. "If I can get my hands working again then my mother doesn't have to babysit me while you go to work and Grissom would let me back to work in the lab."

"That's why your doin' all this?" Nick sat down again, handing over the spoon. "You're supposed to be doin' it for yourself G."

"It is for me. My mom's great and all, but she's a little over helpful. I can't get through one commercial on the TV without her asking if I need anything or if my pillow needs plumping up. I can't even count the amount of times she asks if I need the bathroom. She makes me feel like a child."

"I'm sorry G." Nick leant on his elbow again as he watched me with a proud smile on his face. "Think you can do chop sticks now?" He suggested.

"You offering to buy me dinner? And I was really looking forward to overcooked steaks and crunchy chips." I teased him.

"Okay, so I'm not that good at cookin' chips. Those last steaks I made were okay and you always love my fajitas."

"Coz that's about the only thing you don't ruin." I chuckled. "I'm kidding Nicky, that pizza you cooked the other day was perfect."

"Course it was, I just threw it in the oven and set the timer, that's easy."

"That's another good thing about getting my hands up to shape again. I can start cooking again."

"I can't be that terrible G." He pouted, leaning further onto his elbow.

"Let's just say _some _of your cooking needs improvement."

"Okay then... what's your absolute favourite meal Greg?"

"Rack of lamb, why?" Nick walked over to one of his cupboards, retrieving a cook book. He sat down at the table with the books as he searched for a recipe. "I can give you instructions if you want?"

"Nope, you just kept doin' whatcha doin' G." He insisted, finding the right page. He grabbed a piece of paper and a pen writing out a quick shopping list. "You need anythin' else while I'm out?"

"Do you... I mean _we _have any rubber bands?" Nick shook his head. "Rubber bands then."

"What do you need rubber bands for?"

"It's supposed to strengthen your finger muscles if you pull it apart."

"Okay." Nick nodded, adding it to the list. "Be back in about twenty minutes or so." He leant across the table to kiss me before he turned to leave.

"I'm still paying rent." I shouted after him.

"No you're not!" He exclaimed back as he left the apartment.

He returned about half an hour later, handing me the box of rubber bands then started to make dinner. I leant on my elbow as I watched him checking back to the cook book every few seconds. "Do you need help?" I asked him.

"Nope, I got it." He walked over to one of the bags of shopping, pulling something out and hiding it behind his back. "I got you a treat too."

"You did?" I asked surprised. "Is it sugary or chocolaty?"

"Kinda both." He pressed a kiss to my forehead then handed me a bag of M&M's.

"Treats before dinner?" I melodramatically gasped. "What will my mother say about this?"

"We won't tell her. Don't eat them all at once." He pressed a kiss to my lips then returned to his cooking. I stayed sat at the table while he did, struggling to open the bag of M&M's with my weakened fingers. "You need help?"

"No, I can do it." I insisted, biting my lower lip as I tried to concentrate.

"Greg," Nick walked towards me, leaning on the opposite side of the table. "Do you want me to help you?"

"No, I can do it." He went to reach for it as he saw me struggling, but I stopped him. "No, no. Don't open it."

"Greg, you are allowed to ask for help."

"I can do it. Go and cook." I shunned him away, holding the packet out of his reach. Nick reluctantly walked away, continuing with what he was doing while he watched me out of the corner of his eye.

We sat down together to eat the delicious Rack of Lamb he so brilliantly prepared then I struggled with the packet of M&M's again, refusing to give up or let Nick help me. I even took them into the bedroom to fiddle with while Nick cleared up. The stupid packet just wouldn't open and my fingers were starting to turn red, but I wasn't going to give up.

"Greg," Nick sat on the bed beside me, closing his hands around mine. "Do you want me to open it for you?"

"No, I can do it."

Nick pulled the packet from my hands, tossing it onto the bedside table. He opened the side draw, pulling out a condom and placed it in my hands instead. "Try this one." I looked up at him curiously. "I want you inside of me Greg." He leant over me to kiss me, gently cupping my chin in his hand.

"What do you mean?"

"I want you... inside of me." He clearly stated again then climbed off the bed to shed his clothes. He climbed back on top of me with nothing but his boxers on, pressing slow seductive kisses to my jaw line and lips. "Do you want to?"

"Are you sure?"

"More than sure," He nodded, sliding his hands beneath my t-shirt. "Do you want me?"

I looked at the condom in my hands then up into Nick's lustful eyes. "Yes . . . yes I want you."

"Take me then." He lifted my t-shirt up over my head then started to fiddle with my belt, removing my jeans and boxers before he shed his own.

I struggled with the condom wrapper with my stupid fingers that wouldn't grip it tightly. Nick closed his hands around mine, helping me strip it open. "Let me do it." He whispered. I leant back on my elbows, watching as Nick rolled the condom down my hardened length. He grabbed the lubricant off the side, smoothing a decent amount down my erection. He opened himself up with the lubricant then lay down beside me, facing away from me.

"Nick, I've never..."

"Just take it slow." He instructed. He reached for my hand, placing it on his hip as I rolled behind him to spoon him. "Don't worry. It's the first time for both of us. It's meant to be awkward." He assured me.

"Okay." I took a deep breath then gently pushed myself into Nick. He winced slightly as I did, moaning as I entered deeper into his tight entrance. There was a slight resistance at first, but his body soon welcomed me, pulling me deeper inside his body.

I wrapped my arms around him tightly as he backed himself up on me, feeling his warm body tightening around me before I started to slowly thrust my hips towards him, egged on by his desperate moans. Nick completely gave himself over to me, reigniting the bond between us.

I felt like I finally had control of my life and Nick had given it to me.

* * *

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter.**


	41. Chapter 41

**Chapter Forty One:**

Within three more weeks I was using knives and forks, changing the TV channel for myself and started to cook once again, under supervision of course in case I burnt myself.

Things were really starting to look up.

Then everything changed. Nick came by the physiotherapy centre after his shift at work like he usually does, watching me walking with the aid of the parallel bars and my leg braces. I tried to put as little weight as possible on the bars like Priscilla instructed me to, transferring the weight to my legs, trying to walk as normal but it seemed a lot more difficult than I thought, but with Nick watching me it motivated me to push myself harder.

Nick drove us back home after; helping me out of the car like he usually does then a stern voice broke the calming silence of the parking lot, sending chills up my spine.

"Nicholas!" It rasped once again in a very thick Texan accent.

"Dad." Nick gasped in shock. He helped me into the wheelchair then braced himself as his father walked over towards us. Mr Stokes looked at me a moment, casting his eyes to the chair I was sat in with a look of disgust.

"Nicholas! What the hell is goin' on?" He demanded in an angry tone.

"Regardin' what?" Nick asked confused.

"Starla. She told us you've missed every appointment in the last two months and you're ignorin' her phone calls. You thinkin' of abandonin' her and your child?"

Nick stuffed his hands into his pockets, trying to think up an explanation. His mother climbed out the car and rushed over to join us as she saw the look on her sons face.

"Did he tell you what's goin' on?" Jillian Stokes asked her husband, casting an eye at me too.

_Jeez! Discrimination against the disabled!_

"No!" The Judge boomed. "Nicholas, answer me!"

"I can't." Nick looked at me then took a deep breath. "Greg's more important to me than the baby right now." He explained, causing his parents to look at me wide eyed.

"Is this Greg?" Jillian asked, pointing an accusing finger at me.

"Yes. This is Greg Sanders; he works at the crime lab too."

"You're lookin' after a cripple instead of your child?" The Judge boomed at him.

I felt hurt by his statement. I knew I shouldn't have said anything, but I couldn't keep my anger in. "Hey I'm not a..."

"He's not cripple." Nick finished for me. "Greg got hurt, I've been lookin' after him . . . and we..." I shook my head at him as he was considering to tell his parents that we were in fact lovers.

"You what?" The Judge demanded. "Nicholas, tell us what's goin' on! Are you really takin' time out of your career to look after some cripple and neglect your unborn child too."

"He's not a cripple!" Nick shouted angrily. "He's my boyfriend!"

_Uh oh! Way to go Stokes. _I rolled my eyes at him.

I watched the blood draining from his parents faces. Mrs Stokes looked especially pale.

They both stood in silence for what seemed like an eternity. They both looked shocked, confused and slightly queasy.

_That wasn't exactly the best way to tell your parents I'm your boyfriend. _I thought to myself as I looked up at Nick.

"He's your what?" Jillian asked completely baffled.

"Best friend." I shouted before Nick could speak. "I'm his _best_ friend and I'm a boy so..."

"No Greg, they have the right to know. Greg's my boyfriend. We've been datin' nearly eight months now."

"While Starla was pregnant!" The Judge shouted angrily. "You've... you've... completely sinned yourself here Nicholas. As if leavin' your wife wasn't bad enough. Now you're bangin' cripples?"

"I'm not a cripple!" I shouted angrily, getting an evil look from the Judge.

_I think I'd prefer to be called little right now instead of a cripple._

"Nicholas, can we talk to you alone a moment?" He requested, casting an eye towards his son.

"No, I'm not leavin' Greg. Whatever you have to say then say it." Nick instructed, stubbornly folding his arms across his chest.

"How could you do this to us Nicholas?" Jillian asked on the verge of tears.

"I haven't done anythin' to you. I'm gay. I can't help it. Greg's my boyfriend and I love him. And he's not a cripple!" He added, putting a smile on my face. "I've been meanin' to tell you for a while, but after Greg got hurt he was my priority."

"How many others have there been?" Jillian asked in disgust as she cast her disapproving eyes back to me.

"None, Greg's the first. He's the first person I've ever loved too."

"What about Starla?" The Judge demanded. "Was your whole marriage a fake?"

"Yes." Nick sheepishly nodded. "I never loved her. I didn't want to have a child with her..."

"Tough!" The Judge spat at him. "You've made mistakes Nicholas. You can't just abandon this child. It's your blood..."

"Might not be." Nick defended himself.

"You can't do this Nicholas." Jillian pleaded her youngest child.

I started to wonder how much longer this was going to take as I was dying to pee here. I had held it in my whole physiotherapy session because I hate asking Priscilla to help me, even though she insists. It's even more embarrassment then I can stand, asking a 48 year old woman to help me pee.

_It should be the other way around!_

Within a few seconds Jillian started to cry and the Judge started to shout. I blocked out his voice staring up at Nick. He looked like a scared little boy being yelled at by his father for doing something wrong.

I had to think of something and fast.

_I could fake a seizure._ I'll probably hurt myself and freak Nick out though. _Faint! _No, I'm sitting down. How am I supposed to faint if I'm sitting down? It won't be as dramatic.

Then I heard Nick's father call me a cripple again, making me completely lose my temper.

"Okay, enough with the cripple business!" I placed my hands on the arm rests, placing my feet firmly on the floor then struggled to stand.

"Greg, what are you doin'?" Nick rushed to support me but I pushed him away.

"I... am not... a cripple." I winced as I struggled to stand, letting go of the chair and standing up straight. "See. Nick hasn't done anything wrong. He's just following his heart..."

"Well he..."

"Shh." I silenced the Judge, getting a shocked look from Nick. _Clearly no one had ever spoken to him like that before. _"You are the sinners. You're damning your son to hell for looking after me. Without Nick I would have given up, I wouldn't even be able to stand or clench my fist if it wasn't for him. And you looked at me in disgust from the moment you came over here, before you knew he was sleeping with me."

"Greg, not makin' it better." Nick whispered to me as his mothers jaw dropped.

"My point is... your sinners, the both of you. You wrote me off as a person the moment you saw me in a wheelchair." The Stokes's shamefully hung their heads in shame. "Nick is always looking out for other people, he cares more for anyone else then he does for his own life, so for you to say he's going to hell for helping me... that's just..." I struggled to think of the words.

"Wrong?" Jillian Stokes questioned as a tear rolled down her cheek again. "I'm sorry Greg; I didn't mean to look at you like that."

"Thank you." I looked at the Judge, but he clearly wasn't going to apologise.

My knees suddenly buckled underneath me. Nick managed to catch me in his arms before I hit the ground, pulling me back towards the chair.

"Oh my goodness! Is he okay?" Jillian shrieked, immediately stopping her tears.

"I better get him upstairs." Nick informed them, setting my feet down on the rests as he started to wheel me off.

"Nicholas, we were talkin' here!" The Judge boomed at him.

"You're not even listenin' to me though Dad! I tell you I've found the one I love and all you care about is how people will look at you if they found out your son was gay. If that's how you feel..." Nick stood a soothing deep breath as his lower lip started to tremble. "Then I'm not your son anymore, you don't have to worry about the queer ruinin' the Stokes name, because I'm not longer a Stokes!" Nick locked his car then wheeled me off towards the elevator, leaving his shocked parents in the parking lot.

I looked up at him completely shocked as the elevator doors closed. _What was I supposed to call him now?_

Nicholas...

_Hmmm..._

"What Greg?" He asked, turning to face me.

"I didn't say anything."

"No, but you've got that look on your face like you want to, but you're not sure how I'll react." He knelt down in front of me, placing his hands on my knees. "Nice plan by the way."

I smiled up at him, giving out a slight chuckle. "That actually wasn't part of my plan. My knees really gave out."

"I meant the talkin' part. No one ever talks to my dad like that."

"Well your plan of coming out to your parents there and then completely sucked so I had to think of a backup plan." I grinned down at him. "But Nicky, you just wrote yourself off as his son, usually it's the other way around."

"I thought I'd say it before he did." He winked, pressing a kiss to my lips. "How about we try out the leg braces and crutches from now on? Strengthen your legs?" He suggested, wheeling me off into his apartment as the doors opened. "Priscilla said your legs are really improvin', you just need to work on your balance and managing your weight before you strengthen the muscles even more."

"I don't like em."

"It's not about likin' them or not G. They'll support your legs so you can stand better and start walkin' again. C'mon, we'll try em tonight."

"But then I have to use a walker." I pouted as he wheeled me through to the bedroom.

"Walker or crutches G." He corrected, helping me up from the chair to sit on the edge of the bed. "Priscilla thinks it's the best thing for you." Nick persisted, heading off to retrieve them. I hated the fitting session with the leg braces; I knew I wasn't going to like wearing them but he was so determined to make me try them.

"Nick, your avoiding the subject of your father again!" I shouted after him.

A few seconds later he returned with the dreaded robot looking device in his hands. They looked so ugly. They had huge hinges on each side of the ankle parts, lots of black straps to secure around my legs and two of them strapped around the inside of my legs to my waist, holding my crotch hostage! There was also a few large leather buckles to fit to my legs. On the top was a large leather band that was supposed to go around my waist and on the bottom a pair of my sneakers they had modified to attach to the braces.

Nick pulled off the sneakers I was wearing, tossing them aside. "Lie back G." Priscilla and the orthotist had shown him how to put the braces on me and like the true perfectionist he is, he paid full attention, doing it exactly as instructed.

I lay down on the bed while he lifted my leg to slid the brace underneath it then slid my foot into the shoe before he started to buckle up the brace around my leg. He tightened the straps around my calf and thigh then started on the other leg, being sure not to make it too tight then fastened my laces. He climbed onto the bed, straddling my thighs as he tightened the straps around the inside of my leg, fastening it securely around my waist, not making it too tight before he took a step back to help me to my feet.

"Ouch." I winced as it pinched my sensitive crotch skin.

"Yeah, Priscilla said you might wonna wear more supportive underwear." He teased me, helping me to straighten up.

"Are you sure that's just not what you're hoping for?" I winced again.

"No." He said through a grin as he straightened my t-shirt for me. "If you want em to pinch your crotch every time up stand up then by all means, go ahead." He smugly grinned, holding onto me as a support as I straightened up a little more. "See, not so bad huh?"

"Besides the pinching of vital organs you mean?" I chuckled. "I guess not." I shook my head. "I feel like a robot or something though."

"You'll get used to em." He rested my arms around his neck as he pulled me slightly closer to him. "It's been a while since I've seen you at this level G. You can't walk with em yet though. Priscilla has to get you on the parallel bars with em to strengthen your legs."

"Okay, I'll remember my supportive underwear." I joked making us both laugh. I looked up into his eyes, tightening my arms around his neck. "Are you okay Nicky? You do realise you just came out to your parents in the worst way possible then walked away disowning yourself right?" He nodded back, looking straight into my eyes. "Just checking. So you are okay about it?"

"Yep, to be perfectly honest with you I feel as though this huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Just like when everyone at work found out about us." He slid his hands towards my hips, holding my gaze. "Thanks for standin' up for me in front of my dad, although you didn't have to do it literally. You coulda hurt yourself."

"I didn't. Don't you wonna talk to your parents though? Your mom did look a little pale."

"No," Shaking his head, he brought our lips together. "You're my priority."

"You can't have sex with me while I'm in braces though." I smirked up at him. "Speaking of, I gotta pee."

"You coulda told me sooner." He gently helped me back towards the bed, helping me lie down as he started to unbuckle me again. "There's still that bag of M&M's there G." He noticed.

"Don't open them, I almost got it. When I open it for myself then I know."

Nick lifted my leg out from under the brace, sliding my foot out of the shoe. "Know what G?" He asked curiously.

I looked up into his eyes, softly biting on my lower lip. "That I deserve it... and I'm not being punished."

"Hey Greg, this didn't happen to you because you did somethin' wrong." He straddled my thighs, gently caressing the side of my face with his soft fingertips. "None of this is your fault baby, it coulda happened to anyone."

"Do you still love me?" I insecurely asked. "As much as you did?"

"I love you more than anythin' in the world Greg. Nothin' could or would ever make me love you any less. You're still my everythin'."

"Does my body disgust you? I'm covered in even more scars now. How can you love me?"

"You're body is beautiful, you're beautiful Greg." He delicately joined our lips, gazing lovingly into my eyes. I closed my eyes as he wiped a tear from under my eye with his thumb. "I do love you Greg. You're gorgeous and beautiful. And I love you more than anythin' in the whole wide world. I wonna spend the rest of my life with you, wheelchair or not."

I smiled slightly as I opened my eyes. "You know I still gotta pee." I chuckled.

"Right." He climbed off me to pull the last straps off, pulling my other foot out of the shoe before he helped me off to the bathroom.

We continued with our usual routine for the next few weeks, not hearing a word from Nick's parents, making him only feel worse. _If they did really love him they would have continued to fight to save him._

Priscilla started to teach me how to walk in leg braces. They're actually surprisingly effective, _besides the chafing of vital body parts that is! _But Nick insisted on buying me tighter underwear to wear, _which he loved a little bit too much!_

They were perfect as a substitute for foreplay though. One look at me in tighty whiteys and Nick was all over me.

Anyway... onto more serious matters... Priscilla insisted that I started walking around in my leg braces along with forearm crutches to help me balance, which did make it a lot easier to get around, but then my arms started to ache. Nick no longer worried that I was going to fall over while he was out either and I could open and close each of my fists perfectly.

Things were certainly starting to look up.

But obviously... what goes up must come down in Greg's world.

I collapsed on the sofa after my mom drove me back from physiotherapy, watching some TV while I waited for Nick come home. He was working a triple homicide case with Sara, on a double shift but he soon arrived home with a warm snuggle and luxurious smooch for me.

"Mmmm, I missed you." He smiled, looking down into my eyes as we both licked our lips, pulling back from the kiss. "Did yah miss me?"

"Yes, I always miss you."

"So you're mom called me G." I looked at him curiously, wondering what she called to tell him about. "You walked across the parallel bars without your leg braces on?"

"Oh, yeah," I nodded. "I kept thinking I was going to fall over though and Priscilla told me to do it holding her hands as I walked along... but I was too scared to try."

"Hey, you walked without any support on your legs, that's the important thing." He smiled proudly. "That means your legs are gettin' stronger."

"Does that mean I get my reward now?" I smiled sweetly up at him.

"I did promise yah didn't I?" He smiled, gently running his fingers through my hair. "What would you like for your reward?"

"Sex." I immediately replied, erupting a laugh from Nick's mouth. "We haven't had sex in three whole months Nick." I pouted.

"Three months? What about the other week?"

"That wasn't proper sex." It wasn't, it was a hot and heavy make out session with wandering hands that left us gasping for breath, _it wasn't real penetration sex!_

"Okay then... no we did, remember. I lost my virginity to you Greg." He reminded me.

"Yeah, but I want to feel _you_ inside of _me_ again."

"Done, mind if we take your braces off first though," He pointed to my legs. "I don't fancy havin' sex with a robot."

"Hey." I pouted.

"I know some people have fantasies about havin' sex with robots or aliens, but not me." He teased again. "Relax Bubba, I'm kiddin'." He sweetly chuckled. "Just the other week when you still had them on it was kinda uncomfortable."

"You weren't the one wearing them when you were grinding against me."

"Sorry." He smiled softly. "C'mon." Nick climbed to his feet then lifted me up, making sure my feet were flat on the floor before he started walking. It was the same as walking with the parallel bars, but I was seriously getting the hang of this walking thing again. I couldn't wait to walk without these braces on anymore.

Nick gently pushed me back onto the bed, pulling my sneakers off then slowly started unstrapping the braces. "You know, most people wear sexy lingerie Greg." He smirked as he struggled to unclip all the little straps.

"Shut up Stokes." I laughed.

"Don't get me wrong, what's underneath is sexy, but the robot look just doesn't do it for me."

"Are you trying to turn me off sex with you?" I smirked.

"I'm teasin'." He pressed a moist kiss to my cheek then continued to unstrap the braces from my legs, pulling my sneakers off then started with my clothes as he kissed me passionately.

I closed my eyes feeling the fire reigniting between us.

"Mmmm, now this is my favourite part." He rasped, cupping the bulge of my tighty whiteys in one hand. "When you do get out of these braces, do yah mind keepin' the underwear?"

"No one would ever believe you used to be straight." I laughed.

"You look sexy as hell G."

"Maybe we should go all out and buy the latex body suit?"

"Please don't be jokin'." He gasped at the thought of it. "As long as you're not thinkin' superman style?"

"Definitely not." I giggled; sliding my hands towards his belt, releasing his hard groin from its cage then lifted his t-shirt up over his head so I could feel his naked flesh against my own.

Nick reluctantly slid my underwear off that he loves, grinding his warm flesh against my own. Our warm mouths came together as our naked hard bodies pressed against each other; hands began to explore those familiar places that had been long forgotten over the past three months.

I rolled onto my side as Nick retrieved the supplies he need from the bedside draw, slicking his fingers up to loosen me up as he spooned me from behind. I closed my eyes, moaning softly as his fingers slowly began to scissor in and out of my entrance, while he applied sloppy kisses to my neck.

_I hadn't felt this good in months!_

Then Nick withdrew his fingers, slicking himself up then sliding inside of me ever so gently. I welcomed his full length inside of me then felt Nick rolling onto his back, lifting me on top of him as he did. He raised his knees for my legs to rest on top of then wrapped his arms around me tightly.

"You wanted to try this?" He whispered, applying more kisses to my neck.

"I thought you'd forgotten." I smiled, loving the intense feeling of Nick's hips thrusting against me.

"Nope." He moaned softly as he kissed the skin below my ear, starting to thrust his hips slightly more. "God I miss this." He gasped, wrapping a firm hand around my hard groin, thrusting his hand in time with his own thrusts.

We merged together within seconds, melting against one another as the feeling of pure ecstasy overcame us. I closed my eyes, gasping his name as I started to shudder, releasing my warm seed into his hand. Nick's warm body clutched me tighter as he released his seed inside of me, holding me tightly for a few more minutes while he remained inside of me.

I felt normal against him. There were no straps or metal frames to make my body work properly, it was just us and it was perfect.

Nick slowly pulled out of me, resting me against the bed beside him as he reached across for a Kleenex tissue. He tossed the condom and tissue in the bin then blanketed my body with his, softly sucking on my lower lip.

"How's that for a reward?" He rasped, kissing a trail across my jaw line.

"I'd _love_ to see what I get when I can really walk without the braces." I smiled up at him.

"That you'll just have to wait and see for. I'm proud of you Greg."

"I made a promise to a sexy cowboy." Kissing me softly his warm hand slid down the side of my body to rest at my hip. "Careful there cowboy, you're getting me worked up again."

"My plan exactly." He rasped, trailing kisses down my chest. I arched my chest up towards his mouth as he circled my nipples with his tongue, gently sucking on the nub. "I think the rest of your body deserves a little more attention, don't you?" He smiled up at me.

I closed my eyes as he paid extra attention to my chest, steadily working his heavenly sloppy kisses down towards my slowly arising groin. I moaned his name as his warm mouth completely enveloped my now hard shaft. I gripped my fingers into the bedding around me as I started to lose control of my body, releasing my warm seed into his mouth within a few seconds.

My hands never felt so strong.

Nick eagerly swallowed then returned to my lips to ignite another heavenly kiss so I could taste myself on his breath. "Mmmm, I love you Greg."

"Bout half as much as I love you." Smiling widely, I wrapped my arms around his warm body, pulling him closer against mine. "How am I ever going to repay you Nicky?"

"You don't have to." He whispered, resting his head on my chest. "Seein' you smile is payment enough." Nick pulled the covers up around us, wrapping his arm around me tightly. I pressed a kiss to his forehead then gently began to stroke my fingers through his silky soft hair while he fell asleep in my arms.

Over the next few days we started to get our sex life back on track. I could now stand in the shower, holding the shower rail behind me so we could share some more heavenly moments in there together under the warm spray of the shower.

Priscilla and me started some more muscle strengthening techniques so I wouldn't have to rely on my crutches and leg braces for the rest of my life.

But of course; Greg law, when things start to get good something bad always has to happen to me. And that bad thing goes by the name of Starla!

"Greg, I gotta stay over Starlas tonight, she thinks the baby's definitely comin'." Nick leant across the sofa to kiss me. "That okay?"

"Uh huh." I nodded; still looking at the TV screen as I had TiVo'd some programmes I wanted to catch up on.

"Greg." Nick waved his hand in front of my eyes. "Aren't you gonna moan or pout . . . anythin'?"

"Nope," I shook my head. "If you have to go Nicky then go." I smiled, pushing him back slightly so I could see the TV.

Nick paused the TV so he'd have my full attention. "Call me if you need me. Don't try and do too much for yourself. If she has the baby I'll call your mom to help you out of your braces."

"No," I started to pout now at the thought of needing help from my mother. "Anyone but her!"

"She's your mother Greg. I don't trust anyone else to take great care of you."

"I'll just leave them on." I reasoned with him, going for the remote but he held it out of my reach.

"You said it as uncomfortable to sleep in them. If she has the baby tonight I'll call your mom to come and help you out. She probably won't have it tonight, but just in case." He kissed me again then handed me back the remote. "Make sure you call me if you need me."

"Uh huh."

"Love you." He shouted, heading off to get his shoes on.

"Love you too." I shouted back, trying to focus on my program again.

"Greg!" Nick shouted from the front door. I looked round the corner to watch him blowing a kiss to me. "Call me anyway, please." He pleaded.

I laughed shaking my head at him. "You really can't tolerate women anymore, can yah cowboy?" I smirked.

"No... just Starla. She drives me crazy."

"I thought I drive you crazy?"

"You drive me crazy in a good way Greg." He smiled. "Don't sit in front of the TV all night, you've gotta do your exercises." He warned me.

"Yes mom!" I remarked sarcastically.

Nick laughed as he head off out the door. I turned the volume of the TV up now he was gone, getting back into my program while he had to look after the ex-pregnant-wife.

A few hours later I was startled awake by the sound of a ringing phone. I sleepily rubbed my eyes, reaching for it on the coffee table. "Hello?"

"_Did you forget about me?" _Nick asked.

"No, I fell asleep." I chuckled. "How could I ever forget about you?"

"_That's alright then."_

"Are you drunk?" I asked as I heard him slurring his words.

"_No." _He badly lied.

"You sound it. Has Starla driven you to drink?" I asked concerned. "Do you want me to come over?"

"_You can't drive Greg."_

"I can actually; Priscilla said I can drive now since my leg muscles are slightly stronger. I don't wonna leave you with her; you'll become an emotional wreck."

"_No G, I'm fine." _But he clearly wasn't. I struggled to sit up, swinging my legs over the side of the couch.

"I'm coming to get yah Nicky, hang tight. I'll be there as soon as I can." I snapped my phone shut setting it down on the table so he didn't have time to argue, retrieving the car keys off the coffee table. My mother's car that is. She bought a brand new one and I got the old one. Since she moved to Vegas she thought her car choice could use some more class, so I got the old trashy one.

I took the elevator down to the parking lot, walking on my leg braces and crutches, just in case I fell over. I still didn't trust my muscles to walk by themselves yet.

I soon found the old and busted Daewoo, loading my crutches into the back as I strapped myself into the driver's seat. The car failed to start the first time. I rested my head against the steering wheel, pleading it start as I turned the key again.

"Yes!" I rejoiced as the engine started to hum.

I sped off out the garage, heading off towards Starlas house to retrieve the emotional drunk boyfriend of mine. It didn't take me too long to zip through the traffic lights, arriving at her house. If it wasn't for Nick's truck parked out the front I would have never found it as all the houses on this street look exactly the same.

I quickly climbed out the car, pulling my crutches out the back then made my way off up the path, knocking on the door. A few seconds later I heard the heavy footsteps of a very angry pregnant lady... _if you can call her a lady?_

"What do you want?" She hissed at me as she pulled the door open.

"I'm here to take Nick home." She rolled her eyes then took a step back so I could stagger past her.

"What happened to you?" She asked as she pushed the front door shut.

"It's a long story." I mumbled, looking around for Nick.

"Nick!" Starla shouted up the stairs in a shrill voice that could make a dog go deaf.

Nick soon emerged from the staircase, looking at me surprised. "Greg, I told you not to drive out here."

"Well I'm here now. C'mon."

"No, no! You can't go! What if it happens as soon as you step out the door?" Starla shrieked at him.

"I think it has more sense than that." Nick muttered. "If it's been listenin' to every word you've said for the past few hours, I'm sure it would do well to stay in there." He drunkenly laughed as he staggered off towards the kitchen.

"Nick! You can't leave me. My sisters out of town and your parents are back in Texas. Who's gonna take me to the hospital?" Starla yelled, following him into the kitchen, while I awkwardly stood around in the front room.

As they continued shouting at each other I heard the clatter of glass. I limped off towards the kitchen door, watching my boyfriend chugging back a bottle of whiskey. I rolled my eyes in disappointment, but listening to Starla shriek and squeal made me want to drink too.

"Nick, this is no point!" I shouted, trying to get him to stop as I wasn't exactly in any shape to carry his drunken arse out of here. "Nick, Starlas not worth this!"

"Hey, you little shit!" Starla shrieked at me.

"He's not a little shit! You are. Except your big!" Nick drunkenly belly laughed again, placing the nearly empty whiskey bottle down on the side. _Even his insults are bad when he's drunk!_

"Nicky, C'mon . . . let's go." I insisted.

"No, you can't leave me!" Starla protested. "Who's supposed to take me to the hospital?"

"I'm not exactly in any shape to take you now." Nick laughed, stumbling into the dining table. He pushed aside the chair in his path, hobbling off towards me.

"God! You really are a worthless piece of shit, Nicholas Stokes. I don't know why I ever married you!" Starla shouted angrily.

"I don't know why I married you either!" Nick shouted back, leaning against the doorframe as his mind started to spin. "I'd rather marry a freakin' hippo than you. In fact, you're worse than a freakin' hippo."

_Bad insult yet again. _I rolled my eyes. _Not to mention the fact he's insulting a pregnant woman, _even if she is Starla.

"Get out you fucking pig! Just get out, and take the stupid cripple with you."

"Hey, I'm not stupid!" I protested. _My IQ's probably triple what yours is!_

"C'mon G." Nick rested his arm around my shoulder, struggling to walk off towards the front door.

"You can forget about having any part of this baby's life Nicholas Stokes. I wouldn't want my child to be raised by a worthless lummox like you!"

"You already signed the paper work." He reminded her. "I get the kid every other weekend and some holidays. You can't change the joint custody now!"

"Yes I can. I'll take you to court!" She shrieked in a high pitched tone once again. I don't know how he put up with her for five years. _She's a nightmare!_

"You do that!" Nick shouted.

"Nick, maybe you wonna stop talking now?" I suggested, struggling to take his weight and mine.

"Shut up Greg, you have no part in this!" Starla shouted, blocking our exit to the front door.

"He does actually." Nick groggily answered.

"Nick, shut up." I warned him.

"What's he talking about?" Starla demanded, folding her arms across her large pregnant stomach.

"Nothing, he's drunk. He's delirious." I smiled innocently, trying to get Nick out the door before he said something he couldn't take back.

"Delirious?" Nick questioned as we made it down the path towards my car. "I'm not..."

"Shh." I hushed him.

"You forgot his stuff!" Starla shrieked from the doorway. I left Nick leant against the side of the car as I hopped back up the garden path to grab Nick's bag off the sofa. "What's he talking about?" Starla demanded, corning me in her front room. "What have you got to do with our baby?"

"Nothing." I shook my head.

"You didn't tell him about Warrick did you?" I shook my head again, looking up at the door wide eyed as Nick stumbled back through it.

"Would you leave Greg alone!" Nick shouted at her, leaning back against the wall behind him. "I am so sick of your whinny voice!"

"Nick lets go." I pulled his arm over my shoulder trying to get him out the door, but he was a lot stronger than me.

"I'm so glad I'm not married to you anymore!" Starla shrilly yelled as tears pooled from her eyes. "You'll be a worthless father!"

"No... no I wouldn't." He shook his head. "I... would be a great father. It's you that would make our kid deaf before they reach their first birthday."

"You're never going to see your child at this rate. You fucking REDNECK!"

"I was an idiot for ever marryin' you!" Nick shouted at her.

"You really are an idiot, you got that right. HILLBILLY!" She angrily shouted.

"Okay, let's go." I tried again.

"No wait, calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people." Nick pulled against me as Starla said that, turning to face her with an angry expression on his face. "You're a PIG Nick! I hate you so much!" She started to blubber.

"I HATE you too!"

"Children." I cautioned them. I hate being stuck in the middle of these two. "C'mon Nick, let's go!"

"That's it, walk away you SISSY!" Starla shouted after us.

Nick pulled against me again, turning back to face her in the middle of the room. "I am so sick of you Starla! I would love it if I never heard your whinny little voice ever again..."

"Nick, let's go." I tugged on his arm, trying to pull him away, before he really said something he regretted.

"Oh and by the way, I'm GAY and I've been SCREWIN' Greg since February." Nick drunkenly shouted at her then passed out, hitting the floor as he passed out cold.

I looked up at Starla nervously, feeling her eyes burning through me as she continued to stare.

_Nick is seriously going to regret that when he's sober._

* * *

**Please Review if you liked it.**


	42. Chapter 42

**WARNING FOR STRONG LANGUAGE!**

**Chapter Forty Two:**

"What?" Starla shrieked at me. _Uh oh! _"He's Gay?" I bit my lip looking at Nick's lifeless body on the floor beside me. _He would have to pass out now! Of all the times!_

Too afraid to move I just stayed perfectly still, not saying a word. _What could I say? _Nick just exposed us in the worst way possible.

"Have you been sleeping with my husband?" She shouted at me, pointing an accusing finger at me.

"He's not your husband..."

"Doesn't matter!" She shrieked interrupting me.

_Ouch! Seriously woman put a lid on it!_

"That's disgusting. How long have you been together? He's always been staying late at work and things over the years, I've suspected him of cheating before . . . but with you." She held her mouth in repulsion as she almost threw up.

_Believe me I felt the same way after I found out you slept with Warrick a month after you married Nick!_

"We've only been together since this February." I corrected then attempted to help Nick to his feet. But he was out cold and I wasn't at full strength.

"My mother told me he was bad news when I married him." _Oh god! She's not gonna cry is she? I can't stand it when women cry, especially over Nick._

"You're one to talk." I muttered, managing to balance Nick's limp body against me as I leant on my crutches.

"What's that supposed to mean you little dweeb?" She spat at me angrily. _Little dweeb! God if she wasn't pregnant I'd have some words for her._

"Warrick for example?" I asked her.

"So Nick did this to get revenge on me?" She shrieked, holding her sides.

"No, he doesn't even know you slept with Warrick."

"Why didn't you tell him?" She asked.

"I didn't want to split up Warrick and Nick's friendship." I explained to her, beginning to feel as though I was going to topple over with Nick's weight leaning against me.

"So instead you decide to split up my marriage?"

"Your marriage was already split!" I corrected then saw her holding her sides in agony again. _Oh No! Not now. Please not now! _"Starla . . . are you okay?"

"No, what do you care! Get out and take your... GIGOLO with you!" She shouted, just as her waters broke all over the kitchen floor.

_Oh Shit! Nick would have to do this to me now of all times right?_

"Starla, we gotta get you to the hospital."

"No, just go... go away." She started panting heavily, clutching her sides even more.

I just about managed to drag Nick a few more feet, sending his body crashing down to the sofa. I struggled back towards Starla on my crutches to help her; the last thing I wanted to do, but I couldn't leave her right now.

"No! I don't want your help." She squealed at me.

"Starla your freaking waters just broke, you're having contractions and your ex-husband is completely dead to the world. Just let me help you, c'mon I'll drive you to the hospital."

"No, no . . . how can you drive?" She pointed to me crutches. "I don't trust you to get me there safely."

"My legs aren't broken. The muscles are just weakened. It was all part of a brain injury and the being set on fire stuff. They said the nerves and muscles were all damaged. My hands are better now, but my legs are still a little weak. It's like walking on dead legs without my crutches. The doctors explained it to me, but I really didn't underst..."

"Greg!" She shouted interrupting me. "Would you please shut up?"

"Ha, so you do have manners?" I smirked with a wide smile on my face.

"Shut up! I'm having a freaking baby here and I'm stuck with the biggest loser ever!"

"Would you stop with the name calling? Otherwise I'm just gonna leave you here." I threatened, seeing the look of shock in her eyes.

"Okay, but I'm driving."

"You can't fit behind the wheel." I pointed out to her.

"I'm not fat you fre..."

"Call me another name and I'll walk out the door and leave you here!" I threatened.

"You wouldn't dare!"

"Try me." I smiled at her. She growled angrily at me, clutching her sides. "C'mon, I can drive you."

"How the heck did you drive over here like that anyway?"

"Like a grandma, very slowly, but I did it. C'mon, I'll get you to the hospital safely."

"Okay, grab my phone." She pointed over to the side. "I wonna call my sister, so she knows who to sue if I don't make it." I grabbed her phone, handing it over to her. "Oh God this really hurts... and I seriously fucking hate you Greg." She moaned at me.

"You're supposed to hate the man who did it you." I smirked, but she wasn't in the mood for laughing.

"Oh Shit! She's not answering!" Starla shouted angrily into the phone. "Oh Shit! The batteries dead!" She shouted again, throwing the phone across the table. "Shit. Shit. Shit." She shouted even more as the phone clattered to the ground, breaking to pieces.

"Do you really want your baby's first words to be Shit?" I asked her. Starla glared at me angrily, holding the counter beside her as she screamed from another contraction. "C'mon, let's get to the hospital." I insisted.

"Are you sure you can drive?"

"I got here okay didn't I? I'm not a cripple!" I warned her.

"Fine, we'll take your car." She hobbled off towards the door. "Wait, what about Nick?"

"Um..." I looked between her and Nick, wondering how I was going to get Nick into the car. "I guess I'll have to carry him."

"Are you sure?" She asked. "Here, I'll help."

"Oh now you wonna help?" I remarked, hobbling over to the couch.

"I need the father of my baby there and you're completely useless." She mumbled, trying to lift Nick off the couch with me. "I can't believe after all these months of preparation I get stuck with a cripple and a lazy drunk!" She shouted as we both struggled to lift Nick. "Ouch!"

"What?" I shrieked, hoping the baby wasn't coming yet.

"He stood on my foot. Would you relax?" She hissed at me as we struggled with Nick between us. Starla suddenly let go of him, taking a step back, holding her stomach. "Ouch, I can't do this. I shouldn't be lifting in my state! Give me your car keys, I'll get the door open, you push him in."

I handed over my keys, watching her hobbling off down the garden path towards my car. "Nicky C'mon, don't do this to me!" I shook him but there was no response.

_I_ _don't do so good under pressure!_

"Okay! Doors open. I'm coming back." She announced, hobbling back towards me. "C'mon cripple."

"Don't call me that." I sternly warned her.

"Fine. C'mon Nick! Up! Get Up! Wake Up Now!" She shouted at him, but there was no response. "Stupid drunk." She muttered then looked up at me. "I'm sorry; I didn't mean to call you a cripple. Okay? Can we just go?"

_She certainly changes her tune quickly!_

"Now c'mon, let's get him into the car." She insisted pulling Nick's arm over her shoulder, struggling to help me with him towards the car. "C'mon Greg, you're not even taking any of his weight."

"I'm struggling with my own as it is."

_Bitch!_

"A drunk, a cripple and a pregnant woman... that's like a setup to a bad joke." She suddenly started to laugh in hysterics as we approached the car.

_I didn't know pregnant women had mood swings this late in their pregnancy!_

Starla held the back door open while we struggled to load Nick into the seat. He was completely out... and snoring... and dribbling. "Ew. C'mon Nick! Wake Up!" I shook him.

_Not that he could drive right now! _But he's a lot more stable than me... _and it's his bloody baby!_

"Greg! Hurry Up!" Starla screamed from another contraction.

"Going as fast as I can!" I shouted, struggling to clip the belt together. "Got it." I sighed in relief, pushing the back door shut then helped Starla with her door. She grabbed my arm as she winced in agony from her contraction. "Ouch! That hurts!" I yelled like a total sissy.

"I know!" She remarked. "I'm having the baby here!"

"How unfortunate, can you not squeeze my arm so hard!" I managed to get out of her death grip, rubbing the sore spot of my arm. "Ouch!"

"Don't be such a baby." She moaned, climbing into the passenger seat, barely able to fit up against the glove compartment. "Greg! The Door!" Starla shouted, pointing to her house.

"Right, I was just getting to that." I closed the car door on her, before I attempted to hobble back towards her house and close the front door.

I returned to the car a few seconds later, completely exhausted already. I struggled into the driver's seat myself, stuffing my crutches into the back.

"Drive! What are you doing?" Starla shouted as the engine didn't even make a sound as I turned the keys.

"I'm trying." I shouted back, turning the key again but the engine didn't do anything again. "Oh Crap!"

"You gotta be kidding me! You can't start your car?" She hissed at me in anger.

"No, the battery's dead."

"The battery's dead?" She looked at me shocked. "What do you mean the battery's dead Greg?"

"It's dead!" I shouted back at her.

"How can the battery be dead?"

"Because... I meant to charge it."

"Why the fuck didn't you charge it then you little dweeb?"

"Because Nick called me to come and get him and he sounded desperate and upset so I got here as soon as I could, completely forgetting about the state of this crappy old car and I guess I haven't really been paying much attention to my car, what with the physiotherapy and everything!"

"Don't shout at me! It's not my fault!"

"Technically it is! You upset him! You made him drink! And... You got yourself fucking pregnant." I shouted, feeling guilty for shouting at her as she was pregnant. "Let's take your car."

"You're not driving my car!" She stubbornly shouted.

"Fine, I'll give you a fucking piggy back all the way there then!" I remarked sarcastically, leaning into the back seat to search Nick's pockets for his car keys. "Fuck! Crap!" I shouted angrily.

"Oh, his keys are in the house." She pointed then suddenly went pale.

"What?" I asked just as shocked as she was, hoping the baby's head was coming out or something.

She searched her pockets then looked up at me shocked. "I don't have a key. You shut the door without grabbing my keys!"

"Stop yelling at me! I'm not too good under pressure." I calmly stated, taking a few calming deep breaths as I felt my hands starting to shake. "We just need to relax, okay?"

"I'm having the fucking baby here Greg!" She shouted as I took in a few deep breaths. "How the hell am I supposed to relax when I'm stuck with you?"

"Language for starters. Your baby's gonna come out of there cursing the world over." I pointed out to her, trying to think. We were beginning to sound like a squabbling married couple ourselves. "Do you keep a spare key anywhere?"

She nodded, gulping hard. "On Nick's keys."

"And Nick's keys are?" I asked, hoping for a break sometime soon.

"In the guest bedroom."

"Okay . . . that'd be upstairs right?" I asked. Starla nervously nodded. "Do you have a back door?"

"Yeah . . . but it's locked."

"And you don't keep a key in a flower pot or anything?" I asked, expecting the answer to be no and it was. "Okay, no need to panic." I looked up at the house seeing there was a window open upstairs. "Look there's a window open."

"How the hell are you going to get up there moron! I don't know if you noticed, but you're not exactly fit for scaling the side of a building."

"Won't know till I try." I laughed slightly.

_There was no way in hell I was about to scale the outside of her house!_

"Don't you have a phone or something?" She asked, trying to remain as calm as possible as she looked around the car.

"Oh Shit! I left it at home!" I cursed myself. "Where's Nick's phone?" I reached through the seats to search Nick's pockets, but it wasn't in any of them and he wasn't wearing his jacket that he usually keeps it in. "Double shit! Why does this always happen to me?"

"Quit moaning! I'm having a baby here Greg, how the hell are we supposed to get to the hospital?" She asked, looking at me as if I had all the answers.

"A neighbour? You seriously don't keep a key with a neighbour?"

"No Greg!" She shouted very loudly as another contraction hit her.

"Okay, I have an idea." I struggled to get out of the car again, reaching for crutches in the back. "Do you mind if I break one of your windows?"

"Yes!" She shouted in protest.

"Do you want me to get you to the hospital or not Starla?"

"Fine! But you're paying for it buddy!" She angrily warned me.

"Nick's gonna pay for this later." I muttered to myself, limping round the house towards the back door. I managed to stabilise myself on one crutch, while I raised the other to force through the glass of the window, shattering away all the tiny pieces away before I attempted to reach my arm through.

Luckily the lock wasn't too far down the door, so I could just about reach it. Pulling it too was the hard part. I gripped my fingers as tightly as I could around the bolt, using all my might to pull it open.

_Stupid thing! _I cursed it. _What is this thing welded shut?_

I tensed the muscles in my arm and hand, struggling to pull it open with all the power I could muster. _Unfortunately it just wasn't enough though. _No matter how hard I tried.

"God! What are you doing?" Starla appeared behind me. "You're taking forever."

"I can't pull the lock open." I removed my arm from the window, taking a slight step back. Starla reached straight through and pulled the lock open with no problem, making me feel even more useless.

"His keys should be upstairs in the guestroom." She told me, leaning against the wall as she held her stomach. "Hurry Greg!"

I nodded, limping off into the house, rounding the corner towards the stairs. _I haven't climbed stairs since I got out of hospital! _I suddenly realised as I looked up at the never ending stair case before me, trying to persuade myself to go up, but I was too scared that I'd fall.

"C'mon Greg!" Starla shouted in frustration.

"I am." _C'mon Greg. You can do this. You can so totally do this; it's just like the parallel bars... only it's vertical! But you can still do it. _I tried to persuade myself, hesitantly reaching out my left leg to the first step, feeling a tingle down my spine.

_I can do this. I can do this. I can do this. _I started to repeat over and over again. _Even though my legs are out of commission for a while, I can so totally do this!_ I gulped nervously as I looked up the stairs.

_There's no way I can do this! I shoulda stayed at home on the sofa!_

"Greg, if you're gonna do it, hurry the fuck up!"

"Language!" I shouted back to her then reached out for banister on the right hand side, gripping it tightly as I took another step up with my other leg.

"Greg hurry up, they're getting closer together!" She shouted.

"Stop yelling, I'm trying to concentrate!" I yelled back, taking a deep breath as I pulled myself up onto the next step, feeling my legs weakening beneath me already.

"Greg!" Starla shouted, almost causing me to slip. I closed my eyes gripping the banister beside me tightly as if it was a lifeline.

_Oh my god! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die!_

"Why are you stopping? Hurry Up!" I looked round slightly to see she was at the foot of the staircase. "Even I can climb stairs quicker than that!"

"You do it then!" I shouted back in anger, holding onto the banister for dear life as struggled to raise my foot onto the next step.

"Greg!"

_Shut up! _I inhaled a deep breath, taking the last few steps up, refusing to let go of the banister just yet. _Why of all days did Nick choose today to get completely drunk and pass out?_

_His stupid hero complex must be rubbing off on me._

_Why didn't I just bring my phone with me and call an ambulance? I could have even asked the neighbours to call an ambulance for us! _I rolled my eyes angrily at myself. I think of this now when I'm stuck on the second floor of her house.

_I told you I'm not good under pressure. All logic goes out the window!_

"Greg! C'mon!"

"Be quiet." I mumbled to myself, finally reaching the top of the stairs.

I searched all the upstairs rooms, finally finding the guest bedroom down the end of the hall. I almost toppled over as I stepped inside, feeling my legs giving out slightly, but I managed to grab a chair nearby to stabilise myself.

_I'm Alive! I'm Alive. _I gasped a deep breath.

_Ah! Keys. Yes, we're saved! _I rejoiced as I noticed them sat on the desk right in front of me.

I grabbed them in my good hand, struggling to turn around to head back towards the staircase. _There was no way I could do this! _I gasped in shock as I looked down the stairs. _They seem a lot longer going down then they did up._

"Greg C'mon!" Starla shouted up the stairs.

"That's not very encouraging!" I reached out for the banister again, struggling to step down as my crutch got in the way. "Ouch!" I winced as the other crutch swung loose in the air, hitting the back of my leg.

"C'mon Greg, you can do this." She changed her tone to a positive one. "Just don't fall on me!"

"I won't." I struggled to move my other foot, feeling my lower legs starting to ache under the pressure.

"C'mon Greg. You're doing fine. Just... twelve more steps to go." She quickly counted, but she counted wrong. _There was actually only ten! _But who was I to argue with her at a time like this.

I took heavy deep breaths between each step, trying to balance my weight out as if I was walking normally like Priscilla taught me.

"That's it. C'mon Greg. You're doing great." She continued her words of encouragement. _Weird. _I thought to myself as I took the last three steps down. "Well done!" She smiled widely. "Now can we please get to the hospital before I have this freaking baby right here?" She changed back to angry in a split second.

"Have you ever considered acting?" I asked her, immediately getting a slap upside the head. "Ouch!"

"You deserved that, now c'mon! Baby's coming!"

I let her lead the way, watching her waddling along as she winced from her contractions. I followed along behind her, almost slipping on her waters as I walked through the kitchen.

_Oh god that's a relief. _I sighed heavily; having all her waters on me would be gross and very humiliating.

"Oh God Greg! Hurry Up!" Starla shouted, from the doorway.

"Coming," I cautiously stepped over her waters, limping off out the door after her, towards Nick's truck. "How far apart are your contractions?" I asked unlocking the truck.

"I don't know. I wasn't fucking counting!" She shouted angrily at me. "Don't forget Nick." She pointed back to my car. "Greg C'mere. I can't get in by myself!" She shouted. I stumbled round to the passenger side of the truck, wincing as she squeezed my shoulder tightly to climb inside. "Oh God, this fucking hurts!" She screamed.

"I know." I winced in agony from my shoulder.

"Shut up you little dweeb!"

"Okay, can we stop with the name calling? I'm trying to help you here."

"You slept with my husband!"

"Yes I did . . . but you were separated when I did." I corrected her with a wide smile. She gave me an angry glare then watched as I limped off towards my car to pull Nick out the back, realising all the neighbours were now watching us.

_Oh Crap!_

"C'mon Nicky, please." I moaned, pulling his seatbelt off. My legs felt as though they were going to give out at any second and his weight wasn't helping me out any. I had no idea how I was going to get him into the truck. I could barely step up to that thing when I wasn't a cripple.

_Great, now I'm saying it!_

"Nick. C'mon! Wake up!" I shook him, but there was still no response.

"Greg, what's taking so long?" Starla shouted from the truck.

"There's no way I can lift him from my car to get him into his car Scarla!"

"Star-la! RETARD!" She shouted angrily, struggling to climb back out of the truck to help me. She hobbled over to me with an angry look on her face, helping me to pull Nick from the car, balancing his weight between us. "Trust Nick to fucking do this when I'm having the damn baby! And trust him to have a boyfriend who can't even walk properly!" She moaned as we struggled over to the truck.

"Insulting me isn't going to help us out any Star-la." I held onto Nick while she pulled open the back door. "How the hell are we supposed to do this?"

"God, you really are a loser." Starla moaned, pulling Nick's arm over her shoulder.

"Yes that's it. It can't be the fact that I can't walk without leg braces!" I glared at her angrily then attempted to lift Nick up with her.

"Greg, you have to lift some of his weight!"

"I swear to god Starla if you yell at me one more time to hurry up or to pull my weight I will seriously leave on the side of the road to deliver the fucking baby yourself!" I snapped at her, immediately feeling guilty afterwards. "So sorry. I'm just really stressed."

"Apology accepted." She mumbled, lifting the heavy Texan into the back of the truck, with very little help from me.

_She's surprisingly strong for a girl._

I helped her slightly by lifting his legs in. _Don't even know how we'll get his seatbelt on though. _Starla wobbled back towards the passenger door, struggling to pull herself in. I pushed Nick's door shut then gave her a boost, pushing her door shut too.

_Two down... one to go._

I limped round to the driver's side of the car, pulling open the door towards me. I looked at the step in front of me then the handle on the door, trying to judge the best way for me to lift myself into the car. Usually Nick would lift me in, but he was completely dead to the world right now.

"Greg, what are you waiting for?" Starla moaned.

"Please, be quiet." I calmly said to her, pulling off my crutches and sliding them into the car. I gripped one hand tightly around the handle in the door and the other on the seatbelt. I stepped one leg up onto the step in front of me, pulling against the seatbelt to pull myself in.

_Oh C'mon! Are you a man or a mouse? _I asked myself, using more strength to pull myself up.

_Yes! I made it._

Now laying face first flat on the chair with my legs dangling out the side of the car I hoped none of their neighbours had a video camera to film this as I imagined I looked pretty stupid right now. _As opposed to normal? _I asked myself.

"What are you doing?" Starla snapped.

"Playing soccer." I mumbled sarcastically, trying to lift myself to sit in the chair instead of laying on it. Starla watched me wide eyed as I did, but I finally managed to get my legs in the car, pulling the door shut. "There. That's the hard part over." I smiled, getting slapped upside the head again. "Hey, whaddya do that for?"

"For being a jerk! I'm pregnant, what's your excuse for yelling at me?"

"I'm not very good under pressure. I crack." I sighed heavily, feeling even more exhausted.

"Drive then!"

"I have to strap Nick in." I turned to look at him then shook my head, sighing heavily. "He'll be fine." He was laying flat on his chest across the back seat. There was no way I would be able to straighten him up and get a belt round him.

"Good, coz I think the baby's coming!"

"No," I started the truck, relieved it started then drove off down the road heading straight for the hospital. "Just hold it please; we'll be there in no time."

"Drive faster Greg!"

"I can't. I shouldn't be driving as it is. We could have an accident, but we have no way of calling for an ambulance and out of the three of us I think I'm the more suitable one to drive."

"Shut up and drive!" She shouted angrily. I nodded, but didn't gain any speed, fearful that Nick might roll off the chair and hit his head or something.

"You've really only been sleeping with Nick since February?" She randomly asked halfway down the road.

"Yeah." I awkwardly nodded.

"So who was he sleeping with while he was with me?" I looked at her wide eyed, trying to think of a way to break it to her that Nick almost slept with a different woman every night. "Was it more than one woman? Or was it other men?"

"Only women... but definitely more than one." I told her as lightly as I could, even though it would give me great pleasure in hurting her feelings.

"How do you know he never slept with men?"

"Because I was his first." I said looking in the rear view mirror at Nick still fast asleep and he hadn't rolled yet.

"Doesn't this kinda remind you of that movie 'Father of the Bride'? You know the second one where George takes those sleeping pills?" Starla chuckled.

"Yeah," I laughed, looking at Nick fast asleep. "Only a lot less funny." Starla nodded in agreement then held her sides in agony as another contraction hit. "Did you time that one?"

"Six minutes. Turn here." She pointed. "Greg here."

"I am! I'm not gonna turn into oncoming traffic!" I shouted at her.

"Greg stop shoutin'." Nick mumbled, getting into a comfier position against his seat.

Starla shook her head laughing. "At least Nick and I agree on something." She smirked.

I rolled my eyes at her then slammed the breaks on as I almost hit a biker that stopped dead in the middle of the road. Nick went rolling off the seat, but Starla reached her hands back to stop him from hitting his head.

"What did you do?" Starla shrieked at me.

I looked out the front window of the truck as the biker angrily climbed off his bike, pulling his helmet off. "Oh Shit." I mumbled.

"You fucking stalled the car Greg!" Starla shouted at me.

"Thank you captain obvious." I struggled to restart it as the angry biker walked round to the driver's side door.

"How'd I end up getting stuck with you when I'm about to give fucking birth!"

"I've been asking myself that same question." I mumbled, trying to start the car again.

"Let me talk to him, wind down your window." She instructed. I wound down the window slightly, hoping the big biker wasn't going to hit me.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing you fucking little shit!" He immediately shouted, clenching his fists at his sides.

"Please excuse my husband's boyfriend's driving, he's completely incompetent!"

"This is your way of handling it?" I shouted at her. "And he's your ex-husband. You're divorced now! Remember?"

"No thanks to you!" She hissed.

"The whole divorce thing was your own doing. You were separated before I came into his life." I corrected her.

"That's disgusting!" She cringed.

"I didn't mean it like that!" I rolled my eyes at her. "I meant..."

"Hey!" The biker shouted as we were arguing amongst ourselves, completely forgetting he was there.

"What the fuck do you want?" Starla shouted at him. "I'm having a baby here!"

"So, let me get this straight. Who's your husband?" Starla pointed to Nick laying on the floor of the back seat. "What's up with him?"

"He's drunk." Starla scoffed.

"So your husband's boyfriend is driving you to the hospital? That's fucked up!"

"Tell me about it." Starla moaned, holding her sides as another contraction hit. "The most fucked up part is my husband is sleeping with a cripple!"

"EX-husband." I shouted. "They've been divorced for months."

"Right!" He nodded terribly confused. "So who's this cripple he's sleeping with?"

"What do you care!" Starla shouted at him. "Go and mind your own business, REDNECK!"

"Let's not shout at the very nice large man, with very large upper arms." I whispered to her.

"You scratched my bike jerk wad." The angry biker shouted at me.

"I didn't even touch your bike, I stopped before I reached it and why are you stopping in the middle of the road where people are driving?" I shouted at him.

"Get out of the car!" He angrily shouted at me, clenching his very large fists at his sides, ready to break my bones.

"No way. You're not a cop, you can't make us!" Starla shouted back like an immature child. "My husband's a cop you know!"

"EX-husband, and he's a CSI." I corrected.

"Greg! Shut the fuck up!" She started screaming again as another contraction hit. "Just drive."

"How am I supposed to..."

"Drive Greg, the baby's fucking coming."

"Get out of the car!" The biker shouted, going for the door handle, making my breathing and heart rate steadily increase. _Oh No! Not now!_

"Greg, Drive!"

I looked at Starla then put my foot down, knocking his bike out of the way as I sped off down the road. I looked over my shoulder at the even angrier biker, hearing Starla laughing.

"Stop laughing! It's not funny!" I snapped at her, trying to maintain a steady breathing pace.

"It is! Nick ditched me to be with you... you can't even stand up for yourself in front of a biker about to break you in two."

"So?"

"So, why would Nick choose you over me?"

"He said he loves me."

"He said he loves you? And you didn't have to force him or anything?" She asked shocked. I nodded slightly watching her reaction. "God I fucking hate men. I've been with Nick five years and he never once said he loves me by himself. He shags you for the first time and he's gone all sappy."

"Maybe you two weren't meant to be?"

"Why are you breathing so heavily?" She suddenly asked. I didn't realise I was breathing that heavily.

"I'm prone to panic attacks okay, just relax. I can still get us to the hospital." I gripped my hands tighter around the steering wheel to stop them from shaking.

"Panic attacks? You're not having one now are you?" She looked at me uneasily. "Turn here." She pointed. "Just take slow deep breaths." She opened her window to allow more air into the car. "You don't throw up when you have them do you?"

"Not all the time." I shook my head.

"Second right."

"I know the way to the hospital!" I shouted at her.

"So-rry." She mumbled sarcastically. "Ouch! Fucking hell." She winced from her contraction. "Okay that one was four minutes. I think the baby's coming."

"We're almost there." I assured her.

"Just keep breathing Greg, I don't wonna be in a car accident too." She muttered. "Why didn't Nick tell me sooner?"

"About us?" She nodded. "He thought you wouldn't let him see his child." I explained. "If it's even his."

"It is!" She protested. "Greg deep breaths, you're wheezing."

I didn't want to shout 'I am' so I just kept quiet. _I was wheezing because of the deep breaths._

"I can't believe Nick chose you over me. I have lots of good qualities. And his family loved me!" She moaned just as I pulled into the hospital. "This is so fucking unfair."

"Why did you sleep with Warrick after you married Nick then?" I asked curiously, pulling up towards the front of the hospital.

"Do we have to talk about this now?"

"I just don't understand, if you loved him so much why did you sleep with his best friend a month or so after your marriage?" I asked curiously, holding my sides as they started to ache.

Starla looked back at Nick, nervously chomping on her lower lip. "It was an accident . . . now come on . . . let's go, unless you wonna deliver this baby yourself!" I shook my head then quickly jumped out of the car, stumbling slightly as I hit the pavement. I stuck my fingers in my mouth to whistle some doctors over to help Starla from the car.

A nurse came rushing out with a wheelchair in her hands. "No thanks, he'll need it though." Starla indicated to Nick passed out in the back of the truck. "Are you coming in Greg?" She asked me. "I hate hospitals. I don't wonna go in alone." I nervously looked up at the hospital, feeling my heartbeat pounding faster.

"Okay," I gulped. "Okay, I'll come in with you."

"What's wrong with him?" A doctor beside me asked, indicating to Nick.

"He was drunk. I couldn't strap him in." I indicated to the leg braces around my legs.

"Do you need a wheelchair sir?" The doctor asked, signalling some guys over to help him get Nick out.

"God I'd love one." I smiled as I was completely exhausted still. The doctors lifted Nick out of the truck into the wheelchair, wheeling him off into the hospital after Starla. I hobbled along behind, feeling my arms shaking even more as I walked into the hospital, but I had to face my fear for Starlas sake.

_That's weird. Since when do I do things for Starla?_

"Greg, C'mon!" Starla pleaded. I rushed as quickly as I could to join her in the hospital room while the doctors got her set up.

"Is he the father?" A doctor asked her.

"No!" Starla and I both shouted together.

"He can't be in here then." The doctor informed Starla.

"Yes he can, don't you dare leave me Greg!" She shouted at me, reaching out for my hand to hold. "You can't leave me."

"Okay," I gulped, watching as nurse stuck something into the vein in Starlas arm.

"You're not squeamish are you sir?" The nurse asked me.

"No, he's having panic attacks." Starla told her, clutching my hand tightly. "You are still breathing right Greg?"

"I'm breathing." I nodded. "You should be more worried about yourself."

"Yeah well, for now you're the substitute father as the other ones passed out. So I need you here." She insisted.

"Okay Starla, you're not ready to give birth just yet." The doctor informed her. "You've got a little bit more time, but you're well on your way." I sighed in relief, nervously looking around at the machines that were measuring her blood pressure, temperature and things. The steady beat of the heartbeat started to remind me of when I was in here, making me shake a little more.

"Is that one the baby's?" Starla asked, pointing to one of the monitors.

"Yes, that's your baby's heartbeat." The doctor smiled. "I'll be back to check on you in a bit Starla." She nodded as the nurses set up her epidural, still holding my hand tightly.

"Thanks for being here Greg." She smiled at me.

_Like I had a choice? _"You're welcome."

"You're not dizzy or anything are you? Please don't throw up in here." She cautioned me.

"I'm not gonna throw up." I smiled at her. "I'm fine. I wish Nick was here."

"You and me both," She looked up at my expression. "I just mean because he's the father and he's meant to be here."

"Are you alright sir?" The nurse asked me.

I nodded; wishing people would stop asking me that. _She's the one having the baby here. Not me!_

"Doctor!" The nurse suddenly shouted as the monitors and things started bleeping on alert. "Doctor!"

The Doctor rushed back in with another nurse, snapping some gloves in place on his hands. "Okay Starla, this is it. The baby's coming."

"Greg, don't go!" Starla pleaded, clutching my hand tightly.

_Oh my god! I'm so gonna throw up now!_

* * *

**Please Review**

**AN: If you didn't get the reference to 'Father of the Bride' that Starla said. It's the second one where his daughter Annie and his wife are both having a baby. George takes some sleeping pills right before his daughter starts going into labour and he's completely dead to the world. It's really funny and That's what inspired me to make Nick completely drunk and pass out right before it happens. :D**

**I hope you enjoyed this one.**

***Been reading lots about pregnancy and the delivery process for the next chapter.***

**Also if you're reading 'Without You' my beta is having trouble with her computer, so she won't be able to read my chapters for a while. But I really want her to read them first so as soon as she gets her computer fixed I'll start posting chapters for it again. Sorry to keep you waiting.**

**~Holly**


	43. Chapter 43

**Chapter Forty Three:**

"You're doing really well Starla, push!" The doctor shouted from his position between her legs. I tried to focus my eyes on the ceiling as she clutched my hand so tightly I thought she was going to crush all the bones in my hand, leaving me a cripple yet again.

"C'mon Starla, push!" A nurse encouraged her.

"I fucking am!" She shouted at the top of her lungs.

_Jeez! She can't even contain her language in a public place. _"Ow! My hand." I winced.

"Are you fucking kidding me Greg?" She shrieked at me. "Give me your hand!" She demanded as I tried to pull away. I reluctantly gave her my hand to hold again, almost screaming myself as she squeezed it so tightly. "Owwww!"

_I feel your pain. _I winced as she squeezed my hand tighter. _How can she be so strong?_

"It's fucking burning!" Starla screamed, panting heavier by the second. "It really hurts. It really, really hurts!

"Okay Starla, you're crowning now. I need you to start pushing again." The Doctor instructed, poking his head up from the sheet between her legs.

_Uh oh!_

"What the fuck do you think I've been doing here, playing soccer? Go and get me another doctor Greg! One with a brain!" She screamed at him angrily. "Ahhhhh!"

"Starla I..."

"Get the fuck out and get me another doctor moron!" She shouted at him before he could finish.

"Starla, you can't kick the doctor... ow, ow." I winced as she started to squeeze my hand tightly.

"Greg, go and get me a proper doctor. Now!" She demanded. "Go on cripple! Shake a leg!"

"Okay." I was relieved to finally get my hand back, finding it difficult to hold my crutches as I hobbled off out the room, seeing Nick starting to wake up. "Nicky." I hopped towards him, watching him blinking his eyes open a few times. He looked very dizzy and queasy, like he must have been seeing double of me.

"Nicky are you..."

"Are you fucking kidding me!" Starlas voice echoed out into the hall, cutting me off.

Nick looked around disorientated then up at me. "Is that Starla?" Groggily rubbing his eyes open, he struggled to keep his head up straight. "Is she havin' the...?"

"Yep, baby's on the way." I nodded.

"Shit!" Nick scrambled to his feet, immediately toppling over as he was still a little queasy. "Ow."

"Oh my God! Nicky, are you okay?" I hobbled towards him, unable to bend down to check.

A nurse immediately rushed over to check on him as she saw him crash to the floor. Another doctor and a nurse immediately joined her, trying to help Nick up to his feet. They rolled him over onto his back revealing blood down his chin.

"Oh my... Is he okay?" I panicked seeing all the blood down his chin.

The doctor checked him over then looked round at me. "He's okay, he bit his lip." The doctor informed me. "Grab that wheelchair." He instructed the nurse beside him.

"Greg! Greg!" Starlas voice called out to me. "Get back in here now!"

_Shit! He left me again. _I moaned as they took him off to get his wound checked out.

I hobbled back to the hospital room, looking at the bright red face on Starla. Her face looked like it was going to explode any second what with all the anger and pushing she was doing. I fully expected her head to explode and her brains to cover all the people in this room, expect the doctor between her legs as he was covered by the disgusting teal coloured sheet.

"Greg! Why are you just standing there?" She shrieked at me. "Get over here now!" I hopped round to the side of her bed again so she could hold my hand as she cursed and screamed her foul potty mouth continuously.

"Starla, you have to control your push!" The doctor informed her, regretting it as he saw the angry look on her face once again. He gulped hard then disappeared back under the sheet. "There you go Starla. The baby's head is out. Keep pushing Starla!"

"You think this is fucking easy?" She yelled at him. I felt my stomach churning as I saw blood dripping out between her legs. _Of all the things I've seen I never thought I was squeamish to child birth. But then again I've never witnessed child birth before!_

"That's it Starla, you're doing really well." The doctor smiled widely at her, trying to keep her calm. "Keep pushing."

"Ahhhhh... I fucking hate Nick!" She yelled, squeezing my hand even tighter that I actually heard a bone click, making my eyes water. _Don't cry Greg, don't cry! _I scolded myself.

"Here it comes. Shoulders... torso... you're doing really well Starla, one more big push!" The doctor shouted.

"God I'm never having sex again!" She yelled as she made a final push.

"Can I get that on tape?" I joked, getting an evil frown from her.

"Here it comes Starla." The doctor shouted. I held my stomach with my other hand, trying to hold back from being sick.

"Here he is. It's a boy" The doctor announced, lifting the baby up as the nurses wrapped a blanket around him.

Starla looked at the baby wide eyed. She turned her head to look at me, seeing I had the exact same look on my face. "Uh Oh... whoops." She smiled innocently at me.

* * *

I leant over the trash can in front of me again as my stomach twisted inside of me, making me puke my guts up even more. My heart started to pound so hard against the surface of my ribcage, I felt as though it was going to tear right through my chest. I closed my eyes as I struggled to handle my breathing, leaning right over the trash can again as I threw up another round.

"Sir," A doctor rushed towards me. "Are you alright sir? We should get you back into the hospital."

"No, no. I'm fine. No hospital." I pulled out of his arms, struggling to keep my balance as I started to feel dizzy and even more nauseous.

"We should really get you checked out sir. You don't look so good."

"I'm fine." I smiled up at him. "I'm not sick... I mean I was just sick... but I'm not sick, sick... I just... apparently I'm squeamish to child birth." I struggled to keep my heart rate down as the feeling of nausea washed over me again.

The doctor stepped back, watching me with concern. "Do you want to sit down?" He suggested. "How about I get you some water?"

"No." I shook my head again, trying to pace my heavy breathing now that my airway was clear. "I just need Nick."

"Nick, was he the man you came in with?" He asked, watching me cautiously. "The man who bit his lip?"

"Yeah..." I panted.

"I'll go find him, alright?" I nodded, feeling my body starting to tremble. "I'll go get him. Just take slow deep breaths." He instructed, heading off into the hospital.

I sat myself down on the step, doing as my PTSD therapist had instructed me when I feel like this, even though this wasn't a usual panic attack, I had the same symptoms as the others.

I closed my eyes, placing one hand on my stomach and the other on my chest as I straightened my back, taking slow deep breaths. _An exercise I had learnt well over the many weeks since I got out of hospital to calm myself down during a panic attack._

I struggled to remain calm as I was sat right outside the hospital, opening my eyes to see the doctor returning without Nick, just a bottle of water in his hands. "Sorry sir, I couldn't wake him. They're gonna have to put stitches in his lip too." He handed over the bottle of water, watching as I took slow sips. "Do you get panic attacks a lot?"

I set the water down beside me, continuing to take slow deep breaths. "How did you know?"

"I'm a doctor." He smiled, pointing to his ID. "What's your name?"

"Greg."

"Well Greg, I'm Doctor Harvey." He smiled, kneeling down in front of me as he watched me breathing. "You see a therapist for these?" I nodded, feeling my heart rate starting to calm.

"Not usually for child birth though." I smirked.

He smiled slightly, trying to take my mind off it so I could relax. "So was that your girlfriend, the pregnant one?" I shook my head. "The guy then... he your boyfriend?" I looked at him a moment then nodded slightly between deep much calmer breaths. His eyes cast towards the braces around my legs. "You drove your drunk boyfriend and the pregnant lady here by yourself?"

"A lot more than that," I smiled up at him. "You'd never believe what I went through to get here." I chuckled slightly, feeling the shakes through my body starting to calm down. "Now my hand really hurts."

"Side effect of child birth," The doctor smirked. "Believe me, my wife's had three." He pulled out his wallet to show me a picture. "That's Kenneth, Gwendolyn and Isabella."

"Long names."

"My wife's idea. We call em Kenny, Gwen and Bella though." He sat down beside me on the step, watching me breathing cautiously. "So if it's not your baby then who's is it?"

"Certainly not my boyfriends," I smiled round at him. "I'm glad he wasn't in the delivery room. He woulda totally lost it." I took one more deep breath before I chugged back some water, turning to face the doctor again. "Don't you have more important patients to see?"

"You don't think you're important?" Smiling up at me, he checked his watch. "No actually, I was just getting off shift to go home. I can stay with you for a while Greg."

I smiled slightly, removing my hands from my stomach and chest as my breathing had started to calm. "I've never had one this bad before." I admitted to him.

"What happened when you had them before?" He asked curiously.

"Nick would just tell me that we were going out or something and I'd start shaking and sweating. It would pass quite quick... I hated it when he had to leave me at the physio clinic though. Priscilla my physiotherapist would never notice and I hid them well from Nick too."

"Why did you feel you had to hide them from him?"

"What are you a therapist now?" I smirked.

"No," He smiled slightly. "Just curious."

"I already feel weak enough in front of him as it is. Our entire relationship consists of him helping me through tough times. First with the psycho ex who attacked me then the car explosion, apartment explosion... the fire. Now this." I looked down at my legs.

"You're that CSI." He suddenly noticed, struggling to think. "Greg Sanders, right?"

"Yeah."

"Wow. You really survived all that?" I nodded gripping the step beneath me. "Wow and your still fighting fit." He smiled up at me.

"Wouldn't exactly say that."

"No but you are," He assured me. "Sometimes it takes losing something to realise what you had Greg." He watched me take another mouthful of water. "I'll be back to check on you in a bit Greg. I'll go see how Nick's doing." I nodded watching him climb to his feet.

I looked round at a pay phone against the wall, thinking I should call my mother because she'd be worried sick by now. I fished out some change from my pocket, struggling to my feet, carefully making my way over to the phone. I dialled her number then leant against the wall, waiting for her to answer.

"_If this isn't Greg I can't talk right now." _Her panicked voice answered.

"It is."

"_Honey!" _She gasped in relief. "_What's the point in having a freaking cell phone sweetheart when you never answer it?"_

"I'm sorry; I left it at Nick's place."

"_Where are you? You never leave the house alone."_

"Well I have now. I'm at the hospital..."

"_Oh no! How bad is it this time?" _She jumped to conclusions, just like she always does without letting me explain. "_Me and your father will be down there in a second, which hospital..."_

"Mom, would you shut up one second!" I snapped at her, struggling to keep my breathing calm once again. "_I'm_ not at the hospital..."

"_You just said you were! Don't scare me like that Gregory!"_

"No Mom, I'm at the hospital, I'm just not the patient..."

"_Oh my gosh! Are you okay? You're all delirious and not making sense. If you're not at the hospital, you really should be."_

"Mom, I'm at the hospital, just not as a patient, I was trying to say."

"_Is it Nicky! What's happened, would you like me to call his parents for you?"_

"Mom, let me explain would yah!"

"_Sorry."_

"Starlas waters broke, so I drove her to..."

"_You? You drove her? Honey, you're not supposed to drive. You could have endangered yourself, Starla the baby and anyone else you could have hit!"_

"We made it here okay. Nick came with us too..."

"_Why didn't he drive? I'm gonna have words with him next time I see him, making you drive for his unborn child and ex-wife, honestly!" _She huffed.

"Mom, you're only getting half the story because you keep interrupting me!" I snapped at her. "Nick was passed out. He drank himself into a coma then Starlas waters broke, so I had to drive her to the hospital and we're all here now, Nick had a little accident too, but he's okay."

"_So, boy or girl?"_

"Boy." I decided not to reveal all the details to her just yet.

"_Ooh! How much did he weigh?"_

"Seven pounds, eight ounces." I managed to remember before I ran out the room to throw up.

"_Ooh my goodness. So, what's he look like?" _I leant against the side of the phone booth, struggling to think of a way to put it. "_Well Gregory? Don't keep me waiting!"_

"Well... dark skin... quite dark... like really dark... anyway I think I saw black hair... possibly blue eyes... he's a little grimy last I saw him."

"_Grimy? It's a baby Gregory, babies aren't grimy." _She giggled uncontrollably.

"Oh this one was. He was covered in..." I held my stomach as I almost threw up again. "Anyway, are you coming down here?" I can't believe after all this time I actually want my overprotective mother around me.

"_Of course I will sweetheart. Which hospital?"_

"Desert Palms. Please hurry."

"_Oh sweetheart," _She giggled softly. "_You really want me there?"_

"Desperately, and I'll kill you if you ever embarrass me in front of people about this." I warned her.

"_No embarrassment, I promise. Be there as soon as I can honey."_

I hung up the phone leaning against the wall to wait for her to arrive. I couldn't go back into the hospital by myself. I felt as though I was going to have a heart attack if I stepped foot in there again.

A few minutes later my mother's brand new car pulled up outside. She jumped out the car while my dad drove it off to find somewhere to park.

"Oh sweetheart!" She ran at me with open arms.

"Not too tight." I winced as she pulled me into a bone crushing hug.

"Sorry, you smell like vomit." She immediately noticed. "Are you feeling okay honey? You look very pale, extremely pale." She immediately placed her hand on my forehead. "You're burning up, we should get you inside."

"No, I'm fine." I shook my head. "Mom, don't fuss over me."

"Sorry, where's this baby then?" She immediately asked. I watched the excitement spreading across her face, still unable to tell her the truth.

"You wonna go see him?" My mother nodded excitedly, grabbing my hand to lead me inside. "Ow."

"What? What?" She shrieked.

"Nothing, just don't squeeze my hand."

"I'm here." My dad shouted, running towards us. "Is everything okay?"

"Yes dear. We're going to see Nicky's new baby." My mother smiled, heading off into the hospital. I grabbed my crutches from where I dropped them on the steps, following her in with my dad behind us.

My mom led the way towards the baby ward, looking in through the window at the tiny screaming little babies in the little cots.

"Which one?" She asked, turning to face me. I stepped up to the window, gulping hard as I saw him. "C'mon Gregory, is he that one. He has dark hair."

"I said dark skin." I corrected. My dad stepped up beside me, looking in through the window. "He's that one... right there." I pointed. My parents followed my finger, causing their eyes to widen as they looked at the baby.

"Which one?" My mother asked confused.

"Third one from the door. In the blue blanket." I gulped hard again, watching their expressions.

"You mean, right or left from the door?" My mother asked, still confused.

"Left, that one right there."

"I didn't know Starla was black." My dad smiled at me.

"She's not." Me and my mother both said in sync with each other.

"Oh..." He gasped. "Is Nick..."

"Well it's clearly not his then." My mother angrily hissed, turning to face me. "Is it?"

"No, Starla was just as surprised as me when he came out. He looks a lot cleaner now."

"Greg." Doctor Harvey smiled as he walked towards me. "There you are, I went looking for you to make sure you were alright."

"What? What happened?" My mother panicked.

"Nothing, nothing happened. I just got a little sick after watching child birth. I'm fine mom."

Doctor Harvey smiled at both my parents. "Well Nick's awake now Greg. He's a little groggy at the moment..."

"Where is he?" My mother interrupted him.

"Room 321 ma'am."

"Mom, where are you..." I shouted after her, but she was already off down the hall. _Damn it!_

"C'mon Greg." My dad assisted me off towards Nick's room.

Nick was propped up on the bed with a nurse stood beside him, mopping the blood up from his chin. "Greg." He groggily smiled at me. "That's my boyfriend Greg." He informed the nurse.

"He's a cutie." She smiled round at me. "There we go, all done." The nurse fiddled with some of the machines by his bed, while my mother rushed to his side.

"Nicky, are you alright?" My mother panicked.

"Greg I got three stitches in my lip." Nick slurred, giving out a drunken laugh.

"Ouch." I cringed, smiling at his adorableness.

"He's going to be fine." The nurse assured us all, cleaning up the bloody cotton buds and things. We all waited for her to leave, before we started talking.

"What happened Nicky?" My mother started the line of questioning.

"Mom, just leave him alone." I struggled round to the other side of the bed, looking at the bloody cotton wool under his lip. "Ouch, Nicky. Does it hurt?"

"No, I can't feel it." He reached out for my hand to hold, looking around at my parents. "Who are they?"

"My mom and dad. You've seen them before."

"Why do they have three heads?" He whispered to me in a fearful voice which only made me laugh.

"We don't have three heads!" My mother protested.

"What's she sayin' Greg?" He whispered to me.

"Mom, can you wait outside with dad a sec?" I requested. I knew she was going to refuse, but luckily my dad had more sense to take her out with him. I waited for the door to close then turned back to Nick. "Nicky, please promise me you won't drink anymore."

"Done." He nodded. I'm not even sure he knew what he was promising to, so I thought I'd try my luck.

"Promise me you'll never have sex with girls again."

"Done, never Greg... just you and only you." He groggily answered.

"You're so totally wasted right now." I chuckled, leaning against the side of his bed.

"Yep, I love you Greg."

"I know." I smiled, gently trailing my fingertips down the side of his face. "Okay Nicky, I'm gonna tell you some stuff now so you won't be mad about it okay?"

"Okay." He nodded.

"Okay, first of all... I broke into Starlas house, climbed a whole staircase and carried your heavy arse around everywhere. Second of all you're going to need a major repair job on your car..."

"What?" He asked shocked.

"Just know that it was a life or death situation and that I love you very much." I quickly covered, smiling at him sweetly. "Next, you kinda missed Starlas baby's birth... but I think you'll be pretty pleased with the outcome. Well considering you wanted to be a father in the first place, I don't think you will be overly pleased, but at least you'll be glad that you're not bound to the hip to Starla for the rest of your life. You might want to return that car seat and crib you bought for the baby though. After you get a major repair on your car, it's nothing that major, just a very large dent and a few scratches... but I really love you Nicky. Next, I think your parents will definitely side with you now, but there might be some tension between you and Warrick to come. Oh and you might be fined by this angry biker guy, we kinda demolished his Harley, totally my fault. But I don't think I'm insured..."

"Greg!" He snapped at me, holding both my arms. "You're aware I'm drunk and I can't understand a word you're sayin' . . . especially when you ramble like that. So, what the hell are you talkin' bout?"

"The baby's not yours."

* * *

**Please Review.**

**Sorry it took so long to write, I've been off sick for the past few days. I hope you enjoyed it.**


	44. Chapter 44

**Chapter Forty Four:**

"Hey bud." Nick smiled as I opened my eyes. I sleepily rubbed my eyes open to look up at him, realising we were still in the hospital, only he was in the bed while I was on a chair for once. "You okay Greg?" I nodded, shifting my weight on the chair to sit up straight. "Thanks for drivin' Starla here."

"No problem." I smiled at him, yawning widely. "Actually . . . it was a problem . . . a very big problem. The next time you knock a girl up I want no part of it Nick."

He smiled wider, reaching out for my hand. "I'm sorry you had to deal with that Greg. I'm amazed you did it."

"It wasn't easy. I feel so tired now." I climbed to my feet, holding his hands in mine. "How's your lip?"

"Numb," Smiling slightly, he brushed his thumb across the back of my hand. "I have a splittin' headache too."

"That's what drinking will do to yah." I smirked, trailing my fingertips down the side of his face. "How long was I asleep for?"

"I don't know. I passed out sometime last night; you've been asleep since I woke up though." Shifting over slightly on the bed, he patted the empty spot. "Sit with me Greg." I struggled to climb up onto the bed, being pulled up into his strong arms. I rested my back against his chest, enjoying the warm loving embrace after everything I went through yesterday. "Are you okay bud?" Whispering against my neck, he placed a gentle kiss to my jaw, immediately wincing as he hurt his lip. "Ow."

I snickered slightly, looking up at him. "I'm fine. Are you okay?"

He nodded, resting the side of his face against mine. "Are you okay to be in the hospital though G?"

"I'm not the one in the bed." I swallowed hard before responding further. "I'm okay. I wonna get out of here though."

"We won't have to be here much longer." He assured me, tightening his grip around my waist. "I'm sorry Greg . . . I didn't expect it to happen tonight."

"My mom says it always happens when you least expect it. She was escorting her cousin down the stairs of her debutant ball when her waters broke with me." Nick laughed, holding me tighter as his lips lingered on my neck. I could still smell the booze on his breath, along with the strong stench of blood.

"Do I remember somethin' about a baby?"

"Yeah," I gritted my teeth as I turned to face him. "You don't remember me telling you..."

"Did you say it wasn't mine?" He cut me off as he remembered. "Did you mean it? Or was it wishful thinkin'?"

"Yeah I meant it, I mean no... it's not yours. Or he even. He's not yours. I meant it."

"How do you know?" He asked with a hint of disappointed in his voice.

"It's not that hard to tell. You don't have to be a DNA expert to be able to tell that the baby isn't yours." I turned in his arms to see a tear in his eye. "Are you okay?"

"No... how could she do that to me? I stayed with her . . . I drove her to doctors appointments . . . I promised I would never leave her . . . I was with her every fuckin' step of the way . . . I even signed up for soddin' parentin' classes!"

"Nicky..."

"I was so fuckin' happy about bringin' a child into this world, now I'm a fuckin' big joke!"

"Nicky, I don't think that you're a jo..."

"Fuckin' bitch! How could she do that to me? I was with her every freakin' step of the way and she does this to me! I can't believe I promised that I'd stay with her to look after this baby. I wasted my freakin' time on her, especially while she was bangin'..." Nick looked at me. "Well I can only think of one person, but I don't want it to be true."

"Nicky..."

"Fuckin' bastards. I hate people." He grumbled, folding his arms across his chest.

"You don't hate me do you?"

"No." He huffed, avoiding eye contact with me. "Just everyone else."

"Everyone else didn't cheat on you Nicky, Starla and... some black guy did." I carefully masked my answer.

"Some black guy owes me big." Sighing heavily, his eyes travelled towards the door. "Is that your parents?"

I followed his gaze towards the door. "Yes," I chuckled as I recalled what he called them last night. "That's the three headed monsters."

"I don't wonna see them right now." He sulked in a depressed tone.

"Like my mom would give you a choice," I looked at Nick's glum expression. "I'll get rid of them." I struggled to climb up off the bed, limping off towards the door.

"Hello sweetheart. Sorry to disturb, we just came to see if you wanted a lift home?" My mother asked.

"No, we're okay. Thanks mom." She pecked me on the cheek then walked off with my dad. I clicked the door shut behind me then turned back to Nick. "How about ice cream?" I suggested with a small smile.

"I don't want any." He muttered, leaning back on the bed.

"Jell-O? Everybody loves Jell-O." I smiled at him.

"No." He shook his head.

"Nicky!" I groaned, limping off towards the side of his bed. "You can't be like this forever. Eight months ago you didn't even want this baby, you can't be this upset."

"I am."

"Nicky." Sighing heavily, I leant on the side of his bed, looking into his eyes. "If it _was_ your baby, would you want to be bound to Starla for the rest of your life? Would you want your child to be saying on their graduation day, 'there's my mom and there's my dad who I never see and has a relationship with a cripple'..."

"You're not a cripple."

"I will be according to Starla. Would you really want to have a baby with her? The woman who hates you was going to be raising your child more than fifty percent of the time. That wasn't going to leave a very healthy relationship for you and your son."

"It was a boy?" He questioned. I nodded looking at the sad expression remaining on his face. "I coulda had a son?"

"Uh huh," I lifted his hand in mine, curling our fingers together. "Are you okay Nicky?"

"I feel like I just lost a child."

"I could go snatch yah one from the baby ward." I joked, watching a small smile spread across his lips.

"No thank you Greg. That's very thoughtful of you, but I think that's against the law." He smirked, looking up into my eyes. "I suppose we could have some ice cream."

"I'll go ask one of the nurses." I pressed a kiss to his forehead, slowly limping off out the room. I found the nurse that called me a 'cutie' asking if Nick could have some ice cream. She bought us some vanilla ice cream, telling Nick it would hurt when it touched his lips; she forgot to warn him about 'brain freeze' though.

"Stop laughin' G," Nick scolded me, holding his head as I giggled. "It hurts."

"It should." I smiled sweetly at him. "Even tough guys get brain freeze."

"Even geeks can't find their mouths." He smirked back, gently wiping his thumb across my lower lip. "I love you Greg, you always make everythin' better."

"If only." I sighed softly, leaning against the side of his bed, setting down the empty bowl of ice cream on the tray table.

"If only what G?"

"If I really could make things better . . . I could give you the child that you deserve. You'd make a great father Nicky."

Nick wrapped his arms around me, pulling me closer. "You don't have to give me anythin' G."

"But you wanted to be a dad so much. Now it's as though . . . this black guy has pulled the rug out from under you and you're left dangling." Groaning softly, I slumped back into the chair behind me. "I can't do anything right."

"Hey Greg," Nick climbed off the bed, kneeling down in front of me. "This isn't your fault. You always told me that bitch was trouble and I never believed you, I should of back then when I could of saved myself so much hassle. I don't care that you can't ever give me a child Greg, I love you anyway."

"But being a father is your dream Nicky. You can't complete your dream if you stay with me. You're the only guy that wants to be a father but can't."

Nick climbed to his feet, pulling me up with him. "I'd rather be with you than be a father." He slid his hands up my back, pulling me closer as he softly kissed me, wincing as his sore lip contacted mine. "Ouch."

"Sorry."

Nick chuckled softly, brushing his fingers through my hair. "Don't worry about it. Can we please go home now?"

"I have to talk to your doctor first. Your lip doesn't look too bad so we should be able to go home soon."

"Let me talk to the doctor, you stay here." Nick pecked me on the cheek, heading off out the room. I dropped back into a chair, feeling as though I could sleep for a month.

Nick quickly returned, grabbing his coat off the back of the chair. "C'mon, we can go now."

"Oh yeah Nick, do you remember the talk about your car?" I asked nervously through gritted teeth.

"Yes, apparently you totalled my car..."

"It wasn't totalled, not completely." I interrupted him, watching a wide smirk spread across his lips. "It's just... badly dented."

"Okay," He grinned, pulling me to my feet. "I believe you. C'mon, I wonna go home." He pulled his jacket on then grabbed my crutches for me. "We'll call a taxi."

We soon arrived home together, both completely exhausted. Nick dropped down onto the couch while I grabbed some ice from the fridge, joining Nick on the sofa. "Here," I sat down beside him, placing the ice carefully on his lip. "Does it feel better?"

"A little. I'm tired."

"I hear yah." I smirked. "I've never been so exhausted in my whole life. At least now things will start getting back to normal once again." _I hope!_

"I hope so too." He smiled as best he could with ice on his lip, looking up into my eyes. "C'mon, sleep." Nick climbed to his feet, pulling me up with him. He dumped the ice cube in the empty glass on the table, leading me by the hand towards the bedroom. "Hey, we made it through everythin' G." He gently pushed me back on the bed to unstrap the leg braces. "You know, this baby thing doesn't seem like such a big deal anymore."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I think you're right . . . I think I dodged a bullet."

_You won't when you find out who the father is. _I thought to myself, watching him fiddling with the straps.

"Did you really climb a staircase?"

"Yes . . . up and then down." I chuckled.

"I'm proud of you Greg." He leant over me to press a kiss to my lips. "Ouch." He immediately winced.

"You gotta stop doing that." I giggled.

"I love you too much." He held his lower lip in agony a moment, climbing off me to slide the braces off my legs.

"Well you can love me when your lip is better. Did you lock the door?"

"Locked and secured, along with the alarm. You're safe." He assured me, pulling my sneakers off. I crawled back on the bed on my elbows once they were off, watching Nick pulling his clothes off. "Can you sleep with the windows open?" I shook my head so he pulled his jeans off then went to pull the curtains closed.

I lifted the covers as he crawled under with me, wrapping my arms securely around him. "Goodnight Nicky."

"Goodnight Bubba." He smiled at me. "Baby, I've gotta go to work tomorrow. Sara will pick you up for your physiotherapy session."

"I thought you didn't trust her driving." I giggled. "Do I really have to go?"

"You already missed two days Greg."

"Is she taking me home too?" I sighed in defeat, knowing I wasn't going to win this battle. _As always._

"No, I am. I might be a little late though, so don't panic."

"Okay," I sighed softly, pulling him closer against my chest. "I love you Nick."

"Love you too."

_At least he doesn't know the father is Warrick yet._

_Unless he does. _I panicked, listening to his soft breathing. Maybe that's why he's going into work tomorrow. _Who knows what a hot headed Texan like himself would do to Warrick._

He can't know though. He didn't even want to see the baby yesterday.

* * *

"Sara."

"Jeez Greg! You scared the hell outta me." She gasped as I appeared in front of her. She held her chest breathing heavily, trying to calm herself down.

"Sorry. Who gave you a key?" I asked, looking at the set of keys in her hands that she used to let herself in.

"Nick." Sara pushed the door shut behind her, looking around the apartment. "Wow, this is a nice place. You know we haven't seen you in a while Greg."

"So?" I asked, watching her eyes exploring the apartment.

"So... we're worried about you Greg. Nick is too."

"He is?" I asked shocked as he always talked to me about everything. "Why did he tell you?"

"Because he trusts me," Sara took a few steps further into the apartment, looking out the large windows. "You can't hibernate in here forever Greg."

"I'm not." I sheepishly shoved my hands deep into my pockets, leaning back against the wall behind me. "Are you here to take me to the physiotherapy or not?"

"I just wonna help you Greg. You used to be so full of life, now you're just hibernating in Nick's apartment. Grissom said you could of come back to work weeks ago Greg." She shoved her hands into her pockets, slowly turning round to face me. "Greg, why don't you come back to work? Just for today to see everyone?" She suggested.

"No, I don't want to."

"C'mon Greg, one hour... tops. I've already cleared it with Nick..."

"You've cleared it with Nick? He's not my babysitter." I almost snapped at her. "Can you go please?"

"Greg, I'm here to take you to physiotherapy."

"I don't wonna go. Can you just go now please?" I felt a shiver rush down my spine as my arms and legs started shaking.

"Nick told me I have to..."

"No, I don't wonna go! Please just go!" I shouted as my heart started pounding in my chest. Sara nodded, stepping past me and heading back out the door.

Once she was out I slid the locks in place, making my way to the bathroom as I felt as though I was going to be sick.

* * *

"Greg." I heard Nick's voice whispering to me, waking me up from a deep sleep. I opened my eyes slowly, looking up into his. "Hi," He smiled softly, gently brushing his fingers through my hair. "You okay baby?"

I nodded; stretching out on the bed I had fallen asleep on and spent half my day on. "Nicky, your knuckles cracked." I lifted his hand to inspect the wound. "How did you get this?"

"It's nothin'."

"Doesn't look like nothing." I looked round at the time. "Your home early too. You said you'd be late."

"And you said you'd be goin' to physiotherapy." Nick climbed onto the bed beside me, laying down on his side. "What happened G?"

"You first . . . was it a wall or someone's face?" I asked, judging his expression so I could tell if he was lying or not.

"I know who the father is."

"Father...? The baby's father?" Nick nodded, looking down at his split knuckle. "And did you hit this father?"

"Yes." He shamefully nodded. "The bastard deserved it though."

"Nicky." Holding his clenched fist in both of my hands, I looked up into his eyes. "Is this father... alive?"

"Yes. I didn't hit him more than once." Nick rolled onto his back, staring up at the ceiling. "It's Warrick would you believe."

"Seriously?" I tried to act surprised.

"Yes, Starla told me. She even showed me the DNA test to prove it. I can't believe he would do that to me . . . or her. Then he tried to hide it from me. He knew how fuckin' happy I was about this baby! And becomin' a father!" He angrily snapped. "You're the only one I can trust Greg . . . you've never lied to me have you?" I gulped nervously then shook my head as he looked up at me. He rolled back slightly, looking at me curiously. "Oh my God, you have? What have you lied to me about Greg?"

"Nothing major . . . it was for your own good."

"What?" He snapped, feeling hurt. "I thought I could trust you Greg."

"You can... you really can." I nervously fidgeted on the spot, looking up into his watery eyes. "Nicky... I knew about Warrick and Starla..."

"What? Fuck Greg! I just fuckin' told you I trusted you and you knew who the father was all along? Why the fuck didn't you tell me before?"

"If you let me finish, I knew about Starla and Warrick before... but Warrick told me he only slept with her once and Starla said the first time it was an accident."

"You knew! And they both knew that you knew. Why the fuck didn't you tell me? I thought we trusted each other?" He shouted, getting angrier by the second.

"Whoa, hold up. Listen to me Nick. I knew about them about three years ago. Starla slept with Warrick after you two got married..."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because... then you'd always see me as the reason you lost your wife. I mean you said it before Nick. If it wasn't for me you'd be..."

"I didn't mean that!" He cut me off, flinching in pain as his teeth touched his lip again. "I swear Greg, I didn't mean that."

"You still said it though. Imagine if I did tell you three years ago when it happened. We probably would have never got together... we probably wouldn't even be friends. I'd probably be the one on the end of those angry fists of yours."

"I'd never hit you Greg." Putting his arm around me, he snuggled closer to me, resting his head on my shoulder.

"If we never got together you might have." I whispered.

"Never . . . so seriously, three years ago? Warrick's been with Starla for three years? That's how long I was married to her."

"I know . . . shortly after you two got married they slept together. As far as I know they haven't been together since." Nick closed his eyes as he tried to process the information. "Nicky I tried to tell you before, I..."

"I remember . . . after we got married you kept tellin' me she was wrong for me." Nick looked up at me as he opened his eyes. "Why didn't you ever tell me the truth?"

"I didn't want to be the reason you two broke up." I explained again, looking at the hurt all across his face.

"But you could have had me quicker Greg." He chuckled. "Wouldn't you have wanted that baby?"

"I don't hurt people to get what I want." I smiled softly, pressing a kiss to his forehead. "My Nana Olaf said everything happens for a reason."

"Really? Well I really doubt I woulda been mad at you for tellin' me the truth back then Greg."

"We'll never know."

Nick sighed softly, repositioning himself against my chest. "You seriously are the only person I can trust Greg."

"So..." I gently brushed my fingers through his hair, holding him close. "What are you gonna do about Warrick?"

"I don't know." Sighing heavily, he closed his eyes against my chest. "I can't believe that bitch slept with him then made me feel guilty for walkin' out on her then tellin' me she was pregnant with my baby, when I knew we hadn't had sex in ages."

"You should be happy now Nicky... you dodged the parenting bullet." I smiled, gently stroking my fingers through his hair still. "So... why are you home early anyway?"

"Oh . . . because I hit Warrick... Grissom broke us up then he sent me home."

"That's a relief." Nick looked up at me shocked. "I mean for your sake. I don't want you to go to jail . . . or kill Warrick."

"I wouldn't kill him Greg."

"You can't control yourself when you're angry though Nicky."

"I think we should get away for a while." Nick leant up on his elbow, looking deep into my eyes. "Do you want to... get away for a while?"

"With you?" I asked surprised.

"No with Mr Hamlet next door," He joked. "Of course with me Greg. We can go anywhere you want, just the two of us together." He softly sucked on my lower lip, gently brushing his fingertips through my hair. He winced from the pain in his lip again, giving me a slight smile. "Do you want to?"

"Yes," A wide grin spread across my lips. "I'd love to."

He smiled softly, wrapping his arm securely around my chest. "Your turn Greg, you have to tell me why you didn't go today."

"I'm not going if Sara has to take me."

"Greg, Sara's your friend." He looked up into my eyes, caressing the side of my face.

"You're a liar too Nick." He looked at me shocked. "Sara said you're worried about me, but you never told me."

"Greg..."

"See, you come in here calling me a liar for protecting you against Warrick's betrayal, when you're lying to me too."

"This is a little different than..."

"Is not!" I protested. "You always think that everything to do with you is always different or more important than me!" I pushed him away from me, struggling to climb off the bed.

"Where are you goin'?"

"I'm going to be sick."

"Okay..." Nick scrambled off the bed to help me to the bathroom. "Are you okay?" He asked as I started throwing up.

"I'm puking my guts up, do I look okay?" I snapped at him as I struggled to breath.

"Sorry." He softly soothed me by gently rubbing his hand up and down my back. "I don't think I'm more important than you are Greg. You're far more important. I just meant it's a little different because Warrick betrayin' me is far greater than me tellin' Sara about how scared I am for you."

"Why are you scared for me?"

"This for starters. Look, there's blood again. You're yakkin' up so much it makes you bleed." He grabbed a wash cloth from the sink, soaking it in cold water.

"You're talking about me in front of Sara and who knows who else, acting like my freaking warden. I'm not a child Nick!"

"I know that..."

"Clearly you think I'm some weak helpless little kid that you got stuck with." I sat down on the floor, taking the cold wash cloth from his hands and he passed it to me.

"No I don't Greg." Nick sat on the edge of the bathtub, watching me cautiously.

"Then why do you always tell other people what you're feeling and not me? If you're scared . . . tell me!"

"Fine! I'm scared Greg. I'm scared for you. You never leave the house alone anymore." He confessed.

"I did . . . I took Starla to the hospital."

"That's not a very big step Greg. That's the first time you've left the apartment alone since you got out of hospital. When you do leave here it's only for your physiotherapy, but you never go alone and you get terrified if I'm even a minute late to pick you up. This isn't like you at all Greg and your therapist told me you stopped visitin' him too, you lied to me that you were still goin'."

I pulled my knees up to my chest, looking up at Nick as I wrapped my arms around them tightly.

"Greg . . . I really am scared for you. I don't know what to do anymore."

"I'm sorry I'm such a burden to you." I whispered softly.

"You're not Greg." He climbed off the bathtub, kneeling down in front of me. "You're not a burden to me baby. I just wonna help you. I'm gonna need a little help from you though . . . like not shoutin' at Sara when she's tryin' to help you for starters."

"I didn't shout."

"She said you shouted at her to leave." Nick gently brushed his fingers through my hair, looking into my eyes.

"I didn't mean to . . . she wanted me to go to the lab."

"Greg," He gently placed his hands on my knees, sucking in a deep breath before he spoke. "You need help sweetie. You can't hide up here forever. There is a real world outside of this apartment . . . it's not scary . . . or dangerous. Maybe you wonna go out into it every once in a while?" He suggested, giving me a soft smile. "Not alone . . . obviously."

"I don't know if I can."

"I think you can. You've gotta have more faith in yourself baby. We'll get that thousand watt smile back on your face before yah know it." He smiled, trailing his fingertips across my chin. "And I'm gonna be with you every step of the way."

* * *

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter.**

**Please Review**


	45. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

"What about our happily ever after?" I asked Nick as we watched the end of 'The Accidental Husband', we didn't watch it by choice, it was just on TV while we were surfing.

"Our happy ever after?" He asked, wrapping his arms securely around my waist while his moist warm lips lingered on my neck. "Well for starters neither one of us is gettin' married, so neither one of us can sweep in on a fire truck to propose our undyin' love to the other." Giggling softly, I looked up into his eyes. "But I suppose... if you want to. Will you marry me?"

"Is that your version of a romantic proposal?" I smirked, turning to face him.

"I think it's romantic," Nick lifted his hips as he dug his hand deep into his pocket, lifting something out with a closed fist. "See, I have this very expensive titanium band, I don't have a fire truck though." He smirked as Patrick and Emma from the movie rode off on the back of the fire truck. "But... will you..."

"Wait," I held his fist closed before he revealed the ring.

"You don't want to?"

"Yes I do," I rolled over to face him completely, straddling his thighs. "Just I'm a guy; I can't tell people my boyfriend proposed to me while we were watching 'The accidental husband'." I giggled.

"Oh, true." He agreed then grabbed the remote to turn the movie off, looking up at the clock. "We're right on time anyway."

"Wait, where are you going?" I asked as he climbed to his feet, grabbing his shoes. "My answer wasn't no. Right on time for what? Nick! It was..."

"I know." He interrupted me, pecking me on the cheek. "C'mon, we're goin' out."

"No, no... I don't want to."

"I'm going with you," He pulled me to my feet.

"We're not going to get married in front of an Elvis guy are we?" I asked as I pulled my sneakers on.

"No," He chuckled, grabbing our coats. "C'mon, we don't wonna be late."

"Late?" I questioned confused, following after him towards the elevator. "How can we be late? What are we late for? Where are we going?"

"Trust me." Is all he said, winking at me as he lead me off towards his car as we reached the parking lot.

* * *

"Mr Stokes," A strange man smiled at him, shaking his hand. I looked at Nick curiously, wondering what was going on. "Right this way." He escorted us towards a helicopter landing pad.

I squeezed Nick's hand tighter in my own as we approached it. "Nicky, what are we doing here?" I whispered, feeling my arms shaking as we got closer.

"It's a surprise." Lifting my chin up with his free hand, he kissed the tip of my nose, giving me his dashingly handsome smile. "C'mon Greg."

I felt my arms and legs shaking even more as he dragged me off towards the helicopter. "Nicky, I can't go in that."

"Yes you can, trust me Greg." He held both my hands, walking backwards towards it as he looked in my eyes. "It's okay, I'm right here with you." His soothing voice made me relax slightly. I took a deep breath then followed him into the helicopter, wondering how long he had been planning this whole thing. "It's called the limousine of the sky." Nick smiled as he took a seat beside me inside.

The helicopter slowly took off into the sky above Las Vegas, flying over the many sights I had only ever seen from the ground during my time in Las Vegas, but I never stopped to enjoy them before now.

We soared over the beautiful city lights, looking down at Glitch Gulch, the Stratosphere tower then over the fountains of Bellagio from a beautiful bird's eye view.

"This a more romantic gesture for you Greg?" Nick smiled, holding my hand tightly in his own across our laps.

"Uh huh," I nodded, gasping at the beautiful sights around us. "Why'd you bring me . . . all the way up here though?"

"Because, you haven't been out into the world in months," We both looked out the window down at the Excalibur. "You told me that the world seems so big and scary, and that's why you won't go out into it." Gently caressing my chin with his thumb, he looked deep into my eyes. "Doesn't look so big from up here huh?" I shook my head as we looked over the tiny city beneath us. "So Greg, will you marry me?"

"Right here?" I asked, advancing closer to him.

"Yeah," Nick's breathing steadied as he captured my lips with his for a slow passionate kiss, letting his tongue gently linger in my mouth as he brushed his fingers through my hair. He slowly broke the kiss, pulling the ring from his pocket. His eyes stared deep into mine for the longest time, but he didn't move. His body was stiff as he held the ring between his thumb and index finger.

"Nick..." I cleared my throat, frowning slightly as he was silently nervous. "Are you..."

"I'm okay," He nodded before I could finish, lifting my other hand from my lap. "Greg Sanders . . . will you marry me?"

"Yes!" My breath caught in my throat, accompanied by a few tears and a warm tingle down my spine. He slid the cold titanium band onto my finger with shaky hands. His warm lips touched my cheek as he pulled me into a hug, resting his head against mine. I melted against his warm body, giggling softly as the excitement bubbled up inside of me. "I love you, Nicholas Stokes."

"I love you too, Greg Sanders."

* * *

Sometime Later...

Letting out a long exasperated breath, I reclined back in my computer chair, running my fingers through my hair. I glanced up at the time realising I hadn't written a single word in over three hours. It was as though my mind was running on empty today.

I sorted through the stacks of notes that littered my desk, re-reading through every little imaginative piece that I had written down, still coming up on empty. My mind was completely vacant.

I struggled to think for another long hour. I let my thoughts run wild, but each one sounded stupider than the last so I decided to call it a day.

I walked off into the garden, smelling the strong scents of dead leaves and freshly cut grass from the neighbour's garden. It was a cold, fall afternoon. The crispy dead leaves crunched beneath my feet with each step. A gust of cold wind brushed against my back, making the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. The leaves around me swept up in a gust of wind, blowing wildly around me like a mini tornado. I closed my eyes as they clattered noisily around me, feeling goosebumps starting to form across my arms.

"Are you gonna stand out here in the cold all day?" That familiar husky Texan drawl startled me out of my thoughts. He wrapped his strong arms around my waist snugly, resting his chin on my shoulder. "You're freezin' baby."

"I like the cold." I leant back in his embrace, feeling his affectionate warm lips on my neck. "It's a change from the sweltering heat back in Las Vegas."

"I don't want you to catch a cold though Greg." He gently rubbed his hands up and down my sides to warm me up. "Whatcha doin' out here anyway? You said you'd be workin' on your book all day."

"I was. I have writers block."

"Writers block?"

"Uh huh," I slid my hands across his arms to join our hands together on my stomach, leaning comfortably back into his affectionate grasp around me. "Remember our first night here?"

"How could I forget?" He turned me in his arms to face him, slipping his hands into mine as he pulled me close. "I believe it was a moonlit sky." He recalled with a wide smile spreading across his lips as his eyes locked into mine.

"Yep . . . your eyes were glowing under the moon's dim light." I slid my hands up his biceps, wrapping them securely around his neck. His hands in turn slid down my sides to rest at my hips. "There wasn't any music, but we danced together for hours." My thousand watt smile beamed up at him.

"That's right gorgeous." Sporting a Cheshire grin, he advanced closer towards my lips, kissing me passionately.

"Daddy!" A small voice cheered, trudging through the leaves towards us. I swept him up in my arms, lifting him up to join our dance. Nick wrapped his arms around us both, pulling us closer against his body. "Daddy... why are you dancing? There's no music."

"He's a very clever seven year old." I smirked, gently ruffling his dark brown hair that looks just like Nick's.

"That's how I know he has my brains." Nick teased me, pressing a kiss to Luke's forehead as he looked into his chocolate brown eyes.

"Don't I get a kiss?" I pouted up at him. Luke pressed a kiss to my cheek, immediately wiping his lips with the back of his hand. "Thank you."

"You're welcome daddy." He grinned widely with his cheeky little smile.

"It took us ten years Greg . . . but we're finally here." Nick whispered against my ear as he pressed a warm kiss to my neck.

It took ten years but everything seemed to have fallen into place, right where we wanted it to be.

Now for the cheesy fairytale ending . . . or is it just the beginning for us?

And we lived happily ever after . . .

Most of the time

* * *

END

**I hope you enjoyed this story. This is the first story I've posted written from a single persons point of voice. I wrote this one a while ago when I first started writing Nick and Greg slash stories, but it was only twenty chapters long and Starla wasn't in it. So I hope you enjoyed the new and improved version I posted for you all to read. :D**

**I have lots more stories still to come, I'm just going to try and finish 'Without You', 'It's not what you think' and 'No Regrets' before I start posting chapters for them.**

**I hope you're not too disappointed with the ending. I wrote five different versions, but I liked this one the best. Thanks so much for all your reviews and support on this story.**

**Love and Hugs to you all! :D**

**~ Holly**


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